Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

confused · confused

I came to the board last night after a week of not feeling well, dragging myself to work and waiting for the next shoe to drop with my A. It was then that I realized just how dumb I was all week. Each night I came home, dinner was ready. Yeah, this is something that I have done for years and years with very few th...

lilleah · lilleah

You know, when I came on tonight, after not being on for awhile, I was upset that my A had gone out without me, when he KNEW I had wanted to go, and he had just offered to take me out tomorrow to appease me. I was taking it very personally. But after reading all these posts, something just hit me, like a ton of br...

hadit · hadit

Hi everyone. Last night I posted on the board about inviting my ex over for dinner and how I was confused as to why I even did it. Your responses were that I love him (which I do), that I miss him (which I do), that I need to do for me first (which I don't). The decision to have him here at what is now MY...

bd · bd

The last time I saw my dad (A) was about 3 weeks ago. They live about 3 hours away. I told them that I was going for this promotion at work (which i didn;t get but thats ok). Anyway I haven't heard from him since. No a good luck when I walked out and not a call to see how things went.&n...

cdb · cdb

Hello friends, The relationship with me and my recoverying alcoholic/drug addicted daughter is going really well now. Being gone from things at home sure helped me alot. I am more relaxed now too. She moved into a house out of town and is renting a room. She can have her dog there and just aquir...

pixel04 · pixel04

Hi, Recently, I have been having trouble letting go of a friend's behavior. We have been through a lot together, much of it good, but lately I have found her behavior to be pretty hurtful. Each morning, I pray for the strength to accept her behavior for what it is and let it go. I don't want to keep bein...

dogscribe · dogscribe

I can't believe it - he got so drunk last night that he was still drunk this morning and actually went to work. Oh my God!!! He really has no clue. We both work at the same company and carpool so at least I drove. He convinced himself that it's all because his neck is bothering him...

marmare · marmare

Day six, I still have not talked to my A. I am so thankful first for the people here on the board. This has been the hardest week for me. People I have known for years always tell me what a strong person I am, but this week I have not felt strong. I have felt lonely, frustrated, tire...

Lani · Lani

Problems are fixed! Thank you, Lani ((((hugs))))

nycbt · nycbt

In my marriage there is close to none at all. In the begin about 6 yrs ago we were doing it alot. But now it like only 2 this year. It was like I got married and now there is no sex. I thought it would be the other way around. The things that have change is that he was doing drugs/drinker heavy when we were first me...

princess433 · princess433

My mom (the alcoholic in my life) has been getting worse latley. She has also been lying alot. I kinda want to just have my grandma tell her that I am not ready to talk to her but then I also wanna tell her that I am mad at her and ask her y. What should I do?? Please help. Love always.. Meg

sooner · sooner

For John and Haxi, I guess it's over now and haxi is gone. I bare no ill will towards either of you. So sorry it had to come to this. I'm sure if there is a next time that all involved (including memebers) will handle things in a different way. I have learned so much from all the view points presented here...

pattyann1963 · pattyann1963

im having problems with working the steps and traditions ,my life seems to a wreck,im going in all sorts diff. diredtions and im comfused,my lifes been like this all my life,now that ive found alanon it seems that ive just got sicker instead of getting better,

kerry5 · kerry5

Happy Thanksgiving! From one pumpkin to another!!!!!!! A woman was asked by a coworker, "What is it like to be a Christian?" The coworker replied, "It is like being a pumpkin. God picks you from the patch, brings you in, and washes all the dirt off of you. Then He cuts off th...

Mars · Mars

that i had a title . my mother and father where both very heavy drinkers to put it mildly . my mother was a volatile and violent woman in private, but a pillar of society in public, did alot of charity work etc, a lady to be feared and admired. i loved her but was scared too. she died at 56 and i was...

captcodee · captcodee

To all my fellow Canucks (and not-so-canucks tee hee).... Have a great long weekend! This is the first long weekend that I am going "home" after getting back together with my Alcoholic husband. And you know, I am so excited! My a...

debilyn · debilyn

I agree with cdb, we all make mistakes or more we all do things out of desperation and then later ask, "why the heck did I do that?" Hax has not made a secret of that fact that he is suffering from depression. This is an illness not unlike any other. I know when I am depressed and desperate I do th...

ednaxray · ednaxray

my mirc works now send me an email..i lost my addy book i will try to mail you some pictures of how to set it up.. dont leave me lani

pattyann1963 · pattyann1963

hello,im needing a sponser been too 15 meetings in alanon,i was raised in alcoholism my dad,my mom was always sober and trying to fix him i moved out of it when i was 16 yrs old and joined job core stayed there for 1 to 2 yrs and came home to marry the dream or love of my life stayed marreied for 16 yrs and 2 kids a...

canadianguy · canadianguy

I have been reading all the recent posts, with a bit of bewilderment, on how easily we can all get off track from our true purpose for being here..... to focus on ourselves, to learn, and to grow. The diversions of the last week make up the "noise" that interrupt our own recoveries.... I ten...

notsonew · notsonew

Hey all, have been watching the boards for a couple of weeks now without posting, appreciate the sharing that let's me know I am not alone. My dad was an alchoholic and managed to get sober when I was about 20. Took a long time to build any sort of relationship and when we did finally...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

There is a divine plan of good at work in my life. I will let go and let it unfold. --Ruth P. Freedman We are never certain of the full importance or the eventual impact of any single event in our lives. But of one thing we can be sure: Each experience offers something valuable to our overall developm...

bd · bd

I was relieved to find this group. I have been suffering in silence for as long as I can remember. The main A in my life was my dad. I was with someone for 13 years but left the marriage for same reasons. I wish I could have a relationship with my dad but it is painful as he is activly...

cindy1359 · cindy1359

I am new to this group. I feel I need help from anyone out there willing to give me advice. I came home today, after working 12 hours, to my husband that was very drunk and angry. I stayed away from him and I was very quiet. He proceeded to yell at me and swear. I asked him please don’t swea...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Depending On Our Higher Power "As recovering addicts, acoas, or codas, we find that we are still dependent, but our dependence has shifted from the things around us to a loving God and the innerstrength we get in our relationship with Him."Basic Text pp.67-68 For many addicts, rebelliousness i...

BlueCloud · BlueCloud

Dear ALL, The other suggestion on this board that has been incredibly helpful to me was the posting about coming up with five solutions to a problem instead of just one solution. This has helped me S-L-O-W D-O-W-N my decision making process and look at alternatives befo...

BlueCloud · BlueCloud

Dear All, Over the past few weeks that I've been reading this message board, I've often read "take care of YOU" and "what are you doing to take care of you?" and "focus on you," but I couldn't quite grasp this concept at first. My first attempts at taking care of myself in relationship with others were m...

Meowzmusic · Meowzmusic

Thank you for your responses and support with my previous post. I am checking on meetings today. I do have one more question. After my husband disappeared for two days drinking, he wanted to come home. He told me he was not happy here and doesn't k...

Lani · Lani

okay....i downloaded mirc and tried to add #alanonachat as it states on the MIP Alanon meeting room. Nothing happens. I know I am blonde...but, this is ridiculous. How does one understand "mirc"...??? LOL

marmare · marmare

I need words of strength today, it has not been a good day. Although I have not heard from my A....my heart is aching and I am an emotional mess. Took the boys to the dentist this morning, one filling turned into a root canal, I know he needed it done but all I could think about was where the hell...

ednaxray · ednaxray

hi john..my mirc is set up by the book..and i have the latest java.. when i try to get in with mirc i get a message that which is like this. Connecting to 216.152.64.151 (7000) - * Unable to connect to server (Connection timed out) - * Connect retry #1 irc.webchat.org (6668) - * Unable to connec...

Angie · Angie

Newbie here, been an alonon member for just a little over a year now. We have a small struggling group, as we are in a remote community in northern Canada. My husband is the active drinker in my life. I was born and raised in the chaos and with the effects of alcohol. Today, I am tired. Its so hard and lonel...

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

Good afternoon everyone! With recent happenings in our group, I had thought of choosing a couple different Traditions to review tonight. But then I took a look at the Tradition we were scheduled to have tonight, and I just had to giggle to myself and think, oh yes HP does know what he/she i...

denver_co · denver_co

Hi everyone I miss my chat room! I haven't been able to log on for 2 days - can't connect to irc.webmaster.com port 6667 - even the java chat here on this site isn't working for me. Anyone else having a similar problem? Thanks! denver_co -- Edited by denver_co at 11:26, 2005-10-06

captcodee · captcodee

I hate posting when I feeling crappy, cause I hate to bring everyone down... could that be a defect? I am always encouraged when other people post their tough times, cause it shows me that I am not alone.... Alone... I am feeling SO alone in this new big city. I have been here for 4 months...

nmike · nmike

Hi everyone, I thought I would post to get some input into my situation with my recovering A. He moved out in June - took a job in another state. Said he didn't want to see me or talk to me for a year. Our last son left for college. We have had some contact for things that involve our boys. At times he says he do...

pixel04 · pixel04

Hi everyone, I've been really kind of struggling in my program for a little while. I began working with a new sponsor in April, and it has been hard for me to open up to her. My schedule has also been turned around quite a bit, so it isn't always possible for me to go to the same meetings I used to. I've bee...

jj · jj

A really good read for any of you interested is the book "From Survival to Recovery" Anyway I went through chapter 8 Living healthier lives. In this chapter was some interesting stuff that makes me think of all of the difficulties I have faced in my recovery. In about half of the cha...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Forgiveness is another word for letting go. --Matthew Fox Learning forgiveness - both granting it to others and accepting it for ourselves - is one of the primary means of a man's spiritual recovery. Many of us, after entering this program, are plagued with strong feelings of guilt. We have fina...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Amends Without Expectations "Projections about actually making amends can be a major obstacle both in making the list and in becoming willing." Basic Text p.38……The Eighth Step asks us to become willing to make amends to all persons we have harmed. As we approach this step, we may wonder what th...

Lani · Lani

Just wondering if our Al-Anon chatroom is down to Java. Does anyone know? Love, Lani

debilyn · debilyn

I am sure you will be checking in here. I hope so! I agree with cdb, we all take a break once in awhile. You know, I know things about you that many others probably don't. You have always been open and shared but there are many new people. I often wonder who it is that protects you from being hurt...

tullemars · tullemars

My A was removed from the home. It was a very hard day but it is done. Now the kids and I can start to recover. I am still aprehensive but I know it was the right move. NO ONE SHOULD LIVE WITH AN ACTIVE ALCOHOLIC. IT IS INSANE I am getting stronger. Hope everyone here does also. Sereni...

chrissy · chrissy

first off i told you if you were going to be an assho_ _ and fall for his lies again i wanted nothing to do with you or him anymore. the only reason i called you that night is because YOUR DAUGHTER needed you,,,,,but i think you are FUC--- UP for choosing him over your daughter and pushing her away for ANYONE....

Kim · Kim

Today was Ok. Went to therapy again.....seems that the days that I don't want to go, I force myself and feel better for it afterward. Therapy is for me...I have to keep telling myself that. My A had said that he wanted to get together for dinner tonight which didn't pan out b/c he was working and then outpa...

hudsond · hudsond

It has been a couple of weeks since I posted. We had the wonderful hurricane Rita come through and everything was done for a week. I am finding it harder and harder to keep everything in perspective! I am so lonely and lost right now--completely overwhelmed! I am new to posting...

Jeannie · Jeannie

Hi, As I have already said in many other posts, my husband is living with his parents, who have always enabled him to the point of treating him with a child. He has been fired form the job he loves. He was fired for drinking, and somehow or another he managed to get his supervisor to put that he was fired fo...

jeeves · jeeves

My A wife was let go last Friday from her job of 15 years. After devoting herself to a full week of drinking and crying, which is probably understandable, now she is fully committed to drinking a bottle before noon then going through rounds of drinking then sleeping, drinking and sleepin...

haximon · haximon

[[[[ room ]]]] It is no longer safe for me to remain in this room, nor do I wish to. I have been asked by ownership and members to leave immediately, permanently, forthwith and all as of midnight eastern tonight. At least they had the decency to let me say goodbye... **From John (aka OP_Pr...

Karilynn · Karilynn

Hello roomies, I'm starting to come back from the dead. The strep is pretty much gone, and the eye is not so pink. Thanks for all your concerns. How nice.

I was making some doctor's appointments this morning when it got me thinking. This is breast cancer awareness month. So for all...

jj · jj

I appologise for not posting much lately. I don't know why but I really don't have much to say. The last time I really posted about my recovery I was in the state of limbo I guess not really feeling anything good or bad about myself and towards my A. At that point I figured it was just fin...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Hope for Today - October 5 I did not choose an alcoholic mother and a workaholic father, who were unable to express love. I did not decide to have an older brother who beat me and a younger brother whose love and attention I craved. I did choose to give my younger brother things I wanted myself in order to wi...

luv123 · luv123

Some thoughts from earlier meeting on changing what we can and letting go of the rest: I am focusing on what is mine to change today and had to do some looking at the stuff i have tried unsuccessfully to change as well i have to come here to maintain my acceptance of those things i cannot chang...

sandy · sandy

Hi Everyone, The two post "Detachment isn't easy" and "Letting go and hope" sure hits home to me also. My husband has drank for years, I to would do and say things (I still do at times) thinking it would make him stop or see what he was doing to himself and his family. Now it's my daughter. ...

luv123 · luv123

this morning s topics were about forgiveness and letting go sharing some thoughts on the meeting: i feel like i need to let go of what i cannot change to my hp 2day i wish i could change my older son's addiction it makes me very sad to c him on that path that is...

gardengal · gardengal

As for the alcoholic, I could not separate from him, leave him, or even leave him alone, Wasnt it my right , my duty my obligation to stay by him, direct him, and guide him (otherwise known as trying to control to him?). Certainly "society not only condoned such efforts, I was sure "they " expected them of...

haximon · haximon

[[ room ]] these tears i cry/of joy and pain/do fill my eye/with clear, salt rain some want me out/of this room soon/i just hope not/twould be no boon i wanted only to be loved/now find myself just pushed and shoved i can't NOT cry/that would be worse/to cry alone is NOT a curse i don't know...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Anxiety is that range of distress, which attends willing what cannot be willed. --Leslie H. Farber There are hundreds of ways in which men try to will things that cannot be willed. We will to sleep; we will to have others like us; we will to have sexual virility. In all these things, the force of our wil...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

The reason why birds can fly and we can't is simply that they have perfect faith, for to have faith is to have wings. --James M. Barrie As children, we are taught to act and think with confidence. If we have faith that something wonderful can happen, it will bring us joy. Confidence gives us the will to s...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Roomies, Well this is a response to my previous post "Oh that lovely gossip". This morning when I got to work my boss was there and neither one of the three I needed to talk to was there. So I went to him, I honestly was afraid that I would chicken out. I told him what happened and what my plan was, he agree...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	gratitude/one day at a time (Preview) I came to the board last night after a week of not feeling well, dragging myself to work and waiting for the next shoe to drop with my A. It was then that I realized just how dumb I was all week. Each night I came home, dinner was ready. Yeah, this is something that I have done for years and years with very few th...	confused	4	762	Oct 8, 2005 by notsonew1111
	Thank you (Preview) You know, when I came on tonight, after not being on for awhile, I was upset that my A had gone out without me, when he KNEW I had wanted to go, and he had just offered to take me out tomorrow to appease me. I was taking it very personally. But after reading all these posts, something just hit me, like a ton of br...	lilleah	4	591	Oct 8, 2005 by Maria123
	Finally, I did something for me (Preview) Hi everyone. Last night I posted on the board about inviting my ex over for dinner and how I was confused as to why I even did it. Your responses were that I love him (which I do), that I miss him (which I do), that I need to do for me first (which I don't). The decision to have him here at what is now MY...	hadit	8	802	Oct 8, 2005 by Maria123
	Disappointed (Preview) The last time I saw my dad (A) was about 3 weeks ago. They live about 3 hours away. I told them that I was going for this promotion at work (which i didn;t get but thats ok). Anyway I haven't heard from him since. No a good luck when I walked out and not a call to see how things went.&n...	bd	8	930	Oct 8, 2005 by Kim
	Update on daughter and me :) (Preview) Hello friends, The relationship with me and my recoverying alcoholic/drug addicted daughter is going really well now. Being gone from things at home sure helped me alot. I am more relaxed now too. She moved into a house out of town and is renting a room. She can have her dog there and just aquir...	cdb	5	603	Oct 8, 2005 by david62
	Letting Go (Preview) Hi, Recently, I have been having trouble letting go of a friend's behavior. We have been through a lot together, much of it good, but lately I have found her behavior to be pretty hurtful. Each morning, I pray for the strength to accept her behavior for what it is and let it go. I don't want to keep bein...	pixel04	2	658	Oct 8, 2005 by bob6502
	I can't believe it (Preview) I can't believe it - he got so drunk last night that he was still drunk this morning and actually went to work. Oh my God!!! He really has no clue. We both work at the same company and carpool so at least I drove. He convinced himself that it's all because his neck is bothering him...	dogscribe	10	764	Oct 8, 2005 by KathyS
	Thankful (Preview) Day six, I still have not talked to my A. I am so thankful first for the people here on the board. This has been the hardest week for me. People I have known for years always tell me what a strong person I am, but this week I have not felt strong. I have felt lonely, frustrated, tire...	marmare	5	594	Oct 8, 2005 by Tammy
	Thank you! (Preview) Problems are fixed! Thank you, Lani ((((hugs))))	Lani	0	477	Oct 8, 2005 by Lani
	No Sex (Preview) In my marriage there is close to none at all. In the begin about 6 yrs ago we were doing it alot. But now it like only 2 this year. It was like I got married and now there is no sex. I thought it would be the other way around. The things that have change is that he was doing drugs/drinker heavy when we were first me...	nycbt	6	739	Oct 8, 2005 by lin0606
	I have a very hard decision to make... (Preview) My mom (the alcoholic in my life) has been getting worse latley. She has also been lying alot. I kinda want to just have my grandma tell her that I am not ready to talk to her but then I also wanna tell her that I am mad at her and ask her y. What should I do?? Please help. Love always.. Meg	princess433	4	584	Oct 8, 2005 by roygbiv
	Haximon & John (Preview) For John and Haxi, I guess it's over now and haxi is gone. I bare no ill will towards either of you. So sorry it had to come to this. I'm sure if there is a next time that all involved (including memebers) will handle things in a different way. I have learned so much from all the view points presented here...	sooner	5	1420	Oct 8, 2005 by roygbiv
	confused (Preview) im having problems with working the steps and traditions ,my life seems to a wreck,im going in all sorts diff. diredtions and im comfused,my lifes been like this all my life,now that ive found alanon it seems that ive just got sicker instead of getting better,	pattyann1963	6	616	Oct 8, 2005 by roygbiv
	Happy ThanksGiving Canada (Preview) Happy Thanksgiving! From one pumpkin to another!!!!!!! A woman was asked by a coworker, "What is it like to be a Christian?" The coworker replied, "It is like being a pumpkin. God picks you from the patch, brings you in, and washes all the dirt off of you. Then He cuts off th...	kerry5	3	554	Oct 8, 2005 by Karilynn
	i did `nt know (Preview) that i had a title . my mother and father where both very heavy drinkers to put it mildly . my mother was a volatile and violent woman in private, but a pillar of society in public, did alot of charity work etc, a lady to be feared and admired. i loved her but was scared too. she died at 56 and i was...	Mars	2	562	Oct 8, 2005 by cdb
	Happy Canadian Long Weekend!!! (Preview) To all my fellow Canucks (and not-so-canucks tee hee).... Have a great long weekend! This is the first long weekend that I am going "home" after getting back together with my Alcoholic husband. And you know, I am so excited! My a...	captcodee	3	575	Oct 8, 2005 by Karilynn
	My thoughts (Preview) I agree with cdb, we all make mistakes or more we all do things out of desperation and then later ask, "why the heck did I do that?" Hax has not made a secret of that fact that he is suffering from depression. This is an illness not unlike any other. I know when I am depressed and desperate I do th...	debilyn	0	558	Oct 7, 2005 by debilyn
	hey lani no byebye (Preview) my mirc works now send me an email..i lost my addy book i will try to mail you some pictures of how to set it up.. dont leave me lani	ednaxray	0	567	Oct 7, 2005 by ednaxray
	sponser (Preview) hello,im needing a sponser been too 15 meetings in alanon,i was raised in alcoholism my dad,my mom was always sober and trying to fix him i moved out of it when i was 16 yrs old and joined job core stayed there for 1 to 2 yrs and came home to marry the dream or love of my life stayed marreied for 16 yrs and 2 kids a...	pattyann1963	5	796	Oct 7, 2005 by pattyann1963
	Back to our reason for being here... (Preview) I have been reading all the recent posts, with a bit of bewilderment, on how easily we can all get off track from our true purpose for being here..... to focus on ourselves, to learn, and to grow. The diversions of the last week make up the "noise" that interrupt our own recoveries.... I ten...	canadianguy	1	655	Oct 7, 2005 by captcodee
	Been there done that... (Preview) Hey all, have been watching the boards for a couple of weeks now without posting, appreciate the sharing that let's me know I am not alone. My dad was an alchoholic and managed to get sober when I was about 20. Took a long time to build any sort of relationship and when we did finally...	notsonew	6	652	Oct 7, 2005 by kitty
	i am a dandelion (Preview) *There is a divine plan of good at work in my life. I will let go and let it unfold. --Ruth P. Freedman* We are never certain of the full importance or the eventual impact of any single event in our lives. But of one thing we can be sure: Each experience offers something valuable to our overall developm...	rosie light shines	2	767	Oct 7, 2005 by kitty
	Hi I'm New (Preview) I was relieved to find this group. I have been suffering in silence for as long as I can remember. The main A in my life was my dad. I was with someone for 13 years but left the marriage for same reasons. I wish I could have a relationship with my dad but it is painful as he is activly...	bd	11	740	Oct 7, 2005 by notsonew
	I Need advice (Preview) I am new to this group. I feel I need help from anyone out there willing to give me advice. I came home today, after working 12 hours, to my husband that was very drunk and angry. I stayed away from him and I was very quiet. He proceeded to yell at me and swear. I asked him please don’t swea...	cindy1359	8	629	Oct 7, 2005 by bd
	STEP 3--depending on my HP (Preview) Depending On Our Higher Power "As recovering addicts, acoas, or codas, we find that we are still dependent, but our dependence has shifted from the things around us to a loving God and the innerstrength we get in our relationship with Him."Basic Text pp.67-68 For many addicts, rebelliousness i...	rosie light shines	1	640	Oct 7, 2005 by cdb
	HOPEFUL II (Preview) Dear ALL, The other suggestion on this board that has been incredibly helpful to me was the posting about coming up with five solutions to a problem instead of just one solution. This has helped me S-L-O-W D-O-W-N my decision making process and look at alternatives befo...	BlueCloud	2	589	Oct 7, 2005 by captcodee
	HOPEFUL (Preview) Dear All, Over the past few weeks that I've been reading this message board, I've often read "take care of YOU" and "what are you doing to take care of you?" and "focus on you," but I couldn't quite grasp this concept at first. My first attempts at taking care of myself in relationship with others were m...	BlueCloud	2	591	Oct 7, 2005 by Jeannie
	One More Question (Preview) Thank you for your responses and support with my previous post. I am checking on meetings today. I do have one more question. After my husband disappeared for two days drinking, he wanted to come home. He told me he was not happy here and doesn't k...	Meowzmusic	8	805	Oct 7, 2005 by Ratchie
	mirc help wanted (Preview) okay....i downloaded mirc and tried to add #alanonachat as it states on the MIP Alanon meeting room. Nothing happens. I know I am blonde...but, this is ridiculous. How does one understand "mirc"...??? LOL	Lani	10	786	Oct 7, 2005 by Lani
	Not Good (Preview) I need words of strength today, it has not been a good day. Although I have not heard from my A....my heart is aching and I am an emotional mess. Took the boys to the dentist this morning, one filling turned into a root canal, I know he needed it done but all I could think about was where the hell...	marmare	6	678	Oct 6, 2005 by leo
	john..?? (Preview) hi john..my mirc is set up by the book..and i have the latest java.. when i try to get in with mirc i get a message that which is like this. Connecting to 216.152.64.151 (7000) - * Unable to connect to server (Connection timed out) - * Connect retry #1 irc.webchat.org (6668) - * Unable to connec...	ednaxray	2	605	Oct 6, 2005 by John
	I'm so tired.... (Preview) Newbie here, been an alonon member for just a little over a year now. We have a small struggling group, as we are in a remote community in northern Canada. My husband is the active drinker in my life. I was born and raised in the chaos and with the effects of alcohol. Today, I am tired. Its so hard and lonel...	Angie	8	773	Oct 6, 2005 by bd
	HP's work? Tradition Seven meeting tonight (Preview) Good afternoon everyone! With recent happenings in our group, I had thought of choosing a couple different Traditions to review tonight. But then I took a look at the Tradition we were scheduled to have tonight, and I just had to giggle to myself and think, oh yes HP does know what he/she i...	kismetstrand	3	1096	Oct 6, 2005 by ednaxray
	chat rooms down? (Preview) Hi everyone I miss my chat room! I haven't been able to log on for 2 days - can't connect to irc.webmaster.com port 6667 - even the java chat here on this site isn't working for me. Anyone else having a similar problem? Thanks! denver_co -- Edited by denver_co at 11:26, 2005-10-06	denver_co	5	595	Oct 6, 2005 by megan
	I am SO LOST!! (Preview) I hate posting when I feeling crappy, cause I hate to bring everyone down... could that be a defect? I am always encouraged when other people post their tough times, cause it shows me that I am not alone.... Alone... I am feeling SO alone in this new big city. I have been here for 4 months...	captcodee	8	601	Oct 6, 2005 by pixel04
	My next move? (Preview) Hi everyone, I thought I would post to get some input into my situation with my recovering A. He moved out in June - took a job in another state. Said he didn't want to see me or talk to me for a year. Our last son left for college. We have had some contact for things that involve our boys. At times he says he do...	nmike	3	687	Oct 6, 2005 by Jill
	perspective (Preview) Hi everyone, I've been really kind of struggling in my program for a little while. I began working with a new sponsor in April, and it has been hard for me to open up to her. My schedule has also been turned around quite a bit, so it isn't always possible for me to go to the same meetings I used to. I've bee...	pixel04	3	622	Oct 6, 2005 by kismetstrand
	From Survival to Recovery (Preview) A really good read for any of you interested is the book "From Survival to Recovery" Anyway I went through chapter 8 Living healthier lives. In this chapter was some interesting stuff that makes me think of all of the difficulties I have faced in my recovery. In about half of the cha...	jj	3	559	Oct 6, 2005 by pixel04
	forgiveness is just a word for *letting go (Preview) Forgiveness is another word for letting go. *--Matthew Fox* Learning forgiveness - both granting it to others and accepting it for ourselves - is one of the primary means of a man's spiritual recovery. Many of us, after entering this program, are plagued with strong feelings of guilt. We have fina...	rosie light shines	1	719	Oct 6, 2005 by kitty
	amends WITHOUT expectations (Preview) Amends Without Expectations "Projections about actually making amends can be a major obstacle both in making the list and in becoming willing." Basic Text p.38……The Eighth Step asks us to become willing to make amends to all persons we have harmed. As we approach this step, we may wonder what th...	rosie light shines	0	471	Oct 6, 2005 by rosie light shines
	Question to anyone? (Preview) Just wondering if our Al-Anon chatroom is down to Java. Does anyone know? Love, Lani	Lani	4	522	Oct 6, 2005 by Lani
	Hi haxi (Preview) I am sure you will be checking in here. I hope so! I agree with cdb, we all take a break once in awhile. You know, I know things about you that many others probably don't. You have always been open and shared but there are many new people. I often wonder who it is that protects you from being hurt...	debilyn	0	588	Oct 6, 2005 by debilyn
	Full Steam ahead part III (Preview) My A was removed from the home. It was a very hard day but it is done. Now the kids and I can start to recover. I am still aprehensive but I know it was the right move. NO ONE SHOULD LIVE WITH AN ACTIVE ALCOHOLIC. IT IS INSANE I am getting stronger. Hope everyone here does also. Sereni...	tullemars	1	538	Oct 6, 2005 by nmike
	this is an email from someone who i thought was my best friend (Preview) first off i told you if you were going to be an assho_ _ and fall for his lies again i wanted nothing to do with you or him anymore. the only reason i called you that night is because YOUR DAUGHTER needed you,,,,,but i think you are FUC--- UP for choosing him over your daughter and pushing her away for ANYONE....	chrissy	7	720	Oct 6, 2005 by Emmie11
	trying to keep the focus (Preview) Today was Ok. Went to therapy again.....seems that the days that I don't want to go, I force myself and feel better for it afterward. Therapy is for me...I have to keep telling myself that. My A had said that he wanted to get together for dinner tonight which didn't pan out b/c he was working and then outpa...	Kim	2	515	Oct 6, 2005 by Faith73
	I just want everything to be normal (Preview) It has been a couple of weeks since I posted. We had the wonderful hurricane Rita come through and everything was done for a week. I am finding it harder and harder to keep everything in perspective! I am so lonely and lost right now--completely overwhelmed! I am new to posting...	hudsond	6	613	Oct 6, 2005 by WakingUp
	Tied myself to a chair (Preview) Hi, As I have already said in many other posts, my husband is living with his parents, who have always enabled him to the point of treating him with a child. He has been fired form the job he loves. He was fired for drinking, and somehow or another he managed to get his supervisor to put that he was fired fo...	Jeannie	7	622	Oct 6, 2005 by WakingUp
	Please Help. (Preview) My A wife was let go last Friday from her job of 15 years. After devoting herself to a full week of drinking and crying, which is probably understandable, now she is fully committed to drinking a bottle before noon then going through rounds of drinking then sleeping, drinking and sleepin...	jeeves	8	652	Oct 6, 2005 by jeeves
	Haxi's Farewell Post (closed) (Preview) *[[[[ room ]]]]* *It is no longer safe for me to remain in this room, nor do I wish to.* I have been asked by ownership and members to leave immediately, permanently, forthwith and all as of midnight eastern tonight. At least they had the decency to let me say goodbye... **From John (aka OP_Pr...	haximon	9	1192	Oct 5, 2005 by Anew123
	A healthy reminder (Preview) Hello roomies, I'm starting to come back from the dead. The strep is pretty much gone, and the eye is not so pink. Thanks for all your concerns. How nice. I was making some doctor's appointments this morning when it got me thinking. This is breast cancer awareness month. So for all...	Karilynn	2	579	Oct 5, 2005 by Kim
	Not posting much lately (Preview) I appologise for not posting much lately. I don't know why but I really don't have much to say. The last time I really posted about my recovery I was in the state of limbo I guess not really feeling anything good or bad about myself and towards my A. At that point I figured it was just fin...	jj	3	741	Oct 5, 2005 by cdb
	what a diference 20 months can make!!! (Preview) Hope for Today - October 5 I did not choose an alcoholic mother and a workaholic father, who were unable to express love. I did not decide to have an older brother who beat me and a younger brother whose love and attention I craved. I did choose to give my younger brother things I wanted myself in order to wi...	rosie light shines	0	464	Oct 5, 2005 by rosie light shines
	changing only what i can & feeling (Preview) Some thoughts from earlier meeting on changing what we can and letting go of the rest: I am focusing on what is mine to change today and had to do some looking at the stuff i have tried unsuccessfully to change as well i have to come here to maintain my acceptance of those things i cannot chang...	luv123	2	1048	Oct 5, 2005 by captcodee
	Am I doing the right thing? (Preview) Hi Everyone, The two post "Detachment isn't easy" and "Letting go and hope" sure hits home to me also. My husband has drank for years, I to would do and say things (I still do at times) thinking it would make him stop or see what he was doing to himself and his family. Now it's my daughter. ...	sandy	2	536	Oct 5, 2005 by nmike
	letting go and hope (Preview) this morning s topics were about forgiveness and letting go sharing some thoughts on the meeting: i feel like i need to let go of what i cannot change to my hp 2day i wish i could change my older son's addiction it makes me very sad to c him on that path that is...	luv123	2	626	Oct 5, 2005 by luv123
	DETACHMENT ISNT EASY.... (Preview) As for the alcoholic, I could not separate from him, leave him, or even leave him alone, Wasnt it my right , my duty my obligation to stay by him, direct him, and guide him (otherwise known as trying to control to him?). Certainly "society not only condoned such efforts, I was sure "they " expected them of...	gardengal	6	1330	Oct 5, 2005 by sg
	tears rant (Preview) [[ room ]] these tears i cry/of joy and pain/do fill my eye/with clear, salt rain some want me out/of this room soon/i just hope not/twould be no boon i wanted only to be loved/now find myself just pushed and shoved i can't NOT cry/that would be worse/to cry alone is NOT a curse i don't know...	haximon	6	747	Oct 5, 2005 by david62
	i cannot force life (Preview) Anxiety is that range of distress, which attends willing what cannot be willed. *--Leslie H. Farber* There are hundreds of ways in which men try to will things that cannot be willed. We will to sleep; we will to have others like us; we will to have sexual virility. In all these things, the force of our wil...	rosie light shines	1	476	Oct 5, 2005 by cdb
	that thing called faith (Preview) The reason why birds can fly and we can't is simply that they have perfect faith, for to have faith is to have wings. *--James M. Barrie* As children, we are taught to act and think with confidence. If we have faith that something wonderful can happen, it will bring us joy. Confidence gives us the will to s...	rosie light shines	1	601	Oct 5, 2005 by cdb
	RE: Oh that lovely gossip (Preview) Roomies, Well this is a response to my previous post "Oh that lovely gossip". This morning when I got to work my boss was there and neither one of the three I needed to talk to was there. So I went to him, I honestly was afraid that I would chicken out. I told him what happened and what my plan was, he agree...	Dolphin123	3	862	Oct 5, 2005 by cdb
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.