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Courage to Change August 7
(Preview)
Today's reading in Courage to Change speaks about steps 10, 11, and 12. The author shares that they have often heard of these steps as "maintenance steps," but the author likes to think of them as growth steps- steps that let the author continue to challenge themself. The author tested the theory that...
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Skorpi
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4
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1258
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From HotRod - Courage to Change 8/6
(Preview)
Greetings all. Being of service, and posting the daily for tomorrow from Hotrod! The C2C reading for Tuesday, August 6 speaks about the feeling of being trapped in a burning building. It points out that ae stroing handis . Behind the flames and becons to me beckoning come through the dor. We kne...
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Iamhere
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2
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2290
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A gratitude share.
(Preview)
I am really grateful today for all the love in my life. The alanon program I feel has been like taking a stroll with a wisdom beyond myself, where everything I've struggled with emotionally, mentally and spiritually, has been lovingly broken down for me, into easy to understand parts with practice ex...
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a4l
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2
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1290
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Parenting ..
(Preview)
Ok .. so as we ALL know as practicing parents .. this stuff is HARD. LOL!! One of the hardest not fun moments has been the whole letting go stuff. Letting go of gender expectation, letting go of enabling, letting go of the children I see as I watch them become struggling young adults (that's the hardes...
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SerenityRUS
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0
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2786
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We made it ... LOL
(Preview)
Well the first leg of the trip is done and we will do it again next week. We had such a good time. The kids are where they are suppose to be at the moment. Our trip out involved a trip to Lambert's if you are in the area it's a must go to. After having a great time there we went and met up with my friends and had su...
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SerenityRUS
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5
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3785
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C2C, 8/5
(Preview)
The reading for Monday, 8/5, talks about how resentment can poison all your waking hours. The author could hold resentments for days or years! Since alanon, the author can feel their feelings, but does not have to rehearse and review the list of grievances. The writer tries to use their energy for...
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Lyne
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4
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437
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Sadness amongst happiness
(Preview)
Hi MIP family-Lately I am doing well, happy, coping well, and of course there are ups and downs. Today I have learned that a former colleague and friend is in the hospital. He has pancreatic cancer and was doing well until a tick bite came along. His prognosis is quite guarded. And my 14 year old dogg...
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Lyne
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5
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2149
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Hope for Today Aug 4
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about how many of us have learned not to express our anger, specifically to remain silent (and resentful) instead. The writer describes having grown up in a home with alcoholic parents and violence in the home. Learning that expressing anger equaled abuse...
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yanksfan51
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6
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531
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Awful beautiful life.
(Preview)
It just keeps better & better! My God & i are turning things for the better. I thought it couldn't get better but it has.
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Hoot Nanny
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6
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3203
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How do you gain control with out controlling the alcoholic?
(Preview)
I want to take control of our finances, we are always behind because of AH drinking. We both work full time jobs. AH is the one who brings in the most money. I want to be able to get things caught up, some in savings and start saving for our future, but how can I do that without taking control of AH drinking? We...
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Lindie
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11
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Step 8 posted to Step Board please join in and share yourESH
(Preview)
Work.https://stepwork.activeboard.com/t65766784/alanon-step-8-8-1-2019/
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hotrod
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2
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2217
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ODAT, August 2 - Live and Let Live
(Preview)
Today's page in One Day At a Time in Al-Anon shows how much wisdom is condensed in the slogan Live and Let Live. The slogan tells us first to Live -- fully, richly, taking joy in what we do. The next part -- Let Live -- is more difficult because it calls on us to accept the right of all other human beings to liv...
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Freetime
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5
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3625
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My Miracle in Progress- An Update
(Preview)
Hi All! I just wanted to drop by here with an update. It's been awhile since I've checked in because I've been a bit busy! I got married last month to a wonderful man who is an amazing partner. We met online three and half years ago, neither of us with a plan to ever get married again. But you never know where...
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Green Eyes
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4
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1760
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A Love Story...
(Preview)
~sigh~ I made this couple my mum and dad... I believed in them. Lois was most likely the better behaved. Bill had feet of clay... not angel's wings... but he rose from this... ... I visited their home once- in up-state New York... and had this tremendous sense of family. That I had sisters and brothe...
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DavidG
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6
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2949
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Courage to Change 8/1/19
(Preview)
Good morning MIP - Happy August! Today's reading is primary about the three C's we learn in Al-Anon. We did not cause alcoholism, we can't control alcoholism and we can't cure it either. The writer, like so many came to Al-Anon to learn how to get a loved one to stop drinking. The writer had hopes tha...
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Iamhere
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2
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2722
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Lies & Deception....
(Preview)
Just a question on how you all deal with the lies and deception from the alcoholic? Im having a very hard time with it. For me its kind of a no brainer that if someone lies and is deceitful with you, then theres really no true relationship, especially in a marriage. How do you continue to be in a marriage whe...
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Elabella
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16
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3733
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I need to find the strength
(Preview)
My AH is changing shifts at work , so now I am going to be around AH more on the weekends. When he worked nights, he would be up until 1pm and get up at 8pm. Now he is going to be up from 3pm until 1 am most likely. I go to bed at 9pm. So there is going to be constant 6hrs around him and the drinking. What am I going to d...
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Lindie
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8
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1734
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God's Timing
(Preview)
Hi, it's Wendy P. I wanted to share about something that happened to me yesterday, and on thinking about it all, I am still amazed at "God's Timing". Even after many years in Alanon, it still can amaze me. On Monday Mornings, I go up town to do my normal Shopping, because I am a planner, had it all worked ou...
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WendyP
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8
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727
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Trying to keep my mouth shut
(Preview)
I'm in process of trying to keep my mouth shut. I am feeling my oats so to speak so therefore have a tendency to speak way more bluntly than necessary. It's a character defect and I am aware of it. Some of it could be the anxiety of the trip. While we planned it out the money is going to be tight to get the ki...
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SerenityRUS
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6
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835
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FOO
(Preview)
hi everyone, im bringing this topic up in hopes i can hear whats helped others in dealing with foo. i did separate myself for a very long time,so that i could heal, im finding that when i talk with foo,i seem to get sucked in like a vaccume, negative talk ,etc,all that goes with being raised in a A home ,no re...
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lookingup
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4
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1026
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Courage to Change July 31
(Preview)
Hello MIP! I today's reading in Courage to Change the author speaks about a source of friction that had always existed between the author and their alcoholic loved one: housekeeping. The author shares that they are usually so overwhelmed by all the things that need to be done, that they cannot get org...
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Skorpi
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4
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1769
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C2C reading Tuesday 7-30
(Preview)
Thee C2C reading for Tuesday, July30, my birthday speaks about finding " happiness". The reading suggests that happiness is an 'inside job'and that we cannot be happy all the time but if we are willing to break old habits and work hard to achieve our goal we can change our negative attitudes....
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hotrod
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8
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519
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How do you find a sponser?
(Preview)
I went to my first face2face and left with more questions and left feeling more alone. Do you have to ask for a sponsor, or wait until someone offers to be a sponser? I am going to try another meeting with other people there but that is my question about how to get a sponsor?
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Lindie
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3
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1674
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Our HP works in mysterious ways...???
(Preview)
Howdy y'all, kia ora koutou... Went to my nearest f2f group last night and there were 11 there! last week, there were three of us... This group has a wide catchment of readers- from all over the world. And we do get good quality Alanon here- because of the love and peace of the programme- and because w...
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DavidG
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3
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1642
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What is Al-Anon? What is Al-Anon NOT?
(Preview)
Reposting this from my files - still seems pretty appropriate today & always, and hope this can be a positive for some of the members..... T There seem to be a lot of posts these days looking for some clarity around what Al-Anon is, and what it is not.... The first segment (in italics) is taken...
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canadianguy
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13
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4713
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Are All Alanon Meetings The Same?
(Preview)
I went to my first alanon meeting this morning and left disappointed. So was just wondering, if there might be another meeting that will be a good fit for myself. I didnt know what to expect at a meeting, but I did expect something more than welcome. I am not wanting to bash Alanon so that is not my intentio...
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Lindie
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5
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1592
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Any people out there who stayed married to an active alcoholic?
(Preview)
Hi-
Im really hoping to hear from any of you that have stayed married to the active alcoholic in your lives. How do you do it? Is your marriage normal? By that I mean are you intimate? Can you have a loving, close relationship with the alcoholic? If you have stayed, was it because of the AlAnon program? I j...
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Elabella
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23
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4719
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C2C, 7/29
(Preview)
The reading for Monday, 7/29, suggests finding a suitable Higher Power. Suggestions are given for finding a power greater than ourselves, that we can come to rely upon. These suggestions include: God, good orderly direction, Allah, or the universe. The author says that after Step 2, the rest o...
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Lyne
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3
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1923
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20 years 33 years & 53 years one day at a time!
(Preview)
Just having memories of my lifetime. I have been married for 20 years been in the program 33 years & have lived 53 years as of yesterday!But it is all one day at a time! You can plan for the future but not plan the outcome! Not much else to say but the miracles still keep on coming! There is nothing bette...
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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2746
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Hope for Today July 28
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about all that we can learn from one another in the program, specifically a sponsor/sponsee relationship. The writer describes a young teenager who is unable to find Alateen meetings in her area, so is permitted to attend Alanon meetings. Over time she as...
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yanksfan51
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4
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1084
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Confidence Shaky with New Job
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, I could use some support and encouragement as I begin a new job. I have been doing contract work with one employer for some time now but they have lost many projects and there are less opportunities for work. I have been in touch with a recruiter who had connected me with another employer som...
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tiredtonite
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15
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4243
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went fo another AA meeting alone....
(Preview)
Hi all,
So first off I wanted to ask all of you what you think about us AlAnon folksgoing to open AA meetings by ourselves? I e gone to two already. Last night I went and literally cried from happiness seeing all these wonderful souls fighting for their sobriety and living the best life they can. It made m...
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Elabella
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12
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3342
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Mean then nice!
(Preview)
I am on a roller coaster right now. It is even affecting my sleep! My ah is acting out. I guess it is all about him. He us a recovering alcoholic but he is mean then nice. He is not facing something that is making him accusatory & flat out bullying me. I am trying not to react but it is hard. He is pushing me &...
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Hoot Nanny
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9
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804
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C2C, July 25 - Illusions
(Preview)
This is a powerful page! The author realizes that life was unmanageable -- not because of facts but because of illusions. Eventually they listened to a suggestion that helped them see the light: The idea that we can control another person is an illusion. Life is better when we let go and let God. Th...
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Freetime
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6
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1518
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does anyone celebrate?
(Preview)
Has anyone ever celebrated their birthday for a month? I am an example of over a week. I have been celebrating sober for the longest time! IT is so nice that so many people want to be w/ me at all except my total family! I guess I am worth it; I just am open to any kind of celebrating. I have to say that even the ov...
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Hoot Nanny
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4
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388
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Lost ring and stuff
(Preview)
Hi guys. A while ago I was a member of this board, and I used the al-anon wisdom I gained to leave an abusive relationship. That was a good thing; this board and the transformitive wisdom I received saved my life, and my child's life too. Unfortunately I didn't do very well myself; once I was free and clear...
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MelissaK
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16
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520
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So hard to differentiate between the disease
(Preview)
I know he has a disease, but the anger, mean behavior. It's so hard not to hate this person!
He says he no longer loves me, hates me, yada, yada
I just want to scream!!
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Carla61
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5
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1704
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reaching out
(Preview)
hi again, just wondered if any one here has had any experience with loved one with tbi,traumatic brain injury my sister was in a bad wreck yrs ago 2014,i think. they came to me the dr,at the time we werent on speaking terms,drugs related reasons. she had emergengy surgery done on her neck due to broken al...
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lookingup
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11
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1856
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ODAT reading 7-23
(Preview)
TheeODATC reading for Tuesday, July 22 speaks about attempting to understand the disease of alcoholism because we think it will help us to better cope with the problem.The reading suggests understanding the disease is not going to help us respond in a different fashion- we need to study the Al-An...
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hotrod
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4
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3896
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Need to let go of the fear
(Preview)
Here is my situation. I have been married for 30 years, 25 out of those my husband has been an alcoholic. AH will not seek counseling, due to his childhood traumas, he is trying to fix himself by not seeking counseling by self medicating with beer. AH works nights so there is nothing for him to do on his nig...
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Lindie
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7
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552
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Courage to Change 7/24/19
(Preview)
Posting early for tomorrow as we have a super early tee time! Tomorrow's reading talks about doormat status, recovery and courage! The author suggests they arrived @ Al-Anon with a history of letting others take advantage and quite a collection of anger, resentments and guilt. The author often...
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Iamhere
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2
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577
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HELP WITH BOUNDARIES..
(Preview)
Oh my goodness, the last few days I've been on a tear setting boundaries. Today however I'm struggling. My AH just texted and called me from work asking if I could go to the beer store for him. He is working very late, and all beer stores will be closed by the time he is done. He cannot leave work. He has to be t...
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Elabella
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19
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3089
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Courage to Change July 24
(Preview)
Hello MIP! Today's reading from C2C is about step 11 (Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood him, praying for the knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry that out.) The author shares that, for them, doing God's will means that, at a...
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Skorpi
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4
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501
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New here
(Preview)
Tomorrow Im going to attend my first Al Anon meeting!
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MollyWisk
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11
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529
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C2C, 7/22
(Preview)
The reading for Monday, 7/22, discusses placing principles above personalities. The author says that each meeting can be an opportunity to practice this concept. We dont have to like the personalities of the people in our meetings, but we can remember that we all need each other in order to recove...
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Lyne
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8
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1722
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miracles everywhere!
(Preview)
Don't leave before the miracle. I found mine after over 33 years & 2 husbands. I am so grateful that God gave me all the close relationships I had w/ men. Some will leave a lasting memory. Some will just leave! I am so excited about my future. So many love & have loved me in the past. Today is just ano...
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Hoot Nanny
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6
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2085
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Hope for Today July 21
(Preview)
Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about the power of a group and the unity within it. The writer describes having grown up in a family that did not communicate well and did not demonstrate unity, but rather isolation. Part of the strength of alanon is coming to a place where others have shared...
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yanksfan51
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5
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1520
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I've been told I am not an enabler yet I know I need help
(Preview)
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RolliesMom
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8
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3824
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ODAT - July 19 - Worldwide Fellowship
(Preview)
I just love the July 19 page in ODAT. It points out that our participation in Al-Anon makes us part of a worldwide network of groups that are all working towards the same purpose, and that what we do makes us brothers and sisters with people all around the world, regardless of nationality, race, color,...
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Freetime
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4
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1986
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what can I say?
(Preview)
I am so grateful that my Ah is now my friend again. I guess things just work out w/ prayer & patience God can really work miracles. I believe that our marriage is a gift from God. He healed me & now my Ah is not angry or frustrated anymore. But this a one day at a time program. I am just grateful for toda...
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Hoot Nanny
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5
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1718
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Courage to Change 7/18/19
(Preview)
Sorry for the late post MIP family. Today's reading talks about recovery being a process, with improvements over time and not overnight! Many come to Al-Anon with a philosophy that if something works, it will work even better and faster if we try harder. Instead, we discover that recovery is a long...
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Iamhere
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2
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2113
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2 different agendas ..
(Preview)
With 2 different perceptions. I seem to be having this particular life lesson a LOT recently. I just had to laugh at some of the not so silly and the silliness of it all. Maybe it's the absurdity. I have been trying to rebalance my life and my sig other is def a big part and in the picture .. lol. We are go...
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SerenityRUS
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4
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1703
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Service Work in the Program Has Rewards
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, I've been in a bit of a rut lately with service work in Alanon. Our program suggests rotation of service responsibilities so that no one person dominates a particular service position and others can then volunteer and continue to grow. I'm seeing how applying this principle to my own rec...
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tiredtonite
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3
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1778
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Courage to Change July 17
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading from C2C, the author reflects on how enmeshed they had become with 2 people close to them who were new to recovery. While these two individuals were drinking, the author lost sight of the fact that they could be happy even if the 2 alcoholics were depressed, that the autho...
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Skorpi
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4
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1555
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Re-found my voice & Anxiety - support please!
(Preview)
I do love how this program works and I return time after time for support to trust the process. It's been an unusual month of one life curve ball after the next; nothing life-threatening, but large things nonetheless: 1) My daughter will be married soon and this precipitated a whole new level of crazy...
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bud
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14
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3255
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Relapse to old behaviours...
(Preview)
Good morning all. Im feeling very sad and ashamed of myself today. Last night I went out with my AH to see a live band play. I made the very HUGE mistake of drinking along with him. Crazy, right? Thats the denial in me thinking its ok to do so. We used to do it all the time without an issue! So why didnt I even thi...
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Elabella
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11
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2686
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ODAT reading 7-16
(Preview)
The ODAT reading for today July 16 speaks about the word :" maturity". I defines maturity as the capacity to withstand the ego destroying experiences and not lose one's perspective in the ego building experiences The reason it defines maturity is that the experts believe that many ofus arrive in...
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hotrod
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5
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957
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Need some perspective.
(Preview)
Having re-reviewed some of the literature on family roles, I'm looking at some of my own traits. One of them is the inability not to take "failure" personally. That go to reaction of deeply believing that failing to foresee xyz caused the failure. It is really really hard to shake that beleif! I'm logi...
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a4l
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5
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711
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Teen having problems-- ia it due to AH?
(Preview)
OMG. My 15 year old son just opened up to me he is being bullied AGAIN at high school. (was bullied in grade school and had to move schools. Bulllied in Freshman year diffent kids/reasons. Now apparently all sophomore year.) He didn't tell me that anything had happened this year--I had no clue-...
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Dancer66
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7
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1401
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A Brother found our dear friend DEAD- Now hes MIA
(Preview)
Friday morning my BMF found his BEST ever friend DEAD!!!!! his friend/boss is writing to me on private messenger telling me about it, hinting about ME doing something, trying to find my NOW MIA brother who most likely is drinking his sorrows away... Its sad!! Terrible!!! I knew "Cliffy" for abou...
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mamalioness
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8
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830
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