The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Great page that reminds us the source of many frustration and discontentment: expectations that we are not prepared to accept with serenity if the results fall short.
Reminder: I can learn to find appreciation with less than I think should be possible. Contentment comes from appreciation of the good that comes to us, not from being angry at what we don't have. Not resignation, but true acceptance.
"What you have may seem small; you desire so much more. See children thrusting their hands into a narrow-necked jar, striving to pull out the sweets. If they fill the hand, they cannot pull it out and then they fall to tears. When they let go a few, they can draw out the rest. You, too, let your desire go; cover not too much..." - Epictetus --------------- I love this page because it takes the uncertainty out of the 'how much is too much expectation' discussion. Bottom line is that expectation is the origin of possible resentments and general unhappiness when I allow them to get overly influenced by what I want, what I think should happen, and most importantly: when I allow them to rise to heights higher than I can peacefully accept if they go south.
When I stick to the basics, serenity is consistently available.
Grateful for the reminders
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Paul
"...when we try to control others, we lose the ability to manage our own lives." - Paths to Recovery
Thank you Paul for your service and great insight. Betty used to tell me that an expectation was a resentment waiting to happen. She encouraged me to let expectations go. I try, certainly I cannot do it 100%. Progress not perfection. :)
Thanks Paul for your service and to you and Lyne for your shares. The quote is a memorable one that always puts a smile on my face :) So true! I want, I want, I want! It can make me lose sight of appreciation of all my higher power gifts to me each day. As far as expectations of others, I do best when I can remind myself of the positive things others do and bring to my life. It's not a contest. If I measure what others give by what I believe I'm giving, I set myself up for resentment and am driven by my ego rather than humility and acceptance. I'm human and understand that others will disappoint me at times. The growth is in understanding that I, too disappoint people.
-- Edited by tiredtonite on Tuesday 29th of August 2023 07:18:47 PM
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Surround yourself with people and elements that support your destiny, not just your history.
