Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

a4l · a4l

Ok lovely family. I don't know how familiar this is so I'd like to put it out there for some help. I am at a stage now where I excitedly feel like I've reached the middle ground between all or nothing. And accordingly I want to try and put the pieces of my puzzle together. Because this is both new and old, I am a...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading from Courage to Change, the author shares that, since coming to AlAnon, they have become aware of choices that they never knew they had. The author now realizes that if the are uncomfortable with something, they don't necessarily HAVE to do it! Of course, the author ref...

Tammy · Tammy

Yesterday was Easter a day of Celebration for Christians however, I cried so much yesterday that today my eyes will barely open. You see, my husband walked out after 21 years together. He says he doesnt want to fight any more. Yet we werent fighting. He says that he is working on staying sober and I am...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I think I'm more tired today than I was yesterday we are done with the yearly trek until next year I hope. My X is absolutely in rare form and I am over it. I am trying to stay in my own hula hoop and mind my business I won't lie .. I did break out the bedazzled horns and adjusted them to make sure they still fit .....

a4l · a4l

For years I've been wanting two things: a massage and excercise. I've snuck in jogs here and there, did a lot of walking with the kids etc.

a4l · a4l

Good morning all! I have chosen to embark on a pathway to positivity. Choosing not to dwell on the past, not to always look at the half empty glass, but to focus on the positives and keep looking up. At the same time, to allow myself to remain positive, boundaries and good people around me are so very nec...

hotrod · hotrod

the ODAT reading for Tuesday 8-13 speaks about dwelling on the past. It suggests that by so doing, we are thereby reopening old wounds. The reading challenges us to slowly examine all that is troubling us today to determine if they have any true validity and suggests using alanon tools to help us...

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for Monday, 8/12, proposes that we can feel relief through the sense of surrender when we truly take the 3rd Step. To turn our will and our lives over to the care of God, we are accepting the limits of our own understanding. We will not always know what is best for other people and even oursel...

mamajo70 · mamajo70

Good evening, I am new here but not new to the program. I'm starting a new group in my town and looking for suggestions on a group name that is appealing and follows the guidelines set out. Thanks in advance for any suggestions!

Fedora · Fedora

I have two kids, 9 and 12. I have not had a discussion with them about AH's drinking. My counselor (whom I have not seen in over a year now as she was in a different location) told me that "children see and know all". While I don't doubt that, I have not found the guts to come out and talk to them about dad's beh...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about the unique support of alanon. Alcoholism is an isolating disease, so realizing that there is a place where people come together to share their stories is a comfort. There is a sentence on this page that describes the 12 steps as something which, when ta...

Lyne · Lyne

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.... Some days are really hard accepting my A...and today is one of those days, Lyne

texas yankee · texas yankee

I guess I'm one of those "fair weather friends" here, cause when things are going well for me (regarding my adult son), I'm pretty carefree - I've offered a few thoughts here to others dealing with stuff, and I go to FTF meetings, but I forgot that this Al Anon preparedness stuff is like exercise - if ya st...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am feeling so sick to my stomach! I have to learn that you don't mix certain things together one after the other! I need to practice more self-care. I am not doing things the a way I had been when I reached my goal weight. I had 30 or so lbs. to goal. It was so hard but I tried to use the program & my common se...

Freetime · Freetime

Has the author of today's page been spying on my life? Like me, they always felt they could not be their true self when around other people. Tried to be what others thought they should be, in fear that people would not accept them as they truly are. In Al-Anon they saw that many others shared the same prob...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP family! Better late than never.....Today's Courage to Change discusses Step Six. This step suggests our lives will undergo great change, and many of us fear nothing will be left if we shed our characteristics that helped us cope. Many have fear of the unknown, yet if we've worked...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I could not ask for a day like today w/o praising my God! I am so grateful. Ordinary fits on a day where there is no pressure! I thought the day would be so difficult because of the nature of my involvement on a particular study. The topic was anger. One of the 12steppers was of the group. It wasn't Al anon at a...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Today's reading in Courage to Change speaks about steps 10, 11, and 12. The author shares that they have often heard of these steps as "maintenance steps," but the author likes to think of them as growth steps- steps that let the author continue to challenge themself. The author tested the theory that...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Greetings all. Being of service, and posting the daily for tomorrow from Hotrod! The C2C reading for Tuesday, August 6 speaks about the feeling of being trapped in a burning building. It points out that ae stroing handis . Behind the flames and becons to me beckoning come through the dor. We kne...

a4l · a4l

I am really grateful today for all the love in my life. The alanon program I feel has been like taking a stroll with a wisdom beyond myself, where everything I've struggled with emotionally, mentally and spiritually, has been lovingly broken down for me, into easy to understand parts with practice ex...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Ok .. so as we ALL know as practicing parents .. this stuff is HARD. LOL!! One of the hardest not fun moments has been the whole letting go stuff. Letting go of gender expectation, letting go of enabling, letting go of the children I see as I watch them become struggling young adults (that's the hardes...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Well the first leg of the trip is done and we will do it again next week. We had such a good time. The kids are where they are suppose to be at the moment. Our trip out involved a trip to Lambert's if you are in the area it's a must go to. After having a great time there we went and met up with my friends and had su...

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for Monday, 8/5, talks about how resentment can poison all your waking hours. The author could hold resentments for days or years! Since alanon, the author can feel their feelings, but does not have to rehearse and review the list of grievances. The writer tries to use their energy for...

Lyne · Lyne

Hi MIP family-Lately I am doing well, happy, coping well, and of course there are ups and downs. Today I have learned that a former colleague and friend is in the hospital. He has pancreatic cancer and was doing well until a tick bite came along. His prognosis is quite guarded. And my 14 year old dogg...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about how many of us have learned not to express our anger, specifically to remain silent (and resentful) instead. The writer describes having grown up in a home with alcoholic parents and violence in the home. Learning that expressing anger equaled abuse...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

It just keeps better & better! My God & i are turning things for the better. I thought it couldn't get better but it has.

Lindie · Lindie

I want to take control of our finances, we are always behind because of AH drinking. We both work full time jobs. AH is the one who brings in the most money. I want to be able to get things caught up, some in savings and start saving for our future, but how can I do that without taking control of AH drinking? We...

hotrod · hotrod

Work.https://stepwork.activeboard.com/t65766784/alanon-step-8-8-1-2019/

Freetime · Freetime

Today's page in One Day At a Time in Al-Anon shows how much wisdom is condensed in the slogan Live and Let Live. The slogan tells us first to Live -- fully, richly, taking joy in what we do. The next part -- Let Live -- is more difficult because it calls on us to accept the right of all other human beings to liv...

Green Eyes · Green Eyes

Hi All! I just wanted to drop by here with an update. It's been awhile since I've checked in because I've been a bit busy! I got married last month to a wonderful man who is an amazing partner. We met online three and half years ago, neither of us with a plan to ever get married again. But you never know where...

DavidG · DavidG

~sigh~ I made this couple my mum and dad... I believed in them. Lois was most likely the better behaved. Bill had feet of clay... not angel's wings... but he rose from this... ... I visited their home once- in up-state New York... and had this tremendous sense of family. That I had sisters and brothe...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP - Happy August! Today's reading is primary about the three C's we learn in Al-Anon. We did not cause alcoholism, we can't control alcoholism and we can't cure it either. The writer, like so many came to Al-Anon to learn how to get a loved one to stop drinking. The writer had hopes tha...

Elabella · Elabella

Just a question on how you all deal with the lies and deception from the alcoholic? Im having a very hard time with it. For me its kind of a no brainer that if someone lies and is deceitful with you, then theres really no true relationship, especially in a marriage. How do you continue to be in a marriage whe...

Lindie · Lindie

My AH is changing shifts at work , so now I am going to be around AH more on the weekends. When he worked nights, he would be up until 1pm and get up at 8pm. Now he is going to be up from 3pm until 1 am most likely. I go to bed at 9pm. So there is going to be constant 6hrs around him and the drinking. What am I going to d...

WendyP · WendyP

Hi, it's Wendy P. I wanted to share about something that happened to me yesterday, and on thinking about it all, I am still amazed at "God's Timing". Even after many years in Alanon, it still can amaze me. On Monday Mornings, I go up town to do my normal Shopping, because I am a planner, had it all worked ou...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I'm in process of trying to keep my mouth shut. I am feeling my oats so to speak so therefore have a tendency to speak way more bluntly than necessary. It's a character defect and I am aware of it. Some of it could be the anxiety of the trip. While we planned it out the money is going to be tight to get the ki...

lookingup · lookingup

hi everyone, im bringing this topic up in hopes i can hear whats helped others in dealing with foo. i did separate myself for a very long time,so that i could heal, im finding that when i talk with foo,i seem to get sucked in like a vaccume, negative talk ,etc,all that goes with being raised in a A home ,no re...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! I today's reading in Courage to Change the author speaks about a source of friction that had always existed between the author and their alcoholic loved one: housekeeping. The author shares that they are usually so overwhelmed by all the things that need to be done, that they cannot get org...

hotrod · hotrod

Thee C2C reading for Tuesday, July30, my birthday speaks about finding " happiness". The reading suggests that happiness is an 'inside job'and that we cannot be happy all the time but if we are willing to break old habits and work hard to achieve our goal we can change our negative attitudes....

Lindie · Lindie

I went to my first face2face and left with more questions and left feeling more alone. Do you have to ask for a sponsor, or wait until someone offers to be a sponser? I am going to try another meeting with other people there but that is my question about how to get a sponsor?

DavidG · DavidG

Howdy y'all, kia ora koutou... Went to my nearest f2f group last night and there were 11 there! last week, there were three of us... This group has a wide catchment of readers- from all over the world. And we do get good quality Alanon here- because of the love and peace of the programme- and because w...

canadianguy · canadianguy

Reposting this from my files - still seems pretty appropriate today & always, and hope this can be a positive for some of the members..... T There seem to be a lot of posts these days looking for some clarity around what Al-Anon is, and what it is not.... The first segment (in italics) is taken...

Lindie · Lindie

I went to my first alanon meeting this morning and left disappointed. So was just wondering, if there might be another meeting that will be a good fit for myself. I didnt know what to expect at a meeting, but I did expect something more than welcome. I am not wanting to bash Alanon so that is not my intentio...

Elabella · Elabella

Hi- Im really hoping to hear from any of you that have stayed married to the active alcoholic in your lives. How do you do it? Is your marriage normal? By that I mean are you intimate? Can you have a loving, close relationship with the alcoholic? If you have stayed, was it because of the AlAnon program? I j...

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for Monday, 7/29, suggests finding a suitable Higher Power. Suggestions are given for finding a power greater than ourselves, that we can come to rely upon. These suggestions include: God, good orderly direction, Allah, or the universe. The author says that after Step 2, the rest o...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Just having memories of my lifetime. I have been married for 20 years been in the program 33 years & have lived 53 years as of yesterday!But it is all one day at a time! You can plan for the future but not plan the outcome! Not much else to say but the miracles still keep on coming! There is nothing bette...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about all that we can learn from one another in the program, specifically a sponsor/sponsee relationship. The writer describes a young teenager who is unable to find Alateen meetings in her area, so is permitted to attend Alanon meetings. Over time she as...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

Hi Everyone, I could use some support and encouragement as I begin a new job. I have been doing contract work with one employer for some time now but they have lost many projects and there are less opportunities for work. I have been in touch with a recruiter who had connected me with another employer som...

Elabella · Elabella

Hi all, So first off I wanted to ask all of you what you think about us AlAnon folksgoing to open AA meetings by ourselves? I e gone to two already. Last night I went and literally cried from happiness seeing all these wonderful souls fighting for their sobriety and living the best life they can. It made m...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am on a roller coaster right now. It is even affecting my sleep! My ah is acting out. I guess it is all about him. He us a recovering alcoholic but he is mean then nice. He is not facing something that is making him accusatory & flat out bullying me. I am trying not to react but it is hard. He is pushing me &...

Freetime · Freetime

This is a powerful page! The author realizes that life was unmanageable -- not because of facts but because of illusions. Eventually they listened to a suggestion that helped them see the light: The idea that we can control another person is an illusion. Life is better when we let go and let God. Th...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Has anyone ever celebrated their birthday for a month? I am an example of over a week. I have been celebrating sober for the longest time! IT is so nice that so many people want to be w/ me at all except my total family! I guess I am worth it; I just am open to any kind of celebrating. I have to say that even the ov...

MelissaK · MelissaK

Hi guys. A while ago I was a member of this board, and I used the al-anon wisdom I gained to leave an abusive relationship. That was a good thing; this board and the transformitive wisdom I received saved my life, and my child's life too. Unfortunately I didn't do very well myself; once I was free and clear...

Carla61 · Carla61

I know he has a disease, but the anger, mean behavior. It's so hard not to hate this person! He says he no longer loves me, hates me, yada, yada I just want to scream!!

lookingup · lookingup

hi again, just wondered if any one here has had any experience with loved one with tbi,traumatic brain injury my sister was in a bad wreck yrs ago 2014,i think. they came to me the dr,at the time we werent on speaking terms,drugs related reasons. she had emergengy surgery done on her neck due to broken al...

hotrod · hotrod

TheeODATC reading for Tuesday, July 22 speaks about attempting to understand the disease of alcoholism because we think it will help us to better cope with the problem.The reading suggests understanding the disease is not going to help us respond in a different fashion- we need to study the Al-An...

Lindie · Lindie

Here is my situation. I have been married for 30 years, 25 out of those my husband has been an alcoholic. AH will not seek counseling, due to his childhood traumas, he is trying to fix himself by not seeking counseling by self medicating with beer. AH works nights so there is nothing for him to do on his nig...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Posting early for tomorrow as we have a super early tee time! Tomorrow's reading talks about doormat status, recovery and courage! The author suggests they arrived @ Al-Anon with a history of letting others take advantage and quite a collection of anger, resentments and guilt. The author often...

Elabella · Elabella

Oh my goodness, the last few days I've been on a tear setting boundaries. Today however I'm struggling. My AH just texted and called me from work asking if I could go to the beer store for him. He is working very late, and all beer stores will be closed by the time he is done. He cannot leave work. He has to be t...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! Today's reading from C2C is about step 11 (Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood him, praying for the knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry that out.) The author shares that, for them, doing God's will means that, at a...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	ESH on boundaries. (Preview) Ok lovely family. I don't know how familiar this is so I'd like to put it out there for some help. I am at a stage now where I excitedly feel like I've reached the middle ground between all or nothing. And accordingly I want to try and put the pieces of my puzzle together. Because this is both new and old, I am a...	a4l	7	4689	Aug 16, 2019 by a4l
	Courage to Change August 14 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading from Courage to Change, the author shares that, since coming to AlAnon, they have become aware of choices that they never knew they had. The author now realizes that if the are uncomfortable with something, they don't necessarily HAVE to do it! Of course, the author ref...	Skorpi	5	4314	Aug 15, 2019 by bud
	The end of a 21 year relationship with an "a" (Preview) Yesterday was Easter a day of Celebration for Christians however, I cried so much yesterday that today my eyes will barely open. You see, my husband walked out after 21 years together. He says he doesnt want to fight any more. Yet we werent fighting. He says that he is working on staying sober and I am...	Tammy	9	2180	Aug 14, 2019 by bud
	i'm sooo tired .. (Preview) I think I'm more tired today than I was yesterday we are done with the yearly trek until next year I hope. My X is absolutely in rare form and I am over it. I am trying to stay in my own hula hoop and mind my business I won't lie .. I did break out the bedazzled horns and adjusted them to make sure they still fit .....	SerenityRUS	6	3658	Aug 13, 2019 by andromeda
	Did something for me :-) (Preview) For years I've been wanting two things: a massage and excercise. I've snuck in jogs here and there, did a lot of walking with the kids etc.	a4l	7	3355	Aug 13, 2019 by a4l
	Still human still capable of biting. (Preview) Good morning all! I have chosen to embark on a pathway to positivity. Choosing not to dwell on the past, not to always look at the half empty glass, but to focus on the positives and keep looking up. At the same time, to allow myself to remain positive, boundaries and good people around me are so very nec...	a4l	9	4517	Aug 13, 2019 by Choriste
	ODAT Reading 8-13 (Preview) the ODAT reading for Tuesday 8-13 speaks about dwelling on the past. It suggests that by so doing, we are thereby reopening old wounds. The reading challenges us to slowly examine all that is troubling us today to determine if they have any true validity and suggests using alanon tools to help us...	hotrod	5	823	Aug 13, 2019 by bud
	C2C, 8/12 (Preview) The reading for Monday, 8/12, proposes that we can feel relief through the sense of surrender when we truly take the 3rd Step. To turn our will and our lives over to the care of God, we are accepting the limits of our own understanding. We will not always know what is best for other people and even oursel...	Lyne	5	2149	Aug 12, 2019 by bud
	Group Name (Preview) Good evening, I am new here but not new to the program. I'm starting a new group in my town and looking for suggestions on a group name that is appealing and follows the guidelines set out. Thanks in advance for any suggestions!	mamajo70	4	2866	Aug 12, 2019 by Iamhere
	How much to tell children? (Preview) I have two kids, 9 and 12. I have not had a discussion with them about AH's drinking. My counselor (whom I have not seen in over a year now as she was in a different location) told me that "children see and know all". While I don't doubt that, I have not found the guts to come out and talk to them about dad's beh...	Fedora	10	2040	Aug 12, 2019 by SerenityRUS
	Hope for Today Aug 11 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about the unique support of alanon. Alcoholism is an isolating disease, so realizing that there is a place where people come together to share their stories is a comfort. There is a sentence on this page that describes the 12 steps as something which, when ta...	yanksfan51	4	1798	Aug 11, 2019 by PosiesandPuppies
	God grant me.... (Preview) God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.... Some days are really hard accepting my A...and today is one of those days, Lyne	Lyne	5	3899	Aug 11, 2019 by hotrod
	Out of the blue . . . . (Preview) I guess I'm one of those "fair weather friends" here, cause when things are going well for me (regarding my adult son), I'm pretty carefree - I've offered a few thoughts here to others dealing with stuff, and I go to FTF meetings, but I forgot that this Al Anon preparedness stuff is like exercise - if ya st...	texas yankee	14	4879	Aug 10, 2019 by bud
	I feel so sick! (Preview) I am feeling so sick to my stomach! I have to learn that you don't mix certain things together one after the other! I need to practice more self-care. I am not doing things the a way I had been when I reached my goal weight. I had 30 or so lbs. to goal. It was so hard but I tried to use the program & my common se...	Hoot Nanny	5	2421	Aug 10, 2019 by hotrod
	C2C, August 9 -- Being Myself (Preview) Has the author of today's page been spying on my life? Like me, they always felt they could not be their true self when around other people. Tried to be what others thought they should be, in fear that people would not accept them as they truly are. In Al-Anon they saw that many others shared the same prob...	Freetime	7	519	Aug 9, 2019 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change 8/8 (Preview) Good morning MIP family! Better late than never.....Today's Courage to Change discusses Step Six. This step suggests our lives will undergo great change, and many of us fear nothing will be left if we shed our characteristics that helped us cope. Many have fear of the unknown, yet if we've worked...	Iamhere	2	1791	Aug 9, 2019 by Lyne
	update just an ordinary day! (Preview) I could not ask for a day like today w/o praising my God! I am so grateful. Ordinary fits on a day where there is no pressure! I thought the day would be so difficult because of the nature of my involvement on a particular study. The topic was anger. One of the 12steppers was of the group. It wasn't Al anon at a...	Hoot Nanny	2	2149	Aug 8, 2019 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change August 7 (Preview) Today's reading in Courage to Change speaks about steps 10, 11, and 12. The author shares that they have often heard of these steps as "maintenance steps," but the author likes to think of them as growth steps- steps that let the author continue to challenge themself. The author tested the theory that...	Skorpi	4	1301	Aug 7, 2019 by El
	From HotRod - Courage to Change 8/6 (Preview) Greetings all. Being of service, and posting the daily for tomorrow from Hotrod! The C2C reading for Tuesday, August 6 speaks about the feeling of being trapped in a burning building. It points out that ae stroing handis . Behind the flames and becons to me beckoning come through the dor. We kne...	Iamhere	2	2536	Aug 6, 2019 by Iamhere
	A gratitude share. (Preview) I am really grateful today for all the love in my life. The alanon program I feel has been like taking a stroll with a wisdom beyond myself, where everything I've struggled with emotionally, mentally and spiritually, has been lovingly broken down for me, into easy to understand parts with practice ex...	a4l	2	1435	Aug 6, 2019 by PosiesandPuppies
	Parenting .. (Preview) Ok .. so as we ALL know as practicing parents .. this stuff is HARD. LOL!! One of the hardest not fun moments has been the whole letting go stuff. Letting go of gender expectation, letting go of enabling, letting go of the children I see as I watch them become struggling young adults (that's the hardes...	SerenityRUS	0	3068	Aug 5, 2019 by SerenityRUS
	We made it ... LOL (Preview) Well the first leg of the trip is done and we will do it again next week. We had such a good time. The kids are where they are suppose to be at the moment. Our trip out involved a trip to Lambert's if you are in the area it's a must go to. After having a great time there we went and met up with my friends and had su...	SerenityRUS	5	4028	Aug 5, 2019 by SerenityRUS
	C2C, 8/5 (Preview) The reading for Monday, 8/5, talks about how resentment can poison all your waking hours. The author could hold resentments for days or years! Since alanon, the author can feel their feelings, but does not have to rehearse and review the list of grievances. The writer tries to use their energy for...	Lyne	4	490	Aug 5, 2019 by a4l
	Sadness amongst happiness (Preview) Hi MIP family-Lately I am doing well, happy, coping well, and of course there are ups and downs. Today I have learned that a former colleague and friend is in the hospital. He has pancreatic cancer and was doing well until a tick bite came along. His prognosis is quite guarded. And my 14 year old dogg...	Lyne	5	2264	Aug 5, 2019 by PosiesandPuppies
	Hope for Today Aug 4 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about how many of us have learned not to express our anger, specifically to remain silent (and resentful) instead. The writer describes having grown up in a home with alcoholic parents and violence in the home. Learning that expressing anger equaled abuse...	yanksfan51	6	571	Aug 4, 2019 by a4l
	Awful beautiful life. (Preview) It just keeps better & better! My God & i are turning things for the better. I thought it couldn't get better but it has.	Hoot Nanny	6	3408	Aug 4, 2019 by Hoot Nanny
	How do you gain control with out controlling the alcoholic? (Preview) I want to take control of our finances, we are always behind because of AH drinking. We both work full time jobs. AH is the one who brings in the most money. I want to be able to get things caught up, some in savings and start saving for our future, but how can I do that without taking control of AH drinking? We...	Lindie	11	4663	Aug 4, 2019 by tiredtonite
	Step 8 posted to Step Board please join in and share yourESH (Preview) Work.https://stepwork.activeboard.com/t65766784/alanon-step-8-8-1-2019/	hotrod	2	2406	Aug 3, 2019 by Lyne
	ODAT, August 2 - Live and Let Live (Preview) Today's page in One Day At a Time in Al-Anon shows how much wisdom is condensed in the slogan Live and Let Live. The slogan tells us first to Live -- fully, richly, taking joy in what we do. The next part -- Let Live -- is more difficult because it calls on us to accept the right of all other human beings to liv...	Freetime	5	3883	Aug 2, 2019 by DavidG
	My Miracle in Progress- An Update (Preview) Hi All! I just wanted to drop by here with an update. It's been awhile since I've checked in because I've been a bit busy! I got married last month to a wonderful man who is an amazing partner. We met online three and half years ago, neither of us with a plan to ever get married again. But you never know where...	Green Eyes	4	1910	Aug 2, 2019 by Iamhere
	A Love Story... (Preview) ~sigh~ I made this couple my mum and dad... I believed in them. Lois was most likely the better behaved. Bill had feet of clay... not angel's wings... but he rose from this... ... I visited their home once- in up-state New York... and had this tremendous sense of family. That I had sisters and brothe...	DavidG	6	3227	Aug 1, 2019 by DavidG
	Courage to Change 8/1/19 (Preview) Good morning MIP - Happy August! Today's reading is primary about the three C's we learn in Al-Anon. We did not cause alcoholism, we can't control alcoholism and we can't cure it either. The writer, like so many came to Al-Anon to learn how to get a loved one to stop drinking. The writer had hopes tha...	Iamhere	2	2986	Aug 1, 2019 by Lyne
	Lies & Deception.... (Preview) Just a question on how you all deal with the lies and deception from the alcoholic? Im having a very hard time with it. For me its kind of a no brainer that if someone lies and is deceitful with you, then theres really no true relationship, especially in a marriage. How do you continue to be in a marriage whe...	Elabella	16	3969	Aug 1, 2019 by 2HP
	I need to find the strength (Preview) My AH is changing shifts at work , so now I am going to be around AH more on the weekends. When he worked nights, he would be up until 1pm and get up at 8pm. Now he is going to be up from 3pm until 1 am most likely. I go to bed at 9pm. So there is going to be constant 6hrs around him and the drinking. What am I going to d...	Lindie	8	1888	Aug 1, 2019 by Iamhere
	God's Timing (Preview) Hi, it's Wendy P. I wanted to share about something that happened to me yesterday, and on thinking about it all, I am still amazed at "God's Timing". Even after many years in Alanon, it still can amaze me. On Monday Mornings, I go up town to do my normal Shopping, because I am a planner, had it all worked ou...	WendyP	8	762	Jul 31, 2019 by WendyP
	Trying to keep my mouth shut (Preview) I'm in process of trying to keep my mouth shut. I am feeling my oats so to speak so therefore have a tendency to speak way more bluntly than necessary. It's a character defect and I am aware of it. Some of it could be the anxiety of the trip. While we planned it out the money is going to be tight to get the ki...	SerenityRUS	6	892	Jul 31, 2019 by Iamhere
	FOO (Preview) hi everyone, im bringing this topic up in hopes i can hear whats helped others in dealing with foo. i did separate myself for a very long time,so that i could heal, im finding that when i talk with foo,i seem to get sucked in like a vaccume, negative talk ,etc,all that goes with being raised in a A home ,no re...	lookingup	4	1069	Jul 31, 2019 by lookingup
	Courage to Change July 31 (Preview) Hello MIP! I today's reading in Courage to Change the author speaks about a source of friction that had always existed between the author and their alcoholic loved one: housekeeping. The author shares that they are usually so overwhelmed by all the things that need to be done, that they cannot get org...	Skorpi	4	1881	Jul 31, 2019 by El
	C2C reading Tuesday 7-30 (Preview) Thee C2C reading for Tuesday, July30, my birthday speaks about finding " happiness". The reading suggests that happiness is an 'inside job'and that we cannot be happy all the time but if we are willing to break old habits and work hard to achieve our goal we can change our negative attitudes....	hotrod	8	563	Jul 31, 2019 by bud
	How do you find a sponser? (Preview) I went to my first face2face and left with more questions and left feeling more alone. Do you have to ask for a sponsor, or wait until someone offers to be a sponser? I am going to try another meeting with other people there but that is my question about how to get a sponsor?	Lindie	3	1820	Jul 30, 2019 by Lindie
	Our HP works in mysterious ways...??? (Preview) Howdy y'all, kia ora koutou... Went to my nearest f2f group last night and there were 11 there! last week, there were three of us... This group has a wide catchment of readers- from all over the world. And we do get good quality Alanon here- because of the love and peace of the programme- and because w...	DavidG	3	1789	Jul 30, 2019 by DavidG
	What is Al-Anon? What is Al-Anon NOT? (Preview) Reposting this from my files - still seems pretty appropriate today & always, and hope this can be a positive for some of the members..... T There seem to be a lot of posts these days looking for some clarity around what Al-Anon is, and what it is not.... The first segment (in italics) is taken...	canadianguy	13	5147	Jul 30, 2019 by Aloha
	Are All Alanon Meetings The Same? (Preview) I went to my first alanon meeting this morning and left disappointed. So was just wondering, if there might be another meeting that will be a good fit for myself. I didnt know what to expect at a meeting, but I did expect something more than welcome. I am not wanting to bash Alanon so that is not my intentio...	Lindie	5	1753	Jul 30, 2019 by Aloha
	Any people out there who stayed married to an active alcoholic? (Preview) Hi- Im really hoping to hear from any of you that have stayed married to the active alcoholic in your lives. How do you do it? Is your marriage normal? By that I mean are you intimate? Can you have a loving, close relationship with the alcoholic? If you have stayed, was it because of the AlAnon program? I j...	Elabella	23	5072	Jul 29, 2019 by a4l
	C2C, 7/29 (Preview) The reading for Monday, 7/29, suggests finding a suitable Higher Power. Suggestions are given for finding a power greater than ourselves, that we can come to rely upon. These suggestions include: God, good orderly direction, Allah, or the universe. The author says that after Step 2, the rest o...	Lyne	3	2107	Jul 29, 2019 by Iamhere
	20 years 33 years & 53 years one day at a time! (Preview) Just having memories of my lifetime. I have been married for 20 years been in the program 33 years & have lived 53 years as of yesterday!But it is all one day at a time! You can plan for the future but not plan the outcome! Not much else to say but the miracles still keep on coming! There is nothing bette...	Hoot Nanny	3	3031	Jul 29, 2019 by PosiesandPuppies
	Hope for Today July 28 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about all that we can learn from one another in the program, specifically a sponsor/sponsee relationship. The writer describes a young teenager who is unable to find Alateen meetings in her area, so is permitted to attend Alanon meetings. Over time she as...	yanksfan51	4	1124	Jul 28, 2019 by Iamhere
	Confidence Shaky with New Job (Preview) Hi Everyone, I could use some support and encouragement as I begin a new job. I have been doing contract work with one employer for some time now but they have lost many projects and there are less opportunities for work. I have been in touch with a recruiter who had connected me with another employer som...	tiredtonite	15	4600	Jul 27, 2019 by tiredtonite
	went fo another AA meeting alone.... (Preview) Hi all, So first off I wanted to ask all of you what you think about us AlAnon folksgoing to open AA meetings by ourselves? I e gone to two already. Last night I went and literally cried from happiness seeing all these wonderful souls fighting for their sobriety and living the best life they can. It made m...	Elabella	12	3596	Jul 27, 2019 by Jen61
	Mean then nice! (Preview) I am on a roller coaster right now. It is even affecting my sleep! My ah is acting out. I guess it is all about him. He us a recovering alcoholic but he is mean then nice. He is not facing something that is making him accusatory & flat out bullying me. I am trying not to react but it is hard. He is pushing me &...	Hoot Nanny	9	838	Jul 27, 2019 by lookingup
	C2C, July 25 - Illusions (Preview) This is a powerful page! The author realizes that life was unmanageable -- not because of facts but because of illusions. Eventually they listened to a suggestion that helped them see the light: The idea that we can control another person is an illusion. Life is better when we let go and let God. Th...	Freetime	6	1629	Jul 27, 2019 by lookingup
	does anyone celebrate? (Preview) Has anyone ever celebrated their birthday for a month? I am an example of over a week. I have been celebrating sober for the longest time! IT is so nice that so many people want to be w/ me at all except my total family! I guess I am worth it; I just am open to any kind of celebrating. I have to say that even the ov...	Hoot Nanny	4	425	Jul 27, 2019 by lookingup
	Lost ring and stuff (Preview) Hi guys. A while ago I was a member of this board, and I used the al-anon wisdom I gained to leave an abusive relationship. That was a good thing; this board and the transformitive wisdom I received saved my life, and my child's life too. Unfortunately I didn't do very well myself; once I was free and clear...	MelissaK	16	559	Jul 27, 2019 by Temple
	So hard to differentiate between the disease (Preview) I know he has a disease, but the anger, mean behavior. It's so hard not to hate this person! He says he no longer loves me, hates me, yada, yada I just want to scream!!	Carla61	5	1856	Jul 26, 2019 by bud
	reaching out (Preview) hi again, just wondered if any one here has had any experience with loved one with tbi,traumatic brain injury my sister was in a bad wreck yrs ago 2014,i think. they came to me the dr,at the time we werent on speaking terms,drugs related reasons. she had emergengy surgery done on her neck due to broken al...	lookingup	11	1994	Jul 25, 2019 by lookingup
	ODAT reading 7-23 (Preview) TheeODATC reading for Tuesday, July 22 speaks about attempting to understand the disease of alcoholism because we think it will help us to better cope with the problem.The reading suggests understanding the disease is not going to help us respond in a different fashion- we need to study the Al-An...	hotrod	4	4227	Jul 25, 2019 by Aloha
	Need to let go of the fear (Preview) Here is my situation. I have been married for 30 years, 25 out of those my husband has been an alcoholic. AH will not seek counseling, due to his childhood traumas, he is trying to fix himself by not seeking counseling by self medicating with beer. AH works nights so there is nothing for him to do on his nig...	Lindie	7	594	Jul 25, 2019 by Lindie
	Courage to Change 7/24/19 (Preview) Posting early for tomorrow as we have a super early tee time! Tomorrow's reading talks about doormat status, recovery and courage! The author suggests they arrived @ Al-Anon with a history of letting others take advantage and quite a collection of anger, resentments and guilt. The author often...	Iamhere	2	620	Jul 25, 2019 by hotrod
	HELP WITH BOUNDARIES.. (Preview) Oh my goodness, the last few days I've been on a tear setting boundaries. Today however I'm struggling. My AH just texted and called me from work asking if I could go to the beer store for him. He is working very late, and all beer stores will be closed by the time he is done. He cannot leave work. He has to be t...	Elabella	19	3318	Jul 24, 2019 by Bo
	Courage to Change July 24 (Preview) Hello MIP! Today's reading from C2C is about step 11 (Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood him, praying for the knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry that out.) The author shares that, for them, doing God's will means that, at a...	Skorpi	4	552	Jul 24, 2019 by Iamhere
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.