I read this wonderful book last night. It is by Jeanet Geringer Woititz, author of Adult Children of Alcoholics.

The name of the book is "Marriage on the Rocks, Learning to Live with yourslef and an Alcoholic."

The book is amazing. I felt like the author was sitting in the room talking one on one with me. It is full of Alanon Principals and practical uses and explanations for them.

I have read so many shares with concerns and guilt over our children. What our A's and us are doung and have done to them. I know all too well the guilt that can be felt about the kids. I think we all want to protect them and at times blame oursleves for letting them be born into this.

The author makes a statement that the damage done to a childs self concept in an alcoholic home is reversable. She goes on to say that our children may be better off for having lived with Alcoholism. She then says yes I did say that. She says it goes along hte same lines as a person saying that if they had not married an alcoholic, they would not be the person they are today.

She says she has heard children at Alateen meetings stand up and say, "We are the survivors", and they don't just mean among children of alcoholics.

She said parents who are working a program, experience self growth and self aawareness that others might not find. That they become more aware and informed about proper parenting skills. How important it is to love and bring up your children, and not let them bring themelves up.

She continues on to speak of how children can become stronger by facing the dificulties that they face and dealing with them head on. That by dealing with adversity they appreciate the good things. That by using the tools of Alateen they grow stronger in their lives with other children, peers, teeachers stc. Not just the alcoholic. That they learn to own their problems and not deal with the petty jabs of other children. They learn their true worth.

They learn to love without strings and to rejoice in each others developement without expectations.

She says as a family we can learn to experience the adventure of life, both together and alone. She says that if the right things are done the disease can make us aware of how preciouse a healthy family is. If there was no alcoholism in the family, we might have continued on unaware, and missed the opportunity.

The book puts a positive spin on something we cannot change, that our children where born into alcoholism. Then we can decide what to do from there.

There is a section on what we can do to help them, as well as things not to do. Then there are quotes from kids about what they want, what has and can help them.

It is a wonderful book.

                               Love Jeannie