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how to find if i am talking to myself unconciously
(Preview)
so I know this sounds crazy but people have commented on it so like at work the boss was like the ...(main task) girl has a great attitude is a great worker but is always ranting. I swear she was talking about me since I know I am the only one who does that task and I do have those two good qualities. And so somet...
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chchsteak
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2
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1555
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Courage to Change 1-14-2016
(Preview)
The C2C reading for January 14 speaks about being powerless over alcoholism. It points out that others in the fellowship have tried and failed as well so that as we look around we will see that they are happy and willing to accept this reality. By letting go of the battle that we are sure to lose, we b...
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hotrod
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2
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508
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GRATEFUl
(Preview)
I didnt have any shoes and I was always complaining about not having shoes, until I met someone who had no feet! If you can be grateful, you will find the secret of happiness. Try it. Linsc
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LinSC
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3
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307
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C2C Reading for 1-13-2016
(Preview)
Hi I printed the wrong reading from the C2C for today as I loked yesterday's page by mistake I am sorry. The C2C reading for January 13 talk about spiritual freedom, and Al-Anon. It suggests that we are encouraged to find our own understanding of God and to allow others the same freedom because until we...
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hotrod
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2
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496
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New and tired
(Preview)
I am an adult child of an alcoholic (now recovering) and am in a 4yr relationship with an alcoholic. I tagged in in a previous post but I am starting a new topic on my own to get all the help I can.
I am planning on attending Al-Anon meetings here in my area and online as of this morning. I have watched my AB st...
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Marie18
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15
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719
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i didn't know it would bother me..
(Preview)
Here I am in situation that I have no or little control of. I am in the middle looking out. My group us changing the day we meet. Not a problem looking from the outside. But I wasn't informed of a permanent change. I guess I can meet on a different day. I have been praying about going to something else but I kno...
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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408
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seeing the light
(Preview)
I have been reading about detachment on the board here and its helping me so much. I had a good laugh today, the first one in awhile. Talked to ABF this morning and he has "another plan-buy oil stalks." This time, I responded with that is a good idea and went on to talk about something else. I did...
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joker
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5
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503
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Have Courage!!
(Preview)
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Debb
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4
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417
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COURAGE TO CHANGE 1-12-2016
(Preview)
The C2C reading for January 12 speaks about the wonderful tool of "Detachment".It offers a profound example of "detachment": for me to think about . It suggests picturing a person walking along and seeing an active beehive buzzing intently/ If the person stops and p...
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hotrod
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3
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850
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Will it ever be clear?
(Preview)
I just got back last week from my holiday with my family back east. It was very nice to have time with both my mom and my sister. I came back hoping for some sort of breakthrough as to if I want to stay with my ABF or not. Needless to say no answers where clear. What is clear is that on returning from our time apar...
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ItsAllAboutMeMC
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5
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590
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Need Help
(Preview)
It's been a while since I've logged on, but am always grateful for my MIP family. I'm still having difficulty extricating myself from my AexH and his AW and am wondering if someone can direct me where to go for help in my community. For those that don't know me, I've been divorced since 2006, but get dra...
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bud
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8
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535
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It's been a year. . .
(Preview)
Last January I came here and posted when I realized my ABF was drinking again. I posted once, and I lurked in the shadows from that point on reading occasionally. I'm not sure if I wasn't ready to face the addiction issue head on, or if I wasn't ready to take on the work I needed to do in myself, maybe a little...
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NayNay
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9
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538
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Oh my goodness relization
(Preview)
I just had an ahh moment. My alcoholic Bf is playing me a like puppet. He says this and I say that, he says this, and i react with oh what about me, he say this and I go what about me, and then I says I hates his life here, and all I do is work, work and blaa, and I react with words of feeling sorry for him and wanting...
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joker
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3
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485
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Stressed
(Preview)
A few days ago my A made some really bad decisions (so what else is new?) which resulted in a very dangerous situation where she could have been seriously victimized or even killed.
Actually, for a couple days before this, I knew she was moving into dangerous territory (it starts with binging, then s...
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lgnutah
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2
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282
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Lost a friend need advice
(Preview)
I am brand new to al Anon have only been to two meeting go to my third tomorrow. My boyfriend is in AA and recently lost three people within the last week. Two he knew the third he knew a little better. He is not handling it like a normal sober person does I guess. what I don't understand is that he hasnt spoken...
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Mylife16
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6
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742
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Hope for Today 1/12
(Preview)
Good morning Everyone- Today's reading begins with the personification of alcoholism- as a thief. It is such a powerful image- a force that has the ability to rob us of the people we love, take physical safety from us, jobs. It may even steal someone's life. We have hope and faith that there is anoth...
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yanksfan51
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2
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474
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Courage to Change 1-10-2016-
(Preview)
The C2C reading for January 10th speaks about the many hours we have sacrificed living in worry and fear. The reading points out that once we open the Pandora's box of worry and relentless self-criticism, the more we lose our foothold in reality. Then nothing useful can be accomplished.In order to br...
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hotrod
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6
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691
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anxious today
(Preview)
got up today with stuff i need to do but feel anxious. i have suffered from anxiety,panic attacks,agoraphobia since i was 17,im 58 now. since then i am on my own, i have to deal with this. I sometimes revert to these old tapes of feeling im imposing on people or im not good enough. like i have to leave for 4hr...
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YARNCRAZY
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5
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554
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Serenity.. Where are you????
(Preview)
So I turned off the magic $$$ supply for my husband...who is mostly sober, but as of late, not always. He has cirrhosis/end stage liver disease. He is not able to work. When I turned off the money fountain, which was big deal he had no money no job I have money and good job.. he decided to start selling expen...
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ShellyM
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4
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586
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unreal what an alcoholic will say
(Preview)
Just wanted to provide an update. Since the abf had the talk with me last week, he seems to have changed his tune again. Yesterday, he said to me, don't worry about anything, everything is good. I just said ok and did not respond any further. Since we had the talk and he did says me and my daughter should fin...
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joker
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5
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594
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Courage to Change Reading 1-11-2016
(Preview)
The C2C reading for January 11 speaks about joining Al-Anon family groups and by dong so having finally" found a second family". In his new family we are accepted, just as we are. We don't have to pretend or wear a mask over our feelings. We can speak freely and know that our words will not lea...
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hotrod
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4
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678
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Help me think through healthy boundaries
(Preview)
Hello, I'm new to this group and just starting my alanon journey. Thank you for helping me sift through my thoughts and feelings. My husband is an alcoholic and though he has been dry for long stretches he has a lot of denial and does not want any kind of formal treatment or support in staying sober long te...
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Taraxacum
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13
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825
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miracles do happen... just saying.😊
(Preview)
I am proof that miracles happen. I was so lost & didn't even know it. Whenever I use the program for solutions to my problems, I am in tune to the blessings that often occur w o me always being aware. It is funny how all I have to do is open my eyes to see what is in front of me. So, I don't have to struggle as mu...
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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583
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quick update
(Preview)
I found a lawyer for the house. I will be making an appointment next week to deal with the house. I will be doing what I can to protect me right now. I will be nice to BF, kind, but I will no longer be there for him anymore. Like I was told, let lawyer know, he had given you a lifestyle and money, which he deposit...
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joker
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4
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588
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There are days and there are days .. lol
(Preview)
You know I keep thinking I wonder if I'm going to win this mondo jackpot that is brewing based upon the financial craziness that is going on in my life. It's not awful .. it's not great however it could always be better. So I was suppose to get an automatic deposit to my checking account this week. For so...
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SerenityRUS
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8
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632
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what a week it has been
(Preview)
This has been a week to remember after both of my program friends have had surgery on the same day. They are both recovering pretty well...It takes time. One had cataract surgery & the other had a hysterectomy. I am grateful to call them both friends & I love them dearly. So, I have to wait for my c...
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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568
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todai i overdid alanon
(Preview)
today, i think i stretched the technique of 'say what u mean and mean what u say' . Guypal is coming over and i was real shoert with him and im going to apologize as soon as he gets here. Not to get too detailed, being stronger now makes me brutally honest, more so than i ever was. I see my value[ despite my prob...
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YARNCRAZY
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4
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601
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breaking up with alcoholic after relapse - any hope?
(Preview)
Hi everyone. I have been dating an alcoholic for five years, living together for about a year and a half. He went to rehab briefly in 2013 - only ten days. Got a DUI in fall of 2014 and spent December 2014 in rehab. For 2015, he was completely sober. Attended AA and a separate therapist, and everything was g...
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clhiod
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9
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2823
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reality is painful
(Preview)
My abf is still sober, 3 months and not working a program as he works in camp and all he does is work and sleep for up to 3 weeks at a time and then off work for 3 days and then back at work again. Since he got sober, its been a roller coaster. One day he has this plan, next day its this plan, and this plan. It constan...
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joker
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3
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587
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Courage to Change Reading 1-9-2016
(Preview)
The C2C reading for January 9. talk about our usual habit of looking outside of ourselves for approval. It points out that our projects may be very successful.but we do not feel good about anything unless it is acknowledged by others. It suggests that everyone does need an occasional pat on the ba...
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hotrod
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3
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1860
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This isn't new for us as we discuss it often...
(Preview)
However just for the day I am putting myself on a prayer list as necessary. The hotel my wife and I work at is closing shop at the end of the month and for the minute we don't have an idea "what's next"?? Its too early I know as we are still in the hotel mode and affected by the bad economy too. H...
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Jerry F
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14
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650
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It is what it is.
(Preview)
My stupid broken foot is becoming a depressing reality rather than a novel reason to say"OMG can you believe this annoying thing that's happened?". I missed my first week of summer school due to not being able to walk. I'm less than thrilled about that. I haven't yet allowed myself to cons...
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missmeliss
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4
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638
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Oh the guilt!!!! What is wrong with me?!
(Preview)
So, I moved myself and my two daughters out of our home 4 weeks ago and peace beyond all understanding came rushing over the 3 of us! That was until my AH decided to dry out and sober up. When he is sober he is spot on husband and father whom I dearly love! But, now that he's been sober without the help of AA for 2...
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savannah7070
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10
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632
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in myapartment
(Preview)
im in my apartment and except for some bugs[roaches to work out.its pretty cool.i breathe smoke fee potfree vodka free air. i can do what i want and only answer to myself.alot of details need to be taken care of but YEAH for me.alanon meeting only 10 mins by bus on same line away.i even met a pre marriage fr...
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YARNCRAZY
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8
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648
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Good Day today
(Preview)
I had a super day today. Went for job interview at place i want to work, just 5 mins away. Cross your fingers for me pals... Did grocery shopping,came home on bus. listened to some awesome tunes. did some couponing. waiting to see if new male friend hee hee calls. Im going to make dinner for him tomorow nit...
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YARNCRAZY
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4
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324
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Feel sick to my stomach
(Preview)
Let me first start by saying that I have just created an account to ask for help because I am so ashamed of what I have done that I don't want to tell my sponsor. I am actually in NarAnon, but there is no NarAnon board here, so I hope this is ok. The steps are the same, so I figure maybe you can offer some advice...
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sosick79
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6
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587
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hardly coping and constantly worried
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, I have gotten to the point where I just need to find a sponsor and work the program. I don't know if this is possible online. I have tried to go to meetings in my area (there are only 2 a week) but I can't find the location of one of them and I am not getting enough support where I am at. I had a sponso...
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needabreak
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5
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717
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new here
(Preview)
Hi everyone, as you can see from the subject I'm new here and just starting out on my journey to try and help myself after all the problems I have had in dealing with my mother since a young age. I guess I just need to know that I'm not the only one out there dealing with these issues and I'm hoping to be able t...
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LaceyD26
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4
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509
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Courage to Change 1-8-2016
(Preview)
The C2C reading for January 8 speaks about the slogan,"Letting Go and Letting God. " It points out that once we finally understand how truly powerless,we are, we can then pick up the slogan and truly let go of our fear, anxiety, and constant need to control by turning it all over to HP and...
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hotrod
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4
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570
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Courage to Change Reading 1-7-2016
(Preview)
The C2C reading for January 7, speaks about the Just For Today pamphlet. . It points out that the suggestion that "Just for today we will have a quiet half hour all by ourselves to relax, is a very important recommendation. The reading acknowledges " How simple it sounds"!!! &quo...
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hotrod
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6
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683
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Back Again
(Preview)
I used to have an account here, but lost the password so I started a new one. My husband is an active functioning alcoholic and we have 3 young children. He has been active with a 2 year stretch of sobriety almost 8 years ago. I call him functioning because no one can tell he's an alcoholic, it is always i...
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Hopefully Optimistic
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4
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611
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Over the last year...
(Preview)
To begin, I have been married for over 20 years to a very serious AH. He had one (dry) period of 6 months several years ago and has been "sober" for the last nine months (working the program for the first time). He and I had become quite the love/hate relationship with a few weeks of half way d...
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Doingmybest
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5
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702
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Secrets
(Preview)
As I was reading another post today, I saw a statement about having the courage to face the things we have been hiding away. (This is not an exact quote). For me, I find that secrets are like a a slow spreading poison. They damage everyone and I don't do well with them. My biggest issue is that I don't ofte...
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Doingmybest
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3
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824
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Should I ask him for money ?...
(Preview)
This is.the most access/time Ive had to post on here and to take in all of the wonderful shares and suggestions. Ive eluded in previous posts that my AH and I are waring over money right now. He's lost several jobs in a very short timespan leaving me to struggle to keep things afloat for our family of 4. He'...
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Hopefull15
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4
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622
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My Qualifier
(Preview)
Whoever was the focus of my obsessions and frantic dancing to manipulate the outcome does not matter. I arrived at AlAnon completely in the middle of my own maladaptive behavior. My formula was to try harder doing and thinking my ineffectual way. It is I who needed help here. I am my own AlAnon qualifi...
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Jill
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3
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1738
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How to detach?
(Preview)
I posted this on another forum but wanted your ESH as well. This is so hard for me to do! My AH is trying to get sober again (supposedly) and is on day 6 I think. I'm somewhat skeptical obviously but trying to support him. My problem is the jerky behavior is still an issue - another shut-down just happened th...
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ChipsAreFalling
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7
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1051
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How time flies when we deal in *daily chaos*....
(Preview)
Just had a revelation....When thinking back on the timeline of just the most recent events of deterioration in my family (not including what has transpired over the years in total)...Im am absolutly blown away at what felt like an eternity was really only events that transpired over a 12 month perio...
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Hopefull15
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2
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335
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children divorce ah and infidelity
(Preview)
So im moving out tomorrow . . My stbexah cheated multiple times over many years. Is begging for forgivenes, bla bla and saying he will change. We are proceeding with the divorce. My 11 yp daughter the love if my life blames me. "why cant you forgive. . What did he do. . ". . Shes knows of his drink...
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Theoceancalls
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11
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853
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Relapse
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, The wife had what I hoped was a slip about a month-and-a-half ago. She bought a vodka bottle at the drugstore, and downed most of it a day later. I caught her in the garage trying to get more in the morning. It scared the daylights out of her, she was on the phone at 3 AM trying to raise her spon...
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KennyFenderjazz
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29
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972
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How does the next step work?
(Preview)
I have been to 5 meetings so far. I know that I am here to stay. Things finally reached the point where I had nowhere to turn but to myself - thank God. I've been working very hard at following the steps and reading the literature and attending the meeting near my home. From what I have learned, a lot of pro...
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ShellyM
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6
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662
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Ready to Explode!!!...My AH is trying really hard to pick a fight
(Preview)
He keeps coming home (after a full day of drinking) talking sh** and being a jerk. The more I ignore the more he keeps at it with little things like burning my pots trying to cook (for the second time in 24 hrs) Cant call my sponsor right now because I would need to leave the kids home alone with him in order to...
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Hopefull15
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17
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695
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New to forums, and having a tough night
(Preview)
After six months of increasingly bad drinking and poor responsibility, last month we told my adult son that he could not return to live with us once he had left rehab (his third rehab in 2015). I have a good counselor and a supportive husband and family, but tonight it's late, everyone's asleep, and I'm...
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Foothold
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6
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532
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I'm Trying - but its getting harder
(Preview)
My AH has been working to stay sober since April, with a relapse in August.
He swears that he hasn't had a drink since I caught him last, in August. I'm trying really hard to believe him.
Although, nights like last night is making it very difficult. He will have a night or two each week - usually the sam...
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EarlyBird
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2
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392
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courage
(Preview)
I will not let this latest news shatter me. I cried this morning,but now I am determined to help my daughter as much as I can.Her husband is going to prison for molesting my granddaughter,there is proof in his text messages. She is left with a terrible financial burden,she may lose her home,it isn't fai...
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mjferg
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5
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552
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Newbie here - scared & angry
(Preview)
Good morning - my first post here - trying to wrap my head around my situation and not feeling like I'm getting very far. I'm scared and finding it hard to admit he is an AH. I'm angry - really angry that i'm having to deal with any of this. Is that normal? I think I still love my AH but at the same time I feel...
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Joy2flow
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11
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625
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Courage to Change Reading 1-6-2016
(Preview)
The C2C reading for January 6 reminds us that in between meetings we must keep in close touch with other Al-Anon members by telephone. Sharing Al-Anon recovery by telephone allows me to reach out to someone else and talk things over ton reason things out. .I must remember that the person I'm talki...
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hotrod
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2
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517
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Taking my luck as it comes...
(Preview)
I really like the just for today poem. I wrote it out and read it often. The part that really gets me is the part about "just for today I will take my luck as it comes and try to fit myself to it". It gets me because it wss such a forign concept to me. I've been waking up each morning and saying this to m...
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KT2015
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7
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701
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its true
(Preview)
As I sit here and type I am shaking,my granddaughter is telling the truth, she was molested.The family is coming together to support my daughter and my granddaughter,my heart is aching for my daughter,what a terrible thing to be betrayed like that by her husband,I can't imagine the pain.She is filin...
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mjferg
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9
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675
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Partner out of rehab and behaviour appears the same
(Preview)
My partner has now been out of rehab 3 weeks and I notice his behaviors are very similar as before he went in. He is not attending any meetings or seeing any workers just reading his workbooks he says and making statements he will never drink again as he is now cured of that he is 100% sure. He is going witho...
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Carmel 15
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6
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495
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New Here and have a simple question
(Preview)
My GF has been in AA and sober for about 19 days. Is it ok to tell her I am proud of her? Or is there a way to communicate that and be supportive to her?
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lounap23
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3
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344
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