Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

tobyo · tobyo

but not to al anon. I went to about 6 months worth of meetings oh, about 2 years ago. I don't do well talking in front of groups. but writing is a different story! a friend told me about this and well, here I am ;) I am planning to attend (hopefully) some of the morning meetings during the week. that i...

kitty · kitty

I was always encouraged to make things growing up. Three years ago I made a card for my "parents" (mother & her husband - the aalb). It was their 23rd Anniversary (last week they are at 26) - it was really special to me, I love the #23, here goes the card: Love is never ending infini...

Evilynn · Evilynn

My mother went on a drinking binge and told my father she wanted to go back home to Boston. He of course listened to her, when she was drunk and got her a plane ticket. He alerted her family, they changed their plans and their lives and then she changed her mind at the last minute. And why not, she made her dec...

Kim · Kim

Hey Roomies: Last night I started being a little "uncomfortable" with the fact that I haven't heard from my A since Sunday. Actaully as far as him contacting me it's been since Sat. I have to travel past the sober house in the morning to get to work, so I see he is there, but no call. This is new to me...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

hi everyone and thank you so much for all of your supportive replies. as for the topic of boundaries/ consequences the boundary is already set he cant come home while drunk/high so he comes home early the next day. but he is usually still high. he handed all his bank and credit cards over to me so he wont ev...

sandie123 · sandie123

I got this today and thought it might help others as it did me. The past has flown away. The coming month and year do not exist; ours only is the present's tiny point. --Shabestari We are tempted to look back and to look ahead. But what we most need to do is be present in this moment, wit...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

well my a went to work today which is a huge surprise. he came home for lunch walked right up to me and was crying. he said im so sorry. i feel so bad. i need help and i will do it all on my own. i know you dont believe me. apparantly there was no coke being used last night because no one had money. dont know i...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

Hi Group, I posted yesterday asking about the affects of withdrawel that marijuana may have on someone. I got some good responses. Well, I got home yesterday and my "a" says, "Well, I won't be drug tested for another 4or5 weeks" So of course this gives him a reason to continue to u...

Barbara · Barbara

How many f2f meetings do you get to each week? Im trying a new place this Sat - find it difficult to get out during the week. I have both a teen and an A husband at home.

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Escape into Sleep After we stop eating compulsively, we may be tempted to use sleep as a form of escape. Though not as detrimental as excess food, too much sleep can also make us lethargic and dull. The danger lies in allowing ourselves to escape the realities of living, rather than coping with the...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Wisdom for Today When I first came into the program, I was overwhelmed by the thought of never drinking or using drugs again. The thoughts of "forever" seemed like too much to handle. Fortunately, I learned quickly that all I needed to do was stay focused on today. There was nothing I could do about al...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

kind of figured out a little bit about what im troubled with. im seeing my a is not suffering any consequences from his behavior lately. he knows im not leaving because its not what i truley want right now and im not ready. so please give me some suggestions on consequences i could give him that dont inclu...

bobump · bobump

We got on the top in my step meeting today about Trust. Someone mentioned that they trust everyone until they get burned and how this wasn't healthy. I was giving the acknowledging nod and chuckling thinking that is me. Trust, most definately an asset. Taken to an extreme it cou...

Lauren ashley · Lauren ashley

I always had you, but never acknowledged it I wanted someone to love me I wanted someone to care I never acknowledged that you God were always there I had something missing in my heart For my life was falling apart I thought you God had abandoned me For I was lost in the dark, and I c...

gardengal · gardengal

"Keep coming back" is a phrase we often hear in alanon.Why is it so important? Because many of us have grown hardened in our fights with alcoholics or flights from alcoholics that we basically found it difficult to sit still for the process of recovery. We had to have answers right away or take actions r...

Barbara · Barbara

In Aug husband had his left kidney removed. The cancer was malignent but encapsulated. (That wasnt enough to get him to quit drinking. He actually increased!) Today he's off to the thyroid doctor. They did the ultrasounds, ctscans, etc. There are more lumps and I believe they are planning on needl...

sg · sg

Yesterday was the three kid's school conferences. The two oldest (15 and 13) are mine from a previous relationship. The youngest, 6, is my A's biological son. When I met my A. he was so excited to have me and my kids in his life. After his relapse years ago (and continued drinking) their relationshi...

Froggie · Froggie

I just found this board and was so excited to find it. I haven't attended an AlAnon meeting since last July when I moved from one state to another. I am really beginning to feel the need for meetings but there are so few here compared to all the choices that I had while living in MA. Whil...

nikkilou · nikkilou

Hi all, On my way to work I got to thinking. We had given are old car to my sister and I took it back for a few days while mine is getting fixed. This car is old but runs fine. I got rid of it because of what I think of when I'm in this car. Almost a year ago my A was at his worst or so I thou...

Jeannie · Jeannie

Hi, I'm little confused right now. I am trying to do what's right. To sum it up quickly for anyone that doesn't know. Here goes; My husband was diagnosed with Alcohol Liver Disease, then he got fired from his job for drinking. He continued to drink, wasn't helping me with the kids, and was s...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

well its quarter after three in the morning and guess what my a still isnt home. big surprise. i dont have any feelings right now on this. i kept myself busy with my best friend. we went shopping and painted some of my furniture. it looks great. she just left. im not surprised he's not home. i had a little bi...

JulieLynn · JulieLynn

Well I went by the house yesterday to pack some things and some of the utilities had been shut off. (they were in my name) My husband was irate! He threatened to "stomp me in the ground", throw my personal belongings in the yard and called me every name he could think of. I found myself...

cdb · cdb

Hello friends :) I am home and all is going well. I so enjoyed the time with my parents and things there for me are stressful, enjoyable, exhausting and relaxing. My mom had tests and has bleeding in her stomach :( We will find out later what is causing it and get the biopsy results back. I think it...

kitty · kitty

Today started out great, it's sorta gone down hill. I've been staying at my mom's, I want the company as much as she does & we love each other so much. It's just hard, for years she begged me to get therapy, here I go off to the therapist, taking her along with me, but she over reacts some...

zoomie · zoomie

Hi I'm zoomie and in recovery myself,but I'm dealing with a 15 year old daughter who is using. I'v tried everything for this child, I put her into a psy ward 2xs for her overdosing and in a rehab. We are now in the process of doing out patent and her seeing someone for her eating disorder,but s...

sg · sg

Being that I am asking my A. to leave the house while he attempts treatment and recovery, in my mind it is as if I have just met him. I am back to March of 1998. I will not let good memories cloud my judgement. I will try my hardest to not become emotionally nostalgic and forget the issues at hand. I will tr...

Karilynn · Karilynn

Hello roomies, To all of those who kept me sane and in your prayers this past week. THANK YOU! My A and I met with the doctor. Turns out I've known her for years becuase she's in the store all the time. Everything is fine. While she wants to check the mass out, she is not overly concerned. It's probably n...

sallyb · sallyb

I haven't written in a week. I sit and I read the posts and the responses that are put out and feel the most amazing range of emotion from minute to minute and it seems that I never really know what to say. I thought I was done being angry, yet it keeps creeping back in and lingering unt...

Barbara · Barbara

depression is getting me nowhere. I no longer want to feel like a martyr. Thanks everyone for opening my eyes. I think Im finally starting to "get it"! Midday today I took a look at a bookmark someone gave me last wk "Just for Today" and you know if I act like Im happy, maybe I'll be happy. Cant hurt to try. Th...

captcodee · captcodee

~Courage To Change Oct 11~ Do I find that I constantly analyze things to avoid making decisions?" - Yikes, how do they know that??? I am responsible for my own misery, and my own happiness. If I find that the stove is too hot, I won't analyze the heat, I shall not touch it. If I like the tempe...

Kim · Kim

I accomplished alot this weekend and felt the need to set some goals for myself this week. Since I do not have a lot of hobbies (well, actually none at all) and not alot of friends to do things with I felt like I needed of course to focus more on me than feeling like that (ya think?). I decided to...

Barbara · Barbara

I wake up most days now ANGRY. How do I let go of this Anger? I find myself taking it out on everyone except my alcoholic husband. He I try ignoring. Well not really - its eating me up inside. But Im exploding at my son, exploding at work.

twinmom2 · twinmom2

Hello All~ I've really been trying to grasp the "Let Go Let God" concept. For so long I have tried to control everything in my life, but I'm recognizing now that I cannot control anything beyond myself. My challenge this week has been my children. They're two and going through so...

Anne · Anne

Hi my name is Anne. I feel as if I am dying inside. I have not been to an al-anon meeting in town. they are all at 7 pm at night and I have two small children that struggle with school enough with out mommy being gone. My husband right now is in detox for the second time in 4 months. I believe he is killing him se...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

tomorrow is the day that my a is going to a concert with his drinking/drugging friends. my a said he will be designated driver and will not drink nor do drugs tomorrow. i do have fears this is just another binge. but for myself i have already made plans to go shopping with my bff and have a girls night. who kn...

nycbt · nycbt

I have talk to my sponsor and she has told me that I am doing better. I can actually feel the progress of my strength. I am not giving in as of yet. He is getting nervous because he is losing control. I have been told since he is losing control he is going to be getting worse. So I should prepare myself. I am goin...

hudsond · hudsond

Well, My a came home last night and said he had started using again. I kinda figured he had because you can always tell--you know that definite attitude change. He has been using for a week. I had tried to be calm all last week, even though I could feel that he was probably messing up-I didn't...

BlueCloud · BlueCloud

Roomies, I've really been struggling with the whole concept of turning things over to God. It seems I'm afraid that if I do that I won't be able to micro-manage, control, and monitor the situation. LOL. But, seriously, giving up control is scary. I realized last week that while turning it ove...

kissers · kissers

I have been through too many tumultuous relationships in the past several years. My relationship before the last one was lasted for two years. It lasted two years because I did all the work, so there really wasn't a relationship. I remember him always showing up late(up to 2 hrs late) when we had plans....

kissers · kissers

Hi All! I found this website yesterday, so I thought I would share it with all of you....(especially Lauren Ashley) http://www.teras-wish.com/index.htm

Scottishgirl · Scottishgirl

well it's Tuesday night, this is usually one of my good night, cause my husband usually doesn't get drunk on mondays or tuesdays. but lo and behold here we go again. again he called to say it was someone else's fault, they dragged him to the bar.. thing is we have NO money, like nothing. i gavehim our last b...

hopefortoday · hopefortoday

It has been "one of those weeks" at work. When I got into the office and checked my email on Monday, I assembled a list of things my manager had sent my way that I thought would be reasonable to accomplish this week. But as usual, on Tuesday, he slipped something another report he needed in. And on Wednes...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

The Victim Trap The belief that life has to be hard and difficult in the belief that makes a martyr.We can change our negative beliefs about life, and whether we have the power to stop our pain and take care of ourselves.We aren't helpless. We can solve our problems. We do have power - not to change or...

Lauren ashley · Lauren ashley

I just thought I'd share this..I received it in an email..and like it..hope u do too enjoy... I've never made a fortune, and it's probably too late now. But I don't worry about that much, I'm happy anyhow And as I go along life's way, I'm reaping better than I sowed. I'm drinking from...

gardengal · gardengal

Here are some thoughts I have to inspire you to keep moving forward. But nothing is going to ring more true than your own carefully chosen words. So think about where you want to go---physically, spiritually, mentally------your "choice". Once you've decided, write it down and now you have a simple a...

kitty · kitty

Molecularly science tells us, we are all the same. The same molecules that make up the table & chair, are also the tree, the universe & a human being - just in different "arrangements".

They say we are made in God's image: I believe this to mean that we have the power...

debilyn · debilyn

I have had something troubling me for a month and am at my wits end. Been doing every bit of footwork I can find. I have been hear a lot of years so i am sure many know me pretty well since am such a blabber mouth, open person. It is personal so if you are willing to problem solve with me, I really ...

Barbara · Barbara

Is either less important than the other? I feel that letting people know that youre taking care of your physical self is more accepted than taking are of your emotional self. How can we make that other part just as important?

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

When I came to Al-Anon I had no peace in my life. My faith was hidden from me. My love was a slowly dying ember hidden under the ashes of my life. What did I have left? I entered the chat room here that first day and told my story, how I was so miserable, on the verge of a divorce, didn...

Lauren ashley · Lauren ashley

xxxx...im pissed off right now..I told my gpa if he can take me to an alanon meeting..and he bitched saying do i have to go everyday I told them how much it meant to me...Without it I have nothing..bc my grandparents don't understand they are too old,and already set in their ways I am actually crying rig...

Barbara · Barbara

and having to do all this crap? They're drinking is THEIR problem. Why cant THEY get help and not come back to us until THEY'RE better? why is it US having to go get help? WE're already being punished living with this crap why arent THEY doing something about it and getting help?

Evilynn · Evilynn

This is hard for me,to admit I am failing and that this relationship that I tried to save is not good for me or him. My boyfriend is an alcoholic. I guess I learned this behavior because my mother is also an alcoholic and my father tries to control her, me and everyone else he knows. He has joined the program...

UncleLou · UncleLou

Thank you all for your support and empathy while I'm going through this. I really was at a point where I didn't care if I lived or not, but not at the point of considering taking my own life. I know these feelings will pass. One thing I heard about us alcoholics; our emotional development stops about the...

nycbt · nycbt

When I first meet my husband 6 yrs ago I did everything with him. I really didn't go any where didn't have any girlfriends at all. Only really had too guy friends and that was really it. Then this year I went to an Alanon online meeting and started to chat with my now best friend and we were seeing that we were...

nycbt · nycbt

Yesterday I have started to do a log on how many times I am calling my husband. I wanted to call him 8 times and I end up calling him 4 of those times. When I logged all the times and the reason I was like wow that is alot of times. However I am proud fo my self for only calling him 4 so I cut down on the calls by half. O...

nycbt · nycbt

Yesterday my husband has asked me about taking the car so he could go to the srap yaurd. I said no so he punished me. His son had to go to somewhere and my husband didn't want to take the ride but it is his grown son and the neighborhood isn't the nicest so he came. But he punish me the whole time. He started to ar...

Kim · Kim

First, I would like to thnak you all for your posts. I had decided while I was in the attorney's office that I would give it unitl after the holidays to say anything. I had also mentioned it in conversations with my A, that maybe we should consider a formal separation he said to me: "if you d...

Barbara · Barbara

another sick day! and he's planning on taking Thurs too because of a doctor apt! what a lazy ass - how do i go about finding a lawyer? and in MA do they get 50/50? cos thats the only thing holding me back! why should get 50% of my retirement?

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

A.A. Thought for the Day I am less sensitive and my feelings are less easily hurt. I no longer take myself so seriously. It didn't used to take much to insult me, to feel that I had been slighted or left on the outside. What happens to me now is not so important. One cause of our drinking was that we could...

Lani · Lani

Hi Friends, During Hurricane Wilma I was forced to listen to radio (snortle) and happened upon a show about people who suck the living daylights out of you and why. Thought this missive would be something you might find valuable to think about and add to your...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	I'm new too (Preview) but not to al anon. I went to about 6 months worth of meetings oh, about 2 years ago. I don't do well talking in front of groups. but writing is a different story! a friend told me about this and well, here I am ;) I am planning to attend (hopefully) some of the morning meetings during the week. that i...	tobyo	5	650	Nov 17, 2005 by tobyo
	A Poem of Love (Preview) I was always encouraged to make things growing up. Three years ago I made a card for my "parents" (mother & her husband - the aalb). It was their 23rd Anniversary (last week they are at 26) - it was really special to me, I love the #23, here goes the card: Love is never ending infini...	kitty	5	653	Nov 17, 2005 by Jeannie
	This week so far... (Preview) My mother went on a drinking binge and told my father she wanted to go back home to Boston. He of course listened to her, when she was drunk and got her a plane ticket. He alerted her family, they changed their plans and their lives and then she changed her mind at the last minute. And why not, she made her dec...	Evilynn	3	314	Nov 17, 2005 by Kim
	Haven't heard from my A in a while (Preview) Hey Roomies: Last night I started being a little "uncomfortable" with the fact that I haven't heard from my A since Sunday. Actaully as far as him contacting me it's been since Sat. I have to travel past the sober house in the morning to get to work, so I see he is there, but no call. This is new to me...	Kim	5	389	Nov 17, 2005 by Kim
	the day after (Preview) hi everyone and thank you so much for all of your supportive replies. as for the topic of boundaries/ consequences the boundary is already set he cant come home while drunk/high so he comes home early the next day. but he is usually still high. he handed all his bank and credit cards over to me so he wont ev...	notsonew1111	5	660	Nov 17, 2005 by cdb
	Live for Today.. just a reminder (Preview) I got this today and thought it might help others as it did me. The past has flown away. The coming month and year do not exist; ours only is the present's tiny point. --Shabestari We are tempted to look back and to look ahead. But what we most need to do is be present in this moment, wit...	sandie123	3	429	Nov 17, 2005 by cdb
	this afternoon (Preview) well my a went to work today which is a huge surprise. he came home for lunch walked right up to me and was crying. he said im so sorry. i feel so bad. i need help and i will do it all on my own. i know you dont believe me. apparantly there was no coke being used last night because no one had money. dont know i...	notsonew1111	3	393	Nov 17, 2005 by cdb
	My "a" still wants to use marijuana (Preview) Hi Group, I posted yesterday asking about the affects of withdrawel that marijuana may have on someone. I got some good responses. Well, I got home yesterday and my "a" says, "Well, I won't be drug tested for another 4or5 weeks" So of course this gives him a reason to continue to u...	twinmom2	7	938	Nov 17, 2005 by captcodee
	those w/children and As at home - f2f meetings how many? (Preview) How many f2f meetings do you get to each week? Im trying a new place this Sat - find it difficult to get out during the week. I have both a teen and an A husband at home.	Barbara	7	817	Nov 17, 2005 by AlaMom
	trading one compulsion for another???? (Preview) Escape into Sleep After we stop eating compulsively, we may be tempted to use sleep as a form of escape. Though not as detrimental as excess food, too much sleep can also make us lethargic and dull. The danger lies in allowing ourselves to escape the realities of living, rather than coping with the...	rosie light shines	0	588	Nov 17, 2005 by rosie light shines
	wisdom for today....preparation for my promises (Preview) Wisdom for Today When I first came into the program, I was overwhelmed by the thought of never drinking or using drugs again. The thoughts of "forever" seemed like too much to handle. Fortunately, I learned quickly that all I needed to do was stay focused on today. There was nothing I could do about al...	rosie light shines	0	1051	Nov 17, 2005 by rosie light shines
	consequences? (Preview) kind of figured out a little bit about what im troubled with. im seeing my a is not suffering any consequences from his behavior lately. he knows im not leaving because its not what i truley want right now and im not ready. so please give me some suggestions on consequences i could give him that dont inclu...	notsonew1111	12	707	Nov 17, 2005 by bobump
	The Balance of Trust (Preview) We got on the top in my step meeting today about Trust. Someone mentioned that they trust everyone until they get burned and how this wasn't healthy. I was giving the acknowledging nod and chuckling thinking that is me. Trust, most definately an asset. Taken to an extreme it cou...	bobump	9	607	Nov 17, 2005 by marmare
	I always had you, but never acknowledged it (Preview) I always had you, but never acknowledged it I wanted someone to love me I wanted someone to care I never acknowledged that you God were always there I had something missing in my heart For my life was falling apart I thought you God had abandoned me For I was lost in the dark, and I c...	Lauren ashley	3	504	Nov 17, 2005 by marmare
	KEEP COMING BACK (Preview) "Keep coming back" is a phrase we often hear in alanon.Why is it so important? Because many of us have grown hardened in our fights with alcoholics or flights from alcoholics that we basically found it difficult to sit still for the process of recovery. We had to have answers right away or take actions r...	gardengal	2	771	Nov 17, 2005 by browneyes
	Husband off to thyroid doctor today (Preview) In Aug husband had his left kidney removed. The cancer was malignent but encapsulated. (That wasnt enough to get him to quit drinking. He actually increased!) Today he's off to the thyroid doctor. They did the ultrasounds, ctscans, etc. There are more lumps and I believe they are planning on needl...	Barbara	3	309	Nov 17, 2005 by KathyS
	Clueless (Preview) Yesterday was the three kid's school conferences. The two oldest (15 and 13) are mine from a previous relationship. The youngest, 6, is my A's biological son. When I met my A. he was so excited to have me and my kids in his life. After his relapse years ago (and continued drinking) their relationshi...	sg	1	348	Nov 17, 2005 by Dolphin123
	I'm new to the board (Preview) I just found this board and was so excited to find it. I haven't attended an AlAnon meeting since last July when I moved from one state to another. I am really beginning to feel the need for meetings but there are so few here compared to all the choices that I had while living in MA. Whil...	Froggie	8	561	Nov 17, 2005 by Froggie
	rock bottom (Preview) Hi all, On my way to work I got to thinking. We had given are old car to my sister and I took it back for a few days while mine is getting fixed. This car is old but runs fine. I got rid of it because of what I think of when I'm in this car. Almost a year ago my A was at his worst or so I thou...	nikkilou	9	661	Nov 17, 2005 by twinmom2
	Damned if I do, or if I don't? (Preview) Hi, I'm little confused right now. I am trying to do what's right. To sum it up quickly for anyone that doesn't know. Here goes; My husband was diagnosed with Alcohol Liver Disease, then he got fired from his job for drinking. He continued to drink, wasn't helping me with the kids, and was s...	Jeannie	9	422	Nov 17, 2005 by leo
	the end of my day :( (Preview) well its quarter after three in the morning and guess what my a still isnt home. big surprise. i dont have any feelings right now on this. i kept myself busy with my best friend. we went shopping and painted some of my furniture. it looks great. she just left. im not surprised he's not home. i had a little bi...	notsonew1111	4	646	Nov 17, 2005 by hudsond
	Update on leaving my husband (Preview) Well I went by the house yesterday to pack some things and some of the utilities had been shut off. (they were in my name) My husband was irate! He threatened to "stomp me in the ground", throw my personal belongings in the yard and called me every name he could think of. I found myself...	JulieLynn	8	871	Nov 17, 2005 by JulieLynn
	cdb is back :) (Preview) Hello friends :) I am home and all is going well. I so enjoyed the time with my parents and things there for me are stressful, enjoyable, exhausting and relaxing. My mom had tests and has bleeding in her stomach :( We will find out later what is causing it and get the biopsy results back. I think it...	cdb	8	612	Nov 17, 2005 by leo
	wedged between a rock & a hard place (Preview) Today started out great, it's sorta gone down hill. I've been staying at my mom's, I want the company as much as she does & we love each other so much. It's just hard, for years she begged me to get therapy, here I go off to the therapist, taking her along with me, but she over reacts some...	kitty	4	984	Nov 17, 2005 by leo
	first time in Al-anon (Preview) Hi I'm zoomie and in recovery myself,but I'm dealing with a 15 year old daughter who is using. I'v tried everything for this child, I put her into a psy ward 2xs for her overdosing and in a rehab. We are now in the process of doing out patent and her seeing someone for her eating disorder,but s...	zoomie	6	541	Nov 17, 2005 by zoomie
	My resolution to myself (Preview) Being that I am asking my A. to leave the house while he attempts treatment and recovery, in my mind it is as if I have just met him. I am back to March of 1998. I will not let good memories cloud my judgement. I will try my hardest to not become emotionally nostalgic and forget the issues at hand. I will tr...	sg	4	630	Nov 17, 2005 by leo
	Doctor's visit (Preview) Hello roomies, To all of those who kept me sane and in your prayers this past week. THANK YOU! My A and I met with the doctor. Turns out I've known her for years becuase she's in the store all the time. Everything is fine. While she wants to check the mass out, she is not overly concerned. It's probably n...	Karilynn	6	571	Nov 17, 2005 by leo
	The Confusion of my Emotions (Preview) I haven't written in a week. I sit and I read the posts and the responses that are put out and feel the most amazing range of emotion from minute to minute and it seems that I never really know what to say. I thought I was done being angry, yet it keeps creeping back in and lingering unt...	sallyb	5	394	Nov 17, 2005 by leo
	Im ready to give up "feeling like a martyr" (Preview) depression is getting me nowhere. I no longer want to feel like a martyr. Thanks everyone for opening my eyes. I think Im finally starting to "get it"! Midday today I took a look at a bookmark someone gave me last wk "Just for Today" and you know if I act like Im happy, maybe I'll be happy. Cant hurt to try. Th...	Barbara	9	1114	Nov 17, 2005 by nmike
	Just how simple.... (Preview) ~Courage To Change Oct 11~ Do I find that I constantly analyze things to avoid making decisions?" - Yikes, how do they know that??? I am responsible for my own misery, and my own happiness. If I find that the stove is too hot, I won't analyze the heat, I shall not touch it. If I like the tempe...	captcodee	9	682	Nov 16, 2005 by Jeannie
	this week I set goals for myself (Preview) I accomplished alot this weekend and felt the need to set some goals for myself this week. Since I do not have a lot of hobbies (well, actually none at all) and not alot of friends to do things with I felt like I needed of course to focus more on me than feeling like that (ya think?). I decided to...	Kim	3	404	Nov 16, 2005 by Karilynn
	how do you let go of the Anger? (Preview) I wake up most days now ANGRY. How do I let go of this Anger? I find myself taking it out on everyone except my alcoholic husband. He I try ignoring. Well not really - its eating me up inside. But Im exploding at my son, exploding at work.	Barbara	3	690	Nov 16, 2005 by canadianguy
	Living for me is way over due... (Preview) Hello All~ I've really been trying to grasp the "Let Go Let God" concept. For so long I have tried to control everything in my life, but I'm recognizing now that I cannot control anything beyond myself. My challenge this week has been my children. They're two and going through so...	twinmom2	6	429	Nov 16, 2005 by KathyS
	desperate (Preview) Hi my name is Anne. I feel as if I am dying inside. I have not been to an al-anon meeting in town. they are all at 7 pm at night and I have two small children that struggle with school enough with out mommy being gone. My husband right now is in detox for the second time in 4 months. I believe he is killing him se...	Anne	15	489	Nov 16, 2005 by Rebecca
	tomarow is the day (Preview) tomorrow is the day that my a is going to a concert with his drinking/drugging friends. my a said he will be designated driver and will not drink nor do drugs tomorrow. i do have fears this is just another binge. but for myself i have already made plans to go shopping with my bff and have a girls night. who kn...	notsonew1111	7	577	Nov 16, 2005 by canadianguy
	doing better (Preview) I have talk to my sponsor and she has told me that I am doing better. I can actually feel the progress of my strength. I am not giving in as of yet. He is getting nervous because he is losing control. I have been told since he is losing control he is going to be getting worse. So I should prepare myself. I am goin...	nycbt	5	510	Nov 16, 2005 by marmare
	Here I go again (Preview) Well, My a came home last night and said he had started using again. I kinda figured he had because you can always tell--you know that definite attitude change. He has been using for a week. I had tried to be calm all last week, even though I could feel that he was probably messing up-I didn't...	hudsond	4	519	Nov 16, 2005 by marmare
	Leaning on HP (Preview) Roomies, I've really been struggling with the whole concept of turning things over to God. It seems I'm afraid that if I do that I won't be able to micro-manage, control, and monitor the situation. LOL. But, seriously, giving up control is scary. I realized last week that while turning it ove...	BlueCloud	6	549	Nov 16, 2005 by hudsond
	I Don't Live There Anymore (Preview) I have been through too many tumultuous relationships in the past several years. My relationship before the last one was lasted for two years. It lasted two years because I did all the work, so there really wasn't a relationship. I remember him always showing up late(up to 2 hrs late) when we had plans....	kissers	5	481	Nov 16, 2005 by marmare
	Great website (Preview) Hi All! I found this website yesterday, so I thought I would share it with all of you....(especially Lauren Ashley) http://www.teras-wish.com/index.htm	kissers	2	517	Nov 16, 2005 by marmare
	here we go again (Preview) well it's Tuesday night, this is usually one of my good night, cause my husband usually doesn't get drunk on mondays or tuesdays. but lo and behold here we go again. again he called to say it was someone else's fault, they dragged him to the bar.. thing is we have NO money, like nothing. i gavehim our last b...	Scottishgirl	6	456	Nov 16, 2005 by marmare
	doing what is in front of me to do (Preview) It has been "one of those weeks" at work. When I got into the office and checked my email on Monday, I assembled a list of things my manager had sent my way that I thought would be reasonable to accomplish this week. But as usual, on Tuesday, he slipped something another report he needed in. And on Wednes...	hopefortoday	1	513	Nov 16, 2005 by nycbt
	language of letting go......victim trap (Preview) The Victim Trap The belief that life has to be hard and difficult in the belief that makes a martyr.We can change our negative beliefs about life, and whether we have the power to stop our pain and take care of ourselves.We aren't helpless. We can solve our problems. We do have power - not to change or...	rosie light shines	0	560	Nov 16, 2005 by rosie light shines
	Love never gives up,never loses faith,and is always hopeful,and endures (Preview) I just thought I'd share this..I received it in an email..and like it..hope u do too enjoy... I've never made a fortune, and it's probably too late now. But I don't worry about that much, I'm happy anyhow And as I go along life's way, I'm reaping better than I sowed. I'm drinking from...	Lauren ashley	4	740	Nov 16, 2005 by cdb
	HOW TO MOVE FORWARD......... (Preview) Here are some thoughts I have to inspire you to keep moving forward. But nothing is going to ring more true than your own carefully chosen words. So think about where you want to go---physically, spiritually, mentally------your "choice". Once you've decided, write it down and now you have a simple a...	gardengal	4	514	Nov 16, 2005 by cdb
	the science of God, the Divine Plan (Preview) Molecularly science tells us, we are all the same. The same molecules that make up the table & chair, are also the tree, the universe & a human being - just in different "arrangements". They say we are made in God's image: I believe this to mean that we have the power...	kitty	4	602	Nov 16, 2005 by cdb
	Need guidance (Preview) I have had something troubling me for a month and am at my wits end. Been doing every bit of footwork I can find. I have been hear a lot of years so i am sure many know me pretty well since am such a blabber mouth, open person. It is personal so if you are willing to problem solve with me, I really ...	debilyn	3	487	Nov 16, 2005 by cdb
	why is it easier to work on our physical self rather than our emotional self? (Preview) Is either less important than the other? I feel that letting people know that youre taking care of your physical self is more accepted than taking are of your emotional self. How can we make that other part just as important?	Barbara	3	822	Nov 16, 2005 by cdb
	Hope (Preview) When I came to Al-Anon I had no peace in my life. My faith was hidden from me. My love was a slowly dying ember hidden under the ashes of my life. What did I have left? I entered the chat room here that first day and told my story, how I was so miserable, on the verge of a divorce, didn...	kismetstrand	6	578	Nov 16, 2005 by marmare
	I can't take this... (Preview) xxxx...im pissed off right now..I told my gpa if he can take me to an alanon meeting..and he bitched saying do i have to go everyday I told them how much it meant to me...Without it I have nothing..bc my grandparents don't understand they are too old,and already set in their ways I am actually crying rig...	Lauren ashley	7	509	Nov 16, 2005 by canadianguy
	why since its THEM being assholes is it US being punished (Preview) and having to do all this crap? They're drinking is THEIR problem. Why cant THEY get help and not come back to us until THEY'RE better? why is it US having to go get help? WE're already being punished living with this crap why arent THEY doing something about it and getting help?	Barbara	12	490	Nov 16, 2005 by WakingUp
	I am new and I have so much to learn (Preview) This is hard for me,to admit I am failing and that this relationship that I tried to save is not good for me or him. My boyfriend is an alcoholic. I guess I learned this behavior because my mother is also an alcoholic and my father tries to control her, me and everyone else he knows. He has joined the program...	Evilynn	10	736	Nov 16, 2005 by leo
	Re: UncleLou are you Okay? (Preview) Thank you all for your support and empathy while I'm going through this. I really was at a point where I didn't care if I lived or not, but not at the point of considering taking my own life. I know these feelings will pass. One thing I heard about us alcoholics; our emotional development stops about the...	UncleLou	10	890	Nov 16, 2005 by leo
	I used to do everything with him (Preview) When I first meet my husband 6 yrs ago I did everything with him. I really didn't go any where didn't have any girlfriends at all. Only really had too guy friends and that was really it. Then this year I went to an Alanon online meeting and started to chat with my now best friend and we were seeing that we were...	nycbt	3	509	Nov 15, 2005 by Kim
	Logging my calls (Preview) Yesterday I have started to do a log on how many times I am calling my husband. I wanted to call him 8 times and I end up calling him 4 of those times. When I logged all the times and the reason I was like wow that is alot of times. However I am proud fo my self for only calling him 4 so I cut down on the calls by half. O...	nycbt	3	372	Nov 15, 2005 by marmare
	I am stronger (Preview) Yesterday my husband has asked me about taking the car so he could go to the srap yaurd. I said no so he punished me. His son had to go to somewhere and my husband didn't want to take the ride but it is his grown son and the neighborhood isn't the nicest so he came. But he punish me the whole time. He started to ar...	nycbt	3	451	Nov 15, 2005 by marmare
	Telling him about the lawyer visit (Preview) First, I would like to thnak you all for your posts. I had decided while I was in the attorney's office that I would give it unitl after the holidays to say anything. I had also mentioned it in conversations with my A, that maybe we should consider a formal separation he said to me: "if you d...	Kim	2	344	Nov 15, 2005 by Jeannie
	Its time to kick his ass out! (Preview) another sick day! and he's planning on taking Thurs too because of a doctor apt! what a lazy ass - how do i go about finding a lawyer? and in MA do they get 50/50? cos thats the only thing holding me back! why should get 50% of my retirement?	Barbara	5	626	Nov 15, 2005 by rosie light shines
	AA thought.....God DOES have me covered (Preview) A.A. Thought for the Day I am less sensitive and my feelings are less easily hurt. I no longer take myself so seriously. It didn't used to take much to insult me, to feel that I had been slighted or left on the outside. What happens to me now is not so important. One cause of our drinking was that we could...	rosie light shines	0	538	Nov 15, 2005 by rosie light shines
	ENERGY VAMPIRES (Preview) Hi Friends, During Hurricane Wilma I was forced to listen to radio (snortle) and happened upon a show about people who suck the living daylights out of you and why. Thought this missive would be something you might find valuable to think about and add to your...	Lani	6	466	Nov 15, 2005 by Lani
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.