Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

Working a program is hard work, it isnt easy becoming aware of yourself. It was not easy for me to stop blaming everything about myself on my parents, and my ex alcoholic husband after getting away from all my abusers, I took time alone with my kids in tow and went to al-anon meetings, found a sponsor and w...

Buckeye Girl · Buckeye Girl

My adult daughter who has been to rehab 7 times and sober living twice, got engaged to a heavy drinker about 6 months ago, after dating for almost 4 years. He has been witness to 3 of her relapses, two of which have required 30 day rehabs. Since the engagement, she has relapsed again, and appears they both...

DavidG · DavidG

I used to hear: "I am my own worst enemy!" That is about self-sabotage. And I have seen it in other often- where it is much easier to detect. But in myself- pernicious! I have seen myself in East Texas- admittedly in a stressful situation- trying to put diesel in a petrol rental car. Admittedly the co...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all, I hear people talking about stormy seas- and I use these images too. My life fell apart when i was in school. My history teacher had an MA. He told me I was capable of being a University Lecturer. So i high have been smarter than him. Or, more likely had more opportunity than he ha...

Chicagopilot · Chicagopilot

I see a lot of use of acronyms here and being new to the board I am not sure what they all mean. Is there any place that has them all listed?

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP. We have colder weather this morning, the start of the last season of 4...as I sit here and reflect on my day and my life, it dawned on me that Today is a great day for an attitude of gratitude. I am grateful for a program of recovery that gives me a variety of tools to use to live life on life'...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all... ...there are two aspects to this share... ...along the way sharing has become second nature to me. It has bought me out of my shell. It has given me discipline, over time. But I still love doing it, and I always shall. I know- in the beginning- I didn't cause it, can't control it, an...

Fedora · Fedora

Hi there. Tonight I did something totally out of character for me. But it felt fairly liberating. AH and I were having yet another round of the same fight we've had for decades. When he got tired of what I had to say he went to get a drink out of the fridge. And then I got tired of that. So I went right behind him...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about how our self esteem can be affected after having lived with alcoholism. Dealing with the disease is a sure way to stamp down any sense of confidence and self worth. The writer describes how over time, attending meetings, finding a sponsor, were all way...

DavidG · DavidG

"With the help of Alanon friends. sponsor, literature, and our Higher Power, we learn to distinguish the real from the imagined, the harm from the legitimate boundary, the deed from the fallible doer- and perhaps we can eventually polish the tarnish past into a treasured antique. Many of us feel...

Temple · Temple

That went really well. One of the sites in question was smaller than I heard the first time, by a factor of 10 The procedure((s) were hardly painful at all. And the nurse said even if--they aren't likely to recommend chemo or radiation in my case. So that is great--Even if, I won't have to arm-wrestle...

mamalioness · mamalioness

What a hard life

mamalioness · mamalioness

My old doggie's back legs gave out on her AGAIN and this time there is no fixing it I can't get her into my truck and I can't afford (with no job, still) a huge vet bill to euthanize, so I called the animal shelter and they will help me....Sad, I can't hold her while she passes, but I am medicating her with my an...

Freetime · Freetime

Today's author found that being too passive was a defect of character: letting things happen to them, rather than taking action. It was the best they knew how to do at the time, but harm was done. Now, the way they make amends is to stop practicing the defect. They take action in all areas of life, and tak...

Temple · Temple

Thanks to everyone for the love and prayers. Please keep them coming. I am still expecting a miraculous outcome. I am to have two biopsies in another two weeks. And I'll have tiny titanium markers inserted. That cracked me up. Here's hoping, and praying, that DDH can suck it up and not throw any t...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all... I no longer live the life of a victim- at least I don't think so. My first ten years of Alanon were unstructured sharing. It felt like everyone sponsored everyone else, within the group. And I was around when sponsorship came into vogue- and i got a sponsor. What happened that ther...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP. Happy Thursday to one and all. Today's reading compares the process of recovery to the peeling of an onion or the growth of a birch tree. In both scenarios, there is a process of growth, shedding, healing, etc. We peel away a layer at a time with an onion, often shedding a few tears a...

mamalioness · mamalioness

Todays entry talks about examining a common place familiar phrase. A lot of times we are told to meditate on it, or take it apart and explore it. We are advised to stand in our own light, how clearly the picture emerges of our shadowing our own happiness by mistaken thinking. Maybe we should just stand ou...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading from C2C, the author shares that, while sobriety brings change, it doesn't take away all the problems. The author was sure that the nightmare was over once the alcholic became sober. Instead, the alcoholic accused, insulted, and attacked, becoming verbally abusive...

a4l · a4l

Progressive, alcoholism is progressive. Things are bad here. The alcoholic mother is at the height of her lifelong irresponsibly selfish and foul natured best. I'm torn between wanting to cut and run or have her committed. I can't believe my life sees me faced with the burden of someone who is me...

mamalioness · mamalioness

Hi Everyone!!! Wish I had good news on my part, but last week I lost 1/2 of my income , losing my largest client. I am clinging to my program and my HP and a few trusted recovery mates and close family/friends , doing affirmations, yoga, casting burden to my HP within me, I'm doing it ALL to fight off the fear...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! I'm at a conference today, so taking today's reading from Today's Hope. The author shares that sometimes they can feel really alone or afraid. They have discovered that in these times, they are often focusing on their own problems and perspectives. They have the ability to help others o...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading is about Tradition 9 - "Our groups, as such, ought never be organized; but we may create service boards or committees directly responsible to those they serve." (This is also the quote for the day!) Today's reminder is "If I take on service responsibilities in my group, it does not me...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading fort today stresses the importance of examining our motive in order to uncover our negative destructive attitudes It points out that we have many positive qualities so that we must also embrace them and remember the Walt wthimqn quote;' i am larger better than I thought i did not k...

Chocolatelover · Chocolatelover

Hello, Im new here but have been dealing with an alcoholic husband to long. As is often the case I find myself having to support our family with one income instead of the two we used to have. I cant afford our house and need to sell desperately. However my husband pretty much spends all his time laying on th...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am willing & able to maintain my recovery. I am currently trying to stop taking other's inventories & focus on mine. & what people think of me is none of my business. It is nice to be important but it is more important to be nice. Just a few thoughts.

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for Monday, 10/21, talks about how to find faith, how to figure out what HP wants for us, and how to stop feeling powerless, helpless, hopeless, and frightened. The author feels they struggle with these issues even though they try to find HPs guidance. Some of the answers are to ask for cl...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all, ...when i joined the MIP online groups- I picked up a saying- that made the steps and serenity prayer much more simple- to hold in my hand, as it were. Poco a poco, paso a paso, dia por dia... little by little, step by step, day by day. And so I achieved the 'one day at a time' goal- being ab...

Dancer66 · Dancer66

Ok--this might be insanely stupid--but I am hypersensitive to certain smells cigarettes, bbq, pot, air vent/manufactuing smells, tar...). Particularly the smell of beer. (I was this way when I was pregnant so I am not sure if its menopause hormones now). When my AH has a beer open I can smell it as...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- For me, there is quite a bit that resonates from todays page. The writer describes his/her first Alanon mtg, where a woman describes loneliness as being dark and lonely, like the bottom of a well. This struck the writer, along with the idea that the tools and practices of the...

Freetime · Freetime

Today's reading in Courage to Change points out that our recovery gives us opportunities to continually deepen our learning. For example, we may have learned detachment in one situation, and then as life moves on, we encounter a new situation where we need to apply detachment. Even though apply...

2HP · 2HP

There was a time when I really struggled with everything that had happened between me and my alcoholic husband... and all that was currently happening following the divorce... all the trials blowing me around and around.... One particular day, my mood was seriously in the dumpster... sponsor wa...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I'm irritable and I'm sure much is hormone related, I have take steps to relieve that stress however I am finding my patience is very nil at the moment. The other gal in my office has quit. My partner in crime as I say is out of the country visiting family at the moment, thankfully she will be back on Monda...

Aloha · Aloha

Hi everyone, In a couple weeks I'm going to be going to a retreat where the primary focus is Al-Anon thought it's not an official Al-Anon event. I was asked to lead a meeting on a portion of the St. Francis prayer (during the whole retreat, others will be leading on other portions of the St. Francis prayer...

hotrod · hotrod

Courage to change reading for today October 15 speaks about the power of detachment. It points out that forgiveness is a great form of detachment because it helps us to let go of our resentments and anger. The reading suggested that we do not pronounce a person innocent and wipe the slate clean. no...

Lyne · Lyne

The reading for Monday, 10/14, is a share about faulty thinking and how step 10 can help. The author assumes they know how everything should be done, that other people do not recognize this great gift, that ignoring their feelings is practical, and that there is no reason to turn to HP. Wrong! The au...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all... some would say that the A. is a perfectionist. And never ever come sup to the standard set? For me it is but goals, and a vision... of a better life and a better world. And finding limits- that did not exist before. Boundaries. I was never raped or beaten. Our family was grossly passive a...

JerryF · JerryF

In a short time I will leave home again (Hawaiii) and move back up to the Central Valley of CA. Do I wanna? Kinda sorta. I have to be fair honest and just with and to my wife who came here 25 years ago to be with me not that I needed her to be and she came anyway willingly and involved. Now it is her time and...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about the power of One Day at a Time. This slogan, and living it, can be one of the most difficult for those of us who get stuck in the past or are consumed with the future. The writer acknowledges this and adds that step 11, seeking out our HPs will and the power to c...

Evelyn123 · Evelyn123

I'm new to all of this, and I'm trying to learn. I've always know my AH drank too much and may have a problem, but a month ago, new information came out and there was no denying he was an alcoholic. He admitted this, and is now in a rehab center for the past 2 weeks. I went to my first Al Anon meeting last week, wh...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all... ... ...it is still chilly here- even though it is supposed to be spring. Slept well and deeply last night. I still get tingling in my little fingers- both hands. This was an age old symptom of migraine- tingling in lips and the fingers- and light in my eyes. These days I take a powe...

Temple · Temple

During the ultrasound, suddenly the line came to me: "In the room, the women come and go... Talking of Michaelangelo." T. S. Eliot, The Lovesong of J. Alfred Prufrock Had to share--Laughter is, to me, very therapeutic. In my first Al-Anon meeting, the sweet young thing...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

Hi Everyone, It's been awhile. I've been reading here mostly. I just wanted to provide an update about the contract job I have. Many of you were so supportive and encouraging. The job is now being offered as a full time job with benefits. I can apply if I'm interested. I worked so hard at this position to c...

sunmustshine · sunmustshine

Can you relate to the place you find yourself in recovery when things go pretty well and you feel strong, but that nagging unsettled feeling persists? You do all of the program things, gratitude list, serenity prayer, but thats feeling sits like a monkey on your back? You dont even know what to call it,...

Ann_Y · Ann_Y

I think my AH is nearing the end of his fight with the disease. He has basically given up and nothing will stop him from his self destruction. He was in the hospital for a week and went right back to the bottle as soon as he was home. He is on full tilt. I moved out and refuse to see him when he is drinking. I keep c...

Freetime · Freetime

Today's reading discusses learning about the disease of alcoholism -- and also cautions us not to let the disease concept lead us into "analysis paralysis." Our own recovery is our focus, and it is wise not to become obsessed with another person's disease. I apologize for such a short summary. I do...

hotrod · hotrod

C2C reading for Wednesday, October 9 speaks about trusting in God. Many times we are at war with Godh not wanting to surrender our will. I know I was. When I entered program and discovered that I needed to trust HP and surrender because i was powerless it took quite some time for me to surrende...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all... A gratitude share...? But even more low-key than that. it is Friday morning here. Cool and overcast. Just finding a little space, in the rooms. Which is a bit of a joke- because there is no door, walls, or a roof! I have been to 1000's of meetings... maybe tens of thousands. I re...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP. Today's reading is about the Serenity Prayer and how we can use it in recovery. The writer describes a winding road on a hillside from childhood. As a child, the writer had fear that the car would swerve too widely, and they would go over the edge. The writer would grab hold of the do...

andromeda · andromeda

My son is starting to sound a lot like his alcoholic father with a defeatist attitude and beating himself up along the way. He's his own worst critic. Nothing I say really makes a difference so I've started to just back away and let him figure things out for himself. He didn't attend college this past...

a4l · a4l

My mother is an alcoholic in denial. And she is old and not in good health. The actual person inside of her was gifted at end of life care which she did professionally and seemed to be called to do by design many times. She has provided exceptional end of life care for three elderly persons in our family and...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for today, October 8 speaks of the importance of gratitude. It suggests that often we arrive at the doors ofr Al-Anon angry and fearful. WE lave lost faith in god and often miss his manacles that often touch our lives Alanon welcomed me in and offered constructive tools to live by s...

Lyne · Lyne

Not a happy Sunday for me, but thanks to program Im not insane or codependent either. I also gave up the doormat club which my A hates. Its nothing new, it started last night and carried into this morning. Im stronger and coping better. I feel sad but Im OK too. My A says very hurtful things that at lea...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I have found great relief in this fact and it's actually an internal boundary for me at the moment. I do not need to have all the answers. Probably because I don't know as much as I think I do. My knowledge is based upon my experience some areas I have a lot in and some not so much. This is part of the way I pr...

DavidG · DavidG

... This wasn't planned- it just happened. In my home group we had a different chair each week. If we could be picked the chair for the next meeting, from the current meeting. The chair got to pick how the meeting was run. A reading- from the daily reader, a topic, or whatever. If here was a slight change...

DavidG · DavidG

Our kid brother was the typical lost child. He went away overseas, and over time cut all ties. We knew where he was because we searched for him. Last time I tried to make contact within, unsuccessfully. But I did make contact with his landlord and was able to keep tabs on him. 18 months before he passed th...

Lyne · Lyne

The writer on Monday, 10/7, discusses frustration and impatience when change cannot happen quickly. We learn that things cannot happen on the schedule we want. The author says though, that waiting time does not have to be wasted time. Even times of stillness can be a teaching/learning moment....

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about choices that we have in our life. How do we know if we are making the right choice? What if we pick the wrong path? The writer describes a feeling of chaos when he/she goes to an alanon mtg. The group mentions a path outside that will lead to a decided and p...

Buckeye Girl · Buckeye Girl

My adult daughter has relapsed again, and m so worried about her! I woke up a few minutes ago from a terrible nightmare about her, and had a panic attack. She lives about 2,000 miles away, in a different time zone, and I really want to text to see if she is ok, but don't want her fiancé to intercept. should t...

Freetime · Freetime

In today's ODAT reading, members talk about how they handle blaming and finger-pointing directed at them by someone else. One member does not internalize the harsh words or argue with them, but tries to have compassion when someone is lashing out because of their need to unload their own guilt. Ano...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	A work in progress (Preview) Working a program is hard work, it isnt easy becoming aware of yourself. It was not easy for me to stop blaming everything about myself on my parents, and my ex alcoholic husband after getting away from all my abusers, I took time alone with my kids in tow and went to al-anon meetings, found a sponsor and w...	Breakingfree	10	790	Oct 30, 2019 by PosiesandPuppies
	Abusive situation- Advice needed! (Preview) My adult daughter who has been to rehab 7 times and sober living twice, got engaged to a heavy drinker about 6 months ago, after dating for almost 4 years. He has been witness to 3 of her relapses, two of which have required 30 day rehabs. Since the engagement, she has relapsed again, and appears they both...	Buckeye Girl	4	3962	Oct 29, 2019 by mamalioness
	Freedom from fear... (Preview) I used to hear: "I am my own worst enemy!" That is about self-sabotage. And I have seen it in other often- where it is much easier to detect. But in myself- pernicious! I have seen myself in East Texas- admittedly in a stressful situation- trying to put diesel in a petrol rental car. Admittedly the co...	DavidG	5	3081	Oct 29, 2019 by DavidG
	On a tightrope...??? (Preview) Hi y'all, I hear people talking about stormy seas- and I use these images too. My life fell apart when i was in school. My history teacher had an MA. He told me I was capable of being a University Lecturer. So i high have been smarter than him. Or, more likely had more opportunity than he ha...	DavidG	4	2188	Oct 29, 2019 by Maresie888
	Acronyms (Preview) I see a lot of use of acronyms here and being new to the board I am not sure what they all mean. Is there any place that has them all listed?	Chicagopilot	2	3191	Oct 29, 2019 by hotrod
	Great Day for an Attitude of Gratitude (Preview) Good morning MIP. We have colder weather this morning, the start of the last season of 4...as I sit here and reflect on my day and my life, it dawned on me that Today is a great day for an attitude of gratitude. I am grateful for a program of recovery that gives me a variety of tools to use to live life on life'...	Iamhere	14	2303	Oct 28, 2019 by Aloha
	The 3 "C"s... looking forwards... (Preview) Hi y'all... ...there are two aspects to this share... ...along the way sharing has become second nature to me. It has bought me out of my shell. It has given me discipline, over time. But I still love doing it, and I always shall. I know- in the beginning- I didn't cause it, can't control it, an...	DavidG	3	3500	Oct 28, 2019 by Aloha
	not a good moment, but I'm so sick of being the sane one. (Preview) Hi there. Tonight I did something totally out of character for me. But it felt fairly liberating. AH and I were having yet another round of the same fight we've had for decades. When he got tired of what I had to say he went to get a drink out of the fridge. And then I got tired of that. So I went right behind him...	Fedora	9	1738	Oct 28, 2019 by Aloha
	Hope for Today Oct 27 (Preview) Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about how our self esteem can be affected after having lived with alcoholism. Dealing with the disease is a sure way to stamp down any sense of confidence and self worth. The writer describes how over time, attending meetings, finding a sponsor, were all way...	yanksfan51	4	1915	Oct 27, 2019 by hotrod
	Towards the end of the middle steps... (Preview) "With the help of Alanon friends. sponsor, literature, and our Higher Power, we learn to distinguish the real from the imagined, the harm from the legitimate boundary, the deed from the fallible doer- and perhaps we can eventually polish the tarnish past into a treasured antique. Many of us feel...	DavidG	3	447	Oct 27, 2019 by PosiesandPuppies
	Hot Puppies! (Preview) That went really well. One of the sites in question was smaller than I heard the first time, by a factor of 10 The procedure((s) were hardly painful at all. And the nurse said even if--they aren't likely to recommend chemo or radiation in my case. So that is great--Even if, I won't have to arm-wrestle...	Temple	7	761	Oct 27, 2019 by Maresie888
	Gosh life is so hard (Preview) What a hard life	mamalioness	10	664	Oct 25, 2019 by mamalioness
	I know this isn't Al-anon, but the pain is (Preview) My old doggie's back legs gave out on her AGAIN and this time there is no fixing it I can't get her into my truck and I can't afford (with no job, still) a huge vet bill to euthanize, so I called the animal shelter and they will help me....Sad, I can't hold her while she passes, but I am medicating her with my an...	mamalioness	14	3590	Oct 25, 2019 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change, 10/25 (Preview) Today's author found that being too passive was a defect of character: letting things happen to them, rather than taking action. It was the best they knew how to do at the time, but harm was done. Now, the way they make amends is to stop practicing the defect. They take action in all areas of life, and tak...	Freetime	6	597	Oct 25, 2019 by hotrod
	Thanks everyone (Preview) Thanks to everyone for the love and prayers. Please keep them coming. I am still expecting a miraculous outcome. I am to have two biopsies in another two weeks. And I'll have tiny titanium markers inserted. That cracked me up. Here's hoping, and praying, that DDH can suck it up and not throw any t...	Temple	13	4393	Oct 25, 2019 by Maresie888
	Getting off the pity pot... when...??? (Preview) Hi y'all... I no longer live the life of a victim- at least I don't think so. My first ten years of Alanon were unstructured sharing. It felt like everyone sponsored everyone else, within the group. And I was around when sponsorship came into vogue- and i got a sponsor. What happened that ther...	DavidG	15	5596	Oct 24, 2019 by DavidG
	Courage to Change 10/24 (Preview) Good morning MIP. Happy Thursday to one and all. Today's reading compares the process of recovery to the peeling of an onion or the growth of a birch tree. In both scenarios, there is a process of growth, shedding, healing, etc. We peel away a layer at a time with an onion, often shedding a few tears a...	Iamhere	4	1326	Oct 24, 2019 by mamalioness
	One day at a time in Alanon October 23 (Preview) Todays entry talks about examining a common place familiar phrase. A lot of times we are told to meditate on it, or take it apart and explore it. We are advised to stand in our own light, how clearly the picture emerges of our shadowing our own happiness by mistaken thinking. Maybe we should just stand ou...	mamalioness	3	2116	Oct 24, 2019 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change October 23 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading from C2C, the author shares that, while sobriety brings change, it doesn't take away all the problems. The author was sure that the nightmare was over once the alcholic became sober. Instead, the alcoholic accused, insulted, and attacked, becoming verbally abusive...	Skorpi	6	519	Oct 24, 2019 by Aloha
	Pretty depressed. (Preview) Progressive, alcoholism is progressive. Things are bad here. The alcoholic mother is at the height of her lifelong irresponsibly selfish and foul natured best. I'm torn between wanting to cut and run or have her committed. I can't believe my life sees me faced with the burden of someone who is me...	a4l	15	5472	Oct 23, 2019 by KT2015
	HELLO Everyone!!! Its been a long time!!! (Preview) Hi Everyone!!! Wish I had good news on my part, but last week I lost 1/2 of my income , losing my largest client. I am clinging to my program and my HP and a few trusted recovery mates and close family/friends , doing affirmations, yoga, casting burden to my HP within me, I'm doing it ALL to fight off the fear...	mamalioness	28	5823	Oct 23, 2019 by mamalioness
	Today's Hope Oct. 16 (Preview) Hello MIP! I'm at a conference today, so taking today's reading from Today's Hope. The author shares that sometimes they can feel really alone or afraid. They have discovered that in these times, they are often focusing on their own problems and perspectives. They have the ability to help others o...	Skorpi	5	4586	Oct 22, 2019 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change 10/17 (Preview) Today's reading is about Tradition 9 - "Our groups, as such, ought never be organized; but we may create service boards or committees directly responsible to those they serve." (This is also the quote for the day!) Today's reminder is "If I take on service responsibilities in my group, it does not me...	Iamhere	4	1814	Oct 22, 2019 by mamalioness
	ODAT READING 10-22 (Preview) The ODAT reading fort today stresses the importance of examining our motive in order to uncover our negative destructive attitudes It points out that we have many positive qualities so that we must also embrace them and remember the Walt wthimqn quote;' i am larger better than I thought i did not k...	hotrod	4	5151	Oct 22, 2019 by mamalioness
	Wife of alcoholic trying to sell house (Preview) Hello, Im new here but have been dealing with an alcoholic husband to long. As is often the case I find myself having to support our family with one income instead of the two we used to have. I cant afford our house and need to sell desperately. However my husband pretty much spends all his time laying on th...	Chocolatelover	6	2800	Oct 22, 2019 by Maresie888
	I am well... (Preview) I am willing & able to maintain my recovery. I am currently trying to stop taking other's inventories & focus on mine. & what people think of me is none of my business. It is nice to be important but it is more important to be nice. Just a few thoughts.	Hoot Nanny	5	2477	Oct 21, 2019 by Iamhere
	C2C, 10/21 (Preview) The reading for Monday, 10/21, talks about how to find faith, how to figure out what HP wants for us, and how to stop feeling powerless, helpless, hopeless, and frightened. The author feels they struggle with these issues even though they try to find HPs guidance. Some of the answers are to ask for cl...	Lyne	3	2866	Oct 21, 2019 by Iamhere
	Steps 10-11-12... (Preview) Hi y'all, ...when i joined the MIP online groups- I picked up a saying- that made the steps and serenity prayer much more simple- to hold in my hand, as it were. Poco a poco, paso a paso, dia por dia... little by little, step by step, day by day. And so I achieved the 'one day at a time' goal- being ab...	DavidG	3	3849	Oct 21, 2019 by JerryF
	Need help with smells (Preview) Ok--this might be insanely stupid--but I am hypersensitive to certain smells cigarettes, bbq, pot, air vent/manufactuing smells, tar...). Particularly the smell of beer. (I was this way when I was pregnant so I am not sure if its menopause hormones now). When my AH has a beer open I can smell it as...	Dancer66	15	5313	Oct 21, 2019 by PosiesandPuppies
	Hope for Today Oct 20 (Preview) Good morning everyone- For me, there is quite a bit that resonates from todays page. The writer describes his/her first Alanon mtg, where a woman describes loneliness as being dark and lonely, like the bottom of a well. This struck the writer, along with the idea that the tools and practices of the...	yanksfan51	6	2281	Oct 20, 2019 by DavidG
	C2C, October 18 – Progress not Perfection (Preview) Today's reading in Courage to Change points out that our recovery gives us opportunities to continually deepen our learning. For example, we may have learned detachment in one situation, and then as life moves on, we encounter a new situation where we need to apply detachment. Even though apply...	Freetime	3	2736	Oct 19, 2019 by Iamhere
	service work (Preview) There was a time when I really struggled with everything that had happened between me and my alcoholic husband... and all that was currently happening following the divorce... all the trials blowing me around and around.... One particular day, my mood was seriously in the dumpster... sponsor wa...	2HP	10	4933	Oct 19, 2019 by 2HP
	Struggling at the moment .. (Preview) I'm irritable and I'm sure much is hormone related, I have take steps to relieve that stress however I am finding my patience is very nil at the moment. The other gal in my office has quit. My partner in crime as I say is out of the country visiting family at the moment, thankfully she will be back on Monda...	SerenityRUS	22	5242	Oct 18, 2019 by 2HP
	Help, please? Input on a meeting topic (Preview) Hi everyone, In a couple weeks I'm going to be going to a retreat where the primary focus is Al-Anon thought it's not an official Al-Anon event. I was asked to lead a meeting on a portion of the St. Francis prayer (during the whole retreat, others will be leading on other portions of the St. Francis prayer...	Aloha	11	2267	Oct 16, 2019 by JerryF
	C2C reading 10-15 (Preview) Courage to change reading for today October 15 speaks about the power of detachment. It points out that forgiveness is a great form of detachment because it helps us to let go of our resentments and anger. The reading suggested that we do not pronounce a person innocent and wipe the slate clean. no...	hotrod	5	509	Oct 15, 2019 by JerryF
	C2C, 10/14 (Preview) The reading for Monday, 10/14, is a share about faulty thinking and how step 10 can help. The author assumes they know how everything should be done, that other people do not recognize this great gift, that ignoring their feelings is practical, and that there is no reason to turn to HP. Wrong! The au...	Lyne	4	2504	Oct 15, 2019 by Iamhere
	Progress, not perfection... (Preview) Hi y'all... some would say that the A. is a perfectionist. And never ever come sup to the standard set? For me it is but goals, and a vision... of a better life and a better world. And finding limits- that did not exist before. Boundaries. I was never raped or beaten. Our family was grossly passive a...	DavidG	2	1783	Oct 14, 2019 by DavidG
	Changing what I can.... (Preview) In a short time I will leave home again (Hawaiii) and move back up to the Central Valley of CA. Do I wanna? Kinda sorta. I have to be fair honest and just with and to my wife who came here 25 years ago to be with me not that I needed her to be and she came anyway willingly and involved. Now it is her time and...	JerryF	8	3949	Oct 14, 2019 by Maresie888
	Hope for Today Oct 13 (Preview) Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about the power of One Day at a Time. This slogan, and living it, can be one of the most difficult for those of us who get stuck in the past or are consumed with the future. The writer acknowledges this and adds that step 11, seeking out our HPs will and the power to c...	yanksfan51	6	378	Oct 14, 2019 by mamalioness
	New to all this... Advice? (Preview) I'm new to all of this, and I'm trying to learn. I've always know my AH drank too much and may have a problem, but a month ago, new information came out and there was no denying he was an alcoholic. He admitted this, and is now in a rehab center for the past 2 weeks. I went to my first Al Anon meeting last week, wh...	Evelyn123	4	2181	Oct 13, 2019 by Iamhere
	Saturday morning share... steps 10 and 11... (Preview) Hi y'all... ... ...it is still chilly here- even though it is supposed to be spring. Slept well and deeply last night. I still get tingling in my little fingers- both hands. This was an age old symptom of migraine- tingling in lips and the fingers- and light in my eyes. These days I take a powe...	DavidG	7	2757	Oct 12, 2019 by Temple
	Must have engaged a nerve (Preview) During the ultrasound, suddenly the line came to me: "In the room, the women come and go... Talking of Michaelangelo." T. S. Eliot, The Lovesong of J. Alfred Prufrock Had to share--Laughter is, to me, very therapeutic. In my first Al-Anon meeting, the sweet young thing...	Temple	5	1854	Oct 12, 2019 by Temple
	Update on Job (Preview) Hi Everyone, It's been awhile. I've been reading here mostly. I just wanted to provide an update about the contract job I have. Many of you were so supportive and encouraging. The job is now being offered as a full time job with benefits. I can apply if I'm interested. I worked so hard at this position to c...	tiredtonite	5	2139	Oct 12, 2019 by mamalioness
	Knowing the Need (Preview) Can you relate to the place you find yourself in recovery when things go pretty well and you feel strong, but that nagging unsettled feeling persists? You do all of the program things, gratitude list, serenity prayer, but thats feeling sits like a monkey on your back? You dont even know what to call it,...	sunmustshine	5	3541	Oct 12, 2019 by Maresie888
	Welfare checks? (Preview) I think my AH is nearing the end of his fight with the disease. He has basically given up and nothing will stop him from his self destruction. He was in the hospital for a week and went right back to the bottle as soon as he was home. He is on full tilt. I moved out and refuse to see him when he is drinking. I keep c...	Ann_Y	6	2273	Oct 12, 2019 by Maresie888
	Courage to Change, October 11 (Preview) Today's reading discusses learning about the disease of alcoholism -- and also cautions us not to let the disease concept lead us into "analysis paralysis." Our own recovery is our focus, and it is wise not to become obsessed with another person's disease. I apologize for such a short summary. I do...	Freetime	6	2134	Oct 11, 2019 by El
	C2C Reading 10-9 (Preview) C2C reading for Wednesday, October 9 speaks about trusting in God. Many times we are at war with Godh not wanting to surrender our will. I know I was. When I entered program and discovered that I needed to trust HP and surrender because i was powerless it took quite some time for me to surrende...	hotrod	4	2128	Oct 10, 2019 by mamalioness
	Just a regular share... (Preview) Hi y'all... A gratitude share...? But even more low-key than that. it is Friday morning here. Cool and overcast. Just finding a little space, in the rooms. Which is a bit of a joke- because there is no door, walls, or a roof! I have been to 1000's of meetings... maybe tens of thousands. I re...	DavidG	1	1940	Oct 10, 2019 by hotrod
	Courage to Change 10/10 (Preview) Good morning MIP. Today's reading is about the Serenity Prayer and how we can use it in recovery. The writer describes a winding road on a hillside from childhood. As a child, the writer had fear that the car would swerve too widely, and they would go over the edge. The writer would grab hold of the do...	Iamhere	1	3430	Oct 10, 2019 by Lyne
	My son is directionless (Preview) My son is starting to sound a lot like his alcoholic father with a defeatist attitude and beating himself up along the way. He's his own worst critic. Nothing I say really makes a difference so I've started to just back away and let him figure things out for himself. He didn't attend college this past...	andromeda	15	1163	Oct 9, 2019 by SerenityRUS
	Tested by what is indeed testing. (Preview) My mother is an alcoholic in denial. And she is old and not in good health. The actual person inside of her was gifted at end of life care which she did professionally and seemed to be called to do by design many times. She has provided exceptional end of life care for three elderly persons in our family and...	a4l	12	4756	Oct 9, 2019 by SerenityRUS
	C2C 10-8 (Preview) The C2C reading for today, October 8 speaks of the importance of gratitude. It suggests that often we arrive at the doors ofr Al-Anon angry and fearful. WE lave lost faith in god and often miss his manacles that often touch our lives Alanon welcomed me in and offered constructive tools to live by s...	hotrod	9	1496	Oct 8, 2019 by mamalioness
	Rough time with A (Preview) Not a happy Sunday for me, but thanks to program Im not insane or codependent either. I also gave up the doormat club which my A hates. Its nothing new, it started last night and carried into this morning. Im stronger and coping better. I feel sad but Im OK too. My A says very hurtful things that at lea...	Lyne	7	673	Oct 8, 2019 by Maresie888
	I don't have to have all the answers .. (Preview) I have found great relief in this fact and it's actually an internal boundary for me at the moment. I do not need to have all the answers. Probably because I don't know as much as I think I do. My knowledge is based upon my experience some areas I have a lot in and some not so much. This is part of the way I pr...	SerenityRUS	6	762	Oct 8, 2019 by Maresie888
	How we dealt with group conscience, in the good old days... (Preview) ... This wasn't planned- it just happened. In my home group we had a different chair each week. If we could be picked the chair for the next meeting, from the current meeting. The chair got to pick how the meeting was run. A reading- from the daily reader, a topic, or whatever. If here was a slight change...	DavidG	23	5711	Oct 7, 2019 by Bo
	Grief and Closure (Preview) Our kid brother was the typical lost child. He went away overseas, and over time cut all ties. We knew where he was because we searched for him. Last time I tried to make contact within, unsuccessfully. But I did make contact with his landlord and was able to keep tabs on him. 18 months before he passed th...	DavidG	7	514	Oct 7, 2019 by Temple
	C2C, 10/7 (Preview) The writer on Monday, 10/7, discusses frustration and impatience when change cannot happen quickly. We learn that things cannot happen on the schedule we want. The author says though, that waiting time does not have to be wasted time. Even times of stillness can be a teaching/learning moment....	Lyne	5	1889	Oct 7, 2019 by El
	Hope for Today Oct6 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about choices that we have in our life. How do we know if we are making the right choice? What if we pick the wrong path? The writer describes a feeling of chaos when he/she goes to an alanon mtg. The group mentions a path outside that will lead to a decided and p...	yanksfan51	3	632	Oct 6, 2019 by DavidG
	Help!! (Preview) My adult daughter has relapsed again, and m so worried about her! I woke up a few minutes ago from a terrible nightmare about her, and had a panic attack. She lives about 2,000 miles away, in a different time zone, and I really want to text to see if she is ok, but don't want her fiancé to intercept. should t...	Buckeye Girl	3	2074	Oct 5, 2019 by Iamhere
	ODAT, October 4 (Preview) In today's ODAT reading, members talk about how they handle blaming and finger-pointing directed at them by someone else. One member does not internalize the harsh words or argue with them, but tries to have compassion when someone is lashing out because of their need to unload their own guilt. Ano...	Freetime	4	491	Oct 4, 2019 by Iamhere
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.