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haxigonian XXIX
(Preview)
[[ room ]]
I'm sorry for being such a wet blanket this weekend. I now understand what's going on and there is nothin I can do about it. It's called complex grief. The losses have come so fast and there has been so much additional crap that I haven't had the time to grieve em.
Th...
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haximon
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3
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424
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hello again
(Preview)
Hi everyone.
Well, my birthday is today. And the whole weekend a bust. An argument with my friends (one of whom is my best friend) erupted (it is a long story) however, it was my standing up for myself and not accepting unaccpetable behavior that started it however, in the end I also got v...
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Kim
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4
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331
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sharing my path and miracles
(Preview)
HI Ya'll, I have not done a yak in a long time. Been so into reading everyones
shares. What a strong, neat group of people!!
Life sorta settled for a bit. Have been seeing Social Security fall into place and to begin my benefits. I was told by them that my long term would not be offset, that I would
c...
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debilyn
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4
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508
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It is so odd...
(Preview)
It is so odd that I feel more productive now that I am not working than when I was. I have been able to really get the house clean and keep it that way, cook wonderful meals, go to the library, run errands, apply for food stamps, recertify for medicaid for the children and...
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Powerless
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2
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319
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now i found out he is doing drugs too
(Preview)
i am so dumb i cant believe he is doing drugs this guy called my husbands cell phone. i was playing dective and it was his drug dealer he said he just sold my husband 30dollar weed bag.
i didnt even know he was doing drugs too. he said him & this other guy hooked up he said my husband...
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chrissy
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10
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532
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update
(Preview)
For those that have followed my story here's an update.
As most of you know my husband has been seeking sobriety for 6 months. He has mostly failed and has been on very long binges, no work and been pretty unavailable to myself, his family and his small children.
He is sober 18 days now....
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mom to 2
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11
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439
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looking for Frank33 from chat room
(Preview)
I'm looking for Frank33 from the chat room. I talked to him a week ago and really would like to get in touch with him. If anyone sees him please ask him to read this post and send me a message where I can get in touch with him. Or just reply to this and I will send him my message. Thanks.
Sandie123
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sandie123
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0
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290
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Footwork
(Preview)
I have been having such a hard time lately keeping my mind on "one day at a time" worrying about what will I do IF I make the choice to leave the home for awhile. Of course, a gazillion scenarios come creeping into my head and w/three kids and a houseful of animals, I, at times, felt stuck...like I was powerl...
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sg
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2
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369
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Just drop'n in...Stressing Dr. checkups!, Necessary Time Outs!
(Preview)
Hi, Haven't been on Board for a while. Reached a crossroad in recovery where my "inner voice" was screaming at me and so was my soon to be "50" year old bod in November. Took time off from the boards, then skipped my 2 alanon meetings last week. Was able to h...
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wallsal55
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1
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376
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resentment
(Preview)
Hi everyone,
I have been doing so much thinking here lately. I have been brutaly honest with myself, and it does hurt.
I have been on this rollercoaster for so many years. Life has gotten relatively peaceful here lately. My husband is at his parents house, and unless I become willing to accept his d...
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Jeannie
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3
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344
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Should be an interesting session tonight
(Preview)
This morning my ex was looking at my son's wrist which was swollen from a dirt bike accident yesterday. I heard them discussing going to the doctor and asked if I could do anything. My ex got real angry with me and said in front of my son, "I don't want anything from you, I don't want you involved, stay out of...
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UncleLou
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1
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450
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FIRST LOIS WILSON BIOGRAPHY
(Preview)
THE LOIS WILSON STORY - WHEN LOVE IS NOT ENOUGH
Choices Recovery Bookstore will be holding a book signing and Author discussion on:
MONDAY, OCTOBER 3, 2005 at 7:00pm
404 East 87th Street (St. Joseph's Church)
between 1st Ave & York Ave, New York City
THE FIRST BIOGRAPHY OF THE GR...
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napnyc
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0
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349
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New to All This, But Yet Feel At Home!
(Preview)
Hi all. I'm writing my 1st post. Have been to a few internet meetings, which are very helpful. I would just ask for your prayers and support in my situation. I see myself in so many of you. My A of 17 years is packing as I type. We have finally decided to separate aft...
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Ratchie
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6
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385
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well he cleaned the bank out since it was closed & he took the card we now have $32.00
(Preview)
i cant believe he took out more money and left the bank with $32.00 i am so messed up right now. sometimes i feel like this is hell you know i just cant take it how am i going to survive
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chrissy
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9
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604
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its now 7:56 am and he did it again he never came home
(Preview)
i want to hurt him he never came home. i feel numb i only slept a few hours i am so wiped and my daughter has a game at 12. im so hungry my stomache is rumbling thats what woke me up. all i ate yesterday was frosted flakes in the morning. yeah happy 3yr anniversary we were suppo...
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chrissy
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13
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517
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Day 7 of living without my A
(Preview)
Today is day 7 of living without my husband, my a. As many of you know I left my husband last Saturday. I just felt that God wanted me out of the way so that he could get to him. I kept making excuses, pleading and begging for him to quit drinking. It was making me miserabl...
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Tammy
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9
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452
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Daily Reminder
(Preview)
Hi all!
I just read the following in an Alanon phamplet, I thought maybe someone else could benefit from sharing in the reminder. I think it speaks to AA and Alanons a like.
*Accept the fact that there is a problem with alcohol, and that you can learn to deal with it.
*Recogniz...
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Jersey
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2
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418
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Are they really having fun "out there"
(Preview)
Many of us feel that our addicts/alcoholics have it so easy. They have no responsibility, or at least don't take any,and they ae out partying or drinking all of the time. Are they really having fun? They have lucid moments and self doubt and self-loath...
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Powerless
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7
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703
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strugging with reality
(Preview)
Few of us intentionally refused to see the reality of our lives or the circumstances in which we find ourselves. But the the truth is that most of us have indeed done so. In Alanon , we eventually come to see the many ways we had unknowlingly blocked out whole segments of our past and present. W e recognize...
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gardengal
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3
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408
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Another Night Alone
(Preview)
Thanks to everyone who responded to my post last night. It really felt good to know there are people out there everyday who have gone through what I am going through!
Well, another night alone.....While in the shower today (about 11:30 a.m.) I heard "I'll be back in a little bit". How co...
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Audrey
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8
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515
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he came home he said oh i only had 5 beers & 1 shot
(Preview)
thank you for all your kind advice & prayers.
i am so pissed i could scream.he came home late i made dinner for nobody i guess beacause nobody ate. once again i trusted him good old trustable jerk that i am. he was so sick last night and i was happy .he wasnt feeling good i mean praying to the&nb...
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chrissy
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9
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645
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RE: never ends
(Preview)
Thank you all for responding to my post. It means so much to be able to have that support! There is so much that I don't know. The best thing I could have done is find this site.
He's in bed because he stayed out with his friends all night. I'm at the computer bawling. There is something so WRONG about this p...
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Jersey
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6
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679
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The Dilemma of the Alcoholic Marriage
(Preview)
An excerpt from the chapter on "What Manner of Communications are These?...this really struck me. (p.17)
You know that no improvement can be accomplished unless we're consistent. If we haven't the courage to speak up whe the drinker is in a sober phase, he'll just go on believing that t...
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sg
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5
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1024
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First Post..I'm sorry it's long
(Preview)
This is the first time I have posted here. I found this site a while ago and have read many posts but never had the courage to post one of my own. I have been living with an active and partially functional alcoholic up until almost a month ago when we split. My feelings have gone from loneliness to total melt...
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hadit
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5
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448
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roygbiv
(Preview)
I read your response to my post and it meant very much to me. At first, I was disappointed that that you agreed with me about being crazy and out of control. Then I realized you were agreeing with me because it was true and what I needed to hear. What meant the most to me was the fact that you had r...
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Powerless
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5
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362
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First Timer Who Is Feeling Alone
(Preview)
Wow! Tonight is the first time I've started looking for support from people who can understand what I am going through!
I began to read a few posts, and couldn't believe how some of the stories sounded so much like mine.
I am remarried (2nd marriage) for almost 4 years now. I've got thr...
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Audrey
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7
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572
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Feeling trapped and angry - sorry very long
(Preview)
Hi all
I havent posted on here much. Just a little background: My A is my boyfriend. He lives with me, I own the house. He is verbally abusive when hes drunk. And it seems that he is drunk a lot lately. Hes had various surgeries in the past year or so ...
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dogscribe
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12
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572
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taking responsibility now
(Preview)
THIS IS OFF OVEREATERS anonymous, its still 12 steps, and it is great!!!!
Character Defects
Beginning the OA program, we are inclined to feel that our problems and difficulties are largely due to circumstances and other people. The enemy seems to be outside. The more we work the Steps, the mor...
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rosie light shines
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0
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305
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lame lies, TY God
(Preview)
I was holding out, faithfully but why waste any of my precious energy. I've had a fever for a month, my immunities are shot. It is so obvious our A is 'out' again. He says he goes to meetings. He walks around here angry all the time & he can't look at us in the eye... &nb...
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kitty
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4
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433
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Help Please...My dilemma
(Preview)
Hi... this is my first post here, but have attended several online meetings. Thought some of you might be able to give insight or direction... My dilemma is this...
My A has been sober for 8 months, goes to AA meetings, meets with a therapist, as do I.
We've been married for 6 yrs, and its been rough. I...
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serenity
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3
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501
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thankyou all
(Preview)
At 2:30 Sunday the phones and cable tv came back on....thankyou HP..my kids were about to drive me over the edge....lol. There was no damage to to my house and a quick rake of the yard was all that I needed to do. Power outages are spotty in the city with heavily wooded neighbor hoods catchin...
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swolves
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1
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373
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I wasn't asking a question
(Preview)
I must have posted "Are they really having fun "out there" before I was fully awake. I really was not asking a question. I was trying to get others to see that the addicts and alcoholics are NOT having fun. I apologize if my post was not clear.
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Powerless
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1
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417
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What else can I do about my daughter?
(Preview)
Hi,
This is the first time posting for me, I don't even know if I'm doing it right. I'll go ahead with my story anyway and hope I can get some suggestions from other members.
My daughter started drinking a year or so ago she is now a fully addicted to vodka. I didn't know there was a problem but it s...
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sandy
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5
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563
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I am going so far backwards
(Preview)
I am going so far backwards that I truly do not recognize the person I have become. I have stolen from my job and was fired this week. My son's therapist said that although he is mentally ill, he is much worse due to my decision making. I am estranged from my entire family at this point. ...
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Powerless
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6
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397
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making peace with the past
(Preview)
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Peace with the Past
Even God cannot change the past. --Agathon
Holding on to the past, either through guilt, longing, denial, or resentment, is a waste of valuable energy - energy that can be used to transform today and tomorrow...
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rosie light shines
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1
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536
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Yet another simple thought
(Preview)
Hi family,
I hope you're not sick of these simple thoughts. But I find they have really helped me over the years. So here's another one for all of you.
"Adversity
often activates a
Strength
we did not know
we had!"
We are all so much stronger than we know. Sometimes it takes a kick in th...
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Karilynn
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1
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340
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A gift from my sponsor
(Preview)
I just wanted to share something that my sponsor did for me....
At christmas we always exchange gifts. Last christmas she blew me out of the water w/her gift.
I got an italian charm bracelet w/the word COURAGE written on it. She told me that for the 9 yrs that she has sponsored me and knowin...
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sg
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3
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378
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I think he is drinking again.
(Preview)
I spent a good part of the evening speaking pn the phone with my younger son in Seattle who is celebrating a birthday tomorrow. Upon ending the conversation I came into the den where my A was asleep in his easy chair. I tried to wake him. Not easy to do. When I finally did, he staggered off to bed. I could see i...
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Diva
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12
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678
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Living in the Present
(Preview)
My meeting this morning is on the topic of "Living in the Present" and last night I was reading/journaling and this page came up:
(Hope For Today, p.317)
Serenity? What's that? For years I was like a weather van that spun around according to the air currents that other people generat...
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sg
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2
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547
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haxigonian XXVIII
(Preview)
[[ room ]]
I hate to ask for further financial assistance...I'm in real need of a $66 transit pass and $55 for storage, both due before Oct. 1. Any help will be appreciated more than you know!!!!
The big news is that my mother's alcoholism has finally come out...so I may have both parents dead fr...
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haximon
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2
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496
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Thank you all but!!!
(Preview)
Hi,
I just want to thank all of you who responded. They actually made me cry but I needed that too. I just want to find a way to help her, she's my baby, she's 30 years old and so much to look forward to. I don't understand, I did everything I could the reason I stayed with her was to be the...
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sandy
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1
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445
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New guy again - my therapist...
(Preview)
My therapist told me last night in an individual session that if I were more "whole" as a person (not co-dependent, had worked through my family of origin issues etc..) that my wife might not have gotten drunk last Saturday night and we might not have had the two day, very ugly, marital spat that we did.
...
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lonestar
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6
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503
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It gets more and more bazaar
(Preview)
Looks like my house is sold. Accepted an offer today after 6 months on the market and numerous price reductions. I have really mixed feelings about it, I designed and built it 3 years ago thinking I would live here forever. We make plans, God laughs! Need to look at it strictly as a business deal now, ma...
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UncleLou
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14
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583
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swolves is ok
(Preview)
It's Saturday morning and swolves' Mom just called me to let us know she and the kids are fine. No phone, but, ok. !! Thank you HP!!
josey
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jrtjosey
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5
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433
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Eyes Wide Open !
(Preview)
Hello Again , Thanks to everyone who replied to my first post , your help and advice was greatly appreciated , especially Tom . I'm off to my first meet on Monday in Limassol ... a 30 minute drive away but the way i'm feeling i'd drive for 3 hours to hear someone tell me i'm not on my own and can recover from all...
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cytagirl
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4
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410
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never ends
(Preview)
I'm feeling so stupid right now.
My A told me two weeks ago he wanted to get sober. He didn't drink all week. Then I went away last weekend to a Women's Spirituality Retreat for women in sobriety, I trusted him (I had to). When I got home I told him how proud I was of him, ect. Then tonight he as...
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Jersey
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6
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427
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Boundaries & Detachment
(Preview)
I had a semi discussion a week ago with my A about the fact that we (me and his kids) were very concerned about him. I told him that we would like to help him when he is ready
however we all know we cannot help him until he is ready. I mentioned that I would be doing a few things differently
. No more waking hi...
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sandie123
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4
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487
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My actions are worse than the addict's
(Preview)
I have been doing a lot of thinking this week. A couple of weeks ago, things were so hard financially and I had exhausted all resources of family and friends. There simply wasn't anyone else I could turn to. I worked in a position of management with developmentally delayed adults....
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Powerless
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5
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387
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Update on Me :)
(Preview)
Hello friends,
My dad may get out of the hospital tomorrow if his blood thinning level is adequate :) Mom and I are much more relaxed now too. He is not suppose to drive for awhile so I will probably stay here another week. I did talk to my daughter 2 nights ago and she opened up to me about alot of her feelin...
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cdb
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6
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465
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Recovery
(Preview)
Hi Everyone
I havnīt posted for a long time but i thought it would be good to post something good.
My recovering A has been clean now for 1 year, not one drop of alcohol has passed his lips. I am so proud of him and of myself for getting through this last year.
It hasnīt been easy, living with him whilst...
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kiki
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2
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362
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"INNER CAUSE OF PROBLEMS" QUOTES
(Preview)
Seek the inner cause of problems
"When you arrive at your future, will you blame your past?"
-- Robert Half
What holds you back from being and doing more? In your journal, list what you believe is holding you back.
Have you blamed people or factors outside of yourself? It's important to unders...
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Lani
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1
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698
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True or False! ----(It is really there this time)
(Preview)
Hello All,
Can you guess which of the following are true and which are false? 1. Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning. 2. Alfred Hitchcock didn't have a belly button. 3. A pack-a-day smoker will lose approximately 2 teeth...
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Dolphin123
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3
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539
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Hard Lessons
(Preview)
Hi Everyone,
I hope you are all well.
I was working 7 days a week this summer, plus taking care of the kids, so I had no free time at all. Now that school has started and the first few hectic weeks are over, I hope things will be settling down.
They say our HP puts us in places for reasons. This summer the...
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Jeannie
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8
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589
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How do you let them hit bottom without them dragging you down
(Preview)
In previous post I talked about leaving my husband about 7 weeks ago. I have since gone home to empty promises of him doing better. I have been home for almost a week now and I am already ready to leave again. I know if nothing changes, nothing changes. I don't know what to do.&n...
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JulieLynn
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3
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468
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Up in Flames
(Preview)
Having such a hard time dealing with a situation with 19 year old son. He has made a decision which I can't agree with (joining army)...but as I know, I am powerless over this. The only thing I can change is ME. Looking back at step 3, it asks "What can I do when my loved ones make decisio...
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kismetstrand
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2
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508
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waiting for the other shoe to fall
(Preview)
Tell me what you all do in this situation.
My H has been the model of good behavior for the past month.
No drugs, no binge drinking. Attending counseling (with and without me)
i just don't believe that it will continue--and I don't know what to do with myself because of it.
I need to stop waiting f...
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gknee
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7
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487
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trying to be tolerent
(Preview)
this is a great message....the language of letting go must have been thinking of me...cause my **tolerence* is being tested with me!!!!
Tolerance
Practice tolerance.
Tolerate our quirks, our feelings, our reactions, our peculiarities, and our humanness. Tolerate our...
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rosie light shines
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0
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326
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how important is it???
(Preview)
Hope for Today - September 23 I suffered from the compulsive need for perfection that I developed while growing up with an alcoholic mother. I found that trying to be perfect was the best defense against her anger. There was no way of knowing what would upset my mother nex...
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rosie light shines
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0
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356
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and a new blow
(Preview)
Hello roomies....
so, here I am at work. The phone rings and it is my A. His uncle (also an A who is active) got drunk last night and they had words and he threw my A out. Now he has nowhere to live. Wants to sit down and "talk" b/c he can't continue paying the house bills if he needs to get...
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Kim
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10
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520
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Disease Misconceptions
(Preview)
A couple of days ago, RichardA wrote this in a reply to a post by raincaster. It caught my eye because I think I felt this way before recovery. He rights:
"...SOME ALCOHOLICS WILL SEE THE LIGHT AND WITH PROPER GUIDANCE WILL HEAL THEMSELVES. I AM NOT A TRUE BELIEVER IN THE DISEASE THEORY BUT I DO BELIEVE T...
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UncleLou
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3
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566
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