Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

sparkette · sparkette

Tonights meeting had this as a topic. I was sitting down reading some Robert Frost tonight and came upon this poem that reminded me how easy it can be to keep things simple :O) You can always just rebalance the load :O) Love you all...enjoy! "The Armful" For every parcel I stoop down to seize I lose...

angeleyes8462 · angeleyes8462

I have read alot of the stuff on the board the last couple of days. I took sometime away from it all for me. Took time off work to figure out what makes me Smile inside and out and wasn't feeling all that great. Happiness for me is being me being happy, perky, humble when wrong,&n...

luv123 · luv123

HUMOR IN RECOVERY When I take a look at the disease of alcoholism from the distance of years of detachment that my recovery has put between us, I can often have a good chuckle for myself. What a gift that is considering all the pain and suffering I once felt. When I see how someone goes from one alcoh...

kspear · kspear

Hello all, I love this program for so many reasons, today because I can come and share something difficult and know that somewhere in the rooms, someone has gone through something similar and can share ESH on it. My mom just emailed me the news from her doctor. About 1 year ago (almost to the d...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

My A has had some major outbursts and rages the last two days and of course he blames me for his reactions and actions. Says if I didn't say that this way, or make a comment like this that way he wouldn't get so furious with me. Wednesday, I asked him to take the kids to school and I would fill his...

kspear · kspear

Thank you to everyone, I so appreciate all the prayers and sympathies and ESH with regards to my mother. I truly feel wrapped in the love of this program! Karen

debilyn · debilyn

Someone brought up to me something that made me want to share this. I have been here a very long time at mip. Along with growing in alanon I am growing in my spiritual life. You guys know I am not perfect. I am doing my best to be the best person I know how to be. I make mistakes. I hope you know that...

Juster · Juster

As I have said in prior posts, my problems do not seem very significant in consideration of what some of you go through. My AW and I are very close, probably very codependent, and together all of the time except during work. We commute together so I don't have to worry about her driving, I ca...

Gailey · Gailey

and his charges were dropped. I don't know if that is a good thing or not but I prayed that the outcome is God's will so I have to believe it is a good thing. Thanks everyone! Now I can go on with my plans and feel ok for today.

Barbara · Barbara

His restraining order is lifted. He's back to visiting my mother. She's back to enabling. My brother's mad at me for calling the cops when he violated his restraining order. Im ready to detach from the family. I want off the roller coaster.

Gailey · Gailey

In about 1 hour my son is going to court for a dui. He is very scared and I think that is a good thing. Last night he was full of anxiety because of all the footwork he was suppose to do in preparation for this hearing and did not do. Why??? Because he is an A and could only drink away his problems up until last nig...

Unsure · Unsure

I wanted to take the time to thank the board for allowing me to be me, for never judging the things that I did before Alanon, the things that I did to have acceptance, to be with someone, the low self-esteem that had me by the throat for years. But then I realized that someone could either like me for w...

serendipity · serendipity

last night i heard thru the grapevine that my ah went into rehab. but he still owes the rehab thousands from the last time....and they do not except dual diagnoses. which he is. my father is in the end stages of cancer. down to days i think. i am trying to be there for my dad as i am an only child. it's just me. s...

tkr · tkr

I have been searching for answers and sort of found it. brief history, married 16 yrs, together 24 yrs, no children, husband began cocaine use in 04, found out and he stopped in 5-31-05. no cocaine since, now occasionaly drinks, he moved out 12 days ago. had affair during dr...

Christy · Christy

Comes the Dawn After a while you learn the subtle difference Between holding a hand and chaining a soul, And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning And company doesn't mean security. And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts And presents aren't promi...

Jay · Jay

Hi everyone, I joined Al-Anon about two months ago and have been going to weekly meetings. I'm feeling much better but I'm a bit stuck in terms of how to clean up a mess I got myself into. Here's the short version of my story. My relationship with my sister is what drove me into the program. Fo...

drucilla06 · drucilla06

I remember trying to get involved with Alanon years ago, when my AH first got sober.I went to those meetings because I was told I had to or he would get better and I would stay sick.I wanted the marriage to work out so I went. I hated it.I sat there and listened to women tell horror stories of their lives wi...

sunny123 · sunny123

Hi Everyone, I just wanted to thank those who prayed for me to get through my finals in the midst of a crisis with my A. With the help and support I made it! I am currently staying with a dear friend. My therapist suggested that I leave our apartment ASAP. My A husband is requesting the separation a...

rtexas · rtexas

((((Everyone)))) Maybe it is because everything I am doing right now is "new" to me, but I am feeling between a rock and hard place right now. It is the end of the school year and it looks like there is a possiblity my AW's possition may be eliminated, ok, well they may find something else for her as the...

canadianguy · canadianguy

We quite often read posts on hear referring to either really good OR really bad experiences that people have had at f2f Al-Anon meetings they have tried. Some feel immediately welcomed and loved - others feel shunned and judged. I'd like to offer my own personal experience, and then a...

jennneeefffurrr · jennneeefffurrr

I took some time to write down all my feelings about my A. I wrote him a letter, that I never intended to give him. I realized I do not need this BS existence. He stayed somewhere, God only knows where, with his friend ( I know this because the friends car is in his driveway ) and did well, I can guess tha...

Barbara · Barbara

coffee coffee and more coffee? Had a very hard time sleeping last night - besides my brother going for his pretrial today my boss is throwing even more changes my way. Some Im accepting easier than others. Some Im trying to adapt/rationalize/etc. Some Im trying to anticipate so they are less stressfu...

sarahlm · sarahlm

Hi, I am new and very confused. I used to go to Alanon and still talk to my sponsor periodically but I have decided I want to get better now and go to meetings again and do everything I can to stay connected. My A husband is in jail on multiple DUIs until at least September, probaby longer. My friend reminded...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

this daily was for when we were still escaping through alcohol........this is the gist of what was shared When I was drinking, I always tried to build myself up. I used to "bs" people about myself. I told them so often i began to believe my own crap..... I used to hang around the lowbrow barr...

hmrnrnmm · hmrnrnmm

since joining alanon I have tried to let my Hp take over, I finally let her face her own consequences & I think it finally worked. Last weekend was really rough but......My A has been sober 6 days now. I am hopeful.

Today is my 46th birthday and she is sober for the first time since I can't reme...

sas · sas

I was reading another post which started me thinking about something. I have some "issues" with my father-in-law. He lived with us for 7 months last year and is back again for another month. I have never really liked him much, but I love the man because he is family. He pick...

hudsond · hudsond

Went to church Sunday--preacher talked about letting stuff go, not carrying around our "baggage"--our perceived or even real hurts and disappointments, our troubles. He said that we should let it go, all that stuff just drags us down and makes it pretty impossible to really live life. ...

Faith73 · Faith73

Yesterday evening I stood in front of 20 people in my class and gave a presentation on Helen Keller. My biggest fear is public speaking.I do it anyway. I signed up to go first, so I wouldn't spend time feeling anxious while listening to others. I'm not sure if that was a wise decision. As I started to read m...

Jeannie · Jeannie

Hi everyone, I've been reading, but have not had a chance to post in a while. This time of year is so busy. My eight year old is recieving his Communion on Saturday, my 19 year old is playing for the State Junior College tennis title on Saturday, and my 15 year old is playing in a softball t...

Barbara · Barbara

I havent done much reading on the slogans but lately when different situations arise Ive been finding myself thinking "How important is it?", "Let Go Let God", etc. What slogans help you the most?

Gailey · Gailey

I am in a place that I never, ever thought I could be in. Just less than a year ago I thought the rest of my life would be doom and gloom if the A did not get into recovery. Several months later I realize that I am not in that terrible place and the A is still active. It really seems like a miracle to me. I am living a...

Christy · Christy

At my f2f one of my fellow Alanoners was spending her 42nd Wedding Anniversary with us at the meeting. She said although she was saddened, she knows she was right where she needed to be to get through it and was very grateful to be able to go to a meeting and be amongst a family that understood her...

tootired · tootired

Last week I wrote that he threaten me with the gun. Well he call this morning, with the What's the big deal in him voice, of course, I hung up on him. My life is calm, I am staying busy, I am working on my courage to change. I will not get over it this time, like I have done some manytimes before. My reading t...

Diva · Diva

So many here seem to jump at the chance to say, "We don't give advice here." You can speak for yourselves on that one, but consider this: When and if you attempt to assign hidden meanings to statements made by other members, you are stepping way beyond the bounds of propriety. Better you should say, "We d...

Jennifer · Jennifer

That i could respect my AH more if he were a better liar. Since I seem to find out them all .... then I thought of what if I don't find them all .... then came how would I feel if there was much more? And I just cried and cried. If my brain is going to want to greive like this every time I see a li...

angeleyes8462 · angeleyes8462

Hi everyone, I am going to my first Alanon meeting tonight. Lately I have been seeing a lot of negativity as I am trying to keep a uplifted spirit about me. In my recovery. Last night between my first and second job I received a phone call. My A letting me know he was drinking a...

rozrn2 · rozrn2

Hello to this group, My name is Roz (no pseudonyms needed or wanted). It's nearly midnight here and I have been trying to go to sleep for hours as I am really really tired. I just talked to my long-distance boyfriend, D, and some more things came to light and I am angry and extremely...

Atera · Atera

I went to my f2f group meeting last night, and while I was there, I was so comforted, and felt such love and kinship with everyone there. I went home feeling good about what I am doing with the program. Later that night, however; I started second guessing myself and worrying about things I h...

Barbara · Barbara

so you can live a happier life? In 2002 less than 22hrs before we were to leave for a cruise it was cancelled due to Norwalk. It took me a long long time to "get over it". (We did get onboard the ship a year later). Ive been living the life of a martyr ever since - just changed my cause thats all. How do I get ove...

Barbara · Barbara

She said the restraining order against Douglas has been lifted! Actually when I was speaking to her he showed up at her condo so we ended the conversation. He spent last Wed-Mon in jail (again). His bail was $2400 which my mother happened to take to court with her Mon morn. Tomorrow he goes to di...

nicolefrancis · nicolefrancis

This is my first post on here, and im not exactly sure how to do it, so here it goes... I have been with my A for 3 and 1/2 years. It seems like we have been through everything. On our one year anniversary he was court ordered to treatment so i've been with him for about 1 1/2 years in his sobriety. I recentl...

jennneeefffurrr · jennneeefffurrr

I dont know what to do or how to react. I have not seen my A in 2 days, he has been out of state for work, he got back in town late last night. He called me just a little bit ago, I told him I got off work in 2 1/2 hours, thought he would be excited, instead he told me he needs to get out of his apartment for a while, sa...

sas · sas

Hi All, Question.......How do you all handle being the subject of conversation when you are never part of the conversation??? This just sounds childish, but I am soooo triggered by my father-in-law (who lives with us, but only for the next month). I could easily give you his invent...

maresie · maresie

And right now some of my critical plans include what to do for Christmas because Christmas is incredibly hard for me. I will not be spending Christmas 2006 with the A. I am through being abandoned. Maresie.

Barbara · Barbara

his answer "Why would I?" why do I go looking to get hurt?

Janoah · Janoah

I’m grateful that Al-Anon is a gentle program and that it provides suggestions rather than demands. Most of us have been way to hard on ourselves already. I ran across the following information in an Al-Anon conference approved literature and thought I would share it with you all. Take what you like a...

brakkenk · brakkenk

Hello all! I believe my last post was in October. I had just about given up on a lot of things. I decided instead of talking I would just read, read, read the posts and the conversations at the meetings. Well somehow, someway, something made me sit down and ask the question "is...

rtexas · rtexas

Have a great day! The One You Feed

bluestorm · bluestorm

hi. i appreciate anyone taking the time to read this. i need some help with how to respond to my BF. we've been together almost a year, and when we started dating he told me he was a recovered heroin addict. at the time he was about 9 mo. sober from heroin but drinking a lot and smoking a lot of pot. a l...

rtexas · rtexas

(((Everyone))) Had a session with a family therapist today. I don't know what happened, it was like I was possessed. As she asked me questions I rationalized everything. I made excusses for everyone that ever did anything or said anything sideways to me. By near the end she l...

angeleyes8462 · angeleyes8462

WOW, been a long time since I have felt that kind of kindness. I really was blown away. First thing that I have to do is get the right books. Thought I had the right ones but just found out I didn't. I got the "Newcomer Packet" so have to read threw it later. Found out about sponcership. Going to have to go a l...

nikkilou · nikkilou

Hi to all, I feel a little strange asking for prayers but i could really use some. My husband had a stroke seven years ago. He became disable and that lead to a drinking problem. Six years of hell for me. He is sober now and things are going better. We set up an appt with a...

debilyn · debilyn

My daughter and I had a wonderful time together. We took the baby on a supervised visit with her A ex. The baby is so cool. He will get redder and redder and let out a scream then calm calm and is ok again. I love how he will get a big smile then all of a sudden he looks so sad. God I love them both so much. I am so pr...

jennneeefffurrr · jennneeefffurrr

Tomorrow I am attending my 2nd face to face Al Anon meeting. I have read several posts here, and I am wondering am I supposed to ask for a support person there, like someone to call if I need help? This was not offered in the first meeting I went to, there were only 5 other people there for starters, and t...

Hopefloats · Hopefloats

Looking for your thoughts.... on why some find apologizing a reflection of weakness on their parts? Do we not all have weak moments? Are we a lesser human being in admitting maybe we have weaknesses as well as strengthes. I've yet to meet a perfect person, only my HP can claim perfection, we are human...

angeleyes8462 · angeleyes8462

I found this poem on a website thought it was uplifting. It's Up to You One song can spark a moment One flower can wake the dream. ...

cdb · cdb

I am not sure what happened to my A daughter after her miscarriage but she changed. It doesn't appear to be for the best either. She has been taking high risks again and avoiding important bank and other responsibilities. She was going to be living in a camper for the summer while her felon boyfriend wor...

Barbara · Barbara

can anyone identify? are you starting to realize your hard core is changing to a hard shell with a soft mushy core?

Barbara · Barbara

Just got the written results from my bloodwork a few weeks ago. My cholesterol has never been this good! woohoo April 06 - total 159, HDL 51 - I must be doing something right! June 05 - total 180, HDL 54, Sept 03 - total 166, HDL 44, May 03 - total 191, HDL 42 My brother had a heart attack results in bypas...

jrtjosey · jrtjosey

I woke up this morning with the word "Harmony" on my mind. It applies to so much of what we all are trying to accomplish in Al-Anon. Harmony in marriage, friendship, family, groups. So I pulled out my trusty "Pathways to Recovery" to Tradition One (Our Common welfare should come first,...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Keep it simple (Preview) Tonights meeting had this as a topic. I was sitting down reading some Robert Frost tonight and came upon this poem that reminded me how easy it can be to keep things simple :O) You can always just rebalance the load :O) Love you all...enjoy! "The Armful" For every parcel I stoop down to seize I lose...	sparkette	6	505	May 5, 2006 by peewee
	Trying to look at today not torrow (Preview) I have read alot of the stuff on the board the last couple of days. I took sometime away from it all for me. Took time off work to figure out what makes me Smile inside and out and wasn't feeling all that great. Happiness for me is being me being happy, perky, humble when wrong,&n...	angeleyes8462	1	538	May 5, 2006 by mebjk
	humor from distancing (Preview) HUMOR IN RECOVERY When I take a look at the disease of alcoholism from the distance of years of detachment that my recovery has put between us, I can often have a good chuckle for myself. What a gift that is considering all the pain and suffering I once felt. When I see how someone goes from one alcoh...	luv123	1	436	May 5, 2006 by Faith73
	Sad News (Preview) Hello all, I love this program for so many reasons, today because I can come and share something difficult and know that somewhere in the rooms, someone has gone through something similar and can share ESH on it. My mom just emailed me the news from her doctor. About 1 year ago (almost to the d...	kspear	22	733	May 5, 2006 by Ria
	Feeling bummed out today (Preview) My A has had some major outbursts and rages the last two days and of course he blames me for his reactions and actions. Says if I didn't say that this way, or make a comment like this that way he wouldn't get so furious with me. Wednesday, I asked him to take the kids to school and I would fill his...	twinmom2	6	456	May 5, 2006 by Dolphin123
	Thank you, a response to sad news (Preview) Thank you to everyone, I so appreciate all the prayers and sympathies and ESH with regards to my mother. I truly feel wrapped in the love of this program! Karen	kspear	1	574	May 5, 2006 by Ria
	some of me to you (Preview) Someone brought up to me something that made me want to share this. I have been here a very long time at mip. Along with growing in alanon I am growing in my spiritual life. You guys know I am not perfect. I am doing my best to be the best person I know how to be. I make mistakes. I hope you know that...	debilyn	7	542	May 5, 2006 by DanaAngel
	A little ESH Please (Preview) As I have said in prior posts, my problems do not seem very significant in consideration of what some of you go through. My AW and I are very close, probably very codependent, and together all of the time except during work. We commute together so I don't have to worry about her driving, I ca...	Juster	7	516	May 5, 2006 by Juster
	his trial is over already (Preview) and his charges were dropped. I don't know if that is a good thing or not but I prayed that the outcome is God's will so I have to believe it is a good thing. Thanks everyone! Now I can go on with my plans and feel ok for today.	Gailey	1	400	May 5, 2006 by Dolphin123
	brother made it through his pretrial, trial sent for end of July (Preview) His restraining order is lifted. He's back to visiting my mother. She's back to enabling. My brother's mad at me for calling the cops when he violated his restraining order. Im ready to detach from the family. I want off the roller coaster.	Barbara	4	446	May 5, 2006 by Jeannie
	feeling a little scared this morning (Preview) In about 1 hour my son is going to court for a dui. He is very scared and I think that is a good thing. Last night he was full of anxiety because of all the footwork he was suppose to do in preparation for this hearing and did not do. Why??? Because he is an A and could only drink away his problems up until last nig...	Gailey	2	470	May 5, 2006 by Dolphin123
	What To Do (Preview) I wanted to take the time to thank the board for allowing me to be me, for never judging the things that I did before Alanon, the things that I did to have acceptance, to be with someone, the low self-esteem that had me by the throat for years. But then I realized that someone could either like me for w...	Unsure	5	584	May 5, 2006 by Faith73
	rehab: take 2 (Preview) last night i heard thru the grapevine that my ah went into rehab. but he still owes the rehab thousands from the last time....and they do not except dual diagnoses. which he is. my father is in the end stages of cancer. down to days i think. i am trying to be there for my dad as i am an only child. it's just me. s...	serendipity	3	401	May 5, 2006 by debilyn
	new and confused. (Preview) I have been searching for answers and sort of found it. brief history, married 16 yrs, together 24 yrs, no children, husband began cocaine use in 04, found out and he stopped in 5-31-05. no cocaine since, now occasionaly drinks, he moved out 12 days ago. had affair during dr...	tkr	5	468	May 5, 2006 by debilyn
	ComesThe Dawn (Preview) Comes the Dawn After a while you learn the subtle difference Between holding a hand and chaining a soul, And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning And company doesn't mean security. And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts And presents aren't promi...	Christy	6	459	May 5, 2006 by aunitedway
	New to AlAnon, not sure what to do (Preview) Hi everyone, I joined Al-Anon about two months ago and have been going to weekly meetings. I'm feeling much better but I'm a bit stuck in terms of how to clean up a mess I got myself into. Here's the short version of my story. My relationship with my sister is what drove me into the program. Fo...	Jay	10	585	May 5, 2006 by aunitedway
	Couldn't do it without Alanon..... (Preview) I remember trying to get involved with Alanon years ago, when my AH first got sober.I went to those meetings because I was told I had to or he would get better and I would stay sick.I wanted the marriage to work out so I went. I hated it.I sat there and listened to women tell horror stories of their lives wi...	drucilla06	3	441	May 5, 2006 by debilyn
	update (Preview) Hi Everyone, I just wanted to thank those who prayed for me to get through my finals in the midst of a crisis with my A. With the help and support I made it! I am currently staying with a dear friend. My therapist suggested that I leave our apartment ASAP. My A husband is requesting the separation a...	sunny123	3	394	May 5, 2006 by debilyn
	Projecting or Proactive (Preview) ((((Everyone)))) Maybe it is because everything I am doing right now is "new" to me, but I am feeling between a rock and hard place right now. It is the end of the school year and it looks like there is a possiblity my AW's possition may be eliminated, ok, well they may find something else for her as the...	rtexas	7	500	May 5, 2006 by jrtjosey
	Support of f2f meetings... (Preview) We quite often read posts on hear referring to either really good OR really bad experiences that people have had at f2f Al-Anon meetings they have tried. Some feel immediately welcomed and loved - others feel shunned and judged. I'd like to offer my own personal experience, and then a...	canadianguy	7	623	May 5, 2006 by jrtjosey
	Calling It QUITS with my A (Preview) I took some time to write down all my feelings about my A. I wrote him a letter, that I never intended to give him. I realized I do not need this BS existence. He stayed somewhere, God only knows where, with his friend ( I know this because the friends car is in his driveway ) and did well, I can guess tha...	jennneeefffurrr	10	789	May 4, 2006 by isabela40
	how do you function after those sleepless nights? (Preview) coffee coffee and more coffee? Had a very hard time sleeping last night - besides my brother going for his pretrial today my boss is throwing even more changes my way. Some Im accepting easier than others. Some Im trying to adapt/rationalize/etc. Some Im trying to anticipate so they are less stressfu...	Barbara	4	406	May 4, 2006 by Maria123
	New to this board-husband in jail (Preview) Hi, I am new and very confused. I used to go to Alanon and still talk to my sponsor periodically but I have decided I want to get better now and go to meetings again and do everything I can to stay connected. My A husband is in jail on multiple DUIs until at least September, probaby longer. My friend reminded...	sarahlm	5	461	May 4, 2006 by abbyal
	what a diference the program can make (Preview) this daily was for when we were still escaping through alcohol........this is the gist of what was shared When I was drinking, I always tried to build myself up. I used to "bs" people about myself. I told them so often i began to believe my own crap..... I used to hang around the lowbrow barr...	rosie light shines	3	380	May 4, 2006 by sunny123
	bestest birthday ever today may 4th (Preview) since joining alanon I have tried to let my Hp take over, I finally let her face her own consequences & I think it finally worked. Last weekend was really rough but......My A has been sober 6 days now. I am hopeful. Today is my 46th birthday and she is sober for the first time since I can't reme...	hmrnrnmm	8	535	May 4, 2006 by Jennifer
	My Part In It (Preview) I was reading another post which started me thinking about something. I have some "issues" with my father-in-law. He lived with us for 7 months last year and is back again for another month. I have never really liked him much, but I love the man because he is family. He pick...	sas	2	595	May 4, 2006 by rosie light shines
	Letting Go (Preview) Went to church Sunday--preacher talked about letting stuff go, not carrying around our "baggage"--our perceived or even real hurts and disappointments, our troubles. He said that we should let it go, all that stuff just drags us down and makes it pretty impossible to really live life. ...	hudsond	4	437	May 4, 2006 by rosie light shines
	Walking thru the fear (Preview) Yesterday evening I stood in front of 20 people in my class and gave a presentation on Helen Keller. My biggest fear is public speaking.I do it anyway. I signed up to go first, so I wouldn't spend time feeling anxious while listening to others. I'm not sure if that was a wise decision. As I started to read m...	Faith73	13	703	May 4, 2006 by Faith73
	Update (Preview) Hi everyone, I've been reading, but have not had a chance to post in a while. This time of year is so busy. My eight year old is recieving his Communion on Saturday, my 19 year old is playing for the State Junior College tennis title on Saturday, and my 15 year old is playing in a softball t...	Jeannie	8	618	May 4, 2006 by debilyn
	What slogans do You use the most? (Preview) I havent done much reading on the slogans but lately when different situations arise Ive been finding myself thinking "How important is it?", "Let Go Let God", etc. What slogans help you the most?	Barbara	9	870	May 4, 2006 by Dolphin123
	"old me"..........."new me" (Preview) I am in a place that I never, ever thought I could be in. Just less than a year ago I thought the rest of my life would be doom and gloom if the A did not get into recovery. Several months later I realize that I am not in that terrible place and the A is still active. It really seems like a miracle to me. I am living a...	Gailey	3	842	May 4, 2006 by david62
	A great, true Alanon story.. :) (Preview) At my f2f one of my fellow Alanoners was spending her 42nd Wedding Anniversary with us at the meeting. She said although she was saddened, she knows she was right where she needed to be to get through it and was very grateful to be able to go to a meeting and be amongst a family that understood her...	Christy	6	467	May 4, 2006 by Jeannie
	What's the big Deal!!! (Preview) Last week I wrote that he threaten me with the gun. Well he call this morning, with the What's the big deal in him voice, of course, I hung up on him. My life is calm, I am staying busy, I am working on my courage to change. I will not get over it this time, like I have done some manytimes before. My reading t...	tootired	4	452	May 4, 2006 by aunitedway
	A little something that bothers me. (Preview) So many here seem to jump at the chance to say, "We don't give advice here." You can speak for yourselves on that one, but consider this: When and if you attempt to assign hidden meanings to statements made by other members, you are stepping way beyond the bounds of propriety. Better you should say, "We d...	Diva	11	621	May 4, 2006 by Diva
	I had this weird thought (Preview) That i could respect my AH more if he were a better liar. Since I seem to find out them all .... then I thought of what if I don't find them all .... then came how would I feel if there was much more? And I just cried and cried. If my brain is going to want to greive like this every time I see a li...	Jennifer	7	686	May 4, 2006 by kathykelly
	What is going on in my world (Preview) Hi everyone, I am going to my first Alanon meeting tonight. Lately I have been seeing a lot of negativity as I am trying to keep a uplifted spirit about me. In my recovery. Last night between my first and second job I received a phone call. My A letting me know he was drinking a...	angeleyes8462	2	448	May 4, 2006 by roygbiv
	Serious Help Needed Fast (Preview) Hello to this group, My name is Roz (no pseudonyms needed or wanted). It's nearly midnight here and I have been trying to go to sleep for hours as I am really really tired. I just talked to my long-distance boyfriend, D, and some more things came to light and I am angry and extremely...	rozrn2	11	501	May 4, 2006 by roygbiv
	what does this mean? (Preview) I went to my f2f group meeting last night, and while I was there, I was so comforted, and felt such love and kinship with everyone there. I went home feeling good about what I am doing with the program. Later that night, however; I started second guessing myself and worrying about things I h...	Atera	8	608	May 4, 2006 by roygbiv
	how do you let go of the self-pity? (Preview) so you can live a happier life? In 2002 less than 22hrs before we were to leave for a cruise it was cancelled due to Norwalk. It took me a long long time to "get over it". (We did get onboard the ship a year later). Ive been living the life of a martyr ever since - just changed my cause thats all. How do I get ove...	Barbara	7	843	May 4, 2006 by roygbiv
	just spoke with my mother (Preview) She said the restraining order against Douglas has been lifted! Actually when I was speaking to her he showed up at her condo so we ended the conversation. He spent last Wed-Mon in jail (again). His bail was $2400 which my mother happened to take to court with her Mon morn. Tomorrow he goes to di...	Barbara	3	407	May 4, 2006 by roygbiv
	confused, overwhelmed (Preview) This is my first post on here, and im not exactly sure how to do it, so here it goes... I have been with my A for 3 and 1/2 years. It seems like we have been through everything. On our one year anniversary he was court ordered to treatment so i've been with him for about 1 1/2 years in his sobriety. I recentl...	nicolefrancis	4	542	May 4, 2006 by Jerry F
	Need HELP & ADVICE NOW!!! (Preview) I dont know what to do or how to react. I have not seen my A in 2 days, he has been out of state for work, he got back in town late last night. He called me just a little bit ago, I told him I got off work in 2 1/2 hours, thought he would be excited, instead he told me he needs to get out of his apartment for a while, sa...	jennneeefffurrr	10	831	May 4, 2006 by roygbiv
	dealing with father-in-law (Preview) Hi All, Question.......How do you all handle being the subject of conversation when you are never part of the conversation??? This just sounds childish, but I am soooo triggered by my father-in-law (who lives with us, but only for the next month). I could easily give you his invent...	sas	5	585	May 4, 2006 by abbyal
	my birthday (Preview) And right now some of my critical plans include what to do for Christmas because Christmas is incredibly hard for me. I will not be spending Christmas 2006 with the A. I am through being abandoned. Maresie.	maresie	3	519	May 3, 2006 by jrtjosey
	so i come home from work and ask A husband "Did you miss me?" (Preview) his answer "Why would I?" why do I go looking to get hurt?	Barbara	9	648	May 3, 2006 by jrtjosey
	the gentle program (Preview) I’m grateful that Al-Anon is a gentle program and that it provides suggestions rather than demands. Most of us have been way to hard on ourselves already. I ran across the following information in an Al-Anon conference approved literature and thought I would share it with you all. Take what you like a...	Janoah	3	701	May 3, 2006 by tea2
	Miraculous changes (Preview) Hello all! I believe my last post was in October. I had just about given up on a lot of things. I decided instead of talking I would just read, read, read the posts and the conversations at the meetings. Well somehow, someway, something made me sit down and ask the question "is...	brakkenk	4	532	May 3, 2006 by Diva
	Oldie but a goodie... (Preview) Have a great day! The One You Feed	rtexas	5	436	May 3, 2006 by Diva
	New here- need relationship advice Please. (Preview) hi. i appreciate anyone taking the time to read this. i need some help with how to respond to my BF. we've been together almost a year, and when we started dating he told me he was a recovered heroin addict. at the time he was about 9 mo. sober from heroin but drinking a lot and smoking a lot of pot. a l...	bluestorm	4	511	May 3, 2006 by bluestorm
	...my problems pale in comparison ... (Preview) (((Everyone))) Had a session with a family therapist today. I don't know what happened, it was like I was possessed. As she asked me questions I rationalized everything. I made excusses for everyone that ever did anything or said anything sideways to me. By near the end she l...	rtexas	10	657	May 3, 2006 by Ria
	first f2f (Preview) WOW, been a long time since I have felt that kind of kindness. I really was blown away. First thing that I have to do is get the right books. Thought I had the right ones but just found out I didn't. I got the "Newcomer Packet" so have to read threw it later. Found out about sponcership. Going to have to go a l...	angeleyes8462	3	408	May 3, 2006 by jennneeefffurrr
	prayers (Preview) Hi to all, I feel a little strange asking for prayers but i could really use some. My husband had a stroke seven years ago. He became disable and that lead to a drinking problem. Six years of hell for me. He is sober now and things are going better. We set up an appt with a...	nikkilou	4	416	May 3, 2006 by Dolphin123
	Update and would appreciate thoughts (Preview) My daughter and I had a wonderful time together. We took the baby on a supervised visit with her A ex. The baby is so cool. He will get redder and redder and let out a scream then calm calm and is ok again. I love how he will get a big smile then all of a sudden he looks so sad. God I love them both so much. I am so pr...	debilyn	18	574	May 3, 2006 by TLC2
	2nd AlAnon meeting tomorrow for me (Preview) Tomorrow I am attending my 2nd face to face Al Anon meeting. I have read several posts here, and I am wondering am I supposed to ask for a support person there, like someone to call if I need help? This was not offered in the first meeting I went to, there were only 5 other people there for starters, and t...	jennneeefffurrr	7	596	May 3, 2006 by jennneeefffurrr
	Apologies (Preview) Looking for your thoughts.... on why some find apologizing a reflection of weakness on their parts? Do we not all have weak moments? Are we a lesser human being in admitting maybe we have weaknesses as well as strengthes. I've yet to meet a perfect person, only my HP can claim perfection, we are human...	Hopefloats	7	590	May 3, 2006 by Hopefloats
	Found this thought I would share (Preview) I found this poem on a website thought it was uplifting. *It's Up to You* *One song can spark a moment One flower can wake the dream. ...*	angeleyes8462	3	475	May 3, 2006 by Ria
	daughter struggling, parents not well :( (Preview) I am not sure what happened to my A daughter after her miscarriage but she changed. It doesn't appear to be for the best either. She has been taking high risks again and avoiding important bank and other responsibilities. She was going to be living in a camper for the summer while her felon boyfriend wor...	cdb	14	873	May 2, 2006 by cdb
	Hard core changing to hard shell/soft core ? (Preview) can anyone identify? are you starting to realize your hard core is changing to a hard shell with a soft mushy core?	Barbara	3	472	May 2, 2006 by abbyal
	taking care of myself physically (Preview) Just got the written results from my bloodwork a few weeks ago. My cholesterol has never been this good! woohoo April 06 - total 159, HDL 51 - I must be doing something right! June 05 - total 180, HDL 54, Sept 03 - total 166, HDL 44, May 03 - total 191, HDL 42 My brother had a heart attack results in bypas...	Barbara	2	402	May 2, 2006 by Maria123
	Harmony (Preview) I woke up this morning with the word "Harmony" on my mind. It applies to so much of what we all are trying to accomplish in Al-Anon. Harmony in marriage, friendship, family, groups. So I pulled out my trusty "Pathways to Recovery" to Tradition One (Our Common welfare should come first,...	jrtjosey	4	541	May 2, 2006 by mebjk
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.