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beyond codependency
(Preview)
Hello all!
I recently read a post about the negativity dominating this board. I am new to the board and have been reading everyday and sometimes responding to posts. I have to agree with the earlier posting in that there does seem to be a lot of sadness on the board.&...
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sas
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8
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345
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Being me without you.(no offence)
(Preview)
Hi all,
Just though I would drop a line to let you all know that I will no longer be comming here.
It has become apparent to me that this place is one of the contributing factors of my depression, hearing all of you talk about your 'A's' with - in some cases compleate disgust, hatered and lothing.
I am...
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flumpy
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11
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463
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Fear - needing some ESH
(Preview)
Today I am feeling my mind racing again and I do not seem to be able to stop it. My A is still staying at his dad's house. We speak daily and I see him frequently, he even went to some of the boy's basketball games this past weekend. He is attending his meetings, going to his after care etc. I am trying to stay af...
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confused
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4
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385
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A Freinds B'day
(Preview)
Happy Birthday to our dear al-anon friend Bobump Lots and Lots of Well Wishes
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tea2
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10
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417
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believing in HP
(Preview)
I am struggling with the idea of believing in a HP.
I read posts where people turn things over to HP, HP speaks to them, etc.
I have been working on finding a spiritual path. I pray, but it mostly feels like I am talking to myself. I use a lot of affirmations, and that makes sense to me.&nbs...
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mollyann
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6
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334
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A GIANT LEAP FORWARD
(Preview)
Rather than responding to a situation, I caught myself "reacting " to it--------just as I had before I came to alanon. My first thought was I had taken a gaint step backwards. Then I stopped I laughed when I realized what I was doing. My next thought was I had taken a giant leap forward ...
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gardengal
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3
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290
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whatever i have 2 do to recover..i am gonna DO it!!!
(Preview)
i don't care if i get esh or not!! i am making my new year resolution to PRACTICE what i have learned!! and if i WRITE it enough, and SAY it enough, it will be implanted in my brain......PRACTICING all the GOOD stuff i have learned these past two...
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rosie light shines
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1
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310
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step work
(Preview)
Hi Everyone,
I missed my alanon meeting due tonight so I am posting this and going to call someone tomorrow from my group. Last week the presentation was on the seventh step and the presenter said that she found that the primary character defect she became willing to let go was the fact that she...
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Therese
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1
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351
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Board Negativity?
(Preview)
I just gotta say I think this Board rocks!!!!!
It seems that negativity seems to get so much attention, when in reality I rarely see negativity here. When it does come up, more times then not it is coming from a negative place in someone's heart and thier perception of a situation.
Mostly I...
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Christy
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7
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416
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How serious is this?
(Preview)
I'm not sure if this is the right place to post this question, or if I should post on the N/A forums....but for those of you who have some knowledge, I'll start with here. As told in other posts, my a daughter just got married and I have invited her new husband to stay with us until they get their own pl...
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WakingUp
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5
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329
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third f2f
(Preview)
well i went to my third f2f last night and enjoyed it. there were more people then last time when there was only three of us. i shared and i was so nervous i actually shook lol. but what made me share was the fact that what i had to say could help someone else. i also bought a book called how alanon works and i can...
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notsonew1111
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6
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289
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what do I say
(Preview)
ok well one of my friend'd mother is a drug addict, and she had just recently (like a week ago) got out of rehab she graduated and everything, and the DAY she got out, she went and did drugs and got arrested, and is now either looking at 5 years in prison or one year in jail and one year on probation... I know wh...
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Joycie
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3
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385
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Hard
(Preview)
Finally my husband wanted to have sex it has been along time. I wanted to do it as well. But when it came down to it I couldn't get in to it. I felt bad. I hope I didn't discourage him. (sorry about the content.) It has been a long time since we did it. I am the one that wants to do it all the time, but he doesn't. So t...
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nycbt
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7
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348
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step work board?
(Preview)
where oh where has the step work board gone?
oh where oh where can it be?
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ednaxray
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2
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302
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I saw my mom
(Preview)
I saw my mom yesterday. It was really good. I had some pics of my wedding and a few others remade and a few copies made of them. I gave her some copies and she was really happy. She's so small and frail though, needs some weight on her bones, but other than that she's okay. I...
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ragingchild
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3
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291
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ok i was in chat
(Preview)
But I really want to know why chat moves soooooo slow? I mean its hard to keep going with it being that slow!
I waited till the person speaking finished before I asked my question. I know I didnt put my "hand" up but wanted to know before I left. I cant hang around for that -- Edited by Barbara at 12:47, 2006...
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Barbara
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15
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817
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just for today
(Preview)
today was such a mess. the pms monster has shown up again lol. im lacking sleep and had to move two units today. they switched spots. thats right...every patient and everything in their rooms up two floors and vice versa. everyone was a nutcase. all day i said to myself just for today i can put up with this...
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notsonew1111
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1
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264
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Wasted
(Preview)
Wasted
by: Carrie Underwood
This song is by Carrie Underwood, and it is on her cd "Some Hearts" I have that Cd I heard this song, and I loved it, it reminded me of my A. Another song on that Cd was "Jesus take the wheel" which about her finding her higher power, to me those to songs clicked together, so I j...
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Joycie
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1
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340
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Newbie Needs Assistance
(Preview)
This is my first time here. Both of my parents are alcoholics. Mom, dad, brother and sister #1 live near Phoenix; sister #2 and I live near Chicago. Mom is 80, dad is 83 and very, very ill.
Any time I try to talk to my 2 older sisters (I am the ...
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BettyJane
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6
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356
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My most recent poem I wrote:I listen to my heart
(Preview)
I listen to my heart
I listen to the wind howling
Blowing away my hair
I know it is you
Telling me that you care
I feel your touch
I hear your voice
When all I have to do is make that one choice
Just to listen to my heart
I am throwing the dart...
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Lauren ashley
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4
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292
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Getting in touch with my insecurities
(Preview)
In my attempt to remain focused on my own issues, I’ve been thinking about feelings that have crept up on me since his alcoholism has reared its ugly head again.
I understand that I’m worrisome about things I cannot control and I’m insecure. I think these things have led to poor choic...
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Jule_cat21
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3
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292
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The "Pity Pot"
(Preview)
As you know my husband is in rehab. He's been ok, but today we talked about what would've happened EVENTUALLY, if he hadn't of gotten help. He acted surprised that I would've left him, although we had many many arguments prior to that and he packed up a couple of times. Now he's depressed and can't get pas...
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GSDGIRL36
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3
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3213
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daily reflections
(Preview)
Do something fun today. If you're relaxing, let yourself relax, without guilt, without worrying about the work that is undone. If you're with loved ones, let yourself love them, and let them love you. Let yourself feel close. Let yourself enjoy your work, for that can be pleasurable too. If you're do...
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elizabeth
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1
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2174
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Not a good day, but at least I'm sober
(Preview)
I'm beginning to see the meaning of 'living in the day' and the thing that comes to mind is I need to keep my emotions in the moment. The only emotions that count are the ones I'm feeling right now. Yesterday's are gone, and to relive the past ones does me no good (resentments), and tomorrow's are a w...
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UncleLou
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7
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369
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I Needed Chat Room - But....
(Preview)
I needed to "vent", and, hopefully, listen to other alanon members' views. Feel really down. Last thing I wanted to hear - you have been blacklisted. What? Why? I have only been in room half hour last night, could not get in the night before, why am I blacklisted?
My head knows it is something to do wi...
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Flora123
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14
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443
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Checking for Skid Marks
(Preview)
OK for those of you who are used to my warped sense of humor, I maybe have sucked you in w/ the Topic. For the rest of ya, I may have sucked you in w/ the Topic. ;)
I'm not quite sure how to describe my program right now. I don't know whether I'm allowing my A to push my buttons and I've come...
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bobump
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7
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409
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Emotional Struggle
(Preview)
I just got back from an al-anon meeting. It was a good one for me. For some reason I feel comfortable to share from my heart at this meeting. Last week all I did was cry at this meeting. I was worried about going back tonight but they accepted me with no hesitation. I shared tonight about how I am having troub...
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sandie123
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6
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317
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Disappointed with a friend
(Preview)
Hi everyone,
Hope you are all well...I am a bit disappointed with a friend of mine..she and I met in F2F al-anon meetings..and tnite we were on the phone..She has asked me how things were going with this man I have been seeing. I trusted in her as a friend and she put me down for ...
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Diane43
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5
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293
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i am growing by keeping it simple
(Preview)
Today's thought is:
Seeking growth
We are where we are for a reason. As long as that reason remains, we remain where we are. If we aren't where we think we should be, working the program will help us get to where our deepest self longs to be. This is growth.And growth is work. We must be willing to do t...
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rosie light shines
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2
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252
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Just checking in....
(Preview)
Hi all,
Thanks to everyone for making me feel so welcome. It sure is nice to have a space to feel safe in.
I thought I would share something that happened today that I found funny, because the (recovering) alcoholic in my life is my partner. I told her about this board and that I'm going back to f2f...
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greeneyedgirl
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1
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254
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I'm fine!
(Preview)
((((((((((((((Hello family)))))))))))))))))),
I just called the surgeon about my biopsies I had on Friday. I'M FINE! It is a good thing when the surgeon, the nurse and I were laughing in the procedure room so hard that we had to sto...
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Karilynn
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8
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469
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a new view...
(Preview)
I've at least 20# to lose. I don't want to be known as his fatty, but rather his wife who needs to lose 20#.
I'm trying so hard to see that in him. I'm not married to an alcoholic.........I'm married to a man who has alcoholism.
When I think of it this way, it makes me realize w...
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DeAnna
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3
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300
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kinder gentler chat room
(Preview)
If Principles are more important than anything, then healing is what we ought to be focused on. If someone comes into chat they ought to be embraced when they are reaching out, having a nervous breakdown or are feeling hopeless or suicidal, not told, "to go away" as I have witnesse...
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kitty
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7
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385
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taking care of me - update
(Preview)
Hello Everyone,
Over the holidays during my alone time I decided to do some nice things for myself. I didn't call them resolutions because that sounds like work, these are not work just refocus and care for me. So it is the New take care of me thing I guess.
I went back to work on the friend's house toda...
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Jennifer
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2
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356
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Another Blow
(Preview)
Who else can I tell? Only you who understand.
Yesterday my a daughter got married. (Thank you all for prayers & good thoughts.) Today I find out from a neighbor (to whom she tells EVERYTHING) that my new son-in-law has violated probation and the police are looking for him! AND he's...
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WakingUp
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8
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380
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Question about my drinking
(Preview)
Hello Everyone,
Maybe this is an odd topic but I am a little off balance about this. Due to my feelings about alcohol which have ranged from disgust to outright hatred for the last few years, I would be surprised if I had imbibed in more than 10 drinks in the last 4 years. I have never had a problem with alc...
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Jennifer
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8
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422
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Dreams
(Preview)
I keep having the same type of dreams when it comes to my ex - and they are all centered around the same topic. I have had maybe 8 dreams about him since we broke up - and this morning I had one. I dreamt that I wanted him to call me and we were still sort of dating but he was acting funny. Fina...
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Cyn
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4
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307
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I could use some advice
(Preview)
Hi everyone,
I know where not supposed to give advice here, but I could really use some.
For anyone who doesn't know my siituation. My Father In Law passed away the end of January. My husband is an alcoholic, and his Dad had always been a very strong enabler. My husband has never had to stand on his own...
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Jeannie
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6
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337
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Thank you and update
(Preview)
Hello all:
Thank you all for your continued support. The outpouring of of care and concern was overwhelming and I think you from the bottom of my heart. I though hard on many of your posts and that my ability to be there for my Dad starts with me being in the right state of mi...
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Kim
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4
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395
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New and reaching out
(Preview)
I'm new to this message board and am forcing myself to write, I'm such a good isolator that I'd just lurk here if not..
I came into recovery through the doors of alanon and acoa, but have gotten away from the program in the last couple of years, and realize how much my life is out of control and unmanage...
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greeneyedgirl
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12
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540
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And then theres hope
(Preview)
Hi Gals and Guys
It's been awhile since i have been on. I had many things happend in my life which turned it into crisis mode. My best friend lost her leg in a car accident in November which completly messed me up. I was just so thankful that god took her leg but spared her lif...
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bd
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4
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277
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KATHY S.
(Preview)
HEY KATHY>>I NEED TO TALK TO YOU>>PLEASE IM ME>>>>ASAP...I LOVE YA
lauren~
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Lauren ashley
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0
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213
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Less Co-Dependent Today
(Preview)
I realised on NYD, that I cannot (& should, not) talk to my mother about my feelings anymore. The first chance I got to talk to her, was Friday & I told her all of my thoughts... that "since she isn't compassionate towards herself nor does she want to face her own feelings, how can I e...
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kitty
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4
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395
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moving on...........daily reflections
(Preview)
Learn the art of acceptance. It's a lot of grief. --Codependent No More Sometimes, as part of taking care of ourselves, it becomes time to end certain relationships. Sometimes, it comes time to change the parameters of a particular relationship. This is true in love, in friends...
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elizabeth
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4
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5919
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dilemma
(Preview)
I have a dilemma. My A created this mess, and he did it sober. He does it all the time too.
Anyway, he told his mom, who lives in Oklahoma, and who he does not have close relationship with (there are some issues there that I can't even get into b/c I don't even know the full extent of them, but I do know she has...
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lilleah
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6
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304
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Take the Wheel
(Preview)
Has anyone heard that song called "Take The Wheel"? It's a country song, don't know who sings it, about a woman letting her "higher power" take on her burden. It's really wonderful. Anyway, just wanted to share some thoughts on my giving up my own "wheel". It's so hard to give it up isn't it? We are all so d...
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GSDGIRL36
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6
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283
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plan plans, not results....
(Preview)
Understanding that we do not have the power to control the results of our plans is an important step toward accepting reality. We do make plans, based on the information, experience, and insight which we have available to us. The outcome of our plans, however, is dependent on circumstances, which ar...
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elizabeth
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0
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236
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For Barbara
(Preview)
((((Barbara)))),
I understand how frustrated you must feel at your recent attempts to get answers in the meeting room. As many had stated in your initial post the room format is there for everyone to follow as it is in f2f meetings.
If you are interested in going to the Convention I wi...
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AlaMom
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3
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318
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amanda's competition is today
(Preview)
I am so excited today is amanda's first valerette competition (KICK LINE & DANCING ) they compete against different schools and can win tropheys. these girls have been practicing very hard. we have been up since 630 am. chuck is going i am so happy & so is amanda's d...
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chrissy
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3
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292
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Don't Quit
(Preview)
Hi everyone. I got this from a friend of mine and wanted to share.
Don't Quit
When things go wrong, as they sometimes will
When the road your're trudging seems all up hill
When the funds are low, and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is p...
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Diane43
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2
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288
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If "James" can get better w/out a program, why cant we?
(Preview)
Im reading James Frey's A Million Little Pieces. He's talking about how he doesnt believe in AA, doesnt need the Steps. Ive seen him on Oprah. If he can get better w/out a 12step program why cant everyone? Or was the Tao (?) his program? This may be part of the reason Im questioning AlAnon.
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Barbara
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17
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625
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Commenting on growth
(Preview)
Tonight on the board the subject came up, after comments on someones growth within this program, that the comments may have been a judgement of a person's growth rather than a pat on the back (which I know was the intent). I was blown away that there could be heat off this. I know there are ot...
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Lunamoth
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5
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892
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Heavens Grocery Store
(Preview)
I was walking down life's highway, a long time ago. One day I saw a sign that read "HEAVEN'S GROCERY STORE"
As I got a little loser, the door came open widen and when I came to myself I ws standing inside. I saw a host of ANGELS. They were everywhere. One handed me a basket and said, "My Child, shop wi...
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missylost
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2
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304
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am i a victim?? or volunteer???
(Preview)
Hope for Today - January 9 Before Al-Anon I allowed the behaviors of thealcoholics in my life to cause me great unhappiness. While it was true I was suffering, was my pain reallytheir fault? Al-Anon has taught me to take responsibility for my own happiness.Early in my recovery, I called my sponsor b...
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rosie light shines
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0
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389
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wow!!! i am learning, i am LEARNING!!!!
(Preview)
MONDAY , JANUARY 09, 2006
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning </OA_HTML/ibeCCtpItmDspRte.jsp?item=1098>.
The Chinese say that water is the most powerful element, because it is perfectly nonresistant. It can wear away a rock and sweep all before it. --Florence S...
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rosie light shines
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0
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258
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Expectations of others.......
(Preview)
Daily reflections: Expectations of others....
It is our job to identify our needs, and then determine a balanced way of getting those needs met. We ultimately expect our Higher Power and the Universe - not one particular person - to be our source. It is unreasonable to expect anyone t...
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elizabeth
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2
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554
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Letting God
(Preview)
So this morning my roommate and I had a yard sale. I need to earn the money towards a deposit on a new place. I could have been super stressed during the sale but wasn't. Before we started I took time to pray and leave the results in God's hands. Well, today had good results.&nbs...
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angelinme908
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4
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378
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my prediction
(Preview)
well my a somewhat made it one week but i can see his attitude changing quickly. this week he went to two aa meetings and one addictions counsellor meeting and we covered alot. he even speant some extra time with the old timers. yesterday at his moms he took one toke from a joint. i said im ready to go and tol...
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notsonew1111
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4
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348
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dealing with chaos
(Preview)
My boyfriend and I have a mail box that is at th end of town (about half a mile from our house). For some reason, I dunno what (and at this moment I don't care what either), the post office does not deliver in our area, and we have to have a mailbox. So one or the other of us goes to get the mail daily. ...
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maresie
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6
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440
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Confused and trying to learn
(Preview)
I am having a very hard time with a lot going on in my life right now. My husband finally went into detox almost 2 months ago and I thought some of my insanity would get better. I was so tired of the worry....hiding keys, hiding money, wondering where he was and if he was coming home. The...
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LALA1
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7
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351
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