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BALLGAME NIGHT
(Preview)
hELLO EVERYONE, I Need some advice.
I have heard my A talking about a ballgame taking place this weekend. I have heard conversations about a bonfire and a party. This will take place outside. They will watch or listen to the ballgame in his shop, but they will be getting drunk.&n...
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bluebjade
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2
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234
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song lyrics "home" how true! maybe you can relate too
(Preview)
I heard this song in the middle of all the crap last nite. It was so true except the part of being stoned. I don't do that anymore. (rock ) It sucks to feel you live alone when you don't.
THREE DAYS GRACE LYRICS "Home" I’ll be coming home Just to be alone Cause I know you’re n...
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hmrnrnmm
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1
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941
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Talking the talk is one thing...
(Preview)
Walking the walk, quite another.
I read time and time again that we do not have to allow the behavior of the A to affect our moods. And that only WE are responsible for how we respond to the A's condition. NOTHING and NO ONE can make us feel sad, confused, hurt, angry, frustrated, miserable, or alone....
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Diva
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7
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739
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The courage to look at myself...
(Preview)
Hi friends,
I started back to work last week. It has been hectic ever since. I am having to make alot of adjustments because my facility is being renovated. Also, we have to add another class to make our workload. I am on the run, tired, and frustrated. So in a week and a half I have already embarassed a st...
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nmike
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3
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278
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Questioning Leaving
(Preview)
I have worked hard this week trying to put thing into order for me to leave my AH. I felt that was best for both of us. . I was sure that I was making the right move. Then..........it seems like doors started to close. I had 3 people who have many years in Al-Anon tell me the program...
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Gramma Pat
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8
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366
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PERSONAL POWER: Quotes
(Preview)
Personal Power
“The deep root of failure in our lives is to think, ‘Oh how useless and powerless I am.’ It is essential to think strongly and forcefully, ‘I can do it,’ without boasting or fretting.”
-- Dalai Lama
Angeles Arrien says that whether we are male or female, we need to develop three kin...
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Lani
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1
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255
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Back from Family week
(Preview)
Well, I made it. I fret about it before going, I got physically ill while there, but I made it through family week. for those of you out there that have had the experience maybe you will understand. For those of you that have not had the experience I wanted to share some of my experienc...
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curious
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3
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297
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My feet are not set in cement!
(Preview)
(((Everyone)))
I posted earlier about a delima I was having about helping my in-laws move. Well you offered me some wonderful words, which I didn't read until it was too late. <sigh>
I did what I thought was right. Called my in-laws and asked if they wanted my help and as...
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rtexas
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4
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433
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well the a went out tonite
(Preview)
my a husband went out tonite,just left about 20 min ago and it is only 7 at nite..he wanted me to drive him to the bar,but i said no told him to just go,i will pick the car up later..he said for me to come down around 9 to be with him,told him i dont like bars,he says but you like karao...
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bev
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2
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332
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Update
(Preview)
Two weeks ago, I told my AH that we couldn't have a relationship 'til he started some real recovery. He has his own place now, and comes by to visit our two year old occasionally. He doesn't show up very often now that I've told him he doesn't have responsibility at our home as an excuse for drinking. My the...
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ohera101
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3
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240
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tp the people I am sending books to
(Preview)
I still have addresses. Just been so sick, well now, and am poor now.lol but will get them off to you. I did not forget.
love,debilyn
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debilyn
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0
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251
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A letter to the A?
(Preview)
Hello All...
If you've been keeping up, I'm in the process of filing for divorce from my A/cocaine-addicted husband. He doesn't know my plan... yet.
I was thinking about writing him a letter. He's very hard to communicate with (imagine that!) and avoids conversation with me lately. I would li...
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artygirl
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6
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357
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CAN I AVOID BLAMING OTHERS AND "TRY" TO IMPROVE MY OWN CIRCUMSTANCES?
(Preview)
For years I blamed the A's in my life for whatever "I" was feeling that day. If he wouldnt have done this or that, I wouldnt be feeling this way today etc. If my sadness/worry/anger would flare up it would be due to his actions. I would isolate from friends and family, I would sit at home and cry, sink into th...
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gardengal
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5
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550
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Emotions Run Amuck....
(Preview)
Hi everyone....
What a nutty time this is. I can’t believe one can feel so many emotions at once.
Now AH feels horrible after this week, being drunk all the time, threatening to have his car repossessed, the mortgage behind, me finding out about the phone calls wit...
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hersh
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3
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378
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Alanon anniversayr
(Preview)
(((((((((((((Family)))))))))),
Well it is now officially my Alanon 1 year anniversary.
I came here exactly one year ago, afraid, unsure, confused, shy and beyond lonely. How I found this site I don't recall. Must have been HP leading the way. I didn't...
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Karilynn
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9
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338
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So hard to know my own mind...
(Preview)
((((Everyone))))
I struggle with this on a daily basis in my personal life. Interesting thing is I am a manager in a large company and I don't have this issue at work.
I have the hardest time seperating what "I" want as opposed to deciding which of the expectations of the A's in my life I need to...
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rtexas
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6
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364
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emotional hostages?
(Preview)
one thing my A says most often when we're in any level of disagreement is: "you're holding me emotional hostage." uhh, what? i don't ever know what to say to him, other than "that's not my intention, i don't even think that way." he continues to say it. eventually, i realized, he's saying it about himsel...
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purpleraven
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7
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2801
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Voices in my head & My tongue may have a hole....
(Preview)
My tongue may have a hole in it....but inside I feel I did the right thing. My A and I have been dancing the same, very old dance since my mother's funeral. In his mind, he swears I have been here 4 1/2 months...nearly 5! I have been here since June 12th.....I have stuck to my guns...
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marmare
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2
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377
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This has been one long week!
(Preview)
Hey Ya'll,
This has been the longest week on earth! I'm back in the library where my hour is ticking away, and OMG do I ever miss my friends in this place! I didn't think it would be this bad, but Mspeewee!, you were right, I'm withdrawing all over the place! I feel like I've fallen off of the face of the ear...
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Texasjoni21
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5
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419
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feeling better
(Preview)
"normal" for Eden is, animals underfoot, animals sticking their mugs in my way, animals pulling the grain sacks out becuz I forgot to shut the van....lol so letting them from the barn to the front yard is what feels normal! lol
I am thinking winter, ug. I really want to f...
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debilyn
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7
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294
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Shushi
(Preview)
Ok all have to ask. LOL, who has tried shushi, I have never tried it but part of my recovery is trying new things. So, I guess I agree to go to do shushi tonight with my friends. I recently started eatting fish. Fished for them for years but never really ate any fish. So figured I will try it. But...
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DoN4me
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9
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489
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al-anon intervention
(Preview)
i am wondering why it is that everyone who loves an a will consider going thru with an intervention for the a but why are there no such things as al-anon interventions. we all know people who could benefit from this program. why is that no one ever gets together and confronts the enablers? i say thi...
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serendipity
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4
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393
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Prayer is powerful!!!
(Preview)
A son finally got a job today!!!!
Yeah!!!
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Gailey
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2
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267
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Pressure
(Preview)
Lately I have been feeling alot of pressure from my A to go and see him. But the way I am seeing things lately is why should I go threw all the effort all the time and pay to go to him. I just get so frustrated at times because it feels like I am the one doing all the work. My A is on probation for 2 years and ca...
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DoN4me
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3
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242
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Today's Courage To Change
(Preview)
(((Hello Family)))
Just wanted to share a little excerp from CTC today.
"Trying to change other people is futile, foolish, and certainly not loving. Today, instead of assuming that they are the problem, I can look at myself to see what needs changing within".
The passage discusses that befor...
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twinmom2
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3
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438
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New and need support
(Preview)
Hi everyone, my name is Sherry and I am new to this forum, the online meetings and alanon. I have been in a LTR w/a man for 4 yrs who recently has developed an alcohol abuse problem. Maybe he had it all along, and it was just dormant. Not sure. I am here to recover from the insanity that this problem has...
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princess
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5
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437
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I still control his life
(Preview)
Its sad, but true. I'm still trying to control everything he does. I had an eye opener last night, he had to say it to my face. Last 4 days was hell for him. Every phone call i asked him, where are you, who you with, what time you will be at home etc. I had no idea i was doing that. Than another call, telling me he i...
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daisy2
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11
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340
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Thankful
(Preview)
I've got 6 meetings under my belt and I've got such a lighter load than ever before...Why it took me so long to get on the right train, I'll never know! I guess I was too interested in being the manager of the universe..What a sham!!! To anyone who's just starting out, just hang on..It gets be...
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smokey
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3
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285
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what is JADE?
(Preview)
Obviously still very much a newbie here
What is JADE, have tried figuring it out and all I could come up with is Just Another Drunken Escapade. Shows where my life is I guess.
Could someone please help?
lilms
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lilms
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3
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371
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hello
(Preview)
Hello Everyone,
My name is Barbara and I am from Tennessee. I am here because my b\f has a drinking problem. He knows he does and is doing something about it. It took some really bad things to happen to make him see his problem. To make a long story short he had a brush wiht the law at a bar where I was t...
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marks girl
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5
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250
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Not quitting yet
(Preview)
((((everyone)))))
Thanks for your earlier responses. Maria I laughed when I read yours, I haven't been able to get in touch w/ my sponsor, What would she say? "Sure we've all wanted to quit, but we don't." And that would be it, we keep going. However slow, we just do it unti...
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Lunamoth
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2
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268
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My Road to Recovery
(Preview)
I am really trying to stay on the right path to recovery. Being able to objectively reread an online journal over the weekend I had from back in Novemeber of 2004 has been a huge step in my recovery. I was able to recognize a pattern between my A and myself. The arguments, him telling m...
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JulieLynn
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3
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258
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shame
(Preview)
Ever since I can remember my father's Asim has made me feel ashamed and embarrassed. I totally understand why. I did not know it was a disease. Today I have compassion for him. He passed away in 1986.
Why do I still feel ashamed of having an A son? I understand it is a disease, I have compassion for him b...
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Gailey
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3
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272
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Proud Tiger On the Prowl!
(Preview)
Just wanted to tell you that I'm doing GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEat today! I sent LOTS of emails--including thank you notes to the people who got me out of my dad's house; my advisor; the volunteer co ordinator (for where I do volunteer work! ). And I made phone calls to my Drs to get appts mad...
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Tiger2006
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7
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442
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Finally some answers...
(Preview)
Shortly after I had my last child I noticed that things about me were changing. At the time I wrote them off as dealing w/ active disease. Things did not seem to resolve the more I worked the program in my life so I went to my doctor. Presented the laundry list of symptoms and was told it...
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AlaMom
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3
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275
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tuesday
(Preview)
I know I am a broken record about this, but I also know the more we talk and get it out, the sooner we heal.
Was in town getting feed, (what else, not like I am out getting nails done or a massage...)and when I am in the store, driving there, I feel alone. Just a bit back I was ok again with the aloneness and it w...
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debilyn
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4
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273
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Ever feel like you're losing your marbles?
(Preview)
Well here is the cure ... Just smile and say...
Dear Lord ...
I know you're watching over me
And I'm feeling truly blessed
For no matter what I pray for
You always know what's best!
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Gailey
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4
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329
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Taking steps to healthy living
(Preview)
(((Hello Group)))
Thanks to all for the prayers I am feeling better today. I took some steps even in my pain and a little self-pity to some things for me. I've been exercising now everyday since Sunday. I had to really pray on this one because I was so mad at my A for expressing his un...
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twinmom2
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2
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274
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Disesase or Mental Problem??
(Preview)
Someone touched on the disease starting from somthing more deep seated... to quote:
I don't think it is a "disease" but a chronic MENTAL problem that is very complex, deep seated, and difficult to treat.
I spent years in denial that my husband had a "drinking problem"...I tr...
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Georgia girl
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4
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426
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mixed emotions
(Preview)
I met with my new lawyer today and started divorce proceedings. I have an appointment Friday to sign the paperwork. I am feeling a lot of different feelings today, mostly sad. Sad that I have to leave the man I love because he loves drinking and cocaine more than he loves being with me. Sad that I'll most l...
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artygirl
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4
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249
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prayers
(Preview)
Hello Everyone,
I am asking humbly for prayers for a family that I do not even know. But I know the power of prayer and the power that Alanon prayer has. My Best friend and love was killed in head on collusion 8-17-06 in Boyle , Canada. There were three cars in this crash. The one passing was...
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MaggiG
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4
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248
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The Children of Alcoholics
(Preview)
Hi everybody. I havn't been on in a bit. Illness had a way of stealing away my energy levels and extra stress this year hasn't helped!
Living with alcoholics my entire life does take its toll on us. Well... at least it has on me. So glad I am that I have suc...
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Cilla
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2
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354
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need a sponser
(Preview)
Im new to alanon. Im only six months in my local program. I need an online sponser. Is there an experienced sponser willing to help.
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hunnydoll
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2
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282
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honestly
(Preview)
i guess my ex called ,drunk, sunday at 2:30am. i didn't hear the phone thankfully but he left a message. my 7 yr old checked the messages today and we heard him, so completly wasted. she didn't recognize his voice, she thought it was sylvester stalone.....i wish! lol! it was suprising to me. our relatio...
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serendipity
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3
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223
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CONFLICTS WITH KIDS? RELAX
(Preview)
Hi Friends, Here are some quotes and wisdom shared with me today. Take what you like and leave the rest. Every little bit helps. Love you all! Lani Conflicts with the kids? Relax!
“Family life! The United Nations is child's play compared to the tugs and splits and need to understand and forgive in any...
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Lani
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0
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197
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What do you do?
(Preview)
I seem to travel in circles. I'm back to that place where I want someone else to do this for me. I am tired. I just don't want to do this anymore -- "this" meaning working my program, dealing w/ all the crap.
The thing is I know without this program I'd have a WHOLE lot more crap to deal w...
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Lunamoth
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6
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265
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Hello
(Preview)
My name is Rhonda. Im from Illinois. I have a son name Ryan and he is 18. Hes a great kid. My pride and joy. Im a cocktail waitress on a casino. I also date an Alcoholic. Being around addicts are bothering me. That is why Im here. Im aslo a graduate from my local college. I just finished my fourth certificatio...
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hunnydoll
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4
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255
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It's all so very sad...
(Preview)
Today I am limp. The realization of what is to come has hit me like a ton of bricks. He will not talk about his problem; changes the subject at the mere mention of what comes next. Refuses to get help. Says he doesn't need help. Yeah, right! He has been asleep since 5 p.m. yesterday afternoon when he collaps...
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Diva
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18
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565
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August 06 at eden
(Preview)
.
Visit You
Ok as usual Bentlee peecat is on my head. How do I know you ask? I just felt a drip of slobber hit my cheek. At least it missed my glasses.
Been calling Brown Gi-'sun-ka, pronounced Gishoeka. Means brown dog in Dakota Sioux, my gramas tribe.
...
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debilyn
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1
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450
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The freedom of letting it all go....
(Preview)
(((Hi family)))
Just thought I would share my feelings today. When in times of trouble I usually reach out to help someone else – but my mind is in turmoil and my heart is breaking because of the possible infidelity that I just found out about last week so I haven’t been much help here to...
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hersh
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6
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447
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MA AA (w/AlAnon) convention in Nov
(Preview)
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Barbara
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3
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238
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Sharing out side issues
(Preview)
Hello every one , i have been in the chat room a couple of times and i am looking forward to getting to know you all better ODAT. I was Wondring how your group handles members who have been around a while, who know about sharing from the Alanon program who continue to share about out side issue...
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Gemuk91
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5
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241
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My Father the Drunk
(Preview)
Hello my name is Leah, been here B4 but not for awhile. Have more than one A in my family but right now it is my Father who is my biggest worry/concern. His wife (not my Mother) died this year (she was an A also) and he went downhill even further than he already was. He drinks ALL the time,...
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Leah
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5
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392
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Money$$$$$$
(Preview)
HI,
This is a money issue I hope it o.k to write about. My A is not working. He is sober almost one and a half years. I never pushed him to get a job he always said hw working on staying sober. He goes to two meeting a day. But I'm all tapped out. I have on more savings....
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nikkilou
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5
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345
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What's in your tool box?
(Preview)
((((((((((Family))))))))),
I am one of those women who loves a good tool box! Must come from all the theatre work and the years I spent with my Dad watching him in his workshop. I love the smell of sawdust. Take me to a lumber yard, and I'm yours for life!
I have my fishi...
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Karilynn
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5
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563
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got "Courage To Change"
(Preview)
... also got "Blueprint For Change" to help me with the 4th step (i like Q&A format journaling). i'm not the kind of person to literally read daily affirmations on the day they say, i just pick the book C2C at random and read, if it applies to my current feelings/situation then i journal about it. anyway,...
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purpleraven
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8
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822
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New here...
(Preview)
Hello,
Well, here goes nothing…(or should I say everything) My name is Amanda. I am 24 yrs old. I am married to a wonderful man for about 3.5 years now. We have the most adorable baby boy who is 7 months old.
My father has been an alcoholic for all of my life....
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manda0719
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4
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291
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what i'm sick of
(Preview)
I read a great post here today titled the list. I give this person so much credit because here's the only list in my head. The only phrase in my head is I'm so sick of....Here's what I am sick of: sick of the smell from my A, sick of the drunk mumbling, sick of the hurtful words, sick of the...
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daisygrl4
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8
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463
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Something to cheer you up
(Preview)
1. At least 2 people in this world love you so much they would die for you. 2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way. 3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you. 4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you. 5. Every nig...
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daisy2
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7
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376
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Things people say in Alanon that help me so much
(Preview)
only your A can choose his path in recovery.
Twinmom~
Alanon can help you to think more about you. You learn we have no control over the A. We stop even bringing it up to them as it is not our concern. We think about how we feel, what we want.
...
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Gailey
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1
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235
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