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No Trust
(Preview)
I'm fairly new here and with family visiting for the month haven't had much time to log on. I really need to vent right now. Last August I left my home in MA to move to FL with my A. It was going to be fresh start for both of us. Driving down from MA he got a DUI in NC. He had to app...
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Froggie
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4
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377
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I GIVE UP
(Preview)
Hi Everybody,
I haven't posted in a while. But I have still been here every day, reading and learning. Anyway, a lot has happened lately.
My husband, a meth addict, admitted to being high to his parole officer on Halloween. So his officer made him do meetings. Then he wa...
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browneyes
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9
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448
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still lost on the point
(Preview)
Hi guys,
I mentioned a while back I started going to counseling in addition to alanon, at the suggestion of my sponsor, to deal with something that is going on in my marriage.
As part of the working through the issue in my marriage, we have fallen on issues relating to my parents. We learn what we...
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pixel04
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6
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363
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thanks for being here
(Preview)
thank you for all your support, I do appreciate it. I am still dragging myself through these holidays...no feeling for them really...I detached from most everything, except the As in my life..thought I had done really well, and then one came back into my life.my father..and hes brought the ba...
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kat4u
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4
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311
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updated on Bubbles123
(Preview)
Hi ((((((everyone))))))
I just thought I would let you all know that I am doing well under the STRESS that my family and I are experincing right now with the lose of my Hubbys job yesterday!!!
I just keep thinking" one day at a time" and" take it easy "and that my Hp will see us through this and to lo...
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bubbles1990
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6
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572
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I am numb and emotionless
(Preview)
I guess I would have been really tickled by pounds of gummi bears because he spent his entire paycheck on crack. Gee, he was nice enough to bring me home a pack of cigarettes. All I have heard is more promises and how scared he is and how powerless he is. Big flippin deal. I've li...
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Powerless
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6
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373
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Taking one Day at a time, But
(Preview)
I try to take one day at a time, But sometimes several day's attck me at once.
Timeline
Monday Dec.5, am
I call police and have my A arrested for under the influance. Last used meth. on Sunday. He was disorented, anxiety,confused, age...
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bluecrow
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6
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337
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The world surprises me daily
(Preview)
I went to a baby shower yesterday - dreaded going because 1. they make me depressed an 2. it was about 20 minutes away from my ex's house. But I went and I interacted, etc. The shower was for my ex-neighbor who is also my godmother's daughter. My godmother's son is my oldest friend and someon...
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Cyn
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5
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313
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Feeling insane and sane and confused
(Preview)
I feel very confused. I have had days of mental torment.I feel very guilty of my feelings,i feel like i have been a waking dead.My nights seems very confused i have endless dreams fearing that i have been trying to question my relationship with a loving God.It feels like i have always had a clear conciou...
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hopeful
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3
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334
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please help....
(Preview)
can someone explain or show me what or where to find the recovery programme for alanon members?
is it only the alcoholics that have the 12 step programme?
or do we have our own?
any help would be greatly appreciated
rebecca xxx
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Rebecca
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5
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385
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Is it progress?
(Preview)
Hi all,
I have had plenty of time to think, I know scary thing, today while I am at work. A thought just hit me, am I really progressing in my program? Sure my "A" went out all night, he was doing what he does while he is active. I am upset over this, again, so am I progressing if it still hurts.
Sure I know th...
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Dolphin123
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4
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326
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Unwelcome Xmas Visitor
(Preview)
My A called me at work today to say his father (also an A) is coming for xmas. He will be staying with us for day or two (his day or two ends up 2 weeks). He runs up our phone bill, eats all the food and doesn't chip in at all. Last time he stayed with us when my A was very sick year and a half ago....
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lebe27
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8
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544
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Responding vs Reacting to Projecting
(Preview)
For the past week I have been experiencing some female problems that I've never had in my life before. At the beginning of this week timeframe, I looked up these symptoms in my medical book and saw words like "30 to 60% cause of hysterectomies" and "cancer". There went my mind - projecting...
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kismetstrand
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13
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654
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feeling down
(Preview)
Why is it that I know I am powerless--I get that--over my a's drinking and drugging, and yet I still get upset when things aren't going the way I think they should be going.
This week hasn't been a bad week, necessarily. My a has been "off" not using I think, but something just isn't right. (I say n...
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hudsond
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3
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325
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He's Out of The House
(Preview)
Last week I had to have a protective order served on my husband. He was drinking and started an argument with me over my son calling home to wake him up. My son was letting me know he would be late coming home. My husband went into a rage, dumped all of my instructional items out of my teacher bag and began pac...
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meowzmusic
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6
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512
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Oz computor,help again John
(Preview)
Hi,
It's Sat., the 10th of Dec., and I can't get into chat room again. It says connecting 6667 but you wait forever and no connect. It's the morning meeting, your time ESt about 9:00. Help!
a computer desperate toto
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toto12
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1
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297
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I am sad...
(Preview)
I had a bit of a fall out today... my grandparents are still downsizing alanon,and saying why dont I hang around kids my age.hello kids my age are rebels,and do weird things.I don't want to be like that
My grandparents should be happy I am putting most of my time to something positive,and s...
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Lauren ashley
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6
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424
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bail out or not?
(Preview)
A freind in ALAnon called me yesterday. Her husband got arrested for DUI again. He called and betggged her to bail him out and she said no. He said he was having heart flutterings and refused to tell them. She said what if he dies and I did not go bail him out?
I was trying not to give advice...but wh...
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afglin
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7
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451
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this is it
(Preview)
well my a came home after work and grabbed the two bags i had packed last night wouldn't give me his keys and said he'll be back another time to give me money to pay the rent. he said he has to go to the casino with his mom. i hate this feeling so much. he is acting like he just doesnt care and i know he's lying abou...
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notsonew1111
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5
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362
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Please forgive me if I sound angry,
(Preview)
Okay, I have to admitt, I am angry. I just don't understand.
I have been trying to accept this as a disease. I have been trying to just take care of myself and the kids. I have been trying to be compassionate and stay out of his stuff.
Then I talk to a lady at the rehab that tells me that no he does not have to...
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Jeannie
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9
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478
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Gratitude
(Preview)
Dear Friends,
I would like to express deep gratitude to the new family that I have found you. Thank you for all the support, it has made the world of difference. Maybe you answered my postings or maybe you read them and sent silent prayers&nb...
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bluecrow
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3
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360
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Coming out of Denial
(Preview)
You all may know from earlier post that I left my husband a month ago. It hasn't always been easy but I don't regret my decision at all. It seems that I am now coming out of a fog. We all talk about the alcoholic's denial but I am also having to deal with my own denial. Looking back I...
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JulieLynn
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4
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356
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Input please?
(Preview)
I have been reading the posts and responding to some but have been so busy and tired. Today makes 25 days my A is clean and sober! He is tired and of course irratable on and off. I am trying to stay focused on me. Of course he isn't going to meetings or counseling he is a "tough guy"...
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marmare
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4
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403
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another problem... can you help?
(Preview)
hi guys,
i was trying to figure out for the most part of today..what or how do you separate the addiction from the person? my ex makes sooo many promises and is all plans about the future but for some reason i cant distinguish what is fact and what is fiction! i want to believe him when he says he wants a bet...
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Rebecca
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4
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550
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asking for help is NOT asking for rescue
(Preview)
FRIDAY , DECEMBER 09, 2005
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go </OA_HTML/ibeCCtpItmDspRte.jsp?item=1271>.
Asking for Help
It's okay to ask for help.One of the most absurd things we do to ourselves is not asking for the help we need from a friend, a family member,...
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rosie light shines
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4
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332
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esh please
(Preview)
hi everyone im asking anyone to respond if they want to about their stories about leaving the a in their life and how they are better for it. i need to hear the hope that if i choose to ask him to leave i will know im doing what's right. i want to hear what i do have to look forward to. because i know if i stay there...
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notsonew1111
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8
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937
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Doormat syndrome
(Preview)
I have a picture of a narcissus flower hanging in my apartment.
It has been there since I moved into my own apartment in July after leaving my alcoholic husband of 14 years in May.
It is there to remind me that I live here, apart from my emotionally abusive A to take care of myself.
I hit my bottom. I...
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megan
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12
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521
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Ending relationships
(Preview)
This is really hard. I've been back and forth with my A for over two years now. The issues run deeper than this disease for me...intimacy and communication were a problem from the start.
We broke up (for the upteenth time) about a week ago, but decided to stay friends (that didn't work) h...
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Faith73
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5
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580
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i am soooo done
(Preview)
well i think this is it. my a has shown me in every possible way that he does not give two sh**ts about me. im so hurt and hate this feeling. in the past i would wait until tomorrow to see what he has to say. i need to stop this. this is my life to control and i cant keep waiting to see what to do untill i know what he'...
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notsonew1111
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7
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679
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Song I heard tonight - hit home...
(Preview)
I heard this song today - hit me really hard!!
Gone - By Kelly Clarkson
What you see's not what you get With you there's just no measurement no way to tell what's real from what isn't there Your eyes they sparkled That's all changed into lies that dropped like acid rain you washed away the best of me you...
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Cyn
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3
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428
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Awareness
(Preview)
I am sitting by the fire going over in my mind my conversation with my A tonight. I was going to prepare myself before he called but he called earlier than expected. I thought I should seek guidance from my HP on what to say and then we wouldn't end up fighting or yelling. At least now I am gaining some awaren...
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nmike
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3
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301
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I`m so mad
(Preview)
My A got pulled over 2 nights ago for failure to yield...He`s on probation for domestic,he has no insurance,he was drunk,and had open intoxicants in his truck. Guess what????They let him go!!! If it was me I`d be sent to prison for 20 years!!
Sorry just had to vent,thanks for listening
Allison
&...
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allison
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6
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411
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Alanon Book Excerpt & Apology
(Preview)
Hi everyone. I have had my phone turned off, so I could not post the latest book excerpt for all of you. As soon as I am able I will post the excerpts. I previously worked with a manager who touched me inappropriately and then punched me when I made it clear I wanted nothing to do with him. The fear took over an...
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kissers
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4
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633
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Catching UP...
(Preview)
Lots of things have happened since my last post... I will try to summarize and yet keep it short..
My husband and I began counseling. The kids and I moved back home. He has stopped drinking, he goes alone and then we go together. Then a hurricane hit Florida, and we were impacted again.. ( just da...
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Tammy
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8
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311
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Time bomb
(Preview)
Hi
Last night it was like Mt Saint Helen errupted here. The pressures of the holidays and the financial problems here have been getting to both the bigger kids and me.
My husband was not present, in fact we did not even talk with him yesterday. There was a series of small incidents that set me off then...
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Jeannie
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11
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475
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Family Teen Meetings starting again
(Preview)
Hello all in Al-Anon,
Allot of you in Al-Anon have kids that need help just like all of us in Al-Anon do. Please direct them to the Family Teen Room for the new meetings to begin again on Sunday and Thursday at 8Pm EST. The meetings are designed around the Al-Anon meetings. The meet...
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John
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3
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404
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Speeding ticket.....
(Preview)
some more humor for my alanon friends. We can all use a laugh. It's an oldie but a goodie
The driver says, "Gee, officer I had it on cruise control at 60, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating."
Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: "Now don't be silly dear, you know that this car does...
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bobump
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6
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360
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Waiting for a change
(Preview)
My weekend was good. He hasn't drank in a couple of weeks but that doesn't mean he is easy to deal with. Since he doesn't drink he has a very good memory so if I do something wrong he will rember it an throw it back in my face. Which I try not to say anything. He is running out of things to talk about. I have done so...
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nycbt
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3
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351
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Happy Birthday John!!!!!
(Preview)
Enjoy your birthday John, take some time for yourself.
And a very special thank-you for having this board, this very special place, where miracles happen every day!
In recovery and with gratitude
Megan
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megan
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14
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592
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HP in action
(Preview)
My husband changed jobs two months ago after twelve years at the same company, the only job he ever had. He had two offers to choose from. One paid a little more than the other and the company had been around for close to 20 yrs. The other one was for a start up company that paid a little less and had only bee...
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pixel04
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1
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499
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I need a sponsor - at least temporarily
(Preview)
Is there someone with lots of Program in alanon who can sponsor me as I return to the program after 10 years away? I am looking for someone at a "live" meeting but could use some help over the next few days. And how do we even do that on here??? I'm new to this online stuff!
I would like a woman. I am a woman.
...
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mebjk
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2
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416
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its hard, but i will ALLOW my pain
(Preview)
allowing the pain
i had this VERY important lesson i would like to share.... i have a bad back..muscle spasms..turn the wrong way and i can feel it "tweak" and i am down for days....big knots, and pain its awful
well last night i "tweaked" my back AGAIN... in times before, i would curse my karma, cu...
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rosie light shines
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5
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515
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about me
(Preview)
I have a very hard time saying no. I get upset with my self for not saying no. I am how every getting better at it. For instance someone ask for me to type her paper for school and I said no in a nice way. I told her a good place to go. But if I start typing her paper it would go on for the whole time she had class. I sti...
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nycbt
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5
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334
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I feel powerless over my life and others too
(Preview)
I have been recently trying to figure out about my entire life, I have been trying to find reasons as to why my life has been so painful inspite of the fact that i have been blessed in many ways such as being alive ,having a daughter and family and friends who care so much about me. I have experienced pain and...
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hopeful
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2
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600
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trying to come back
(Preview)
Well, it has been quite a long time since I posted here. I guess that I, like my A thought I could do it on my own. Well, actually that is not true, I know that I cannot do it on my own, rather, I have just fallen back into my old self of not sharing and thinking things could just go on the way they are. So here I am ba...
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confused
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6
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582
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Emotionally trapped
(Preview)
I admit I am helpless - totally helpless. This is crazy to go the last two months of my life feeling this way every single morning. I cant stand waking up sick to my stomach every day anymore - the pain is so intense. I am dying inside my own emotional prison. I sleep because of sleeping...
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Cyn
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8
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676
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A question....
(Preview)
Hi All!
I have read in posts here of the "dry drunk" syndrome. Could someone please explain this to me. I have never heard this term before (maybe it's not a term commonly used here in Australia).
Thanks for the wonderful shares, I am learning so much!
Take C...
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Feather
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6
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343
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Saying the words I never wanted to say
(Preview)
Hello Roomies,
Well last night when I got home from work my "A" was not home. He had been home at some point and then left again. He did not come home last night at all. I really had wanted to go to a f2f, but I couldn't with the children. So I cleaned house, helped my 6 year old with her homework, played with t...
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Dolphin123
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6
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499
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Pure Love (I wrote a poem!)
(Preview)
Loving is so terrifying, makes everyone run and hide
When you can give a genuine love, most of us who are abused can't even tolerate it
Foreign it is to be accepted, adored, compassionately understood, empathathically embraced
When it is all any of us long for, just to be loved for ours...
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kitty
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3
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606
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nothing to say to her
(Preview)
The holidays are always a challenge, and this year is no different.
My father remains in the same fog he has been in since Thanksgiving. My mother has been on a rollercoaster of depression and anger ever since. I always waffle on what to do with the suicide threats from one or the other of them. It s...
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pixel04
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3
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614
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What to say at Holiday Time
(Preview)
I am seeking advice on how to handle a sister, who has been struggling with alcoholism for several years, at the holidays. Almost 2 years ago, after an intervention, my sister went to rehab and was sober for only a few months following. Things have gotten progressively worse again and now she has falle...
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LostDux
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6
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754
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Setting Boundaries..and having a difficult time saying no
(Preview)
Hello all...
Does this sound familiar the not being able to say no? and the difficulty of setting boundaries??
Yes this is what we are afraid of,or at least I am. I have soo much trouble saying no let it be something so little as not wanting to go to the store. I feel guilty every time I say no.w...
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Lauren ashley
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7
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372
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Too Much Rain - Song Lyrics
(Preview)
Hi Everyone,
I heard this song yesterday, and it just made me feel good, hopeful! Thought I would share the lyrics with you.
Laugh when your eyes are burnimg, Smile when your heart is filled with pain
Sigh as you brush away tomorrow, Make a vow, That it's not going t...
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david62
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2
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438
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Listening
(Preview)
I have been listening to a lot of people lately who give me different views on addicts and ACOAs and I am thankful. I feel like my HP is talking to me through them. Some of the things that people have told me (I'm writing them out because it makes me absorb them better that way):
1. He stopped...
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Cyn
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4
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559
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Understanding Alcoholism (some adult content)
(Preview)
I think I have a pretty good understanding of alcoholism. What I'm having trouble understanding is the "sober alcoholic," and I'm not to the point yet where I feel like I can trust my own instincts.
My boyfriend is 15 years sober, we've been seeing eachother for about 6 months. We have a...
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Jane Avril
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14
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733
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I read this every morning
(Preview)
A Prayer at the Beginning of the Day
O, Higher Power, allow me to greet the coming day in peace. Help me in all things to rely upon Your holy will, In every hour of the day, reveal Your will to me. Bless my dealings with all who surround me. Teach me to treat all that comes to me throughout the d...
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kitty
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4
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304
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I must remember Alcoholism is progressive....
(Preview)
I committed to God that I would not run away from my marraige. I promised him that I would follow what I beleive he has guided me to do. I shall ask for strength, guidance, and patience to make it through each progression of the disease.
I beleive with all my heart that God has a great...
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captcodee
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6
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409
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Should I take him back?
(Preview)
I am relatively new to this site. I've been tooling around the message boards and in the chat room the last several days. My husband is an alcoholic. I've never had that much of a problem dealing with it as I've been associated with one alcoholic or another my entire life. (My...
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marie_h
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8
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390
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What is compassion......
(Preview)
Someone shared with me today something along the lines that they felt that compassion was letting someone suffer the natural consequences of their actions, and to not do things for them that they should be doing themselves.
I liked that concept. I was curious to see what the dictionaries said.
...
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bobump
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4
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2621
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Need Alt Chair on Wednesdays
(Preview)
Due to an increasingly hectic schedule, I am no longer able to co-chair on Wednesday nights with my friend David. I apologize for the inconvenience, but I know that there are many members out there who are eager to provide service to the group. Thanks to one and all!
Cara ("Cabecka")
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cabecka
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1
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390
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