The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Todays reading is a description of acceptance. The writer describes being given a stuffed toy that ultimately does a number on his/her self esteem because the child is told the gift was given because of his/her resemblance to the toy. Over time, and with the help of a sponsor, the writer begins to embrace the toy and appreciate that it, like the writer, made it through his/her childhood. After some time the writer recognized that any perceived ugliness in him-herself really exists in attitudes.
This reading resonated with me because I grew up in a family where whoever could achieve the quickest reply, retort, sarcastic end to a sentence, slight/insult to others won. Growing up in that could be tiring, and did affect self esteem. It was difficult not to be on the defensive constantly, and not to (over)react to any perceived slights. What I appreciate about this writing is it is about making a decision. The writer could not do anything about being given a chimpanzee that according to the gift giver, resembled him/her. The writer could decide, however, to see the beauty in it. If someone aims an insult or any slight toward me, I can also make a decision to take it in, stew about it and take ownership of it, or let it lie and accept that the person who is doing the insulting is the one who has some ugliness to deal with.
Good morning Mary Lovely reminder. Our attitudes toward an event or life in general are crucial and as you point out embracing the positive with acceptance is a great tool
Thanks for your service. PS I think e grew up in the same family :)
Good morning and happy Sunday! Thank you Mary for your service and the daily. I too grew up in a home with constant competing, comparing, sarcasm, etc. As the youngest of 4 and the only gal, I was minimized and discounted just for existing. It was frustrating, exhausting and certainly affected my trust of others as well as my attitude.
I too am so grateful that Al-Anon gave me tools and more to change how/if I am affected by the action/words/other from others. In my experience(s), when I do leave 'it' laying there, and avoid engaging, it is somewhat equal to deciding to keep my power/energy with me vs. giving it to others. After many years of practicing the whit, sarcasm, competing/comparing, I feel way more serenity when I 'don't play/engage' than I ever did in my earlier years of trying to fit in or be a part of.
Acceptance of who I am today (an imperfect lovable and loving child of God) as well as who others are (imperfect lovable and loving children of God) helps me stay on my side of the street where it's more calm, peaceful and joyful! Make it a great day all - off to a meeting and then not too sure - have several SB events to consider yet am almost more excited by the puppy bowl since my team is not playing....ha.ha.ha.ha.
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Thanks Mary for your service. My Foo gave me constant criticism, and all sorts of abuse from an enraged brother, with no protection from parents. I had no self, and developed a concept of self-hate. AlAnon, and especially with the help of my sponsor, enabled me to see the assets I do possess, and the ability to have a caring and kind attitude towards myself. This has been a very important life lesson, Lyne
Thank you Mary for your service, and thank you too for the ESH from others above. I am beginning to finally realize that ATTITUDE IS EVERYTHING!
On day 2 of massive 4 day storms, but I am not complaining! I love the rain, and this part of the country needs it so, so badly! Hoping we get lots of snow to build up our snow-pack.
Iamhere - I am also a football lover, so will be watching the big game today - my team is not there too - but no large parties this year. I am a little bummed, b/c I like the excitement of a lot of people watching/engaging, but I also hate it when I "have" to converse with another guest during the game I am trying to watch, so yeah, good trade off I think! LOL!
I also love the Puppy Bowl! This year, their halftime show looks to be PURRRRRFECT! LOL!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
I read this at 5 a.m. I've challenged myself to read every reading from this book. I go to my f2f meeting tonight and they asked me to read it during the closing. The second time I read it I saw that line "Acceptance changes everything." I like it.
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Not all my days are priceless, but none of them are worthless, anymore.
