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Well today is 16 days of seperationn for my a hub. Today is also my 19th Wedding how crazy is that......Anyway, I am trying to remain strong, hub keeps calling, he's at his dad's house. He is recovering from surgery on his leg.
This is the most difficult thing I have ever had to do in my life. The problem is I still love hub just can not live my life in the world of addiction anymore.
It has been a little lonely but peaceful......I do miss him but not the addiction......It is a struggle everyday not to just say come home but I will not, I can not. Kids are also fed up with the world of addiction.
Yesterday went and filed legal seperation papers that was so tough. I know I am doing the right thing, sure would like some words of wisdom on how to stay strong and firm.
He keeps asking me to do things for him and I can't seem to say no. Should I keep the lines of communication open, or should I just shut him off. This is the hard thing.
Even though I know he will always drink, I still have hope that him losing us will wake him up. I just don't know
All I can offer is support and hugs. I can't predict if he will stop even if he loses you. I hope in the meantime you will continue to live your life in the best interest of you and the children despite what he does. Happy Anniversary.
yours in recovery,
Maria123
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If I am not for me, who will be? If I am only for myself, then who am I? If not now, when?
Hi, Andrea, My heart goes out to you in this difficult and courageous time. One day at a time, and even one moment at a time. Blessings and prayers, mebjk
Andrea u do what feels right for you at the time , get out that detachment pamphlet andlet it be a guide , or july 14th in the OdAT . Don't rush into divorce if you can help it ,a piece of paper is not going to solve your problems or living with an A . He is out of the home now and you have time to look after you lots of meetings make new friends. Detach with love and enjoy your time alone.
God will decide if the relationship will contine or not . Just take care of you
I cannot nor should I tell you what to do regarding your husband. Only you can decide what is best for you and your children. It's hard not to do things for the person you love. Just because you are separated doesn't mean that you don't love him anymore. It came down to a question of survival.
For me, this time last year was extremely difficult. Hubby spent a week in detox and then we decided that we should live apart. I needed to work on me, and he needed to work on him. But as you well know, it's been difficult since he came home in Feb. However I do see progress. He actually threw out a bottle of vodka. But I often wonder if he continues what would I do. I know in my heart I could never live with a fully active A. But I try not to project that far into the future. I have to stay in the moment, and continue to work on me. For that is how we get stronger. It takes time. Give yourself that. Let noone tell you when and how you should be doing things. Be still and let your heart think my friend. I'll say an extra prayer for you and your family.
Love and blessings to you sweet lady.
Live strong, Karilynn
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It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
It is so hard and takes such courage to be doing what you are doing.
I asked my husband to leave 6 months ago, after our 20th anniversary. I too could no longer live in the world of addiction. I had to do it for me, my kids and hopefully to wake him up out of denial. I knew in my heart what I had to do and am still following my heart.
You will know, in your heart, what is right for you! There will be times of confusion but remember to be true to YOU. Remember One Day At a Time. Stay strong and best wishes.
