Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

shadow1 · shadow1

I’m searching for some ES&H on letting go. I don’t do it very well and have struggled with it for a while. I did finally let someone go that I thought was out of my life for good. It took a long time for me to do this but I finally got to the point that I could say to myself it is finished. I have felt tha...

ally · ally

((((((((((((ROOMIES)))))))))))

This has been a difficult week for me. For my emotional wellbeing. I have not been to f2f for last two weeks. This is has become a pattern for me. I jump wholeheartedly into my programme. Then when I struggle with something, I pull back from it. So...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((((((Jerry F)))))))), Just wanted to make sure you and your family are safe in Hawaii. Hope you came through it okay. Let us know. Sending prayers your way. Live strong, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty

Becky1 · Becky1

Well, as some of you know, I had a major meltdown last week, and punched (many times) my freshly painted kitchen wall. That was on Sat., last week. It left a hole, not real big, but knuckle sized. My walls are painted green, so the white drywall really showed thru. And i...

Lunamoth · Lunamoth

((((((Everyone)))))) After giving it some thought about my part in the things going on in my life (thank you Christy

) I've come to a few conclusions... the biggest one is the day of my last post I was finding it very easy to blame my A. I spoke the truth, I am in many ways the way I am because...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

(((Hello Group))) I have learned that just because an A gets sober doesn't mean that everything is magically changed. My A still struggles with old behavior patterns. He's stubborn and strong willed. He gets into these power struggles with me or with other people over issues...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Someone posted last week about A's and druggies getting on a moral high horse or thinking they know better what to do in all situations etc. I just wanted to revisit that. My A last weekend took the kids to the beach (first time he's been alone with them anywhere ever that I can remember) and...

barisax · barisax

After looking at my previous post, I thought maybe I should bring this topic up. It's not something I discuss in my normal circle at all. In part because it just doesn't come up, but also because I don't want to be chided for not being able to let go. I have been divorced longer than I was married... for...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

this song really touches me with my current situation. its called let him fly by jessica simpson. Ain't no talkin to this man Ain't no pretty other side Ain't no way to understand the stupid words of pride It would take an acrobat, and I already tried all that so I'm gonna let him fly Things can...

BlueCloud · BlueCloud

Dear Roomies, For as long as I can remember, I have been very afraid of things that I can't control (lightening storms, illness, and war). I worried about storms, illness, and war ALOT as a kid. I can see now that I may have been doing this as a way of expressing how worried I was about how out of control...

hersh · hersh

(((Hi everyone))) Well I did get away for Friday and Saturday night. I almost changed my mind at the last minute, got really sad Friday at work and canceled the reservations where I was going to go. I just wanted to be home, whether AH was drunk or not, there or not, just wanted to pine away...

Phil · Phil

The Language of Letting Go. Feelings and Surrender Surrendering is a highly personal and spiritual experience. Surrender is not something we can do in our heads. It is not something we can force or control by willpower. It is something we experience. Acceptance, or surrender, is not a ti...

rtexas · rtexas

((((Everyone)))) Today I find myself thinking about how far out of my comfort zone I am in putting a big boundry in place. Has it really been that long ago that I stuck to what was right, just because it was the right thing to do? The answer of course is yes, it's been a long time. I have s...

rtexas · rtexas

((((Everyone)))) For those wondering if the A and I went on our date... yes we did. It is an unusual place. Our city is a little bit of everything. To the east and south is flat farmland, and to the west is hills. In the middle of those hills is a beautiful lake. For those of y...

Lunamoth · Lunamoth

I'm letting it all out tonight, hope you all don't mind. My mother is dieing. She is all but gone now. My father who recently had a heart attack and open heart surgery is determined to keep her home. I look at her and my heart is just is so full of sadness. Last night...

Phil · Phil

Don't Quit Author Unknown When things go wrong, as they sometimes will, When the road your trudging seems all uphill, When the funds are low and the debts are high, And you want to smile, but you have to sigh, When care is pressing you down a bit Rest if you must, but...

annmarie · annmarie

Hi everyone, I just need to vent today, I suppose. I know there's nothing I can do, but I still worry. He left the house yesterday morning when I was out. I called him when I got back. He said he'd be back in a couple of hours. (I knew he was dying to drink and I don't allow drink in my house.) Anyway,...

debilyn · debilyn

Strange to sit here and not know what to say. It's that way becuz it is all feelings. Have expresssed how much harder it is this time, to find my foundation again. It was so easy for the disease to play me. Let's let him out of the cocoon for awhile, let her have a taste of her soul mate, her lover. Then whe...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

i was in the chatroom yesterday and wanted to update those i spoke with and the rest of you. if you dont know my a and i split a little over three months ago. and i've been doing pretty good. he has not. he is very mentally unstable and went completly to cocaine. that is his choice. but the past month or so he ha...

Becky1 · Becky1

Thanks to all of you for all your good thoughts, prayers. I went to Doc today, finally got in after about 2 months of severe pain. Turns out I was right (I shoulda been a Doctor). I have Trigger Thumb. Funny name for a very painful disorder. Do you KNOW how often and much you us...

Powerless · Powerless

I wanted to check in and let everyone know that things are going well. I am still working my program in my f2f meetings. I have an A average in all of my classes in college and I had an ultrasound on Friday. The baby is a girl. I was hoping for a boy, but His Will not mine. Now I...

Phil · Phil

Fears are the greatest enemy of our individual potential. They keep us in place in our lives and stop us from being everything we could be. Everyone knows how it feels to be afraid. To be afraid is a normal, human characteristic. In fact, the more you develop your intelligence, the more things you have t...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello Friends, Yesterday was our school's home coming dance....my daughter went and she looked lovely....she had no father there to tell her how beautiful she was...she did however have a mom..me...she cried a little she wanted her dad....my heart broke.....my son did not go..he just doesn'...

Elizabeth M · Elizabeth M

I always knew this day would come...After 5 glorious weeks of responsible drinking by my AH he disappeared for 6 hours last night....not so bad compared to others but heartbreaking for me...I so enjoyed the last few weeks..it was so relaxing to have him home on time ..like a huge weight had been...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

"Unwritten" I am unwritten, can't read my mind, I'm undefined I'm just beginning, the pen's in my hand, ending unplanned Staring at the blank page before you Open up the dirty window Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find Reaching for something in the distance ...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

My ex has been here all weekend (my choice) and tonight I told him he had to go home. I know a lot of this is a control issue and I'm worried that the path I am going down is going to lead me to get sucked back in. Is it possible to keep the good (him helping out with the kids and around my house and the physical stuf...

barisax · barisax

Well, I am pretty sure there will be one... both of us pretty busy with stuff so it may be 2-3 weeks. It was a good time, I met some of her friends which I think all of us acknowledged without saying so, was her way of getting a "second opinion" of me.. LOL. It IS unfamiliar territory to have someone o...

DoN4me · DoN4me

It has been a few peaceful weeks with no chaos in my life. I have to admit it has been a wonderful break. The last few days for whatever reason I haven't been able to get my A off my mind. I kept feeling like I should call down there, but didn't. When I hear a knock at my door and the neighbo...

rtexas · rtexas

((((Everyone)))) Let me start out by saying to all those who have followed my saga and kept us in their prayers. Although my AW is still pissed to no end at me, we (thank HP) didn't have any chaos last night. She said she went to the rehab clinic yesterday to talk with thier councelors. T...

barisax · barisax

This weekend I am going to go on a second date with a very nice lady. I haven't yet decided if this is a big deal or not... for most people I guess it wouldn't be. I wear my disgust for the human "mating ritual" on my sleeve. I always hold out for someone I can just "be real" with, and as you might expect, that mak...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Hi all, I had the ultrasound on Friday and then they gave me a mamogram after all. They are pretty sure that it is benign, but still not sure, so I am having a biopsy on Friday. So that is the update on my lump. And might I add that we should do self checks to help find lumps early! Yours in recover...

athena12 · athena12

My mom passed away on Tuesday. I was glad I got to say good bye and tell her I love her 10 minutes before it happened. She went into the hospital a month ago. She had 3 years after my alcoholic father died, but our family is pretty wounded, so I can't say she really had us to comfort her.&n...

maresie2 · maresie2

I am normally Ms Super dooper people pleaser martyr at work and in most social situations. This issue with the A's mother has been difficult. I have to say this normally I would be in there, hypereactive, fixing, trying to fix, taking care of everyone but me. This time I have stayed out of it so m...

annmarie · annmarie

I wondered why is my Abf suddenly more nasty than usual. It just seems to get worse everyday lately. I think he has an idea I'm thinking about leaving him. Is this fear really, showing itself as anger? Or does he really find me to be as awful as he says. I can't understand, because he seems to change so m...

serendipity · serendipity

i am going to disney on the 21st of october (florida) and staying for a week. does anyone know of any meetings in the area? or where i could get a schedual or where i would be getting a schedual for? like would it be orlando, or called something else? any info greatly apperciated....i'm going with my mom.....

Busbe · Busbe

I dont know where to start with this, someone I know will ask me for sure if I would like some cheese with my whine. My husband who took a short job in southern Michigan for 3 to 6 mos which landed him about 1 1/2 hrs from his A family went to see them yesterday. I was hoping he wouldnt open that keg of...

kicky · kicky

It's finally hit my A that I'm serious about him choosing rehab or moving out and I haven't shown signs of waivering. He wanted to "talk" last night, but I told him I prefer to talk about things when he was sober. (Cause of course he had been at the bar, after work, for 3 hours) So, thi...

arty · arty

Hi after spending the last few hours reading all the other posts i realised i was in the right place. I had tears in my eyes through most of it as i saw similarities in my life in so many of them... I am engaged and supposed to get married next year. before my A proposed to me hes was sober for just under a mo...

Rita G · Rita G

As I just read Rtexas' last post - it made my decision final that I needed to post this. So, first - Thanks Rtexas for your bravery and your post. Ok - here goes. Have you ever wondered about that point at which the obsession takes over and a "normal" person becomes an addict? It ha...

be4yourii · be4yourii

I just wanted to thank everyone who was in the chat room last night and listened to me. You guys really helped me get through a rough night. i also wanted to let you all know what happened after he came home. . . i'm pretty sure he didn't go to the bar, but he wouldn't give me a straight answer so maybe he...

lin0606 · lin0606

Life has been dealing my husband some real blows in the last little while. His mother died in early August. Since the death he has been finding out some very disturbing things about his sister, who had been living with her and looking after her. There is a lot of money missing, for instance ten thous...

Christy · Christy

I think whoever wrote this must have been in Alanon

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Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((((((Good morning family))))))))), It's a glorious day today! The

is coming up, the leaves are turning their brilliant colors and it's chilly! A perfect fall today. I am feeling much better today than I was yesterday. Today is a Piper, Pumpkin and Puppy Day! Hubb...

shadow1 · shadow1

HI everyone, Sharon, (Angel123) asked me to post that her computer is down. It totally fried

. So she won't be available for a while. She will try and get to her son's computer to read her email but that is the best she can do for now. I am praying that HP will provide for her and she will be able...

maresie2 · maresie2

Through this long saga of the A's mother moving I have been praying to see the moments of recovery. I see them. Apparently the new husband asked the A to move to wherever they live. He is considering it. Before I have to say this I would be mortified he did not consid...

greta · greta

Things have been kind of topsy turvey the last couple of days. My brother has lung cancer, and for the last 6-8 weeks has gone thru testing. The results have been that it was contained to the left lung and that they would remove the lung. Now out of the blue we have found out that the tes...

maresie2 · maresie2

I swear if I ever ever get into another relationship before I commit I want to look at the family issues. As you all know the As mother decided to get married a few weeks ago. Quite out of the blue. Before then she had been the penltimate widow. She never dated anyone. She went to so...

Jill · Jill

Lilms posted about its importance, but I don't really understand it. It feels like I am embarassed or ashamed to need help. I'm proud I attend alanon and am taking care of myself in that manner. I am more grown up than to tell someone else's story or out them, but it feels like the "before" behavior. Can an...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

I remember reading from one of our member's "Why do we have to be nice?" Well, dearest, just to prove that I chew my tounge off from biting it.... So yesterday I talked to my neurologist at my counselor's encouragment. Even though the migranes had gotten better they still hadn't gone...

Jennifer · Jennifer

Good Morning (((Everyone))) I've been thinking about this concept for a while now and another post brought it to the front of my mind again. I grew up with I guess what you would call hippie parents, not addicts or alcoholics but they definitely took advantage of the times and nothing was hi...

purplebutterfly · purplebutterfly

My A while I was online stated to be that my sponsor was past her bed time. My A doesnt like me talking to my sponsor. Is actually really jelous of me talking to my sponsor. Any suggestions.

sld488 · sld488

Would someone explain to me the meaning or definition of the letters H.A.L.T. Thank you!

ZiggyDoodles · ZiggyDoodles

I am amazed with all the progress in recovery I have been making. I was able to tell my AH it was time to end it last January. Through recovery, I was able to tell him to go when it got to a point that I was no longer willing to tolerate with relative ease. I didn't have to mean about it.&nbs...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((((((Family)))))))), Good morning. I've been struggling a bit with a few things. Nothing major, but things that have been just causing me a bit of angst. Kind of stuck, not moving foward, etc. Well I went to do my daily mediation reading from Hazelden this mor...

hersh · hersh

((((Everyone))) After being woken up lastnight by drunk AH and listening to his arrogance and hate words (I sat up but then just went to bed), I woke up this morning and told him goodbye when I left. I asked him if he remembered what happened lastnight. He said, "no, was I messing with you...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

(((Family))) Thanks to all who wrote in their thoughts and feelings to my post on my marriage proposal. I took in each of your points and gave all my concerns, hopes, and dreams to HP. My family has been suprisingly supportive and just basically said all they want is our happiness.&nbs...

annmarie · annmarie

Hi everyone, my Abf's friend comes out of rehab next week. He's trouble and my instincts tell me to keep well away from him. But seems he's this great buddy, and he will be around. I have to get used to it! Anyway, I've been really nervous about this for the past few weeks and have not handled it very well. I'...

rtexas · rtexas

(((((((Everyone)))))))) You know.... I struggled so much after getting here about if to stay or go or what? I got some wonderful advise about giving it time and when it's right.... I will know. Well, needless to say we had a really bad weekend. I won't go into great detail, but she was...

bluegrassgal · bluegrassgal

My husband died of a brain tumor about 7 years ago. His emotions were out of control due to the tumor and meds he was on. A lot of the time he was unreasonable. I suffered a lot of panic attacks that seemed vaguely familiar. Once, in particular he was haranguing me about the venetian blinds. I started to pan...

rosedawn · rosedawn

Hi im Dawn, Ive been coming here for 3 yrs now,without this room i dont know how i would handle this situation.Well anyways my sister had a stroke,alot of brain damage and cant walk or move arm etc......But the warning signs were there her pressure was high she had light flashes in her eyes.I offered h...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Lessons Learned (Preview) I’m searching for some ES&H on letting go. I don’t do it very well and have struggled with it for a while. I did finally let someone go that I thought was out of my life for good. It took a long time for me to do this but I finally got to the point that I could say to myself it is finished. I have felt tha...	shadow1	3	493	Oct 17, 2006 by notsonew1111
	CONFUSED.COM (Preview) ((((((((((((ROOMIES))))))))))) This has been a difficult week for me. For my emotional wellbeing. I have not been to f2f for last two weeks. This is has become a pattern for me. I jump wholeheartedly into my programme. Then when I struggle with something, I pull back from it. So...	ally	6	488	Oct 17, 2006 by mac57
	Jerry F (Preview) (((((((((Jerry F)))))))), Just wanted to make sure you and your family are safe in Hawaii. Hope you came through it okay. Let us know. Sending prayers your way. Live strong, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty	Karilynn	2	521	Oct 17, 2006 by DanaAngel
	His Fault/My Fault??? (Preview) Well, as some of you know, I had a major meltdown last week, and punched (many times) my freshly painted kitchen wall. That was on Sat., last week. It left a hole, not real big, but knuckle sized. My walls are painted green, so the white drywall really showed thru. And i...	Becky1	7	575	Oct 17, 2006 by Jerry F
	My part in things.... (Preview) ((((((Everyone)))))) After giving it some thought about my part in the things going on in my life (thank you Christy ) I've come to a few conclusions... the biggest one is the day of my last post I was finding it very easy to blame my A. I spoke the truth, I am in many ways the way I am because...	Lunamoth	4	498	Oct 17, 2006 by Jerry F
	Compromising with the A (Preview) (((Hello Group))) I have learned that just because an A gets sober doesn't mean that everything is magically changed. My A still struggles with old behavior patterns. He's stubborn and strong willed. He gets into these power struggles with me or with other people over issues...	twinmom2	2	475	Oct 17, 2006 by Jerry F
	Recovery High Horse (Preview) Someone posted last week about A's and druggies getting on a moral high horse or thinking they know better what to do in all situations etc. I just wanted to revisit that. My A last weekend took the kids to the beach (first time he's been alone with them anywhere ever that I can remember) and...	carolinagirl	3	542	Oct 17, 2006 by jaja
	Still In Love With the X? (Preview) After looking at my previous post, I thought maybe I should bring this topic up. It's not something I discuss in my normal circle at all. In part because it just doesn't come up, but also because I don't want to be chided for not being able to let go. I have been divorced longer than I was married... for...	barisax	9	693	Oct 17, 2006 by Jerry F
	lyrics on letting go (Preview) this song really touches me with my current situation. its called let him fly by jessica simpson. Ain't no talkin to this man Ain't no pretty other side Ain't no way to understand the stupid words of pride It would take an acrobat, and I already tried all that so I'm gonna let him fly Things can...	notsonew1111	1	374	Oct 17, 2006 by Becky1
	Coping With Triggers (Preview) Dear Roomies, For as long as I can remember, I have been very afraid of things that I can't control (lightening storms, illness, and war). I worried about storms, illness, and war ALOT as a kid. I can see now that I may have been doing this as a way of expressing how worried I was about how out of control...	BlueCloud	2	570	Oct 17, 2006 by Jerry F
	In Limbo.... (Preview) (((Hi everyone))) Well I did get away for Friday and Saturday night. I almost changed my mind at the last minute, got really sad Friday at work and canceled the reservations where I was going to go. I just wanted to be home, whether AH was drunk or not, there or not, just wanted to pine away...	hersh	3	438	Oct 17, 2006 by Jerry F
	Feelings And Surrender (Preview) *The Language of Letting Go. Feelings and Surrender* Surrendering is a highly personal and spiritual experience. Surrender is not something we can do in our heads. It is not something we can force or control by willpower. It is something we experience. Acceptance, or surrender, is not a ti...	Phil	7	727	Oct 17, 2006 by Phil
	Comfort and Chaos (Preview) ((((Everyone)))) Today I find myself thinking about how far out of my comfort zone I am in putting a big boundry in place. Has it really been that long ago that I stuck to what was right, just because it was the right thing to do? The answer of course is yes, it's been a long time. I have s...	rtexas	4	428	Oct 17, 2006 by just me
	Old habits hard to break (Preview) ((((Everyone)))) For those wondering if the A and I went on our date... yes we did. It is an unusual place. Our city is a little bit of everything. To the east and south is flat farmland, and to the west is hills. In the middle of those hills is a beautiful lake. For those of y...	rtexas	8	443	Oct 17, 2006 by rtexas
	long vent (Preview) I'm letting it all out tonight, hope you all don't mind. My mother is dieing. She is all but gone now. My father who recently had a heart attack and open heart surgery is determined to keep her home. I look at her and my heart is just is so full of sadness. Last night...	Lunamoth	6	421	Oct 17, 2006 by Mindy
	For Those That Are Having A rough Time...And Are Struggling.. (Preview) Don't Quit Author Unknown When things go wrong, as they sometimes will, When the road your trudging seems all uphill, When the funds are low and the debts are high, And you want to smile, but you have to sigh, When care is pressing you down a bit Rest if you must, but...	Phil	4	512	Oct 17, 2006 by carolinagirl
	he stayed away (Preview) Hi everyone, I just need to vent today, I suppose. I know there's nothing I can do, but I still worry. He left the house yesterday morning when I was out. I called him when I got back. He said he'd be back in a couple of hours. (I knew he was dying to drink and I don't allow drink in my house.) Anyway,...	annmarie	2	348	Oct 17, 2006 by hersh
	It hurts (Preview) Strange to sit here and not know what to say. It's that way becuz it is all feelings. Have expresssed how much harder it is this time, to find my foundation again. It was so easy for the disease to play me. Let's let him out of the cocoon for awhile, let her have a taste of her soul mate, her lover. Then whe...	debilyn	13	1342	Oct 17, 2006 by hersh
	my update and letting go (Preview) i was in the chatroom yesterday and wanted to update those i spoke with and the rest of you. if you dont know my a and i split a little over three months ago. and i've been doing pretty good. he has not. he is very mentally unstable and went completly to cocaine. that is his choice. but the past month or so he ha...	notsonew1111	4	536	Oct 17, 2006 by erin in ny
	Update on My Hand Pain (Preview) Thanks to all of you for all your good thoughts, prayers. I went to Doc today, finally got in after about 2 months of severe pain. Turns out I was right (I shoulda been a Doctor). I have Trigger Thumb. Funny name for a very painful disorder. Do you KNOW how often and much you us...	Becky1	4	521	Oct 17, 2006 by kingston
	It's a girl!!! (Preview) I wanted to check in and let everyone know that things are going well. I am still working my program in my f2f meetings. I have an A average in all of my classes in college and I had an ultrasound on Friday. The baby is a girl. I was hoping for a boy, but His Will not mine. Now I...	Powerless	9	430	Oct 17, 2006 by Karilynn
	The Enemy Within (Preview) Fears are the greatest enemy of our individual potential. They keep us in place in our lives and stop us from being everything we could be. Everyone knows how it feels to be afraid. To be afraid is a normal, human characteristic. In fact, the more you develop your intelligence, the more things you have t...	Phil	5	579	Oct 17, 2006 by annmarie
	Trying to Maintain (Preview) Hello Friends, Yesterday was our school's home coming dance....my daughter went and she looked lovely....she had no father there to tell her how beautiful she was...she did however have a mom..me...she cried a little she wanted her dad....my heart broke.....my son did not go..he just doesn'...	Andrea12	6	468	Oct 17, 2006 by mel123
	A Test (Preview) I always knew this day would come...After 5 glorious weeks of responsible drinking by my AH he disappeared for 6 hours last night....not so bad compared to others but heartbreaking for me...I so enjoyed the last few weeks..it was so relaxing to have him home on time ..like a huge weight had been...	Elizabeth M	1	376	Oct 16, 2006 by Lunamoth
	More lyrics... (Preview) "Unwritten" I am unwritten, can't read my mind, I'm undefined I'm just beginning, the pen's in my hand, ending unplanned Staring at the blank page before you Open up the dirty window Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find Reaching for something in the distance ...	carolinagirl	0	318	Oct 16, 2006 by carolinagirl
	Slippin (Preview) My ex has been here all weekend (my choice) and tonight I told him he had to go home. I know a lot of this is a control issue and I'm worried that the path I am going down is going to lead me to get sucked back in. Is it possible to keep the good (him helping out with the kids and around my house and the physical stuf...	carolinagirl	5	401	Oct 16, 2006 by carolinagirl
	Third Date? (Preview) Well, I am pretty sure there will be one... both of us pretty busy with stuff so it may be 2-3 weeks. It was a good time, I met some of her friends which I think all of us acknowledged without saying so, was her way of getting a "second opinion" of me.. LOL. It IS unfamiliar territory to have someone o...	barisax	1	348	Oct 16, 2006 by lmt123
	Letter from A (Preview) It has been a few peaceful weeks with no chaos in my life. I have to admit it has been a wonderful break. The last few days for whatever reason I haven't been able to get my A off my mind. I kept feeling like I should call down there, but didn't. When I hear a knock at my door and the neighbo...	DoN4me	1	443	Oct 16, 2006 by lin0606
	Worried about disapointing (Preview) ((((Everyone)))) Let me start out by saying to all those who have followed my saga and kept us in their prayers. Although my AW is still pissed to no end at me, we (thank HP) didn't have any chaos last night. She said she went to the rehab clinic yesterday to talk with thier councelors. T...	rtexas	12	501	Oct 16, 2006 by twinmom2
	Second Date (Preview) This weekend I am going to go on a second date with a very nice lady. I haven't yet decided if this is a big deal or not... for most people I guess it wouldn't be. I wear my disgust for the human "mating ritual" on my sleeve. I always hold out for someone I can just "be real" with, and as you might expect, that mak...	barisax	7	380	Oct 16, 2006 by Jeannie
	Had the UltraSound (Preview) Hi all, I had the ultrasound on Friday and then they gave me a mamogram after all. They are pretty sure that it is benign, but still not sure, so I am having a biopsy on Friday. So that is the update on my lump. And might I add that we should do self checks to help find lumps early! Yours in recover...	Dolphin123	12	479	Oct 16, 2006 by Jeannie
	my Mom (Preview) My mom passed away on Tuesday. I was glad I got to say good bye and tell her I love her 10 minutes before it happened. She went into the hospital a month ago. She had 3 years after my alcoholic father died, but our family is pretty wounded, so I can't say she really had us to comfort her.&n...	athena12	7	475	Oct 16, 2006 by athena12
	the family stuff (Preview) I am normally Ms Super dooper people pleaser martyr at work and in most social situations. This issue with the A's mother has been difficult. I have to say this normally I would be in there, hypereactive, fixing, trying to fix, taking care of everyone but me. This time I have stayed out of it so m...	maresie2	2	346	Oct 16, 2006 by twinmom2
	trying to understand the madness (Preview) I wondered why is my Abf suddenly more nasty than usual. It just seems to get worse everyday lately. I think he has an idea I'm thinking about leaving him. Is this fear really, showing itself as anger? Or does he really find me to be as awful as he says. I can't understand, because he seems to change so m...	annmarie	4	410	Oct 16, 2006 by annmarie
	disney anyone? (Preview) i am going to disney on the 21st of october (florida) and staying for a week. does anyone know of any meetings in the area? or where i could get a schedual or where i would be getting a schedual for? like would it be orlando, or called something else? any info greatly apperciated....i'm going with my mom.....	serendipity	5	4540	Oct 16, 2006 by Barbara
	Inlaw worries (Preview) I dont know where to start with this, someone I know will ask me for sure if I would like some cheese with my whine. My husband who took a short job in southern Michigan for 3 to 6 mos which landed him about 1 1/2 hrs from his A family went to see them yesterday. I was hoping he wouldnt open that keg of...	Busbe	3	348	Oct 15, 2006 by drucilla06
	A started the bargaining (Preview) It's finally hit my A that I'm serious about him choosing rehab or moving out and I haven't shown signs of waivering. He wanted to "talk" last night, but I told him I prefer to talk about things when he was sober. (Cause of course he had been at the bar, after work, for 3 hours) So, thi...	kicky	6	447	Oct 15, 2006 by maresie2
	new here (Preview) Hi after spending the last few hours reading all the other posts i realised i was in the right place. I had tears in my eyes through most of it as i saw similarities in my life in so many of them... I am engaged and supposed to get married next year. before my A proposed to me hes was sober for just under a mo...	arty	6	407	Oct 15, 2006 by lin0606
	Have you ever?? (Preview) As I just read Rtexas' last post - it made my decision final that I needed to post this. So, first - Thanks Rtexas for your bravery and your post. Ok - here goes. Have you ever wondered about that point at which the obsession takes over and a "normal" person becomes an addict? It ha...	Rita G	11	535	Oct 15, 2006 by ZiggyDoodles
	thanks everyone (Preview) I just wanted to thank everyone who was in the chat room last night and listened to me. You guys really helped me get through a rough night. i also wanted to let you all know what happened after he came home. . . i'm pretty sure he didn't go to the bar, but he wouldn't give me a straight answer so maybe he...	be4yourii	1	358	Oct 15, 2006 by ZiggyDoodles
	Send a little comfort our way, please (Preview) Life has been dealing my husband some real blows in the last little while. His mother died in early August. Since the death he has been finding out some very disturbing things about his sister, who had been living with her and looking after her. There is a lot of money missing, for instance ten thous...	lin0606	9	551	Oct 15, 2006 by lin0606
	Daily Motivation (Preview) I think whoever wrote this must have been in Alanon*********************************************************************	Christy	4	666	Oct 15, 2006 by ET
	A Piper, Pumpkin and Puppy Day! (Preview) (((((((((Good morning family))))))))), It's a glorious day today! The is coming up, the leaves are turning their brilliant colors and it's chilly! A perfect fall today. I am feeling much better today than I was yesterday. Today is a Piper, Pumpkin and Puppy Day! Hubb...	Karilynn	10	398	Oct 15, 2006 by leo
	A message from Angel123 (Preview) HI everyone, Sharon, (Angel123) asked me to post that her computer is down. It totally fried. So she won't be available for a while. She will try and get to her son's computer to read her email but that is the best she can do for now. I am praying that HP will provide for her and she will be able...	shadow1	1	659	Oct 14, 2006 by mastiff
	signs of recovery at last (Preview) Through this long saga of the A's mother moving I have been praying to see the moments of recovery. I see them. Apparently the new husband asked the A to move to wherever they live. He is considering it. Before I have to say this I would be mortified he did not consid...	maresie2	1	478	Oct 14, 2006 by athena12
	getting it out (Preview) Things have been kind of topsy turvey the last couple of days. My brother has lung cancer, and for the last 6-8 weeks has gone thru testing. The results have been that it was contained to the left lung and that they would remove the lung. Now out of the blue we have found out that the tes...	greta	4	446	Oct 14, 2006 by purplebutterfly
	detaching by the second (Preview) I swear if I ever ever get into another relationship before I commit I want to look at the family issues. As you all know the As mother decided to get married a few weeks ago. Quite out of the blue. Before then she had been the penltimate widow. She never dated anyone. She went to so...	maresie2	3	488	Oct 14, 2006 by maresie2
	Anonymity question (Preview) Lilms posted about its importance, but I don't really understand it. It feels like I am embarassed or ashamed to need help. I'm proud I attend alanon and am taking care of myself in that manner. I am more grown up than to tell someone else's story or out them, but it feels like the "before" behavior. Can an...	Jill	9	527	Oct 14, 2006 by annah
	Remind me (again) I'm gonna be okay... (Preview) I remember reading from one of our member's "Why do we have to be nice?" Well, dearest, just to prove that I chew my tounge off from biting it.... So yesterday I talked to my neurologist at my counselor's encouragment. Even though the migranes had gotten better they still hadn't gone...	Tiger2006	8	535	Oct 14, 2006 by isabela40
	Survivor guilt? (Preview) Good Morning (((Everyone))) I've been thinking about this concept for a while now and another post brought it to the front of my mind again. I grew up with I guess what you would call hippie parents, not addicts or alcoholics but they definitely took advantage of the times and nothing was hi...	Jennifer	5	498	Oct 14, 2006 by Karilynn
	jelous A (Preview) My A while I was online stated to be that my sponsor was past her bed time. My A doesnt like me talking to my sponsor. Is actually really jelous of me talking to my sponsor. Any suggestions.	purplebutterfly	6	479	Oct 14, 2006 by purplebutterfly
	Definition of H.A.L.T.? (Preview) Would someone explain to me the meaning or definition of the letters H.A.L.T. Thank you!	sld488	4	3670	Oct 13, 2006 by barisax
	Divorce Final Tomorrow. (Preview) I am amazed with all the progress in recovery I have been making. I was able to tell my AH it was time to end it last January. Through recovery, I was able to tell him to go when it got to a point that I was no longer willing to tolerate with relative ease. I didn't have to mean about it.&nbs...	ZiggyDoodles	6	440	Oct 13, 2006 by ZiggyDoodles
	Turning it over to HP (Preview) ((((((((Family)))))))), Good morning. I've been struggling a bit with a few things. Nothing major, but things that have been just causing me a bit of angst. Kind of stuck, not moving foward, etc. Well I went to do my daily mediation reading from Hazelden this mor...	Karilynn	4	385	Oct 13, 2006 by maresie2
	A getaway.... (Preview) ((((Everyone))) After being woken up lastnight by drunk AH and listening to his arrogance and hate words (I sat up but then just went to bed), I woke up this morning and told him goodbye when I left. I asked him if he remembered what happened lastnight. He said, "no, was I messing with you...	hersh	8	371	Oct 13, 2006 by maresie2
	Still here hanging in (Preview) (((Family))) Thanks to all who wrote in their thoughts and feelings to my post on my marriage proposal. I took in each of your points and gave all my concerns, hopes, and dreams to HP. My family has been suprisingly supportive and just basically said all they want is our happiness.&nbs...	twinmom2	3	427	Oct 13, 2006 by maresie2
	I've had just about enough (Preview) Hi everyone, my Abf's friend comes out of rehab next week. He's trouble and my instincts tell me to keep well away from him. But seems he's this great buddy, and he will be around. I have to get used to it! Anyway, I've been really nervous about this for the past few weeks and have not handled it very well. I'...	annmarie	5	559	Oct 13, 2006 by maresie2
	My bottom... (Preview) (((((((Everyone)))))))) You know.... I struggled so much after getting here about if to stay or go or what? I got some wonderful advise about giving it time and when it's right.... I will know. Well, needless to say we had a really bad weekend. I won't go into great detail, but she was...	rtexas	15	641	Oct 13, 2006 by maresie2
	flahsbacks (Preview) My husband died of a brain tumor about 7 years ago. His emotions were out of control due to the tumor and meds he was on. A lot of the time he was unreasonable. I suffered a lot of panic attacks that seemed vaguely familiar. Once, in particular he was haranguing me about the venetian blinds. I started to pan...	bluegrassgal	2	401	Oct 13, 2006 by just me
	hard times (Preview) Hi im Dawn, Ive been coming here for 3 yrs now,without this room i dont know how i would handle this situation.Well anyways my sister had a stroke,alot of brain damage and cant walk or move arm etc......But the warning signs were there her pressure was high she had light flashes in her eyes.I offered h...	rosedawn	4	493	Oct 13, 2006 by just me
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.