I came here Sept/Oct of 2005 a wreck and felt alone and confused.  Once I stumbled upon this wonderful population of people like me, I didn't feel alone anymore.  I came here with hard earned knowledge of what alcohol can do and came equipped with emotional scars and still gaping wounds.  Now I feel more in control of my emotions and can open up a lot more than I used to.  I still use these tools, although I admit that I sometimes slip from time to time and the old self tries to come back through.  I still have problems that I'm dealing with from my sexual abuse, but I don't really know if I have the guts to face that just yet.  Maybe someday.  One year ago, I decided to visit my mom (my A) after 3 years of not speaking to/seeing her.  Now we are working at our relationship again.  We see each other more now, but not as much as I'd like, but I still see her and spend quality time with her.  This time last year I was really afraid of what visiting her would do to me, but to my surprise she was quite pleasant and sober.  If I hadn't stumbled on this site, I don't know where I'd be today.  Probably still highly stressed and angry beyond limits.  I still have anger, but not about the alcohol part but about the sexual abuse I suffered at the hands of a family member.  I know that I've come a long way from sept/oct '05.  My husband can live in relative peace now, LOL!  When I get upset I'll tell him whether its him or something/someone else, then talk about it.  I have changed for the better and I don't ever want to go back to the person I was.  I was a very angry, bitter, and depressed person.  Now I am more happy and outgoing than I have been.  I hope to change even more this year.  Maybe face some issues/kinks that I have to iron out, but haven't been wanting to face or accept.  Who knows what the new year brings, but hopefully it will be filled with blessings and miracles.  Happy New Year to all and I hope you had a wonderful holiday season!! 

RC