|
|
trying to walk the talk
(Preview)
happy new year everyone
so i am trying so hard to focus on me and take care of me and my life while A boyfriend is away at rehab getting sober, but it is HARD WORK. getting doctors and dentist appointment for me and the kids, having fun with them (we flew a kite today and the joy in their eyes...ahhh), seein...
|
Fifi
|
10
|
461
|
|
|
|
A Healing Moment!
(Preview)
Wow, this really is a rollercoaster! I mean just the other nite I was here saying "why do we do this?" But even before that post I had asked for some suggestions on helping my 12 year old son cope. See, my son had not experienced the effects of alcoholism until I married my husba...
|
Spiritually Calm
|
0
|
173
|
|
|
|
Newbie
(Preview)
Any one out there want to be a sponsor for a newbie????
|
rita
|
1
|
217
|
|
|
|
New Here
(Preview)
Hi everyone. My name is Rose married to an A and have a beautiful 3 1/2 yr old son. I feel like I am losing my mind at times. My A was sober for so many years and we decided to have a baby. Ever since my son was born my A has gone from good to bad to worse the older my son gets. My A also suffers from depression/anxiet...
|
Rose
|
9
|
359
|
|
|
|
wishes and dreams
(Preview)
Hi everyone,
You have to have a dream in order to make the dream come true.
I was in the car with my nine year old neice and three year old nephew. She asked me what I would wish for if I was granted one wish. This got me thinking....
She said she would wish people would stop eating animals!!! (st...
|
annmarie
|
8
|
415
|
|
|
|
addiction vs. alcoholism
(Preview)
i do believe addiction is addiction is addiction. but, my ex is a crack addict/alcoholic. i have heard of very,very few crack addicts maintaining sobriety for any real length of time. seems that 3 years is average. my ex went about 3 years every time and then his relapses lasted (on average) 18 months....
|
serendipity
|
3
|
354
|
|
|
|
A's marijuana use is increasing
(Preview)
(((Hello MIP family)))
I hope each of you had a great Holiday. I enjoyed my time off from work. The kids and I had a good time together going to the parks, playing with their new toys, and just resting.
The biggest struggle these days is getting on the same page with my AH about par...
|
twinmom2
|
9
|
943
|
|
|
|
I keep Wanting to start an argument...
(Preview)
It had all been going so well....too well probably that I hadn't seen this coming. Before my A went into rehab I was working my programme (still am) and for the first time in a long time come to terms, or so I thought, with detachment. He was very actively drinking but I felt like I was getting...
|
bear
|
6
|
383
|
|
|
|
Making Changes
(Preview)
If you have always been afraid of change then making changes doesn't feel so wonderful. I am a creature of habit. I don't like change. Even as a child going to the next grade level gave me anxiety because it was a new teacher, new kids, etc. My AH has always been in constant chan...
|
twinmom2
|
2
|
282
|
|
|
|
I feel so much better
(Preview)
It's funny how much things have changed since I first came here. I have known for many years that even when it seems like the end of the world things get better and life goes on usually for the better. I have been genuinely happy lately. I don't think about my AH nearly so much any more d...
|
carolinagirl
|
4
|
254
|
|
|
|
Back from trip and ready to go
(Preview)
Hello to all!!
You were missed, but I've been very busy and for the most part had a wonderful time! We had a safe trip up to New Jersey and back, we had a great time with my family--yes I think even my husband can say that! We went to New York City and saw the sights--oh I didn't think my legs wou...
|
hudsond
|
4
|
232
|
|
|
|
Remind me why we do this?
(Preview)
I'm really struggling right now with why on earth I put myself and my son through this mind game ... the mind game of alcoholism. It's never easy, there's nothing simple about it. Right now, I can't understand why I spend the time trying to stay one step ahead of the game, always having to th...
|
Spiritually Calm
|
6
|
604
|
|
|
|
She understands now... and it breaks my heart.
(Preview)
(((((Everyone)))))
I haven't posted much over the holiday week. I have been off and mostly hit the boards from my office, so it's been tough to get on.
All and all the holidays have been a blessing. The kids and I have had a great time, but Mom (my AW) is a whole different story.
I calle...
|
rtexas
|
11
|
603
|
|
|
|
Sueing a spouse?
(Preview)
I have a question. I live in a home that is in my husbands name. If I file for divorce and he refuses to sell and would rather have it taken (foreclosed) can I do anything to take ownership since he is an alcoholic? Anyone had this issue?
My husband uses financial control over me, just wondering what you t...
|
Friendofyours
|
9
|
511
|
|
|
|
Agree 100% wit Ditto
(Preview)
"Anyway, when I started to think clearly, when I put my needs first, when I realized I was grieving for something that didn’t exist, I was able to let go. A friend put it very succinctly to me when he said: “you mean you are afraid to let go of something that you d...
|
Rebecca
|
1
|
196
|
|
|
|
Missing Persons......
(Preview)
anyone see or hear from Twinmom lately?
i havent seen a post from her in a while, since she got married actually.....
.hope she is o.k. anyone hear from her?
|
Rebecca
|
3
|
346
|
|
|
|
Dolphin?
(Preview)
Has anyone heard from Dolphin?
|
marmare
|
1
|
218
|
|
|
|
twinmom2 ??
(Preview)
thank you for responding to my "New Here" message as well as everyone else.
I just wanted to write you since you since you also have 3 1/2 yr old twins. I just don't want my son to experience this anymore. i hate that fact that he hears us argue about As' drinking. He even has asked my A recently, what happe...
|
Rose
|
4
|
237
|
|
|
|
Gaaa! I'm applying to graduate school!
(Preview)
Gaaaa! I'm applying to graduate school!
You'd think it was Harvard. You'd think I was going to MIT. You'd think I was packing up my things and moving half way across the world to the University of Timbuktu. But no.
Wright State. School of Graduate Studies. Colle...
|
Tiger2006
|
16
|
468
|
|
|
|
Email from A...ERRRRRRRRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!
(Preview)
Thank you,
I just got another offer for that G company the Christain guy who wanted to hire me away from M and G.
Listen, I want you back. I am making the effort not to date anyone because my sponcer says I shouldn't. You have to tell me what you want. Because I know you are trying to get dates onlin...
|
carolinagirl
|
8
|
501
|
|
|
|
Looking at friendships that harm me
(Preview)
I've been friends with someone since high school. A couple years ago, she hit bottom with her alcoholism. I remember all the blaming I was given by deciding to end the friendship because of the many broken promises. She had introduced me to someone years ago and we started dating. He would constantly b...
|
kissers
|
3
|
368
|
|
|
|
Not Drinking and I am still angry
(Preview)
So I have been relieved that AH has not been drinking but I find
that I am still angry and frightened whether he is or isn't. If he is eating loudly I feel angry at his eating loudly.
I blame the irritation on him but I need to take a look at myself. (Although it seems...
|
renah
|
5
|
412
|
|
|
|
don't read this because I don't exist
(Preview)
Hello MIP,
I am not having a good day.Maybe this is alanon related,maybe not.I just need to reach out.I need to know that I really do exist somewhere for someone.My AH,soon to be ex, would say I am feeling sorry for myself.Maybe I am.But I say I am facing a reality about my life that I have b...
|
drucilla06
|
25
|
811
|
|
|
|
Your experience, strength and hope.
(Preview)
I just wanted to tell all of you how much you are helping me with your es&h. I am a long time member of alanon but I have been away for several years. I am reading your posts and I am so glad that I came here. You are ALL beautiful to me.
|
kclady
|
4
|
270
|
|
|
|
Hello!
(Preview)
Hello Everyone!
For some unknown reason I am unable to enter the chatroom, no matter what way I try to come in. This is working for me, so I thought I would let you all know I am still around, trying patiently to get into the room. I miss you all! If anyone knows how I can get into chat it would b...
|
Raven
|
22
|
985
|
|
|
|
Question for the double winners
(Preview)
Hi,
This may seem like a silly question but I have seen enough of this in the last bit to wonder.
The A in my life smokes an enormous amount of pot. I would say anywhere in between 8 and 12 times a day. Even when she does not drink or is trying to quit drinking she still continues to smoke up bu...
|
lilms
|
7
|
540
|
|
|
|
Reconnecting with oneself
(Preview)
(((((((((((Family)))))))),
Happy New Year! We had a great online meeting this morning. It got me thinking about what we want to do for ourselves this year. Now I'm not talking about working our program, getting healthier etc. Don't get me wrong these are all great things to do.
What I am ta...
|
Karilynn
|
5
|
506
|
|
|
|
FOR DIVA
(Preview)
Diva,
Do I need to say more?????
lilms
|
lilms
|
1
|
237
|
|
|
|
I'm not sure what to do
(Preview)
I know that I have spent way too much time on this over the weekend and took the focus off of myself but I just don't know what to do. I got off early on Friday before my husband. Well, I was on the phone about my internet with comcast so my husband called me on my cell phone and ask where I was at.&n...
|
FairyTales
|
8
|
428
|
|
|
|
Dilemma
(Preview)
I feel hopeless right now and was wondering what to do. I'm recently separated from my A. It's been a long road and through a year of al-anon I've managed to try and treat him with respect and kindness and I've let go of most of the anger. I'm obviously not perfect in this area, but there has been a huge chang...
|
jennifer9
|
8
|
315
|
|
|
|
talking out loud about an alanoner coming alive
(Preview)
I am struggling to keep my home. I am at the point where i am thinking about what I plan to do. decided since my last learning experience I am in a new chapter of my life. I have to find who i am again and what I really want.
Been experiencing things I am tired of. When I depend on me I am much happier. When I don'...
|
debilyn
|
12
|
518
|
|
|
|
abusive son
(Preview)
Now my son has gone bonkers. He is bi polar. The last two days he has called and been awful. Sounding so like the A when he emotionally abused me.
When he called last night I was shocked how awful he was. Does not cuss much but any is too much for me. I won't go into it.
I immediately told my self it is his dis...
|
debilyn
|
9
|
410
|
|
|
|
Inlaws who needs 'em
(Preview)
I am brand new into Alanon I haven't even went to my first meeting yet I actually went to an AA meeting with my husband and was approached by two different women about Alanon so I decided I would try it out. My problem is that I am having a very hard time right now with my husband being in jail and my family diso...
|
mgeneralpatton
|
7
|
323
|
|
|
|
hp knows when i'm ready
(Preview)
i haven't spoken to my ex inlaws in years now. i saw my sil and mil on christmas eve but i didn't speak to them nor they to me and i was fine with that. i actually let it go and really didn't give them any thought at all which is huge progress for me. but my ex sil called the other day and left a message for me to call...
|
serendipity
|
3
|
267
|
|
|
|
Found a meeting
(Preview)
I found a meeting, tomorrow night at 7:00, I can walk to it (about a mile, but I love to walk). I don't want my H to know about it. Is that normal? To tell the truth, I've been terrified that we would find these posts, I even had a nightmare about it. I just feel like I have been so broken down that I need to rebuil...
|
RainyJamie
|
5
|
361
|
|
|
|
Year 2 of the Year of Me
(Preview)
Today begins the second Year of Jill, 2 of 7. I wrote about this a year ago. I realized all our attention had been on my active A husband for the 7 years we’d known each other, and I claimed the next 7 for myself. It’s not easy! I have his complete agreement. He has written me two songs for the Year of Jill, and w...
|
Jill
|
5
|
307
|
|
|
|
A good share
(Preview)
I want to share with you all the miracles that are happening in my life. The following was sent to me by a member of the group I chair at our church. She came into the group saying that she did not believe in God. I told her that she didn't have to and for the time being she could use mine as h...
|
Mobirdie
|
0
|
246
|
|
|
|
Am I doing the wrong thing?
(Preview)
I am new to the program. My boyfriend is my A. I'm trying to learn how to stop enabling him, so I'm reading a ton of stuff. So many things I'm reading say not to let the A drive when under the influence. This morning about 3 am, my boyfriend came to bed, obviously drunk. When our alarm went off at...
|
abryann
|
9
|
452
|
|
|
|
Another DUI - Happy New Year!
(Preview)
Happy New Year (almost).
I just got off the phone with the police. My AH was taken to the hospital by ambulance a short time ago. When he sobers up, he'll be charged with DUI again. After hitting a telephone pole and bouncing off a parked car, he made it home, only to pass out in the dr...
|
lmw
|
9
|
469
|
|
|
|
Words (how we see them)
(Preview)
Language can be a fascinating thing. One single word can have so many different meanings depending on how it is said, who is reading it, what context it is used in, and so on. One word can be positive to one person, yet negative to another. Why do you suppose that is? I rather suspect it has to do with our own...
|
kismetstrand
|
1
|
323
|
|
|
|
my mantra
(Preview)
happy new year everyone
for me i think this year is truly going to be new...me focusing on new ways of handling my emotions,my relationships,new ways of reaching out for the help i need, new ways of trusting myself and being wrecked by the momentary difficulties, new ways of saying no and knowing t...
|
Fifi
|
9
|
507
|
|
|
|
All the other addictions
(Preview)
After our last blowout my husband made an effort not to drink (it lasted about 36 hours). What stood out for me were the other behaviors that hte alcohol covered up. We have been married for ten years and there has always been something semi-destrucive he was engulfed in. We've had issues with pornogra...
|
RainyJamie
|
3
|
745
|
|
|
|
Welcoming a new Day and a New year
(Preview)
A friend in recovery just gave this to me. Thought it would be
a great way to start the New Year and Day for All
Please enjoy and have a Wonderful New Year!!
This is from a daily affirmation book:
Today I have a fresh start. I choose to begin a new letting go of un...
|
mmerlino
|
1
|
319
|
|
|
|
Prayers please?
(Preview)
(((Family)))
I'm asking for extra prayers for my nephew Joey, he is my husband's oldest sister's boy. He is in critical condition at this time.
After begging for his life and telling the robber he had 3 kids and a wife, when he turned around to get the money the *&*^%#^&** shot him in the back. Then...
|
Christy
|
35
|
933
|
|
|
|
a funeral and a house fire
(Preview)
I went to a funeral on Saturday. So much has been stuck in my head since.
Was this person an A? I don't know. I do know that he died alone, and that he was dead for almost 3 days before anyone found him. I do know that he drank what I consider too much but I think my opinion may be ske...
|
lilms
|
12
|
473
|
|
|
|
Update
(Preview)
I was off work for a good long time for the holiday and haven't been on lately. I just wanted to give an update. I haven't been to f2f meetings lately I'm just really not excited by the group here and there are no others nearby. The A came over for xmas and stayed two nights. When I...
|
carolinagirl
|
1
|
223
|
|
|
|
new beginnings
(Preview)
Hi everyone, happy new year...new beginnings!
I left my Abf a few weeks ago. I had no choice, his drinking was getting worse and worse. I had to get away and have now severed all ties. He's stopped calling anyway, and stopped pretending we could be friends. I suppose we tried to remain friends so as t...
|
annmarie
|
1
|
223
|
|
|
|
New Years Eve
(Preview)
I was wondering if all people were a bit worried because it is New Years Eve-and all the drinking etc. I hope and pray no one is killed by drunken drivers and everyone is safe. Does anyone else have abit of apprehension about tonite?
|
meagain
|
4
|
365
|
|
|
|
I started the new year bringing up old stuff. Wrong?
(Preview)
Did I do the wrong thing? I decided I wanted to make this year different than this by opening up a disussion with my A about what's been going on with us these past 3 mos. I did not intend to have a big disussion really - I just wanted to open the door so we can deal with it little by little si...
|
jaja
|
1
|
233
|
|
|
|
LOL...... History
(Preview)
december the 30th 2006 will be marked in the annals of history as the day i LOL.
today will be marked as the day COL [cried out loud]
neither is done very often. maybe never.
we had an incident here today and i did cry out loud.
he asked me sarcastically "what is the point"?
i replied, "the point i...
|
jewely
|
2
|
243
|
|
|
|
One year and a few months ago.....
(Preview)
I came here Sept/Oct of 2005 a wreck and felt alone and confused. Once I stumbled upon this wonderful population of people like me, I didn't feel alone anymore. I came here with hard earned knowledge of what alcohol can do and came equipped with emotional scars and still gaping wou...
|
ragingchild
|
0
|
202
|
|
|
|
Taking a stand
(Preview)
I started formulating a plan for myself. It has been 2 years since my AHsober said he was outta here and wanted a divorce. No papers filled as of yet. He threatens and I think that that is part of his game. He lies, withholds info, forgets, won't introduce me to his new friends, and has made some really poor...
|
nmike
|
2
|
340
|
|
|
|
Want to talk to someone in similiar situation
(Preview)
Hi,
This is my first time posting on here. I've been with my husband for 9 yrs. We have 2 children together and he has 2 from a previous relationship. When I met him, he was 28 and an active alcoholic. We would go out together in the beginning and I would drink with him. I...
|
Divinity
|
6
|
320
|
|
|
|
Lesson on Living, Loving and Growing
(Preview)
I was thought I would share something positive with you, some of my experience, strength and *hope that I am now reflecting on. I feel this it is part of my healing by being able to do so after my last vent update here. My son turned 17 December 4th. I will gloat a bit too with this – I admit I have a knack for giv...
|
tea2
|
10
|
592
|
|
|
|
To clarify about my A and I--need some help on how to fix it.
(Preview)
I reposted to my post a bit back about my A supposed to be having his sister come get him. She never came. My therapist is telling me not to call his sisters back to get him unless I like the drama. I want him out. I need to find a way. When he goes back to work, he said if the door was locked he would beat it down. Ma...
|
hippietrippiechick
|
1
|
335
|
|
|
|
MY NEW YEAR
(Preview)
For New years eve me and my husband spent are time inside watching the ball drop. He has been sober since the summer which life has been great. But it hasn't always been that way, there have been some new years eve that he was so drunk I end up leaving him and going to my friends house and stayed over night bec...
|
nycbt
|
3
|
227
|
|
|
|
Taking a break from here
(Preview)
Since today is Jan 1st, I have decided to take an Internet break from both this board and the chatroom, which at times I find to be addictive and think it best from my mental and emotional as well as physical health to not spend so much time with my head in front of the computer and not being productive in oth...
|
DanaAngel
|
1
|
323
|
|
|
|
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! BLESSINGS TO YOU ALL...
(Preview)
Just wanted to wish you all a very Happy New Year, and wonderful blessings as well. It's hard to type because I punctured my pointer finger Friday with a piece of sharp wood on the tip...sigh...lol. It's looks like it is festering, so I will keep an eye on it. Anyway, I'...
|
lmt123
|
2
|
216
|
|
|
|
amends, or however you spell it..
(Preview)
one day last spring i got out of the room..and decided for my mental health..i couldnt come back for awhile. i was tormented..i was loosing sleep, and finding myself pissed ..half the times i came ..and not caring for myself well... looking at a bad mole on my neck wondering if i had cancer...
|
ednaxray
|
13
|
1063
|
|
|
|
HAPPY NEW YEAR
(Preview)
Hi everyone
I would like to wish everyone a happy new year. Just want you guys to rember that we no longer are alone that we are a family and that we have each other. I know some of you don't think you have someone right now, but you do you have the people here on line. don't forget about us. When you feel lone...
|
nycbt
|
0
|
188
|
|