The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
And it felt real good. I even went before I went to work. They told me not to make any big decisions (like kicking him out) for a while, unless of course it's dangerous for me. They said leaving when he drinks is okay for me since it allows me to step away from the situation and I am less likely to try to control him. They also told me to pray and God will take care of it. Vince said he was quitting drinking this week, but with no support or therapy. I have my doubts, but I will try to have faith. If I bug him about what he is not doing, that will negate any of his efforts. I also started reading "How Alanon Works", it was strange because the page I opened up, the very first one, was a lady's story called "Reasons To Live." It was me, from the suicide attempts and everything else she felt. I think that was a sign. The meeting today was about step seven. I know I am not ready for that step, but I like the idea of it. Thank you guys for your kind words and thoughtful gestures. I am going to another meeting tomorrow nigth and hopefully there will be more people there. I feel I need to get a sponsor ASAP...
Congrats on going to a meeting Evilynn - sounds like you met with a great group of people. Faith is a great thing, but it doesn't come all at once, so be easy on yourself and keep coming back :) It will come.
I had a similar experience with stumbling on literature that spoke to me right from the start. For me it was the book From Survival to Recovery, which tells the stories of adult children of alcoholics. That book kept me coming back in the beginning, and I still love to read it. Which was good, because I didn't have faith in a heck of a lot back then ;) Best of luck on your journey!
That is great that you went, and even better that you enjoyed it so.
I only do 2 f2f regularly during the week. One of those is a Step Meeting. When I joined they were on Step 3 I think. Sure I know I'm not there but you can already get ideas as to where the other steps are leading. I get alot of great ideas from these meetings for my inventory, which I'm no where near starting.
Welcome.
Bob
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You are a perfect child of God and God and I love you just the way you are! (added by me...in that special alanon way)
That is great that you went, and even better that you enjoyed it so. I only do 2 f2f regularly during the week. One of those is a Step Meeting. When I joined they were on Step 3 I think. Sure I know I'm not there but you can already get ideas as to where the other steps are leading. I get alot of great ideas from these meetings for my inventory, which I'm no where near starting. Welcome. Bob
What was also wonderful is that I didn't feel ashamed or bad about myself for the first time in a long time. I guess it was strength in numbers.
It is amazing when your HP speaks to us and we notice! Signs are everywhere if we acknowledge and accept them. My A has been clean and sober 18 days! He too is doing it on his own, no counseling no meetings. It bothered me at first, but I know that it is him that needs to figure out what works for him. He has stopped defending his right to drink. He has acknowledged that he was wrong to hurt me (not physically hurt me) He is working on what he thinks he needs. I told him when he announced that he had, had his last drink. "If you can't do it alone there is pleanty of resources available" I have since let it go. The seed is planted and I still have so much work to do on myself. We are living each day, one day at a time. Be good to yourself, be gentle with yourself, watch for signs, learn to be grateful, these are the things that have helped me.
You should be proud of yourself. That first meeting is such a big step.
Faith and hope are wonderful. You don't have to have it for your A, have it for yourslef and your HP. If you keep hoping and keep praying, good things will happen.
