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Courage to Change April 26
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shares the most important words many hear when they first come to Al-Anon: "Take what you like, and leave the rest." Everything about our program is suggested, not required. We are free to try things, do things in our own time, change our mind, find things th...
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Skorpi
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4/25/23 ODAT - Remembering Our Powerlessness
(Preview)
Today's page captures essential Alanon: * the only person who can move the alcoholic to want to get sober, and become sober, is the alcoholic * my attempts to lever the alcoholic toward what I think is best IS a mistake, and WILL make things worse * this concept also applies to all things we cannot contro...
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Enigmatic
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Hope for Today, Monday, 4/24, lacking consistency
(Preview)
This writer reflects upon lacking consistency with an alcoholic parent in the family. You could never tell how that person would react when drinking, there was no pattern to moods, and you could not depend on parents for anything. This writer tried to stay to themself, walked on eggshells, and los...
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Lyne
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3
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Hope for Today Apr 23
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about finding a path to forgiveness in a seemingly impossible situation. The writer describes being a victim of abuse by her alcoholic father. Her life to a certain point was simply living with the trauma, not dealing with the thoughts and feelings relate...
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yanksfan51
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C2C for April 21, 2023 Tradition Four the Benefits of Diversity
(Preview)
Today's reading reminds us that Tradition Four in Al-Anon helps us to understand that there is unity in diversity. That each group is free to run their meetings how they see fit for the group, as long as it abides by the basicprinciples and traditions of Al-Anon. Meaning the structure and manner can...
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DM2021
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Courage to Change April 19
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shares how learning about the disease of alcoholism has helped them find serenity. Thanks to their new understanding about alcoholism, the author now understands that alcoholics have a disease, they are ill, not bad. This realization helped the author u...
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Skorpi
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4
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198
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My Stinking Thinking
(Preview)
Passage from How Alanon Works page 411: "Over the years, I have spent much of my time trying to bend life and other people to my will, only to fail miserably. I have also tried to change myself, eliminate my character defects, and force myself to feel differently. Again I have always failed. So why di...
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msjuliet
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4/18/23 C2C – Me First
(Preview)
Today's writer felt there were things they were not getting from their qualifier. Encouraged by a sponsor, they wrote a list of what they felt they weren't receiving. In the spirit of Alanon, the sponsor suggested to then demonstrate those very things in their own lives: give what they wanted to rec...
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Enigmatic
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Hope for Today, Monday, 4/17, this work is darn hard!
(Preview)
The writer came face to face with a decision to put principles above personalities, and let it begin with me. Are we able to focus on what we can give instead of what we can get? If we can practice these elements, we can change our attitudes. We can focus our actions on a loving principle which help our c...
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Lyne
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Saturday daily
(Preview)
Do we not have a member for Saturday's daily? :)
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Lyne
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3
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Apr 16 apologies
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- I have been traveling and thought I would be home in time for todays reading and writing. Unfortunately that didnt work out so I am away with no book. I hope everyone has a great week and I will be back next Sunday. Mary
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yanksfan51
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Hope for Today Apr 16- apologies
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- I have been traveling and thought I would be home in time for todays reading and writing. Unfortunately that didnt work out so I am away with no book. I hope everyone has a great week and I will be back next Sunday. Mary
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yanksfan51
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C2C for April 14, 2023 That Old Stinking Thinking
(Preview)
Today's C2C reading brings to light what we all go through in Al-Anon and as time goes on, our negative thinking does some-times become a focal point in our day. It is called "Stinking Thinking" but when we have those moments, when we slide backinto negative thoughts and attitudes, we are encouraged...
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DM2021
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Courage to Change April 12
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shares that it only natural to want an immediate solution to a difficult problem. Often, when we are facing especially challenging problems or long-lasting situations, we might think that something is wrong with us if we cannot easily and quickly solve th...
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Skorpi
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C2C, Monday, 4/10, are we innocent victims?
(Preview)
This reading asks the question: having lived with alcoholism, are we the innocent victims of others' abuse? But with further thought, we realize that we too have harmed others. Some feel an exaggerated sense of responsibility, thinking they owe amends to just about everyone. Listing those we...
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Lyne
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3
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4/11/23 ODAT Not ‘Why them?’, Why Me…
(Preview)
This writer observes some newcomers' desire to understand the why of alcoholic drinking, rather or more than why and how they allowed their own lives to become derailed. The answer for the former comes easy to no one. Alanon guides us to a high level, but sufficient concept that they suffer from an il...
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Enigmatic
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Hope for Today Apr 9
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about finding compassion and understanding for others. The writer describes an alcoholic father who was also violent. The writer always considered him as bad, evil and weak. While the writer understood that alcoholism is a disease, he/she continued t...
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yanksfan51
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C2C for April 07, 2023 Pretensions
(Preview)
Todays reading sums up, for the author, how they learned that their pretensions and expectations for giving a speech to a, new to the author,Al-Anon group were a bit to grand. All their plans were dashed when pretty much everything went wrong. What they quickly learned was thattheir HP knew better...
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DM2021
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Courage to Change April 5
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shares about new challenges we face when a loved one finds sobriety. Many of us have spent years waiting for our loved ones to find sobriety, and may have created happily-ever-after endings that would happen when our loved one found sobriety. Not only does...
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Skorpi
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3
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173
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4/4/23 ODAT - Ill Communication
(Preview)
Maddening: trying to communicate ideas with an alcohol induced person who defies reason, logic, tears, or pleadings. Even less comprehended for both sides are exchanges that involve anger. Today's reading further encourages us to consider an exchange with someone we don't share a common langu...
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Enigmatic
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6
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ODAT in alanon, Monday, 4/3, miracles in alanon??
(Preview)
This writer says that newcomers present with self-pity, resentment, and fears. What they learn in alanon changes their outlook: they gain confidence, poise, come out of their shells, and can concern themselves with others. These results are nothing short of miracles. Reminder: The first gi...
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Lyne
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Hope for Today Apr 2
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading focuses on our perception of conscious contact with a Higher Power. The writer describes spiritual life being condensed to: quiet the mind; open the heart. The writer experiences this in this way: anything quieting the mind=meditation, anything that ope...
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yanksfan51
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C2C for March 24, 2023 Disease of Alcoholism
(Preview)
The author of this day's reading writes about the difficulties loved ones of an alcoholic have believing that the alcoholiccannot just decide to stop drinking as someone who quits say smoking. We are reminded in this reading that alcoholismis unlike any other vice, that it is compared to having an...
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DM2021
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C2C for March 31, 2023 A Sense of Humor
(Preview)
Todays reminder: "A well-developed sense of humor helps me detach from my personal struggles and triumphs." "I will avoid taking myself too seriously today." Todays Quote: "One inch of joy surmounts of grief a span, because to laugh is proper to the man." ~ Francois Rabelais One-Day-At-A-Ti...
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DM2021
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Another fantastic but sad day
(Preview)
It is definitely time to share some of the things that have been going on in my world--the one that revolves around me. Yes, I am full of it today. But, honestly, do I really need to say honestly? If I can't be honest on here when can I really be? So, now that that is said, I can get to the stuff that I am going thr...
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Hoot Nanny
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Hope for Today, Monday, 3/27, compassion requires patience
(Preview)
The writer discusses how difficult it can be to find compassion for oneself and others, and especially for "certain people." We have to look past anger and rage for kindness. We need to let go of resentment from unrealistic expectations. We should ask ourselves, How Important is It? Compassion m...
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Lyne
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5
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Courage to Change March 29
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on the importance of being nicer to ourselves. The author has learned to ignore the voices in their head that tell them that they are not good enough. These voices are a symptom of damaged self-esteem that results from living with the effects of alco...
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Skorpi
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3/28/23 ODAT Why Experience, Strength, and Hope (ESH)?
(Preview)
Alanon meeting opening reminds us of our purpose: to share our experience (of using program principles), strength (from the program, ) and hope (our improved outlook for our future) that helps us remain focused and is encouraging for others. Reminder: Do I consider these elements in what I share,...
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Enigmatic
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Hope for Today Mar 26
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is a focus on some of the protocols of alanon meetings, specifically as they relate to the concepts and traditions of the program. The writer describes being taken aback by how peaceful and quiet the meetings seemed. As someone who had lived in an alcoholic home...
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yanksfan51
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Even after almost a year of court ordered monitoring (thus no booze), brain damage exists.
(Preview)
Recently I had to be in the presence of my exH for an extended period of time as part of a legal proceeding. This was the first time I've been that close to him, for that long, in 2 years. I know he has been under strict court ordered alcohol monitoring for almost a year and thus is as dry as he has been in almos...
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Fedora
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Courage to Change March 22
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shares that many Al-Anon members lost touch with their feelings as a result of living in the contradictory and explosive world of alcoholism. Many Al-Anon members lose touch with themselves as well. Recovery does not mean becoming a different person; for...
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Skorpi
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203
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3/21/23 ODAT The Evolution of Healthy Sharing
(Preview)
A head full of injuries and a heart full of despair often accompany the new member to an Alanon meeting, and are sometimes what fuel the content of first shares. Good it is that a new member finds the group that hears these first pain-focused expressions graciously, as it allows the newcomer to proce...
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Enigmatic
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C2C, Monday, 3/20, how to evaluate worthiness
(Preview)
Some people judge their self-worth by their accomplishments and on what others say. In this manner, a sense of satisfaction is fleeting. But another part of self-worth can be by their ability to love others--saying a kind word, writing a considerate note, or just by appreciating someone else. W...
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Lyne
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1
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221
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Hope for Today Mar 19
(Preview)
Good morning everyone: Todays reading is a look at grieving and how it relates to recovery. The writer describes losing his father to alcoholism and instead of feeling grief, felt a mixture of relief, pity, a vague type of sadness and a lot of anger. In his view, his father had not died because of a resp...
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yanksfan51
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3
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228
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C2C for March 10, 2023 is about Acceptance
(Preview)
This days reading refers to the previous two Friday readings that speaks to the reader about recovery fromconsistently avoiding painful feelings and situations just to play it safe and that we run the risk of not livingour lives fully. Step four should help us to realize those parts of our personal...
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DM2021
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C2C for March 17, 2023 That This Too Shall Pass
(Preview)
Todays reading reminds us that in Al-Anon, with the teachings of the Steps, Traditions, Slogans, courage, faith and our need for each other,each issue we encounter, even the painful ones, will in our journey pass as time goes on and we grow sharing our experience, strength andhope. We ultimately l...
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DM2021
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Courage to Change 3/15
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on forgiveness. Before Al-Anon, the author thought forgiveness was a way to exercise power. They could decide to bestow forgiveness on others and demonstrate their own kindness, but they did not forget the infraction. Now, the author sees forg...
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Skorpi
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158
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3/14/23 Pigeons and Seat Selection
(Preview)
Sitting under a tree with pigeons brought this man what pigeons and gravity can gift. At first angry, he realized it wasn't about him...it was about the pigeons, he just got in the way. Lesson: active alcoholics do what they do, including drink, sometimes we may place ourselves in the path. Our choic...
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Enigmatic
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C2C, Monday, 3/13, shortcomings
(Preview)
The member takes a new approach to Step 7--instead of being tearful or too intense, the member suggests looking at shortcomings with a sense of humor. Can we not laugh at ourselves, and stop taking ourselves so seriously? Real change can come with a belly laugh. If we can move out of our own way, we ma...
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Lyne
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Hope for Today March 12
(Preview)
Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about the effects of negative thinking. The writer describes falling into the habit of negative thoughts when feeling tired, bored or stressed. The tendency is to focus on what is wrong, and that type of thinking can take over. Through al anon, the writer l...
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yanksfan51
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C2C, Monday, 3/6, mind reading
(Preview)
This reading says that no one can know what is in one's heart, soul, or mind, nor know how to meet another's needs, if we don't tell them. It is also unrealistic to expect any one person to be able to meet all of someone's needs. The author used some negative emotions like silently fuming, pouting, and t...
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Lyne
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4
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262
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3/7/23 ODAT Lesson to be Learned from Faith
(Preview)
This page comments on the role of faith in allowing some Alanon newcomers to more quickly grasp and benefit from the Higher Power concept than those without or that have lost faith. A practiced faith in something greater than ourselves from previous spiritual endeavors can offer a great start, but...
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Enigmatic
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Hope for Today Mar 5
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is a focus on the power of love. The writer describes times of worry when it felt like he/she was not doing anything important in life. It felt to the writer as if nothing of much consequence was getting accomplished. As the writer learned more about love: love fo...
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yanksfan51
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Missing in action for years
(Preview)
So happy I decided to look this group up again. Did not remember any of my account information so had a hard time getting back in. I already recognize some names from many years ago. tiredtonight and hotrod are 2 Ive noticed from way back. This disease is always with us but sadly I have fallen into the chro...
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Gailsy
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C2C for March 3, 2023 is about Maturity
(Preview)
Todays reading has no "reminder" or "quote" it is basically a culmination of my previous post on working Step 4that I posted last Friday. It is a list of outcomes that should help the participant doing the 4th Step check onwhether they are working the Step to the best possible outcome for themselves. ...
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DM2021
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3
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Courage to Change March 1
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on how seeking knowledge and understanding can prevent us from making progress. Of course, the author shares that some knowledge is helpful - like looking at past experiences to find information about ourselves and our relationships. Inventor...
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Skorpi
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In Memory of Betty 7/30/1937 to 2/29/2020
(Preview)
"On the death of a friend, we should consider that the fates through confidence have devolved on us the task of a double living, that we have henceforth to fulfill the promise of our friend's life also, in our own, to the world." ~ Henry David Thoreau Betty you are always in my thoughts and your memory liv...
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DM2021
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2/28/23 C2C Step 3 – Not One and Done
(Preview)
Turning our life and our will over to a higher power (Step 3) is not just a one and done, observes today's author. It is something we do more often as we develop and grow spiritually. The circumstances that lead us to Alanon include few or no other choices but to admit our powerlessness and look for help. A...
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Enigmatic
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2
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297
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The 12 Steps of Al-Anon
(Preview)
The steps can be broken down into 4 parts,1 to 3 are about facing up, 4 to 6 are owning up, 7 to 9 are making up, 10 to 12 are keeping up. Twelve Steps1. We admitted we were powerless over alcoholthat our lives had become unmanageable.2. Came to believe that a Power greater t...
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DM2021
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324
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looking for an online sponsor
(Preview)
Hi I live on a small island and am looking to find an online sponsor
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SusannaMaria
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5
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2550
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ODAT in alanon, Monday, 2/27, why do they drink?
(Preview)
Why do they drink when they know it damages themself and the family? How do they justify drinking behavior--after all, they are suffering too? Reminder: Trying to analyze why another person persists in destructive behavior cannot help me out of my own difficulties. I can overcome them only by tu...
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Lyne
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3
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236
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Hope for Today Feb 26
(Preview)
Good morning everyone: Todays reading is on the topic of forgiveness. The writer begins by acknowledging that in his/her early days in the program, he/she did not feel the capacity for forgiveness. The writer also stated that he/she equated forgiveness with accepting unacceptable behavior. O...
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yanksfan51
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139
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First Post -- Would Very Much Appreciate Feedback (Thank You)
(Preview)
Hello, This is my first time posting here, but I have read many threads and they have been helpful in my journey in navigating life with an alcoholic spouse. I regularly attend Al-Anon meetings and rehab support groups, but I've yet to be able to discuss the below out of the shame and fear that it has caus...
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tyt84
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Al-Anon 12 Tradions
(Preview)
Al-Anon's Twelve Traditions1. Our common welfare should come first; personal progress for the greatest number depends upon unity.2. For our group purpose there is but one authoritya loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servantsthey do not gove...
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DM2021
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199
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C2C for February 24, 2023 Grocery Shopping
(Preview)
Today's reading starts out with bringing to mind how it feels to go to the grocery store to find that the item(s) weexpect to be there are gone and that the grocer only needs to take inventory to realize that it is time to restock. For us taking the step to do an inventory on ourselves, by doing the 4th Step...
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DM2021
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3
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186
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Courage to Change Feb. 22
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on decision making. In the past, their desire to make decisions that got them exactly what they wanted prevented them from making decisions at all. In Al-Anon, the author learned that we can never know the outcomes of our decisions, we can only use...
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Skorpi
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131
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2/21/23 ODAT Not Generating Trouble for Myself
(Preview)
'We punish ourselves far more than life ever punishes us' begins today's reading, perhaps a startling claim for some. We may see this in action, however, when we observe the fearful thoughts that can arise in our mind around the alcoholic's behavior and consider the distress we feel as a result. Alan...
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Enigmatic
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Remembering John F
(Preview)
February 17th marked six years since we lost the founder of this site, Miracles in Progress. The anniversary was noted on another MIP message board and I felt a need to acknowledge it here as well. The Al-Anon message board has been the most active at this site and I am forever grateful to John F for it's c...
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tiredtonite
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C2C, Monday, 2/20, standing in the way of recovery
(Preview)
Early on, the member learned that abuse of any kind was unacceptable. Each of us have choices, and we can set limits, give ourselves guidelines, etc. But it took several years to realize that it was they who were still abusing themself. In this case it was verbal abuse--calling themself homely, th...
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Lyne
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Hope for Today Feb 19
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about how we can give any and all anxieties and troubles to our Higher Power. The writer describes growing up in an alcoholic home; her parents were unaware of so much that was happening to the extent that a babysitter abused her and life went on as if nothing had...
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yanksfan51
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