Good morning MIP - Happy August!  Today's reading is primary about the three C's we learn in Al-Anon.  We did not cause alcoholism, we can't control alcoholism and we can't cure it either.  The writer, like so many came to Al-Anon to learn how to get a loved one to stop drinking.  The writer had hopes that life would return to 'normal' once this happened.

Instead, the author came upon the three C's, and learned how to apply the Twelve Steps to self so that sanity and contentment can be had, whether the A is still drinking or not.  The first principle - keep the focus on self.

The author came to see that she had problems of her own that needed attention.  She realized that slowly and subtly, she had developed unhealthy ways of trying to cope with the disease.  By sharing openly in Al-Anon meetings, and being willing to let go of attitudes that no longer seemed appropriate, she was able to shed some of these destructive habits.  In time, she regained her true self and began to grow again.

Today's Reminder:  I do not respond well when someone tries to impose their will on me; why have I tried to impose my will on those around me?  There is only one person I am responsible for, and that is me.  There is only one person who can make my life as full as possible -- that, too, is me.

Today's Quote from . . . . In All Our Affairs:  "Today I will keep hands off and keep my focus on where it belongs, on me.:

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I actually left my first meeting  frustrated, disappointed and sad that nobody had the answers I desperately wanted to stop those around me from consuming alcohol.  I had huge blinders up and truly did believe if only they would stop, all would be well!  I had not arrived with an open mind, but rather arrived with an agenda, driven by my own ego, self-will and need/want to control and change everyone else, but me.

With the gift of desperation, I returned to a different meeting and practiced having an open mind.  This was hard for me, simply because I had so much 'mental clutter' in my brain.  I was obsessed with the past, fretting about the future and just plain scared of today.  The three C's were the first thing I heard that made sense to me.  While rolling that around in my mind, I realized I was breathing deeper in that Al-Anon meeting than I had in a long while, and was able to focus on just that!  The insanity in my own mind had been lifted, if only for a moment.

I found myself with others who could relate to me, my thoughts and my disease.  I found others who had been able to stop reacting to the insanity, and instead respond.  I found others who were able to replace their obsessive, controlling thoughts with positive, healthy thoughts.  Most importantly for me, I found others who had peace of mind, genuine joy and serenity.  I felt there was hope for me for the first time in a long time!

Practice, practice, practice was stressed to me over and over again.  Progress, not perfection was shared over and over again.  Pause, Pray and then Proceed became my mantra, and I didn't even know who or what I was praying to yet it helped me slow my racing mind, and consider different ways to be, live, respond, act.

I am grateful for the gift of humility I received from working the steps.  Today, I can see clearly that most of my issues with this disease were magnified and compounded by my own unhealthy thoughts and actions.  I can continue to heal and be genuinely joyful no matter what anyone else is doing around me.  I am no longer ever alone, as I have a HP who truly loves me and guides me each day.  Al-Anon has truly restored me to sanity and allowed me to grow in ways I never dreamed of!  An attitude of gratitude practiced each morning sets the stage for better days, one day at a time.

Happy Thursday MIP family - golf was rained out today which works out good for me!  I always have a Plan B (thank you Al-Anon).  Make it a great day - find and keep your joy!