|
|
learning to accept me
(Preview)
i heard this and did my take on it...........not taken from alanon........
it's easier to accept ourselves as sick people than as bad people. And the easier it is to accept ourselves, the easier it becomes to accept responsibility for ourselves.We achieve self-acceptance t...
|
rosie light shines
|
1
|
198
|
|
|
|
Codependant No More
(Preview)
I just stopped by the library yesterday and got the book Codependent No More. I have not started the AlAnon program as am having a hard time finding one close by but after reading half the book boy did I meet most of the criteria and various stages of codendency. But I had plenty of time getti...
|
MaNature26
|
5
|
420
|
|
|
|
My failure...my progress
(Preview)
I've been off and on the message board today, for the first time in months. I posted basically to say hi, and that I'm hanging in there. I've been really anxious that my A would call home and I would have the phone tied up, online...and I've been really concerned that I wouldn't get enough wo...
|
Belongtome
|
4
|
279
|
|
|
|
It's a great day....
(Preview)
Thank you for all the prayers concerning my son being over in the sandbox. His wife has been very ill as well as my mother having terminal cancer. The Air Force did send him home for 2 weeks to spend time with my mom. However his wife's illness is progressive and she has not been well.&...
|
marmare
|
2
|
266
|
|
|
|
First Face to Face Mgt
(Preview)
I went to my first face to face meeting tonight. It was great. I am really suprise at the courage that I am getting from the Alonon family. I am going to be ok, and most of all I am safe. thanks everyone
tootired
|
tootired
|
9
|
383
|
|
|
|
Memory Gaps
(Preview)
I've been coming up on gaps in my memory while working on my 4th step. The one I'm dealing with right now has to do with anger -- I don't ever recall anyone expressing anger, or the results of anger, of feeling angry as a kid...I know it was there I just feel like I can't recall it.
I also don't remember the y...
|
irena
|
5
|
342
|
|
|
|
don't want to rush into this
(Preview)
We're supposed to be separating soon, my A is planning on moving out memorial day weekend. I'm very confused and I'm not sure how I'm feeling about this. I knew it was coming and on some levels, I'm relieved, but I'm also scared. That's a whole different post though. What I ne...
|
cabma
|
3
|
516
|
|
|
|
a good moment
(Preview)
Things have been so up and down the past week I just wanted to share a good moment with my family...
I took the advice many of you gave me yesterday and did something good for myself. I went for a run...well it felt so good yesterday that I did it again tonight. I put on my headphones and headed out the door....
|
sparkette
|
9
|
346
|
|
|
|
Learning Patience and Strength
(Preview)
Hi everyone,
As I am new to this I have been struggling the last few days. I have been talking with one of the A's in my life. In the beginning I felt like I was to cut off all contact with him. So that is what I did. But then I started praying and praying and reading the bible, I started getting c...
|
angeleyes8462
|
4
|
312
|
|
|
|
Do I belong here?
(Preview)
I have been attending Al-anon meetings in my hometown for almost a year and a half, and am working the steps and reading literature etc. The effects of alcoholism in my life stem mostly from growing up with an alcoholic mom who was also an adult child, and a dad who, well, haven't figured that out yet. I ju...
|
irena
|
9
|
546
|
|
|
|
please explain
(Preview)
I need a little help understanding the "dry drunk" and the alcoholic behavior that is symptomatic of it. My AH did quit drinking once for 8 months. Now his defense is that I still wasn't happy with him during that time, so why bother quitting again? I think this may be the dry drunk in...
|
Atera
|
7
|
400
|
|
|
|
confused & feeling like I don't get it
(Preview)
I am so confused. I thought I posted a message but I do not see it. I saw it again last nite but now it is no where to be found. Today is Monday, I made it to my 5th f2f meeting today.
I asked her to go get gas in the truck while I fed the dogs. I have me an escape bag packed. In case...
|
hmrnrnmm
|
5
|
641
|
|
|
|
mother just admitted brother had her cornered again
(Preview)
Im starting to think I did the right thing getting him out of there on Sunday. My mother just called. During the conversation she admitted that he had her cornered again.
|
Barbara
|
3
|
290
|
|
|
|
A Dad doesnt come on vacation - when is it time to invite sons friend?
(Preview)
Our son will be 14 next month. Ive been taking him on vacations (week long & long wknds) w/out his Dad (my A husband) since son was 4yrs old. When is it time to step back and let son bring a friend? Im thinking of doing less attractions and letting son hang out w/a friend at the pools instead of always nee...
|
Barbara
|
5
|
229
|
|
|
|
Change is hard..on them
(Preview)
-- Edited by drucilla06 at 19:57, 2006-04-25
|
drucilla06
|
1
|
312
|
|
|
|
HP working
(Preview)
on friday i was all upset because my addict husband had moved in with his mother who is the classic enabler. i haven't spoken to them at all for the past 3 years- their decision- my husband chose me and his kids and sobriety over them and all of their insanity. but now he's out there and i'm don...
|
serendipity
|
2
|
265
|
|
|
|
Its Monday - Ive already been informed A husbands drinking buddy is spending Fri night at our house!
(Preview)
Husband will be picking up his drinking buddy on the way home from work Fri afternoon. They're going to a womans house who husband works with to move furniture. And then of course husband is using it as an excuse to not drive his drinking buddy back home! A husband informed me his drinking buddy will be sp...
|
Barbara
|
6
|
282
|
|
|
|
Codependents and our Drama...
(Preview)
I have realized that my Codependent behavior and one of my flaws in character was gravatating towards drama. My A will often say, you thrive on drama and craziness and I can't stand it!! I suppose he is right to some degree. What I have learned by working this program is that when the...
|
twinmom2
|
3
|
279
|
|
|
|
I feel like the same old crap is starting again
(Preview)
This weekend was a great weekend despite my "a's" aweful mood. The boys had a great time for their birthday and I ended up having a party even though I said I wasn't going to. We had out of town guests come in with their children. So all together I had 8 kids in my two bedroom condo!!&nbs...
|
twinmom2
|
8
|
311
|
|
|
|
ya all gotta gotta gotta come now
(Preview)
Hey all,
last year we had a good group of members from MIP come the "Serenity in Yosemite" conference here in Yosemite California. It is an awesome conference in an awesome place with an awesome group of people!!!!!
I had to write all and say that now ya all just gotta gotta come...
|
mastiff
|
2
|
373
|
|
|
|
this weekend--not so much!
(Preview)
I posted last Monday that last weekend was great--well this weekend not so much! He was pretty irritable and grouchy. I tried to ignore it, but sometimes it's just so depressing! I think I kindof know a little bit of what happened. I went back to band practice on Sat. (I sing w...
|
hudsond
|
4
|
316
|
|
|
|
Not an ultimatum
(Preview)
I know this is probabbly going to sound dumb, but I'm not sure, so I am asking for opinions.
I know that to give anyone an ultimatum is wrong. An ultimatum is saying if you do this, I wil do this or if you do not do this I will do this. It is something with a catch attached to it. An attempt to force someone to do...
|
Jeannie
|
12
|
371
|
|
|
|
"Let Go and Let God Get 'Em "
(Preview)
Just heard this for the first time this past weekend! From a group of recovering A's and Al-Anons at a potluck! Hadn't heard it before--so forgive me if you all know it well! I think it's priceless!
~Shelagh
|
seachange
|
3
|
385
|
|
|
|
This stuff works!
(Preview)
All,
As a newbie I began with many quesitons. The replys were often, "work the steps, come here often and know how much we love you" I was not sure what that meant until I actually started working step 1. It is starting to sink in. I came to MIP really pissed off and hurt. ...
|
Goldie
|
4
|
292
|
|
|
|
good weekend
(Preview)
just an update on the weekend. My A told me he was planning on going to a party for a friend of his on saturday. (these friends are all a's as well) instead of freaking out and asking him not to go... I just told him he was a grown man and he is able to make his own decisions. it was veryu hard...
|
msykesp
|
3
|
215
|
|
|
|
guess what??? better news
(Preview)
hey u guys, the salesman who handled the job, that i had "screwed up" told me in a very nice email "rosie what U did was fixed--- we were SECOND lowest bid---so if we dont' get the job, its over PRICE, not what U did".....
i was so relieved that i didn'...
|
rosie light shines
|
4
|
284
|
|
|
|
new and need help!
(Preview)
Hi. I am new to the board and would appreciate any advice you can give me. I have been married to my alcoholic husband for 7 years. Finally, I am reaching out to others in my situation because I feel so depressed and alone. I have done everything I know how to do to convince my husband to give up drinking. I ha...
|
robinr
|
8
|
435
|
|
|
|
Not sure how I feel...
(Preview)
I enjoyed the weekend (most of it anyway).
I was scheduled to work this weekend some so we didn't plan on anything big, but I was determined to get some fun out of it. LOL
Friday night, I had mentioned that going to a local park and racing the go-carts would be fun. A said she had plans. Tha...
|
rtexas
|
11
|
387
|
|
|
|
i just GOTTA release and live like today is all i got
(Preview)
oh man have i been "projecting" i mean it hasn't happened yet and iam projecting it.....like a movie, i am writing and reading the END b4 i even read the NOW part......this daily i read today, was meant for me to read...it talked about staying in the present....i sooo need to stay in the NOW.....T...
|
rosie light shines
|
1
|
232
|
|
|
|
DRY DRUNK?
(Preview)
Hi everyone,
Can someone help explain this "dry drunk" that I keep reading about? What does that exactly mean?
My A husband has been threatening separation and we must move in a month because our lease is up. So the pressure is dragging me down in the middle of final exams. His threat couldn't h...
|
sunny123
|
4
|
361
|
|
|
|
called cops yesterday because brother was violating restraining order
(Preview)
and now I feel like crap! geesch you know why cant they just leave me out of it? Im finally ready to disown my family.
I called my mother yesterday morn and my brother was there. He has a court ordered restraining order to not see/talk/communicate with anyone in the family. When I called he answered. I c...
|
Barbara
|
7
|
368
|
|
|
|
Somehow I can turn my life upside down!
(Preview)
Me and my fiance have been trying to buy this house and we have closing friday. BUT yesterday we ended up in a huge fight! He told me to call the whole thing off and that he is moving out.
Somewere deep down I expected to screw this up and push him away permanantly and it seems as if I have accomplishe...
|
jmath31
|
3
|
234
|
|
|
|
the "feeling"
(Preview)
does anyone ever get the feeling in their stomach when crisis hits? that rush,it makes me shake and feel sick. but still i think i might be addicted to it. my a husband moved in with his mother last week. i found out friday. i was so mad. i lost all my peace. but i asked him for money i knew he got paid friday. ju...
|
serendipity
|
7
|
313
|
|
|
|
i love but i love with CARE
(Preview)
i went to a hell of a meet last night and we talked about LOVE----being open to it and it brought these feelings/ thoughts/ esh to mind, and thought i would share.....
i think love is like watering a plant, however when i love now, i keep some of my heart in reserve.....like don't love...
|
rosie light shines
|
1
|
340
|
|
|
|
am I doing the right thing?
(Preview)
Hi, this is my first post. I need to get this off my chest but haven't the gumption to go to a live meeting. My mom is an A as is her boyfriend of 20 years. He also uses crack. Both my husband and I were raised by A single mothers on welfare. We have 2 children (10 & 12 yrs)....
|
Wendy
|
5
|
256
|
|
|
|
Letting go and letting my hp
(Preview)
I dont think I am ready for a relationship
I want out of it right now because I am scared. My boyfriend went to work (he is not an A, but my ex was and I am trying to move past him) and he SHOULD be home by now and he is not. I usually hear from him by now and I havent. I am freaked out beyond bel...
|
Cyn
|
6
|
260
|
|
|
|
The Good in an A
(Preview)
Hello everyone.
I don't post a lot, but I sure do spend a lot of time reading other posts. This forum is about all the support I have for my disease and I so appreciate it.
When I first came here, I thought, oh poor me and what I have to put up with. Now I feel that I have a much better perspecti...
|
Juster
|
8
|
364
|
|
|
|
Hi everybody
(Preview)
I'm finally back online....been travelling, or not in a private place in which to post. I've missed the message board tremendously. You all are a life line to me.
I'm doing pretty well...good days, and bad days. I went on an antidepressant in October, and it took awhile, but now...
|
Belongtome
|
1
|
216
|
|
|
|
Any Advice???
(Preview)
Dear Friends,
Was just sitting here thinking about life and how crazy it can be. Always tought life would be a struggle here and there, but wow everywhere I turn lately it's difficult.
Hub is finally out of the house, I know it is the best thing, just wish the love would go away. The pain and frust...
|
Andrea12
|
13
|
564
|
|
|
|
can I murder him?
(Preview)
My daughters baby's father is a young A. An abusive A. He pushed my daughter when she was holding the baby and hit her. He held his hand over her mouth.
She got away and ran to another apt. called police. He ran off. She got out of there, gave thirty days notice and her friend picked them up.
She is coming...
|
debilyn
|
15
|
509
|
|
|
|
Hello everyone!
(Preview)
I am new to the board, and just wanted to introduce myself. I went to my first Al-Anon meeting on Tuesday, and I could feel it starting to help. I still have a long way to go, and am having a LOT of trouble and sadness. I am hoping that coming here will help in between times I can go t...
|
Atera
|
5
|
252
|
|
|
|
Really hurting today
(Preview)
Good morning all.
I've noticed over the past few days that I've really been keeping myself held hostage by my insecurities. Today is just a little more intense. It's kind of normal for me around this time of year, I suppose, as my birthday approaches and I just have kind of a lot of...
|
kspear
|
7
|
296
|
|
|
|
Heart Cry
(Preview)
I used to dabble with poetry .... haven't written in a long while ... it was my outlet back then, a way to express all that I felt. Always meant to do something with my writing...but never have (despite encouragement from friends and teachers). I watch my daughter now doing as I did... pour...
|
kismetstrand
|
10
|
368
|
|
|
|
cdb, did you get unburied??? lol
(Preview)
Hey cdb,
Noticed you are posting again- I wondered how hard you got hit with that powerful spring storm that whipped thru your way about a week ago....
Good to see you here again-
Dana
|
DanaAngel
|
1
|
261
|
|
|
|
Update for anyone in chat last nite
(Preview)
since I suspect some of you might be a little codie (not taking your inventory, lol), I'm going to be codie and give you an update so you don't worry.
My 15 yo last nite had some old Adderall in her room which I was not aware of. Her and her friend decided to take some to see how it would feel.&n...
|
bobump
|
8
|
374
|
|
|
|
OK I Don't Get It!!!
(Preview)
So many of you have mentioned online dating, I can see using it as a screening tool like at Match.com, but this just dating someone you met in chat has me baffled. I don't get how you can fall in love with a computer generated person. It could b anyone's picture. We have enough issues i...
|
jrtjosey
|
9
|
466
|
|
|
|
MIP is awesome!
(Preview)
This is my first time using this message board, so bear w/me, please. I have only used the chat room. I have been in the Alanon program for several years. Two months ago, we found out that our son has cancer. Rhabdomyosarcoma. Very rare, especially for his age. ...
|
smpoli
|
8
|
414
|
|
|
|
A Visit from the Easter Beagle!
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, I hope your Easter is/was great!
I just wanted to share a little something that happened to me the other night that I cant quit chuckling about!
I went last Friday to Katy, Tx to visit my brother and his family for easter. I arrived there mid afternoon. Once before, about...
|
david62
|
7
|
407
|
|
|
|
What makes you happy?
(Preview)
Reading posts this morning on the joys of baseball, the wonder of seeing flowers at the side of the road that were never noticed before.... and it got me thinking of all the pleasures HP has put in my path also.
Flowers... ahh yes, our first spring here (last year) was a wonderful time. Dr...
|
kismetstrand
|
5
|
345
|
|
|
|
the tears are starting to come, maybe im start to heal
(Preview)
Worked some more last night on my 4th step. Was thinking about relationships. Thought about growing up, then my early 20s and then to my present. Its all connected. Before I realized it the tears were leaking out. Maybe Im starting to heal?
|
Barbara
|
4
|
241
|
|
|
|
spirituality and humor
(Preview)
Hello roomies,
Are spirituality and humor connected? Here's proof they are:
In Nigeria a man was stopped in a speed trap.
As he rolled down the window, he said to the policeman: "How could I be speeding, officer, I have the Holy Ghost , Maria and Jesus riding with me!"
"Hmm...
|
toto12
|
1
|
247
|
|
|
|
Awsome,I cried and understood as I watched
(Preview)
http://www.inspiringthots.net/   &nbs...
|
d53sjurne
|
5
|
342
|
|
|
|
Simple Gratitude
(Preview)
Ok ok, I need to gloat a bit, hehehe…
I am a fan of baseball. Some are sharing what they are grateful for well I must admit, yup baseball is way up there!
I live in a state that seems to have winters that last way too long. Hearing when the teams report for spring training is music to my ears –ahhh… That ser...
|
tea2
|
8
|
321
|
|
|
|
Im in the habit of negative projection
(Preview)
|
Barbara
|
4
|
356
|
|
|
|
oh what to do....
(Preview)
Hello everyone...
OK so the lastest in this drama that i call my life...
Last night hubby comes by after his meeting. He says to me... a couple of people are going bowling after the meeting do you want to go with? I hestitate and ask him what his motives are...He say he doesnt unde...
|
snt
|
4
|
277
|
|
|
|
affirmations( a gift)
(Preview)
Years ago my Sponcer Mary Lee gave me this affirmation,she died of Cancer,but her memories and leasons are in my heart and mind.This she gave me at one of the lowest points in my life.I had found out my daughter was malested.And working not only to help my daughter,I also needed help f...
|
angel123
|
4
|
323
|
|
|
|
Ending the week with a smile
(Preview)
Hello everyone....I survived my birthday...with the help of many of you.
It's funny how I thought I'd learned so much with the ending of my relationship with my ex...who is an A. I told myself what I would put up with and wouldn't. Now I find myself beginning a new relation...
|
katrina2000
|
3
|
223
|
|
|
|
why do I let WEATHER affect me so?
(Preview)
Nice day yesterday. Actually quite often its nice through the week and the weekend forecast is projected to be cold & wet. I work indoors M-F 930-5 and no I cant get out on my lunch break - I have a young teen to come home and check on. People come into the library and say "Oh you really should get outside...
|
Barbara
|
4
|
326
|
|
|
|
today
(Preview)
Today started out like so many do - me walking around the house - my husband not taking 2 seconds to look me in the face. I walk over to him to say good morning and give him a hug and he barely acknowledges me, half-heartedly hugs me back. He only chooses to engage in conversation with me lately it seems when t...
|
sparkette
|
5
|
347
|
|
|
|
Thank you...
(Preview)
Hi everyone,
Thank you all so much for your responses to my post below "trying not to worry." They made me cry and think a lot (especially about trying to control things), and indeed this is something I need to give over to HP. I went and said goodbye to the dog today, and she was put d...
|
nal
|
1
|
251
|
|