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I made it thru the a's therapist appt.
(Preview)
Some of you know that I was anxious about the appointment I had with my wife’s addiction therapist and her. She was feeling pretty bold because the last visit he told her that I was controlling and my daughters therapist told her that me not giving her money is abusive and grounds for divorce.
&...
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bobump
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4
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398
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My Life Is Worth More Than This...
(Preview)
Since coming to Al Anon and listening to the dialogue in F2F meetings and reading the posts here I realize that no one can tell me what I should or shouldn't do. HP gives us free will to decide what we will do and not do. So, why do I feel like my whole life I've made decisions based on what other'...
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twinmom2
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6
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515
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On overwhelm but gaining insights
(Preview)
Hi all,
My A has moved out. He says he wants a divorce. He says he will never change and has given in to the disease. He doesn't drink but has many other addictions like computer games. It has been so difficult trying to cope with this new life that was not my choice. We try to talk but end up screaming at eac...
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nmike
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2
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405
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nobody's gonna GIVE me justice!! i must TAKE it!!!
(Preview)
Nobody can give you freedom. Nobody can give you equality or justice or anything. If you're a man, you take it. --Malcolm X
It does little good to complain about our mates or parents or lovers. We only accentuate our role as victims when we say, "I would be happier if he/she were different." "If he wo...
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rosie light shines
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1
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371
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I Did It
(Preview)
I finally spoke with my daughter last night about when she would be moving out and about doing some chores until she does. There are lots of "ifs" in this, since she has no place to go until she has a job & some money. I told her I'd like to see her up looking for a job in the morning whe...
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WakingUp
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6
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426
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Dry Drunk
(Preview)
I am an old time member, 18 years, not that it matters. I am dealing with dry drunk behavior. It had stopped for a long time. I've forgotten all the little tools to detach and how to survive without being blown away with every nastiness. many thanks.
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Vermont635a
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2
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411
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banned
(Preview)
ok someone help me out here I was just banned from the chat room....
Why was that???
please help me ..
Thanks
camra
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camra
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2
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404
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the chat rm is strange sometimes
(Preview)
Some ppl I see in the room, I never see on the Boards & vice versa.
I come to the Boards to vent naturally but usually I am looking for the ESH from others.
I go to the ch rm to vent wildly - but it's so funny to me how one sentence or two & ppl start to talk back, make their comments when they have neve...
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kitty
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8
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497
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In rememberance of our Vets...
(Preview)
The writer composed the attached video/song after a true experience that took place. Please take a moment to see it and reflect.
A huge "Thank You" to all our veterans.
Christy
A Pittance of Time
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Christy
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7
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775
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Thought for the Day/Motives
(Preview)
My sponsor has ingrained in my head how crucial it is to look at my motives before taking any action or making any decision.
My motives are are the seeds from which all my actions sprout. I can either plant flowers that beautify my surroundings and bring&nbs...
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Emmie11
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1
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424
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just another night
(Preview)
Here it is a friday night ny A is in bed with his drink next to him. I'm sitting alone doing nothing but thinking. That all I do these day is think about how all this happened. They say you don't cause a person to drink but he was not like this when we married 26 years ago what happened the girls are away for the w...
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jpembert
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1
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326
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I got up the nerve!!!
(Preview)
Well I finally got up the nerve to ask someone else to be my f2f sponsor. She said Yes!!! I don't know where this will take me or if she is the right one... but she is a start!
Today was a good day. I took care of myself... stayed in bed till 11:30, took a bubble bath with music and candles (wow, never did tha...
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sandie123
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7
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619
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resentments are slave drivers
(Preview)
Funny thing, i ordered a new/used "dillema of the alcoholic marriage" book, and inside it was a clipping from an article about resentments. I can see what the person before me held on to it as it is a great reading so i thought i'd share it with you all too.
Resent Somebody
"The moment you begin...
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mastiff
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7
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420
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I can't do this anymore...I am gonna loose it pretty darn soon
(Preview)
Ok ...like right now my soab gramma said I have to get off the pc...OMG I go on to express my feeling instead of lashing my anger out on myself..because I am self injuring at times...So this is definetely an outlet I use to cope with my living conditions,and depression(which is anger turned inw...
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Lauren ashley
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9
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612
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light bulb moment
(Preview)
So, I went to the first night of my "retreat" or so I thought, it is actually a self motivation course, not what I thought at all. Well I did know that we were going to do some self exploration but not to the depth of it. Im staying at the hotel where it is taking place and I was glad to be finished a...
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sunny1
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2
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360
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Too many questions!!!
(Preview)
I now have my A son living with me. I have an in-law apt. next to my home for guest and he is staying there. He is in an intensive outpatient program now which he goes to for 3 hours a day...4 days a week. He really likes it. My problem of course, is me. I want to constantly talk to him about reconciling with his f...
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Gailey
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6
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467
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Just for Today Gratitude
(Preview)
Heya my wonderful friends,
Just for today, I wanted to express my gratitude for all the wonders of my life.
Just for today, I have you my wonderful friends, to help guide me through my recovery.
Just for today, I have life, breathe, and happiness.
Just for today, I can smell the popcorn my son is...
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bob6502
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1
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363
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Hard night
(Preview)
My husband has been after me to take a loan out of the bank so he can buy a truck. Mind you he has the money but he doesn't want to give the person the cash. Well I told him to use the money that he has that I wouldn't be helping him. He has been pressuring me alot waiting for me to break. I am getting close to that ti...
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nycbt
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10
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409
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another small triumph
(Preview)
My A came last night to pick up some linens to move into the sober house. I put together a few things that were his when he moved in (that's about all he brought along with his clothes) and he spoke, I listened. I had very little to say. He asked how I felt about him staying at the sober house. I sa...
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Kim
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4
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390
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things i love about my husband
(Preview)
Hi I live with an active alchoic. When he is not drinking he is the best friend. He listen he is funny, he cuddles with me at night. He loves to give hugs. Those are things I love about him. He does the cooking and he does the bills. Those are too things I do not do. He helps clean he never wants me to do all of it. H...
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nycbt
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5
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658
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GOOD NIGHT
(Preview)
Yesterday was a good night we spent the time talking and watching tv. Those are the days are love and then I remeber why I got married. But then there are days like Sunday and Tuesday that make me wonder why I am in this mess. However I am getting stronger and I am getting more help from people that has helped...
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nycbt
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3
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359
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More insanity at home
(Preview)
My kids had off school today and tomorrow. My ex took my daughter to work today and I was going to bring my son (14) with me. We told him he could earn some money helping, a basement renovation. I thought he would like to opportunity to earn some money, he's been asking for a job lately. This morning he said h...
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UncleLou
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5
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423
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anyone else with the "at home" drinker?
(Preview)
My A doesnt fool around on me
My A doesnt gamble
My A doesnt drive drunk
My A doesnt do cocaine
My A doesnt hit me/us
My A sits in the finished basement and drinks. I watch him get drunk. When I hear other peoples stories I think my A isnt that bad so why do I need to go to F2F to hear their stories? Can a...
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Barbara
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6
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847
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Not sure if I am okay
(Preview)
The last two days have been a true test to my program.
I am sure many of you have heard me brag that I have found a great place of serenity, even though my husband is still drinking/using.
That peaceful place has been challenged very hard the last two days.
I try very hard to remember that I am n...
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captcodee
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3
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530
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My Journal....
(Preview)
Hi all,
Well Im off on a weekend retreat, leaving tonight at 6pm my time. I was given a list of items to bring with me and was told to think about one topic that I would like to focus on. That's a hard one for me....I have so many things that I would like to change, improve or think about....
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sunny1
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5
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333
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a prayer for all of us
(Preview)
Almighty Master, Physician of our Souls bodies, You alone are prompt to defend us; quickly visit Your suffering servant Mother Earth. In Your mercy, deliver us all from sickness, bitterness, pain, suffering, relapse & poor choices. Heal us now, so that we may sing p...
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kitty
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1
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462
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Waxing! (Funny)
(Preview)
Ok all,
I got this at work and it made me laugh. Some of us share the same sense of humor, so I am hoping that I do not offend anyone.
All hair removal methods have tricked women with their promises of easy, painless removal - The epilady, scissors, razors, Nair and now...the...
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Dolphin123
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12
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2934
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I tried......
(Preview)
I am soo kinda happy because I have been going to my moms house for the past three days..I haven't seen her since summer time.
I refused to see her because she chose to drink,and I just did not want to be a part of it..
The first two days i was kinda like w/e im gonna c my mom..today we actually had...
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Lauren ashley
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4
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677
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The rest of the day was about me
(Preview)
I started the day worrying about my A. I ended my day doing things for me. I had taken the day off...started like Isaid calling my A and worrying about where he slept last night...byt the time he called me back this afternoon I had thought over things and realized I have nothing good to say to him rig...
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Kim
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4
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568
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Moving out & Moving On
(Preview)
Hey folks,
Just an update - haven't been on for awhile - if I have, it's been short to catch a meeting. I'm going crazy getting ready to move - going through stuff -OM gosh - where does it all come from? I've managed to mostly clean daughter's room - get stuffed animals & keepsakes into...
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cedarpines
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3
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874
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email to my A
(Preview)
Well,
I don't know if I'm really following the program or not, to me this is my way of detaching, but I wrote my A an email tonite. Last night, I called him to ask him a question and we talked for a few minutes and then he said hey I'm gonna go , I'm not much on talking on the phone, so see ya later. I said okeeee....
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jonibaloni21
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2
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347
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my a just called at 530am
(Preview)
my husband just called said he left his moms already for today. he doent start work until 830am i heard a radio so i knew he was not home. he said he wants to come home he won't do it again he misses me. the two of us are so torn i am so drained i went to bed so early. i could have slept until 7 but the phone wok...
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chrissy
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6
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664
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The beauty of every day
(Preview)
I remembered today that I used to think I was lucky to be living my life. The last time I thought that was far too long ago. I want to feel that way again, I think I am ready.
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sallyb
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2
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463
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Do you like the wind??
(Preview)
It is so windy here today. I come from a very windy place, but recently moved away. I have been feeling very lonesome, but not able to go home.
As I sit here I suddenly hear the rush of the wind through a small crack in my office window. (How blessed I am that I have a win...
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captcodee
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2
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679
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Question about custody arrangements for those separated from A with kids
(Preview)
Hi everyone,
I really think that I will not be able to continue to live like this (with an active A) for the long term. I have a good job, have family close by for support, and I could do it on my own if I finally make that decision. I think the biggest thing concerning me right now is wha...
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Magpie
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5
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624
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i feel like ive been beaten up friday sucks
(Preview)
every friday i go through the same crappy nightmare. will he screw up again? i know with all the scary stuff i went through with amanda ,that i should relax. i went to sleep and woke up with such a migraine & i havent heard from my a since 1130:pm he said he would call me when he got to his mom...
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chrissy
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8
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698
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Does It Get Any Better???
(Preview)
You know when I first met my husband over three years ago I can remember a time I couldn't wait to get home to him. I wanted to spend every waking hour with him. It's not like that anymore and I feel such guilt.
I love my husband but so much has happened and I'm still harboring some resentment...
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JulieLynn
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7
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406
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Commandments for calm living
(Preview)
Hi Everyone,
When alcoholism affects our lives, it is very difficult to stay calm, so I thought I would share this. I know for myself I need to fear less and not worry about the future.
Commandments for calm living:
Thou shalt not worry, for worry is the most unproductive of all huma...
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Diane43
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6
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867
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I'm Not Alright
(Preview)
I am so very mixed up or something. since my friend Donna died, I can't get with the program, I can't sit still, I can't stay in a meeting for the full time, I'm bored, I'm fidgeting, I'm restless. I think why her? why not me? I am just about to EXPLODE!!!! I can't get the feelings out, no one will listen and ca...
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jonibaloni21
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10
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866
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God said, No.
(Preview)
Just received this in an email from another friend in recovery...you may enjoy it too.
I asked God to take away my habit. God said, No. It is not for me to take away, but for you to give it up. I asked God to make my handicapped child whole. God said, No. His Spirit is whole, his body is only tempora...
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Satori
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4
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608
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can you actually be working the steps w/out formally realizing youre doing so?
(Preview)
Seems alot of my thinking has been step related even though Im not "officially" working the steps. Is it actually a mix? different times doing different steps?
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Barbara
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7
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814
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so he didn't go to rehab...
(Preview)
So, this morning I try to call him about driving him to rehab...I was home waiting...although I am sick as well with a viral thing and was out from work yesterday so i was home but had to go in for a meeting today after 12...He didn't answer the phone and of course I thought the worst. 10 minutes later I get a c...
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Kim
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4
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740
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a way to let go of the past
(Preview)
last night i looked over my diary from over the past two years. the only stuff i ever wrote in it was all the lousy stuff my a did to me and how lousy i felt and how my life was so wrong. the thoughts of when i was suicidal. basically the whole thing was written about my a and how i let everything he ever did make me...
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notsonew1111
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4
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405
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Growing PAINS
(Preview)
I have some growing pains going on inside me. My sponsor who I love to death is helping me but it is hard to do. I am going to do what she asks me because I want to get better. Like writing done all my obessives thought. I am planning on getting a notebook because I have alot of obessive thoughts. Writing down e...
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nycbt
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2
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450
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dont wait
(Preview)
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notsonew1111
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1
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310
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Gossip and Backstabbing- Yes, this means U
(Preview)
The drama of other people's problems can be very distracting, but in Al-Anon we discover that the problem does not lie solely within another person, the problem lies within us.
The behavior of a friend, spouse, child, sibling, parent may have led us to alanon but we soon realize that o...
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^Lucy
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12
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932
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I need some input
(Preview)
In previous post I talked about leaving my husband and being gone for 6weeks. I have since returned. While cleaning the house I came across a receipt for oxycodone written to a lady I believe works with my husband in our bedroom. There was also a message on our answering machine that my hus...
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JulieLynn
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10
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446
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the dog....
(Preview)
good morning all,
okay so heres the deal, I can not let this one go....
yesterday I posted about the dog, Im going to a retret this weekend and my bf was having issues about where the dog is going. thx to all your comments I have decided to give him to my brother and wife, who are real dog lovers, th...
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sunny1
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6
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364
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belonging and connecting....what do YOU guys think???
(Preview)
Belonging And Connecting
We have powerful desires to belong and to connect with a special someone. We inherited a model for marriage and relationships that has remained largely unchanged for over 50 years. That traditional model was never intended to integrate our individual needs with th...
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rosie light shines
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3
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464
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damn it!! i DO belong
(Preview)
A SENSE OF BELONGING Perhaps one of the greatest rewards of meditation and prayer is the sense of belonging that comes to us. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 105
That's what it is -- belonging! After a session of meditation I knew that the feeling I was experiencing was a sense of belonging b...
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rosie light shines
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1
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580
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anyone on here from Massachusetts?
(Preview)
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Barbara
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3
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468
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Anger has got a hold on me
(Preview)
I'm having a hard time since he didn't go to rehab. I'm sick to my stomach. I didn't think it would be affecting me this way. I'm angry at him, the insurance companies and a variety of others....but mostly I am angry at myself. I am obsessing again....worried about about every little thing he does. I feel...
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Kim
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5
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653
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Take what you like, and leave the rest
(Preview)
This is an important part of the suggested closing in alanon.
"Take what you like, and leave the rest"
Many people in recovery, weather it be Alanon, or AA, or any program, are coming from a terrible place, a place where we all were once ourselves. It is hard to break some of the nasty di...
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captcodee
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4
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1718
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Tired and have the blahs
(Preview)
Things are going o.k. I'm just not in a good mood this week. My a hasn't gone to meetings this week because he is very busy with work. I understand this, but I am still frustrateda and scared, because when he doesn't go that gets his stinkin' thinkin' going again. He gets grouc...
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hudsond
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4
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349
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BOY, i am really showing you all my heart!!! would love ESH
(Preview)
Beliefs about Money
I was starting a new job for a corporation. I was good at what I did for a living. The personnel manager and I were down to the details of employment, and he asked me how much money I believed I deserved. I thought about it and came up with a figure of $400 a month. This was back in the...
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rosie light shines
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1
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561
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Friday,11/11 OP Needed for AM Meeting
(Preview)
Hello - I will be unable to do this Friday's AM meeting. I am posting this as a friendly reminder and a "Thank You" to whoever takes over Have a Great Day, Wishes, Tea2
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tea2
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0
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291
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this sux
(Preview)
I have to go to therapy right now............grrrr i fuckin hate therapy..its boring and my therapist is a bitch..she bitched that I go to alanon..and not alateen..I said well at least I am going somewhere to help me....I told her I wanted a new therapist,and shes like why..I said just becau...
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Lauren ashley
|
11
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636
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question to all who have stayed
(Preview)
i just read a bunch of replies to someones post about what life was like living with an active a. many people said that they live separate lives from their a and are happy. so my question is are all of you just existing in a relationship? or are your need actually being fullfilled? is there still intimacy?...
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notsonew1111
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12
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810
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If I had one wish
(Preview)
Hi all,
Everytime someone is asked about what one thing they would like to change in the world, most people answer "World Peace". That is all well and good, but I would say "a cure for alcoholism/addiction". A belief I have is that curing that would have a domino affect and many issues we have would go a...
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Dolphin123
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4
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621
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i know we probaly know this already but may be it could help
(Preview)
Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (Alcohol Dependence)
by Debra Wood, RNDefinition
Alcohol abuse is a disease that involves desire for alcohol and continuing to drink even when faced with alcohol-related job, legal, social, health, or family problems. Alcohol abuse can progress to alcoholism...
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chrissy
|
2
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604
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