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My A falling into depression every time he is alone for extended periods.
(Preview)
Hi I'm new to the programme and have gotten as far as Step 3. I have been with my A for over 14 years in this time he's had one relapse but the problems continue. I don't live in my home country and cannot attend meeting in English. Finding this site has been a godsend. My A organised some long overdue counse...
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CurleySue
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9
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478
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using Al-Anon tools
(Preview)
This board has been my lifesaver. As some of your may know, my alcoholic BF has had another slip. He was sober for 3 months without a program. He has been drinking for 2 weeks now every third day. Its been a real challenge for me to work my program. Yesterday, I finally had enough! He had sat up all night talk...
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joker
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5
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503
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Husband is an alcoholic. Sober for 93 days and relapsed. I am pissed, how do I handle it?
(Preview)
Hi-- My husband has been an alcoholic for 20+ years and finally decided to get treatment. He was back to his old was last night and got drunk and bought a bunch of random people drinks (bill was over $300). I am so pissed and hurt that I am shaking. I get it that people are human and make mistakes, but how a...
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augrads
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7
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7950
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So we just watch our A commit slow suicide
(Preview)
How can we just stand by and watch it happen?
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lgnutah
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8
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530
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Courage to Change 1-31-2016
(Preview)
The C2C reading for January 31 speaks about having our "shortcomings" being removed. as we move to Step 6 and Step 7. It points out that we can do all we can to prepare for them to be removed by developing a nonjudgmental awareness of ourselves, accept what we discover and become willing t...
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hotrod
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3
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444
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I apologize
(Preview)
I apologize for leaving in the middle of a meeting this morning. My girlfriend and I had our wires crossed and she was on her way to pick me up. I wasnt sure what to do so I just left but I think I forgot to log out.
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KathRN
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4
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702
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what can i expect from my recovering alcoholic boyfriend?
(Preview)
Hello, I'm new to this forum, i came on here because i'm looking for some advice from other people that may have been in my position before. I have been dating a lovely man for 6 years, i wasn't aware initially that he was an alcoholic. He told me 2 years into the relationship. From that point onwards i enco...
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Happy Girl
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5
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2433
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Alcoholic Mother
(Preview)
She texted me in the middle of December. It was the first time I've heard from any of them in nearly 3 years. I'm going along pretty smoothly and then bam, my head explodes. I'm so angry that I even responded. I want to reconcile but I also know that if I go back it will be the same patterns over again because t...
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StargazerLily
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5
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555
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hi all
(Preview)
As i was posting a reply to someone else,s post I realized that there was something i wanted to share. I suggested in my reply to give themselves a break over emotional reactions because they are doing things differntly now. As i have been trying to adjust to my new life, i have been sqelching alot of sadn...
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YARNCRAZY
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2
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387
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Courage to Change 1-30-2016
(Preview)
The C2C reading for January 30 speaks about the difficulties of living with the disease of alcoholism. It points out that many times plans change at a moments notice and rules get broken. Al-Anon shows me a new way to approach these difficulties. I can live one day at a time. I can make my choices of what...
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hotrod
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1
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361
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My Brother Is Drinking Himself To Death
(Preview)
Hello out there in Alanon world. Here is my story.... My oldest brother is drinking himself to death. He has been a heavy drinker/alcoholic for the better part of 45 years. Obviously, as this is a progressive disease, he hasn't always been in the condition he is now. But about a year ago, he was di...
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Wiggity
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8
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1805
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Vivitrol for Alcoholism
(Preview)
Has anyone known someone that's tried this?
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frustrationshigh
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2
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506
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Courage to Change reading 1-29-2016
(Preview)
The C2C reading for January 29, speaks about "self-expression." It points out that upon attending Al-Anon meetings, we discover how important it is to give voice to our feelings. We need to be very careful how we do this, as there is a huge difference between "expressing ourselv...
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hotrod
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3
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701
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Reliazation that my picker is broken
(Preview)
I went to an al-anon meeting last night and read afterwards and I had an awaking moment afterwards. I realized that every man that I had gotten into a serious relationship with and lived with not only all alcoholics but have the same issues. I need to go home. I need to go home. They are not from the city I...
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joker
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3
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662
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Final straw
(Preview)
Well, I've just had the final straw!! AD went on a binge tonight with my grandson's truck that my husband left to him when he passed. Grandson just turned 18. The truck is still in my name. The title was mailed to me around the time my hubby passed and I can't find it anywhere. I need to apply for a lost titl...
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KathRN
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3
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600
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this is all new to me and i don't know what to do
(Preview)
I have been in a relationship with an A, who also has anxiety issues. he does not drink every day, or every weekend. but when A does drink, there is no stopping. and he is verbally abusive to me. it has never gotten physical. and afterwards, there are apologies, presents, promises of never doing it again...
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sally1984
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6
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662
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New to this- opinions of my situation please?
(Preview)
I realize that I'm the only one who can know what decision is right for me, but I would just like some outside thoughts on my situation. I went to my first Al-Anon meeting last night but didn't feel like talking at the time. I've been talking extensively with my friends and family that have experience wit...
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cc123
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4
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531
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God's timing vs my own...how to know
(Preview)
Hello all...Itâs been a while since Iâve posted as Iâve been riding out the current storm that Iâm currently in and just trying to take in all of the ESH on the boards to get through this. Iâm having trouble in my spirit with carrying out a decision that I made to file for legal separation from my AH. I m...
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Hopefull15
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4
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571
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Death of a loved one
(Preview)
I'm back,I'm working the steps also still at 1st step in path,and doing the Ctc,and one day at a time ,ftf meetings are in next town over and I'm got night blindness so I'm still working on trying to find someone to carpool with cause I really need ft for.reason I'm here today is that my abf mom passed away l...
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lookingup
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4
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544
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Step 2
(Preview)
Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! Step 2 has been posted to the Step Work Board . Please join in and share your thoughts. Here is the address http...
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hotrod
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1
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536
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C2C Reading 1-28-2016
(Preview)
The C2C reading for January 28 points out that many of us come to Al-Anon for a quick fix for our pain. and that many of us stayed because of the consistency, security and friendship that we find each day and because of our commitment to our growth. The reading suggests that it Is important to see recove...
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hotrod
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2
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446
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Finding a sponsor
(Preview)
hi! At my face to face meeting today we talked about step 12 (courage to change from yesterday) and it was a great discussion but I noticed everyone has a sponsor. The thought of this terrifies me. I want a sponsor, but how do I find one? What if they reject me? (I have a pretty bad fear of rejection and socia...
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Fairlee
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4
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5038
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I Wanna Be a Kid Again...
(Preview)
So - some of you know that I have a lovely Aunt, 83 years old, who went from independent living 2.5 weeks ago to Hospice today. There is no obvious or apparent reason that she's declined other than her body is just giving out in a general way. In my immediate family, I am the only one left in the area of our u...
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Iamhere
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26
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823
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Struggling with boring and normal!
(Preview)
Funny, how I'll always find something to complain about, ugh. I have been dating my new guy for nearly 10 months. Everything is fine on the surface but I struggle with the normalcy of our relationship. No drama, no major issues (except that I think he's not a verbal guy when he expresses himself and h...
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andromeda
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15
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862
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New to this - 2 meetings in one day?
(Preview)
I'm totally new to this, and haven't found a home group or sponsor yet. I've had an extremely hard day, and feel like I need to try and listen to as many stories for help as I can. There are two meetings in my area that are close in proximity and timed right. Is there any benefit to trying to go to both? Hel...
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marniep222
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13
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655
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When I'm tired I'm a mess
(Preview)
I have been struggling with sleep on and off for a couple of years now. Sunday night I did not get much sleep at all. I got 4 hours tops and I woke up and went to work a groggy mess. I felt awful, and grumpy, and dissatisfied and like my life was miserable. My AH and I have had some of the worst arguments whe...
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KT2015
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4
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615
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Rock Bottom
(Preview)
I dont wish to continually post problems here, I am new and wish to move forward with step one... Came home from work to witness alcoholic daughter (nearly 20) needlessly bullying younger daughter in front of friends (again!) For the fist time I asked daughter and friends to leave: in the past I have t...
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Pearlgirl
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4
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663
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Lies, Lies and Loss of Memory
(Preview)
AH got a final reprimand from work so might be losing his job (28 years with the company and 5 years from retiring). He says he didn't do anything wrong and his boss hates men. Really.... I've noticed lately he keeps asking me the same questions over and over again. The alcohol abuse must be impacting...
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NeedPeace
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3
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680
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Courage to Change 1-27-2016
(Preview)
The C2C reading for January 27 speaks about self-pity and martyrdom. It points out that many times we read, or interpret a meaning into another's action that is not true. We need to learn to take things at face value and stop translating others actions or motives. . The quote is from One Day at a time in...
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hotrod
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8
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584
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There is no solution and I have no control
(Preview)
It's never ending. In October, after the last drinking time which resulted in no job, no home, no money, no girl friend and baby, 38 year ld A son tried living on the street for a few days. He didn't like it. My sister offered him her couch in NYC. He is on probation. He set up a program that included 5 days a we...
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laurab
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6
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605
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I am so grateful yet angry
(Preview)
I finally took some action. I called the bank and since the mortgage is only in his name, my credit rating will not be affected and if the house sells I have half of the value. I did a stupid thing and called him. He was with her at her place and I got into a heated argument with him and her. I was so mad, I shook li...
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joker
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1
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452
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Clarity
(Preview)
Since my last update, I have been working on focusing on myself. Its been great. The ex-ABF went on another drunk after sleeping for 2 days. He contacted his ex-wife and met her and said he is not coming home tonight. I said good, I do not have to listen to lies and drunk talk all night. She can listen to you...
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joker
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4
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780
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Nervous about f2f alanon
(Preview)
Hey everyone! So I'm looking into face to face meetings and am a bit nervous. I will have to keep it secret from my spouse, which I don't love but it is what it is. He's attended AA about 7 years ago and absolutely couldn't stand it. So, to go to my own meetings will be a challenge but I think I found some early m...
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MollyOwl27
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14
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559
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Guilt and intimacy with the AH
(Preview)
Hello - I just found this forum on Monday and have tried to implement some of the ideas to remove the crazy and try to find peace. I'm struggling with intimacy and have been for the last 7 years but the hardest times have occurred over the last year. I can't seem to move past the thoughts in my head. I can't...
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NeedPeace
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10
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737
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connecting
(Preview)
Hi all. . Its been awhile and ive found myself thinking i need to connect and update and well, process. If you have "followed" me at all you know ive been married to an alc for 17 yrs and have one 11 year child. Ihave also come to realize that my stbex is also a narcissist and that the combination h...
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Theoceancalls
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8
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537
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18 Things Mentally Strong People Do
(Preview)
I saw this and thought, this is us working the program!!! {{HUGS}}
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Debb
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6
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758
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Hope for Today Jan 26
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Today's reading is about seeing the good and showing gratitude rather than dwelling on the negative. For those of us who have lived or are living with active As, it is easy enough to become mired in resentments and just be blind with anger toward our As. This reading is a remind...
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yanksfan51
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7
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559
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New and very much in need of help
(Preview)
im new here. My name is Kathy and I'm the mother of a 36 year old binge alcoholic daughter, who has 5 kids and has made bad choices all of her life, for which I have always paid the price. I hope that I am able to write this post, and am not breaking any rules here. I have a very long story, which I will share lat...
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KathRN
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10
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890
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Courage 1-26-16
(Preview)
In my heart I pray that those who have suffered as a result of someone else's drinking and using, have the tool of our literature as the world-wide fellowship is represented along with their ESH. Page 26 speaks from that writers miracle of recovery which has so definitely displayed my own. My God...
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Jerry F
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3
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555
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Dreaming of summer
(Preview)
I am not in a good place right now, struggling with a family situation that is too painful for words and winter. My water lines froze and busted, I have been without water for several days. still looking for a car I can afford.I guess all of these things are wearing me down, I am feeling quite defeated. I...
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mjferg
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7
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425
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Would Love to Have Input on Gossip
(Preview)
Hey there MIP family!!! I just remembered that I am to chair our local F2F meeting on Wednesday. The topic is gossip. I am very distracted by events in my real life so would love to draw upon you all to get some input. What I do know that I intend to share is that gossip is considered one of three obstacles...
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Iamhere
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12
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1373
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Sponsor?
(Preview)
Hi,I am a wife of a drug and alcohol addict. for years I have tried to help him quit,I finally realize that is just not going to happen,I have 3 kids with him.i am hurt,I am not he same person that I once was and I hate it,I feel like I let his actions,his addiction change me in a way I'm no longer happy with my l...
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Florph
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6
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516
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Growth & Graditude to You & HP :)
(Preview)
Hello MIP Family :) Sorry its Been So Long, but I Was Sitting here thinking of my "Al-Anon/MIP" Blessings and I Realized a Few things and want to come here to Share them... :D When I Landed Here Just over 7years ago, I was a Complete Train Wreck, this was My 1st Stop MIP :D within a Couple weeks yo...
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Jozie
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12
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760
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Obsessing about money and paying the bills
(Preview)
So my mother told me yesterday we shouldn't obsess over money. if you and your family have good health that's all that matters right? Well yes health is a biggy but so is paying your rent and feeding and clothing your children. A little background for those of you who don't know: I work full time. I was lu...
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Yankeerose
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24
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686
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Life Can be Sweet & Bitter
(Preview)
I find that gratitude interrupts anxiety!! {{HUGS}}
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Debb
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11
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798
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Blizzard and Active Alcoholic - Help!
(Preview)
I've posted a few times before. My AH has cirrhosis and was initially sober for over 2 years. The alcohol is back. I thought as recently as a week ago that it was an isolated incident, but it wasn't. I've been going to Al Anon since right after that happened and it has been a Godsend. I'm still new and do not y...
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ShellyM
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15
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793
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Courage to Change Reading 1-25-2016
(Preview)
The Courage to Change reading for January 25 speaks about liking the drama and the excitement of crisis in other people's lives, and ignoring our own life. By coming into Al-Anon we are encouraged to keep the focus on ourselves,talk about ourselves and not anybody else. Many of us discover that we...
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hotrod
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9
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883
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Alcohol Police...
(Preview)
I have been the alcohol police for 11 years. It is a thankless job, stressful, no benefits and the pay is low. I have decided to quit this job. I gave my two weeks notice last week.Over the years I have gone to F2F meetings for Al-anon and also AA, online meetings, read books, read message boards, etc. ...
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Jen61
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11
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838
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Milestone day :-)
(Preview)
Well daughter turned the big 13 today and we did just as we pleased without being beholden to anyone and, it was lovely  This time last year we were staying at my mothers with no fixed address and the stress of it all had us both pretty downcast. The year before we stayed with mother at her beach house and...
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missmeliss
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10
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673
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Moment of clarity
(Preview)
So Friday I had a moment of clarity. I have been racking my brain and resources trying to figure out what to do for my ABF as his birthday is this week. But then I thought about my birthday this past year and how I was so disappointed. My ABF was in jail on my bday so I decided to go visit him and supersize him as I...
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ItsAllAboutMeMC
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12
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769
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Struggling today
(Preview)
Today I am visiting family and I am struggling with the memories of our life in better times. I say better times but they really were not better. My AH and I are living separately because my life living with him became unmanageable. There were his vices which were first alcohol, then grass and who knows w...
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pjwa12726
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8
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532
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How to let go
(Preview)
Lately these days she's full of plans and they always change. Its just crazy. Found this on another members page, and can I relate. He is full of plans now and its always changing. Its just crazy. I can so relate. But how do you let that go? I need to let what he says go as his plans are forever changing. I just...
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joker
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7
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842
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Now that he's out of our home
(Preview)
Our alcoholic son, who we no longer allow to live here, still receives mail at our house. Spouse and I talked it over, and we're going to try to convince AS to get a post office box and change his address. We are willing to pay for six months' box rent up front to cut this tie he has with our home. He comes to get...
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Foothold
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11
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832
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Courage to Change Reading 1-24-2016
(Preview)
The C2C reading for January 24 speaks about being honest with ourselves and with others. It points out that we do not have to pretend to feel what we do not feel or want things that we do not want. It suggests that Al-Anon does not tell me how to behave and does not legislate right or wrong choices. It si...
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hotrod
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8
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512
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face to face meeting
(Preview)
i finally went to the Alanon meeting near my new place. It had a differnt but good vibe there. It was at 8pm so i took the bus and found the place despite anxiety. The meeting was a candlelight one. I had never attended a candle light meeting. With the lights so low, many people shared their pain and their ho...
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YARNCRAZY
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2
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424
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Stormy weather in the Southern hemisphere!
(Preview)
I understand there's some blizzard conditions for many members right now, where I live it's summer but our family had it's own storm today.. Firstly found a stash of marijuana daughter had hidden.. then daughter and AH had a screaming match over financial information my daughter was refusing to sha...
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Pearlgirl
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5
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634
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Unsure I belong here
(Preview)
I dont even know if this is where i need to be so I apologize in advance I am not being directly affected by someone drinking. What is happening is my boyfriend of 2 months is in AA. I met him almost a year into sobriety. I have been trying my best to help support him even tho I dont understand what the AA 12 ste...
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bedroomeyez39
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6
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577
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Sick of the drinking
(Preview)
I am new here and am so worn down by my husband and daughter's drinking.. Over Christmas I witnessed my university aged daughter, who was on holiday with us, daily binge drinking with friends, whilst my husband would of an evening sink enough beer/gin to anaethetise himself comfortably and talk in re...
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Pearlgirl
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7
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644
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Trying to focus on myself but it's hard
(Preview)
In March it will be 2 yrs that I have been dating my A boyfriend. I knew with him being 15 yrs older there would be differences but he just seems to be changing so fast. I know some of it can be related to his ptsd and depression but I feel some he could have better control and try to get a more positive attitude....
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catlover26
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14
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746
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Courage to Change Reading 1-23-2016
(Preview)
The C2C reading for January 23 speaks about Step Three. This is the Step where we are asked to make a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood him. The reading points out that this is a huge decision. It helps to work the Steps in order because the order in which the fi...
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hotrod
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4
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731
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