|
|
Disrespectful
(Preview)
Hi All, It's been a few weeks since I've been active on here - been busy at different doctors and just lots of resting (to my dismay). No new news re the physical illness, but a few updates re ex-A fiancé. The guy I remember made a bit of an appearance (not in person). He called several times and when I didn...
|
Jaclyn
|
10
|
757
|
|
|
|
|
Getting Even..?
(Preview)
So I am new here. Kinda pissed I have to be here, but at the same time I am glad there is somewhere I can go to get a sanity check. Why didn't I come here years ago? My husband and I have been going to marriage counseling after he had an affair. It was very hard for me to deal with - the affair. For years, he has been...
|
LeahLEOWife
|
12
|
632
|
|
|
|
|
Another one lost to addiction......
(Preview)
I'm so very sad. The very first person who welcomed me into program has lost her son to addiction. My heart breaks for her and the family. I don't usually cry when others lose their kids in program but I know this woman. She was the first person I asked to be my sponsor and I always wanted to see her at my e...
|
andromeda
|
7
|
643
|
|
|
|
|
The "Family Disease"
(
1 2 3
)
(Preview)
I'm the alcoholic in the family. I haven't had a drink in 20 years (April 1, 1996), but stopped going to meetings years ago. I've been a dry drunk for the last 15 years. I've recently started going back to meetings, getting a new sponsor, working the steps, and feeling better and better about myself....
|
Michael72
|
97
|
10064
|
|
|
|
|
Ships in the night.
(Preview)
Oh sigh. So the guy next door (nice, super friendly, kind of crazy and obvious drug habit) hasn't been around for over a week and I've been concerned because no-one has moved any stuff out, he took his dogs, didn't ask me to keep an eye on the place etc and hasn't replied to texts..all out of character. Wel...
|
missmeliss
|
4
|
606
|
|
|
|
|
Very weird morning but coping
(Preview)
Today is my day off work for the first day in 6 days. On these days I normally get up when my dog tells me she needs to go out to urinate about 7 AM so I get another hour sleep from my normal 6 AM wake up time for work. This morning at 4:30 AM my dog started barking and growling at the window looking out toward the fr...
|
Doves
|
10
|
652
|
|
|
|
|
Very Sad ****warning - Suicide Mentioned ****
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I know I don't post often anymore, but I still read your posts at least daily (and sometimes twice daily). My life has been amazingly better and my AH has been in recovery for almost a year now. His sobriety date is the 11th, so we are almost there. When he was in the worst place imaginable f...
|
Doingmybest
|
7
|
1012
|
|
|
|
|
A mad house, but the good kind :-)
(Preview)
Well, this morning I was meant to have an annoying appointment, which I was grumpy about, and then it was cancelled at the last minute, yay!! Daughter was having some kind of mental breakdown because we haven't been to the gym for a week and today she had friends coming over to stay tonight which was goin...
|
missmeliss
|
2
|
874
|
|
|
|
|
Hope for Today April 5
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Today's reading is about our acronym HALT: are we Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired. For me this has always been such a good and direct way to check in with myself about how I am feeling. I still have difficulty being direct -- especially with myself! I am reminded of my teenaged d...
|
yanksfan51
|
2
|
593
|
|
|
|
|
The Wheels on the Bus... Go Round & Round.. :)
(Preview)
Hello MIP Family... This Last Month has been an Up & Down Roller Coaster.. I Remind Myself Daily that Things can Always Be Worse, and Truly on the Surface they are Really Not Horrible, but still pull at the Heart Strings pretty Regular... My Shining Star, My Son who I was Going to SAVE (Insert Sarca...
|
Jozie
|
10
|
767
|
|
|
|
|
Still confused on something
(Preview)
I just ordered the book "Getting Them Sober" for some answers.. but still in the meantime I am so confused as to what I say or do the next day when he wakes up and says sorry, he is tired of disappointing us and that he just had a relapse and that he is doing his best. (he is trying to get sober) I use to get rea...
|
Aerin
|
4
|
624
|
|
|
|
|
testing
(Preview)
I keep getting a message to say my IP has been blocked, so, just testing to see if I can post  Smooches!!! Looks like it worked but I continue to get the message saying all posts from my IP address have been blocked because of suspect activity. Anyone else experiencing this issue? -- Edited by missmeli...
|
missmeliss
|
7
|
577
|
|
|
|
|
some of my co-dependent relapse signs
(Preview)
Well, thank you school bus driver for bringing some of my sickness to my attention again in order to take action.
I still fear the elephant and close my eyes.
Then I procrastinate.
Then I spend days, weeks, months and years still closing my eyes and panicking because the elephant gets bigger and big...
|
a4l
|
4
|
674
|
|
|
|
|
Sad tonight.
(Preview)
Went to get daughter from my mums tonight (My mum picked her up from her dads). It was a long way to go, on what was meant to be my first day off in ages, but daughter had sent me so many distress calls from her dads telling me that she was miserable that there was no way I could not go. Plus mother had offered di...
|
missmeliss
|
13
|
817
|
|
|
|
|
lost my serenity..when will I learn?
(Preview)
This morning was not awesome. My son gets collected for his autism intervention class twice a week. I have had some issues with the driver, who is rude and not the sharpest tool in the shed. This morning daughter had a dental appointment. I made the time for 9.30. Yesterday the driver was here at 8.50. He...
|
a4l
|
14
|
904
|
|
|
|
|
Detaching With Love
(Preview)
The solution to obsessiveness is to learn to detach with love. Detaching with love doesnt mean that you stop loving the other person. It means that you make a decision to back up and stop putting all of your time and energy focusing on someone else. It means not allowing the drama of someone elses addict...
|
LinSC
|
6
|
711
|
|
|
|
|
Just Wanted To Share
(Preview)
I'm taking college classes online. One of my current classes is "Marriage and Family" for my Humanities credits. In my required reading for this week, there was a chapter about the Social Exchange Theory. Basically, its saying that in a marriage, a person would only want to stay in the marriage if...
|
WhiskeyLullabye
|
3
|
556
|
|
|
|
|
Yoo hoo
(Preview)
|
el-cee
|
8
|
657
|
|
|
|
|
Very Angry
(Preview)
It takes a lot to get me mad. Right now, I'm furious. I mentioned that I live in a very small town, right? I have a friend who works in the HR department at Wal*Mart. I asked him if he could tell me why J was fired. He told me confidentially and I can never prove that he said it and he could get into trouble fo...
|
WhiskeyLullabye
|
7
|
688
|
|
|
|
|
introduction and question
(Preview)
Hi all! I am new to this Forum. My story is an interesting one although it may sound a bit over the top. My husband started drinking in 2009 and finally he chose to go to rehab in March 2015. We have three children. During the last 3 years of his active alcoholism (2012-2015) he was having an affair with his...
|
hopeful987
|
6
|
785
|
|
|
|
|
Courage to Change 4-3-2016
(Preview)
The C2C reading for April 3 Speaks about the fact that at the beginning of this alanon journey, the fear of attending Al-Anon meetings was huge and at times overwhelming . Our biggest fear was that someone we knew would be there and know our secrets. It points out that the principles embodied in A...
|
hotrod
|
4
|
619
|
|
|
|
|
My BF is 3 months sober...and I am not happy
(Preview)
My BF and I have been together for about a year and a half. Most of that time he was a high functioning alcoholic. It really didn't sink in until he moved in with me and I saw that it wasn't just a weekend thing. We had fought about his "heavy drinking" prior to his moving in but nothing changed. I know - I s...
|
z88174
|
10
|
1740
|
|
|
|
|
I need advice
(Preview)
I need advice. I've been with my boyfriend for about 11 months now and we've been living together for about 9 months. I'm not a drinker at all and when I met him, he was like, "Yeah, you're not a drinker and I don't want to drink anymore." He doesn't drink all the time, but when he does, I get concerned about...
|
justwondering
|
4
|
561
|
|
|
|
|
Courage to Change (C2C) 4/1/16
(Preview)
Good morning MIP family! The C2C had no reading for today so no summary...... JK - April Fool's!!! Today's reading talks about Acceptance being one part of the three A's - Awareness, Acceptance and Action. We might be inclined to jump from awareness to action without even pausing for acceptance...
|
Iamhere
|
2
|
630
|
|
|
|
|
Ok is now my favorite word.
(Preview)
At Christmas time before I really knew what I was dealing with in regards to my A, I had already made the decision I wanted to change things and start living the way I wanted to. My A Son had already moved in with his father and I was detaching with love. My A stepson had a home of his own and we were okay with...
|
Fooled
|
4
|
685
|
|
|
|
|
finding the lesson from the chaos I helped create....
(Preview)
I was sitting here typing up the hell-ish day I had with my exABF; each time I type a sentence I erase. Realizing how ridiculous my decision have been to get me to this level of chaos that I am facing right now. I am still trying to control things despite us not even being together. However; he moved out b...
|
Crau
|
4
|
658
|
|
|
|
|
Miraculous half a day. Thanks HP and Al Anon, AA too
(Preview)
Breathing rich, fresh air. What a wonderful half day so far. A is sleeping, waking up sleeping. In between, he is doing v useful things for himself and for me. Took him out for a morning ride when we had wonderful breakfast (at 1/5 the cost. V imp. He usually likes only expensive breakfast.) He was happy t...
|
manas
|
5
|
651
|
|
|
|
|
okay ladies does your mind work this way?
(Preview)
So, I haven't dated in a looong time. I have been asked out to dinner. I consider him a friend, we have known each other for a while. We actually went to school together, so we talked every day. I was very comfortable talking to him. I don't see any red flags as far as temperament.He was very respectful. I wo...
|
mjferg
|
26
|
921
|
|
|
|
|
When It Rains, It Pours
(Preview)
J got fired today. And, it had nothing to do with his drinking. He has not once been drunk at work. I know he hasn't because I was taking him and picking him up. Small towns are a pain. He worked at Wal*Mart. My ex-husband's sister works there. She said something about him to management and they fire...
|
WhiskeyLullabye
|
2
|
614
|
|
|
|
|
mixed feelings and guilt
(Preview)
I am having a rough day today. My mom is in a nursing home and has been having some problems with her feeding tube, she stopped eating so they feed her now. She always took very good care of herself, she only ate very healthy foods and didn't smoke, kept her weight down,etc. Basically a very health conscio...
|
mjferg
|
4
|
851
|
|
|
|
|
Feeling hopeful
(Preview)
J came over last night for a short while. He was completely sober. We spent some time cuddling and talking - basically just enjoying each other's company. I never feel better than when I'm laying next to him with my head on his chest and his arms around me. I think that's why this semi-separation is s...
|
WhiskeyLullabye
|
5
|
673
|
|
|
|
|
First step
(Preview)
I've been thinking about the 1st step a lot lately. To me powerlessness over the alcoholic or his behaviour used to mean defeat so I kept on trying to employ various tactics to gain power over this disease and my sons actions therein. And of course my "tactics " only made the situation worse, escalated t...
|
Doves
|
3
|
618
|
|
|
|
|
Ehe ..
(Preview)
This has been a tough week in terms of emotionally for me, I think there is a lot going on .. lol. Easter, birthdays trying to complete a few things knowing that the attorney still won't be done until May. Last night my boy was the social kid, he did a dance with his "new" girlfriend .. LOL. I did tell him...
|
SerenityRUS
|
8
|
626
|
|
|
|
|
Courage to Change Reading 4-2
(Preview)
The C2C reading for April 2 speaks about being gentle with ourselves in times of crisis. We may be able to push ourselves hard when things are going well, but we invite trouble if we try to do this when we are struggling to manage the basic activities of life. The reading points out that we often feel that...
|
hotrod
|
3
|
3335
|
|
|
|
|
Gah.
(Preview)
Oh what a fun week. Today was the pinnacle. This morning I had a very important exam, in town, so I studied until late last night, slept a little then got up early and went to town. Very hard to concentrate with all of the face-ache drama going on but, I think I passed. After the exam I was desperate to get hom...
|
missmeliss
|
4
|
623
|
|
|
|
|
Last Day On A Miserable Job
(Preview)
I just need to ask for some support if possible. I finally got another job in a new department, same company. I have worked here in this one for 2 years. We order for over 100 clinics and the entire hospital.the ladies are so self centered and being only 4 of us, we have 2 that take off repeatedly, are rude, e...
|
TrishaG
|
9
|
672
|
|
|
|
|
Trying to let go let God
(Preview)
Last night my teen son who binge drinks on weekends with his friends and I can only estimate from what I've seen smokes weed 2-4 times a week came home after school and work and announced that he is probably going to buy a car tomorrow ( which is now today)! He only has his G1 driver license (equivalent to th...
|
Doves
|
6
|
862
|
|
|
|
|
I just knew I could pull it off and it still slays me...April Fooling....
(Preview)
I was sitting at the breakfast table in deep decision as to whether I should do it or not and then...truth is I could not not do it. What was the "it"...and April fools joke with my spouse. Her back was to me washing dishes and so I started, "That was a weird way to wake up this morning with a Mo`o (house l...
|
Jerry F
|
5
|
677
|
|
|
|
|
Alanon Meeting
(Preview)
I am REALLY bad at the whole time zone thing. I live in Missouri, which I think is central time? So if the meeting is 9pm eastern time tonight, that would make it 8 am my time? Right? I hope that's right. I want to participate. It will be my first ever meeting. I told my boyfriend this morning that I wa...
|
WhiskeyLullabye
|
1
|
480
|
|
|
|
|
It finally happened
(Preview)
he got high. I could tell as soon as he answered the phone. so of course I had to prove it by FaceTiming him. I can always tell even just a little. It's that fake pot chemical crap. He lied- he's fine just tired yada yada yada. I just hung up. I face timed back. I asked him why he was lying when we agreed to be ho...
|
kspec85
|
7
|
776
|
|
|
|
|
My boyfriend is an alcoholic
(Preview)
Right now I'm completely heartbroken. I've known that my boyfriend had a drinking problem for a long time. About 5 years ago, he lost his license for drinking and driving. I've been trying to support him and help him through it, but there are some things I won't accept and I made those clear. One of t...
|
WhiskeyLullabye
|
9
|
798
|
|
|
|
|
New and need to find support
(Preview)
Hi all. I'm new here. Not sure where to start, but I guess background first. My husband is 42, I am 40,we've been together 3 years, married for one. I have 3 daughters (18 & 16 y/o twins) and he has one son (13). The girls live with us, his son is in AZ. We moved to Germany almost 4 months ago. This is the s...
|
Peaf
|
6
|
784
|
|
|
|
|
Dear Higher Power...
(Preview)
Thank you for the many gifts I have in my life today. I most likely always had gifts but was too sick to see them. Not physically sick but spiritually and mentally sick. My distrubed and distorted thinking caused by the disease of alcoholism filtering through the generations of my own family acted like...
|
el-cee
|
4
|
604
|
|
|
|
|
Just need advice from people in similar situations.
(Preview)
I have been with my fiancé for 3 years now.. I have a son from before and we have a daughter together. I knew he liked to party when we met and due to me having my son at an early age I was intrigued by this environment. It was not an everyday thing and he seemed fine when we were out. It was a few months into da...
|
Layla Marie
|
3
|
1053
|
|
|
|
|
At wits end, don't even want to go home
(Preview)
Hi all My husband's drinking happens everyday. This desease is way bigger than him now. Right now I cannot even ask him a simple question he is out of it. I've gone thru so many apologies, then the very next day BOOM he's at it again. I am going to a depression group, on meds that don't help me calm down while...
|
Worried Wife
|
5
|
708
|
|
|
|
|
Responding vs Reacting
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, I've been working through some disappointment concerning a new job I accepted and have now left. I've been inventorying myself, looking at where red flags might have been present in the interview process. I have found a few and realize I should have resisted accepting this job. Some red...
|
tiredtonite
|
3
|
1120
|
|
|
|
|
When an adult child is an alcoholic
(Preview)
Hi, everyone. This is my first time here. My twenty-seven-year-old daughter who works and lives out of the house is an alcoholic. She was diagnosed with OCD and depressive tendencies about eight years ago and was on medication that was no longer working. She said she turned to alcohol to cure her anxi...
|
Hope4Healing
|
14
|
907
|
|
|
|
|
Get up and go still hasnt come back
(Preview)
Even before AH went to rehab in January he came home from work and plopped on the couch and slept. Every household responsibility fell on me. He has always admitted he is a napper. Now since he has been home for about 7 weeks, this behavior has returned. I have to nag him to get anything completed....
|
Fooled
|
4
|
692
|
|
|
|
|
Trying to understand
(Preview)
Since the last ABF last binge, I have lost all feelings of love and respect toward him. I look at him and I am disgusted and I think to myself, what a loser he is. He has nothing worthwhile to give to me and what am I doing with him? I deserve better, not a selfish jerk that only has one thought, alcohol. I am try...
|
joker
|
6
|
873
|
|
|
|
|
High Functioning Alcoholic husband
(Preview)
It's taken me 6 years to realize my husband is a HFA and marijuana addict. 6 years of a rollercoaster and i'm only just getting help for myself - just finding out that i'm not as crazy as he told me i was. I'm so relieved by everyone's posts - to know that it's not just me, but that so many are suffering t...
|
jilld30
|
6
|
3080
|
|
|
|
|
Enabling Behavior
(Preview)
Repeatedly bailing them out - of jail, financial problems, other "tight spots" they get themselves intoGiving them "one more chance" - then another...and another...Ignoring the problem - because they get defensive when you bring it up or your hope that it will magically go awayJoining them in...
|
LinSC
|
6
|
890
|
|
|
|
|
If Iamhere is on the board right now
(Preview)
Please read my private messages to you as I need your help
|
Doves
|
9
|
846
|
|
|
|
|
Step 6
(Preview)
Step 6 has been posted to teh Step Work Board-- Please join in and share your ESH Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t61912861/alanon-step-6-3-31-2016/
|
hotrod
|
1
|
677
|
|
|
|
|
Courage to Change (C2C) 3/31/16
(Preview)
It's the last day of March and I hope each of you have a great day! Today's Courage to Change reading talks about how many of us who have lived with alcoholism truly begin to grow up for the first time when we reach Al-Anon. We learn to face the real world and to own our actions/reactions. We begin toI beco...
|
Iamhere
|
3
|
974
|
|
|
|
|
I am brand new here-Boyfriend binge drinker-I cannot trust him
(Preview)
Hello everyone! This is my first time ever posting to a board like this. I have read through a lot of your posts and they have helped. But I am so new that I am still learning. I hope I make sense in my post so here goes.. I am 45, my boyfriend is 44. We are both divorced with a child each. We do not live together. (...
|
Aerin
|
5
|
746
|
|
|
|
|
another insane day
(Preview)
Yesterday, it was another nightmare. We went to church and my sister called me and asked me to drive her truck after church. The abf got mad, as I was going to my sisters. I see he is trying to isolate me and not let me have any outside contacts. He got mad and left. He lost his drivers license so I have to drive...
|
joker
|
8
|
794
|
|
|
|
|
So upset
(Preview)
just really frazzled right now over today's events and incidents. Send prayers, really need them right now and praying this situation that arose today gets straighten up soon so I can enjoy my recovery.
|
Doves
|
3
|
514
|
|
|
|
|
To Jerry F
(Preview)
when you are online please look at your private message as I sent you one as I need administration help. Thanks
|
Doves
|
7
|
714
|
|
|
|
|
Courage To Change 30/3
(Preview)
Todays c2c reading speaks of the confusion and resistance many of us feel when we arrive at al-anon and are told to "keep the focus on ourselves". Many of us reject this notion because it sounds so foreign, selfish and similar to the way our qualifiers behave so, why would we ever want to be like that? The...
|
missmeliss
|
2
|
576
|
|
|
|
|
If hotrod is on here
(Preview)
Hotrod: I private messaged you and need your help. Thanks
|
Doves
|
0
|
581
|
|
