The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Funny thing, i ordered a new/used "dillema of the alcoholic marriage" book, and inside it was a clipping from an article about resentments. I can see what the person before me held on to it as it is a great reading so i thought i'd share it with you all too.
Resent Somebody
"The moment you begin resenting a person, you become his slave. He controls your dreams, absorbs your digestion, robs you of your peace of mind and good will, and takes away the pleasure of your work. He ruins your religion and nullifies your prayers. You cannot take a vacation without his going along!
He destroys your freedom of mind and hounds you wherever you go. There is no way to escape the person you resent. He is with you when you are awake; he invades your privacy when you sleep.
He is close beside you when you eat, when you drive your car, and when you are on the job.
You can never have efficiency nor happiness. He influences even the tone of your voice. He requires you to take medicines for indigestion, headaches, and loss of energy. He even steals your last moment of consciousness before you go to sleep.
So if you want to be a slave, harbor your resentments!"
--- From an AA Newsletter, San Francisco
I have found that even though i am doing all that damage above, i am also benifiting somehow from a resentment if i am harboring one. It might be that i am gaining pity from others for how i've been wronged. More likely for me though, i get to feel better about my faults if i can focus on someone elses. This old pot doesn't look so black when i'm looking at a kettle in a sick & twisted way lol. If i am givin a choice to do all that damage or to just let go and let god, i think today i'll choose to let god.
god loves ya i love ya and there aint a darn thing you can do about it
What a beautiful, profound article!!! And to think God put it right there in that lil ole book you ordered for you. He is always working for us and there for us just right when we need it. A miracle.
love ya,
Maria
__________________
If I am not for me, who will be? If I am only for myself, then who am I? If not now, when?
If you have read some of my other posts in the last day or so,you will read that Iam doing a self motivation course this weekend, lastnights topics, guilt, resentments, gains, loss, is very prevelant *sp that this morning the 2 top posts for me to read is yours, and gardengals....both very good resentment reminders for me on how my HP is telling me, Yvette, LET IT GO!!!!
Thank you for sharing this, I am going to copy the artical and past it into my journal, just as a reminder of why I dont want resentment to by my closest friend. Funny how god gave you the artical too. with support in your recovery, have a great day.
Wow,,very powerful message,,I am glad you shared, as I needed to hear that "today". I have been struggling with resentment, long story shortened,,I have been feeling quite inadequate lately, with the visit from my daughter and granddaughter, thinking they would rather be visiting with their father than myself. How silly does that sound? I know,,but these are very common with us alanoners . My resentment towards my A (husband ) for breaking our family up etc,,and the old haunts of the why's and how could you etc. ,,,back to step one,,I am powerless . So thanks again.
HP is just so amazing! What a great gift you received, and by your sharing, that we all received. That is just such a good article! I sure dont want that danged ole resentment riding with me for the next few days on my solo drive out to California. Thanks for the heads up....I will certainly keep an eye out for that fiendish hitchhiker and steer a wide path around him!
Something interesting I learned about resentment was that the root word is the Latin sentire, "to feel." Adding the prefix re- (meaning "again") to this root word, what it means when we resent, is literally "to feel again."
So, all these resentments I so stubbornly cling to and refuse to let go of really just amount to me repeatedly feeling the same old pain, over and over. Why in the world would I want to do that? And why do I think it is punishing anyone but me?
My mind is such a dangerous place. I should definitely not venture into it without a buddy.
Aron
