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nothing to say to her
(Preview)
The holidays are always a challenge, and this year is no different.
My father remains in the same fog he has been in since Thanksgiving. My mother has been on a rollercoaster of depression and anger ever since. I always waffle on what to do with the suicide threats from one or the other of them. It s...
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pixel04
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3
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849
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What to say at Holiday Time
(Preview)
I am seeking advice on how to handle a sister, who has been struggling with alcoholism for several years, at the holidays. Almost 2 years ago, after an intervention, my sister went to rehab and was sober for only a few months following. Things have gotten progressively worse again and now she has falle...
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LostDux
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6
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1007
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Setting Boundaries..and having a difficult time saying no
(Preview)
Hello all...
Does this sound familiar the not being able to say no? and the difficulty of setting boundaries??
Yes this is what we are afraid of,or at least I am. I have soo much trouble saying no let it be something so little as not wanting to go to the store. I feel guilty every time I say no.w...
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Lauren ashley
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7
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602
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Too Much Rain - Song Lyrics
(Preview)
Hi Everyone,
I heard this song yesterday, and it just made me feel good, hopeful!  Thought I would share the lyrics with you.
Laugh when your eyes are burnimg, Smile when your heart is filled with pain
Sigh as you brush away tomorrow, Make a vow, That it's not going t...
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david62
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2
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673
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Listening
(Preview)
I have been listening to a lot of people lately who give me different views on addicts and ACOAs and I am thankful. I feel like my HP is talking to me through them. Some of the things that people have told me (I'm writing them out because it makes me absorb them better that way):
1. He stopped...
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Cyn
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4
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756
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Understanding Alcoholism (some adult content)
(Preview)
I think I have a pretty good understanding of alcoholism. What I'm having trouble understanding is the "sober alcoholic," and I'm not to the point yet where I feel like I can trust my own instincts.
My boyfriend is 15 years sober, we've been seeing eachother for about 6 months. We have a...
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Jane Avril
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14
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940
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I read this every morning
(Preview)
A Prayer at the Beginning of the Day
O, Higher Power, allow me to greet the coming day in peace. Help me in all things to rely upon Your holy will, In every hour of the day, reveal Your will to me. Bless my dealings with all who surround me. Teach me to treat all that comes to me throughout the d...
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kitty
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4
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508
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I must remember Alcoholism is progressive....
(Preview)
I committed to God that I would not run away from my marraige. I promised him that I would follow what I beleive he has guided me to do. I shall ask for strength, guidance, and patience to make it through each progression of the disease.
I beleive with all my heart that God has a great...
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captcodee
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6
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714
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Should I take him back?
(Preview)
I am relatively new to this site. I've been tooling around the message boards and in the chat room the last several days. My husband is an alcoholic. I've never had that much of a problem dealing with it as I've been associated with one alcoholic or another my entire life. (My...
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marie_h
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8
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588
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What is compassion......
(Preview)
Someone shared with me today something along the lines that they felt that compassion was letting someone suffer the natural consequences of their actions, and to not do things for them that they should be doing themselves.
I liked that concept. I was curious to see what the dictionaries said.
...
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bobump
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4
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3405
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Need Alt Chair on Wednesdays
(Preview)
Due to an increasingly hectic schedule, I am no longer able to co-chair on Wednesday nights with my friend David. I apologize for the inconvenience, but I know that there are many members out there who are eager to provide service to the group. Thanks to one and all!
Cara ("Cabecka")
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cabecka
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1
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592
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Setting Boundaries (the Haxi script)
(Preview)
I don't think Haxi would mind me sharing this script here as I have it taped to my wall, folded in my prayer book... he allowed/asked me to put it in the ch rm last night, so here it is again:
6 Guidelines for Setting Boundaires
1) Have clearly defined expectations.
2) Clearl...
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kitty
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1
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686
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He's getting violent now
(Preview)
His drinking has escalated and he is getting violent. Is this typical progression of the addiction?
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ditto
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13
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799
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Just a quick thanks....
(Preview)
To those that reponded to the poem I wrote in the thread (which this post will bump to page 2 , LOL) .
I enjoy writing them, whey are part of my ESH. It's nice to have found that outlet again but even better to have people to share them with. And I really appreciate the feedback given on what you get out of t...
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bobump
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4
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517
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I could use some ESH
(Preview)
I have been having a lot of ups and downs. I have had a couple of good days but then the bad days overtake me. On those bad days, I have trouble applying the principles of this program, changing the old tapes to new and getting out of my own head. I become so totally overwhelmed that things become meaningles...
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sandie123
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8
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788
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Something wrong with chatroom??
(Preview)
I've been trying for 20 minutes to get back online - is there something wrong with the chatroom????
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Cyn
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2
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674
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Group Conscience Meeting
(Preview)
Group Conscience Meeting
December 7, 2005, 7pm EST
Chair: SenoraBob Co-Chair: Cabecka Secretary: David62
Agenda Items
General Opening of Meeting followed by:
Old Business
1.Approval of Minutes - November Business Meeting...
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bob6502
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1
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599
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winning @ losing, thanks
(Preview)
Thanks for your feedback guys... it is just so hard, seems like each week or day there is more junk I have to let go of, whether he is using or not, I don't care but knowing he doesn't love my mother & I, won't leave... goes out of town to see his g/f & she left her husband & 3 year old d...
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kitty
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4
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538
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Laughter to lift my mood
(Preview)
Hi roomies,
I love to laugh, and laughter is very healing for me. A good friend sent this to me, and I really needed it today! As you can tell some numbers are missing, I didn't want to offend anyone, so I deleted some. If anyone wants the full version just let me know and I will PM it to you. Hope this gives e...
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Dolphin123
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1
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666
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My baby is still home!!
(Preview)
My baby is still home. I haven't let him out of my sight. I'm afraid if I turn around his dad will come and grab him. I did have to stop staring at him though, he said I was giving him the creeps. He is ten and my daughter is eight. Their dad did call me and said he was taking me t...
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Powerless
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3
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870
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Taking time to appreciate how far we have come...
(Preview)
I got a private message from a special person today..That person got me thinking...I thought about how all of us have our issues with family,and some of us have it bad,and other have it worse,but we are all here for one reason..because we care about that a...As much as we deny it,and try to shov...
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Lauren ashley
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4
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508
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Im scared, in tears - cancer sucks!
(Preview)
My older brother had breast cancer 5yrs ago. Recently his calcium bloodwork came back elevated. The doctors checked with thyroid & parathyroid which came back okay. They are doing a bone scan tomorrow.
"A" husband had his left kidney removed this past August due to cancer. His ctscans showed...
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Barbara
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6
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873
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the continual calls
(Preview)
from my A are sad. Last night he called again. He had gone to a meeting and was feeling down about everything he has done. There was a speaker who was discussing his marriages and my A was (again) saying that he doesn't want to be one of "those" men who are on their second or third wives. (he sai...
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Kim
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4
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825
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Now I'm angry and frustrated
(Preview)
Today is one of those days I think I will pack a bag and move into the rooms and never leave. My step-father called me and said that my ex called him and threatened to press charges. Supposedly the school called him today and asked if it was okay for my to pick my son up and he didn't think much of...
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Powerless
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3
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791
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JOHN THANKS
(Preview)
JOHN THANKS SO MUCH FOR PUTTING THIS SITE TOGETHER. IT HAS HELPED ME SO MUCH. I HAVE MEET ALOT OF GOOD PEOPLE THAT HAVE HELP ME SO MUCH.
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nycbt
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2
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531
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Let the drinking roll off my back
(Preview)
My "a" and I finally were able to go out Saturday evening. Of course he wanted to see a band at one of the local pavillon's, I agreed because I'm trying to have more of an open mind about the things that are important to him. The band was great, I really enjoyed the music and being around people...
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twinmom2
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2
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508
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Digging underneath my anger
(Preview)
Hi all,
I feel I made a break through this morning with understanding what happens to me physically and emotionally when my "a" and I fight. I used the good old dictionary to differentiate between a discussion and a fight. A fight is described as a battle. I thought about this wor...
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twinmom2
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2
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865
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Does H in HP also stand for harmony?
(Preview)
Hello friends,
I think the founders of Alanon really knew what they were doing. Busy with step 4, I have often wondered why step 1, 2, and 3 were not 10, 11, and 12 because they were the hardest for me. In fact, I am still working on them, but decided I had to move on.
Anyway,on Step 4, I real...
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toto12
|
1
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528
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I Hate Losing
(Preview)
This disease makes me feel liike I am losing a battle... i really hate it & it sucks.
A horrbile, trauma drama.
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kitty
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4
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672
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K.I.S.S.
(Preview)
"Keep it Simple, Stupid!"
I laughed when I first heard this. Then, before I knew it, it became the slogan I use every day.
I think there is a tendency to get used to the situation I am in. Like the frog that doesn't notice that the water around him is boiling - it gets hotter gradually and he doesn't...
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pixel04
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3
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2555
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Please take the time to check this out
(Preview)
http://i.euniverse.com/funpages/cms_content/2529/4candles.swf
|
txmom
|
5
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578
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Reflection on another night alone
(Preview)
Hello Roomies,
Last night my "A" went out and used, he did not come home. He went to the neighbors and was there all night. For the past few weeks he and the kids and I have been taking the bus to drop them off at daycare and then I take the ferry with him. He goes to do his job search and I walk to work. Well he ca...
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Dolphin123
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2
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599
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Courage to Change - Dec 5
(Preview)
"If I can't recognize the love that already exists in my life, would I really appreciate receiving more? Let me acknowledge what has already been given to me."
I work in the childrens room of our town library. The kids are always so excited. I have a few personally close kids who love coming into my off...
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Barbara
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2
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718
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Making it through a fight with an alcoholic
(Preview)
Hello my friends.
As you may or may not know, I am married to an active alcoholic/addict.
We both know he is, he admits it, but is unwilling to get help. Thankfully through Alanon I have the courage to change the things I can, and the serenity to accept the things I can't.
Saturday was my comp...
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captcodee
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6
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569
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My baby is home!!!!
(Preview)
I did it! I finally brought my baby home. I drove for an hour and a hlaf this morning with knots in my stomch, but I picked him up from school. I asked him if he wanted to return home and he said yes. So here we are. I just can't stop staring at him. I know his dad isn't just goin...
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Powerless
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2
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744
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My Grown Up Christmas List
(Preview)
((((Friends))))),
One of my favorite Christmas songs. If you've never heard Amy Grant sing this, it's a beauty. I remind myself that Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year's are the Bermuda Triangle of the hurting heart. So I enjoy the small beauties and gifts that this season...
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Maria123
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5
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591
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Oil change instructions...made me laugh.
(Preview)
This is funny on soooo many levels whether you see your own behavior or that of your A's. I think it should read oil change instructions for Alanoner but I'll post as I received.
Oil Change instructions for Women:
1) Pull up to Jiffy Lube when the mileage reaches 3000 miles since the last oil cha...
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bobump
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5
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567
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Prayers Answered (weird story)
(Preview)
Forgive me for telling this story if you have already heard it(I think I told it in an online meeting once)---but I think it is such an amazing witness of my amazing HP.
This summer, my husband (my A) and I were at odds. He was using, unhappy, critical and just a joy to live with. One Friday nite in Augus...
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gknee
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6
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778
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Ignorance
(Preview)
In some ways what is currently happening in my life is a blessing. I lived my life as such a good girl, so innocent at times and believing in the good in all people. I went to a Christian HS and didnt really have my eyes open to the world of drugs and alcohol. I didnt have my first drink unt...
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Cyn
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4
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578
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feeling positive
(Preview)
Hi, I discovered this site about two weeks ago. I am so grateful for it, I have made 3 face to face meetings it feels good to concentrate on me for a change. My a even commented that I seem relaxed and he has no idea that I made the meetings. He's been up to his usual stuff and I feel hopeful for the first time in a...
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liliana
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5
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600
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I can be such a good friend.....
(Preview)
In some of my relationships it seems as I get closer, the more critical I've become. It's almost like I enter a comfort zone where I feel ok to criticize someone. I don't know why this happens short of that and it's something I need to find out some day, HP willing through working my program.
Maybe I un...
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bobump
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7
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601
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December 7th Group Conscience Meeting
(Preview)
Dear Friends,
We have a Group Conscience Meeting scheduled for 7pm Est on Wednesday, December 7th. As of this date our agenda is very limited. If you have issues, suggestions, ESH that you would like to have added to our meeting, please PM me either here on the message board or in the cha...
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bob6502
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2
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497
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prayer
(Preview)
I used to not pray about much of anything, so I was skeptical of prayer when I started this program a few years ago.
When I did decide to pray, I did so privately. I didn't want to share with anyone about my attempts to have a relationship with a Higher Power, or my attempts to let Him handle what I was t...
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pixel04
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3
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550
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Anticipation
(Preview)
I got this in an e-mail today. It fit well today since I have a second interview for a new job possibiliity.
I hope others can look forward to a positive New Year with new opportunities also. I know that these oppertunities can feel scary and make us not as excited as we may think we should feel... howe...
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sandie123
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3
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524
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I feel like I am losing myself
(Preview)
Not feeling so well these days... I am still having trouble finding or rather MAKING time for me.
My mother, is close to genius & still SO OCD, ADHD, ACOA & co-dependent on me to come & rescue her. I am tired of having ~ no life.
I think par...
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kitty
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4
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758
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Trying not to make a big deal of this
(Preview)
My husband got up our of the blue this evening and went to an NA meeting. I was very surprised and pleased. I tried not to make too big of a deal of it, but did tell him I am proud of him. He feels that he has to do certain things to make me happy so I won't leave again. He also knows that...
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Powerless
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4
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576
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helpful literature for daughter of suicide dad
(Preview)
 Hi Everyone
Can any of you guys reccommend a good book that i could give my niece to help her through the loss of her alcoholic father?
Her Dad (my brother) killed himself 10 days ago after an over-dose of booze and drugs. She is in her early 20`s with a young child of her own. She has lived...
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kiki
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6
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512
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You tell me...?
(Preview)
Always On Your Side - Sheryl Crow
My yesterdays are all boxed up and neatly put away But every now and then you come to mind Cause you were always waiting to be picked to play the game But when your name was called, you found a place to hide (When you knew that I was always on your side)
Well everything was...
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kismetstrand
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2
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677
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one small step
(Preview)
Okay..just had to tell someone about my small accomplishment. I kicked my husband out last tuesday..he showed up saturday morning wanting to talk.So i let him in and we had a long discussion on his problem.I told him he could come back but don`t he dare drink here or come home after he`s been drinking.I...
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allison
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3
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637
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Promise Yourself
(Preview)
I have a bookmark on my desk next to my Just For Today Al-Anon one-- both of them are helping me get through some tough situations right now and I want to share the message of the one entitled Promise Yourself, in hopes that it will be helpful to you too.
PROMISE YOURSELF
To be so strong that nothing can...
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Emmie11
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3
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543
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Im glad I found AlAnon before the holidays
(Preview)
I feel alot calmer going into the holidays than I would usually.
|
Barbara
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1
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453
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I am drawn to the troubles of others
(Preview)
As we all are, I'm sure. I am always on one mission or another. My mother and son suffer from severe mental illness. I worked for mental health for several years before moving here and enjoyed it very much. THat has a lot to do with planning on psychiatric nursing. I fin...
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Powerless
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3
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626
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Need to get this off my back
(Preview)
I have a need to get this off my back, the only place i can talk about this is here, and I really need to get some peace.
Shortly before my husband and I split up a guy with a little boy moved in next door. His son is the same age as my daughter.
The weekend before I split up with my husband Doug (my neig...
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captcodee
|
5
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643
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Pity Party for me today
(Preview)
I am feeling so down today. I miss my big kids. I know that they have made their decision not to return home with me when I returned to my husband and know that they have a right to their own decision. They're 8 and 10, what do they know? Obviously more than me. What i...
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Powerless
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4
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533
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Thank u 4 here
(Preview)
Hi 2 all,
I can hardly see this screen
except I can see it.
as good as I can, so on we go!
My good fortune is to have an
awareness increase which allows
me to unplug from them hill
billy a types - and to walk with
out a word of discontent ant 2 b
able 2 forgive as I go.
Just forgive - l g - l g - so
...
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wille
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1
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529
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another day well spent
(Preview)
So, my Christmas tree is up.....listening to "Rat Pack Christmas" I celebrated my first tree alone. It was sad at times but for the most part I enjoyed the fact that I did it all myself. My A called during dinner. Wanted to know if we were ever going to see each other again. I really didn't knowwhat to say.&...
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Kim
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4
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728
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A sad note!
(Preview)
Hello all,
I got this at work this morning hope it makes you all smile!
Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community.
The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly....
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Dolphin123
|
3
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522
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Sad when I should be ecstatic (sp?)
(Preview)
Well as of today my life has completely taken a different path and I should be jumping for joy - but instead I am bawling my eyes out in exhaustion, frustration and being overwhelmed.
I bought a swim school today - my own business. My own opportunity to build my life and make a name for myse...
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Cyn
|
5
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649
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Ruined sobriety redux
(Preview)
Hi, everyone.
I really need some help. And a big pity party, sorry.
Back in August I posted about my husband's abuse of Robitussin (after being clean and sober, at least I "think" so, for several years).
Since then my life has been in a horrible downward spiral.
I'd asked h...
|
phoebemoonpie
|
8
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636
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manipulations and boundaries
(Preview)
This weekend has been busy. Went out with friends Friday night, yesterday I got up and started cleaning/decorating for Christmas. It was hard and I knew it would be....going through our Christmas stuff, stockings with everyone's names on it (my A, my stepdaughter, my dog who passed in...
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Kim
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8
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595
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