The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The C2C reading for January 11 speaks about joining Al-Anon family groups and by dong so having finally" found a second family". In his new family we are accepted, just as we are. We don't have to pretend or wear a mask over our feelings. We can speak freely and know that our words will not leave the room. People empathize when I share my troubles and do not try to solve my problems for me. They give me the dignity to do so on my own. In this new family, love is not a point system. I don't have to earn love from others as it is given freely as a gift. I don't have to earn my place in the sun so that I can just relax and be myself.
Today's reminder states that when we find ourselves dealing with the disease of alcoholism in our family ,it is a powerful experience to walk into an Al-Anon meeting and connect with a supportive family that will always be there.
The quote is from," Al-Anon Faces Alcoholism"; "for me alcoholism has proven to be a bittersweet legacy-- bitter because of the pain I suffered, and sweet because if it weren't for that pain, I wouldn't have searched for and found a better way of living."
I agree completely with this sentence. Each member of my alanon, MIP family, holds a special place in my heart and I am oh so grateful.
morning, what stuck out for me in this reading was, " I don't have to earn my place in the sun..." That really hit the nail on the head for me because I think for much of my life that is what I had been doing, trying to earn or "buy" my way into someone's heart... I say "buy" because before my 12 step, I didn't realize just how much of a compulsive gift-giver I was. However, although I realize all this, it's still been hard just trying to be myself because I am still discovering what that means and trying to do so without giving material gifts, and instead, just trying to focus on the gift of friendship in and of itself.
Welcome Lolosmom. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this C2C reading. I can so identify with your discovery about having" to earn someone's love and the effort to just be in a relationship without having to earn it. Alanon meetings and friendships have helped me in this endeavor.
Keep coming back.
Betty - thanks for the daily and your ESH! I too spent way too much time trying to earn my place in the sun. I did not realize how much of my life has been spent worker harder and harder for that 'gold star' and not finding any peace or joy. So, so grateful for my Al-Anon family - in many ways, it's so much closer to me than my blood family.
Lolosmom - I too welcome you to MIP! Glad you found us and glad you found your courage to join in!
Make it a great day everyone!!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
I am resonating with the bitter-sweetness of this time in my life. I am both sad and joyful. Sad because I realized how much hurt I have invited into my life and joyful at the prospect of what is next for me as I focus on my recovery.
I am so thankful for the safe places created by alanon where I can feel loved and supported while I solve my own problems.
