Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Painful · Painful

Am new to this. I've been with my boyfriend for 14 years and we have kids together. When he drinks he becomes a bully to all of us. We try to walk away but he follows us and keeps bring up are flaws. I know we should not argue with him but we get so mad, frustrated and want to hurt him like he is hurting us. It's alw...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP! Today's reading talks about the disease of alcoholism, and that it is classified as a family disease. It affects not only the drinker but those o us who care about him or her as well. The writer suggests that or some of us, our thinking that's been passed down from generations befor...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all... I am back from the northern city. Going there was my goal-set for the year- present for myself. This time i did not isolate- but stayed with friends- in a warm comfortable space. One of my long term goals is to be part of a process- that places ACA D-F in a comfortable spot- between Alanon, AA...

kalotaxidi · kalotaxidi

This past year has been a whirlwind with my pregnancy causing my husband to go off the deep end, a new baby, 3 rehabs, and now a new discovery of infidelity. He was away from the house for 5 months over the summer/early fall, and I let him back in after I saw that he was back to his old self and 3 months sober. Th...

Freetime · Freetime

Today's page in One Day At A Time In Al-Anon distinguishes between self-love and love of self. In the author's terms, self-love means a big ego and lack of empathy, while love of self reflects the Biblical phrase "Love thy neighbor as thyself." Only when we value ourselves can we truly love others. R...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Yesterday was very action-packed! I am only going to say all of this to put it in print! I had the most craziest day yesterday! First I went to a big box store twice in 2 different cities. But to step back, I was in the first store in line behind my husband. There was an I-phone right on the end of the line sitti...

hotrod · hotrod

https://stepwork.activeboard.com/t66021917/step-11-11-1/

Skorpi · Skorpi

In today's reading from Courage to Change, the author reflects on Step 5: Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. The author wondered about the "exact nature" of their wrongs - was it the negative actions they took, or something else? For the author, t...

mamalioness · mamalioness

Just had to share this language of letting go November 5 This is so cool I had to share it The relationship just was not working out, and I wanted it so badly. I kept thinking if I just made myself look better, if I just try to be more loving, kind, then he or she would love me. I turned myself inside out to be so...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C Reading for 11/5 speaks about the importance of examining our motives. it suggests that many times we speak in order to change another or to manipulate them into what we want. The reading suggests that having the courage to look closely at ourselves in order to uncover what we sa...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone: There are two concepts that strike me from todays reading. First, that we can only be concerned with ourselves and that other peoples behavior (or any of us trying to control it) will not affect our serenity. The sentence that sticks out to me along these lines is: Serenity is a...

JerryF · JerryF

And my wife and I are having fun supporting the growth. Great Grand-Son this time...cutie baby and looks like his Mommy. We are picking out infant cloths and stuff to send so that they know we are involving with it and sharing love. This part of the family doesn't drink or use...Yeeeehaw!! Thank y...

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for Monday, 11/4, talks about the importance of acceptance, especially when dealing with unpleasant realities. The writer learned to have alternative plans ready when they could not count on the alcoholic to come through. By allowing acceptance, the author could give themself cho...

mamalioness · mamalioness

One day at a time in Al-Anon, October 24 Author talks about going to a meeting and hearing many members complaining and moaning about not having what they felt entitled to, or about the alcoholics behavior and generally about their sorry lot in life One brave person spoke up: he or she said that you know...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all... ...went to my closest f@f Alanon meeting last night. There was one other person there; a different person from last time. It was a great meeting; much better than a one-person meeting, which anyone can do at home. Being November the topic was Step 11. I had already shared on Step 1...

Seahorse7 · Seahorse7

Hello. Years since Ive been here. Sadly my AH has not chosen to help himself all this time and I cannot even raise the topic or it ends up in a horrible fight. Hes getting worse. I just keep my mouth shut and try not to engage but its eating me up. I have chronic anxiety. Im desperately lonely and I know I need s...

Lyne · Lyne

Finding this solution opens many avenues for me, another alanon blessing. Lyne

Temple · Temple

It didn't work, but for those stalwarts still with me, last post on other subject line is "I've got a plan and a great surgeon, and a middle path."

DavidG · DavidG

This younger man appeared on my doorstep. At a vital time of my life. His mum and dad had taken me in and supported me. But i know Fr. was a problem drinker. He was a priest in the Anglican Church. A double binder for a lot of people. He had eventually killed himself... I spent a day with K. He had been only ch...

mamalioness · mamalioness

a nice officer who didn't even know about the call till about 2hrs. ago, came....she tried to, in spite of her paralysis, tried to protect me....we walked her out to the truck and I fell apart.....I totally lost it...............I MISS HER.....I WANNA die!!!1 this hurts so bad....she was my best fri...

Freetime · Freetime

Today's author talks about how to tame racing thoughts, and compares it to a horse racing out of control and not obeying the rider's commands. For the horse, repeating the same command louder and louder does not work. The author learned to stop the horse, get his attention, and start again. How c...

Skorpi · Skorpi

With apologies for the lateness of today's post: In today's reading from Courage to Change, the author reflects on the way they have made choices throughout their life. Upon reflection, the author realized that most of their choices had been made as a reaction to fear. (An appropriate topic for th...

Wolfie55 · Wolfie55

I remember growing up. My parents were both problem drinkers. There was always a lot of arguing and sometimes fighting which almost always resulted in my mother getting the crap kicked out of her. This always meant a trip to the hotel for us, or sometimes we would go visit my aunt. She lived on a farm. I le...

Chicagopilot · Chicagopilot

After a few weeks of separation from my wife I have decided it is time to get myself to some meetings. My question is would I benefit from Al-anon meetings even though she is a cocaine and opioid abuser? Finding a nar-anon meeting is proving to be much more difficult than an Alanon meeting. It seems to me...

Lyne · Lyne

For Monday, 10/28, the author discusses their attitudes towards others, both negative and positive. They note when they accept someone unconditionally, they feel safer. On the other hand, when defensive and impatient, the author expects others to be unkind to them. The writer says its in thei...

Wolfie55 · Wolfie55

Haven't been around much recently. I was sick a while ago, bad cold, it got really bad one day so i went to the hospital with the hopes of getting some heavy duty antibiotics. They didn't let me leave for 6 days. Turns out I had pneumonia in both lungs and was suffering a side effect of one of my diabetes med...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for today October 29 speaks about being sensitive and blaming others for our feelings. The reading provides an example of someone who has taken a woman's inventory about her weight which enraged the person , who pointed out their concerns. the person who had taken issue wi...

expat78 · expat78

I'm new to Al-Anon. My husband is an alcoholic and is currently in a 28 day rehab program and has just finished his first week. He left after one day previously, but checked himself back in. I'm an American living in his home country of Ireland (we met in the states and moved back three years ago). We have t...

Skorpi · Skorpi

In today's reading, the author shares that, when they first came to Al-Anon, they heard some people say that they were grateful to be involved with an alcoholic. Naturally, the author thought these people were crazy. Weren't the alcoholics the cause of everyone's problems in Al-Anon? And yet, the a...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

Working a program is hard work, it isnt easy becoming aware of yourself. It was not easy for me to stop blaming everything about myself on my parents, and my ex alcoholic husband after getting away from all my abusers, I took time alone with my kids in tow and went to al-anon meetings, found a sponsor and w...

Buckeye Girl · Buckeye Girl

My adult daughter who has been to rehab 7 times and sober living twice, got engaged to a heavy drinker about 6 months ago, after dating for almost 4 years. He has been witness to 3 of her relapses, two of which have required 30 day rehabs. Since the engagement, she has relapsed again, and appears they both...

DavidG · DavidG

I used to hear: "I am my own worst enemy!" That is about self-sabotage. And I have seen it in other often- where it is much easier to detect. But in myself- pernicious! I have seen myself in East Texas- admittedly in a stressful situation- trying to put diesel in a petrol rental car. Admittedly the co...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all, I hear people talking about stormy seas- and I use these images too. My life fell apart when i was in school. My history teacher had an MA. He told me I was capable of being a University Lecturer. So i high have been smarter than him. Or, more likely had more opportunity than he ha...

Chicagopilot · Chicagopilot

I see a lot of use of acronyms here and being new to the board I am not sure what they all mean. Is there any place that has them all listed?

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP. We have colder weather this morning, the start of the last season of 4...as I sit here and reflect on my day and my life, it dawned on me that Today is a great day for an attitude of gratitude. I am grateful for a program of recovery that gives me a variety of tools to use to live life on life'...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all... ...there are two aspects to this share... ...along the way sharing has become second nature to me. It has bought me out of my shell. It has given me discipline, over time. But I still love doing it, and I always shall. I know- in the beginning- I didn't cause it, can't control it, an...

Fedora · Fedora

Hi there. Tonight I did something totally out of character for me. But it felt fairly liberating. AH and I were having yet another round of the same fight we've had for decades. When he got tired of what I had to say he went to get a drink out of the fridge. And then I got tired of that. So I went right behind him...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about how our self esteem can be affected after having lived with alcoholism. Dealing with the disease is a sure way to stamp down any sense of confidence and self worth. The writer describes how over time, attending meetings, finding a sponsor, were all way...

DavidG · DavidG

"With the help of Alanon friends. sponsor, literature, and our Higher Power, we learn to distinguish the real from the imagined, the harm from the legitimate boundary, the deed from the fallible doer- and perhaps we can eventually polish the tarnish past into a treasured antique. Many of us feel...

Temple · Temple

That went really well. One of the sites in question was smaller than I heard the first time, by a factor of 10 The procedure((s) were hardly painful at all. And the nurse said even if--they aren't likely to recommend chemo or radiation in my case. So that is great--Even if, I won't have to arm-wrestle...

mamalioness · mamalioness

What a hard life

mamalioness · mamalioness

My old doggie's back legs gave out on her AGAIN and this time there is no fixing it I can't get her into my truck and I can't afford (with no job, still) a huge vet bill to euthanize, so I called the animal shelter and they will help me....Sad, I can't hold her while she passes, but I am medicating her with my an...

Freetime · Freetime

Today's author found that being too passive was a defect of character: letting things happen to them, rather than taking action. It was the best they knew how to do at the time, but harm was done. Now, the way they make amends is to stop practicing the defect. They take action in all areas of life, and tak...

Temple · Temple

Thanks to everyone for the love and prayers. Please keep them coming. I am still expecting a miraculous outcome. I am to have two biopsies in another two weeks. And I'll have tiny titanium markers inserted. That cracked me up. Here's hoping, and praying, that DDH can suck it up and not throw any t...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all... I no longer live the life of a victim- at least I don't think so. My first ten years of Alanon were unstructured sharing. It felt like everyone sponsored everyone else, within the group. And I was around when sponsorship came into vogue- and i got a sponsor. What happened that ther...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP. Happy Thursday to one and all. Today's reading compares the process of recovery to the peeling of an onion or the growth of a birch tree. In both scenarios, there is a process of growth, shedding, healing, etc. We peel away a layer at a time with an onion, often shedding a few tears a...

mamalioness · mamalioness

Todays entry talks about examining a common place familiar phrase. A lot of times we are told to meditate on it, or take it apart and explore it. We are advised to stand in our own light, how clearly the picture emerges of our shadowing our own happiness by mistaken thinking. Maybe we should just stand ou...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading from C2C, the author shares that, while sobriety brings change, it doesn't take away all the problems. The author was sure that the nightmare was over once the alcholic became sober. Instead, the alcoholic accused, insulted, and attacked, becoming verbally abusive...

a4l · a4l

Progressive, alcoholism is progressive. Things are bad here. The alcoholic mother is at the height of her lifelong irresponsibly selfish and foul natured best. I'm torn between wanting to cut and run or have her committed. I can't believe my life sees me faced with the burden of someone who is me...

mamalioness · mamalioness

Hi Everyone!!! Wish I had good news on my part, but last week I lost 1/2 of my income , losing my largest client. I am clinging to my program and my HP and a few trusted recovery mates and close family/friends , doing affirmations, yoga, casting burden to my HP within me, I'm doing it ALL to fight off the fear...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! I'm at a conference today, so taking today's reading from Today's Hope. The author shares that sometimes they can feel really alone or afraid. They have discovered that in these times, they are often focusing on their own problems and perspectives. They have the ability to help others o...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading is about Tradition 9 - "Our groups, as such, ought never be organized; but we may create service boards or committees directly responsible to those they serve." (This is also the quote for the day!) Today's reminder is "If I take on service responsibilities in my group, it does not me...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading fort today stresses the importance of examining our motive in order to uncover our negative destructive attitudes It points out that we have many positive qualities so that we must also embrace them and remember the Walt wthimqn quote;' i am larger better than I thought i did not k...

Chocolatelover · Chocolatelover

Hello, Im new here but have been dealing with an alcoholic husband to long. As is often the case I find myself having to support our family with one income instead of the two we used to have. I cant afford our house and need to sell desperately. However my husband pretty much spends all his time laying on th...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am willing & able to maintain my recovery. I am currently trying to stop taking other's inventories & focus on mine. & what people think of me is none of my business. It is nice to be important but it is more important to be nice. Just a few thoughts.

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for Monday, 10/21, talks about how to find faith, how to figure out what HP wants for us, and how to stop feeling powerless, helpless, hopeless, and frightened. The author feels they struggle with these issues even though they try to find HPs guidance. Some of the answers are to ask for cl...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all, ...when i joined the MIP online groups- I picked up a saying- that made the steps and serenity prayer much more simple- to hold in my hand, as it were. Poco a poco, paso a paso, dia por dia... little by little, step by step, day by day. And so I achieved the 'one day at a time' goal- being ab...

Dancer66 · Dancer66

Ok--this might be insanely stupid--but I am hypersensitive to certain smells cigarettes, bbq, pot, air vent/manufactuing smells, tar...). Particularly the smell of beer. (I was this way when I was pregnant so I am not sure if its menopause hormones now). When my AH has a beer open I can smell it as...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- For me, there is quite a bit that resonates from todays page. The writer describes his/her first Alanon mtg, where a woman describes loneliness as being dark and lonely, like the bottom of a well. This struck the writer, along with the idea that the tools and practices of the...

Freetime · Freetime

Today's reading in Courage to Change points out that our recovery gives us opportunities to continually deepen our learning. For example, we may have learned detachment in one situation, and then as life moves on, we encounter a new situation where we need to apply detachment. Even though apply...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Don't know what to do (Preview) Am new to this. I've been with my boyfriend for 14 years and we have kids together. When he drinks he becomes a bully to all of us. We try to walk away but he follows us and keeps bring up are flaws. I know we should not argue with him but we get so mad, frustrated and want to hurt him like he is hurting us. It's alw...	Painful	10	6075	Nov 10, 2019 by tiredtonite
	Courage to Change 11/7 (Preview) Good morning MIP! Today's reading talks about the disease of alcoholism, and that it is classified as a family disease. It affects not only the drinker but those o us who care about him or her as well. The writer suggests that or some of us, our thinking that's been passed down from generations befor...	Iamhere	5	546	Nov 9, 2019 by Maresie888
	Time out is time well spent... (Preview) Hi y'all... I am back from the northern city. Going there was my goal-set for the year- present for myself. This time i did not isolate- but stayed with friends- in a warm comfortable space. One of my long term goals is to be part of a process- that places ACA D-F in a comfortable spot- between Alanon, AA...	DavidG	0	3542	Nov 9, 2019 by DavidG
	Cheating and where to go from here (Preview) This past year has been a whirlwind with my pregnancy causing my husband to go off the deep end, a new baby, 3 rehabs, and now a new discovery of infidelity. He was away from the house for 5 months over the summer/early fall, and I let him back in after I saw that he was back to his old self and 3 months sober. Th...	kalotaxidi	12	4514	Nov 9, 2019 by Bo
	ODAT 11/8 (Preview) Today's page in One Day At A Time In Al-Anon distinguishes between self-love and love of self. In the author's terms, self-love means a big ego and lack of empathy, while love of self reflects the Biblical phrase "Love thy neighbor as thyself." Only when we value ourselves can we truly love others. R...	Freetime	4	3786	Nov 8, 2019 by Iamhere
	2 good deeds & one event w/ anxiety! (Preview) Yesterday was very action-packed! I am only going to say all of this to put it in print! I had the most craziest day yesterday! First I went to a big box store twice in 2 different cities. But to step back, I was in the first store in line behind my husband. There was an I-phone right on the end of the line sitti...	Hoot Nanny	5	3237	Nov 8, 2019 by Bo
	Step 11 posted (Preview) https://stepwork.activeboard.com/t66021917/step-11-11-1/	hotrod	5	5737	Nov 7, 2019 by JerryF
	Courage to Change November 6 (Preview) In today's reading from Courage to Change, the author reflects on Step 5: Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. The author wondered about the "exact nature" of their wrongs - was it the negative actions they took, or something else? For the author, t...	Skorpi	4	2686	Nov 6, 2019 by Iamhere
	Just had to share this language of letting go November 5 (Preview) Just had to share this language of letting go November 5 This is so cool I had to share it The relationship just was not working out, and I wanted it so badly. I kept thinking if I just made myself look better, if I just try to be more loving, kind, then he or she would love me. I turned myself inside out to be so...	mamalioness	3	3404	Nov 6, 2019 by mamalioness
	C2 C Reading 11-5 (Preview) The C2C Reading for 11/5 speaks about the importance of examining our motives. it suggests that many times we speak in order to change another or to manipulate them into what we want. The reading suggests that having the courage to look closely at ourselves in order to uncover what we sa...	hotrod	7	541	Nov 5, 2019 by Wolfie55
	Nov 3 Hope for Today (Preview) Good morning Everyone: There are two concepts that strike me from todays reading. First, that we can only be concerned with ourselves and that other peoples behavior (or any of us trying to control it) will not affect our serenity. The sentence that sticks out to me along these lines is: Serenity is a...	yanksfan51	6	1693	Nov 5, 2019 by Maresie888
	The family continues to grow (Preview) And my wife and I are having fun supporting the growth. Great Grand-Son this time...cutie baby and looks like his Mommy. We are picking out infant cloths and stuff to send so that they know we are involving with it and sharing love. This part of the family doesn't drink or use...Yeeeehaw!! Thank y...	JerryF	9	2365	Nov 5, 2019 by Iamhere
	C2C, 11/4 (Preview) The reading for Monday, 11/4, talks about the importance of acceptance, especially when dealing with unpleasant realities. The writer learned to have alternative plans ready when they could not count on the alcoholic to come through. By allowing acceptance, the author could give themself cho...	Lyne	6	4394	Nov 5, 2019 by Maresie888
	One day at a time in Al-Anon, October 24 (Preview) One day at a time in Al-Anon, October 24 Author talks about going to a meeting and hearing many members complaining and moaning about not having what they felt entitled to, or about the alcoholics behavior and generally about their sorry lot in life One brave person spoke up: he or she said that you know...	mamalioness	12	3468	Nov 5, 2019 by mamalioness
	A catch-up share, and when is enough sharing enough...? (Preview) Hi y'all... ...went to my closest f@f Alanon meeting last night. There was one other person there; a different person from last time. It was a great meeting; much better than a one-person meeting, which anyone can do at home. Being November the topic was Step 11. I had already shared on Step 1...	DavidG	1	2962	Nov 4, 2019 by Freetime
	Al-Anon for atheists and introverts (Preview) Hello. Years since Ive been here. Sadly my AH has not chosen to help himself all this time and I cannot even raise the topic or it ends up in a horrible fight. Hes getting worse. I just keep my mouth shut and try not to engage but its eating me up. I have chronic anxiety. Im desperately lonely and I know I need s...	Seahorse7	10	5434	Nov 3, 2019 by Seahorse7
	11/4 continued (Preview) Finding this solution opens many avenues for me, another alanon blessing. Lyne	Lyne	0	2164	Nov 3, 2019 by Lyne
	tried to change subject to "Never mind-got back to bus board. (Preview) It didn't work, but for those stalwarts still with me, last post on other subject line is "I've got a plan and a great surgeon, and a middle path."	Temple	5	6323	Nov 3, 2019 by Temple
	I drained my battery- but glad of it... Steps 10, 11 and 12... (Preview) This younger man appeared on my doorstep. At a vital time of my life. His mum and dad had taken me in and supported me. But i know Fr. was a problem drinker. He was a priest in the Anglican Church. A double binder for a lot of people. He had eventually killed himself... I spent a day with K. He had been only ch...	DavidG	1	4146	Nov 3, 2019 by Lyne
	SHE's gone (Preview) a nice officer who didn't even know about the call till about 2hrs. ago, came....she tried to, in spite of her paralysis, tried to protect me....we walked her out to the truck and I fell apart.....I totally lost it...............I MISS HER.....I WANNA die!!!1 this hurts so bad....she was my best fri...	mamalioness	31	4000	Nov 2, 2019 by mamalioness
	C2C, November 1 (Preview) Today's author talks about how to tame racing thoughts, and compares it to a horse racing out of control and not obeying the rider's commands. For the horse, repeating the same command louder and louder does not work. The author learned to stop the horse, get his attention, and start again. How c...	Freetime	6	697	Nov 2, 2019 by DavidG
	Courage to Change October 31 (Preview) With apologies for the lateness of today's post: In today's reading from Courage to Change, the author reflects on the way they have made choices throughout their life. Upon reflection, the author realized that most of their choices had been made as a reaction to fear. (An appropriate topic for th...	Skorpi	2	1622	Nov 1, 2019 by Lyne
	The Cage (Preview) I remember growing up. My parents were both problem drinkers. There was always a lot of arguing and sometimes fighting which almost always resulted in my mother getting the crap kicked out of her. This always meant a trip to the hotel for us, or sometimes we would go visit my aunt. She lived on a farm. I le...	Wolfie55	5	3644	Nov 1, 2019 by PosiesandPuppies
	Meeting help (Preview) After a few weeks of separation from my wife I have decided it is time to get myself to some meetings. My question is would I benefit from Al-anon meetings even though she is a cocaine and opioid abuser? Finding a nar-anon meeting is proving to be much more difficult than an Alanon meeting. It seems to me...	Chicagopilot	10	762	Oct 31, 2019 by Freetime
	C2C, 10/28 (Preview) For Monday, 10/28, the author discusses their attitudes towards others, both negative and positive. They note when they accept someone unconditionally, they feel safer. On the other hand, when defensive and impatient, the author expects others to be unkind to them. The writer says its in thei...	Lyne	5	3473	Oct 31, 2019 by Maresie888
	Life Just Happens (Preview) Haven't been around much recently. I was sick a while ago, bad cold, it got really bad one day so i went to the hospital with the hopes of getting some heavy duty antibiotics. They didn't let me leave for 6 days. Turns out I had pneumonia in both lungs and was suffering a side effect of one of my diabetes med...	Wolfie55	10	3737	Oct 30, 2019 by Wolfie55
	C2C reading 10-29 (Preview) The C2C reading for today October 29 speaks about being sensitive and blaming others for our feelings. The reading provides an example of someone who has taken a woman's inventory about her weight which enraged the person , who pointed out their concerns. the person who had taken issue wi...	hotrod	7	2360	Oct 30, 2019 by Maresie888
	For those that left... ah leaving (Preview) I'm new to Al-Anon. My husband is an alcoholic and is currently in a 28 day rehab program and has just finished his first week. He left after one day previously, but checked himself back in. I'm an American living in his home country of Ireland (we met in the states and moved back three years ago). We have t...	expat78	6	5814	Oct 30, 2019 by Aloha
	Courage to Change October 30 (Preview) In today's reading, the author shares that, when they first came to Al-Anon, they heard some people say that they were grateful to be involved with an alcoholic. Naturally, the author thought these people were crazy. Weren't the alcoholics the cause of everyone's problems in Al-Anon? And yet, the a...	Skorpi	4	1001	Oct 30, 2019 by Iamhere
	A work in progress (Preview) Working a program is hard work, it isnt easy becoming aware of yourself. It was not easy for me to stop blaming everything about myself on my parents, and my ex alcoholic husband after getting away from all my abusers, I took time alone with my kids in tow and went to al-anon meetings, found a sponsor and w...	Breakingfree	10	873	Oct 30, 2019 by PosiesandPuppies
	Abusive situation- Advice needed! (Preview) My adult daughter who has been to rehab 7 times and sober living twice, got engaged to a heavy drinker about 6 months ago, after dating for almost 4 years. He has been witness to 3 of her relapses, two of which have required 30 day rehabs. Since the engagement, she has relapsed again, and appears they both...	Buckeye Girl	4	4485	Oct 29, 2019 by mamalioness
	Freedom from fear... (Preview) I used to hear: "I am my own worst enemy!" That is about self-sabotage. And I have seen it in other often- where it is much easier to detect. But in myself- pernicious! I have seen myself in East Texas- admittedly in a stressful situation- trying to put diesel in a petrol rental car. Admittedly the co...	DavidG	5	3388	Oct 29, 2019 by DavidG
	On a tightrope...??? (Preview) Hi y'all, I hear people talking about stormy seas- and I use these images too. My life fell apart when i was in school. My history teacher had an MA. He told me I was capable of being a University Lecturer. So i high have been smarter than him. Or, more likely had more opportunity than he ha...	DavidG	4	2260	Oct 29, 2019 by Maresie888
	Acronyms (Preview) I see a lot of use of acronyms here and being new to the board I am not sure what they all mean. Is there any place that has them all listed?	Chicagopilot	2	3535	Oct 29, 2019 by hotrod
	Great Day for an Attitude of Gratitude (Preview) Good morning MIP. We have colder weather this morning, the start of the last season of 4...as I sit here and reflect on my day and my life, it dawned on me that Today is a great day for an attitude of gratitude. I am grateful for a program of recovery that gives me a variety of tools to use to live life on life'...	Iamhere	14	2550	Oct 28, 2019 by Aloha
	The 3 "C"s... looking forwards... (Preview) Hi y'all... ...there are two aspects to this share... ...along the way sharing has become second nature to me. It has bought me out of my shell. It has given me discipline, over time. But I still love doing it, and I always shall. I know- in the beginning- I didn't cause it, can't control it, an...	DavidG	3	3751	Oct 28, 2019 by Aloha
	not a good moment, but I'm so sick of being the sane one. (Preview) Hi there. Tonight I did something totally out of character for me. But it felt fairly liberating. AH and I were having yet another round of the same fight we've had for decades. When he got tired of what I had to say he went to get a drink out of the fridge. And then I got tired of that. So I went right behind him...	Fedora	9	1893	Oct 28, 2019 by Aloha
	Hope for Today Oct 27 (Preview) Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about how our self esteem can be affected after having lived with alcoholism. Dealing with the disease is a sure way to stamp down any sense of confidence and self worth. The writer describes how over time, attending meetings, finding a sponsor, were all way...	yanksfan51	4	2110	Oct 27, 2019 by hotrod
	Towards the end of the middle steps... (Preview) "With the help of Alanon friends. sponsor, literature, and our Higher Power, we learn to distinguish the real from the imagined, the harm from the legitimate boundary, the deed from the fallible doer- and perhaps we can eventually polish the tarnish past into a treasured antique. Many of us feel...	DavidG	3	532	Oct 27, 2019 by PosiesandPuppies
	Hot Puppies! (Preview) That went really well. One of the sites in question was smaller than I heard the first time, by a factor of 10 The procedure((s) were hardly painful at all. And the nurse said even if--they aren't likely to recommend chemo or radiation in my case. So that is great--Even if, I won't have to arm-wrestle...	Temple	7	818	Oct 27, 2019 by Maresie888
	Gosh life is so hard (Preview) What a hard life	mamalioness	10	709	Oct 25, 2019 by mamalioness
	I know this isn't Al-anon, but the pain is (Preview) My old doggie's back legs gave out on her AGAIN and this time there is no fixing it I can't get her into my truck and I can't afford (with no job, still) a huge vet bill to euthanize, so I called the animal shelter and they will help me....Sad, I can't hold her while she passes, but I am medicating her with my an...	mamalioness	14	3901	Oct 25, 2019 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change, 10/25 (Preview) Today's author found that being too passive was a defect of character: letting things happen to them, rather than taking action. It was the best they knew how to do at the time, but harm was done. Now, the way they make amends is to stop practicing the defect. They take action in all areas of life, and tak...	Freetime	6	654	Oct 25, 2019 by hotrod
	Thanks everyone (Preview) Thanks to everyone for the love and prayers. Please keep them coming. I am still expecting a miraculous outcome. I am to have two biopsies in another two weeks. And I'll have tiny titanium markers inserted. That cracked me up. Here's hoping, and praying, that DDH can suck it up and not throw any t...	Temple	13	4876	Oct 25, 2019 by Maresie888
	Getting off the pity pot... when...??? (Preview) Hi y'all... I no longer live the life of a victim- at least I don't think so. My first ten years of Alanon were unstructured sharing. It felt like everyone sponsored everyone else, within the group. And I was around when sponsorship came into vogue- and i got a sponsor. What happened that ther...	DavidG	15	6166	Oct 24, 2019 by DavidG
	Courage to Change 10/24 (Preview) Good morning MIP. Happy Thursday to one and all. Today's reading compares the process of recovery to the peeling of an onion or the growth of a birch tree. In both scenarios, there is a process of growth, shedding, healing, etc. We peel away a layer at a time with an onion, often shedding a few tears a...	Iamhere	4	1380	Oct 24, 2019 by mamalioness
	One day at a time in Alanon October 23 (Preview) Todays entry talks about examining a common place familiar phrase. A lot of times we are told to meditate on it, or take it apart and explore it. We are advised to stand in our own light, how clearly the picture emerges of our shadowing our own happiness by mistaken thinking. Maybe we should just stand ou...	mamalioness	3	2433	Oct 24, 2019 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change October 23 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading from C2C, the author shares that, while sobriety brings change, it doesn't take away all the problems. The author was sure that the nightmare was over once the alcholic became sober. Instead, the alcoholic accused, insulted, and attacked, becoming verbally abusive...	Skorpi	6	578	Oct 24, 2019 by Aloha
	Pretty depressed. (Preview) Progressive, alcoholism is progressive. Things are bad here. The alcoholic mother is at the height of her lifelong irresponsibly selfish and foul natured best. I'm torn between wanting to cut and run or have her committed. I can't believe my life sees me faced with the burden of someone who is me...	a4l	15	6021	Oct 23, 2019 by KT2015
	HELLO Everyone!!! Its been a long time!!! (Preview) Hi Everyone!!! Wish I had good news on my part, but last week I lost 1/2 of my income , losing my largest client. I am clinging to my program and my HP and a few trusted recovery mates and close family/friends , doing affirmations, yoga, casting burden to my HP within me, I'm doing it ALL to fight off the fear...	mamalioness	28	6457	Oct 23, 2019 by mamalioness
	Today's Hope Oct. 16 (Preview) Hello MIP! I'm at a conference today, so taking today's reading from Today's Hope. The author shares that sometimes they can feel really alone or afraid. They have discovered that in these times, they are often focusing on their own problems and perspectives. They have the ability to help others o...	Skorpi	5	5115	Oct 22, 2019 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change 10/17 (Preview) Today's reading is about Tradition 9 - "Our groups, as such, ought never be organized; but we may create service boards or committees directly responsible to those they serve." (This is also the quote for the day!) Today's reminder is "If I take on service responsibilities in my group, it does not me...	Iamhere	4	1918	Oct 22, 2019 by mamalioness
	ODAT READING 10-22 (Preview) The ODAT reading fort today stresses the importance of examining our motive in order to uncover our negative destructive attitudes It points out that we have many positive qualities so that we must also embrace them and remember the Walt wthimqn quote;' i am larger better than I thought i did not k...	hotrod	4	5777	Oct 22, 2019 by mamalioness
	Wife of alcoholic trying to sell house (Preview) Hello, Im new here but have been dealing with an alcoholic husband to long. As is often the case I find myself having to support our family with one income instead of the two we used to have. I cant afford our house and need to sell desperately. However my husband pretty much spends all his time laying on th...	Chocolatelover	6	3086	Oct 22, 2019 by Maresie888
	I am well... (Preview) I am willing & able to maintain my recovery. I am currently trying to stop taking other's inventories & focus on mine. & what people think of me is none of my business. It is nice to be important but it is more important to be nice. Just a few thoughts.	Hoot Nanny	5	2632	Oct 21, 2019 by Iamhere
	C2C, 10/21 (Preview) The reading for Monday, 10/21, talks about how to find faith, how to figure out what HP wants for us, and how to stop feeling powerless, helpless, hopeless, and frightened. The author feels they struggle with these issues even though they try to find HPs guidance. Some of the answers are to ask for cl...	Lyne	3	3171	Oct 21, 2019 by Iamhere
	Steps 10-11-12... (Preview) Hi y'all, ...when i joined the MIP online groups- I picked up a saying- that made the steps and serenity prayer much more simple- to hold in my hand, as it were. Poco a poco, paso a paso, dia por dia... little by little, step by step, day by day. And so I achieved the 'one day at a time' goal- being ab...	DavidG	3	4195	Oct 21, 2019 by JerryF
	Need help with smells (Preview) Ok--this might be insanely stupid--but I am hypersensitive to certain smells cigarettes, bbq, pot, air vent/manufactuing smells, tar...). Particularly the smell of beer. (I was this way when I was pregnant so I am not sure if its menopause hormones now). When my AH has a beer open I can smell it as...	Dancer66	15	5833	Oct 21, 2019 by PosiesandPuppies
	Hope for Today Oct 20 (Preview) Good morning everyone- For me, there is quite a bit that resonates from todays page. The writer describes his/her first Alanon mtg, where a woman describes loneliness as being dark and lonely, like the bottom of a well. This struck the writer, along with the idea that the tools and practices of the...	yanksfan51	6	2439	Oct 20, 2019 by DavidG
	C2C, October 18 – Progress not Perfection (Preview) Today's reading in Courage to Change points out that our recovery gives us opportunities to continually deepen our learning. For example, we may have learned detachment in one situation, and then as life moves on, we encounter a new situation where we need to apply detachment. Even though apply...	Freetime	3	3050	Oct 19, 2019 by Iamhere
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.