Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

bobump · bobump

Some of you know that I was anxious about the appointment I had with my wife’s addiction therapist and her. She was feeling pretty bold because the last visit he told her that I was controlling and my daughters therapist told her that me not giving her money is abusive and grounds for divorce. &...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

Since coming to Al Anon and listening to the dialogue in F2F meetings and reading the posts here I realize that no one can tell me what I should or shouldn't do. HP gives us free will to decide what we will do and not do. So, why do I feel like my whole life I've made decisions based on what other'...

nmike · nmike

Hi all, My A has moved out. He says he wants a divorce. He says he will never change and has given in to the disease. He doesn't drink but has many other addictions like computer games. It has been so difficult trying to cope with this new life that was not my choice. We try to talk but end up screaming at eac...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Nobody can give you freedom. Nobody can give you equality or justice or anything. If you're a man, you take it. --Malcolm X It does little good to complain about our mates or parents or lovers. We only accentuate our role as victims when we say, "I would be happier if he/she were different." "If he wo...

WakingUp · WakingUp

I finally spoke with my daughter last night about when she would be moving out and about doing some chores until she does. There are lots of "ifs" in this, since she has no place to go until she has a job & some money. I told her I'd like to see her up looking for a job in the morning whe...

Vermont635a · Vermont635a

I am an old time member, 18 years, not that it matters. I am dealing with dry drunk behavior. It had stopped for a long time. I've forgotten all the little tools to detach and how to survive without being blown away with every nastiness. many thanks.

camra · camra

ok someone help me out here I was just banned from the chat room.... Why was that??? please help me .. Thanks camra

kitty · kitty

Some ppl I see in the room, I never see on the Boards & vice versa. I come to the Boards to vent naturally but usually I am looking for the ESH from others. I go to the ch rm to vent wildly - but it's so funny to me how one sentence or two & ppl start to talk back, make their comments when they have neve...

Christy · Christy

The writer composed the attached video/song after a true experience that took place. Please take a moment to see it and reflect. A huge "Thank You" to all our veterans. Christy A Pittance of Time

Emmie11 · Emmie11

My sponsor has ingrained in my head how crucial it is to look at my motives before taking any action or making any decision. My motives are are the seeds from which all my actions sprout. I can either plant flowers that beautify my surroundings and bring&nbs...

jpembert · jpembert

Here it is a friday night ny A is in bed with his drink next to him. I'm sitting alone doing nothing but thinking. That all I do these day is think about how all this happened. They say you don't cause a person to drink but he was not like this when we married 26 years ago what happened the girls are away for the w...

sandie123 · sandie123

Well I finally got up the nerve to ask someone else to be my f2f sponsor. She said Yes!!! I don't know where this will take me or if she is the right one... but she is a start! Today was a good day. I took care of myself... stayed in bed till 11:30, took a bubble bath with music and candles (wow, never did tha...

mastiff · mastiff

Funny thing, i ordered a new/used "dillema of the alcoholic marriage" book, and inside it was a clipping from an article about resentments. I can see what the person before me held on to it as it is a great reading so i thought i'd share it with you all too. Resent Somebody "The moment you begin...

Lauren ashley · Lauren ashley

Ok ...like right now my soab gramma said I have to get off the pc...OMG I go on to express my feeling instead of lashing my anger out on myself..because I am self injuring at times...So this is definetely an outlet I use to cope with my living conditions,and depression(which is anger turned inw...

sunny1 · sunny1

So, I went to the first night of my "retreat" or so I thought, it is actually a self motivation course, not what I thought at all. Well I did know that we were going to do some self exploration but not to the depth of it. Im staying at the hotel where it is taking place and I was glad to be finished a...

Gailey · Gailey

I now have my A son living with me. I have an in-law apt. next to my home for guest and he is staying there. He is in an intensive outpatient program now which he goes to for 3 hours a day...4 days a week. He really likes it. My problem of course, is me. I want to constantly talk to him about reconciling with his f...

bob6502 · bob6502

Heya my wonderful friends, Just for today, I wanted to express my gratitude for all the wonders of my life. Just for today, I have you my wonderful friends, to help guide me through my recovery. Just for today, I have life, breathe, and happiness. Just for today, I can smell the popcorn my son is...

nycbt · nycbt

My husband has been after me to take a loan out of the bank so he can buy a truck. Mind you he has the money but he doesn't want to give the person the cash. Well I told him to use the money that he has that I wouldn't be helping him. He has been pressuring me alot waiting for me to break. I am getting close to that ti...

Kim · Kim

My A came last night to pick up some linens to move into the sober house. I put together a few things that were his when he moved in (that's about all he brought along with his clothes) and he spoke, I listened. I had very little to say. He asked how I felt about him staying at the sober house. I sa...

nycbt · nycbt

Hi I live with an active alchoic. When he is not drinking he is the best friend. He listen he is funny, he cuddles with me at night. He loves to give hugs. Those are things I love about him. He does the cooking and he does the bills. Those are too things I do not do. He helps clean he never wants me to do all of it. H...

nycbt · nycbt

Yesterday was a good night we spent the time talking and watching tv. Those are the days are love and then I remeber why I got married. But then there are days like Sunday and Tuesday that make me wonder why I am in this mess. However I am getting stronger and I am getting more help from people that has helped...

UncleLou · UncleLou

My kids had off school today and tomorrow. My ex took my daughter to work today and I was going to bring my son (14) with me. We told him he could earn some money helping, a basement renovation. I thought he would like to opportunity to earn some money, he's been asking for a job lately. This morning he said h...

Barbara · Barbara

My A doesnt fool around on me My A doesnt gamble My A doesnt drive drunk My A doesnt do cocaine My A doesnt hit me/us My A sits in the finished basement and drinks. I watch him get drunk. When I hear other peoples stories I think my A isnt that bad so why do I need to go to F2F to hear their stories? Can a...

captcodee · captcodee

The last two days have been a true test to my program. I am sure many of you have heard me brag that I have found a great place of serenity, even though my husband is still drinking/using. That peaceful place has been challenged very hard the last two days. I try very hard to remember that I am n...

sunny1 · sunny1

Hi all, Well Im off on a weekend retreat, leaving tonight at 6pm my time. I was given a list of items to bring with me and was told to think about one topic that I would like to focus on. That's a hard one for me....I have so many things that I would like to change, improve or think about....

kitty · kitty

Almighty Master, Physician of our Souls bodies, You alone are prompt to defend us; quickly visit Your suffering servant Mother Earth. In Your mercy, deliver us all from sickness, bitterness, pain, suffering, relapse & poor choices. Heal us now, so that we may sing p...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Ok all, I got this at work and it made me laugh. Some of us share the same sense of humor, so I am hoping that I do not offend anyone. All hair removal methods have tricked women with their promises of easy, painless removal - The epilady, scissors, razors, Nair and now...the...

Lauren ashley · Lauren ashley

I am soo kinda happy because I have been going to my moms house for the past three days..I haven't seen her since summer time. I refused to see her because she chose to drink,and I just did not want to be a part of it.. The first two days i was kinda like w/e im gonna c my mom..today we actually had...

Kim · Kim

I started the day worrying about my A. I ended my day doing things for me. I had taken the day off...started like Isaid calling my A and worrying about where he slept last night...byt the time he called me back this afternoon I had thought over things and realized I have nothing good to say to him rig...

cedarpines · cedarpines

Hey folks, Just an update - haven't been on for awhile - if I have, it's been short to catch a meeting. I'm going crazy getting ready to move - going through stuff -OM gosh - where does it all come from? I've managed to mostly clean daughter's room - get stuffed animals & keepsakes into...

jonibaloni21 · jonibaloni21

Well, I don't know if I'm really following the program or not, to me this is my way of detaching, but I wrote my A an email tonite. Last night, I called him to ask him a question and we talked for a few minutes and then he said hey I'm gonna go , I'm not much on talking on the phone, so see ya later. I said okeeee....

chrissy · chrissy

my husband just called said he left his moms already for today. he doent start work until 830am i heard a radio so i knew he was not home. he said he wants to come home he won't do it again he misses me. the two of us are so torn i am so drained i went to bed so early. i could have slept until 7 but the phone wok...

sallyb · sallyb

I remembered today that I used to think I was lucky to be living my life. The last time I thought that was far too long ago. I want to feel that way again, I think I am ready.

captcodee · captcodee

It is so windy here today. I come from a very windy place, but recently moved away. I have been feeling very lonesome, but not able to go home.

As I sit here I suddenly hear the rush of the wind through a small crack in my office window. (How blessed I am that I have a win...

Magpie · Magpie

Hi everyone, I really think that I will not be able to continue to live like this (with an active A) for the long term. I have a good job, have family close by for support, and I could do it on my own if I finally make that decision. I think the biggest thing concerning me right now is wha...

chrissy · chrissy

every friday i go through the same crappy nightmare. will he screw up again? i know with all the scary stuff i went through with amanda ,that i should relax. i went to sleep and woke up with such a migraine & i havent heard from my a since 1130:pm he said he would call me when he got to his mom...

JulieLynn · JulieLynn

You know when I first met my husband over three years ago I can remember a time I couldn't wait to get home to him. I wanted to spend every waking hour with him. It's not like that anymore and I feel such guilt. I love my husband but so much has happened and I'm still harboring some resentment...

Diane43 · Diane43

Hi Everyone, When alcoholism affects our lives, it is very difficult to stay calm, so I thought I would share this. I know for myself I need to fear less and not worry about the future. Commandments for calm living: Thou shalt not worry, for worry is the most unproductive of all huma...

jonibaloni21 · jonibaloni21

I am so very mixed up or something. since my friend Donna died, I can't get with the program, I can't sit still, I can't stay in a meeting for the full time, I'm bored, I'm fidgeting, I'm restless. I think why her? why not me? I am just about to EXPLODE!!!! I can't get the feelings out, no one will listen and ca...

Satori · Satori

Just received this in an email from another friend in recovery...you may enjoy it too. I asked God to take away my habit. God said, No. It is not for me to take away, but for you to give it up. I asked God to make my handicapped child whole. God said, No. His Spirit is whole, his body is only tempora...

Barbara · Barbara

Seems alot of my thinking has been step related even though Im not "officially" working the steps. Is it actually a mix? different times doing different steps?

Kim · Kim

So, this morning I try to call him about driving him to rehab...I was home waiting...although I am sick as well with a viral thing and was out from work yesterday so i was home but had to go in for a meeting today after 12...He didn't answer the phone and of course I thought the worst. 10 minutes later I get a c...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

last night i looked over my diary from over the past two years. the only stuff i ever wrote in it was all the lousy stuff my a did to me and how lousy i felt and how my life was so wrong. the thoughts of when i was suicidal. basically the whole thing was written about my a and how i let everything he ever did make me...

nycbt · nycbt

I have some growing pains going on inside me. My sponsor who I love to death is helping me but it is hard to do. I am going to do what she asks me because I want to get better. Like writing done all my obessives thought. I am planning on getting a notebook because I have alot of obessive thoughts. Writing down e...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

^Lucy · ^Lucy

The drama of other people's problems can be very distracting, but in Al-Anon we discover that the problem does not lie solely within another person, the problem lies within us. The behavior of a friend, spouse, child, sibling, parent may have led us to alanon but we soon realize that o...

JulieLynn · JulieLynn

In previous post I talked about leaving my husband and being gone for 6weeks. I have since returned. While cleaning the house I came across a receipt for oxycodone written to a lady I believe works with my husband in our bedroom. There was also a message on our answering machine that my hus...

sunny1 · sunny1

good morning all, okay so heres the deal, I can not let this one go.... yesterday I posted about the dog, Im going to a retret this weekend and my bf was having issues about where the dog is going. thx to all your comments I have decided to give him to my brother and wife, who are real dog lovers, th...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Belonging And Connecting We have powerful desires to belong and to connect with a special someone. We inherited a model for marriage and relationships that has remained largely unchanged for over 50 years. That traditional model was never intended to integrate our individual needs with th...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

A SENSE OF BELONGING Perhaps one of the greatest rewards of meditation and prayer is the sense of belonging that comes to us. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 105 That's what it is -- belonging! After a session of meditation I knew that the feeling I was experiencing was a sense of belonging b...

Barbara · Barbara

central MA?

Kim · Kim

I'm having a hard time since he didn't go to rehab. I'm sick to my stomach. I didn't think it would be affecting me this way. I'm angry at him, the insurance companies and a variety of others....but mostly I am angry at myself. I am obsessing again....worried about about every little thing he does. I feel...

captcodee · captcodee

This is an important part of the suggested closing in alanon. "Take what you like, and leave the rest" Many people in recovery, weather it be Alanon, or AA, or any program, are coming from a terrible place, a place where we all were once ourselves. It is hard to break some of the nasty di...

hudsond · hudsond

Things are going o.k. I'm just not in a good mood this week. My a hasn't gone to meetings this week because he is very busy with work. I understand this, but I am still frustrateda and scared, because when he doesn't go that gets his stinkin' thinkin' going again. He gets grouc...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Beliefs about Money I was starting a new job for a corporation. I was good at what I did for a living. The personnel manager and I were down to the details of employment, and he asked me how much money I believed I deserved. I thought about it and came up with a figure of $400 a month. This was back in the...

tea2 · tea2

Hello - I will be unable to do this Friday's AM meeting. I am posting this as a friendly reminder and a "Thank You" to whoever takes over

Have a Great Day, Wishes, Tea2

Lauren ashley · Lauren ashley

I have to go to therapy right now............grrrr i fuckin hate therapy..its boring and my therapist is a bitch..she bitched that I go to alanon..and not alateen..I said well at least I am going somewhere to help me....I told her I wanted a new therapist,and shes like why..I said just becau...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

i just read a bunch of replies to someones post about what life was like living with an active a. many people said that they live separate lives from their a and are happy. so my question is are all of you just existing in a relationship? or are your need actually being fullfilled? is there still intimacy?...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Hi all, Everytime someone is asked about what one thing they would like to change in the world, most people answer "World Peace". That is all well and good, but I would say "a cure for alcoholism/addiction". A belief I have is that curing that would have a domino affect and many issues we have would go a...

chrissy · chrissy

Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (Alcohol Dependence) by Debra Wood, RNDefinition Alcohol abuse is a disease that involves desire for alcohol and continuing to drink even when faced with alcohol-related job, legal, social, health, or family problems. Alcohol abuse can progress to alcoholism...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	I made it thru the a's therapist appt. (Preview) Some of you know that I was anxious about the appointment I had with my wife’s addiction therapist and her. She was feeling pretty bold because the last visit he told her that I was controlling and my daughters therapist told her that me not giving her money is abusive and grounds for divorce. &...	bobump	4	398	Nov 12, 2005 by canadianguy
	My Life Is Worth More Than This... (Preview) Since coming to Al Anon and listening to the dialogue in F2F meetings and reading the posts here I realize that no one can tell me what I should or shouldn't do. HP gives us free will to decide what we will do and not do. So, why do I feel like my whole life I've made decisions based on what other'...	twinmom2	6	515	Nov 12, 2005 by kissers
	On overwhelm but gaining insights (Preview) Hi all, My A has moved out. He says he wants a divorce. He says he will never change and has given in to the disease. He doesn't drink but has many other addictions like computer games. It has been so difficult trying to cope with this new life that was not my choice. We try to talk but end up screaming at eac...	nmike	2	405	Nov 12, 2005 by WakingUp
	nobody's gonna GIVE me justice!! i must TAKE it!!! (Preview) *Nobody can give you freedom. Nobody can give you equality or justice or anything. If you're a man, you take it. --Malcolm X* It does little good to complain about our mates or parents or lovers. We only accentuate our role as victims when we say, "I would be happier if he/she were different." "If he wo...	rosie light shines	1	371	Nov 12, 2005 by kitty
	I Did It (Preview) I finally spoke with my daughter last night about when she would be moving out and about doing some chores until she does. There are lots of "ifs" in this, since she has no place to go until she has a job & some money. I told her I'd like to see her up looking for a job in the morning whe...	WakingUp	6	426	Nov 12, 2005 by WakingUp
	Dry Drunk (Preview) I am an old time member, 18 years, not that it matters. I am dealing with dry drunk behavior. It had stopped for a long time. I've forgotten all the little tools to detach and how to survive without being blown away with every nastiness. many thanks.	Vermont635a	2	411	Nov 12, 2005 by lin0606
	banned (Preview) ok someone help me out here I was just banned from the chat room.... Why was that??? please help me .. Thanks camra	camra	2	404	Nov 12, 2005 by camra
	the chat rm is strange sometimes (Preview) Some ppl I see in the room, I never see on the Boards & vice versa. I come to the Boards to vent naturally but usually I am looking for the ESH from others. I go to the ch rm to vent wildly - but it's so funny to me how one sentence or two & ppl start to talk back, make their comments when they have neve...	kitty	8	497	Nov 12, 2005 by jonibaloni21
	In rememberance of our Vets... (Preview) The writer composed the attached video/song after a true experience that took place. Please take a moment to see it and reflect. A huge "Thank You" to all our veterans. Christy A Pittance of Time	Christy	7	775	Nov 12, 2005 by nmike
	Thought for the Day/Motives (Preview) My sponsor has ingrained in my head how crucial it is to look at my motives before taking any action or making any decision. My motives are are the seeds from which all my actions sprout. I can either plant flowers that beautify my surroundings and bring&nbs...	Emmie11	1	424	Nov 12, 2005 by hopefortoday
	just another night (Preview) Here it is a friday night ny A is in bed with his drink next to him. I'm sitting alone doing nothing but thinking. That all I do these day is think about how all this happened. They say you don't cause a person to drink but he was not like this when we married 26 years ago what happened the girls are away for the w...	jpembert	1	326	Nov 11, 2005 by Lauren ashley
	I got up the nerve!!! (Preview) Well I finally got up the nerve to ask someone else to be my f2f sponsor. She said Yes!!! I don't know where this will take me or if she is the right one... but she is a start! Today was a good day. I took care of myself... stayed in bed till 11:30, took a bubble bath with music and candles (wow, never did tha...	sandie123	7	619	Nov 11, 2005 by lmt123
	resentments are slave drivers (Preview) Funny thing, i ordered a new/used "dillema of the alcoholic marriage" book, and inside it was a clipping from an article about resentments. I can see what the person before me held on to it as it is a great reading so i thought i'd share it with you all too. Resent Somebody "The moment you begin...	mastiff	7	420	Nov 11, 2005 by Emmie11
	I can't do this anymore...I am gonna loose it pretty darn soon (Preview) Ok ...like right now my soab gramma said I have to get off the pc...OMG I go on to express my feeling instead of lashing my anger out on myself..because I am self injuring at times...So this is definetely an outlet I use to cope with my living conditions,and depression(which is anger turned inw...	Lauren ashley	9	612	Nov 11, 2005 by rosie light shines
	light bulb moment (Preview) So, I went to the first night of my "retreat" or so I thought, it is actually a self motivation course, not what I thought at all. Well I did know that we were going to do some self exploration but not to the depth of it. Im staying at the hotel where it is taking place and I was glad to be finished a...	sunny1	2	360	Nov 11, 2005 by Emmie11
	Too many questions!!! (Preview) I now have my A son living with me. I have an in-law apt. next to my home for guest and he is staying there. He is in an intensive outpatient program now which he goes to for 3 hours a day...4 days a week. He really likes it. My problem of course, is me. I want to constantly talk to him about reconciling with his f...	Gailey	6	467	Nov 11, 2005 by Emmie11
	Just for Today Gratitude (Preview) Heya my wonderful friends, Just for today, I wanted to express my gratitude for all the wonders of my life. Just for today, I have you my wonderful friends, to help guide me through my recovery. Just for today, I have life, breathe, and happiness. Just for today, I can smell the popcorn my son is...	bob6502	1	363	Nov 11, 2005 by Emmie11
	Hard night (Preview) My husband has been after me to take a loan out of the bank so he can buy a truck. Mind you he has the money but he doesn't want to give the person the cash. Well I told him to use the money that he has that I wouldn't be helping him. He has been pressuring me alot waiting for me to break. I am getting close to that ti...	nycbt	10	409	Nov 11, 2005 by Christy
	another small triumph (Preview) My A came last night to pick up some linens to move into the sober house. I put together a few things that were his when he moved in (that's about all he brought along with his clothes) and he spoke, I listened. I had very little to say. He asked how I felt about him staying at the sober house. I sa...	Kim	4	390	Nov 11, 2005 by canadianguy
	things i love about my husband (Preview) Hi I live with an active alchoic. When he is not drinking he is the best friend. He listen he is funny, he cuddles with me at night. He loves to give hugs. Those are things I love about him. He does the cooking and he does the bills. Those are too things I do not do. He helps clean he never wants me to do all of it. H...	nycbt	5	658	Nov 11, 2005 by marmare
	GOOD NIGHT (Preview) Yesterday was a good night we spent the time talking and watching tv. Those are the days are love and then I remeber why I got married. But then there are days like Sunday and Tuesday that make me wonder why I am in this mess. However I am getting stronger and I am getting more help from people that has helped...	nycbt	3	359	Nov 11, 2005 by marmare
	More insanity at home (Preview) My kids had off school today and tomorrow. My ex took my daughter to work today and I was going to bring my son (14) with me. We told him he could earn some money helping, a basement renovation. I thought he would like to opportunity to earn some money, he's been asking for a job lately. This morning he said h...	UncleLou	5	423	Nov 11, 2005 by TLC2
	anyone else with the "at home" drinker? (Preview) My A doesnt fool around on me My A doesnt gamble My A doesnt drive drunk My A doesnt do cocaine My A doesnt hit me/us My A sits in the finished basement and drinks. I watch him get drunk. When I hear other peoples stories I think my A isnt that bad so why do I need to go to F2F to hear their stories? Can a...	Barbara	6	847	Nov 11, 2005 by bcanuck
	Not sure if I am okay (Preview) The last two days have been a true test to my program. I am sure many of you have heard me brag that I have found a great place of serenity, even though my husband is still drinking/using. That peaceful place has been challenged very hard the last two days. I try very hard to remember that I am n...	captcodee	3	530	Nov 11, 2005 by WakingUp
	My Journal.... (Preview) Hi all, Well Im off on a weekend retreat, leaving tonight at 6pm my time. I was given a list of items to bring with me and was told to think about one topic that I would like to focus on. That's a hard one for me....I have so many things that I would like to change, improve or think about....	sunny1	5	333	Nov 11, 2005 by leo
	a prayer for all of us (Preview) Almighty Master, Physician of our Souls bodies, You alone are prompt to defend us; quickly visit Your suffering servant Mother Earth. In Your mercy, deliver us all from sickness, bitterness, pain, suffering, relapse & poor choices. Heal us now, so that we may sing p...	kitty	1	462	Nov 11, 2005 by kitty
	Waxing! (Funny) (Preview) Ok all, I got this at work and it made me laugh. Some of us share the same sense of humor, so I am hoping that I do not offend anyone. All hair removal methods have tricked women with their promises of easy, painless removal - The epilady, scissors, razors, Nair and now...the...	Dolphin123	12	2934	Nov 11, 2005 by kitty
	I tried...... (Preview) I am soo kinda happy because I have been going to my moms house for the past three days..I haven't seen her since summer time. I refused to see her because she chose to drink,and I just did not want to be a part of it.. The first two days i was kinda like w/e im gonna c my mom..today we actually had...	Lauren ashley	4	677	Nov 11, 2005 by bubbles1990
	The rest of the day was about me (Preview) I started the day worrying about my A. I ended my day doing things for me. I had taken the day off...started like Isaid calling my A and worrying about where he slept last night...byt the time he called me back this afternoon I had thought over things and realized I have nothing good to say to him rig...	Kim	4	568	Nov 11, 2005 by bubbles1990
	Moving out & Moving On (Preview) Hey folks, Just an update - haven't been on for awhile - if I have, it's been short to catch a meeting. I'm going crazy getting ready to move - going through stuff -OM gosh - where does it all come from? I've managed to mostly clean daughter's room - get stuffed animals & keepsakes into...	cedarpines	3	874	Nov 11, 2005 by bubbles1990
	email to my A (Preview) Well, I don't know if I'm really following the program or not, to me this is my way of detaching, but I wrote my A an email tonite. Last night, I called him to ask him a question and we talked for a few minutes and then he said hey I'm gonna go , I'm not much on talking on the phone, so see ya later. I said okeeee....	jonibaloni21	2	347	Nov 11, 2005 by bubbles1990
	my a just called at 530am (Preview) my husband just called said he left his moms already for today. he doent start work until 830am i heard a radio so i knew he was not home. he said he wants to come home he won't do it again he misses me. the two of us are so torn i am so drained i went to bed so early. i could have slept until 7 but the phone wok...	chrissy	6	664	Nov 10, 2005 by marmare
	The beauty of every day (Preview) I remembered today that I used to think I was lucky to be living my life. The last time I thought that was far too long ago. I want to feel that way again, I think I am ready.	sallyb	2	463	Nov 10, 2005 by marmare
	Do you like the wind?? (Preview) It is so windy here today. I come from a very windy place, but recently moved away. I have been feeling very lonesome, but not able to go home. As I sit here I suddenly hear the rush of the wind through a small crack in my office window. (How blessed I am that I have a win...	captcodee	2	679	Nov 10, 2005 by Karilynn
	Question about custody arrangements for those separated from A with kids (Preview) Hi everyone, I really think that I will not be able to continue to live like this (with an active A) for the long term. I have a good job, have family close by for support, and I could do it on my own if I finally make that decision. I think the biggest thing concerning me right now is wha...	Magpie	5	624	Nov 10, 2005 by bcanuck
	i feel like ive been beaten up friday sucks (Preview) every friday i go through the same crappy nightmare. will he screw up again? i know with all the scary stuff i went through with amanda ,that i should relax. i went to sleep and woke up with such a migraine & i havent heard from my a since 1130:pm he said he would call me when he got to his mom...	chrissy	8	698	Nov 10, 2005 by UncleLou
	Does It Get Any Better??? (Preview) You know when I first met my husband over three years ago I can remember a time I couldn't wait to get home to him. I wanted to spend every waking hour with him. It's not like that anymore and I feel such guilt. I love my husband but so much has happened and I'm still harboring some resentment...	JulieLynn	7	406	Nov 10, 2005 by ODAT
	Commandments for calm living (Preview) Hi Everyone, When alcoholism affects our lives, it is very difficult to stay calm, so I thought I would share this. I know for myself I need to fear less and not worry about the future. Commandments for calm living: Thou shalt not worry, for worry is the most unproductive of all huma...	Diane43	6	867	Nov 10, 2005 by Kim
	I'm Not Alright (Preview) I am so very mixed up or something. since my friend Donna died, I can't get with the program, I can't sit still, I can't stay in a meeting for the full time, I'm bored, I'm fidgeting, I'm restless. I think why her? why not me? I am just about to EXPLODE!!!! I can't get the feelings out, no one will listen and ca...	jonibaloni21	10	866	Nov 10, 2005 by Lauren ashley
	God said, No. (Preview) Just received this in an email from another friend in recovery...you may enjoy it too. I asked God to take away my habit. God said, No. It is not for me to take away, but for you to give it up. I asked God to make my handicapped child whole. God said, No. His Spirit is whole, his body is only tempora...	Satori	4	608	Nov 10, 2005 by Lauren ashley
	can you actually be working the steps w/out formally realizing youre doing so? (Preview) Seems alot of my thinking has been step related even though Im not "officially" working the steps. Is it actually a mix? different times doing different steps?	Barbara	7	814	Nov 10, 2005 by Jeannie
	so he didn't go to rehab... (Preview) So, this morning I try to call him about driving him to rehab...I was home waiting...although I am sick as well with a viral thing and was out from work yesterday so i was home but had to go in for a meeting today after 12...He didn't answer the phone and of course I thought the worst. 10 minutes later I get a c...	Kim	4	740	Nov 10, 2005 by Jeannie
	a way to let go of the past (Preview) last night i looked over my diary from over the past two years. the only stuff i ever wrote in it was all the lousy stuff my a did to me and how lousy i felt and how my life was so wrong. the thoughts of when i was suicidal. basically the whole thing was written about my a and how i let everything he ever did make me...	notsonew1111	4	405	Nov 10, 2005 by sunny1
	Growing PAINS (Preview) I have some growing pains going on inside me. My sponsor who I love to death is helping me but it is hard to do. I am going to do what she asks me because I want to get better. Like writing done all my obessives thought. I am planning on getting a notebook because I have alot of obessive thoughts. Writing down e...	nycbt	2	450	Nov 10, 2005 by nmike
	dont wait (Preview)	notsonew1111	1	310	Nov 10, 2005 by Dolphin123
	Gossip and Backstabbing- Yes, this means U (Preview) The drama of other people's problems can be very distracting, but in Al-Anon we discover that the problem does not lie solely within another person, the problem lies within us. The behavior of a friend, spouse, child, sibling, parent may have led us to alanon but we soon realize that o...	^Lucy	12	932	Nov 10, 2005 by ^Lucy
	I need some input (Preview) In previous post I talked about leaving my husband and being gone for 6weeks. I have since returned. While cleaning the house I came across a receipt for oxycodone written to a lady I believe works with my husband in our bedroom. There was also a message on our answering machine that my hus...	JulieLynn	10	446	Nov 10, 2005 by cidboy
	the dog.... (Preview) good morning all, okay so heres the deal, I can not let this one go.... yesterday I posted about the dog, Im going to a retret this weekend and my bf was having issues about where the dog is going. thx to all your comments I have decided to give him to my brother and wife, who are real dog lovers, th...	sunny1	6	364	Nov 10, 2005 by Diva
	belonging and connecting....what do YOU guys think??? (Preview) Belonging And Connecting We have powerful desires to belong and to connect with a special someone. We inherited a model for marriage and relationships that has remained largely unchanged for over 50 years. That traditional model was never intended to integrate our individual needs with th...	rosie light shines	3	464	Nov 10, 2005 by notsonew1111
	damn it!! i DO belong (Preview) A SENSE OF BELONGING Perhaps one of the greatest rewards of meditation and prayer is the sense of belonging that comes to us. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 105 That's what it is -- belonging! After a session of meditation I knew that the feeling I was experiencing was a sense of belonging b...	rosie light shines	1	580	Nov 10, 2005 by kitty
	anyone on here from Massachusetts? (Preview) central MA?	Barbara	3	468	Nov 10, 2005 by rosie light shines
	Anger has got a hold on me (Preview) I'm having a hard time since he didn't go to rehab. I'm sick to my stomach. I didn't think it would be affecting me this way. I'm angry at him, the insurance companies and a variety of others....but mostly I am angry at myself. I am obsessing again....worried about about every little thing he does. I feel...	Kim	5	653	Nov 10, 2005 by rosie light shines
	Take what you like, and leave the rest (Preview) This is an important part of the suggested closing in alanon. *"Take what you like, and leave the rest"* Many people in recovery, weather it be Alanon, or AA, or any program, are coming from a terrible place, a place where we all were once ourselves. It is hard to break some of the nasty di...	captcodee	4	1718	Nov 10, 2005 by rosie light shines
	Tired and have the blahs (Preview) Things are going o.k. I'm just not in a good mood this week. My a hasn't gone to meetings this week because he is very busy with work. I understand this, but I am still frustrateda and scared, because when he doesn't go that gets his stinkin' thinkin' going again. He gets grouc...	hudsond	4	349	Nov 10, 2005 by hudsond
	BOY, i am really showing you all my heart!!! would love ESH (Preview) Beliefs about Money I was starting a new job for a corporation. I was good at what I did for a living. The personnel manager and I were down to the details of employment, and he asked me how much money I believed I deserved. I thought about it and came up with a figure of $400 a month. This was back in the...	rosie light shines	1	561	Nov 10, 2005 by kitty
	Friday,11/11 OP Needed for AM Meeting (Preview) Hello - I will be unable to do this Friday's AM meeting. I am posting this as a friendly reminder and a "Thank You" to whoever takes over Have a Great Day, Wishes, Tea2	tea2	0	291	Nov 10, 2005 by tea2
	this sux (Preview) I have to go to therapy right now............grrrr i fuckin hate therapy..its boring and my therapist is a bitch..she bitched that I go to alanon..and not alateen..I said well at least I am going somewhere to help me....I told her I wanted a new therapist,and shes like why..I said just becau...	Lauren ashley	11	636	Nov 10, 2005 by Christy
	question to all who have stayed (Preview) i just read a bunch of replies to someones post about what life was like living with an active a. many people said that they live separate lives from their a and are happy. so my question is are all of you just existing in a relationship? or are your need actually being fullfilled? is there still intimacy?...	notsonew1111	12	810	Nov 10, 2005 by nycbt
	If I had one wish (Preview) Hi all, Everytime someone is asked about what one thing they would like to change in the world, most people answer "World Peace". That is all well and good, but I would say "a cure for alcoholism/addiction". A belief I have is that curing that would have a domino affect and many issues we have would go a...	Dolphin123	4	621	Nov 10, 2005 by nycbt
	i know we probaly know this already but may be it could help (Preview) Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (Alcohol Dependence) by Debra Wood, RNDefinition Alcohol abuse is a disease that involves desire for alcohol and continuing to drink even when faced with alcohol-related job, legal, social, health, or family problems. Alcohol abuse can progress to alcoholism...	chrissy	2	604	Nov 10, 2005 by chrissy
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.