Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Hello All, I am sitting here wondering how I ended up in this position yet again. Last night my "A" took the car saying he'd be back in about an hour. That was at 6:30pm, well it is 8:50am and he isn't home. Normally I would just go on with my day knowing that sooner or later he'll come home with his tail tu...

nancyfrances · nancyfrances

I feel like the queen of codependency and enabling. Been doing alot of reading - Al-anon books - and have realized how things sounds so familiar. I try to help everyone but myself and have made myself miserable. Kept trying to change my husband to no avail - brought myself ri...

sdisnie · sdisnie

It's all happened so fast, all within 5 weeks. He leaves home to go work and 'says' he's hoping for a better opportunity for me and kids and a new life, more money, a fresh start. He's supposed to be back in two weeks for Xmas. Instead, he relapses, almost dies, goes to the hospital,&n...

confused · confused

So he just called, has the poor me's . Totally different tone then the past week or so. Will need to leave his dad's, fixated on "you are not alone" sign at meeting and felt alone, not doing good mentally, blah, blah....All that guilt in a 5 minute conversation. This is so tiring. All I could manage to say w...

confused · confused

Hi everyone, I haven't posted in a week or so. Trying to get by. Been to a couple of f2f this week, they were quite helpful. I have been feeling very overwhelmed and pressured by my A's actions and words. He was calling like 10 times a day and if a day went by that he did not see me all i would here was how dif...

kat4u · kat4u

Hi, I don't get into chat very often, and try to attend the meetings I can. Sometimes when I can't sleep and all the problems associated with my As brother's death pile up on me...I come to chat to vent, or just have someone to listen to. Tonite, I went into chat, and was shocked when...

liliana · liliana

Hi, It's great to be back my computer was in the repair shop for almost 2 weeks. I resigned from my longterm job yesterday, and will be working at my part time job-full time starting in two weeks. I was under payed and really being taken advantage of for way too long. I made a well thoug...

megan · megan

I cannot host the Sunday 7pm meeting. I have houseguests, my SIL shower and now, I found out last night, relatives from PA are coming. And I need to take my sister to thwe airport at 6. If any OP can cover my shift I will be very grateful

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Hello All, I posted this morning about my "A" not coming home, and the fact that I had plans to attend the concert and I needed him to watch the kids. Well at noon I called my best friend and she said she would watch the kids for me. I had to wait till noon to call her, because she likes to sleep in on the weeken...

Jayda · Jayda

Does anyone know of any message boards for family members of crack addicts?

lilleah · lilleah

Ok, I hope this does not sound nuts, but I can tell the nights my A is going to go out, even before HE knows! It is just this feeling I get, I don't know, but I was wondering if anyone else could sense that too? Maybe it is b/c he got paid and has money, so I just figured he would go out. The only time he d...

John_R · John_R

John and I completed the server switchover tonight, and there may still be people using mIRC who cannot get into the new room. The following instructions are designed to be as simple as possible and should get you over there, by creating a new entry for the new server. 1) Open up mIRC and...

debilyn · debilyn

I tell ya, last night I read about a 19 year old who got 2 dui's in an hour. I wanted to go find him, take him to see my A and say this is YOUR future. Probaby would not make a bit of difference as people that young don't really believe anything like that will happen to them. Thus why our 18 to 21 year olds...

Becky1 · Becky1

My A husband and I have been together since 1997, married since 2000. I am so lonely, sometimes I think I will die. I have been in therapy, and reading Alanon literature, and coming to the chatroom and meetings here. I have been focusing on myself, trying to deal with everything. I'm getting better, but...

Feather · Feather

Hi All! I am feeling more than a little frustrated right now and thought I would write it here, as this may help. As you may know my a (husband) has his own home to go to when he drinks. He is a binge drinker who will drink 24/7 for a week or so. Then go through the horrible recovery symptoms. Then he is able...

DoulaonCall · DoulaonCall

This is my first post here: A quick snapshot of me is, married almost 10 years to a very functional A. He has been in and out of recovery for a few years. He has moved from drinking every day to once or twice a month. It seems as if he is committed to working on recovery, committed to improvement and to “tr...

Confused2 · Confused2

My dear wife has had a very bad back condition for the past 5 years that has required Doctors to treat the pain because no one would fix the problem. Her condition was not bad enough for surgery according to her Doctors until the last 6 months when her spine just gave way. She had L-1 through t-4 fused. Pain...

chrissy · chrissy

hi everyone , i just wanted to say hello and tell you everything is still going fantastic. chuck is clean & sober thank god!! amanda is doing great too. i am very happy & i hope everyone is doing great :) keep in touch hugs chrissy

mamaof4angels · mamaof4angels

Hi everyone, I am a new member and after 32 yrs of living complete hell in my life, I finally decided I need help for me! I have grown in a home with a mother who was addicted to addictions as I would call it. She was addicted to alcohol, drugs, sex, men, gambling, you name it. My 2 brothers and I were of NO int...

marmare · marmare

I know we all get stuff in our email, however today I received the following and really thought all of us could us it, even the males here.....so I have changed a bit of it to reflect on us all... Hugs Mary Person to Person Encouragement Someone will always be better looking. They will alway...

mamaof4angels · mamaof4angels

That there was somewhere online I would be able to talk to ppl in my shoes. My A mother goes to AA meetings and tells the ppl there how she has not had a drink in years and how her family means everything to her, and it was only 3 weeks ago we caught her drunk....3 WEEKS AGO!!! LIES LIES LIES .....all she kn...

sas · sas

Just a quick vent.....I have been trying to write something for over 30 minutes now and after being interrupted a few too many times for really important things like "where is an inkpen?, Who is on the phone?, What are you doing?, What is ESH?, I thought you were going out?, Why can't I read what your writ...

allison · allison

I have been writting alot of negative posts so I thought I would write a positive one while I was in a good mood.I had my first therapy session today and it went really well. I was expecting the therapist to tell me I was crazy but She said just the opposite...that I was right and My A is just manipulating me....

flintfeet · flintfeet

i looked up alanon meetings in my local area. there are so many different kinds. i have no idea where to start. there are brown baggers, serinity group, recovery, trinity, pick me ups, liturature,...many more. what have i gotten myself into:)smile. i'll find something.

doxie · doxie

Hello! I don't know what is going on. I just got a new computer today. I can get into chat on my old one still, but not on this new one. Whatever could be wrong? What do I need to do? The whole point of getting this computer was to have a computer of my own in my room! Grrrrrr Thanks so much Doxie

pixel04 · pixel04

this seems like such a small thing, but i was really happy with how it worked out. last weekend i played poker with some friends, one of whom is a former manager of mine. he is a much better poker player than i am, and at one point during the game he predicted i was about to make a stupid move, and he used a ton...

WakingUp · WakingUp

So I'm the new literature person for my meeting, beginning the 1st week in January. The first week I tried to talk with the previous literature person, and she just basically said that I was to tell people that we have newcomer packs and other great literature, see me at the break. I can ad l...

hudsond · hudsond

My a has been very grouchy the past 3 weeks. I know for sure he has used 2 times in the pst 3 weeks. I'm guessing he has actually used more. I told him last night that I missed his smile. He said he hadn't realized it hadn't been smiling. I told him it had been about 3 weeks sin...

UncleLou · UncleLou

I'd really like some honest impartial feedback here. Here's an email exchange with my ex in response to an incident that happened the night before. She is trying to figure out if she should try to work at our relationship to regain the feelings she once had for me. We are still livin...

karyn · karyn

NOT 12 Step, sorry but... My husband is in an intense aversion medical program. Really intense. Self induced after coming to grips with personally how bad off he was. As a result, he is going to be over sensitive to anything with even a wiff of scent. I am a person who loves the tastes in moderati...

flintfeet · flintfeet

yesturday i broke down to my hubbie about how i have been feeling. i feel like no one understands including him. my dad is the A and it hurts me and the rest of our family. my husband is the most amazing man, and is always supportive. but a few weeks ago he made a comment like saying "don't get all worked up b/c...

flintfeet · flintfeet

all i keep thinking about is my dad. i wonder if he is thinking of me too. i wonder if he is blitzed out of his mind or thinking of his family.i know the answer to that...he is drunk. if he's not, he's thinking of how to numb the feeling of his family. i feel sorry for him.

nycbt · nycbt

I am doing good this welek. I have good days he hasn 't gone drinking. I am working on my step 3. I am setting up to be in mirc/op. If everything goes well I will be one for tom morning. Here some saying: "There is no good reason why we should not develop and change until the last day we live." by Karen Hor...

Audrey · Audrey

Well I finally did it! I Let Go! After reading the Post by Tea2 last week over and over again, I realized it was time. Last night I had to take my son to a dr appt. My a husband, oh like so many other nights, decided to stop at a bar on the way home from work, which mean...

Emafer · Emafer

I was just wondering if anyone knows of a study or just in general has experience with a highly intelligent alcoholic. I've found that ao many alcoholics and addicts I know are highly intelligent, and highly aware of thier own pain and therefore find drinking and drugging as an easy solution to...

penny · penny

Hi This is my first time posting on any site whatsoever so please bear with me. Briefly my fella has had a problem with drink for the last 6 years but the past 8 months have been the worst. He has been in rehab a couple of times but got nothing out of it. He has tried AA , 4 weeks sober then...

Alexandrite1313 · Alexandrite1313

Again, thank you all for your replies and the warm welcome. After reading a few posts and realising I wasn't alone and that my case wasn't much different than anyone else living with an A, I decided that I do belong in here. I needed a place to relate, a place where I knew I wouldn't be judge or TOLD what to do...

flintfeet · flintfeet

i have not spoken to my dad in weeks, and i am sad. i feel like i have no closure with him b/c we didn't talk about the situation. if you try to have a conversation that is confrentaional, he blocks you out, asks you to leave, and then pretends that nothing happened. so i figured i would send him...

marmare · marmare

I didn't get the job I interviewed for but I'm not sad or disappointed! The actual job was a little different then the ad, as it would have mainly been bookkeeping, which I don't have experience at, I would have been secluded in an office, my personality needs customer interaction. ...

Cyn · Cyn

Hey all I started my new job this week and I cannot get onto the chat room when I am here :(. My hours are crazy since I work from 8am -5 at one job and then off to the other one till almost 10pm so by the time I get home - I am so shot that I dont want to be online chatting. I cant even go to my f2f anymore :(.&n...

sdisnie · sdisnie

It's me again, always trying to understand everything. So, explain to me why AA and Al-anon teaches us that we are not supposed to expect love in return from a marriage to an addict. We are only supposed to care for ourself, take care of ourself etc. Of course we can't force someone to lov...

nmike · nmike

My A has basically abandoned this relationship. He said that he didn't want to be in a marital relationship with me - that he loses himself, he only has short time left to do the things that he wants to do which includes golf. This is after 32 years and he says he never wanted to be here. He says that the only r...

kissers · kissers

Hi everyone! Some of you may remember me telling you about a guy I met around Thanksgiving. Things were going very well until this past weekend. I saw some red flags, but waited a little more. Before Alanon, I would have made excuses for his behavior and hung around some more to be treated poorly and pu...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

ok, i am in the s*** house with my sister (we grew up as sisters but are BIO cousins) anway, her hubby 2 weeks ago, had heart attack....i was at the very same time doing this AWFUL workbook and going into crying /grief mode....i put off MY work, for a couple of days ti...

GSDGIRL36 · GSDGIRL36

My husband left rehab this weekend,...he made 11 days. I had mixed feelings on it, I wanted him to be home, we all missed him, but I wanted him to stay. Searching my feelings I've come to the conclusion that it wasn't that I didn't think he was ready...to be honest I don't know how many days that takes. He'd...

Cyn · Cyn

Well - a positive update for me - I spent almost all of last week entertaining the guy I met in Chicago for 3 days. It was probably one of the best times I have ever had with anyone - easy, enjoyable, never laughed so hard in my entire life. He is sweet and kind and treated me very well. H...

flintfeet · flintfeet

i am not sure about how to start the right way of changing things. i have no contact with my dad, so i no longer inable him. it's hard for me b/c i have 2 kids (1yr &3yr) that LOVE papaw. i am strong and too proud of a person to go back on my word to have contact with him. although i feel like i am taking t...

Emafer · Emafer

I fee like over the last several months I've been hit by blow after blow regarding my relationships. Grantes, these were clearly not the right men for me, but it's hard for me to not take things personally. My first inclination is to think "Why not me? What's wrong with me?" No, I realize that I'm not real...

flintfeet · flintfeet

like i have told many of you...i have epilepsy & therefore do not drive. so i can't get to the meetings. i think maybe this is an excuse for not going. i thought about it today, and realized i think i am ashamed. i want to speak out about my situation, but i don't want anyone to know how much it bugs...

BlueCloud · BlueCloud

Dear Roomies, A while back I read from Courage to Change an entry that explores the idea of not only making amends to others, but to oneself. As I approach February, the month of valentines, friendship, and love, I am considering spending this month with a special intention of loving myself, and t...

YKnot · YKnot

I thought my son was my ally against alcohol but I have recently found out that he is a drinker, too, just like his stepmom. Now I am realizing I am alone in the struggle. Not just alone, but devasted with two "A's" in my immediate family circle. My son has been stealing from me -- anything and everything fr...

Alexandrite1313 · Alexandrite1313

Firstly, I would like to thank everyone who replied to my post yesterday. It gave me some insight and of course, we all have our opinions and it helps to have different feedbacks. I haven't used your replies to make a decision of course on how I will continue living with an A since my s...

megan · megan

A good MIP friend gave me a screw. It is in a case with the saying "use as needed to let you know you are never truly alone you have alanon and the MIP family." My life at this moment is a perfect storm of stress and I have been using the screw as needed like ALOT. I am on a business trip to Texas an...

Bigus · Bigus

I just recently started attending Al-Anon meetings...while I find them very helpful in that I can associate with people that undestand what I have been through. But I truly don't buy into some of the beliefs in the meetings, not that they're bad things, nor do I want to offend anyone..I don't se...

John · John

This is simply a notice that all Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums chat rooms will be moved to a new dedicated server, that is solely for the use of Miracles In Progress. This change will be fully initiated on Sunday, January 22nd, 2006. It is our greatest hope that all ops/chai...

flintfeet · flintfeet

this might make some of you mad. so i apologize ahead of time. i keep hearing people blame it on the diease. i can't grasp that concept. i am supposed to be understanding b/c he can't help it? i think it is bull. why am i the one who has to "fix" myself when he is the one with the problem? i feel like he has no ac...

debilyn · debilyn

There was this guy who got stopped around here not long ago and was sited for drunk driving. He was belligerant, hit a cop, non compliant, uncooperative and Had to be subdued with spray then he was physically restrained. He refused the sobriety test. It was later found out he was diabetic...

sdisnie · sdisnie

First of all, I think the whole co-dependent thing is a crock. Everyone has to be dependent (not all the time) but a lot of times in your life. That is why we have friends and family, if you can't ever break down and be needy somethings, it would be a cold cold world. I don't believe I'm totally co-dependent...

marmare · marmare

I haven't been here a lot recently and have missed all of you and the board. First let me tell you that my A is still clean & sober! The grumpiness has worn off and he is being more attentive. My second son was home on leave with his family and they left yesterday to go back to AZ.&n...

bd · bd

Before christmas my sister and i had developed what i believed to be a new relationship. Up to that point we had not talked for over a year. We spent christmas together at my parents and things seemed fine. Over the last few weeks we have made plans numerous times to meet for dinner.&...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Disapointment, Anger, and Choices (Preview) Hello All, I am sitting here wondering how I ended up in this position yet again. Last night my "A" took the car saying he'd be back in about an hour. That was at 6:30pm, well it is 8:50am and he isn't home. Normally I would just go on with my day knowing that sooner or later he'll come home with his tail tu...	Dolphin123	3	508	Jan 22, 2006 by maresie
	Just realized how co-dependent and enabling I am (Preview) I feel like the queen of codependency and enabling. Been doing alot of reading - Al-anon books - and have realized how things sounds so familiar. I try to help everyone but myself and have made myself miserable. Kept trying to change my husband to no avail - brought myself ri...	nancyfrances	3	453	Jan 22, 2006 by maresie
	He wants a divorce (Preview) It's all happened so fast, all within 5 weeks. He leaves home to go work and 'says' he's hoping for a better opportunity for me and kids and a new life, more money, a fresh start. He's supposed to be back in two weeks for Xmas. Instead, he relapses, almost dies, goes to the hospital,&n...	sdisnie	8	674	Jan 22, 2006 by maresie
	he called, the roller coaster is up and running again (Preview) So he just called, has the poor me's . Totally different tone then the past week or so. Will need to leave his dad's, fixated on "you are not alone" sign at meeting and felt alone, not doing good mentally, blah, blah....All that guilt in a 5 minute conversation. This is so tiring. All I could manage to say w...	confused	4	490	Jan 22, 2006 by maresie
	kids, separation, manipulation some esh needed (Preview) Hi everyone, I haven't posted in a week or so. Trying to get by. Been to a couple of f2f this week, they were quite helpful. I have been feeling very overwhelmed and pressured by my A's actions and words. He was calling like 10 times a day and if a day went by that he did not see me all i would here was how dif...	confused	2	479	Jan 22, 2006 by maresie
	Ugly remark in chat room (Preview) Hi, I don't get into chat very often, and try to attend the meetings I can. Sometimes when I can't sleep and all the problems associated with my As brother's death pile up on me...I come to chat to vent, or just have someone to listen to. Tonite, I went into chat, and was shocked when...	kat4u	20	733	Jan 22, 2006 by kat4u
	resigned from work yesterday. (Preview) Hi, It's great to be back my computer was in the repair shop for almost 2 weeks. I resigned from my longterm job yesterday, and will be working at my part time job-full time starting in two weeks. I was under payed and really being taken advantage of for way too long. I made a well thoug...	liliana	2	603	Jan 22, 2006 by maresie
	Sunday 7pm meeting coverage (Preview) I cannot host the Sunday 7pm meeting. I have houseguests, my SIL shower and now, I found out last night, relatives from PA are coming. And I need to take my sister to thwe airport at 6. If any OP can cover my shift I will be very grateful	megan	1	461	Jan 22, 2006 by Faith73
	Update on Disapointment, Anger, and Choices. (Preview) Hello All, I posted this morning about my "A" not coming home, and the fact that I had plans to attend the concert and I needed him to watch the kids. Well at noon I called my best friend and she said she would watch the kids for me. I had to wait till noon to call her, because she likes to sleep in on the weeken...	Dolphin123	4	552	Jan 22, 2006 by tea2
	Crack Addiction boards? (Preview) Does anyone know of any message boards for family members of crack addicts?	Jayda	4	545	Jan 22, 2006 by Dolphin123
	confusion (Preview) Ok, I hope this does not sound nuts, but I can tell the nights my A is going to go out, even before HE knows! It is just this feeling I get, I don't know, but I was wondering if anyone else could sense that too? Maybe it is b/c he got paid and has money, so I just figured he would go out. The only time he d...	lilleah	4	452	Jan 22, 2006 by nmike
	mIRC Configuration Changes (Preview) John and I completed the server switchover tonight, and there may still be people using mIRC who cannot get into the new room. The following instructions are designed to be as simple as possible and should get you over there, by creating a new entry for the new server. 1) Open up mIRC and...	John_R	0	455	Jan 22, 2006 by John_R
	Vat next dahling? (Preview) I tell ya, last night I read about a 19 year old who got 2 dui's in an hour. I wanted to go find him, take him to see my A and say this is YOUR future. Probaby would not make a bit of difference as people that young don't really believe anything like that will happen to them. Thus why our 18 to 21 year olds...	debilyn	10	582	Jan 22, 2006 by debilyn
	Trouble with Intimacy? (Preview) My A husband and I have been together since 1997, married since 2000. I am so lonely, sometimes I think I will die. I have been in therapy, and reading Alanon literature, and coming to the chatroom and meetings here. I have been focusing on myself, trying to deal with everything. I'm getting better, but...	Becky1	8	671	Jan 22, 2006 by Faith73
	Frustrated.... (Preview) Hi All! I am feeling more than a little frustrated right now and thought I would write it here, as this may help. As you may know my a (husband) has his own home to go to when he drinks. He is a binge drinker who will drink 24/7 for a week or so. Then go through the horrible recovery symptoms. Then he is able...	Feather	3	396	Jan 21, 2006 by Feather
	Crossroads (Preview) This is my first post here: A quick snapshot of me is, married almost 10 years to a very functional A. He has been in and out of recovery for a few years. He has moved from drinking every day to once or twice a month. It seems as if he is committed to working on recovery, committed to improvement and to “tr...	DoulaonCall	5	792	Jan 21, 2006 by DoulaonCall
	I think I have a problem!!! Help!!! (Preview) My dear wife has had a very bad back condition for the past 5 years that has required Doctors to treat the pain because no one would fix the problem. Her condition was not bad enough for surgery according to her Doctors until the last 6 months when her spine just gave way. She had L-1 through t-4 fused. Pain...	Confused2	6	549	Jan 21, 2006 by Confused2
	up date (Preview) hi everyone , i just wanted to say hello and tell you everything is still going fantastic. chuck is clean & sober thank god!! amanda is doing great too. i am very happy & i hope everyone is doing great :) keep in touch hugs chrissy	chrissy	6	451	Jan 21, 2006 by Dolphin123
	I need a friend... (Preview) Hi everyone, I am a new member and after 32 yrs of living complete hell in my life, I finally decided I need help for me! I have grown in a home with a mother who was addicted to addictions as I would call it. She was addicted to alcohol, drugs, sex, men, gambling, you name it. My 2 brothers and I were of NO int...	mamaof4angels	8	546	Jan 21, 2006 by Maria123
	Rarely do I do this (Preview) I know we all get stuff in our email, however today I received the following and really thought all of us could us it, even the males here.....so I have changed a bit of it to reflect on us all... Hugs Mary Person to Person Encouragement Someone will always be better looking. They will alway...	marmare	11	536	Jan 21, 2006 by Karilynn
	Never have I imagined... (Preview) That there was somewhere online I would be able to talk to ppl in my shoes. My A mother goes to AA meetings and tells the ppl there how she has not had a drink in years and how her family means everything to her, and it was only 3 weeks ago we caught her drunk....3 WEEKS AGO!!! LIES LIES LIES .....all she kn...	mamaof4angels	3	419	Jan 21, 2006 by mamaof4angels
	AGGRAVATED! (Preview) Just a quick vent.....I have been trying to write something for over 30 minutes now and after being interrupted a few too many times for really important things like "where is an inkpen?, Who is on the phone?, What are you doing?, What is ESH?, I thought you were going out?, Why can't I read what your writ...	sas	4	478	Jan 21, 2006 by afglin
	a better day :) (Preview) I have been writting alot of negative posts so I thought I would write a positive one while I was in a good mood.I had my first therapy session today and it went really well. I was expecting the therapist to tell me I was crazy but She said just the opposite...that I was right and My A is just manipulating me....	allison	2	387	Jan 21, 2006 by angelinme908
	never been to meetings (Preview) i looked up alanon meetings in my local area. there are so many different kinds. i have no idea where to start. there are brown baggers, serinity group, recovery, trinity, pick me ups, liturature,...many more. what have i gotten myself into:)smile. i'll find something.	flintfeet	5	429	Jan 21, 2006 by angelinme908
	Chat/computer help (Preview) Hello! I don't know what is going on. I just got a new computer today. I can get into chat on my old one still, but not on this new one. Whatever could be wrong? What do I need to do? The whole point of getting this computer was to have a computer of my own in my room! Grrrrrr Thanks so much Doxie	doxie	1	413	Jan 20, 2006 by bobump
	keeping my side of the street clean (Preview) this seems like such a small thing, but i was really happy with how it worked out. last weekend i played poker with some friends, one of whom is a former manager of mine. he is a much better poker player than i am, and at one point during the game he predicted i was about to make a stupid move, and he used a ton...	pixel04	5	1884	Jan 20, 2006 by nmike
	Am I being too sensitive? (Preview) So I'm the new literature person for my meeting, beginning the 1st week in January. The first week I tried to talk with the previous literature person, and she just basically said that I was to tell people that we have newcomer packs and other great literature, see me at the break. I can ad l...	WakingUp	6	533	Jan 20, 2006 by krise
	Blew it last night (Preview) My a has been very grouchy the past 3 weeks. I know for sure he has used 2 times in the pst 3 weeks. I'm guessing he has actually used more. I told him last night that I missed his smile. He said he hadn't realized it hadn't been smiling. I told him it had been about 3 weeks sin...	hudsond	6	479	Jan 20, 2006 by krise
	Am I nasty? Attacking her? (Preview) I'd really like some honest impartial feedback here. Here's an email exchange with my ex in response to an incident that happened the night before. She is trying to figure out if she should try to work at our relationship to regain the feelings she once had for me. We are still livin...	UncleLou	9	615	Jan 20, 2006 by krise
	Dealing with medical rehab for him (Preview) NOT 12 Step, sorry but... My husband is in an intense aversion medical program. Really intense. Self induced after coming to grips with personally how bad off he was. As a result, he is going to be over sensitive to anything with even a wiff of scent. I am a person who loves the tastes in moderati...	karyn	7	611	Jan 20, 2006 by karyn
	broke down (Preview) yesturday i broke down to my hubbie about how i have been feeling. i feel like no one understands including him. my dad is the A and it hurts me and the rest of our family. my husband is the most amazing man, and is always supportive. but a few weeks ago he made a comment like saying "don't get all worked up b/c...	flintfeet	3	554	Jan 20, 2006 by abbyal
	all i can think about (Preview) all i keep thinking about is my dad. i wonder if he is thinking of me too. i wonder if he is blitzed out of his mind or thinking of his family.i know the answer to that...he is drunk. if he's not, he's thinking of how to numb the feeling of his family. i feel sorry for him.	flintfeet	3	494	Jan 20, 2006 by abbyal
	ok (Preview) I am doing good this welek. I have good days he hasn 't gone drinking. I am working on my step 3. I am setting up to be in mirc/op. If everything goes well I will be one for tom morning. Here some saying: "There is no good reason why we should not develop and change until the last day we live." by Karen Hor...	nycbt	2	410	Jan 20, 2006 by Rebecca
	I Let Go!!! (Preview) Well I finally did it! I Let Go! After reading the Post by Tea2 last week over and over again, I realized it was time. Last night I had to take my son to a dr appt. My a husband, oh like so many other nights, decided to stop at a bar on the way home from work, which mean...	Audrey	4	551	Jan 20, 2006 by Gailey
	Alcoholism and high intelligence? (Preview) I was just wondering if anyone knows of a study or just in general has experience with a highly intelligent alcoholic. I've found that ao many alcoholics and addicts I know are highly intelligent, and highly aware of thier own pain and therefore find drinking and drugging as an easy solution to...	Emafer	14	3339	Jan 20, 2006 by ashraven
	New to this (Preview) Hi This is my first time posting on any site whatsoever so please bear with me. Briefly my fella has had a problem with drink for the last 6 years but the past 8 months have been the worst. He has been in rehab a couple of times but got nothing out of it. He has tried AA , 4 weeks sober then...	penny	5	540	Jan 20, 2006 by flintfeet
	My Decision (Preview) Again, thank you all for your replies and the warm welcome. After reading a few posts and realising I wasn't alone and that my case wasn't much different than anyone else living with an A, I decided that I do belong in here. I needed a place to relate, a place where I knew I wouldn't be judge or TOLD what to do...	Alexandrite1313	3	495	Jan 20, 2006 by hudsond
	what do u think? (Preview) i have not spoken to my dad in weeks, and i am sad. i feel like i have no closure with him b/c we didn't talk about the situation. if you try to have a conversation that is confrentaional, he blocks you out, asks you to leave, and then pretends that nothing happened. so i figured i would send him...	flintfeet	2	418	Jan 20, 2006 by rosie light shines
	But I'm not sad (Preview) I didn't get the job I interviewed for but I'm not sad or disappointed! The actual job was a little different then the ad, as it would have mainly been bookkeeping, which I don't have experience at, I would have been secluded in an office, my personality needs customer interaction. ...	marmare	4	534	Jan 20, 2006 by leo
	Miss you guys (Preview) Hey all I started my new job this week and I cannot get onto the chat room when I am here :(. My hours are crazy since I work from 8am -5 at one job and then off to the other one till almost 10pm so by the time I get home - I am so shot that I dont want to be online chatting. I cant even go to my f2f anymore :(.&n...	Cyn	4	432	Jan 20, 2006 by sandie123
	Explain to me..... (Preview) It's me again, always trying to understand everything. So, explain to me why AA and Al-anon teaches us that we are not supposed to expect love in return from a marriage to an addict. We are only supposed to care for ourself, take care of ourself etc. Of course we can't force someone to lov...	sdisnie	7	591	Jan 20, 2006 by northstar
	Called an attorney (Preview) My A has basically abandoned this relationship. He said that he didn't want to be in a marital relationship with me - that he loses himself, he only has short time left to do the things that he wants to do which includes golf. This is after 32 years and he says he never wanted to be here. He says that the only r...	nmike	4	507	Jan 20, 2006 by leo
	Pulling The Doormat Sign Off My Forehead (Preview) Hi everyone! Some of you may remember me telling you about a guy I met around Thanksgiving. Things were going very well until this past weekend. I saw some red flags, but waited a little more. Before Alanon, I would have made excuses for his behavior and hung around some more to be treated poorly and pu...	kissers	10	601	Jan 19, 2006 by kissers
	is it a CRIME for me to get MY needs met???? (Preview) ok, i am in the s* house with my sister (we grew up as sisters but are BIO cousins) anway, her hubby 2 weeks ago, had heart attack....i was at the very same time doing this AWFUL workbook and going into crying /grief mode....i put off MY work, for a couple of days ti...**	rosie light shines	7	577	Jan 19, 2006 by notsonew1111
	He's Back (Preview) My husband left rehab this weekend,...he made 11 days. I had mixed feelings on it, I wanted him to be home, we all missed him, but I wanted him to stay. Searching my feelings I've come to the conclusion that it wasn't that I didn't think he was ready...to be honest I don't know how many days that takes. He'd...	GSDGIRL36	5	472	Jan 19, 2006 by notsonew1111
	Feel like I havent been on in FOREVER (Preview) Well - a positive update for me - I spent almost all of last week entertaining the guy I met in Chicago for 3 days. It was probably one of the best times I have ever had with anyone - easy, enjoyable, never laughed so hard in my entire life. He is sweet and kind and treated me very well. H...	Cyn	6	470	Jan 19, 2006 by notsonew1111
	the right way? (Preview) i am not sure about how to start the right way of changing things. i have no contact with my dad, so i no longer inable him. it's hard for me b/c i have 2 kids (1yr &3yr) that LOVE papaw. i am strong and too proud of a person to go back on my word to have contact with him. although i feel like i am taking t...	flintfeet	6	548	Jan 19, 2006 by maresie
	I feel like I keep getting hit (Preview) I fee like over the last several months I've been hit by blow after blow regarding my relationships. Grantes, these were clearly not the right men for me, but it's hard for me to not take things personally. My first inclination is to think "Why not me? What's wrong with me?" No, I realize that I'm not real...	Emafer	7	457	Jan 19, 2006 by maresie
	ashamed! (Preview) like i have told many of you...i have epilepsy & therefore do not drive. so i can't get to the meetings. i think maybe this is an excuse for not going. i thought about it today, and realized i think i am ashamed. i want to speak out about my situation, but i don't want anyone to know how much it bugs...	flintfeet	8	697	Jan 19, 2006 by angelinme908
	Making Amends To One's Self (Preview) Dear Roomies, A while back I read from Courage to Change an entry that explores the idea of not only making amends to others, but to oneself. As I approach February, the month of valentines, friendship, and love, I am considering spending this month with a special intention of loving myself, and t...	BlueCloud	2	565	Jan 19, 2006 by maresie
	My Son Has Been Lying to Me (Preview) I thought my son was my ally against alcohol but I have recently found out that he is a drinker, too, just like his stepmom. Now I am realizing I am alone in the struggle. Not just alone, but devasted with two "A's" in my immediate family circle. My son has been stealing from me -- anything and everything fr...	YKnot	6	612	Jan 19, 2006 by lalarainbow
	Should I tell him about this place? (Preview) Firstly, I would like to thank everyone who replied to my post yesterday. It gave me some insight and of course, we all have our opinions and it helps to have different feedbacks. I haven't used your replies to make a decision of course on how I will continue living with an A since my s...	Alexandrite1313	5	807	Jan 19, 2006 by maresie
	My MIP screw (Preview) A good MIP friend gave me a screw. It is in a case with the saying "use as needed to let you know you are never truly alone you have alanon and the MIP family." My life at this moment is a perfect storm of stress and I have been using the screw as needed like ALOT. I am on a business trip to Texas an...	megan	12	844	Jan 19, 2006 by Rebecca
	New here seeking guidance... (Preview) I just recently started attending Al-Anon meetings...while I find them very helpful in that I can associate with people that undestand what I have been through. But I truly don't buy into some of the beliefs in the meetings, not that they're bad things, nor do I want to offend anyone..I don't se...	Bigus	13	824	Jan 19, 2006 by Bigus
	Chat Rooms and Server Upgraded! (Please Read) (Preview) This is simply a notice that all Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums chat rooms will be moved to a new dedicated server, that is solely for the use of Miracles In Progress. This change will be fully initiated on Sunday, January 22nd, 2006. It is our greatest hope that all ops/chai...	John	0	466	Jan 19, 2006 by John
	u might get mad... (Preview) this might make some of you mad. so i apologize ahead of time. i keep hearing people blame it on the diease. i can't grasp that concept. i am supposed to be understanding b/c he can't help it? i think it is bull. why am i the one who has to "fix" myself when he is the one with the problem? i feel like he has no ac...	flintfeet	14	1009	Jan 19, 2006 by gogogirl
	We do not control A guilt (Preview) There was this guy who got stopped around here not long ago and was sited for drunk driving. He was belligerant, hit a cop, non compliant, uncooperative and Had to be subdued with spray then he was physically restrained. He refused the sobriety test. It was later found out he was diabetic...	debilyn	1	420	Jan 19, 2006 by just me
	UPDATE on: Is there still hope? (Preview) First of all, I think the whole co-dependent thing is a crock. Everyone has to be dependent (not all the time) but a lot of times in your life. That is why we have friends and family, if you can't ever break down and be needy somethings, it would be a cold cold world. I don't believe I'm totally co-dependent...	sdisnie	7	558	Jan 18, 2006 by maresie
	I realized.... (Preview) I haven't been here a lot recently and have missed all of you and the board. First let me tell you that my A is still clean & sober! The grumpiness has worn off and he is being more attentive. My second son was home on leave with his family and they left yesterday to go back to AZ.&n...	marmare	7	524	Jan 18, 2006 by notsonew1111
	my sister (Preview) Before christmas my sister and i had developed what i believed to be a new relationship. Up to that point we had not talked for over a year. We spent christmas together at my parents and things seemed fine. Over the last few weeks we have made plans numerous times to meet for dinner.&...	bd	4	423	Jan 18, 2006 by maresie
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.