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2 bad days
(Preview)
Well I let her know she can't stay and drink anymore.
Now off to the legal stuff.
my family has been torn in half.
I am so tired.
I have had enough pain.
But i still have more to go.
there are times that you have to endure the pain.
But I will be stronger later on.
character flaws
being a car...
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tullemars
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4
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461
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being more flexible
(Preview)
The man who never alters his opinion is like standing water, and breeds reptiles of the mind. -- William Blake
We seek the answer. Sometimes we think we have found a central truth and later learn that beneath it is another truth. Or what seemed so crucial as a guiding principle for our lives last y...
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rosie light shines
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1
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409
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perspective
(Preview)
Perspective
When our vision was clouded by self-will, our perspective was narrow and subjective. We saw people and events only as they fostered or frustrated our egotistical concerns. The world was a frightening place, since we thought that our welfare was entirely dependent on our own effor...
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rosie light shines
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0
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282
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FEEL EMPTY
(Preview)
I feel very empty inside. I put my guard down and then something happens. I don't know what to do any more. I am at a stop right now that my trust is no more. I love my husband and I guess at this time I am not ready to leave. But it is hard to let my guard down knowing that he is going to turn around an take my car with...
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nycbt
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5
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469
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For Kathy S
(Preview)
Thank you Kathy, it did make me sit and think.
Calling his phone and leaving a message and calling again does make it look obsessive. He has dropped his phone over 5 times and sometimes tells me that he doesn't get voice mail, or that his phone doesn't ring at times, I have seen him turn it o...
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marmare
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1
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438
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Hey everybody
(Preview)
Well I just wanted to see how everyone was doing. It's been a week or two since I've posted. Thngs are going great. My "A" is still doing very well with recovery. He has been working very hard and eveything is wonderful. Just wanted to touch base with you all. Tak...
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kimmie
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1
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423
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Feeling strange...
(Preview)
Hi everyone..
Lately I have been feeling really strange. Everything seems to be going good for me, I just made caption of my cheerleading squad, I am doing great in school, and I have the best time that I have ever had with my friends. But I am feeling realy empty.
My mom is a alcoholic and she has just b...
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princess433
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4
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405
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HE CALLED & I RAN LIKE A FOOL
(Preview)
IM HOME NOW,
BUT MY HUSBAND CALLED AT 4:00 AM AND I LEFT MY DAUGHTER UPSTAIRS WITH MY BROTHER DOWN STAIRS AND WENT TO HIM. THE PHONE RANG & I FINALLY FELL ASLEEP HE SAID YEAH HELLO I SAID WHO IS THIS. I IMMEDIATELY WOKE UP WENT TO MEET HIM I BROUGHT HIM CLOTHES SHAVING CREAM TOOHTH...
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chrissy
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8
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886
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p.s.
(Preview)
i just want to add to my previous post that i have really been making a conscious effort to do the things that i know will make me feel better about myself. like i mentioned in an earlier post, doing more volunteer work for the school, applying for this job (which is for being a substitute secretary...
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search41
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4
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460
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really needing objectivity
(Preview)
hello everyone
first, i want to thank those who replied to my last post for all the support and encouragement. man, that helps so much!
funny thing is, what i posted is what i really need help on tonight. the matter of my a expecting me to give him money cuz he gambled and drank it all away...
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search41
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5
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526
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conflict within
(Preview)
Hello roomies:
Today was weird. I have been having a difficult time at work, just keeping it all going and together lately. I come home and go through the motions. I went for another walk today, took care of some bills, did some laundry..the usual. My A had said that he would stop by tonight after his ou...
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Kim
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1
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355
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My birthday
(Preview)
 Tommorow is my birthday. Every year since I was a little kid I got depressed about getting older. But I have decided to make it a special day. I am getting a facial, waxing, manicure. I am also going to have lunch with one of my guy friends.
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nycbt
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8
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336
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the definition of enabling?
(Preview)
Hello ..........hoping someone can define enabling for me ........very confused
I have not given my A any money although last night he took 1 pound from my purse for a can of beer , i let him know that it was missing and he produced it saying he was going to put it back later. Today i'm at work and my A is wal...
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cytagirl
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2
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754
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I think we did the right thing, but my heart still hurts
(Preview)
Some of you may have seen my pasts posts called "My son's little alcholic house guest".
My heart is heavy by the action we had to take about 6 weeks ago. My 27 y/o son is not yet legally divorced but brought home his new girl friend under false pretenses, claiming he'd found "true love" and...
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mizcathi
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1
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515
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Wrote in another post and just wanted to share.....
(Preview)
Ya know the pain that Alcoholics go through? The same pain that we go through....... They feel neglected, lonely and out of control with their emotions so they drink because they don't know any other way to handle life.
Well, the same is true with us who lose control over our emotions dealiing with...
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sanddie
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0
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378
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I know what has to be done
(Preview)
I let my A know I want her to leave.
She is in treatment now and has been for a couple years on and off.
We have kids and it is tough.
I was hoping for her to get an inpatient.
She was at it again last night and could not get out of bed to get the kids on the bus.
I feel nervous about it but, letting h...
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tullemars
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2
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451
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Jeannies bunch
(Preview)
Hi,
I talk about my kids so often, and the people here on this site helped me keep my sanity when I was pregnant with my youngest, Conner.
With everything I have had to go through, not a day goes by that I do not thank God for my wonderful children. I am truly blessed to share in their lives, and I learn fro...
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Jeannie
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7
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377
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Feel like a fool
(Preview)
Hello Again , In my last post i mentioned that i was to attend my first meeting yesterday , unfortunately i couldn't get there , and boy do i wish i'd managed after the day i've had .My A who had managed not to drink for a week , mainly because i stopped enabling him, asked for 1 pound to get a coca cola , silly me...
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cytagirl
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11
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550
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haxigonian XXX
(Preview)
[[ room ]]
It's been a strange day already today.
The fog was very thick this morning; the train ride to over the river to downtown was just plain creeeee-py! I hope Halloween night is like that.
People had been telling me about Stumptown Coffee so I went there. Of course I got off at the...
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haximon
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2
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515
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Oblivion
(Preview)
I am beginning to think that I speak and no words come out anymore. For the past month to month or two I have tried to tell my A. (who has been dry for about 6 weeks) that I am having difficulties w/our marriage. Lack of communication between us. Him shutting down conversations. I'm not comfortable expres...
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sg
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7
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355
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I am not going to live this any longer.
(Preview)
I am not going to be manipulated anymore.
I am not fighting for someone who is too sick to love me.
I am tired.
I will not allow my house to be disease ridden.
I am done.
I am ready for the next stage.
I am getting healthier.
I am going to take care of me. Forget the rest
To all take care o...
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tullemars
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4
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576
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I just don't understand
(Preview)
My A is working 4-10's this week, nights even. I was so excited about relaxing evenings (inbetween sleeping and his regular job he is doing a side job with a friend re-roofing a house) I got busy Monday night painting my toe nails and being the Queen of the Remote. Tuesday aft...
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marmare
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6
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753
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Day 13 of living away from my A
(Preview)
Today is day 13 of living away from my husband the alcoholic and I wanted to update everyone on where I am today. I also once again need guidance..
I have been living with my children in a condo on the beach for the last 13 days. I left my home because my husband wouldnt. Now w...
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Tammy
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3
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522
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how very strange
(Preview)
I am confused over what I'm actually feeling over a small event involving my husband. As many of you know he moved out in May, has gotten his own apartment, filed for divorce and has continued to use...even when he has the kids with him. He likes to take tranquilizers of what ever flav...
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swolves
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3
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482
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another step in the right direction/trust
(Preview)
hello roomies:
well today I went back to therapy. It was the first step in the right direction for me. Next week my goal is to get ot a f2f meeting, I have been using what I knew from when I did attend up until now. The argument with my friend has left with little to do at night...I spent a large portio...
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Kim
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4
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531
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i found him
(Preview)
i was calling all over hotels for my a and at 4:00pm i located him at a hotel. i called and they put me through i think the hotel was ready to kill me. i called every day until i found him a couple times a day. he answered the phone trashed i said hello , he said hello i said who is this he said his name and then i said...
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chrissy
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3
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449
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HE IS STILL NOT HOME SINCE SAT
(Preview)
HE IS STILL NOT HOME SINCE SAT SHOULD I FILE A MISSING PERSON. I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO I AM SO TIRED AND LOST. .HE DRAINED THE BANK ACCOUNT THE BANK CALLED TO SEE IF HIS CARD WAS STOLEN -- Edited by chrissy at 21:54, 2005-09-27
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chrissy
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12
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606
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Be gentle with yourself
(Preview)
He something from the book "Getting Them Sober you can help" Volume One written by Toby Rice Drews.
Here is something from Chapter 2
Be Gentle with Yourself
It's hard to do anything right during a crisis. And crises happen very regularly in an alcholic's home. When things are going well for a few...
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nycbt
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1
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598
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I feel finally feel like I am starting to let go
(Preview)
I have been home now for two weeks and I returned home to empty promises which I know is my own fault. After all, nothing changes if nothing changes. The honeymoon period has already ended and I have watched my husband rant and rave on a couple of occasions about whatever injustice he seems to thin...
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JulieLynn
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2
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453
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Angry
(Preview)
Yesterday night wasn't that good. Well my husband said he was going to Quick Check and then when his boss called I went out side and there was no car. He had taken my car without saying he was going to take it. I was upset with him. His boss came to pick him up because he said he would be back. I was...
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nycbt
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1
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433
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Quote to share
(Preview)
" I may not be where I want to be, but I'm sure as heck not where I was!" Wynonna Judd
She is going through her own difficulties in life and said this on Oprah yesterday and it just grabbed at me!!
Her thought for the day deffinately applies to all of us.
When we are not feeling quite as good about our rec...
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jj
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3
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357
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An update from the long lost CAPTCODEE
(Preview)
  Hey all. I have been such a delinquent (how the heck do you spell that anyhow). Since I have moved back with the hubby, and into the big city, I have been so bad. I don't think I have posted once since I have lived in Calgary! What kind of example is that.
So, j...
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captcodee
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3
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424
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mental health answering machine
(Preview)
Answering Machine at the Mental Hospital: "Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline. If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you or offer to press 2 for them. If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5, and 6. If you...
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rosie light shines
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2
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411
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my first post
(Preview)
Hi Everyone,
I am not sure if I am doing this right but here goes. I found this website last night and just wanted to say thankyou to everyone who has already posted. Just reading the messages has helped me enormously. I have contacted a counsellor today for me to heal and find out obstacles that lay a...
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leo
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14
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615
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The disease/the human person
(Preview)
hi, just thought i would say how i see the separation of the disease and the loved one.
I use the analogy that if he had a brain tumor that made his behavior not something
very loveable, I would still love him.
My mother was the best to me. She got a tiny bit impatient when she was so bad
with the b...
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debilyn
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6
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452
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Scared to ask for a sponcer
(Preview)
I love this board! I have been going to f2f meetings for about 6 weeks and I know that I need a sponcer but I feel some weird shame and fear and so much resistance from myself...like I don't deserve one or someone will say yes but not want to...i am very reluctant to ask and I find it almost impossible to make p...
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Maypole
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7
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658
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Sunday night chair needed
(Preview)
Hello OP's
Could someone please chair the Sunday evening 7pm meeting for me?
I leave for the Netherlands tomorrow to visit my brother and his family and will be unable to chair.
Thank-you so very much
Megan
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megan
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0
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411
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Lou
(Preview)
Yes, I did know my husband for three years before we married, and yes, he did neglect to tell me that he was a recovering alcoholic. I think your word, "recovered" is a word I do not use. He lived in England you see, so our f2f meetings were not on a daily basis. We would see one another every three or four mont...
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Diva
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2
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599
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I did something for ME last night
(Preview)
Last night I went to a rubber stamping party. I can't tell you how good it felt. I really was hesitant about going because Tues. especially are one of the A's drinking nights. He of course stopped at the bar after work and he knew I was going to this and that I had to leave early. So I just starting dinner - gri...
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dogscribe
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9
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453
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just a poem.....
(Preview)
this is a poem i wrote one day, when i was trying to understand my how alcoholics think and react......not sure how true it is.
I AM Sober
This is how I see the alcoholic
CONSUMED, LIQUID HELL
MY MIND SATURATED…EMPTY
...
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debi
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0
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311
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A Lesson in Change
(Preview)
Found this in my email today - just wanted to share.
A Lesson in Change It took a major health scare for me to learn that I needed to start paying attention to my life. By Alan Alda I was in an ambulance, bumping down a mountain road for an hour and a half. Someone on a gurney was moaning at the top of his voice...
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kismetstrand
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4
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429
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My work
(Preview)
Hi Rommies,
I just need to get some stuff off my chest about work. I took off some time from work. (since July 4th) I was fighting with my boss and told his boss about his inablilty to manage many times. Which I'm sure got back to him. Well I asked for some time off at the begining of the summer. Well now I w...
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nikkilou
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4
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470
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Anyone heard this before??
(Preview)
Hey all
I went to a new f2f last week just to see what it would be like. Well I heard two things that were pretty cool to me.
1. A woman said that she had a God Box. And some of you probably know what this is but for those of you that don't. A God Box as she explained it is wher...
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browneyes
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5
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532
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hp's still working
(Preview)
well, i guess whether people are interested in what i share or not, i'm going to keep sharing, cuz it's helping. my a just got done with ANOTHER one of his weeks of 5 weeks of vacation a year, and i have been AMAZED at how i have not engaged in the things he does when he is on vacation. usua...
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search41
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4
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326
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Life in Sobriety (ROFLMAO)
(Preview)
Pardon my Humor here, [I am a mischievious alanoner!] My now sober spouse of 9 months thought I 'HAD' to say 'goodbye' to him, before I came to town.
(hello, like does he ever say 'bye' to me when he scrambles to town for coffeeshop?)
Anyway, I smile, grinned, and " Saluted!"
He just smiled bac...
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wallsal55
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1
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351
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my best friends!! steps 1-2 and 3
(Preview)
Basic Text, p.92
As using addicts, despair was our relentless companion. It colored our every waking moment. Despair was born of our experience in active addiction: No matter what measures we tried to make our lives better, we slid ever deeper into misery. Attempts we made to control our lives fre...
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rosie light shines
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1
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432
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Quote for Today
(Preview)
xxxxxxxxxx If God has a Hand in it, Then That's Love [italic]/i]
Are there not two points in the adventure of the diver? One...when a beggar, he prepares to plunge? Two--when a prince he ri...
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wallsal55
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0
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306
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Childhood baggage
(Preview)
"Hope for Today"...Sept 26th reading
"My husband was not the sole cause of our troubles. I had been denying that my illness was deeply affecting our marriage."
"If I am experiencing difficulty in a relationshiop, the root cause may be in my alcoholic upbringing. Once I find that ro...
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sg
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2
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341
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living with my God within
(Preview)
A.A. Thought for the Day
Continuing the consideration of the term spiritual experience: "What often takes place in a few months could seldom have been accomplished by years of self discipline. With few exceptions, our members find that they have tapped an unsuspected inner resource which they p...
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rosie light shines
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0
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263
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Panicky
(Preview)
Today I am panicky over things - some I am powerless over.
1. I have to move Oct. 31 & there is no 1 bed. apt. available to date - esp. w/ hurricane vics moving in. I have to have 1st floor & other needs since I'm disabled. If I don't move, my rent will increase by $300 per month. I've been calling - turning thi...
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cedarpines
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2
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300
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love me or leave me....i am gonna be me!!!
(Preview)
Love me or leave me…but it will be AS I AM!!!!!
What I have wanted is consistency, ever since the day back in Wyncote when my mom and dad split. I have wanted to be liked. I have wanted to be loved. I have wanted to be in a family-type atmosphere. --Reggie Jackson
How many of us gave ourselves away...
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rosie light shines
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1
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512
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slipped again
(Preview)
Hello all:
Well, as you know yesterday was my birthday. My A had been calling for a week about our anniversary and my birthday to see me. I passed on our anniversary. After this weekend and his being there for me, I gave in on my birthday. I was having a horrible day all day, and he called several times to s...
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Kim
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3
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383
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need support....i slipped
(Preview)
sept 27, 2005
NEED SUPPORT_big slip
i have been playing my affirmation tapes for 36 days now, trying to be able to love and accept me as i am...not demanding perfection out of me...but to love me as i am....well i thought i was making huge progress, lately........than the big test
las...
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rosie light shines
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5
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367
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Looking back on early recovery
(Preview)
Had an interesting session with my therapist last night, the guy my ex and I stopped going to a year ago. Talking to him about what happened between my wife and I these past couple of years, something became clear to me. We were talking about what I was or wasn’t doing to meet my wife’s expe...
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UncleLou
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7
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526
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M-I-L put things into perspective
(Preview)
My mother-in-law put things into perspective for me. I interviewed at Wal-mart yesterday and was not crazy about the idea of a job there because it was a pay cut of almost $4.00 per hour. I guess I somehow felt it was beneath what I was capable of. I was trying to hold off for one of the m...
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Powerless
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2
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382
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"right back up" or trying to
(Preview)
September 27 Right Back Up
"There is something in our self-destructive personalities that cries for failure."
Basic Text, p.77
######ROSIE…I am sharing on this NA share because no matter what the group??? It is still 12 steps and still recovery…..
"Poor me;...
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rosie light shines
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0
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279
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how can i get his car out of my name
(Preview)
our two cars are in my name and i want to get his out of my name and to get the plates and turn them in. otherwise tickets and trouble will come to me and i cant afford any more problems in my life right now. my family said report the car stolen but i dont want him to get any trouble. he has enough pro...
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chrissy
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6
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419
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Sponsor Advice Needed!
(Preview)
I am doing a lot better these days. Working on doing things for me (and my kids) not my A. I have started going to 2 f2f meetings a week ....not sure if i will be able to keep this up since i need someone to watch our foster child when I'm away! I'm going to kep trying though! I have set a few boundries and am stick...
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sandie123
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2
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370
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Can it be so simple,,,to,,,,"Let it begin with me?:
(Preview)
I can easily itemize my loved ones limitations. Hours pass while I list the ways in which "he" could stand to change.
But not one thing has ever improved as a result of this mental criticism, All it does is keep my mind on someone other than me. Instead of admitting my powerlessness over another person...
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gardengal
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4
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830
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My ex's inappropriate behavior part II
(Preview)
This was my ex's weekend with the kids. (We are both in the same house in seperate bedrooms until it sells) Friday evening, while she's still not home from work, my 14 yr old son has 2 friends over, one from the neighborhood, another driven over by his parents. I leave them at 7:00 to go to an AA meeting. My e...
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UncleLou
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8
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576
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