The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Today's reading is about how Al-Anon helps to show how accepting that there is a "natural order of life" courtesy of our "Higher Power" enables
one to realize that trying to control/interfere in any or all crises with individuals around us is better left to unfold naturally by "Letting Go and
Letting God." It is noted that when one allows an individual to handle there own life that it is a way to show respect for them and ourselves.
Today's Reminder: "I am my top priority." "By keeping the focus on myself, I let go of other people's problems and can better cope with my
own." "What can I do for myself today?"
Today's Quote: "I will remind myself that I am powerless over anyone else, that I can live no life but my own." "Changing myself for the better
is the only way I can find peace and serenity." ~ The Dilemma of the Alcoholic Marriage
It is a tough thing to watch someone spiral and not say or do anything.It is not to say that we should stand back and watch someone unknowingly
do something that will harm them without stepping in to grab the back of their coat to stop them from walking into traffic, but to interfere physically
and verbally in an alcoholics life to manipulate a change or to help with the fallout will never show respect for oneself or them. Actually when we
stop interfering we are setting an example of respect for oneself that should stand out to the alcoholic and hopefully encourage them to question their
own path. I have seen a big difference in how the alcoholic in my life acts since I "Let Go" because at first there was a bit of confusion, but with this
individual they like chaos so I have to do a lot of "Letting Go!" I do lots of walking away, but sometimes I do bring the issue to the forefront in
order to maintain my dignity and under those circumstances I have been known to remind him that if it were not for Al-Anon I would have been gone
along time ago, which usually stops all verbal interaction for quite a while.
How has "Letting Go and Letting God" helped you learn to step back and not interfere and have you experienced any change in the alcoholic's behavior?
__________________
"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but it
does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart". ~ unknown
Thank you for your service and share Debbie. Letting go and letting God, Live and let live, and Bless them change me, are 3 things I tell myself often to remind me to mind my own business. I can do this most of the time, but there are moments that I have to think and pause, to figure out the best path for me to take. When my A tells me that alanon has ruined me, I have to say that without alanon I would be long gone. Living with an active and untreated alcoholic is not an easy road. I try the best I can to be compassionate and I ask God to take my anger, disappointment, and frustration with my spouse. Progress not perfection.
I do lots of walking away, but sometimes I do bring the issue to the forefront in