Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Becca · Becca

I had a slip today and expressed terrible rage towards my spouse (the alcoholic) and I need to tell on myself and share. I have been in the program for about 2 1/2 years. I recently moved to a new area and there are not as many meetings near me that I'm used to attending. I have worked the...

mollyann · mollyann

Hi Everyone, I found this bit about resentment on the hazeldon.org site and thought I would share: Resentments are the blocks that hold us back from loving others and ourselves. Resentments do not punish the other person. They punish us. They become barriers to feeling good and enjoying life. Res...

bd · bd

Hi group When do we stop trying to help the A's in our life. Will I ever truly learn to let go? I always feel the need to extend my help and feel I'm turning my back it i don't. I understand the term detachment but can it really be achieved especially when an A is a parent. I keep st...

lilleah · lilleah

Hi all! I know I haven't written in awhile, but my A is pretty much on the computer constantly looking for a job. I hope everyone is doing well. I really need everyone right now. I am having terrible problems at work-which I won't go into, except to say it is harassment, and I am planning on speaking...

Powerless · Powerless

I really need views from my friends here. I spent the weekend at my parents about an hour away. We had a wonderful visit. They have offered to come down one day this week while my husband is at work and pack up the essentials and let me come live with them, rent-free until I can find a job...

Maria123 · Maria123

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kitty · kitty

I have been doing fairly well, the last few days... still trying to rest & not stress out too much, which is extremelely difficult for me, I stress about everything compulsively. I am sensitive & empathetic, I did healing work for over 10 years. The last 2 years, I have t...

marmare · marmare

The day started with a phone call from my girlfriend in FL, just checking up on me, we had a wonderful visit....... I probably am writing this for myself, but finding whatever it takes that makes it work is okay! I will finish my coffee this morning then off to run errands. I need to go to th...

pattyann1963 · pattyann1963

ive tried to work these steps but need more insight on these 2 im having so many problems with dealing with me ,ppl at my ftf meetings dont want to sponser dunno y but they dont,i guess or i feel like im at yalls mercy at this they seem to shy away from the steps 4 and 5 anyway,i can look at others problem...

hadit · hadit

First of all, thank you all who responded to my post from last night. I felt good when I wrote it and you all made me feel even better. I am going to try and keep up the good work. Now for the delima. My ex the "A" just called me about ten minutes ago. I still had not returned his calls from...

megan · megan

From Isabela: If you get a chance, give our friends at MIP my love and let them know I have not forogtten any of them and they are often in my thoughts and prayers and I am sending many good thoughts their way...for their health, happiness, and recovery. Isabela is working ver...

leo · leo

Hi I am hoping you guys can come up with a bit of advice here. To those of you who don't know I live in a small town and my husband lost his licence. Of course the bush telegraph was quick and everybody knew about it. For those who didn't know I chose to tell only the ones I wanted to a...

Mars · Mars

encouraged me to look for a site i could be a member of . As he was getting so much from the site he used. i was reading the post`s etc and just thinking of posting again . As now i can bore you rather than friends . i do not discuss my partner with my family anymore if i hear one more "end it ","he is n...

pattyann1963 · pattyann1963

this is the challenge of my life learning how to detach with love everytime

,but ive got to learn it somehow i read alot of alanon lit but not to much on detaching with love it so easy to fall back into those old famieler ways of detaching out of a...

kitty · kitty

Many of you already know my story but I have been under the wheather for a month now & I wasn't on the computer, in fact I was hardly doing anything but praying. I see a lot of new names & I am so happy to know more ppl are finding our safe haven for love, support, encouragement & growth. ...

chrissy · chrissy

AS YOU KNOW MY HUSBAND AND I SEPERATED LAST WEEK HE SAID HE WAS GOING TO MEETINGS AND DOING WELL. HE CALLED ME AFTER HIS MEETING AND SAID HE LOVED ME AND TO COME BY HIM HE WANTED TO TAKE ME & OUR DAUGHTER TO A CARNIVAL AND SPEND THE DAY TOGETHER. SO I SAID GREAT I TOLD MY DAUGHTER...

kitty · kitty

Posting helps so much but I feel I get even more out of the feedback... just to know you're understood, being too critical or wtvr, thank you so much, it really means a lot to me & I appreciate it more than I can express. I feel like you are my sane family!

princess433 · princess433

Hi. I just read your reply to one of my post. I am 13 years old and I was tooken away from my mom when I was 9. I, luckily, had my grandparents to take me in. I know what your granddaughter is feeling. It hurts alot to see someone you know hurt so bad, let alone hurting themself so bad. I think that the worst part f...

gardengal · gardengal

Is there anything that stands in the way of my trusting a HP? What obstacles block me from turning over my will to HP? In my case, the answer is obvious: I want guarantees, I hold out, thinking that I"ll come up with a new solution to my problems even though I've tried and failed again and again. The risk of f...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

There are two kinds of slaves, the prisoners of addiction, and the prisoners of envy. --Ivan Ilich No emotion brings us more personal pain or wastes more of our time than envy. When we envy, we are never free from stress, because envy takes no holidays. Shakespeare called envy the green sickness....

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

A New Pattern Of Living "We suspect that if we do not use what we have, we will lose what we have." Basic Text p. 75 Addiction gave a pattern to our lives, and with it a meaning - a dark, diseased meaning, to be sure, but a meaning nonetheless. The recovery program gives us a new pattern of living to r...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

There are two kinds of slaves, the prisoners of addiction, and the prisoners of envy. --Ivan Ilich No emotion brings us more personal pain or wastes more of our time than envy. When we envy, we are never free from stress, because envy takes no holidays. Shakespeare called envy the green sickness....

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

I remember coming into the program not knowing what it was all about, other than it was for family and friends of alcoholics. I had no idea how it would help me, but had been told a few years prior by a co-worker how wonderful the program was and that it had helped her. She didn't go into detail...

Mars · Mars

well my partner has been dry for 5 weeks , which has been wonderfull but also scarey. i have dreams about him drinking and all that intails . the sulking , arguing, and the police that have been called by a neighbour or ambulance as he has hurt himself . when he is drunk he is a bloody nightmare...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

: Things are great one day, so-so the next in sobriety. Just when I have to Live and Let Live....I forget the LIVE part. That is, LIVE for me, MY LIFE. Wonder if I will ever get it down pat. Just beefin' and appreciate any feedback. &nb...

sg · sg

My A.'s drinking as estranged him from his two step children (12 and 14 yrs old) for a few years now. Neither one of them really have much to do w/him anymore. When he was drinking he was obnoxious and embarassing to them. When he wasn't drinking he was rough, gruff and angry at them. In particular my A. has...

sg · sg

I breed cockatiels for a local pet store. I have four hens nesting right now and yesterday two chicks hatched. It always amazes me when I see these lil' creatures break out of the shell and come into the world. The size of a nickle when born and so full of life. Chirping and peeping so loud to be taken care of...

hadit · hadit

Hi everyone. Well, just when I think I may be making just a little bit of progress working on myself, I slip and screw up. My husband and I have been split up for one month. We have not really seen each other during this time except for a few minutes here and there when he came to the house to pick something u...

confused · confused

I came to the board last night after a week of not feeling well, dragging myself to work and waiting for the next shoe to drop with my A. It was then that I realized just how dumb I was all week. Each night I came home, dinner was ready. Yeah, this is something that I have done for years and years with very few th...

lilleah · lilleah

You know, when I came on tonight, after not being on for awhile, I was upset that my A had gone out without me, when he KNEW I had wanted to go, and he had just offered to take me out tomorrow to appease me. I was taking it very personally. But after reading all these posts, something just hit me, like a ton of br...

hadit · hadit

Hi everyone. Last night I posted on the board about inviting my ex over for dinner and how I was confused as to why I even did it. Your responses were that I love him (which I do), that I miss him (which I do), that I need to do for me first (which I don't). The decision to have him here at what is now MY...

bd · bd

The last time I saw my dad (A) was about 3 weeks ago. They live about 3 hours away. I told them that I was going for this promotion at work (which i didn;t get but thats ok). Anyway I haven't heard from him since. No a good luck when I walked out and not a call to see how things went.&n...

cdb · cdb

Hello friends, The relationship with me and my recoverying alcoholic/drug addicted daughter is going really well now. Being gone from things at home sure helped me alot. I am more relaxed now too. She moved into a house out of town and is renting a room. She can have her dog there and just aquir...

pixel04 · pixel04

Hi, Recently, I have been having trouble letting go of a friend's behavior. We have been through a lot together, much of it good, but lately I have found her behavior to be pretty hurtful. Each morning, I pray for the strength to accept her behavior for what it is and let it go. I don't want to keep bein...

dogscribe · dogscribe

I can't believe it - he got so drunk last night that he was still drunk this morning and actually went to work. Oh my God!!! He really has no clue. We both work at the same company and carpool so at least I drove. He convinced himself that it's all because his neck is bothering him...

marmare · marmare

Day six, I still have not talked to my A. I am so thankful first for the people here on the board. This has been the hardest week for me. People I have known for years always tell me what a strong person I am, but this week I have not felt strong. I have felt lonely, frustrated, tire...

Lani · Lani

Problems are fixed! Thank you, Lani ((((hugs))))

nycbt · nycbt

In my marriage there is close to none at all. In the begin about 6 yrs ago we were doing it alot. But now it like only 2 this year. It was like I got married and now there is no sex. I thought it would be the other way around. The things that have change is that he was doing drugs/drinker heavy when we were first me...

princess433 · princess433

My mom (the alcoholic in my life) has been getting worse latley. She has also been lying alot. I kinda want to just have my grandma tell her that I am not ready to talk to her but then I also wanna tell her that I am mad at her and ask her y. What should I do?? Please help. Love always.. Meg

sooner · sooner

For John and Haxi, I guess it's over now and haxi is gone. I bare no ill will towards either of you. So sorry it had to come to this. I'm sure if there is a next time that all involved (including memebers) will handle things in a different way. I have learned so much from all the view points presented here...

pattyann1963 · pattyann1963

im having problems with working the steps and traditions ,my life seems to a wreck,im going in all sorts diff. diredtions and im comfused,my lifes been like this all my life,now that ive found alanon it seems that ive just got sicker instead of getting better,

kerry5 · kerry5

Happy Thanksgiving! From one pumpkin to another!!!!!!! A woman was asked by a coworker, "What is it like to be a Christian?" The coworker replied, "It is like being a pumpkin. God picks you from the patch, brings you in, and washes all the dirt off of you. Then He cuts off th...

Mars · Mars

that i had a title . my mother and father where both very heavy drinkers to put it mildly . my mother was a volatile and violent woman in private, but a pillar of society in public, did alot of charity work etc, a lady to be feared and admired. i loved her but was scared too. she died at 56 and i was...

captcodee · captcodee

To all my fellow Canucks (and not-so-canucks tee hee).... Have a great long weekend! This is the first long weekend that I am going "home" after getting back together with my Alcoholic husband. And you know, I am so excited! My a...

debilyn · debilyn

I agree with cdb, we all make mistakes or more we all do things out of desperation and then later ask, "why the heck did I do that?" Hax has not made a secret of that fact that he is suffering from depression. This is an illness not unlike any other. I know when I am depressed and desperate I do th...

ednaxray · ednaxray

my mirc works now send me an email..i lost my addy book i will try to mail you some pictures of how to set it up.. dont leave me lani

pattyann1963 · pattyann1963

hello,im needing a sponser been too 15 meetings in alanon,i was raised in alcoholism my dad,my mom was always sober and trying to fix him i moved out of it when i was 16 yrs old and joined job core stayed there for 1 to 2 yrs and came home to marry the dream or love of my life stayed marreied for 16 yrs and 2 kids a...

canadianguy · canadianguy

I have been reading all the recent posts, with a bit of bewilderment, on how easily we can all get off track from our true purpose for being here..... to focus on ourselves, to learn, and to grow. The diversions of the last week make up the "noise" that interrupt our own recoveries.... I ten...

notsonew · notsonew

Hey all, have been watching the boards for a couple of weeks now without posting, appreciate the sharing that let's me know I am not alone. My dad was an alchoholic and managed to get sober when I was about 20. Took a long time to build any sort of relationship and when we did finally...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

There is a divine plan of good at work in my life. I will let go and let it unfold. --Ruth P. Freedman We are never certain of the full importance or the eventual impact of any single event in our lives. But of one thing we can be sure: Each experience offers something valuable to our overall developm...

bd · bd

I was relieved to find this group. I have been suffering in silence for as long as I can remember. The main A in my life was my dad. I was with someone for 13 years but left the marriage for same reasons. I wish I could have a relationship with my dad but it is painful as he is activly...

cindy1359 · cindy1359

I am new to this group. I feel I need help from anyone out there willing to give me advice. I came home today, after working 12 hours, to my husband that was very drunk and angry. I stayed away from him and I was very quiet. He proceeded to yell at me and swear. I asked him please don’t swea...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Depending On Our Higher Power "As recovering addicts, acoas, or codas, we find that we are still dependent, but our dependence has shifted from the things around us to a loving God and the innerstrength we get in our relationship with Him."Basic Text pp.67-68 For many addicts, rebelliousness i...

BlueCloud · BlueCloud

Dear ALL, The other suggestion on this board that has been incredibly helpful to me was the posting about coming up with five solutions to a problem instead of just one solution. This has helped me S-L-O-W D-O-W-N my decision making process and look at alternatives befo...

BlueCloud · BlueCloud

Dear All, Over the past few weeks that I've been reading this message board, I've often read "take care of YOU" and "what are you doing to take care of you?" and "focus on you," but I couldn't quite grasp this concept at first. My first attempts at taking care of myself in relationship with others were m...

Meowzmusic · Meowzmusic

Thank you for your responses and support with my previous post. I am checking on meetings today. I do have one more question. After my husband disappeared for two days drinking, he wanted to come home. He told me he was not happy here and doesn't k...

Lani · Lani

okay....i downloaded mirc and tried to add #alanonachat as it states on the MIP Alanon meeting room. Nothing happens. I know I am blonde...but, this is ridiculous. How does one understand "mirc"...??? LOL

marmare · marmare

I need words of strength today, it has not been a good day. Although I have not heard from my A....my heart is aching and I am an emotional mess. Took the boys to the dentist this morning, one filling turned into a root canal, I know he needed it done but all I could think about was where the hell...

ednaxray · ednaxray

hi john..my mirc is set up by the book..and i have the latest java.. when i try to get in with mirc i get a message that which is like this. Connecting to 216.152.64.151 (7000) - * Unable to connect to server (Connection timed out) - * Connect retry #1 irc.webchat.org (6668) - * Unable to connec...

Angie · Angie

Newbie here, been an alonon member for just a little over a year now. We have a small struggling group, as we are in a remote community in northern Canada. My husband is the active drinker in my life. I was born and raised in the chaos and with the effects of alcohol. Today, I am tired. Its so hard and lonel...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Raging again. I've slipped! (Preview) I had a slip today and expressed terrible rage towards my spouse (the alcoholic) and I need to tell on myself and share. I have been in the program for about 2 1/2 years. I recently moved to a new area and there are not as many meetings near me that I'm used to attending. I have worked the...	Becca	5	600	Oct 9, 2005 by Karilynn
	Resentments and New Beginnings (Preview) Hi Everyone, I found this bit about resentment on the hazeldon.org site and thought I would share: Resentments are the blocks that hold us back from loving others and ourselves. Resentments do not punish the other person. They punish us. They become barriers to feeling good and enjoying life. Res...	mollyann	6	726	Oct 9, 2005 by serenity
	When do we stop trying? (Preview) Hi group When do we stop trying to help the A's in our life. Will I ever truly learn to let go? I always feel the need to extend my help and feel I'm turning my back it i don't. I understand the term detachment but can it really be achieved especially when an A is a parent. I keep st...	bd	4	498	Oct 9, 2005 by Karilynn
	sad and hopeless (Preview) Hi all! I know I haven't written in awhile, but my A is pretty much on the computer constantly looking for a job. I hope everyone is doing well. I really need everyone right now. I am having terrible problems at work-which I won't go into, except to say it is harassment, and I am planning on speaking...	lilleah	4	482	Oct 9, 2005 by Earthmother
	Need a sounding board (Preview) I really need views from my friends here. I spent the weekend at my parents about an hour away. We had a wonderful visit. They have offered to come down one day this week while my husband is at work and pack up the essentials and let me come live with them, rent-free until I can find a job...	Powerless	2	681	Oct 9, 2005 by Karilynn
	Angels Among Us by Alabama (Preview) ----------------------------------------------------------------------------	Maria123	2	476	Oct 9, 2005 by Faith73
	emotionally some days r tougher than others (Preview) I have been doing fairly well, the last few days... still trying to rest & not stress out too much, which is extremelely difficult for me, I stress about everything compulsively. I am sensitive & empathetic, I did healing work for over 10 years. The last 2 years, I have t...	kitty	0	512	Oct 9, 2005 by kitty
	Big Plans (Preview) The day started with a phone call from my girlfriend in FL, just checking up on me, we had a wonderful visit....... I probably am writing this for myself, but finding whatever it takes that makes it work is okay! I will finish my coffee this morning then off to run errands. I need to go to th...	marmare	9	485	Oct 9, 2005 by kitty
	working the 4 and 5 steps (Preview) ive tried to work these steps but need more insight on these 2 im having so many problems with dealing with me ,ppl at my ftf meetings dont want to sponser dunno y but they dont,i guess or i feel like im at yalls mercy at this they seem to shy away from the steps 4 and 5 anyway,i can look at others problem...	pattyann1963	5	484	Oct 9, 2005 by Flora123
	Now what do I do (Preview) First of all, thank you all who responded to my post from last night. I felt good when I wrote it and you all made me feel even better. I am going to try and keep up the good work. Now for the delima. My ex the "A" just called me about ten minutes ago. I still had not returned his calls from...	hadit	5	536	Oct 9, 2005 by jj
	Update on Isabela (Preview) From Isabela: If you get a chance, give our friends at MIP my love and let them know I have not forogtten any of them and they are often in my thoughts and prayers and I am sending many good thoughts their way...for their health, happiness, and recovery. Isabela is working ver...	megan	2	553	Oct 9, 2005 by Flora123
	suggestions (Preview) Hi I am hoping you guys can come up with a bit of advice here. To those of you who don't know I live in a small town and my husband lost his licence. Of course the bush telegraph was quick and everybody knew about it. For those who didn't know I chose to tell only the ones I wanted to a...	leo	9	731	Oct 9, 2005 by leo
	my A partner (Preview) encouraged me to look for a site i could be a member of . As he was getting so much from the site he used. i was reading the post`s etc and just thinking of posting again . As now i can bore you rather than friends . i do not discuss my partner with my family anymore if i hear one more "end it ","he is n...	Mars	1	517	Oct 9, 2005 by lin0606
	Detachment (Preview) this is the challenge of my life learning how to detach with love everytime,but ive got to learn it somehow i read alot of alanon lit but not to much on detaching with love it so easy to fall back into those old famieler ways of detaching out of a...	pattyann1963	2	565	Oct 9, 2005 by lin0606
	respect & boundaires (Preview) Many of you already know my story but I have been under the wheather for a month now & I wasn't on the computer, in fact I was hardly doing anything but praying. I see a lot of new names & I am so happy to know more ppl are finding our safe haven for love, support, encouragement & growth. ...	kitty	3	548	Oct 9, 2005 by kitty
	HERE WE GO AGAIN (Preview) AS YOU KNOW MY HUSBAND AND I SEPERATED LAST WEEK HE SAID HE WAS GOING TO MEETINGS AND DOING WELL. HE CALLED ME AFTER HIS MEETING AND SAID HE LOVED ME AND TO COME BY HIM HE WANTED TO TAKE ME & OUR DAUGHTER TO A CARNIVAL AND SPEND THE DAY TOGETHER. SO I SAID GREAT I TOLD MY DAUGHTER...	chrissy	10	684	Oct 8, 2005 by marmare
	thanks for the feedback (Preview) Posting helps so much but I feel I get even more out of the feedback... just to know you're understood, being too critical or wtvr, thank you so much, it really means a lot to me & I appreciate it more than I can express. I feel like you are my sane family!	kitty	0	410	Oct 8, 2005 by kitty
	Sandy.... (Preview) Hi. I just read your reply to one of my post. I am 13 years old and I was tooken away from my mom when I was 9. I, luckily, had my grandparents to take me in. I know what your granddaughter is feeling. It hurts alot to see someone you know hurt so bad, let alone hurting themself so bad. I think that the worst part f...	princess433	2	548	Oct 8, 2005 by sandy
	TRYING TO CONTROL? (Preview) Is there anything that stands in the way of my trusting a HP? What obstacles block me from turning over my will to HP? In my case, the answer is obvious: I want guarantees, I hold out, thinking that I"ll come up with a new solution to my problems even though I've tried and failed again and again. The risk of f...	gardengal	4	475	Oct 8, 2005 by rosie light shines
	addiction and envy (Preview) *There are two kinds of slaves, the prisoners of addiction, and the prisoners of envy. --Ivan Ilich* No emotion brings us more personal pain or wastes more of our time than envy. When we envy, we are never free from stress, because envy takes no holidays. Shakespeare called envy the green sickness....	rosie light shines	0	380	Oct 8, 2005 by rosie light shines
	i want to keep what i got (Preview) A New Pattern Of Living "We suspect that if we do not use what we have, we will lose what we have." Basic Text p. 75 Addiction gave a pattern to our lives, and with it a meaning - a dark, diseased meaning, to be sure, but a meaning nonetheless. The recovery program gives us a new pattern of living to r...	rosie light shines	0	483	Oct 8, 2005 by rosie light shines
	freeing me from addiction and envy (Preview) *There are two kinds of slaves, the prisoners of addiction, and the prisoners of envy. --Ivan Ilich* No emotion brings us more personal pain or wastes more of our time than envy. When we envy, we are never free from stress, because envy takes no holidays. Shakespeare called envy the green sickness....	rosie light shines	0	388	Oct 8, 2005 by rosie light shines
	The "He He He's/She She She's" (Preview) I remember coming into the program not knowing what it was all about, other than it was for family and friends of alcoholics. I had no idea how it would help me, but had been told a few years prior by a co-worker how wonderful the program was and that it had helped her. She didn't go into detail...	kismetstrand	9	1392	Oct 8, 2005 by Mars
	hi to you all (Preview) well my partner has been dry for 5 weeks , which has been wonderfull but also scarey. i have dreams about him drinking and all that intails . the sulking , arguing, and the police that have been called by a neighbour or ambulance as he has hurt himself . when he is drunk he is a bloody nightmare...	Mars	5	544	Oct 8, 2005 by Mars
	Tough moments....forgetting "LIVE" (Preview) : Things are great one day, so-so the next in sobriety. Just when I have to Live and Let Live....I forget the LIVE part. That is, LIVE for me, MY LIFE. Wonder if I will ever get it down pat. Just beefin' and appreciate any feedback. &nb...	wallsal55	3	696	Oct 8, 2005 by kitty
	Recovery is painful to watch at times (Preview) My A.'s drinking as estranged him from his two step children (12 and 14 yrs old) for a few years now. Neither one of them really have much to do w/him anymore. When he was drinking he was obnoxious and embarassing to them. When he wasn't drinking he was rough, gruff and angry at them. In particular my A. has...	sg	3	497	Oct 8, 2005 by canadianguy
	Spiritual Awakening (Preview) I breed cockatiels for a local pet store. I have four hens nesting right now and yesterday two chicks hatched. It always amazes me when I see these lil' creatures break out of the shell and come into the world. The size of a nickle when born and so full of life. Chirping and peeping so loud to be taken care of...	sg	1	421	Oct 8, 2005 by bubbles1990
	Help me figure this out please (Preview) Hi everyone. Well, just when I think I may be making just a little bit of progress working on myself, I slip and screw up. My husband and I have been split up for one month. We have not really seen each other during this time except for a few minutes here and there when he came to the house to pick something u...	hadit	5	518	Oct 8, 2005 by tara21403
	gratitude/one day at a time (Preview) I came to the board last night after a week of not feeling well, dragging myself to work and waiting for the next shoe to drop with my A. It was then that I realized just how dumb I was all week. Each night I came home, dinner was ready. Yeah, this is something that I have done for years and years with very few th...	confused	4	654	Oct 8, 2005 by notsonew1111
	Thank you (Preview) You know, when I came on tonight, after not being on for awhile, I was upset that my A had gone out without me, when he KNEW I had wanted to go, and he had just offered to take me out tomorrow to appease me. I was taking it very personally. But after reading all these posts, something just hit me, like a ton of br...	lilleah	4	477	Oct 8, 2005 by Maria123
	Finally, I did something for me (Preview) Hi everyone. Last night I posted on the board about inviting my ex over for dinner and how I was confused as to why I even did it. Your responses were that I love him (which I do), that I miss him (which I do), that I need to do for me first (which I don't). The decision to have him here at what is now MY...	hadit	8	649	Oct 8, 2005 by Maria123
	Disappointed (Preview) The last time I saw my dad (A) was about 3 weeks ago. They live about 3 hours away. I told them that I was going for this promotion at work (which i didn;t get but thats ok). Anyway I haven't heard from him since. No a good luck when I walked out and not a call to see how things went.&n...	bd	8	773	Oct 8, 2005 by Kim
	Update on daughter and me :) (Preview) Hello friends, The relationship with me and my recoverying alcoholic/drug addicted daughter is going really well now. Being gone from things at home sure helped me alot. I am more relaxed now too. She moved into a house out of town and is renting a room. She can have her dog there and just aquir...	cdb	5	504	Oct 8, 2005 by david62
	Letting Go (Preview) Hi, Recently, I have been having trouble letting go of a friend's behavior. We have been through a lot together, much of it good, but lately I have found her behavior to be pretty hurtful. Each morning, I pray for the strength to accept her behavior for what it is and let it go. I don't want to keep bein...	pixel04	2	542	Oct 8, 2005 by bob6502
	I can't believe it (Preview) I can't believe it - he got so drunk last night that he was still drunk this morning and actually went to work. Oh my God!!! He really has no clue. We both work at the same company and carpool so at least I drove. He convinced himself that it's all because his neck is bothering him...	dogscribe	10	641	Oct 8, 2005 by KathyS
	Thankful (Preview) Day six, I still have not talked to my A. I am so thankful first for the people here on the board. This has been the hardest week for me. People I have known for years always tell me what a strong person I am, but this week I have not felt strong. I have felt lonely, frustrated, tire...	marmare	5	491	Oct 8, 2005 by Tammy
	Thank you! (Preview) Problems are fixed! Thank you, Lani ((((hugs))))	Lani	0	386	Oct 8, 2005 by Lani
	No Sex (Preview) In my marriage there is close to none at all. In the begin about 6 yrs ago we were doing it alot. But now it like only 2 this year. It was like I got married and now there is no sex. I thought it would be the other way around. The things that have change is that he was doing drugs/drinker heavy when we were first me...	nycbt	6	651	Oct 8, 2005 by lin0606
	I have a very hard decision to make... (Preview) My mom (the alcoholic in my life) has been getting worse latley. She has also been lying alot. I kinda want to just have my grandma tell her that I am not ready to talk to her but then I also wanna tell her that I am mad at her and ask her y. What should I do?? Please help. Love always.. Meg	princess433	4	494	Oct 8, 2005 by roygbiv
	Haximon & John (Preview) For John and Haxi, I guess it's over now and haxi is gone. I bare no ill will towards either of you. So sorry it had to come to this. I'm sure if there is a next time that all involved (including memebers) will handle things in a different way. I have learned so much from all the view points presented here...	sooner	5	1229	Oct 8, 2005 by roygbiv
	confused (Preview) im having problems with working the steps and traditions ,my life seems to a wreck,im going in all sorts diff. diredtions and im comfused,my lifes been like this all my life,now that ive found alanon it seems that ive just got sicker instead of getting better,	pattyann1963	6	500	Oct 8, 2005 by roygbiv
	Happy ThanksGiving Canada (Preview) Happy Thanksgiving! From one pumpkin to another!!!!!!! A woman was asked by a coworker, "What is it like to be a Christian?" The coworker replied, "It is like being a pumpkin. God picks you from the patch, brings you in, and washes all the dirt off of you. Then He cuts off th...	kerry5	3	461	Oct 8, 2005 by Karilynn
	i did `nt know (Preview) that i had a title . my mother and father where both very heavy drinkers to put it mildly . my mother was a volatile and violent woman in private, but a pillar of society in public, did alot of charity work etc, a lady to be feared and admired. i loved her but was scared too. she died at 56 and i was...	Mars	2	455	Oct 8, 2005 by cdb
	Happy Canadian Long Weekend!!! (Preview) To all my fellow Canucks (and not-so-canucks tee hee).... Have a great long weekend! This is the first long weekend that I am going "home" after getting back together with my Alcoholic husband. And you know, I am so excited! My a...	captcodee	3	445	Oct 8, 2005 by Karilynn
	My thoughts (Preview) I agree with cdb, we all make mistakes or more we all do things out of desperation and then later ask, "why the heck did I do that?" Hax has not made a secret of that fact that he is suffering from depression. This is an illness not unlike any other. I know when I am depressed and desperate I do th...	debilyn	0	454	Oct 7, 2005 by debilyn
	hey lani no byebye (Preview) my mirc works now send me an email..i lost my addy book i will try to mail you some pictures of how to set it up.. dont leave me lani	ednaxray	0	481	Oct 7, 2005 by ednaxray
	sponser (Preview) hello,im needing a sponser been too 15 meetings in alanon,i was raised in alcoholism my dad,my mom was always sober and trying to fix him i moved out of it when i was 16 yrs old and joined job core stayed there for 1 to 2 yrs and came home to marry the dream or love of my life stayed marreied for 16 yrs and 2 kids a...	pattyann1963	5	707	Oct 7, 2005 by pattyann1963
	Back to our reason for being here... (Preview) I have been reading all the recent posts, with a bit of bewilderment, on how easily we can all get off track from our true purpose for being here..... to focus on ourselves, to learn, and to grow. The diversions of the last week make up the "noise" that interrupt our own recoveries.... I ten...	canadianguy	1	543	Oct 7, 2005 by captcodee
	Been there done that... (Preview) Hey all, have been watching the boards for a couple of weeks now without posting, appreciate the sharing that let's me know I am not alone. My dad was an alchoholic and managed to get sober when I was about 20. Took a long time to build any sort of relationship and when we did finally...	notsonew	6	506	Oct 7, 2005 by kitty
	i am a dandelion (Preview) *There is a divine plan of good at work in my life. I will let go and let it unfold. --Ruth P. Freedman* We are never certain of the full importance or the eventual impact of any single event in our lives. But of one thing we can be sure: Each experience offers something valuable to our overall developm...	rosie light shines	2	563	Oct 7, 2005 by kitty
	Hi I'm New (Preview) I was relieved to find this group. I have been suffering in silence for as long as I can remember. The main A in my life was my dad. I was with someone for 13 years but left the marriage for same reasons. I wish I could have a relationship with my dad but it is painful as he is activly...	bd	11	622	Oct 7, 2005 by notsonew
	I Need advice (Preview) I am new to this group. I feel I need help from anyone out there willing to give me advice. I came home today, after working 12 hours, to my husband that was very drunk and angry. I stayed away from him and I was very quiet. He proceeded to yell at me and swear. I asked him please don’t swea...	cindy1359	8	531	Oct 7, 2005 by bd
	STEP 3--depending on my HP (Preview) Depending On Our Higher Power "As recovering addicts, acoas, or codas, we find that we are still dependent, but our dependence has shifted from the things around us to a loving God and the innerstrength we get in our relationship with Him."Basic Text pp.67-68 For many addicts, rebelliousness i...	rosie light shines	1	545	Oct 7, 2005 by cdb
	HOPEFUL II (Preview) Dear ALL, The other suggestion on this board that has been incredibly helpful to me was the posting about coming up with five solutions to a problem instead of just one solution. This has helped me S-L-O-W D-O-W-N my decision making process and look at alternatives befo...	BlueCloud	2	470	Oct 7, 2005 by captcodee
	HOPEFUL (Preview) Dear All, Over the past few weeks that I've been reading this message board, I've often read "take care of YOU" and "what are you doing to take care of you?" and "focus on you," but I couldn't quite grasp this concept at first. My first attempts at taking care of myself in relationship with others were m...	BlueCloud	2	478	Oct 7, 2005 by Jeannie
	One More Question (Preview) Thank you for your responses and support with my previous post. I am checking on meetings today. I do have one more question. After my husband disappeared for two days drinking, he wanted to come home. He told me he was not happy here and doesn't k...	Meowzmusic	8	694	Oct 7, 2005 by Ratchie
	mirc help wanted (Preview) okay....i downloaded mirc and tried to add #alanonachat as it states on the MIP Alanon meeting room. Nothing happens. I know I am blonde...but, this is ridiculous. How does one understand "mirc"...??? LOL	Lani	10	663	Oct 7, 2005 by Lani
	Not Good (Preview) I need words of strength today, it has not been a good day. Although I have not heard from my A....my heart is aching and I am an emotional mess. Took the boys to the dentist this morning, one filling turned into a root canal, I know he needed it done but all I could think about was where the hell...	marmare	6	525	Oct 6, 2005 by leo
	john..?? (Preview) hi john..my mirc is set up by the book..and i have the latest java.. when i try to get in with mirc i get a message that which is like this. Connecting to 216.152.64.151 (7000) - * Unable to connect to server (Connection timed out) - * Connect retry #1 irc.webchat.org (6668) - * Unable to connec...	ednaxray	2	517	Oct 6, 2005 by John
	I'm so tired.... (Preview) Newbie here, been an alonon member for just a little over a year now. We have a small struggling group, as we are in a remote community in northern Canada. My husband is the active drinker in my life. I was born and raised in the chaos and with the effects of alcohol. Today, I am tired. Its so hard and lonel...	Angie	8	666	Oct 6, 2005 by bd
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.