Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Jennifer · Jennifer

Hello (((Everyone))) It's Sully's (mastiff puppy) 5 month birthday today! Hurray LOL silly I know but what the heck I need something to celebrate and since he is spoiled rotten already I might as well go all the way. Today I am going to drop the dogs off at home before work, my AH will be there then but...

Gailey · Gailey

I am trying so hard to stay out of my son's business. Sometimes I just cannot let go of the fact that his business in NOT my business. I find myself wanting to tell him things his wife tells me the children say about missing him etc. I just have to keep my mouth closed and let his HP tell him if it is...

lilms · lilms

I have come to realize over the past few days that I do not know the child my wife speaks of. My alcoholic/addict stepdaughter. I am now realizing that that is part of the reason why I don't get it. I never knew the child and she has been addicted to some substance or another since she...

mistykat · mistykat

I haven't yet been able to attend a meeting, so don't know anything about the steps or how to get started. I have lived with an alcoholic husband for twenty years, but just last night decided I needed to finally do something for myself, since it is pretty obvious that he is not going to change. Wher...

ditto · ditto

We are in the process of getting an uncontested divorce. He has signed all of the papers. The papers are filed with the court. He has left. He has been gone for 10 days, and in those 10 days I have not missed him. While he lived with me he refused to work. He lied cons...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Hi all, I guess I spoke to soon. I just got a call from my "A". He went over to go work on the car. Somehow it caught on fire, and the fire department put it out. So now the car is toast, literally. He said the engine melted. And it is not repairable. He is crying asking what has he done to deserve this. ...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello (((All))), Well as I sit here today pondering whether I made the right decision seperating from hub, my mind and my heart tell me yes....... I have had some difficult days, it has been difficult and at the same time peaceful. Well as peaceful as it can be living with two teenagers..........

drucilla06 · drucilla06

(((family))) I have been thinking about something my mother said to me.She said that she loved my dad ( an A),but it was the man he used to be.Before the alcohol.Years later after the alcohol had taken over and much verbal and physical abuse,she said,when my dad walked in it was not the man she loved at...

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

So this morning hubby starts telling me how his ex has found an inpatient 30-day treatment facility that her insurance will cover. At first I'm confused thinking "huh? for who?" Well, for their youngest daughter (yes, the one we've been having recent problems with). Seems she h...

bob6502 · bob6502

Hiya friends, I just talked to smpoli on the phone a bit ago. Bryon is ill and wasn't able to do his radiation today. They are not sure what is wrong with him. She's upset about his health and missing her family at home. Please send her lots of love and prayers. She appreciates it all. SenoraBob

hudsond · hudsond

Monday and Tuesday were good days for me as far as telling my ex and my current husbands what I thought. I was proud of me. First Monday night I let my ex know that I was very angry and hurt by the way he was treating me. I told him I did not appreciate being lied to and manipulated. I...

jennneeefffurrr · jennneeefffurrr

I have not spoken to my A since late Monday night, when I called it quits with him. I have turned off my cell phone, my only number, so if he calls he goes straight to voice mail...so far, no word from him. I keep seeing visions of these women on talk shows who were involved with alcoholics. The A started...

angeleyes8462 · angeleyes8462

I went to my second f2f last night. It was a great meeting talked about self estem. Made me think alot about how I have been feeling lately. I have been feeling like I really didn't have much self estem. That I have been beaten down alot inside lately. But then I really st...

regrets · regrets

My recovering A of 1 year called to see if he should file the papers since he was in the area of the courthouse. I told him he needs to do what he feels he needs or should do. I'm tired of having to make all the decsions for him so that he doesn't have to accept accountability. So we went back and fo...

txmom · txmom

I've dealt with my ghosts and I've faced all my demons Finally content with a past I regret I've found you find strength in your moments of weakness For once I'm at peace with myself I've been burdened with blame trapped in the past for too long I'm moving on I lived in this place and I know all the faces Each...

tippergirl · tippergirl

I posted another thread about being afraid to let go of my anger. But I think I am also afraid to leave my pity party. I have for a long time felt sorry for myself. When I was a child, this was a way that I comforted myself. I think I still do that. But I wonder how I can break that cycle. How do I stop feeling sorry...

sarahlm · sarahlm

My husband is in jail right now for multiple DUIs and his family hates me because we got into a fight and he bad mouthed me to them. Then we made up, because I went to the jail to visit him. Up until then, I was being the devoted wife, putting $ on his account, visiting, talking to the lawyer, going to court, or...

tippergirl · tippergirl

I struggle with anger all the time. In some ways, I am addicted to anger. It has been a survival emotion for me, because if I didn't have anger I would have cried and felt completely defenseless and hopeless. I am working so hard on me right now and getting out of my depression and trying to let go of my anger...

QOD · QOD

So my AH has been gone for a full week. Just up and disappeared AGAIN. No contact what so ever. I was so mad last week when he disappeared. Then my mom & sister took the kids & me to Nags Head for the weekend. We had a nice time. When I got home Sunday, I knew he...

quest · quest

sometimes i think it is a contradiction to think of a'ism as a disease while saying it is the a's choice to drink or not. if it is a disease and they are powerless over it, then isn't it not their choice? but yet we say they need to hit bottom and work the program steps and they need to make the cho...

kspear · kspear

Good morning all. I know that many of us have difficulties and hardships that we are going through, some as a result of living with and/or dealing with the As in our lives, some just because it is actually just life. I have found, however, as a result of working the 12 steps and pracitcing thes...

jennneeefffurrr · jennneeefffurrr

My A and I had a good weekend...lotts of closeness and love, until yesterday. He called me at 3 and said he had been golfing all day with a friend. Then he said he was on his way to the state park to meet a friend and his GF to go fishing, THEN after that he was thinking of fishing with the friend he had been gol...

babysteps · babysteps

I would like to start a discussion about detachment and boundaries. I believe there must be a subtle art to both, but I haven't figured it out. Several months ago I attempted to set my boundaries by providing my AH a list of expectations. There was nothing radical on the list simply that...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

It is 11am my time. And already we have lost the car, and I just found out that my grandfather has to have heart surgery. I that at 28, having my granfather still here is a blessing. But I am soooooooooo not ready to face the fact that he is getting older. And the thought of losing him. Not even something I t...

angelnomore · angelnomore

Today my Dad & Me smiled it was just a few minutes but it was good. I think this morning when I was so hysterical it was an awakening which led me to my Dad and some how I help him and he helped me. Regardless of how sad we both were it was good moment. Thank you HP and MIP Friends for the replies thei...

maresie · maresie

I just found our a friend of mine has cancer. She has pretty advanced cancer actually which says a lot about her level of self care because she did not go to a doctor for like 13 years. My caretaking is in high gear because of course I am in shock and when I am in shock, I caretake. I want to...

Elizabeth M · Elizabeth M

I am new to Alanon...My husbands drinking seems to only effect me. He will come home 3 4 5 6 hours late. No one else is aware of this. When my daughter asks... I say he his out with friends. Sometimes I feel I am making this a problem If only I didn't care Why ca...

UncleLou · UncleLou

I haven't posted in a while, thank those of you who were asking about me. As some of you know, I've made an attempt to work things out with my ex. The house was sold after the divorce, but the buyers backed out and we decided to try to stay and see if we could make thing work. I was waiting for her to get a new coun...

jojo · jojo

The past couple days I've started to see my own co-dependency...I guess I've always saw myself as a independent person...but my view has quickly changed. I'm seeing how much I've become entwined in the life of my A. I've been very down on myself for not being how I use to be...(into music a...

maresie · maresie

Unfortnuntely my other post about birthdays went awol and the only bit that showed up was at the end. My birthday is on Tuesday. This last year has been particularly difficult which is one reason I came to al-anon. I guess I had to hit a whole series of bottoms to get here. I make thi...

gardengal · gardengal

I thought I would pose this question to all, new comers, and "oldsters" alike. I know for me I was always trying to change someone else's life, leaving mine on the back burner. This is what alcoholism did to me. I would constantly be trying to "fix" him change him to my way of living or thinking. I never tho...

scared · scared

Hi its been quite some time since ive been here. but im in dire need of help. Im hoping at least one of you mite be able to help direct me to were i need to be. I grew up in a home with a father who was an A and was both physicly and mentaly abusive to my mother and I. mom seems to have came thru it ok after his death ( al...

Jennifer · Jennifer

Hello ((Everyone)) Today I am feeling quite unsettled. I got a drunk dial call last night, asking me to come home because he was so lonely, then told he was in the kitchen by the refrigerator .... then the phone got cut off. I did not call back. He is lonely .... why am I worried about if he will have sex w...

greta · greta

I was cleaning up some old files on my computer this weekend. Spring cleaning. I came across this. It was saved in 2003, shortly after I started alanon. I have no idea where I got it from but I am sure I stole it fair and square.

The concept of letting go was so difficul...

Gailey · Gailey

I was afraid to post what I am feeling today but it is eating at me. I need to do something now about my son staying in myguest house. Trial is over. Am I going to allow him to stay or make him go? I am fighting with it today. I know I have to do something because I am feeling so uncomfortable today with not doing a...

angelnomore · angelnomore

Its 200am Pacific Time, I’ve been crying since I put my head down on the pillow. What is about this time that winds me up? I’ve been crying hysterically now for about 3 hours. As soon as it’s 600 am I’m going to call him and ask him why do we have to do this? I don’t get it. The...

iwishuheaven · iwishuheaven

I am sure there are many out there with a story familiar to mine. I am 32 years old and I grew up with an alcoholic mother. As most families do, we never talked about the problem. My father worked out of town and was usually only home on the weekends. I have a older brother who was consider the troublesom...

kissers · kissers

Fear has been so prevalent in my life. I fear confrontation, anger, what others think of me. This stems from growing up with a violent alcoholic father. If we stepped out of line, you could be murdered physically, verbally, and mentally. Trying to not bow down to others out of fear has debilated my life...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

(((((((((((((Hi Guys))))))))))))))))))))), Well thank you to all who responded to my post last night about the water in the gas tank. Last night after my "A" came back he went out and used, sigh, and came back a few hours later drunk and stoned. But oddly enough we had experienced some wonderful c...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

this topic came up over the weekend for me..........boy it was on time............this weekend, i realized i have been running away from my pain.....................>>>>>>>>>>>>>>i

whitie · whitie

Hi all My computer and I have been out of commission for awhile, well I'm still not on the net so to speak accept when I get to this internet cafe. I have started the divorce proceeding and I am waiting for him to be served the papers, for the ti** to hit the fan. It's not like I haven't told him that I t...

Barbara · Barbara

I want to skip over the 2 steps where I need to make amends. But could it be the other person needs to come to me to make amends? I am NOT ready to face my brother. Maybe before his trial end of July but who knows. Can I skip these steps, do the later steps and come back to these?

lilms · lilms

do. ;     ; &n...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

(((Hello Group))) Thanks for the support yesterday, i was really in a yucky place. I really meditated on some of the points each of you brought up. I needed to ask myself if I have been completely honest with myself and my feelings. This morning, my question to HP was did you bring...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Hi all, Well as I shared in the meeting last night, my car broke down on the way to church. I was ok, My "A" said it could only be a few things that could have happened like a fuel filter or fuel pump replacement. Well today he came back from the car with a cup full of water that smelled like gas. Someone pou...

Jeannie · Jeannie

Hi everyone I am so truly grateful this morning. We had a great weekend! My Mom and Dad got here safely. My little guys communion went without a hitch, he looked so cute and it was a wonderful day. He looked like such a little man in his suit. My daughters softball tournament went well. They l...

Becky1 · Becky1

Just talked to my Mom, and had the best news.....she had pneumonia, and is almost over it. Weird to be glad about pneumonia, huh?

Well, to both of us, it was good news, compared to what it could have been. She is feeling much better, just finally having the n...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

today has already started off extremly crazy. while actually i tell my story about last night first. i got a horrible migraine last night and i was given a new prescription to try out from my doc, for when i get migraines. so i took it like i was supposed to. it got rid of the migraine within half an hour but....

seachange · seachange

Edit Post | Quote | ReplySteps Four and Five Hi Everyone! I just want to share something of the process I am currently going through, in working another Step Four. It's been some years since I did the last one, so I picked up that Blueprint for Progress Workbook for Step Fou... >>

quest · quest

hi all, question wrt detachment. i used to react when my a drank, lied, did drugs... lately i have been kind and understanding it is a disease. and it is certainly better for me. i say things like, i am sorry you are having such a hard time... the question is - i wonder if i...

angelnomore · angelnomore

Hi my name is Angelnomore: My boyfriend who has been attending meeting since January has now reached his 90 days actually its over 100. We have broken up. He said he is not able to handle my emotional stuff and he is taking a break; I can call it whatever I want he said bre...

tippergirl · tippergirl

I went to a counselor for the first time iin 10+ years. The counselor handles depression issues which I am very depressed at the moment. He is a marriage counselor and also my husband's addiction counselor. So it was helpful because he has some background info and knows what has been going on lately. He...

nmike · nmike

Hi all, Well, the HP works in strange ways. I had a restless night Friday thinking about my A and him not wanting to come for the weekend. About running my race and how my A and I use to do these things together. Well, I got up early, early and drove to the race. I was not feeling confident. As we warmed up I ra...

Jennifer · Jennifer

Hello (((Evryone))) Quick update ... On Friday afternoon I started thinking I could stay until after work Saturday, that's when I knew I had to leave immediately or I may not. So here I am with my dogs and a few clothes. I miss my cats, I miss my house, I wish I were finishing the gardening projects I ha...

debilyn · debilyn

I just wondered??? love,debilyn

bubbles1990 · bubbles1990

Thanks you all so much for your prayers and there still need!!!! My trip was painful, hard, but learned that i had dealt with how to deal with my alcoholic family when i am around them but not with my Husbands Alcoholic father but he is so different from my alcoholic parents that i forget that HE is a...

girlthing181 · girlthing181

last saturday my boyfriend of 8 years asked me to marry him. i had been wanting this for a very long time and accepted. this should be one of the happiest times of my life, instead i sit here crying as i write this. i have known he had issues with acohol for a few years. it was mil...

Becky1 · Becky1

My sweet little Mom, who will be 86 this Nov. has been having problems coughing a lot for a while now. Thought it was allergies. Went to Dr. for coughing, they took x-rays, now want her to come back in tomorrow (Mon.) to talk about them. I am scared to death. I live in Ohio and my Mom lives in K...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

well things have took a complete turn around once again. my a told me last night that he cant stay sober, that he cant handle it. he has been 41 days sober. these days have been the best. but now he is just giving up. he was in an outpatient program and has been finished for a week. so the cravings started. he s...

tea2 · tea2

I am glad I recalled this link

A friend had passed this along to me awhile back.. I just sent it to a few others and thought it worth sharing here as well. If you wish turn your volume/speakers on -unless on the job, even then -hey they may enjoy too

http://www.llangley.com/yoga/wi...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Today is a new start on ME (Preview) Hello (((Everyone))) It's Sully's (mastiff puppy) 5 month birthday today! Hurray LOL silly I know but what the heck I need something to celebrate and since he is spoiled rotten already I might as well go all the way. Today I am going to drop the dogs off at home before work, my AH will be there then but...	Jennifer	2	472	May 11, 2006 by rtexas
	Minding my own business...I think! (Preview) I am trying so hard to stay out of my son's business. Sometimes I just cannot let go of the fact that his business in NOT my business. I find myself wanting to tell him things his wife tells me the children say about missing him etc. I just have to keep my mouth closed and let his HP tell him if it is...	Gailey	2	344	May 11, 2006 by kent_s
	But I don't know this person (Preview) I have come to realize over the past few days that I do not know the child my wife speaks of. My alcoholic/addict stepdaughter. I am now realizing that that is part of the reason why I don't get it. I never knew the child and she has been addicted to some substance or another since she...	lilms	4	382	May 11, 2006 by tippergirl
	New at this - HELP (Preview) I haven't yet been able to attend a meeting, so don't know anything about the steps or how to get started. I have lived with an alcoholic husband for twenty years, but just last night decided I needed to finally do something for myself, since it is pretty obvious that he is not going to change. Wher...	mistykat	7	461	May 11, 2006 by leo
	Sometimes there is no understanding (Preview) We are in the process of getting an uncontested divorce. He has signed all of the papers. The papers are filed with the court. He has left. He has been gone for 10 days, and in those 10 days I have not missed him. While he lived with me he refused to work. He lied cons...	ditto	2	452	May 11, 2006 by Diva
	Up in flames (Preview) Hi all, I guess I spoke to soon. I just got a call from my "A". He went over to go work on the car. Somehow it caught on fire, and the fire department put it out. So now the car is toast, literally. He said the engine melted. And it is not repairable. He is crying asking what has he done to deserve this. ...	Dolphin123	7	385	May 11, 2006 by leo
	Trying to stay positive (Preview) Hello (((All))), Well as I sit here today pondering whether I made the right decision seperating from hub, my mind and my heart tell me yes....... I have had some difficult days, it has been difficult and at the same time peaceful. Well as peaceful as it can be living with two teenagers..........	Andrea12	7	445	May 11, 2006 by mel123
	love?? (Preview) (((family))) I have been thinking about something my mother said to me.She said that she loved my dad ( an A),but it was the man he used to be.Before the alcohol.Years later after the alcohol had taken over and much verbal and physical abuse,she said,when my dad walked in it was not the man she loved at...	drucilla06	6	423	May 11, 2006 by tommyecat
	Disease Moving on to next generation... (Preview) So this morning hubby starts telling me how his ex has found an inpatient 30-day treatment facility that her insurance will cover. At first I'm confused thinking "huh? for who?" Well, for their youngest daughter (yes, the one we've been having recent problems with). Seems she h...	kismetstrand	5	366	May 10, 2006 by doxie
	an update (Preview) Hiya friends, I just talked to smpoli on the phone a bit ago. Bryon is ill and wasn't able to do his radiation today. They are not sure what is wrong with him. She's upset about his health and missing her family at home. Please send her lots of love and prayers. She appreciates it all. SenoraBob	bob6502	4	327	May 10, 2006 by doxie
	Let them know how I felt (Preview) Monday and Tuesday were good days for me as far as telling my ex and my current husbands what I thought. I was proud of me. First Monday night I let my ex know that I was very angry and hurt by the way he was treating me. I told him I did not appreciate being lied to and manipulated. I...	hudsond	3	586	May 10, 2006 by david62
	I really think this is it...pray for us (Preview) I have not spoken to my A since late Monday night, when I called it quits with him. I have turned off my cell phone, my only number, so if he calls he goes straight to voice mail...so far, no word from him. I keep seeing visions of these women on talk shows who were involved with alcoholics. The A started...	jennneeefffurrr	6	546	May 10, 2006 by Dolphin123
	2nd f2f Meeting (Preview) I went to my second f2f last night. It was a great meeting talked about self estem. Made me think alot about how I have been feeling lately. I have been feeling like I really didn't have much self estem. That I have been beaten down alot inside lately. But then I really st...	angeleyes8462	4	395	May 10, 2006 by david62
	Filing divorce papers (Preview) My recovering A of 1 year called to see if he should file the papers since he was in the area of the courthouse. I told him he needs to do what he feels he needs or should do. I'm tired of having to make all the decsions for him so that he doesn't have to accept accountability. So we went back and fo...	regrets	4	365	May 10, 2006 by david62
	My song for today (Preview) I've dealt with my ghosts and I've faced all my demons Finally content with a past I regret I've found you find strength in your moments of weakness For once I'm at peace with myself I've been burdened with blame trapped in the past for too long I'm moving on I lived in this place and I know all the faces Each...	txmom	7	484	May 10, 2006 by bob6502
	the party's over? (Preview) I posted another thread about being afraid to let go of my anger. But I think I am also afraid to leave my pity party. I have for a long time felt sorry for myself. When I was a child, this was a way that I comforted myself. I think I still do that. But I wonder how I can break that cycle. How do I stop feeling sorry...	tippergirl	3	501	May 10, 2006 by twinmom2
	Stuck-unsure what to do here.... (Preview) My husband is in jail right now for multiple DUIs and his family hates me because we got into a fight and he bad mouthed me to them. Then we made up, because I went to the jail to visit him. Up until then, I was being the devoted wife, putting $ on his account, visiting, talking to the lawyer, going to court, or...	sarahlm	9	458	May 10, 2006 by QOD
	afraid to let go of anger (Preview) I struggle with anger all the time. In some ways, I am addicted to anger. It has been a survival emotion for me, because if I didn't have anger I would have cried and felt completely defenseless and hopeless. I am working so hard on me right now and getting out of my depression and trying to let go of my anger...	tippergirl	3	662	May 10, 2006 by Elizabeth M
	He's Been Gone For 1 Week!! (Preview) So my AH has been gone for a full week. Just up and disappeared AGAIN. No contact what so ever. I was so mad last week when he disappeared. Then my mom & sister took the kids & me to Nags Head for the weekend. We had a nice time. When I got home Sunday, I knew he...	QOD	6	493	May 10, 2006 by QOD
	choice vs disease (Preview) sometimes i think it is a contradiction to think of a'ism as a disease while saying it is the a's choice to drink or not. if it is a disease and they are powerless over it, then isn't it not their choice? but yet we say they need to hit bottom and work the program steps and they need to make the cho...	quest	7	454	May 10, 2006 by horselover58
	Joy and hope (Preview) Good morning all. I know that many of us have difficulties and hardships that we are going through, some as a result of living with and/or dealing with the As in our lives, some just because it is actually just life. I have found, however, as a result of working the 12 steps and pracitcing thes...	kspear	5	431	May 10, 2006 by tippergirl
	He is getting meaner (Preview) My A and I had a good weekend...lotts of closeness and love, until yesterday. He called me at 3 and said he had been golfing all day with a friend. Then he said he was on his way to the state park to meet a friend and his GF to go fishing, THEN after that he was thinking of fishing with the friend he had been gol...	jennneeefffurrr	6	527	May 10, 2006 by jennneeefffurrr
	detaching and boundaries (Preview) I would like to start a discussion about detachment and boundaries. I believe there must be a subtle art to both, but I haven't figured it out. Several months ago I attempted to set my boundaries by providing my AH a list of expectations. There was nothing radical on the list simply that...	babysteps	7	457	May 10, 2006 by babysteps
	11am, is this day over yet? (Preview) It is 11am my time. And already we have lost the car, and I just found out that my grandfather has to have heart surgery. I that at 28, having my granfather still here is a blessing. But I am soooooooooo not ready to face the fact that he is getting older. And the thought of losing him. Not even something I t...	Dolphin123	8	441	May 10, 2006 by hudsond
	My Dad & Me (Preview) Today my Dad & Me smiled it was just a few minutes but it was good. I think this morning when I was so hysterical it was an awakening which led me to my Dad and some how I help him and he helped me. Regardless of how sad we both were it was good moment. Thank you HP and MIP Friends for the replies thei...	angelnomore	1	356	May 10, 2006 by Gailey
	when a friend has cancer (Preview) I just found our a friend of mine has cancer. She has pretty advanced cancer actually which says a lot about her level of self care because she did not go to a doctor for like 13 years. My caretaking is in high gear because of course I am in shock and when I am in shock, I caretake. I want to...	maresie	2	474	May 10, 2006 by Barbara
	doubting (Preview) I am new to Alanon...My husbands drinking seems to only effect me. He will come home 3 4 5 6 hours late. No one else is aware of this. When my daughter asks... I say he his out with friends. Sometimes I feel I am making this a problem If only I didn't care Why ca...	Elizabeth M	5	371	May 10, 2006 by Elizabeth M
	I won't take it anymore (Preview) I haven't posted in a while, thank those of you who were asking about me. As some of you know, I've made an attempt to work things out with my ex. The house was sold after the divorce, but the buyers backed out and we decided to try to stay and see if we could make thing work. I was waiting for her to get a new coun...	UncleLou	10	580	May 10, 2006 by maresie
	my co-dependency (Preview) The past couple days I've started to see my own co-dependency...I guess I've always saw myself as a independent person...but my view has quickly changed. I'm seeing how much I've become entwined in the life of my A. I've been very down on myself for not being how I use to be...(into music a...	jojo	5	474	May 10, 2006 by maresie
	my birthday (Preview) Unfortnuntely my other post about birthdays went awol and the only bit that showed up was at the end. My birthday is on Tuesday. This last year has been particularly difficult which is one reason I came to al-anon. I guess I had to hit a whole series of bottoms to get here. I make thi...	maresie	11	463	May 10, 2006 by maresie
	Question? Do you still care enough to make changes in your life? (Preview) I thought I would pose this question to all, new comers, and "oldsters" alike. I know for me I was always trying to change someone else's life, leaving mine on the back burner. This is what alcoholism did to me. I would constantly be trying to "fix" him change him to my way of living or thinking. I never tho...	gardengal	5	409	May 9, 2006 by tommyecat
	abuse & anger management (Preview) Hi its been quite some time since ive been here. but im in dire need of help. Im hoping at least one of you mite be able to help direct me to were i need to be. I grew up in a home with a father who was an A and was both physicly and mentaly abusive to my mother and I. mom seems to have came thru it ok after his death ( al...	scared	6	3851	May 9, 2006 by Jerry F
	Feeking a need to understand (Preview) Hello ((Everyone)) Today I am feeling quite unsettled. I got a drunk dial call last night, asking me to come home because he was so lonely, then told he was in the kitchen by the refrigerator .... then the phone got cut off. I did not call back. He is lonely .... why am I worried about if he will have sex w...	Jennifer	4	488	May 9, 2006 by Jerry F
	Letting Go (Preview) I was cleaning up some old files on my computer this weekend. Spring cleaning. I came across this. It was saved in 2003, shortly after I started alanon. I have no idea where I got it from but I am sure I stole it fair and square. The concept of letting go was so difficul...	greta	2	532	May 9, 2006 by Jerry F
	trying to set boundaries this week (Preview) I was afraid to post what I am feeling today but it is eating at me. I need to do something now about my son staying in myguest house. Trial is over. Am I going to allow him to stay or make him go? I am fighting with it today. I know I have to do something because I am feeling so uncomfortable today with not doing a...	Gailey	3	475	May 9, 2006 by Jerry F
	HP, help me get through this morning (Preview) Its 200am Pacific Time, I’ve been crying since I put my head down on the pillow. What is about this time that winds me up? I’ve been crying hysterically now for about 3 hours. As soon as it’s 600 am I’m going to call him and ask him why do we have to do this? I don’t get it. The...	angelnomore	3	442	May 9, 2006 by Jerry F
	new to Al-anon (Preview) I am sure there are many out there with a story familiar to mine. I am 32 years old and I grew up with an alcoholic mother. As most families do, we never talked about the problem. My father worked out of town and was usually only home on the weekends. I have a older brother who was consider the troublesom...	iwishuheaven	7	500	May 9, 2006 by iwishuheaven
	Fear (Preview) Fear has been so prevalent in my life. I fear confrontation, anger, what others think of me. This stems from growing up with a violent alcoholic father. If we stepped out of line, you could be murdered physically, verbally, and mentally. Trying to not bow down to others out of fear has debilated my life...	kissers	0	315	May 9, 2006 by kissers
	RE: Praying For A Miracle (Preview) (((((((((((((Hi Guys))))))))))))))))))))), Well thank you to all who responded to my post last night about the water in the gas tank. Last night after my "A" came back he went out and used, sigh, and came back a few hours later drunk and stoned. But oddly enough we had experienced some wonderful c...	Dolphin123	1	467	May 9, 2006 by Jennifer
	SOME day i will run out of addictions (Preview) this topic came up over the weekend for me..........boy it was on time............this weekend, i realized i have been running away from my pain.....................>>>>>>>>>>>>>>i	rosie light shines	1	311	May 9, 2006 by FormalWare
	serving of the papers (Preview) Hi all My computer and I have been out of commission for awhile, well I'm still not on the net so to speak accept when I get to this internet cafe. I have started the divorce proceeding and I am waiting for him to be served the papers, for the ti** to hit the fan. It's not like I haven't told him that I t...	whitie	7	444	May 9, 2006 by FormalWare
	Scared of the step where I need to make amends but could it be other person needs to come to me? (Preview) I want to skip over the 2 steps where I need to make amends. But could it be the other person needs to come to me to make amends? I am NOT ready to face my brother. Maybe before his trial end of July but who knows. Can I skip these steps, do the later steps and come back to these?	Barbara	1	296	May 9, 2006 by tippergirl
	Does anyone else do this-Isolation (Preview) do. ;     ; &n...	lilms	4	511	May 9, 2006 by gardengal
	Coming to terms with the truth (Preview) (((Hello Group))) Thanks for the support yesterday, i was really in a yucky place. I really meditated on some of the points each of you brought up. I needed to ask myself if I have been completely honest with myself and my feelings. This morning, my question to HP was did you bring...	twinmom2	2	370	May 9, 2006 by lebe27
	Praying for a Miracle (Preview) Hi all, Well as I shared in the meeting last night, my car broke down on the way to church. I was ok, My "A" said it could only be a few things that could have happened like a fuel filter or fuel pump replacement. Well today he came back from the car with a cup full of water that smelled like gas. Someone pou...	Dolphin123	5	434	May 9, 2006 by rtexas
	A great weekend (Preview) Hi everyone I am so truly grateful this morning. We had a great weekend! My Mom and Dad got here safely. My little guys communion went without a hitch, he looked so cute and it was a wonderful day. He looked like such a little man in his suit. My daughters softball tournament went well. They l...	Jeannie	3	338	May 9, 2006 by leo
	My Mom (Preview) Just talked to my Mom, and had the best news.....she had pneumonia, and is almost over it. Weird to be glad about pneumonia, huh? Well, to both of us, it was good news, compared to what it could have been. She is feeling much better, just finally having the n...	Becky1	5	336	May 9, 2006 by Karilynn
	aaaahhhhhhhhhhhh (Preview) today has already started off extremly crazy. while actually i tell my story about last night first. i got a horrible migraine last night and i was given a new prescription to try out from my doc, for when i get migraines. so i took it like i was supposed to. it got rid of the migraine within half an hour but....	notsonew1111	4	392	May 9, 2006 by nmike
	Steps Four and Five (Preview) Edit Post \| Quote \| ReplySteps Four and Five Hi Everyone! I just want to share something of the process I am currently going through, in working another Step Four. It's been some years since I did the last one, so I picked up that Blueprint for Progress Workbook for Step Fou... >>	seachange	3	464	May 9, 2006 by Barbara
	detachment - not sure if i am doing it right (Preview) hi all, question wrt detachment. i used to react when my a drank, lied, did drugs... lately i have been kind and understanding it is a disease. and it is certainly better for me. i say things like, i am sorry you are having such a hard time... the question is - i wonder if i...	quest	1	300	May 9, 2006 by abbyal
	I’M TERRIFIED (Preview) Hi my name is Angelnomore: My boyfriend who has been attending meeting since January has now reached his 90 days actually its over 100. We have broken up. He said he is not able to handle my emotional stuff and he is taking a break; I can call it whatever I want he said bre...	angelnomore	9	629	May 8, 2006 by angelnomore
	esh in crisis (Preview) I went to a counselor for the first time iin 10+ years. The counselor handles depression issues which I am very depressed at the moment. He is a marriage counselor and also my husband's addiction counselor. So it was helpful because he has some background info and knows what has been going on lately. He...	tippergirl	4	440	May 8, 2006 by quest
	update on my weekend (Preview) Hi all, Well, the HP works in strange ways. I had a restless night Friday thinking about my A and him not wanting to come for the weekend. About running my race and how my A and I use to do these things together. Well, I got up early, early and drove to the race. I was not feeling confident. As we warmed up I ra...	nmike	4	377	May 8, 2006 by megan
	One day at a time (Preview) Hello (((Evryone))) Quick update ... On Friday afternoon I started thinking I could stay until after work Saturday, that's when I knew I had to leave immediately or I may not. So here I am with my dogs and a few clothes. I miss my cats, I miss my house, I wish I were finishing the gardening projects I ha...	Jennifer	3	408	May 8, 2006 by Jeannie
	Uncle Lou where are you? (Preview) I just wondered??? love,debilyn	debilyn	6	373	May 8, 2006 by Jeannie
	I am back........ (Preview) Thanks you all so much for your prayers and there still need!!!! My trip was painful, hard, but learned that i had dealt with how to deal with my alcoholic family when i am around them but not with my Husbands Alcoholic father but he is so different from my alcoholic parents that i forget that HE is a...	bubbles1990	5	357	May 8, 2006 by aunitedway
	I really need advice (Preview) last saturday my boyfriend of 8 years asked me to marry him. i had been wanting this for a very long time and accepted. this should be one of the happiest times of my life, instead i sit here crying as i write this. i have known he had issues with acohol for a few years. it was mil...	girlthing181	9	466	May 8, 2006 by girlthing181
	Prayers for my Mom (Preview) My sweet little Mom, who will be 86 this Nov. has been having problems coughing a lot for a while now. Thought it was allergies. Went to Dr. for coughing, they took x-rays, now want her to come back in tomorrow (Mon.) to talk about them. I am scared to death. I live in Ohio and my Mom lives in K...	Becky1	14	555	May 8, 2006 by aunitedway
	need esh (Preview) well things have took a complete turn around once again. my a told me last night that he cant stay sober, that he cant handle it. he has been 41 days sober. these days have been the best. but now he is just giving up. he was in an outpatient program and has been finished for a week. so the cravings started. he s...	notsonew1111	10	587	May 8, 2006 by Juster
	happy thoughts (Preview) I am glad I recalled this link A friend had passed this along to me awhile back.. I just sent it to a few others and thought it worth sharing here as well. If you wish turn your volume/speakers on -unless on the job, even then -hey they may enjoy too http://www.llangley.com/yoga/wi...	tea2	2	424	May 8, 2006 by Maria123
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