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Sponsor question
(Preview)
I'd like to begin by saying that my sponsor for the last 3 years has been great in so many ways but I feel like we've stagnated. It is very important to her that with all her sponsees that the first 3 steps be firmly established before moving on to the 4th and beyond. She eplained that her own experience with...
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Whitsey
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10
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4447
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C2C, July 5 -- Detachment
(Preview)
Today's author's defines detachment as "the freedom to own what is mine and to allow others to own what is theirs." After years practicing Al-Anon, the author is able to empathize with someone else's pain without needing to remove that pain. Even when his alcoholic loved one does something wrong,...
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Freetime
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4
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4002
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Using my tools in every-day occurances
(Preview)
I love Al-Anon and how it's taught me to practice the principles of the program in all my affairs. I'm just feeling proud of myself for speaking up for myself. Something that used to be very difficult for me, coming as a person who just wanted everyone to like her. Defending myself and my interests at tim...
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Aloha
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5
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2174
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Practicing the Pause
(Preview)
So I think I am asking for some ESH. A little back-story, as I don't post on here too much about my Ex. 1. Because he is my Ex, and 2. Because I try to focus on me now. Divorce was finalized last Aug. Ex spent a year in rehab and about 6 months in SL. I believe he got a place this past Feb (can't remember exact date)...
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PosiesandPuppies
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9
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3844
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Courage to Change 7/4/19
(Preview)
Today's reading is about Tradition 3...The writer shares how comforting it is to be able to attend a meeting any place and any time, and expect to find no other affiliation promoted by the group. Members will not try to sell a religion, a treatment program, a therapy, a political platform, or anythi...
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Iamhere
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2
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3032
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Did you grow up with a problem drinker?
(Preview)
In my town where I first started my recovery journey, one of our meetings would always start off, after the standard opening, passing around and reading this pamphlet: https://al-anon.org/pdf/S25.pdf I'd completely forgotten about this pamphlet since I moved, as I've yet to encounter any of my l...
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Aloha
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9
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996
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Moment of crisis...
(Preview)
Hi everyone,
Hope everyone is enjoying a lovely Sunday. Right now Im sitting on the boardwalk, looking at the beautiful sunset and scenery, enjoying my coffee and book. 30 minutes ago I was dealing with my AH in a fullon freakout session. My daughter went to her godmothers,( she knew what was happeni...
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Elabella
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15
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2397
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Courage to Change July 3
(Preview)
Hello mip! Today's reading from courage to change is about remembering that everyone is in the hands of HP. The author begins by describing how their group usually welcomes newcomers. It had been a habit that the group followed, not something they had taken a group conscience about. One evening,...
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Skorpi
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5
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551
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This is from June 30!
(Preview)
This from C2C. Edited because of time. I followed a sound in the wood.tying in vain to understand the child's words.when I spotted him. I realized why his words made no sense: why are you repeating the your ABCs? I asked. The child replied I'm saying my prayers. I couldn't help but laugh. Prayers all I he...
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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1574
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Same issue keeps popping up ..
(Preview)
Boundary pushing ... lol .. it makes me laugh. I did wind up outside my hula hoop today and dealing directly with one of our amazing directors .. that consultant I posted about a while back decided to show his butt again. I really don't blame the consultant however I seriously wished when I approved...
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SerenityRUS
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3
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2421
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Do you think that those who chronically drink too much believe their own lies?
(Preview)
I'm sick of dealing with people who make me the bad guy for what they caused themselves and then they lie about it
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WildFlower
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15
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2380
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C2C Reaading 7-2
(Preview)
Thee C2C reading for Tuesday, July 2nd speaks about destructive behavior It points out that many of us identify with negative self destructive behavior such as procrastination . These habits cause us undue anxiety and pain but with the help of the program,-- steps and slogans we are able to s...
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hotrod
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4
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1658
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PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE GUILT TRIPPING
(Preview)
Hi all, I have a question about how to handle someone (a friend who's an acquaintance to some degree but a central part of my friend group). She can be very selfish and seems to think that everyone's plans should revolve around her. She got angry at me in front of everyone because I chose to leave a pool p...
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andromeda
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10
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2640
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Just when you think “we got this”...
(Preview)
The ups and downs of living with an active alcoholic brought me took my breaking point a few years ago. Broken promises, manipulations..most of you know the drill. I did what I needed, focused on myself and was so good with my boundaries (and thats a hard thing , let me tell you). Well 3 years later, trust...
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Crau
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5
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555
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C2C, 7/1
(Preview)
The reading for Monday, 7/1, discusses the problem of having spent too much time feeling badly about who we are and what we have done. It takes time for doubts to fade and wounds to heal, but self-confidence can grow with practice. Suggestions made are to counteract negative thoughts with positive...
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Lyne
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3
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1733
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Step 7
(Preview)
Step Work BoardWhere we discuss each of the Twelve StepsIn the order they are written, one step at a time, every two weeks.https://stepwork.activeboard.com/t65670654/alanon-step-7-7-1-2019/...
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hotrod
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0
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362
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Hope for Today June 30
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about how some of us have sought to fill voids in our lives (for love, attention, approval) with outside sources, such as food, other people, relationships. Recognizing an emptiness and then trying to fill it from the outside is a pattern that many of us have...
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yanksfan51
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6
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262
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do I post too much or too often?
(Preview)
I am feeling a little overwhelmed & am over-dramatizing as well. I haven't been sleeping as well as I would like to. I went over 24 hours the other day! I know that this isn't a fix me site. I just needed to share it because no one knows it but me. I guess the lights are on too long! Meaning that I spend too m...
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Hoot Nanny
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7
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1403
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Learning to work the traditions...
(Preview)
This is something I have never done before- and strongly avoided. To post the same share, to two different groups. Stateside, I was alway impressed with the AA clubhouse concept- where everyone is together. last year I was in such a place in Eastern Texas... and also been to meetings in Rapid City,...
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DavidG
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5
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3103
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C2C, June 28
(Preview)
Today's reading in Courage to Change is about focusing on ourselves. Some sentences really stood out to me: "I always felt my loved one's drinking was a terrible reflection on me, and I worried about what people thought." "His behavior is not a reflection of me, it's a reflection of his disease....
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Freetime
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6
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364
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My Brother Murdered His Neighbors
(Preview)
On March 4, 1980 my older brother, the guy who dabbed mud on my bee sting to stop the pain when I was four-years-old, shot and killed four of his neighbors with his deer hunting rifle. His actions nearly destroyed my family. Rather than delve into it here, I am providing a link to an article I wrote about...
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WildFlower
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16
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3945
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Just because ..
(Preview)
Really struggling with appropriate boundaries with people who have zero boundaries. My parents have no boundaries, either one of them and it's interesting to watch the dynamic. I have spent a lot of time questioning over the past 6 weeks kind of what's wrong with me kind of stuff .. I'm referring to...
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SerenityRUS
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8
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575
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Courage to Change 6/27
(Preview)
Tomorrow's reading is about sponsorship! The author shares that a new member called one day, and after chatting for a bit, the other person asked him to be his sponsor. After a bout of fear, self-doubt, and a subtle reminder that he was being asked to be a helper, not a savior, he accepted with humilit...
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Iamhere
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1
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316
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Is there a length limit?
(Preview)
Is there a length limit to a thread I start and can I insert a link to something? Thought I'd ask first.
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WildFlower
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15
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2205
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Honesty...
(Preview)
I believe that honesty is the way to go! I know sometimes that we tend to be brutally honest. If we are honest w/ ourselves first then to God it becomes easier. I try to practice honesty but sometimes I get caught up w/ doing things & living on egg shells sometimes that I have to be or am dishonest w my AH....
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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2873
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Courage to Change June 26
(Preview)
Hello mip! Today's reading In C2C is one of my favorites. The author begins by saying that forgiveness can be a change of attitude. When the author first came to Alanon, they were filled with bitterness toward the alcoholic. In time, they realized that the bitterness was hurting themself more than...
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Skorpi
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3
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822
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C2C Reading 6-25
(Preview)
Thee C2C reading for Tuesday, 6-25 speaks about denying our own feelings to keep the peace, . It points out that "willingness" is the finest gift we can give to ourselves. each meeting attended and alanon telephone call answered reinforces this willingness We can ask HP for he courage to stand u...
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hotrod
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9
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439
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You are enough
(Preview)
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/you-are-enough_b_7687616
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Aloha
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2
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3502
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Some of my story...
(Preview)
I will only share some of my story but I can go on & on! I just want to say that I found Al anon just in time! I was led to Al anon by some very spiritual people. My first meeting was great. They used the One day a time book & later my mom bought me one. Now we have so many more devotional books from some diff...
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Hoot Nanny
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1
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3373
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You're not old, you're just enhanced
(Preview)
So, at one of my bday parties this weekend I was talking to a much younger friend. She's 29 and I'm 49 now. I was complaining about my age and how my body is definitely feeling older. It takes me longer to recover from a hard workout session, my skin is starting to show that crepe-y look, I have lines and w...
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andromeda
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17
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2690
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C2C, 6/24
(Preview)
The reading for Monday, 6/24, is about having the ability to change ones attitude. The author says that success and failure are a matter of perspective. Prior to alanon we knew great disappointment, and began to doubt our ability to change anything. We were unable to see the great successes we hav...
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Lyne
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3
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3220
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Questions to ask myself each day
(Preview)
I was reading an interesting book when I cam across these questions which the author says he poses to himself each day: 1. What does this have to do with the agenda of my soul? (Before partaking in any activity, discussion, decision, etc.) 2. Is there any part of what I am now seeing "over there" that I hav...
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Aloha
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7
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1104
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Hope for Today June 23
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about the different ways we may be able to work step 12. The writer describes a situation in which she helps an elderly person with a project; the connection with the older person and the hug they exchanged when it was completed meant so much to both of them. Whe...
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yanksfan51
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5
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1790
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Place me where you want me...
(Preview)
Tell me what to do. This is the shorter version of the 3rd step prayer my HP guided me to say. It is short and precise and then I listen. My HP then would responded to me from HP's need and I respond. The consequence has been that both HP and I share in the outcome as well as any others I have been directed to...
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JerryF
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10
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4732
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Grounding
(Preview)
Sorry this is free through today, June 20, the last day. A friend sent it earlier in the week and I forgot til she reminded me today. It's on being barefoot on the grass to ground the body and heal inflammation, which is the basis for all disease, according to this and I've heard that before from a very acc...
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Temple
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4
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3947
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Just stopping by to say "Hello"!!!
(Preview)
Hello everyone!!! Its been a while, but I've just been a mess lately (not al-anon stuff so been talking with my sponsor/friends, etc) my biggest client on Friday mornings, where i've worked for over 10 years now and who pays me as much as my SS check is in a month is floundering we are only weeks away from...
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mamalioness
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8
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6610
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How to forgive and move on?
(
1 2
)
(Preview)
Im having a bad couple of days. Ive been ruminating over past infidelity that my AH was involved in last year. I cant get over it. Im trying to move forward- trying to reason that he was deep in his disease and was acting out of his mind on so many different occasions. Im a reasonable woman. Ive been with thi...
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Elabella
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49
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3756
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We are moving and practicing Letting Go and Letting God.
(Preview)
We have lived in this house for over 25 years and HP suggested clearly that I sell it and just right after the suggestion a neighbor woman walked up my driveway and said...."I want to buy your house". My Higher Power does not forward it's plans ahead of time yet wants me open to receive and act upon whate...
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JerryF
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13
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4288
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Courage to Change, June 21
(Preview)
Sometimes we believe that our loved ones cannot take care of themselves and will not survive unless we do things for them. When crises happen, we have put our needs last. In Al-Anon we learn another option: Let go and let God. Letting go of another person affirms their right to live their own life and...
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Freetime
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8
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2881
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Courage to Change 6/20
(Preview)
Posting for tomorrow as I've got early plans! The reading is about Fear and how Al-Anon gives us tools to respond differently when fear crops up. The writer shares that fear was a daily part of her experience with alcoholism and some of her coping mechanisms were not healthy for her. She found her be...
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Iamhere
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3
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1260
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Can I pat myself on the back?
(Preview)
I have an adult child Alcoholic who I and my husband have (rescued?) off and on for many years. He is married now which brings more people into the circle of addiction and co-addiction and codependency complicated by his spouses family addiction problems and codependency. This last crisis time for m...
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IamLynn
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15
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2645
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Courage to Change June 19
(Preview)
In today's reading, the author reminds us that we don't have to take everything personally and we don't have to see ourselves as the victim of everything that happens unless we chose to do so. When we are troubled by another's behavior, a complicated situation, or a disappointing turn of events, we ca...
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Skorpi
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6
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2636
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C2C Reading 6-18
(Preview)
The C2C reading for today 6-18 speaks about the resentments that many feel when they look at others whose life that SEEMS better===== The reading suggests that envying others is simply a waste of our time as everyone has a different pathIf we open our minds to the possibility of change and understa...
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hotrod
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7
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498
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C2C, 6/17
(Preview)
The reading for Monday, 6/17, talks about surviving crises. With alanon we learn that we can live and even grow through very difficult times. Some of us worry about the future return of crises, and will our tools get us through again? It is recommended to make the most of the day we have, trust recove...
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Lyne
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2
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1617
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The courage to change the things we can- a 12 step inventory [long].
(Preview)
Hi y'all... Saturday morning here, now... just a few quiet moments until the grand-daughters get up. Lovely kids... ... I would expect to discuss medical issues with my sponsor- if I needed clarification- but these issues go beyond this. I believe strongly in seeking medical interventio...
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DavidG
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4
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647
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Going to be buying a home!!!
(Preview)
Hi everyone! So, I decided to take the plunge into home ownership and I'm scared to death! I have never owned a home as a single; I've always been married. I went through the prequalification with a lender last week and he called me a few days ago to say, 'You can qualify for a bigger home if you want but al...
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andromeda
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20
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3345
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Hope for Today June 16
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is a focus of step 5, and how revealing our character defects to God, ourselves and others can help us move forward in recovery. The writer describes getting a bit stuck on step 5, with a list that was completely negative. With the help of another, the writer sta...
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yanksfan51
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3
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314
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The al anon mip story of the screw
(Preview)
In the mip night meeting room some years ago we heard a story of a screw, yes that's right, a screw. It was a symbol of a lesson someone in the group learned, and I cannot for the life of me remember how it went. I find myself in a place these days of needing that kind of visual focus, and would love to hear fro...
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wp
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4
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3991
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Courage to Change, June 14
(Preview)
Step 12 says that we tried to carry the message to others. The author of today's page was a very enthusiastic messenger, dragging their friends and relatives to meetings and preaching to everyone in earshot. This did not work, and they felt like a fool. Then they re-read the step and noticed the part...
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Freetime
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4
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438
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I am not on an island!
(Preview)
I don't feel as isolated & terrified of the outside world. For so many years I have gotten to the place where I felt isolated & alone. But not today. I am certain that I need to be among the living. I was told that you have to share your recovery. I am not supposed to be alone all the time. I have to be av...
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Hoot Nanny
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4
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1595
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Courage to Change 6/13/19
(Preview)
Tomorrow's reading is about Step 11 - where we seek to improve our conscious contact with God through prayer and meditation. How this happens is individual - maybe we look for signs from people around us or in events and unexplained coincidences. Perhaps we seek this power through our feelings, in...
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Iamhere
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3
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1732
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Juggling act I'm tired.
(Preview)
Ok I've been back in my island of origin for a year and a half. Alone with my kids. The distance has been good. I started my degree last year, got a full scholarship this year, the kids are well settled, have picked up a second language, some foo relationships have been restructured and thus restored and I...
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a4l
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6
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525
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New here
(Preview)
I dont even know what to say. I have an AH and both of us are struggling right now. He was sober for a long time and recently has struggled to remain sober. I take care of my mom with Alzheimers so I cant get to meetings. She is in stage 7 but I have no help.
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AnneS
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9
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3261
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how to react
(Preview)
Hello everyone, I don't know if I am in the right chat room, however, I figured someone would be able to point me in the right direction. I am living with a functional drug addict and alcoholic. Meaning no use during the week, but always on weekends. This man keeps a job and pays bills. Every once in a while...
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Luna3104
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10
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2687
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Courage to Change June 12
(Preview)
Hello MIP! Today's reading is about step ten (Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.) The author shares that, since step 10 is a part of their daily routine, they like to think of it as a gentle, warm, and loving way to take care of themselves. By continuing t...
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Skorpi
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3
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399
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Lamest excuse ever
(Preview)
So my AH who is a type 1 diabetic and would drink a lot around sports but now that many major games are done has decreased drinking. So eHR he started drinking the other night I asked if there was a game on and he said no he was drinking because his blood sugar was low and beer was sugar so why not. Omg. Seriousl...
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Dancer66
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13
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3412
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Courage to Change 6/11
(Preview)
Good morning MIP. Today's reading in Courage to Change discusses Step 9...the author asks the question, "How do I know whether or not to take action?" for that portion of the step that suggests we need not make direct amends to those injured if, in doing so, we might cause further injury. The reading g...
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Iamhere
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2
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1514
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The Important Stuff
(Preview)
Hey. Apologies for not being here as much as I could, but it is what it is. We've been attending a face to face meeting regularly now for a few months. I haven't made it my home group yet, but I probably will. Attending a face to face meeting is important and belonging to a group is important. I know that. We g...
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Wolfie55
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6
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3463
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Al-Anon 4th Step workshop
(Preview)
I live in MN and have been looking for a 4th step workshop that uses Blueprint For Progress as a guide. In 2 years, I have not seen one and I have been looking. I would like to put on a workshop specifically using Al-Anon materials. If necessary I will travel out of state to attend and see if others are wi...
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Nadinemel
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0
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284
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Detachment & detschment with love
(Preview)
Hi! Where i could find old purple bookmark on detschment or detschment with love?
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kadriliisa
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3
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2922
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