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"EXPECTATIONS"
(Preview)
(((((((((((Guy))))))))))) Was surfing and came across some quotes::::: Anna Quindlen: It's important to remember that feminism is no longer a group of organizations or leaders. It's the expectations that parents have for their daughters, and their sons, too. It's the way we talk about and treat...
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ally
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1
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313
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Pepi is back home now
(Preview)
Pepi my dog was found at the pound She was a few blocks away but she must have been moving all the time for the whole 24 plus hours she was gone. I searched high and low for her. I didn't sleep for two days. She is absolutely fine and chomping on a bone at home
Thanks for all your prayers it meant a great deal to...
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maresie2
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6
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335
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The healthy self...
(Preview)
I thought this needed it's own string, feel free to add! OK I'm gonna give this a shot: Ease in making everyday decisions Assumes responsibility for own actions and life Not afraid to speak up for self or disagree with others Initiating projects and finishing what you start Nurtures self by self care a...
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carolinagirl
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3
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376
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Just for the record....
(Preview)
((((((((Family)))))))))), In reference to Becky's post about Keith Urban and Diva going ga-ga over Johnny Depp. Allow me to set the record straight. While I might go a bit nuts at a football game: GO USC, GO EAGLES, I assure you I would never get crazy. (Just don't talk to my friends Joanne & Kath...
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Karilynn
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23
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1763
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Group conscious meeting
(Preview)
I have a question about the rules for a group conscious meeting. when you have one and then have the vote does majority rule. that is my question> thanks bigh
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bigh
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6
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2510
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Ending it
(Preview)
I don't know how to cut ties with my boyfriend. I don't even necessarily want to never speak with him again, but I WOULD like him to move out. I've gotten to the point where he and his drinking just annoy me to death and if he does stay it is going to get worse until I have some kind of blow up and say really mean t...
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summergrl83
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5
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404
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Why is the elephant invisible?
(Preview)
The addict is in complete control of the group. Like a magician they make everyone look over here and pull the trick off over there. The group is entertained and happy. But I see all the slight of hand. I hear the hallow ring in every promise uttered from the addicts lips. I am not happy or entertained. I am...
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Cheryl28659
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8
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569
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My father, the Alcoholic
(Preview)
I haven't spoken to my father in a year. He is very disrespectful to me in front of my daughter and can go into rages. I severed the relationship and have no desire to have a relationship with him. He also participates in cat calls while I am in his presence. I always denied how I felt when around him. Recent...
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kissers
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2
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318
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I found this interesting, this was me when I first came here!
(Preview)
Dependent Personality Disorder Symptoms This personality disorder is characterized by a long-standing need for the person to be taken care of and a fear of being abandoned or separated from important individuals in his or her life. This pervasive fear leads to "clinging behavior" and...
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carolinagirl
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9
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536
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Update on Mom's House
(Preview)
As most of you know I lost my mom last year and I just wanted to share with you the following....(Art is Dad, Helen is Mom) 50 years ago this year, Art and Helen started looking for a house. Art wanted to get Helen and thier three children (I wasn't even thought of yet LOL) settled into a home before he depl...
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marmare
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4
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498
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That alcoholic radar
(Preview)
Hi Alanoners, It happens time and time again. Late this summer after my surgeries and having my AHsober tell me he didn't feel anything compassion for me, I said enough is enough. I am not going to make an effort to talk to him, cooperate, or call him about our sons. So of course he shows up for a tournamen...
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nmike
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5
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578
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THANK GAWD FOR MY SENSE OF HUMOUR:LOL
(Preview)
(((((((((((((Yo Roomies)))))))))))) I have been having a "pure dead crappy week". My life sucks, I am hopeless, useless, a cody, a pain in the ass, and I'm writing this right now, listening to a song, and laughing...lol Well,...
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ally
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3
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595
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Can Anyone Help Me Get Into the Chatroom?
(Preview)
Help! I had a harddrive breakdown and now I can't get on in the chatroom! My ex-bf's nephew was very nice in that he completely rewrote my bios(which of course I don't understand) and when I try to get into the room it says it wants to add "ActiveX" to my computer, then when I try to allow it to it s...
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jonibaloni21
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2
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418
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one year later...
(Preview)
i'm starting to see the chaos that was my life on a whole new level. I hope, dear god, i hope i never become that person again. it was pain, on top of more pain, etc. i had no tools to cope...i drank. i'm here now, one year later, feeling great in my sobriety. it works if you work it. and yes, i'm worth it. ...
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CAM0914
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0
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315
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Let me out of this maze that is my head
(Preview)
have you ever felt like you were trying to solve a puzzle but you didn't quite have all the information? Well, that's how I have been feeling. It has even led to panic attacks. The answer to the puzzle is I need to have more faith in myself. I need to have confidence in me and my own abilities. So, if I alread...
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seekingserenity
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2
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1660
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letter to my MIL (long but good)
(Preview)
Well, thanks for saying that, I guess its better to step away than to say thing that cant be unsaid J Anyway, I know he is your son and you love him and want him to have everything he wants but I also want C to grow up healthy and Im not really sure at this point what is the best thing. I have been thinking abo...
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carolinagirl
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2
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480
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Maresie any word about the dog?
(Preview)
Has the dog come home yet? Have you found her?
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carolinagirl
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7
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417
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One thing said to me
(Preview)
By my A ex, is one of the reasons we broke up was that she feel like I was there for her, when she decided to quit drinking. I have stood beside her through everything we have done toegther and all her decisions, I dont know how else to show her that I am still there for her no matter what happens... ~ Mr. Clingy...
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jrl
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4
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428
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realizations
(Preview)
I wrote this last night....... This may not make sense or seem rational because I am typing as I am thinking and I have lots running through my head about this....... I am a big fan of Law & Order: SVU. I just the watched episode about the A mother who drank vodka and it talked about the feelings of child...
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Lanchas
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4
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470
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Sociopathic tenddencies
(Preview)
the A's alcoholism and drug addiction has not progressed to the phase where he is a sociopath.
When my dog went missing on Monday I spoke to him. His response to the situation which had me very very distressed was to try to con money out of me.
I think I have really resisted seing him as a sociopath for a...
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maresie2
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4
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621
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QOD??
(Preview)
Haven't seen you online for a while?? Maybe I missed her posts?? Hope you are OK hon! Kim
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Kim65
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4
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260
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please pray for me
(Preview)
My big lab mix got out last night and after hours of searching is no where to be seen. I am desolate and waiting for the animal shelters to open. The A offered to help if I paid him!!! That's it for me.
I feel absolutely alone, abandoned and without resources. Of course I have my own two feet. My dogs got out...
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maresie2
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11
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593
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Long Time No See
(Preview)
Hi All, Haven't been around but have still been checking out the board now and again. Since hubby cleared up 7 year old outstanding warrants in Rhode Island back in July things have been going very smoothly. He has been on the sober path again. Even with my bankruptcy 3 years ago I was able to secure a m...
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lebe27
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7
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421
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detatching from family members
(Preview)
Hi everyone, It's been a while since I've posted. I've just been reading posts. I've been working very hard at detatching from people who are affected by the disease of alcoholism, namely my family members. As I get better, which is great, I can see how the illness affects them with greater clarity. I h...
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annmarie
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3
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582
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New Member
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, I've never joined a message board for ANYTHING, let alone for advice and community, so please bear with me if I'm way off on etiquette, etc. In addition, if you have anything to say, thats why I'm here! So, good or bad, critical or sympathetic, let it flow. I feel like I'm in a corner, but k...
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Intrepid
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17
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521
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mspw on break
(Preview)
Hi all, I have been traveling for a week, and missing you all so much that I actually paid Tmobile to get online for a day! rofl. Will be back next week, but wanted to check in. You will never know, but I am suggesting here and now that you helped me more than you know to deal with family visits with a g...
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wp
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4
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384
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Living in fear
(Preview)
I have lived in fear my entire life. Intense fear of the next intoxicated belligerent episode. Will it be loud? Will it last long? Will anyone be physically injured? Will someone leave mad? Will it be me? For many years it was my mother who brought this chaos to my life. And I thought I had fixed that part o...
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Cheryl28659
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7
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532
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Feeling of impending doom
(Preview)
Since A will be out in a week, I have been getting that feeling of impending doom lately I hear the star wars darth vader entering the room music...LOL. I guess I haven't given much thought to him and his visitation of our son since it hasn't been a concern the past few months but I know it's going to hit the...
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carolinagirl
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12
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1161
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imending doom? me too
(Preview)
One more post before my self imposed break, LOL Wow, was interesting to see that topic when I came here today to post about my son. I posted seperately because carolinagirl at least has something to pin it on. I got the tail, I got the blindfold, but I have no clue where this jackass is. lol Between my fe...
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bobump
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6
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520
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something new I learned yesterday
(Preview)
confusion can be a good thing - never thought of that!! confusion can mean I am not ready or it is not the right time for this issue/plan confusion can keep us from acting until we are calm and sure trying to make sane decisions/plans in a A house of insanity,can require lots of time so embrace the confusi...
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ddub
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1
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370
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And you all thought the scrubbing floor thougths were done! Hehe nope
(Preview)
Hi all, I think I have a new sickness, I can't stop thinking alanon when I clean. Ummm is there a 12 step program for that. Ok so the new thought. Last night after I took a shower. I noticed that my hands were really dry. Hmmm I spent quite a bit of time with bleach and pinesole and washing dishes no wonder they...
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Mandy123
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4
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419
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hi My sis and bros
(Preview)
I apologise for not being here. Please feel free to email me privately if you feel a need. Have made a major decision to finish the legal sep and divorce my AH. He actually died after his brain surgery anyway. It is more apparent than ever. We just never know how horrible things can go wrong in this world....
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debilyn
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5
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557
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my son an alateen speaker ? and a chance to work my program?
(Preview)
I was going to take a break from MIP but I just had to post this. So, 2 weeks ago, my son and I had it out a little bit when I indirectly expressed my frustration with him not having gone to Alateen the for a bit. He goes, comes out of the meeting, comes out w/ an commitment to read the preamble at the individual a...
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bobump
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7
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1051
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Feeling Alone
(Preview)
The last few weeks have been some of the hardest of my life. I found out I was pregnant (by my A boyfriend) and decided not to go through with the pregnancy. It was not a very hard decision for me, this is a terrible time in my life for a child, not to mention I am not sure I want to stay with my boyfriend and defin...
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summergrl83
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6
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580
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re; being honest
(Preview)
I have just dealt with my student's work and been as positive as I can be. I have also provided direction and not just sent back the comments. I feel happy about my level of supervision and the detachment involved in it. On an another level, I have so much stress in my life at the moment, that I feel overwhel...
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maire rua
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5
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385
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When does the Darkness End
(Preview)
Hello Friends, Been living in a state of depression these past few months.....alot of questions, I have questioned about everything in my life....Still don't have many answers, however things seem were heading in a better direction.... Zach is playing football again, daughter is starting to lau...
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Andrea12
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12
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610
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WHAT TRIGGERS THE NEGATIVE FEELINGS WITHIN US????
(Preview)
(((((((((((((((Guys))))))))))))))))))) My last post was full of "positive" thoughts and feelings. And guess what, WHY do I know It's not going to last. WHY, can I not allow myself to be happy. The last three days have been horrible for me. You all know I had a friend come up from England. I...
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ally
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11
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643
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Emotional Exhaustion?
(Preview)
Some say I have found my bottom, believe me it's not pretty down here. I have been in program just under three years. During that time I was asked to start a new meeting at our church, which after a year is doing well. I have been going to as many functions as I can, retreats, AA weekend functions and at tim...
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Mobirdie
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8
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1880
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hitting bottom
(Preview)
It seems like the A is finally hitting a bottom he can't find a way out of. His current landlord is tired of his tantrum and his denial and his insistence that money is coming some day. She has issued him an order to get out. He insists he is staying. He refuses point blank to go to his uncles who would take him...
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maresie2
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7
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610
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35 days and not counting
(Preview)
The good run ended last night after 34.8 days. He supposedly went to an AA meeting at 7 pm, got home a little after 8. Football game on TV at 8:15. Daughter and I went to bed at 8:30 after busy weekend. Heard him go out to his car (red flag), comes back in house and I hear cough/crack of can opening. I get up and g...
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babysteps
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7
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877
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At the End of my Rope
(Preview)
I am newly married, and my new husband is an alcoholic... I knew that he drank occasionally when we got married but i had no idea how bad his drinking was until we moved in together. I believe alcoholism is an illness and i dont believe in leaving someone just because they are sick, but i honestly dont kno...
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Sandy34
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6
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6062
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Are you a "Helper" too?
(Preview)
So in our marriage class we did a personality survey and I discovered I am of the Helper Type. Of the traits described, it said that my type can be viewed as a pushover, that I need to learn to be more aware of my needs, how to say "no", to be more willing to confront, to share all of who I am, and to a...
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Loupiness
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8
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715
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Ripped And Torn
(Preview)
Hi to all.. very first time here to this site and I have read some of the postings and decided to post my own.. I'll try and keep my story short.. I am in a relationship with a recovering alcoholic.. (long distance relationship) clean and sober for 18 months.. I am clean and sober in support of my Loved one....
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RippedNTorn
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8
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550
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One week and One day..
(Preview)
I have 8 more days until the A is released back into society I would love to say that it's no big deal, etc. etc. but as most of us know he will probably show up in my vicinity or be calling wanting this that and the other. His mom said she has found a lady who can help him with a place to stay (several hours from m...
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carolinagirl
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3
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437
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He went past my boundary. I am so mad.
(Preview)
This was his weekend to come and see the kids. I had told him that I was going to go out with a friend of mine. So when he walked in the door he reaked of vodka. It was SO nasty and he denied it. I told him in front of the kids (my bad) that he crossed my boundaries and he would need to leave and drive four hours back....
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Friendofyours
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8
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698
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Is this healthy?
(Preview)
I'd love some feedback on this decision I've made. I'll keep it short and sweet. My sister has always been a mean drunk. WE live on different sides of the continent and have kept in touch over the phone, infrequent visits and letters. Our relationship has always been strained. My Mom thinks her nastyne...
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natbrat
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6
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534
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HAPPY FIRST DAY OF FALL!
(Preview)
((((((Family))))))))), Just wanted to take a moment to wish all of you (who are in the right hemisphere) HAPPY FIRST DAY OF FALL! This can only mean one thing: THE GREAT PUMPKIN IS COMING NEXT MONTH! I'm in the North East, and the leaves are starting to turn, the apples are getting ripe (suppose to be on...
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Karilynn
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6
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596
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regrouping
(Preview)
I'm finally finally finally in regroup mode. I am able to pay down some of my bills (I will be years paying them). I am looking to a time when I can save and move on. I am looking at what my options are on many many levels. I feel more positive than I have for a long time. I am going tomorrow to get my hair cut and do...
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maresie2
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3
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296
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Is there hope in recovery
(Preview)
Just got off the phone with my ex AW. Yesterday was her birthday and my adult children and myself did not call her. Her drinking has interfered with our lives to the extent that we have decided on the tough love route. Get treatment and we will be there, until then we can't be there for you. I think she mi...
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TheArtOf
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14
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566
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Hey Everyone
(Preview)
Hurray I have cable! Glad to be back! Thanks for the replies to my quick update a while ago. Continuation ... I'm happy. Thinga are all coming together, I was declared legally blind, opening up all kinds of opportunities for me and releasing alot of stress over medical bills and financial issues. On th...
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Jennifer
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5
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382
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How many alcoholics does it take?
(Preview)
I am a 43 year old, child of an alcoholc mother and MIA father. I cut off contact with my mother over 10 years ago. Her drinking left me twisted in knotts inside. All the lies, promises and just plain insanity, was just to much. I want a peacful life. With out the caos. But I must be doing something worng. Bec...
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Cheryl28659
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4
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717
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More scrubbing floor thoughts
(Preview)
Hi all, Ok So last week I posted on Having a spiritual awakening while cleaning. Is there such a thing as too much program, because it happened again. But this time was different, maybe because I was more open to it. Well we just moved into this new place about a month ago and tonight we are having a dinner p...
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Mandy123
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7
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563
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Let's share for the new comers,,our first time at an Alanon meeting.....
(Preview)
I remember very clearly how scared and frightened I was to even call Alanon, nevermind go to a meeting. In utter desparation I finally reached out, and entered those doors. I decided to go to another city in the hopes I would not run into anyone I knew, I was ashamed and terrifed. I didnt want people to kno...
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gardengal
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9
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560
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Detachment
(Preview)
Detachment is neither kind nor unkind. It does not imply judgment or condemnation of the person or situation from which we are detaching. Separating ourselves from the adverse affects of another persons behavior* can be a means of detaching: This does not necessarily require physical separation...
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Peggy7
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4
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366
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Truth .... Guilt
(Preview)
((((((((Everyone)))))))) How hard is it for you to speak the truth and not feel guilty? It is easy for me when it is what the person wants to hear... very, very hard when it is not. Last night was a really tough one... For about a month my wife has been so happy with her "sobriety".... I say tha...
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rtexas
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12
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596
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letting go, is it always possible?
(Preview)
Read something tonight about when you finally get sick and tired of being sick and tired, you are close to letting it go and moving on. hmmm, I wonder if this might be true if you let go and leave for good? then I wonder, if you don't leave, can it always be possible to let go? I figgure I am going through stag...
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ddub
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8
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495
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I have been quiet...for a "good" reason
(Preview)
About a month ago I posted that I had decided that no matter how bad my AH was, I wouldn't say anything. Watching him go downhill was so hard, but I held firm with the knowledge that interfering with his drinking over and over throughout the years did not stop the drinking, only created an emotional disas...
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babysteps
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5
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590
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setting boundaries with troublesome folk
(Preview)
At present I am supervising two students with their theses, one has been lax but has the work done, the other whom I had been quite friendly has annoyed the hell out of me but I calmly dealt with her today. Her life is a constant drama, and though she says she has the work done, she finds it difficult to take a...
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maire rua
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4
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343
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don't know what to call this...
(Preview)
I wind up in these work situations and have stayed with them until something happens to make me leave. The first two the companies were going bankrupt and I needed to have a job so I found another because I had to. In both cases I left a year before they folded. I took the first thing offered. Then next one th...
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binohio
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7
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505
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KEITH URBAN, HERE I COME
(Preview)
omg! My dream has come true! Keith Urban is coming to OHIO~! And I have floor seating tickets! My friend Karen and I are going. Hubs are staying home..... I had to join Keith Urban's fan club (I joined a fan club at age 53?!?!?) LOL Tickets went on sale Tues. at 12 noon, if you joined the fan club.....
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Becky1
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13
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827
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