The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Today's page asks us to consider handling hatred or resentment as we would a thorn or splinter: quickly, without hesitation. We wouldn't intentionally let a thorn fester into infection, nor should we let resentment.
The key with both is to take immediate action, don't wait.
Reminder If I don't want the pain, I can simply remove the thought like I would a thorn, not tap into martyr territory and use up our willpower to endure it. Then, I can replace those thoughts with gratitude and love.
"Thou has not half the power to do me harm, as I have to be hurt." - Shakespeare ----------------- In the reading, it suggests that removing resentment could be more difficult and take more time than removing a splinter. I don't think that has to be true for me.
The reading suggests that I dig deep into my motivation to see if I secretly get a satisfaction out of my misery or martyr position. If I let any motivation linger, I am not truly wanting to remove the resentment, so I could unsuccessfully 'work' at removing the resentment for years.
The key for me is to truly want to remove the negative feelings, truly believe that they are detrimental and be willing to remove them completely and replace them with positives.
If I am willing to do that, I can remove the resentment as quickly as removing a splinter. As the reading suggests, the quicker I act, the more likely this is to be the case.
Grateful for the reminders and wisdom
__________________
Paul
"...when we try to control others, we lose the ability to manage our own lives." - Paths to Recovery
Thank you Paul for your service and that wonderful analogy. I hate splinters! So I have a new helping tool when I'm harboring anger or resentment--just imagine grabbing those tweezers and removing it! I know it will not always be as easy as that, but I believe with practice it will get easier and easier, just like detaching, letting go and letting God, etc. Progress not perfection!
