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Im walking on eggshells
(Preview)
My AH has been sober since Tues. He is retired now so has nothing but time to drink all day while I work. My daughter is really becoming disgusted with the home front and has said she wants to move out. She is a Junior in college and I want her to continue to do well in school. I worry that this will be harder if s...
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cookie1971
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8
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712
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Sponsorship
(Preview)
Hi Family, Someone asked a question about sponsorship. A program friend gave these to me a couple of years ago and I have posted this before but thought I would again! I hope they are useful.---------David SPONSORSHIP -What It Is and What It Isn't Four major points in sponsorship that most Twelve Step...
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david62
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0
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337
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Learning to let go, the hard way
(Preview)
Hello my family of choice, Not to long ago I burnt my hand, could have been worse, but was by far the worse burn I have ever had. I was boiled some water in the microwave at work. I was pouring the water into my container and the container tipped, I reached for it, caught it, but poured boiling water over my ha...
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Mandy123
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10
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644
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home sweet home
(Preview)
We made it home alive! Just came in from Orlando today and of course I'm sick... My middle child was sick about the 2nd day and passed the joy along to me! I have a cold/cough thing that is horrible. Luckily I have tomorrow off work so I'm hoping I'll be fully recovered by Tuesday when it's time to go bac...
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carolinagirl
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5
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446
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Is this true?
(Preview)
I have heard that alcohol withdrawl is the only withdrawl that can kill a person. I believe I heard this from an A. It might have even been in conversation about a heroine addict withdrawl and how they can't die from withdrawl from herione or any substance other than alcohol. Anybody know if this is true...
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serendipity
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5
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629
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acceptance
(Preview)
I am working overtime not to know where the A is or get involved in any of his stuff. His court stuff has been continued. I have really worked hard not to know what is going on. He is out of where he is living. I have really worked hard not to know where he is. I believe he may be living in the car he acquired. I do n...
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maresie2
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1
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267
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I am still here
(Preview)
Hello everyone. I feel like I am a poser or a wannabe aloner because I guess I stopped trying. I mean, I found alanon almost a year ago and took some itty bitty baby steps into it, but I felt like I hit a wall and alot of it was just me but basically I am still right where I left off, standing at the base of a wall. A...
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RainyJamie
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5
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439
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coming home
(Preview)
i haven't been here since july of 2003, i think. i had to go back to work and was unable to get to the online meetings that meant so much to my sanity. after only being back to work for 3 months, i started having major health problems and with the advice of my dr. i resigned and filed for social security disa...
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Red1017
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4
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435
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Bein gin no contact with the A
(Preview)
It is now like 4/5 days since I had contact with the A. I have no idea where he is or what he is doing. I do know he has money and transportation (which is more than I have). I have moments when I worry about hiim and the state of his mental health. There are other days when I feel really free of him for the first ti...
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maresie2
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2
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445
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letting go
(Preview)
The A is now less than 23hours away from his court date. I cam certain he is going to get jail time. I am at peace with that. On the weekend he showed up to claim his tools. I said nothing, no remonstration about what he eneded to do, where he was, what he was doing. If he wants his tools he can have them.
He has...
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maresie2
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2
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377
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sad about neighbours
(Preview)
i just wanted to share to help me with my boundaries. my neighbours are suffering the effects of addiction. there is serious violence and chaos in their home..... it reminds me how lucky i am to have found this program. i have spoken to the mom about the program, but she is not open to it at the moment. for...
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florrie
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5
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413
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Despair
(Preview)
I am desparately looking for the way forward, knowing that my heart is broken again, and I feel that I am losing myself. I was married to a voilent alcoholic for twenty years. I thought that I had recovered after being afiliated to an alanon support group when we lost our home due to alcoholism. But a r...
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Heartbroken
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15
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805
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Funny stories
(Preview)
I was catching up on the forum posts and ran across Karilyn's funny stories. The other day my AH was lamenting about his habit of having to know everybody's business. His saying lately is "stick my nose back on my face". So he catches himself at it again and says something about it "jus...
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Jen
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2
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463
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RE: Waiting for the other shoe.
(Preview)
Sorry it took me a bit to respond to my post from yesterday. I wanted to be sure you all know how much I appreciate your input. Christy- Your positive attitude is infectious. I am feeling very numb for the moment when it comes to intimacy of any kind. My A is really starting to open up wonderfully, and I can...
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Jen
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2
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320
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My Confession
(Preview)
My CONFESSION It started out innocently enough. I began to think at parties now and then -- just to loosen up. Inevitably, though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker. I began to think alone -- "to relax," I told myself -- but I knew it wasn't true. Thinkin...
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david62
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6
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711
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so lost
(Preview)
my AH just went awol. i definitely don't have these alanon principles down. i'm totally worried, i can't stand feeling out of control like this. i'm waiting by the phone and jumping every time i hear someone in the apartment hallway. i should be used to this by now but i am not. he vacillates between deni...
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que sara
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9
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367
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Waiting for the other shoe.
(Preview)
I don't really know what I want to say. I've been feeling kind of weird lately. Like I'm living on auto pilot. Not long ago I was feeling really scared at the idea of living by myself. Winters here are not easy. I had no firewood and a dangerously deteriorated woodstove. I had not nearly enough hay in for th...
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Jen
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4
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501
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Time to git'r done
(Preview)
I have been in north Idaho long enough for this little slogan to not make me want to throw up anymore :D. When I lived in San Diego, it would have been the Nike slogan: Just Do It! It's been four months yesterday since my exA has been off the farm and out of my immediate life. The first month was just blessed...
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Kim65
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8
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562
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relationships...
(Preview)
Hi, I came in here a little bit a few months ago, and go to chat on occasion.... but haven't posted much or kept up with things on the message board... Well, I don't really know if this goes with Alanon.... or if it's an Alkie thing.... or something else... but I need to hear some ES&H... I have th...
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LisaF
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3
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439
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hope you appreciate my humor
(Preview)
Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; and Patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death. AMEN
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Maria123
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14
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631
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(((((((Luna))))))))
(Preview)
Everything ok over there? Just letting you know we are thinking about you.... Take care of you!
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rtexas
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3
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366
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dream / prayer request
(Preview)
Hi hi all, Dream / Prayer request - anon style. Say it like that: someone has heart problems and in hsp now. Not sure of what - irr heartbeat - appx 60 something. Family has asked me to put the individual on our prayer list, so that's about all I can say about that re our anon scripts that get run in our chat r...
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getoverit
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3
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202
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Canceled the family session
(Preview)
Just wanted to tell y'all that I canceled the family session. After talking about it with my therapist, she emphasized--girl scout salute and everything--that we could do it at a later time. She was concerned that my parents would use the opportunity to launch into a "You won't believe how men...
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Tiger2006
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6
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471
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Confused about how to help... need esh
(Preview)
Hi everyone.. I am grateful to find a place to put down my words about my situation, knowing it will be treated with respect and perhaps some recognition of the emotions I am going through!! A couple of years ago, my kids and I moved across the country to the west coast of Canada. We left all our family behi...
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inspired2
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4
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520
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Being Proud of myself
(Preview)
For the first time in quit some time I actually proud of myself, I have set a few boundaries which have made me feel much better about myself. Last night AH came home, proceeded to attempt the nightly fight, and instead of allowing him to cuss me out and call me names I looked at him and said "when you c...
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CJC
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5
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630
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Sign of self care
(Preview)
As yo uall know I've been swallowed up in the A''s mess all summer long. This coming Monday I have a telephone interview for a job. I have just started applying. I am still looking for a 2nd job but I am also looking for a better full time job. I am so happy I have an interview it is a milepost in that I am taking c...
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maresie2
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7
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556
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Went to my first meeting.
(Preview)
So I went to my first Al-Anon meeting on Tuesday and actually went again on Wednesday. It became even more ackward because my friend and I actually went to the AA meeting on accident. We didn't know we were in the wrong room until they started and then had to ask them where the Al-Anon meeting was which was...
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loper410
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6
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528
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An Update
(Preview)
Well, my life continues. Im still around, havent been around much, my ex finally moved out, and now Im all alone with the kitty, not sure how much longer he will be around either. I thought to myself again, why do I need this? I thought about it, and thought about it, and came to the conclusion, it doesn't m...
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jrl
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4
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301
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acceptance
(Preview)
when I first moved to the place I am in now I beat myself into a smithereens for not having the money/connections/resources to move to an apartment. I certainly did not see it as an accomplishment that I managed to wrest the two dogs off the A. Neither did I see it as an accomplishment that I managed to move...
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maresie2
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3
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452
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Who was it that had a spine on loan???
(Preview)
I could really use it. ((((Everyone)))) It's been some time since I've posted. So much has gone on here. When I drew the "line in the sand" with my A and decided to push for a divorce he agreed for about 2 days then everything went to hell. My A and I have been living apart for 3 yrs now (wow, l...
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Lunamoth
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9
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521
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scared! need wisdom and suport
(Preview)
I had typed up everything below 3 times and tried to find the right board... well after having problems with registering and frustration I found this.... SIGH ( really HUGE SIGH)telling this so you know my mind set... not just in this but in so much in my life.....I was getting to the point that I was angr...
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broken
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16
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653
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Not another lying addict!!!
(Preview)
I was wondering how the rest of you handle the lying. Yes, I know that it is part of what an addict does, but should I say something when I know he is lying or do I just let it go. This is really frustrating me, because it seems to be getting worse. It used to be just lies when I would ask a question about someth...
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Denoraphy
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7
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701
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Boy is he a handful, and he's sober!
(Preview)
((((((((((Family))))))))), Okay I just have to share this with you. You just sometimes wonder WHAT ARE THEY THINKING? Oh that's right, he's sober and male! EUREKA! Well that's hubby yesterday and today. He's getting out his hunting gear yesterday afternoon and all of a sudden I hear what soun...
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Karilynn
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8
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701
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Taking a Break
(Preview)
Well, I'm taking a break from my break today LOL. We have been walking the theme parks for the past 3 days for about 7 or 8 hours a day. I'm not sure my feet can take another minute. My legs ache from the knee down, my arms hurt even my fingers were hurting this morning! I think we are gonna hang around the h...
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carolinagirl
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2
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308
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Lies lies and more lies
(Preview)
Lately I have found myself surrounded by people who lie. The A lied all the time, he brought people into our lives who lies chronically. Then the A moved to the only place he would accept to be and I agreed to help him be there in order to house the dogs (I had nowhere to put them). Those people also lied chron...
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maresie2
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4
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532
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A Little "Inner Guidance" Gift for all of you
(Preview)
Enjoy! http://www.innerguidancemovie.com/info_guid.htm
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kissers
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4
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683
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I Did It!
(Preview)
Hello All, This is a folllow-up to my post regarding my desire to encourage my ah to enter a Diversion Program on his own as to not be turned in and have his professional license flagged and possibly immediately lose it. Let me just say, I did it! First, I resolved myself to stopping the secret (with limi...
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Loupiness
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7
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556
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updated on Bubbles123
(Preview)
Hey (((((((((family)))))))) I just thought you all would like to know I am alive!!! I have been really busy with lifes ups and downs here lately.. I have been out of town for a few weeks with my hubby and kids. Had a Blast!!!! I am now back and getting ready to go into the hospital next week for surgery.. I am...
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bubbles1990
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9
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472
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What Other People Think of Me is None of My Business
(Preview)
I think that's one of canadianguy's famous sayings, which I very much like and subscribe to now btw. But here's the latest song that says it perfectly. The lyrics are appropos and the music and beat is very upbeat and uptempo and makes me sing out loud and happy too. Hope you enjoy What Do Ya Think About T...
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Maria123
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0
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740
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This evening I am angry
(Preview)
Partner has not had a drink in several months. All that means is that the next three-day "gentleman's vacation" is closer to happening. We never discuss his alcoholism. He totally disregards it as if it does not exist. No need for me to attempt to tell him how I feel about anything. He ch...
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Diva
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12
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678
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Laugh, I suppose...
(Preview)
Boy, 6, tries to drive to Applebees Wed Oct 10, 4:48 AM ET BROOMFIELD, Colo. - A 6-year-old boy was hungry and decided he'd go to Applebees. So he grabbed the car keys, took his booster seat from the back seat of his grandmother's car and placed it in the driver's seat, then made a go of driving himself to th...
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Tiger2006
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3
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415
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misfit , mayham and miscarriage
(Preview)
this last week has been one of mayham. i bought a bed for a reduced price, believing the seller, when, i was told i was recieving a GREAT deal for a foam filled bed. GUARANTEED. i got the bed home and the foam filled bed turned out to be springs. bad backs run in my family. i have taken good care of mine, and, wo...
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beaulahg
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7
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576
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One of our hen's is having a birthday!!!!
(Preview)
(((((((((((((Belle1)))))))))))))) Happy Birthday Hen!!!! Sorry its so late but I just got home from work. Hope you had a great day!! Many happy returns. Love ya Hen Shad
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shadow1
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5
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371
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Frequently Asked Questions
(Preview)
Hello (((everyone))) This a compilation of frequently asked questions, that we are trying to get together for permant posting on this site. I have compiled this list from the post we have had up on the board for the last month and from discussions with members. Please review these. If you have any sugg...
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david62
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14
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939
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mess mess and more mess
(Preview)
The A went to court today and it will be a while till I learn what happened. Meantime he has left the place where he was living with a padklock on the door. Needless to say the people there are none too happy about that. I am doing my best not to be roped in. I have put in a request for my bicycle which I am sure he h...
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maresie2
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5
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540
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Checking in from Alaska
(Preview)
Hi Peeps! I made it to Alaska after an all day trip in airports and jets. I really dislike getting here but I guess I could look at the alternative...driving..lol I always get a window seat so I can have something to look at. This time I went thru Utah to hitch the ride to Anchorage. Man! Was it ever pretty...
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Christy
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14
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782
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Do you have a quiet spot, away from the chaos?
(Preview)
As the days shorten and less hours are spent outside, we all need that special place, a quiet place, where we can unwind, relax, and just focus on OUR needs only. Dealing with the disease of alcoholism can drain of us energy, self worth, self esteem etc.....Keeping the focus on ourselves can be a daunt...
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gardengal
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4
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383
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It Never Fails!!!
(Preview)
Hi There Everyone!! It's been a LONNNNGGGGG time since I've popped in to write anything...but I have been here reading and checking out alot of the posts. I decided to stop in and write because it's been a whole nine months now that I've been away from my "AH" and just when I think he's not goi...
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afmom03
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3
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386
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Help
(Preview)
I just told my AH that I would be attending another alanon meeting tomorrow night and my mom would be coming over to babysit since he had a practice with his band. He was visibly upset. Ten minutes later he came into the living room and spouted angrily "Do you plan to do this every Tuesday night?&q...
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KimG143
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19
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594
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On Vacation!!!
(Preview)
I'm having a great time in Orlando! We have been to Universal studios today and I am EXHAUSTED!!! We were only there 5 hours but it seems like 24! It was HOT and humid but fun just so much walking and go, go, go. I met a man in the pool earlier from England and he was very nice, always great to meet people fr...
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carolinagirl
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6
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423
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On vacation!
(Preview)
(((((((((((Family))))))))))), After a very long and hard week of work: I AM ON VACATION! I am so excited. Can you tell? Now we're not going to any place exotic, but does that matter? I'm just grateful that I have a job that allows me 3 weeks of vacation a year. We have some long standing traditions f...
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Karilynn
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5
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394
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Blessing of the hawk...
(Preview)
(((((((Everyone))))))) I am feeling so full of HP grace today. Over the years I had become so accustomed to hating the weekends... Isn't that basackwards... I hear people at work say .... boy, thank God it's friday. I smile and say 'Yeah'... But I just couldn't wait for it to be over. At work I didn...
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rtexas
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5
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647
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Its a sad day
(Preview)
Well as some of you may know, I asked my A to leave and told him i was filing for divorce. I thought he would go when i told him about filing but he hasn't. He has stuck around and been drunk ever since. Then worst part of it all is that tomorrow (Sat) is/would be our 17 wedding anny and i just can't get out of my h...
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shadow1
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7
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666
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just wanted you to know
(Preview)
Just wanted you all to know that 10/20 I will be having a family session with my parents and my councelor. I expect it to be emotional and challenging, as things with my parents often are. As I prepare myself, I know that I am going to be okay no matter what. But I am still somewhat anxious. Like I said, j...
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Tiger2006
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4
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447
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72 hellacious hours
(Preview)
I have been through 72 hours of hell. The phone has been ringing for three days with useless "conversations" with my son...the probable A. I say probable because it is so hard to determine. But after studying the posts on this site for over a year, sharing in some f to f meetings, I know I am del...
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omajoy
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5
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552
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The pendulum swings the other way(crazy rant)
(Preview)
I have spent my entire life being over responsible. Especially for the A but for everyone in my life. I saw this and vowed to change this behavior because I didn't want my kids to do this too. I have since spent all my time trying my hardest to be healthy and balanced. In doing so, I very rarely let the pendul...
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serendipity
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8
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595
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The Wheelchair is Gone!
(Preview)
(((((((((Family)))))))))), Just wanted to share some exciting news with you all. We sent back hubby's wheelchair this week! We have had this thing since April 30 and have made good use of it. But he hasn't used in since starting his physical therapy and it was time to go. He is still in his walker ca...
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Karilynn
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5
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593
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Supporting versus Accepting
(Preview)
I've been struggling with this concept for awhile now. I want to be there to support my mom through life but I don't want that to mean that I accept her behavior. Is there a way that I can support her through her tough times of being Bi-Polar and having chronic health issues without accepting her behavior...
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loper410
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2
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438
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I'm new and am looking for advice.
(Preview)
Wow, I really don't even know where to begin. So many things are running around in my head. I'm a senior at college and have recently come to terms with the fact that my mom is addicted to pain medications. She has chronic health issues that she needs pain meds for so she never has any problems getting them...
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loper410
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6
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576
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easy does it
(Preview)
One giant step for helpers and fixers and controlling people is to slow way down with the easy does it slogan. Even after hitting the al anon books, meetings and message boards hard and fast, then slowing down to easy does it with just some daily reading and meetings it is still too fast. Then trying t...
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ddub
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6
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403
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