Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

ShellyM · ShellyM

I've posted a few times before. My AH has cirrhosis and was initially sober for over 2 years. The alcohol is back. I thought as recently as a week ago that it was an isolated incident, but it wasn't. I've been going to Al Anon since right after that happened and it has been a Godsend. I'm still new and do not y...

hotrod · hotrod

The Courage to Change reading for January 25 speaks about liking the drama and the excitement of crisis in other people's lives, and ignoring our own life. By coming into Al-Anon we are encouraged to keep the focus on ourselves,talk about ourselves and not anybody else. Many of us discover that we...

Jen61 · Jen61

I have been the alcohol police for 11 years. It is a thankless job, stressful, no benefits and the pay is low. I have decided to quit this job. I gave my two weeks notice last week.Over the years I have gone to F2F meetings for Al-anon and also AA, online meetings, read books, read message boards, etc. ...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Well daughter turned the big 13 today and we did just as we pleased without being beholden to anyone and, it was lovely

This time last year we were staying at my mothers with no fixed address and the stress of it all had us both pretty downcast. The year before we stayed with mother at her beach house and...

ItsAllAboutMeMC · ItsAllAboutMeMC

So Friday I had a moment of clarity. I have been racking my brain and resources trying to figure out what to do for my ABF as his birthday is this week. But then I thought about my birthday this past year and how I was so disappointed. My ABF was in jail on my bday so I decided to go visit him and supersize him as I...

pjwa12726 · pjwa12726

Today I am visiting family and I am struggling with the memories of our life in better times. I say better times but they really were not better. My AH and I are living separately because my life living with him became unmanageable. There were his vices which were first alcohol, then grass and who knows w...

joker · joker

Lately these days she's full of plans and they always change. Its just crazy. Found this on another members page, and can I relate. He is full of plans now and its always changing. Its just crazy. I can so relate. But how do you let that go? I need to let what he says go as his plans are forever changing. I just...

Foothold · Foothold

Our alcoholic son, who we no longer allow to live here, still receives mail at our house. Spouse and I talked it over, and we're going to try to convince AS to get a post office box and change his address. We are willing to pay for six months' box rent up front to cut this tie he has with our home. He comes to get...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for January 24 speaks about being honest with ourselves and with others. It points out that we do not have to pretend to feel what we do not feel or want things that we do not want. It suggests that Al-Anon does not tell me how to behave and does not legislate right or wrong choices. It si...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

i finally went to the Alanon meeting near my new place. It had a differnt but good vibe there. It was at 8pm so i took the bus and found the place despite anxiety. The meeting was a candlelight one. I had never attended a candle light meeting. With the lights so low, many people shared their pain and their ho...

Pearlgirl · Pearlgirl

I understand there's some blizzard conditions for many members right now, where I live it's summer but our family had it's own storm today.. Firstly found a stash of marijuana daughter had hidden.. then daughter and AH had a screaming match over financial information my daughter was refusing to sha...

bedroomeyez39 · bedroomeyez39

I dont even know if this is where i need to be so I apologize in advance I am not being directly affected by someone drinking. What is happening is my boyfriend of 2 months is in AA. I met him almost a year into sobriety. I have been trying my best to help support him even tho I dont understand what the AA 12 ste...

Pearlgirl · Pearlgirl

I am new here and am so worn down by my husband and daughter's drinking.. Over Christmas I witnessed my university aged daughter, who was on holiday with us, daily binge drinking with friends, whilst my husband would of an evening sink enough beer/gin to anaethetise himself comfortably and talk in re...

catlover26 · catlover26

In March it will be 2 yrs that I have been dating my A boyfriend. I knew with him being 15 yrs older there would be differences but he just seems to be changing so fast. I know some of it can be related to his ptsd and depression but I feel some he could have better control and try to get a more positive attitude....

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for January 23 speaks about Step Three. This is the Step where we are asked to make a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood him. The reading points out that this is a huge decision. It helps to work the Steps in order because the order in which the fi...

joker · joker

I am trying not to take this personally. ABF has gone to meet his ex-wife who he claims wants to get back together. He needs to get some paperwork from her. I just smiled and waved at him as he left. I Am trying to keep the focus on me and what I need to do for myself. He has made all kinds of promises again, we are...

Jerry F · Jerry F

and I was going to get lunch at McD's. While in the line a woman in front of me held out $3 and something cents and asked if I could buy her lunch and pay the difference. Okay...conference with HP and said I would taking the 3 bucks. HP asked me what do you need her 3 bucks for? Hmmmm actually I don't I t...

lmb2015 · lmb2015

I am new to this os if I am posting the wrong way, or in the wrong place, let me apologize in advance. When I say unconventional, the person I am trying to help is the best friend of my children. She is now 17, but in my life since she was about 3. I love her as my child. Comes from completely destructive, dysfun...

joker · joker

Well, it happened. Abf came home from work and relapsed and got very drunk on beer and double whisky drinks. He was sober for 3 months without a program. He was very very sick the next day but I did not baby him nor feel sorry for him at all. I just detached. He said all the right words, I can not do this anymore...

Amandasheart · Amandasheart

So I am going to try and make a long story short, or at least the cliff notes version. I have an ah; I left for a little over a year and he was sober the last 7 months, he lost 140 lbs and was doing so well, so I went back thinking things had dramatically changed, boy was I wrong, he began drinking again, he has a...

Iamhere · Iamhere

So....for those who don't know, I have online stores. As such, Paypal is my payment processor by choice and by default (required on ebaY).... Needless to say, Paypal's records for me and my social do not match my SSN...so no matter how many times I send in the required documents, each year at tax time,...

Taraxacum · Taraxacum

I started seeing a therapist who has an expertise in addiction and family counciling. He made a comment durring a session suggesting I get out of the way and let my AH experience the fallout of his drinking. My AH is functioning, and much of the fallout is showing up as issues in our marriage which in his e...

Nightingale · Nightingale

Does anyone know of any online groups like this one for friends and family of those suffering from seaver anxiety and depression?

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for January 21 speaks about being able to identify what is our business and what is not our business. It points out that prior to program we thought it was our business to help fix everything and everybody around. Al-Anon helps me to listen and learn from my own body, soul and HP. How do I d...

joker · joker

jointdoc · jointdoc

This is brand new to me, and I am very sorry that this is so long. . I am not sure if there is a place for me. I'm not an alcoholic or drug addict. Neither is my wife. But my wife's brother (age 40s) is an alcoholic and drug addict. . His job (trucker) takes him away frequently, which gives him opportunity to h...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for January 20 speaks about the principle of " anonymity". That this spiritual foundation of our traditions makes it possible for members to leave not only our surnames and all our labels and expectations outside the rooms, so we can put aside what we are and begin to kno...

Mylife16 · Mylife16

Here's the situation, it hasn't even been two solid weeks of me going to alanon to give me strength not knowledge, he came home distraught says we need to talk, to make a long story short he says because of his abandonment from when he was a child to the alcohol to not having a happy healthy relationship to...

KT2015 · KT2015

The topic of my RL meeting this week was on fear. The moment it was introduced I wanted to run. Then we did some readings from the literature about fear. I felt like I was going to have a panic attack at times in that meeting and even though I really wanted to share I just couldn't bring myself to do it with...

LedfootJenny · LedfootJenny

Hi everyone. Major slip up last night. AH got his one year yesterday and I got a mental movie that played over all the carnage this disease has left in it's wake the last five years. ( it gets better ) I then proceeded to take his inventory, remind him of carnage, throw a tantrum and sabotage his night! N...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Today's reading speaks about the importance of sharing at meetings, both for the person who is doing the sharing and for those that are there to listen. Like the writer, the first year of meetings were difficult for me- depending on what was happening in my life, I would either...

joker · joker

I attended a face to face al-anon meeting last night and it was great to share my emotions. I have also been reading a lot on this forum and its helping me feel I can do this. I had a moment of wow, when I remember being in a sick relationship with my ex-husband, ex bf's and how they use to say I was crazy. Today...

bud · bud

I brought all of my MIP family support, my support from my HP, and my alanon toolkit to my Dad's funeral yesterday. For years, I had imagined this moment as being a tortuous culmination of years of being a family scapegoat. What actually happened was none of that. This is another life lesson in my kee...

bud · bud

Tomorrow is Dad's funeral. That alone is overwhelming. My sister's stirring of the pot may have re-severed the precarious relationship with my Aunt and Uncle. It was her fabricated tales that drove them to be angry with me and history could have repeated. I know that if that's all it took for my Aun...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

A quote from Iman David Bowie's widow: Sometimes you will never know the true value of a moment until it becomes a memory. Food for thought. I thought it might be needed. Happy Monday!

joker · joker

I had an ah moment yesterday. I was talking to my AFB on the phone and the conversation was happy and full of laughter. It was positive until I mentioned my daughter and her struggles. My daughter has mental health issues and lives with me and is really having a hard time with isolation, lack of motivatio...

JL969803 · JL969803

Well, I just found out my AH has not been sober since April. He's been lying and hiding it and stupid me fell for it. I found the 2 little bottles hidden yesterday, confronted him and he admitted to it. He had no choice. I feel like such a fool. Nothing is going right for us which I know is contributing to his...

Jerry F · Jerry F

I spent some time at a clients home this afternoon that my eldest son also is doing some work for. I was no surprise that the client told me that he had learned stuff from my son about alcoholism in that my son admits to not being comfortable or in line with his new woman friends drinking. He has started...

lgnutah · lgnutah

Do you ever feel this way? The constant repetition of our A's bad decisions are so wearing (despite trying to use all the tools of AlAnon). Detaching with love and Letting go are "mental and emotional" escapes....distancing oneself from the turmoil of the A's life...... But wouldn't...

whoknows · whoknows

5 years ago I didn't know what a functioning alcoholic was. I learned after my husband retired and became a non functioning alcoholic. No reason here to go into to much detail as most of you will already know, but, here's a little background of the past 5 years. We went from a nice nest egg to over 100k in d...

joker · joker

I had to share this as I am seeing growth in myself. I talked with alcoholic bf yesterday and he was nice and kind toward me. I was as well. I had to laugh as he said I have done so much since I got sober. He has been sober only 3 months. He has made progress in the last year and a half. He has got himself a vehicle, g...

bud · bud

Hi dear MIP family, I'm writing from a hotel room. I received word that my dad passed last night and so I drove a few hours to say my good byes. I collected a few momentos and my daughter who lives too far to be with me secured a room so I didn't have to drive home . My mom passed last year, the day after Xmas. ...

serenity47 · serenity47

I just thought I would share a little update on my life. At this time, my life has settled down considerably. I am attending weekly al-anon meetings, an online group, and this board, all which have helped me immensely. Right now AD is in treatment with a plan to enter into recovery home following. T...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Good Morning Everyone The time has come to put everything I've learned to the test. My son will be released next month and I have decided to help him get started with a hand and love but I promised myself I will never again engage in his business. He has done well for himself in prison. He's a Per Counse...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for January 18 speaks about keeping the focus on ourselves because by so doing we will discover the best way we can help an alcoholic. The reading suggests that by keeping the focus on ourselves, we are not motivated to try to change someone else's behavior and to do for others what the...

Inga · Inga

I am new here and new to Al-Anon. It is about time I seek help for myself! Thank you to anyone who is reading this! I am married to an alcoholic, a daily drinker, and weekend sports watcher/total drunk. On the weekends my husband watches sports with our son, and proceeds to get wasted, becoming then l...

Mylife16 · Mylife16

The past few days I have just distanced myself completely tryin to be as nice as I can but I can't shake this feeling of just emptiness. Two weeks ago huge discussion between me and my A boyfriend he pretty much told me we were two different people now, that the person I fell in love with was not who he should...

Heisenberg · Heisenberg

Had a really tough day today with my ex. I've been out of the house for about 3 weeks, and she has really been working on staying sober (and she has) and attending more meetings and using her support system, which is great. She has been holding out hope that I will "try to make it work" with her af...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Which is causing me BIG issues as far as acting out. I have actually been REALLY good considering what has been going on. I am currently dealing with a work situation that involves someone I really like as a person however as a co-worker they are completely toxic. I don't use that term lightly. This w...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for January 17 speaks about our interactions with the alcoholic and how irrational and unreasonable, we can become. It points out that because of the built up anxiety and irrational fear generated within us by living with this disease, many times we are the ones who act out, and ru...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for January 16 speaks about "reacting" to situations. It points out that when a thought enters our mind we often feel that we automatically MUST speak kit. I know I though T that I had a very powerful mind as I could react instantly to any argument or situation without think...

Themoon · Themoon

can someone offer suggestions on how to stay connected with an alcoholic when they don't want to talk? i still worry.

Fairlee · Fairlee

Hi Fam! I have been here reading but haven't responded in a while. I was feeling incredibly sorry for myself and had myself in a lovely, (not really) deep hole of despair. thankfully I feel as if I am climbing back out. I have been reading my Al Anon literature and lately "giving back" has real...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

Life is not all sunny here. About 2xs a week I have these meltdowns. I get anxious,depressed,cry alot and generally have a pity party. Last night I had a big meltdown. Ihad been looking at 30+ yrs of my diaries. I realized that I keep ending up in the same types of relationships. I keep making similar mist...

joker · joker

I was to meet with a lawyer regarding my house situation but I have been to sick to do it. Found out I have another infection raging in my stomach and I am now back on another dose of antibiotics and I am in pain and very, very tired. I am to see an internal specialist tomorrow as they found something in my urin...

Jerry F · Jerry F

That is what my mind came up with last evening as I sought sleep and didn't get it right away. Why not? I am inundated with the negativity I was born into within my alcoholic/addict family. I remember my earliest thought being "I don't want to be here" and that was just before the doctor sl...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for January 15 talks about the slogan,"One Day at a Time. It suggests that in spite of our fear and anxiety we don't know what tomorrow may bring. . Leaping into the future by projecting negatively is a very destructive habit . This is is a tool that many of us have tried bec...

hotrod · hotrod

Step 1 has been posted to the Step Work Board Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! Please join in and share your thoughts. You will have to re register on t...

Bethany66 · Bethany66

I attended my weekly F2F Al-Anon meeting today and someone who shared touched on an Al-Anon book they were reading that dealt with loss. The person sharing has recently lost their spouse to alcoholism, but the sharer said that in the book on loss they speak of how the feelings of grief and loss begin fa...

chchsteak · chchsteak

so I know this sounds crazy but people have commented on it so like at work the boss was like the ...(main task) girl has a great attitude is a great worker but is always ranting. I swear she was talking about me since I know I am the only one who does that task and I do have those two good qualities. And so somet...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Blizzard and Active Alcoholic - Help! (Preview) I've posted a few times before. My AH has cirrhosis and was initially sober for over 2 years. The alcohol is back. I thought as recently as a week ago that it was an isolated incident, but it wasn't. I've been going to Al Anon since right after that happened and it has been a Godsend. I'm still new and do not y...	ShellyM	15	853	Jan 26, 2016 by milkwood
	Courage to Change Reading 1-25-2016 (Preview) The Courage to Change reading for January 25 speaks about liking the drama and the excitement of crisis in other people's lives, and ignoring our own life. By coming into Al-Anon we are encouraged to keep the focus on ourselves,talk about ourselves and not anybody else. Many of us discover that we...	hotrod	9	961	Jan 26, 2016 by Iamhere
	Alcohol Police... (Preview) I have been the alcohol police for 11 years. It is a thankless job, stressful, no benefits and the pay is low. I have decided to quit this job. I gave my two weeks notice last week.Over the years I have gone to F2F meetings for Al-anon and also AA, online meetings, read books, read message boards, etc. ...	Jen61	11	890	Jan 26, 2016 by SunshineGirl
	Milestone day :-) (Preview) Well daughter turned the big 13 today and we did just as we pleased without being beholden to anyone and, it was lovely This time last year we were staying at my mothers with no fixed address and the stress of it all had us both pretty downcast. The year before we stayed with mother at her beach house and...	missmeliss	10	724	Jan 26, 2016 by KathRN
	Moment of clarity (Preview) So Friday I had a moment of clarity. I have been racking my brain and resources trying to figure out what to do for my ABF as his birthday is this week. But then I thought about my birthday this past year and how I was so disappointed. My ABF was in jail on my bday so I decided to go visit him and supersize him as I...	ItsAllAboutMeMC	12	818	Jan 25, 2016 by KathRN
	Struggling today (Preview) Today I am visiting family and I am struggling with the memories of our life in better times. I say better times but they really were not better. My AH and I are living separately because my life living with him became unmanageable. There were his vices which were first alcohol, then grass and who knows w...	pjwa12726	8	580	Jan 25, 2016 by pjwa12726
	How to let go (Preview) Lately these days she's full of plans and they always change. Its just crazy. Found this on another members page, and can I relate. He is full of plans now and its always changing. Its just crazy. I can so relate. But how do you let that go? I need to let what he says go as his plans are forever changing. I just...	joker	7	898	Jan 25, 2016 by missmeliss
	Now that he's out of our home (Preview) Our alcoholic son, who we no longer allow to live here, still receives mail at our house. Spouse and I talked it over, and we're going to try to convince AS to get a post office box and change his address. We are willing to pay for six months' box rent up front to cut this tie he has with our home. He comes to get...	Foothold	11	880	Jan 25, 2016 by Foothold
	Courage to Change Reading 1-24-2016 (Preview) The C2C reading for January 24 speaks about being honest with ourselves and with others. It points out that we do not have to pretend to feel what we do not feel or want things that we do not want. It suggests that Al-Anon does not tell me how to behave and does not legislate right or wrong choices. It si...	hotrod	8	567	Jan 24, 2016 by Iamhere
	face to face meeting (Preview) i finally went to the Alanon meeting near my new place. It had a differnt but good vibe there. It was at 8pm so i took the bus and found the place despite anxiety. The meeting was a candlelight one. I had never attended a candle light meeting. With the lights so low, many people shared their pain and their ho...	YARNCRAZY	2	479	Jan 24, 2016 by hotrod
	Stormy weather in the Southern hemisphere! (Preview) I understand there's some blizzard conditions for many members right now, where I live it's summer but our family had it's own storm today.. Firstly found a stash of marijuana daughter had hidden.. then daughter and AH had a screaming match over financial information my daughter was refusing to sha...	Pearlgirl	5	694	Jan 24, 2016 by Iamhere
	Unsure I belong here (Preview) I dont even know if this is where i need to be so I apologize in advance I am not being directly affected by someone drinking. What is happening is my boyfriend of 2 months is in AA. I met him almost a year into sobriety. I have been trying my best to help support him even tho I dont understand what the AA 12 ste...	bedroomeyez39	6	633	Jan 24, 2016 by deacon
	Sick of the drinking (Preview) I am new here and am so worn down by my husband and daughter's drinking.. Over Christmas I witnessed my university aged daughter, who was on holiday with us, daily binge drinking with friends, whilst my husband would of an evening sink enough beer/gin to anaethetise himself comfortably and talk in re...	Pearlgirl	7	696	Jan 23, 2016 by Pearlgirl
	Trying to focus on myself but it's hard (Preview) In March it will be 2 yrs that I have been dating my A boyfriend. I knew with him being 15 yrs older there would be differences but he just seems to be changing so fast. I know some of it can be related to his ptsd and depression but I feel some he could have better control and try to get a more positive attitude....	catlover26	14	799	Jan 23, 2016 by Jerry F
	Courage to Change Reading 1-23-2016 (Preview) The C2C reading for January 23 speaks about Step Three. This is the Step where we are asked to make a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood him. The reading points out that this is a huge decision. It helps to work the Steps in order because the order in which the fi...	hotrod	4	784	Jan 23, 2016 by stillhangingon
	ABF off again (Preview) I am trying not to take this personally. ABF has gone to meet his ex-wife who he claims wants to get back together. He needs to get some paperwork from her. I just smiled and waved at him as he left. I Am trying to keep the focus on me and what I need to do for myself. He has made all kinds of promises again, we are...	joker	4	452	Jan 23, 2016 by Mirandac
	Higher Power on the job (Preview) and I was going to get lunch at McD's. While in the line a woman in front of me held out $3 and something cents and asked if I could buy her lunch and pay the difference. Okay...conference with HP and said I would taking the 3 bucks. HP asked me what do you need her 3 bucks for? Hmmmm actually I don't I t...	Jerry F	3	600	Jan 23, 2016 by Mirandac
	I am an unconventional newbie (Preview) I am new to this os if I am posting the wrong way, or in the wrong place, let me apologize in advance. When I say unconventional, the person I am trying to help is the best friend of my children. She is now 17, but in my life since she was about 3. I love her as my child. Comes from completely destructive, dysfun...	lmb2015	3	689	Jan 22, 2016 by Jerry F
	ABF relapsed-update (Preview) Well, it happened. Abf came home from work and relapsed and got very drunk on beer and double whisky drinks. He was sober for 3 months without a program. He was very very sick the next day but I did not baby him nor feel sorry for him at all. I just detached. He said all the right words, I can not do this anymore...	joker	3	624	Jan 22, 2016 by Iamhere
	Am I insane? (Preview) So I am going to try and make a long story short, or at least the cliff notes version. I have an ah; I left for a little over a year and he was sober the last 7 months, he lost 140 lbs and was doing so well, so I went back thinking things had dramatically changed, boy was I wrong, he began drinking again, he has a...	Amandasheart	9	765	Jan 22, 2016 by Jaclyn
	I Guess HP Thinks I Need a Lesson in Patience.... (Preview) So....for those who don't know, I have online stores. As such, Paypal is my payment processor by choice and by default (required on ebaY).... Needless to say, Paypal's records for me and my social do not match my SSN...so no matter how many times I send in the required documents, each year at tax time,...	Iamhere	12	615	Jan 22, 2016 by Iamhere
	getting out of the way (Preview) I started seeing a therapist who has an expertise in addiction and family counciling. He made a comment durring a session suggesting I get out of the way and let my AH experience the fallout of his drinking. My AH is functioning, and much of the fallout is showing up as issues in our marriage which in his e...	Taraxacum	11	1002	Jan 22, 2016 by KT2015
	Friends & Fam of depression (Preview) Does anyone know of any online groups like this one for friends and family of those suffering from seaver anxiety and depression?	Nightingale	5	3395	Jan 21, 2016 by gillygilly
	Courage to Change Reading 1-21-2016 (Preview) The C2C reading for January 21 speaks about being able to identify what is our business and what is not our business. It points out that prior to program we thought it was our business to help fix everything and everybody around. Al-Anon helps me to listen and learn from my own body, soul and HP. How do I d...	hotrod	6	738	Jan 21, 2016 by Taraxacum
	Control (Preview)	joker	10	793	Jan 21, 2016 by andromeda
	Is there a forum for me? (Preview) This is brand new to me, and I am very sorry that this is so long. . I am not sure if there is a place for me. I'm not an alcoholic or drug addict. Neither is my wife. But my wife's brother (age 40s) is an alcoholic and drug addict. . His job (trucker) takes him away frequently, which gives him opportunity to h...	jointdoc	20	1023	Jan 21, 2016 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change reading 1-20-2016 (Preview) The C2C reading for January 20 speaks about the principle of " anonymity". That this spiritual foundation of our traditions makes it possible for members to leave not only our surnames and all our labels and expectations outside the rooms, so we can put aside *what we are* and begin to kno...	hotrod	3	764	Jan 20, 2016 by Iamhere
	Help, he wants more physicality to feel better... (Preview) Here's the situation, it hasn't even been two solid weeks of me going to alanon to give me strength not knowledge, he came home distraught says we need to talk, to make a long story short he says because of his abandonment from when he was a child to the alcohol to not having a happy healthy relationship to...	Mylife16	6	725	Jan 20, 2016 by CoopsMom
	fear (Preview) The topic of my RL meeting this week was on fear. The moment it was introduced I wanted to run. Then we did some readings from the literature about fear. I felt like I was going to have a panic attack at times in that meeting and even though I really wanted to share I just couldn't bring myself to do it with...	KT2015	10	897	Jan 20, 2016 by LedfootJenny
	He got his one year coin, and I got a temper tantrum (Preview) Hi everyone. Major slip up last night. AH got his one year yesterday and I got a mental movie that played over all the carnage this disease has left in it's wake the last five years. ( it gets better ) I then proceeded to take his inventory, remind him of carnage, throw a tantrum and sabotage his night! N...	LedfootJenny	22	927	Jan 19, 2016 by bud
	Hope for Today Jan 19 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Today's reading speaks about the importance of sharing at meetings, both for the person who is doing the sharing and for those that are there to listen. Like the writer, the first year of meetings were difficult for me- depending on what was happening in my life, I would either...	yanksfan51	7	677	Jan 19, 2016 by bud
	Being told crazy (Preview) I attended a face to face al-anon meeting last night and it was great to share my emotions. I have also been reading a lot on this forum and its helping me feel I can do this. I had a moment of wow, when I remember being in a sick relationship with my ex-husband, ex bf's and how they use to say I was crazy. Today...	joker	2	707	Jan 19, 2016 by Debb
	Thank you + Incredible outcome (Preview) I brought all of my MIP family support, my support from my HP, and my alanon toolkit to my Dad's funeral yesterday. For years, I had imagined this moment as being a tortuous culmination of years of being a family scapegoat. What actually happened was none of that. This is another life lesson in my kee...	bud	6	781	Jan 19, 2016 by bud
	tomorrow (Preview) Tomorrow is Dad's funeral. That alone is overwhelming. My sister's stirring of the pot may have re-severed the precarious relationship with my Aunt and Uncle. It was her fabricated tales that drove them to be angry with me and history could have repeated. I know that if that's all it took for my Aun...	bud	11	751	Jan 19, 2016 by bud
	just a quote to make us think (Preview) A quote from Iman David Bowie's widow: Sometimes you will never know the true value of a moment until it becomes a memory. Food for thought. I thought it might be needed. Happy Monday!	Hoot Nanny	6	590	Jan 19, 2016 by Taraxacum
	Seeing my part (Preview) I had an ah moment yesterday. I was talking to my AFB on the phone and the conversation was happy and full of laughter. It was positive until I mentioned my daughter and her struggles. My daughter has mental health issues and lives with me and is really having a hard time with isolation, lack of motivatio...	joker	4	755	Jan 19, 2016 by Taraxacum
	Lying and I feel like a total fool (Preview) Well, I just found out my AH has not been sober since April. He's been lying and hiding it and stupid me fell for it. I found the 2 little bottles hidden yesterday, confronted him and he admitted to it. He had no choice. I feel like such a fool. Nothing is going right for us which I know is contributing to his...	JL969803	8	773	Jan 19, 2016 by CoopsMom
	The disease keeps marching on...both sides of it. (Preview) I spent some time at a clients home this afternoon that my eldest son also is doing some work for. I was no surprise that the client told me that he had learned stuff from my son about alcoholism in that my son admits to not being comfortable or in line with his new woman friends drinking. He has started...	Jerry F	6	608	Jan 19, 2016 by Tracy
	Just want to escape (Preview) Do you ever feel this way? The constant repetition of our A's bad decisions are so wearing (despite trying to use all the tools of AlAnon). Detaching with love and Letting go are "mental and emotional" escapes....distancing oneself from the turmoil of the A's life...... But wouldn't...	lgnutah	19	1026	Jan 18, 2016 by hotrod
	Afraid, Sick, Stressed, Broke, and Broken (Preview) 5 years ago I didn't know what a functioning alcoholic was. I learned after my husband retired and became a non functioning alcoholic. No reason here to go into to much detail as most of you will already know, but, here's a little background of the past 5 years. We went from a nice nest egg to over 100k in d...	whoknows	15	948	Jan 18, 2016 by Inga
	conversations with the alcoholic (Preview) I had to share this as I am seeing growth in myself. I talked with alcoholic bf yesterday and he was nice and kind toward me. I was as well. I had to laugh as he said I have done so much since I got sober. He has been sober only 3 months. He has made progress in the last year and a half. He has got himself a vehicle, g...	joker	4	766	Jan 18, 2016 by Tracy
	Hugs and support (Preview) Hi dear MIP family, I'm writing from a hotel room. I received word that my dad passed last night and so I drove a few hours to say my good byes. I collected a few momentos and my daughter who lives too far to be with me secured a room so I didn't have to drive home . My mom passed last year, the day after Xmas. ...	bud	18	895	Jan 18, 2016 by bud
	Life is good FOR TODAY (Preview) I just thought I would share a little update on my life. At this time, my life has settled down considerably. I am attending weekly al-anon meetings, an online group, and this board, all which have helped me immensely. Right now AD is in treatment with a plan to enter into recovery home following. T...	serenity47	3	591	Jan 18, 2016 by Iamhere
	The time has come (Preview) Good Morning Everyone The time has come to put everything I've learned to the test. My son will be released next month and I have decided to help him get started with a hand and love but I promised myself I will never again engage in his business. He has done well for himself in prison. He's a Per Counse...	Cathyinaz	14	877	Jan 18, 2016 by Fairlee
	Courage to Change 1-18-2016 (Preview) The C2C reading for January 18 speaks about keeping the focus on ourselves because by so doing we will discover the best way we can help an alcoholic. The reading suggests that by keeping the focus on ourselves, we are not motivated to try to change someone else's behavior and to do for others what the...	hotrod	5	866	Jan 18, 2016 by Thorn
	Verbally abusive alcoholic!!! Please help!! (Preview) I am new here and new to Al-Anon. It is about time I seek help for myself! Thank you to anyone who is reading this! I am married to an alcoholic, a daily drinker, and weekend sports watcher/total drunk. On the weekends my husband watches sports with our son, and proceeds to get wasted, becoming then l...	Inga	26	1653	Jan 18, 2016 by joker
	In a fog don't know what to do (Preview) The past few days I have just distanced myself completely tryin to be as nice as I can but I can't shake this feeling of just emptiness. Two weeks ago huge discussion between me and my A boyfriend he pretty much told me we were two different people now, that the person I fell in love with was not who he should...	Mylife16	16	966	Jan 17, 2016 by Fairlee
	Struggling with Alcoholic Ex (Preview) Had a really tough day today with my ex. I've been out of the house for about 3 weeks, and she has really been working on staying sober (and she has) and attending more meetings and using her support system, which is great. She has been holding out hope that I will "try to make it work" with her af...	Heisenberg	8	842	Jan 17, 2016 by Fairlee
	A little frustrated at the moment (Preview) Which is causing me BIG issues as far as acting out. I have actually been REALLY good considering what has been going on. I am currently dealing with a work situation that involves someone I really like as a person however as a co-worker they are completely toxic. I don't use that term lightly. This w...	SerenityRUS	5	783	Jan 17, 2016 by Fairlee
	Courage to Change Reading 1-17-2016 (Preview) The C2C reading for January 17 speaks about our interactions with the alcoholic and how irrational and unreasonable, *we can* become. It points out that because of the built up anxiety and irrational fear generated within us by living with this disease, many times we are the ones who act out, and ru...	hotrod	2	916	Jan 17, 2016 by Fairlee
	Courage to Change Reading 1-16-2016 (Preview) The C2C reading for January 16 speaks about "reacting" to situations. It points out that when a thought enters our mind we often feel that we automatically MUST speak kit. I know I though T that I had a very powerful mind as I could react instantly to any argument or situation without think...	hotrod	3	916	Jan 17, 2016 by Taraxacum
	How to stay connected (Preview) can someone offer suggestions on how to stay connected with an alcoholic when they don't want to talk? i still worry.	Themoon	9	701	Jan 16, 2016 by Freetime
	The hardships of trying to make marriage work with an alcoholic spouse (Preview) Hi Fam! I have been here reading but haven't responded in a while. I was feeling incredibly sorry for myself and had myself in a lovely, (not really) deep hole of despair. thankfully I feel as if I am climbing back out. I have been reading my Al Anon literature and lately "giving back" has real...	Fairlee	12	1003	Jan 16, 2016 by whoknows
	Mini-Meltdowns (Preview) Life is not all sunny here. About 2xs a week I have these meltdowns. I get anxious,depressed,cry alot and generally have a pity party. Last night I had a big meltdown. Ihad been looking at 30+ yrs of my diaries. I realized that I keep ending up in the same types of relationships. I keep making similar mist...	YARNCRAZY	5	710	Jan 15, 2016 by Inga
	Unable to follow through (Preview) I was to meet with a lawyer regarding my house situation but I have been to sick to do it. Found out I have another infection raging in my stomach and I am now back on another dose of antibiotics and I am in pain and very, very tired. I am to see an internal specialist tomorrow as they found something in my urin...	joker	4	527	Jan 15, 2016 by Jozie
	A 73 year old depression... (Preview) That is what my mind came up with last evening as I sought sleep and didn't get it right away. Why not? I am inundated with the negativity I was born into within my alcoholic/addict family. I remember my earliest thought being "I don't want to be here" and that was just before the doctor sl...	Jerry F	8	624	Jan 15, 2016 by Jozie
	Courage to Change 1-15-2016 (Preview) The C2C reading for January 15 talks about the slogan,"One Day at a Time. It suggests that in spite of our fear and anxiety we don't know what tomorrow may bring. . Leaping into the future by projecting negatively is a very destructive habit . This is is a tool that many of us have tried bec...	hotrod	3	625	Jan 15, 2016 by hotrod
	Step 1 (Preview) Step 1 has been posted to the Step Work Board Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! Please join in and share your thoughts. You will have to re register on t...	hotrod	4	764	Jan 15, 2016 by Jerry F
	Grief - Before and After (Preview) I attended my weekly F2F Al-Anon meeting today and someone who shared touched on an Al-Anon book they were reading that dealt with loss. The person sharing has recently lost their spouse to alcoholism, but the sharer said that in the book on loss they speak of how the feelings of grief and loss begin fa...	Bethany66	10	951	Jan 14, 2016 by Iamhere
	how to find if i am talking to myself unconciously (Preview) so I know this sounds crazy but people have commented on it so like at work the boss was like the ...(main task) girl has a great attitude is a great worker but is always ranting. I swear she was talking about me since I know I am the only one who does that task and I do have those two good qualities. And so somet...	chchsteak	2	1880	Jan 14, 2016 by hotrod
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.