The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The reading for Monday, 1/28 asks the question, why do we keep coming back? One reason is that the writer doesnt want to underestimate the lasting impact that alcoholism has had on them. They can find themselves feeling things becoming unmanageable again if they do not practice recovery. They also appreciate the consistency, security, and friendship that program offers each day.
The reminder says that the author is actively pursuing a better life due to working on themself.
The quote says that although they may not follow program exactly, they still have a program.
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I too wondered how someone could attend AlAnon for 10, 20, or 30 years. Like why the heck werent they ever finished? But as the author pointed out, old habits can sneak up and I can find my head swirling where the day before I felt at peace. It is hard to understand the effect, depth, and scope of this disease, except for those of us affected by it. I have respect for each and every one of us working hard to heal. I do truly have a better life since working a program, Lyne
old habits can sneak up and I can find my head swirling where the day before I felt at peace
(((((((((((((((((Lyne))))))))))))))) hey I hear ya and ohhh boy!!!! I think humans are creatures of habit...so why not make a habit out of the program so other habits cannot over ride??? oh yea, for me that is what I want, and obviously everyone here, working hard to stay in the guard rails of recovery
my mind is like an apartment...I am evicting old bad tenants (habits) but if I don't replace them with good tenants (healthy habits) then i get the same old bad tenants, maybe they look different, but they are still bad...so I don't want to be spending my time tossing out same or similiar bad tenants.....rent my mind out to the positive and work to keep them there...
bad analogy but that is what came to my tired, ready for bed mind....
a few years ago a newer, and young member said out loud- is this is such a crash-hot programme, how come you are still struggling to get through it.
A 6 or 8 week course. or a two or three year intensive? This approach will suit some people.
I used to say "long-timer" and not an"old timer". Neither word worries me now! ... 36 years and counting.
A group like this is dynamic- with people from all over the world...some with three minutes into Alanon and some with three or four decades. I have grown and changed in this group. I have gained turning points here.
One member here described her big city group. There are about 50 people at each meeting... they split off into something like a beginners group, a sharing meeting and a steps meeting- and they all met for coffee afterwards. A great idea- giving every person who wanted to take part.
I was never bought up to close to the church. I actually slipped between the wires of a barbed wire fence to attend a local church as a kid. But I have a good nose for things that become rigid and doctrinaire.
Apart from that there is a good case for solid group structures, and boundaries. Something that is fair.
I believe that the elders in our movement are a rich resource. We have all bin there- done that. We can all talk to each other- straight up. As Hotrod says: "Say what you mean, and mean what you say; but don't say it mean."
I am still learning- and catching up on a lot of my life... in many ways I am still young at heart, as a lot of our members are! ...
Great topic I keep coming back because I cherish the support of "like minded" people ho live by the principles I have embraced.
Thanks for your service and thoughts
Great share and topic, Lyne! Thank you for your service!
I came back because I needed help again to manage MYSELF through another round of my spouse's addiction. I found love, people who really understood that dynamic, the undying support... who wouldn't want more of that? LOL!
I stayed b/c in truly "working" my program, I could see there were areas that I could change for the better. I also found many areas outside of the living with addiction-life that I could apply these principles to. This program helps me to be a more loving, accepting person!
Peace & Love,
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
I know that anytime I have strayed from the program, I start reverting to old thoughts, reactions, and behaviors. I can apply the principals to all areas of my life.....all the isms I encounter including my own.
The support, understanding, and lack of judgement through the program is crucial to my wellbeing.
Good morning all and thanks for the shares and ESH above me. Thanks Lyne for your service and the daily. I keep coming back as I just do better when I have a routine, keep life and things simple and meetings always remind me to focus on tools/solutions instead of issues/problems.
Before recovery, I struggled to make changes that would 'stick'. I tried really hard and felt/thought I was committed (positive thinking, stop nagging, mind my own business, etc.) yet the unhealthy patterns always came back up. With recovery and doing what's been suggested, I've found balance, routines and healthier patterns that give me more continuous peace/serenity/joy.
I have taken breaks and it's not been good in the long run. Fear, anxiety and more can and do creep back up and the worst of all for me - the insanity of thinking I can control things beyond self. I am grateful for the program and all of you - enjoy your Monday! We are in line to get the nasty cold weather headed across the country - joy of joys!!! (Not)
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Thanks Lyne for the reading and your share. I laughed when I read your share because I had the same feeling when I saw the tattered program books of a long member at an Alanon meeting. I thought geez I hope it won't take me as long as her to get this LOL. And here I am, very happy to keep coming back and so so much more to learn. Thanks for your service and sharing the road. Glad we have so many great people here who keep coming back to share and recover with one another. (((hugs)) TT
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Surround yourself with people and elements that support your destiny, not just your history.
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... 36 years and counting.