Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Conflicted · Conflicted

Hi Everyone, I was wondering if anyone could explain what acting "as if", looks like in action/real life? I read this today, Perhaps we feel 12 years old, instead of 42. To consciously behave like a responsible 42-year-old is out of the question. Acting "as if", is the next best thing, the program te...

Conflicted · Conflicted

Curious does AlAnon have any literature approaching this related to within meetings? Are there official guidelines related to cross talk? -- Edited by Conflicted on Friday 18th of January 2019 12:33:56 AM

Conflicted · Conflicted

Hi, Where can answers to these questions be found in our literature? (TIA)What is AlAnon's position on members bringing kids fundraisers for schools, bands, sports, etc..in to meeting rooms before, during and after meetings? What is AlAnon's position on members bringing in home business ite...

Freetime · Freetime

Last night at my home group meeting, we had a newcomer, and this was only her second meeting. She is trying to understand what Al-Anon is all about. She asked a question, "So, is the meaning of this program that we can all become better people?" I thought that was a great way of looking at us. What do you a...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is a description of acceptance. The writer describes being given a stuffed toy that ultimately does a number on his/her self esteem because the child is told the gift was given because of his/her resemblance to the toy. Over time, and with the help of a sponsor...

mamalioness · mamalioness

I'm going up my work street getting ready to go into left lane and I see these really nice young ladies, stopped in the road and I look and its a gorgeous white husky doggie that they hit.....I stopped and asked if i could help lthem, call someone, just assist...They said they called animal services He wo...

JustForMeNow · JustForMeNow

For the past 6 months my husband has been in and out of detox and sober living. He only lived at home for about a week in October. We have 2 kids (7 and 11). He was a heavy drinker for a long time and I know that recovery will take a long time. Some days are good- he's happy, patient, and positive. Other days he...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading talks about the power of humility as we work the steps of recovery. The author shares that after working the program zealously for over a year, there was frustration over continued lapses into self-pity and resentment over the alcoholic's inability to give wanted emotional suppo...

Freetime · Freetime

Hello. MIP, and welcome to February! In today's reading, the author had stopped enabling an alcoholic, and then felt frustrated because the drinking didn't stop. They wondered what they had done wrong. Then they realized that they were still trying to control alcoholism and its symptoms. In Al-...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

My niece's daughter arrived this morning! I am over the moon! I don't know when I will see her but I am excited!

VickiR · VickiR

Hi MIP - I haven't written an update in a while, so here goes! My XAH has almost disappeared over the last 6 months - ever since he got his share of the house money he has been on a very quick downward spiral from alcoholism into drug addiction as well. I wrote a while ago discussing my struggle with the deci...

mamalioness · mamalioness

A Brother calls me today and I am driving home from work, so the bluetooth rings and I see its him.....I hit answer and we talk He told me a boat owner fired him "temporary layoff" he said because "I acted out while drinking" so I listen and he goes on to say that its "not my fault..the guys an A*****e!!!! ...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Life Happens. No matter who we are, where we are, how we are, life happens. It's taken me some time to recenter after my son's recent relapse. I am not 'perfect' nor did I desire to be so but I did find peace through this spiritual program. I even made multiple plans this coming week and was really exci...

norasq · norasq

I have written here over the last few weeks about the mix of emotions I've experienced when my ex-husband of 3 years (married 20, divorced 3 that is) announced that he was going to rehab over the month of December and did indeed go. I was surprised at the strength of emotions it brought up in me, a lot of whi...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! Today's reading in Courage to Change speaks to something very personal for me. The author shares that they learned, living with the impact of alcoholism, that plans could change at any moment and that rules varied accordingly. The author developed a mistrust of everyone and everythin...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

First off my instincts were right, I really just need to know I know what I know when I know and I knew something was way way off. This directly impacts me financially, my kids insurance and so on. I am soooo tired of this all at the moment. UGH. 7 blasted years we have been doing this and this is the year I...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT Reading for today, January 29 speaks about having compassion for others. It points out that compassion is supportive, and understanding and does not allow us to do for others what they can do for them selves. The reading suggests that the temptation to give advice or to jump into ano...

Dancer66 · Dancer66

So the 23 year year marriage has had bumps over the years. Marriage counseling in the past that did help. Now over the past 2-3 years things have really gotten rocky. Over the last 5 years is when alcohol by husband started to really increase, and that started a lot of his selfish behavior and lack of a...

Wolfie55 · Wolfie55

When I was young, so much younger than today, I wore glasses. When I ran with the local street gang, I stopped wearing glasses because it wasn't cool and after all, I was trying to pretend I was someone I wasn't to get people to like me. In my twenties, I started wearing them again, but twenty years later th...

Overcome · Overcome

I'm in the Meeting/Chat room if anyone would like to join me for a meeting. http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html Topic: Why do we keep coming back? (based on today's reading in Courage to Change) Overcomer -- Edited by Overcome on Monday 28th of January 2019 09:00:19 PM -- Edited by Overc...

wp · wp

What has become of MIP alanon meetings at 9 weekdays and 7 Sunday? I'm lost. wp

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for Monday, 1/28 asks the question, why do we keep coming back? One reason is that the writer doesnt want to underestimate the lasting impact that alcoholism has had on them. They can find themselves feeling things becoming unmanageable again if they do not practice recovery. They al...

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

It is so Spring-like her today in SoCAL, I just had to do a little tyding up around the house. In doing so, I FINALLY hung some of the art & wall decor I brought over from my previous life (slightly more than 1 year ago)... things that were important to me at the time, and still speak to me - either with col...

joker · joker

I have been working hard on my recovery with breaks in between so I do not get overwhelmed. I am accessing one on one therapy along with reading on line here and I had a break through. I have been dating two different type of men. One that is sober and does not drink and we get along very well and another that i...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- Todays reading describes different ways to find strength in the program when feeling overwhelmed, lonely, anxious or having difficulty staying in the present. The writer mentions the importance of meetings and phone calls in order to feel the support that is available. ...

Lyne · Lyne

Today my A is in a snit and guess what? I've decided to have a good weekend regardless. The sun is out, I am healthy, nobody has died, and I believe I can cope and have a good attitude. Thank you alanon! Lyne

Hbgchick · Hbgchick

Hi everyone, I'm new here and just I really want to talk about what's happening to me with people who have been there and done that. Well, when you hear the story I don't know that anyone has been exactly here, but at least some of you have maybe at least dealt with some form of this ridiculous situation tha...

TrishaNorth44 · TrishaNorth44

Pretty new here and for the most part I've been a lurker, absorbing everything I can about Alanon. I went to my 1st Alanon meeting five years ago, with pen and notebook in hand, eagerly waiting for all the experienced members to give me a checklist of how to get my son to stop drinking. Needless to say, I wa...

Freetime · Freetime

Today's reading in One Day At a Time in Al-Anon points out that we can't simply eliminate our faults. Forcing ourselves to stop a bad habit or compulsion doesn't work. We need to replace the defect with something better. Today's Reminder provides some examples: If I am morose and discontented, I wil...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! I usually post from Courage to Change, but I also keep that book in my office, and with all the snow we got, I can't get to it. (2 hours of shoveling, though! No need to hit the gym today, as it is still snowing, and I know I'll get the opportunity to shovel the driveway again later today.) Today'...

Nadinemel · Nadinemel

I am looking for some game ideas for our conference when we are gathering and between events. Any ideas please?

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading starts with a simple yet bold statement - I will dare to be myself. Six simple words that for me are a great way to start the day! The reminder tells us: I have a right to want what I want and to feel the way I feel. I may not choose to act on those feelings or desires, but I won't hide them from...

loranard · loranard

my name is Lora and my wife is an alcoholic. both of her parents are alcoholics and she also suffers from depression, ptsd, anxiety, and is disassociative. our relationship has been steadily going downhill since I would say...right after we got married in July. she blames me for everything. lit...

MelanieJ · MelanieJ

My daughter (sober 120 days on Jan 14th) was brought home tonight by a co-worker. She was drunk. Things have been going so well and we have been so grateful. She and her 5 year old live with me, the little one is at her other g-ma's tonight, thank God. Anyway, I lost it. Blame, shame, yelling and cryin...

Faintly Falling · Faintly Falling

I had a parent from the school call me to talk to me about how her daughter was upset by my daughter's name calling. My first reaction was to do whatever I could to improve my daughter's behaviour (they are both six) and to protect her daughter from further upset. My daughter is quite full on and, I believe...

JerryF · JerryF

In the 40+ years of recovery including being a therapist in a large in/out recovery program have seen this but once and that was this morning!! It blew me away when the cake pastry past before my eyes as the husband handed it to his recovering wife as she celebrated her 6th year of sobriety as I had to spe...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT Reading for today, January 22 speaks about trusting HP, through prayer and asking for guidance The reading suggests that the temptation to go it alone and force solutions is one of our frequent"go to" actions. I know that i always made up a solution, to my issues such as- deny realit...

Twinkies · Twinkies

The weekend started off on a bad note for me. I took something AH did (or rather, didnt do) personally. But I came and posted here, got my feelings out, and that by itself helped me to regain some perspective. The responses that followed from some of you helped even more and by the end of the evening, my min...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about how our recovery is directly affected by the amount of effort we put into it. The writer compares this to a student who may get by in school, but will have minimal results if the student makes a habit of skipping homework, staying up late, missing classes...

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for Monday, 1/21, discusses how the author was confused about what was their business, they felt they had to take care of everyone, and they could not pay attention to their own needs. Alanon helped them listen and learn to their own body, soul, and HP. They would check in with themself-h...

mamalioness · mamalioness

LET IT BEGIN WITH ME ***************************** Today, I was in a pissy mood...stuff going wrong, stuff coming at me that I didn't like and I tossed a temper tantrum that would scare the squirrrels out of the trees. AFTER I vented my spleen, hitting a busted ole keyboard on a chair and letting lo...

mamalioness · mamalioness

We treasure our "Serenity Prayer" because it brings a new light to us that can dissipate our oldtime and nearly fatal habit of fooling ourselves. In the radiance of this prayer we see that defeat, rightly accepted, need be no disaster. We now know that we do not have to run away, nor ought we again try t...

Twinkies · Twinkies

Its been a couple of months now that Ive been pretty consistent in the way I conduct myself in regards to AHs drinking. When I first made the decision to disengage a year ago, my actions were unpredictable and Im pretty sure AH never knew what to expect from me. I never knew what to expect from me either. It...

Twinkies · Twinkies

Ive come to the realization that I cant change my AH. Been working on accepting that for a while now and Im finally there. Im learning to disengage when hes been drinking (which is pretty much daily now) and doing a pretty good job at it too. Im learning to live my life for me and allow him to join in as he desi...

canadianguy · canadianguy

I was reading through some recent posts today, and one of the 'flavors' that comes up every so often is gender differences - real of perceived - within the rooms of Al-Anon. When I was attending meetings regularly, I lived in a small town of roughly 30,000 people, so there were four Al-Anon meetings ev...

Overcome · Overcome

Evening Meeting starting in chat room, follow this link to get in: http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html Topic: How to keep a positive attitude in the alcoholic home. -- Edited by Overcome on Friday 18th of January 2019 09:34:48 PM

mamalioness · mamalioness

Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves. --Carl Jung (1875 - 1961) The best portions of a good man's life, his little, nameless, unremembered acts, of kindness and love. --William WordsworthAlone we can do so little; together we can do so much. --Helen...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I'm really trying not to react vs respond to what's going on at the moment. If there was a middle finger emoji it would so be flying .. and I apologize I get a little to real with things at times. I am utterly dumbfounded at the moment for someone who "isn't drinking" .. "living a Christian life" the man i...

Freetime · Freetime

When starting out in Al-Anon, the author was disturbed to hear that the best way to help an alcoholic is to focus on ourselves. It seemed heartless to stop helping our loved ones. Then another member shared that our desire to help is compassionate, but our old ways of helping may not be helpful. If we d...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading talks about our own process of self-discovery using Al-Anon. The author discusses that perhaps searching from bar to bar, making scenes in public places and getting hysterical over little things is a bit insane. Often, we (friends and family) are the ones who agonize over the alc...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

OK.. I hope this will make you lol if you're not having a good day. Mine has been one of feeling powerless but just accepting it. So here goes.. I thought I might help the alcoholic in my life and myself to eat a little healthier. We both like desserts but they are often high fat and high sugar and we're beg...

Skorpi · Skorpi

In today's reading in Courage to Change, the author reflects on an important lesson they have learned in AlAnon - thinking before speaking. The author shares that they used to say everything that came to mind, even if they were not sure if what they said was true. Through work in the program, the autho...

joker · joker

As my dating life unfolds, the one man I had been dating, well last weekend, after 7 months of knowing him, he admitted to me he is an active alcoholic and said you can not leave any alcohol around my home as I will drink it. I was feeling a bit crazy and feeling a bit unstable being around him. I thought it was...

Iamhere · Iamhere

I am rarely at a loss for words, but find myself there tonight. The details are not important - I am. So often, we can get bogged down in the what happened and the summary is my son has relapsed. Of course, as the evidence presented last evening, my mind goes off to the races wondering how long has this be...

El · El

Hello MIP family, I am sure I have written before about the undeniable progression of my AH's disease. It is obviously taking its toll on him physically and cognitively. The times we can be out doing "normal" activities is getting shorter and shorter before he is ready to pass out or even somewhat en...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all Coming up 36 years in Alanon... I am blessed, truly blessed to be here... it was hard at first- and nothing seemed to happen. "now, if not sooner" seems to be the motto at that stage. I am 13 or 14 in this photo. A wee squirt. By age 20 I was 5'6"... This was our family home- our kitchen. I had gotten...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT Reading for today, January,15 speaks about the erroneous assumption that once the alcoholic reaches sobriety all our problems will be solved. The reading points out that this is an illusion. Sobriety is only the first step in building a good life. We both need to work to overcome the emo...

Temple · Temple

Went to see my Primary Care Physician this morning. This is funny--first one in 40 years and he's retiring in 2 months. I'd been seen by his nurse, and therefor contaminated before I ever got to talk to him, and he's this big teddy bear of a man who comes in beaming at me. And I broke down sobbing while he w...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about taking inventory, examining our behavior and participating in our own recovery. The writer describes meetings when a group inventory was taken. The writer felt impatient and anxious to get back to the meeting without the inventory. He/she began t...

Overcome · Overcome

Monday evening meeting starting in the chat room. Follow this link to get in: http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html Topics: Unacceptable Behavior and dealing with lies and excuses from the alcoholic. Open topic as it applies to the al-anon program. Overcomer -- Edited by Overcome on Mo...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Acting "as if" (Preview) Hi Everyone, I was wondering if anyone could explain what acting "as if", looks like in action/real life? I read this today, Perhaps we feel 12 years old, instead of 42. To consciously behave like a responsible 42-year-old is out of the question. Acting "as if", is the next best thing, the program te...	Conflicted	10	802	Feb 4, 2019 by Iamhere
	Cross Talk (Preview) Curious does AlAnon have any literature approaching this related to within meetings? Are there official guidelines related to cross talk? -- Edited by Conflicted on Friday 18th of January 2019 12:33:56 AM	Conflicted	11	3506	Feb 4, 2019 by JerryF
	What is AlAnons position? (Preview) Hi, Where can answers to these questions be found in our literature? (TIA)What is AlAnon's position on members bringing kids fundraisers for schools, bands, sports, etc..in to meeting rooms before, during and after meetings? What is AlAnon's position on members bringing in home business ite...	Conflicted	6	2625	Feb 4, 2019 by Bo
	Better People (Preview) Last night at my home group meeting, we had a newcomer, and this was only her second meeting. She is trying to understand what Al-Anon is all about. She asked a question, "So, is the meaning of this program that we can all become better people?" I thought that was a great way of looking at us. What do you a...	Freetime	14	736	Feb 3, 2019 by WendyP
	Hope for Today feb 3 (Preview) Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is a description of acceptance. The writer describes being given a stuffed toy that ultimately does a number on his/her self esteem because the child is told the gift was given because of his/her resemblance to the toy. Over time, and with the help of a sponsor...	yanksfan51	6	476	Feb 3, 2019 by Wolfie55
	NOT alanon, but I'm traumatized (Preview) I'm going up my work street getting ready to go into left lane and I see these really nice young ladies, stopped in the road and I look and its a gorgeous white husky doggie that they hit.....I stopped and asked if i could help lthem, call someone, just assist...They said they called animal services He wo...	mamalioness	6	587	Feb 3, 2019 by PosiesandPuppies
	Difficulty holding my boundaries (Preview) For the past 6 months my husband has been in and out of detox and sober living. He only lived at home for about a week in October. We have 2 kids (7 and 11). He was a heavy drinker for a long time and I know that recovery will take a long time. Some days are good- he's happy, patient, and positive. Other days he...	JustForMeNow	4	505	Feb 2, 2019 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change 1/31/19 (Preview) Today's reading talks about the power of humility as we work the steps of recovery. The author shares that after working the program zealously for over a year, there was frustration over continued lapses into self-pity and resentment over the alcoholic's inability to give wanted emotional suppo...	Iamhere	3	2749	Feb 1, 2019 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change, February 1 (Preview) Hello. MIP, and welcome to February! In today's reading, the author had stopped enabling an alcoholic, and then felt frustrated because the drinking didn't stop. They wondered what they had done wrong. Then they realized that they were still trying to control alcoholism and its symptoms. In Al-...	Freetime	6	711	Feb 1, 2019 by mamalioness
	great niece arrives! (Preview) My niece's daughter arrived this morning! I am over the moon! I don't know when I will see her but I am excited!	Hoot Nanny	8	2399	Feb 1, 2019 by Hoot Nanny
	How easily I doubt myself (Preview) Hi MIP - I haven't written an update in a while, so here goes! My XAH has almost disappeared over the last 6 months - ever since he got his share of the house money he has been on a very quick downward spiral from alcoholism into drug addiction as well. I wrote a while ago discussing my struggle with the deci...	VickiR	6	2527	Feb 1, 2019 by VickiR
	But its not my faaaaauuuuuult!!!!! (Preview) A Brother calls me today and I am driving home from work, so the bluetooth rings and I see its him.....I hit answer and we talk He told me a boat owner fired him "temporary layoff" he said because "I acted out while drinking" so I listen and he goes on to say that its "not my fault..the guys an A*****e!!!! ...	mamalioness	3	4438	Feb 1, 2019 by PosiesandPuppies
	Trudging the Road.... (Preview) Life Happens. No matter who we are, where we are, how we are, life happens. It's taken me some time to recenter after my son's recent relapse. I am not 'perfect' nor did I desire to be so but I did find peace through this spiritual program. I even made multiple plans this coming week and was really exci...	Iamhere	22	2268	Jan 31, 2019 by Iamhere
	What Ex's Rehab Stint taught me (Preview) I have written here over the last few weeks about the mix of emotions I've experienced when my ex-husband of 3 years (married 20, divorced 3 that is) announced that he was going to rehab over the month of December and did indeed go. I was surprised at the strength of emotions it brought up in me, a lot of whi...	norasq	5	516	Jan 30, 2019 by JerryF
	Courage to Change January 30 (Preview) Hello MIP! Today's reading in Courage to Change speaks to something very personal for me. The author shares that they learned, living with the impact of alcoholism, that plans could change at any moment and that rules varied accordingly. The author developed a mistrust of everyone and everythin...	Skorpi	2	515	Jan 30, 2019 by Iamhere
	I'm not sure where to begin .. (Preview) First off my instincts were right, I really just need to know I know what I know when I know and I knew something was way way off. This directly impacts me financially, my kids insurance and so on. I am soooo tired of this all at the moment. UGH. 7 blasted years we have been doing this and this is the year I...	SerenityRUS	9	953	Jan 30, 2019 by PosiesandPuppies
	ODAT Reading 1-29 (Preview) The ODAT Reading for today, January 29 speaks about having compassion for others. It points out that compassion is supportive, and understanding and does not allow us to do for others what they can do for them selves. The reading suggests that the temptation to give advice or to jump into ano...	hotrod	4	556	Jan 30, 2019 by Lyne
	Marriage Counseling --can I talk about the alcohol? anyone have experience with marriage counseling? (Preview) So the 23 year year marriage has had bumps over the years. Marriage counseling in the past that did help. Now over the past 2-3 years things have really gotten rocky. Over the last 5 years is when alcohol by husband started to really increase, and that started a lot of his selfish behavior and lack of a...	Dancer66	16	973	Jan 29, 2019 by norasq
	Self-Care (Preview) When I was young, so much younger than today, I wore glasses. When I ran with the local street gang, I stopped wearing glasses because it wasn't cool and after all, I was trying to pretend I was someone I wasn't to get people to like me. In my twenties, I started wearing them again, but twenty years later th...	Wolfie55	8	605	Jan 28, 2019 by Overcome
	Evening Meeting starting in mip chat room (Preview) I'm in the Meeting/Chat room if anyone would like to join me for a meeting. http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html Topic: Why do we keep coming back? (based on today's reading in Courage to Change) Overcomer -- Edited by Overcome on Monday 28th of January 2019 09:00:19 PM -- Edited by Overc...	Overcome	1	1723	Jan 28, 2019 by Overcome
	evening meetings (Preview) What has become of MIP alanon meetings at 9 weekdays and 7 Sunday? I'm lost. wp	wp	1	486	Jan 28, 2019 by Overcome
	C2C, 1/28 (Preview) The reading for Monday, 1/28 asks the question, why do we keep coming back? One reason is that the writer doesnt want to underestimate the lasting impact that alcoholism has had on them. They can find themselves feeling things becoming unmanageable again if they do not practice recovery. They al...	Lyne	7	538	Jan 28, 2019 by tiredtonite
	An Interesting Observation About Me Today (Preview) It is so Spring-like her today in SoCAL, I just had to do a little tyding up around the house. In doing so, I FINALLY hung some of the art & wall decor I brought over from my previous life (slightly more than 1 year ago)... things that were important to me at the time, and still speak to me - either with col...	PosiesandPuppies	14	642	Jan 28, 2019 by tiredtonite
	Realization about why I am attracted to active alcoholics (Preview) I have been working hard on my recovery with breaks in between so I do not get overwhelmed. I am accessing one on one therapy along with reading on line here and I had a break through. I have been dating two different type of men. One that is sober and does not drink and we get along very well and another that i...	joker	14	4857	Jan 28, 2019 by Bo
	Hope for Today Jan 27 (Preview) Good morning Everyone- Todays reading describes different ways to find strength in the program when feeling overwhelmed, lonely, anxious or having difficulty staying in the present. The writer mentions the importance of meetings and phone calls in order to feel the support that is available. ...	yanksfan51	5	633	Jan 27, 2019 by El
	Using my tools (Preview) Today my A is in a snit and guess what? I've decided to have a good weekend regardless. The sun is out, I am healthy, nobody has died, and I believe I can cope and have a good attitude. Thank you alanon! Lyne	Lyne	7	1833	Jan 27, 2019 by tiredtonite
	Need to talk/vent about AW and major issues! (Preview) Hi everyone, I'm new here and just I really want to talk about what's happening to me with people who have been there and done that. Well, when you hear the story I don't know that anyone has been exactly here, but at least some of you have maybe at least dealt with some form of this ridiculous situation tha...	Hbgchick	13	2225	Jan 26, 2019 by Hbgchick
	Do I want Relief or Recovery? (Preview) Pretty new here and for the most part I've been a lurker, absorbing everything I can about Alanon. I went to my 1st Alanon meeting five years ago, with pen and notebook in hand, eagerly waiting for all the experienced members to give me a checklist of how to get my son to stop drinking. Needless to say, I wa...	TrishaNorth44	6	820	Jan 25, 2019 by Lyne
	ODAT - January 25 (Preview) Today's reading in One Day At a Time in Al-Anon points out that we can't simply eliminate our faults. Forcing ourselves to stop a bad habit or compulsion doesn't work. We need to replace the defect with something better. Today's Reminder provides some examples: If I am morose and discontented, I wil...	Freetime	4	1011	Jan 25, 2019 by PosiesandPuppies
	Today's Share: January 23 (Preview) Hello MIP! I usually post from Courage to Change, but I also keep that book in my office, and with all the snow we got, I can't get to it. (2 hours of shoveling, though! No need to hit the gym today, as it is still snowing, and I know I'll get the opportunity to shovel the driveway again later today.) Today'...	Skorpi	7	6607	Jan 25, 2019 by mamalioness
	Game ideas for a conference (Preview) I am looking for some game ideas for our conference when we are gathering and between events. Any ideas please?	Nadinemel	2	1947	Jan 25, 2019 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change 1/24/19 (Preview) Today's reading starts with a simple yet bold statement - I will dare to be myself. Six simple words that for me are a great way to start the day! The reminder tells us: I have a right to want what I want and to feel the way I feel. I may not choose to act on those feelings or desires, but I won't hide them from...	Iamhere	6	664	Jan 24, 2019 by mamalioness
	someone help (Preview) my name is Lora and my wife is an alcoholic. both of her parents are alcoholics and she also suffers from depression, ptsd, anxiety, and is disassociative. our relationship has been steadily going downhill since I would say...right after we got married in July. she blames me for everything. lit...	loranard	22	2165	Jan 24, 2019 by Hbgchick
	Relapse after 120 days (Preview) My daughter (sober 120 days on Jan 14th) was brought home tonight by a co-worker. She was drunk. Things have been going so well and we have been so grateful. She and her 5 year old live with me, the little one is at her other g-ma's tonight, thank God. Anyway, I lost it. Blame, shame, yelling and cryin...	MelanieJ	12	4945	Jan 24, 2019 by Maresie
	Sitting with an old unpleasant feeling (Preview) I had a parent from the school call me to talk to me about how her daughter was upset by my daughter's name calling. My first reaction was to do whatever I could to improve my daughter's behaviour (they are both six) and to protect her daughter from further upset. My daughter is quite full on and, I believe...	Faintly Falling	4	920	Jan 24, 2019 by Maresie
	Well I never.... (Preview) In the 40+ years of recovery including being a therapist in a large in/out recovery program have seen this but once and that was this morning!! It blew me away when the cake pastry past before my eyes as the husband handed it to his recovering wife as she celebrated her 6th year of sobriety as I had to spe...	JerryF	5	2003	Jan 23, 2019 by Twinkies
	ODAT Reading 1-22-2019 (Preview) The ODAT Reading for today, January 22 speaks about trusting HP, through prayer and asking for guidance The reading suggests that the temptation to go it alone and force solutions is one of our frequent"go to" actions. I know that i always made up a solution, to my issues such as- deny realit...	hotrod	5	714	Jan 22, 2019 by mamalioness
	Little moments can have a big impact (Preview) The weekend started off on a bad note for me. I took something AH did (or rather, didnt do) personally. But I came and posted here, got my feelings out, and that by itself helped me to regain some perspective. The responses that followed from some of you helped even more and by the end of the evening, my min...	Twinkies	6	679	Jan 22, 2019 by 2HP
	Hope for Today Jan 20 (Preview) Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about how our recovery is directly affected by the amount of effort we put into it. The writer compares this to a student who may get by in school, but will have minimal results if the student makes a habit of skipping homework, staying up late, missing classes...	yanksfan51	6	766	Jan 21, 2019 by mamalioness
	C2C, 1/21 (Preview) The reading for Monday, 1/21, discusses how the author was confused about what was their business, they felt they had to take care of everyone, and they could not pay attention to their own needs. Alanon helped them listen and learn to their own body, soul, and HP. They would check in with themself-h...	Lyne	6	680	Jan 21, 2019 by mamalioness
	My slogan for today (Preview) LET IT BEGIN WITH ME *************************** Today, I was in a pissy mood...stuff going wrong, stuff coming at me that I didn't like and I tossed a temper tantrum that would scare the squirrrels out of the trees. AFTER I vented my spleen, hitting a busted ole keyboard on a chair and letting lo...**	mamalioness	7	693	Jan 21, 2019 by Temple
	A look at the Serenity Prayer (Preview) We treasure our "Serenity Prayer" because it brings a new light to us that can dissipate our oldtime and nearly fatal habit of fooling ourselves. In the radiance of this prayer we see that defeat, rightly accepted, need be no disaster. We now know that we do not have to run away, nor ought we again try t...	mamalioness	5	822	Jan 21, 2019 by PosiesandPuppies
	Can you simply stop talking about it? (Preview) Its been a couple of months now that Ive been pretty consistent in the way I conduct myself in regards to AHs drinking. When I first made the decision to disengage a year ago, my actions were unpredictable and Im pretty sure AH never knew what to expect from me. I never knew what to expect from me either. It...	Twinkies	7	5976	Jan 21, 2019 by Twinkies
	Why does it hurt so much? (Preview) Ive come to the realization that I cant change my AH. Been working on accepting that for a while now and Im finally there. Im learning to disengage when hes been drinking (which is pretty much daily now) and doing a pretty good job at it too. Im learning to live my life for me and allow him to join in as he desi...	Twinkies	11	1077	Jan 21, 2019 by Twinkies
	Men in Al-Anon (Preview) I was reading through some recent posts today, and one of the 'flavors' that comes up every so often is gender differences - real of perceived - within the rooms of Al-Anon. When I was attending meetings regularly, I lived in a small town of roughly 30,000 people, so there were four Al-Anon meetings ev...	canadianguy	6	1501	Jan 20, 2019 by DavidG
	Meeting starting in chat room (Preview) Evening Meeting starting in chat room, follow this link to get in: http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html Topic: How to keep a positive attitude in the alcoholic home. -- Edited by Overcome on Friday 18th of January 2019 09:34:48 PM	Overcome	1	505	Jan 19, 2019 by Loser1963
	TID BITS OF WISDOM_17 JAN (Preview) Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves. --Carl Jung (1875 - 1961) The best portions of a good man's life, his little, nameless, unremembered acts, of kindness and love. --William WordsworthAlone we can do so little; together we can do so much. --Helen...	mamalioness	5	534	Jan 19, 2019 by Temple
	Irritated .. (Preview) I'm really trying not to react vs respond to what's going on at the moment. If there was a middle finger emoji it would so be flying .. and I apologize I get a little to real with things at times. I am utterly dumbfounded at the moment for someone who "isn't drinking" .. "living a Christian life" the man i...	SerenityRUS	9	710	Jan 19, 2019 by Maresie
	Courage to Change, January 18 (Preview) When starting out in Al-Anon, the author was disturbed to hear that the best way to help an alcoholic is to focus on ourselves. It seemed heartless to stop helping our loved ones. Then another member shared that our desire to help is compassionate, but our old ways of helping may not be helpful. If we d...	Freetime	9	595	Jan 18, 2019 by Freetime
	Courage to Change 1/17/19 (Preview) Today's reading talks about our own process of self-discovery using Al-Anon. The author discusses that perhaps searching from bar to bar, making scenes in public places and getting hysterical over little things is a bit insane. Often, we (friends and family) are the ones who agonize over the alc...	Iamhere	6	482	Jan 17, 2019 by Iamhere
	My Half Baked Idea (Preview) OK.. I hope this will make you lol if you're not having a good day. Mine has been one of feeling powerless but just accepting it. So here goes.. I thought I might help the alcoholic in my life and myself to eat a little healthier. We both like desserts but they are often high fat and high sugar and we're beg...	tiredtonite	9	815	Jan 17, 2019 by wp
	Courage to Change January 16 (Preview) In today's reading in Courage to Change, the author reflects on an important lesson they have learned in AlAnon - thinking before speaking. The author shares that they used to say everything that came to mind, even if they were not sure if what they said was true. Through work in the program, the autho...	Skorpi	8	573	Jan 17, 2019 by El
	Received validation (Preview) As my dating life unfolds, the one man I had been dating, well last weekend, after 7 months of knowing him, he admitted to me he is an active alcoholic and said you can not leave any alcohol around my home as I will drink it. I was feeling a bit crazy and feeling a bit unstable being around him. I thought it was...	joker	6	566	Jan 17, 2019 by Iamhere
	Relapse and Denial (Preview) I am rarely at a loss for words, but find myself there tonight. The details are not important - I am. So often, we can get bogged down in the what happened and the summary is my son has relapsed. Of course, as the evidence presented last evening, my mind goes off to the races wondering how long has this be...	Iamhere	25	910	Jan 17, 2019 by Iamhere
	Watching the progression (Preview) Hello MIP family, I am sure I have written before about the undeniable progression of my AH's disease. It is obviously taking its toll on him physically and cognitively. The times we can be out doing "normal" activities is getting shorter and shorter before he is ready to pass out or even somewhat en...	El	5	537	Jan 16, 2019 by Iamhere
	Some memories... (Preview) Hi y'all Coming up 36 years in Alanon... I am blessed, truly blessed to be here... it was hard at first- and nothing seemed to happen. "now, if not sooner" seems to be the motto at that stage. I am 13 or 14 in this photo. A wee squirt. By age 20 I was 5'6"... This was our family home- our kitchen. I had gotten...	DavidG	6	554	Jan 16, 2019 by PosiesandPuppies
	ODAT Reading 1-15-2019 (Preview) The ODAT Reading for today, January,15 speaks about the erroneous assumption that once the alcoholic reaches sobriety all our problems will be solved. The reading points out that this is an illusion. Sobriety is only the first step in building a good life. We both need to work to overcome the emo...	hotrod	5	547	Jan 15, 2019 by hotrod
	Prayers/good thoughts, etc. requested (Preview) Went to see my Primary Care Physician this morning. This is funny--first one in 40 years and he's retiring in 2 months. I'd been seen by his nurse, and therefor contaminated before I ever got to talk to him, and he's this big teddy bear of a man who comes in beaming at me. And I broke down sobbing while he w...	Temple	24	1019	Jan 15, 2019 by Temple
	Jan 13 Hope for Today (Preview) Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about taking inventory, examining our behavior and participating in our own recovery. The writer describes meetings when a group inventory was taken. The writer felt impatient and anxious to get back to the meeting without the inventory. He/she began t...	yanksfan51	11	677	Jan 15, 2019 by mamalioness
	Monday evening meeting starting in the chat room (Preview) Monday evening meeting starting in the chat room. Follow this link to get in: http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html Topics: Unacceptable Behavior and dealing with lies and excuses from the alcoholic. Open topic as it applies to the al-anon program. Overcomer -- Edited by Overcome on Mo...	Overcome	0	440	Jan 14, 2019 by Overcome
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.