Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Jazzie18 · Jazzie18

I was on vacation last week with AH who is currently in recovering and doing well and my parents and brother's family. We were set to all have dinner at my parents house and it ended up getting started late (shocker with four kids under 6 all running around). Well we finally get ready to sit down and eat a...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Well it's been a week and rather bore you all with the details of what is and isn't happening in my life .. let's just say .. the kids and I are moving to AZ .. no plan .. yes I'm a little wild that way and yes hoping and praying for the best. This feels so right. I knew when I married my X it was a mistake .. havin...

Overcome · Overcome

We humans don't like change. We like our routines, our ducks to be in a row, and to be secure. Living with an alcoholic rarely gives us that. Even life after the alcoholic has left, rarely gives us that. I have found that I have to be content in the moment. Live for Today. Just for Today. Change is inevitabl...

Hope2000 · Hope2000

AH was sober for 8mos before relapsing. I have forgotten how crazy I get since I went so long. He last few months have been bad. My children and I both afraid of what we may have coming home to us. He likes to argue, I try to not engage and that seems to anger him more. The screaming starts from him, leaving, dr...

Jerry F · Jerry F

tried my hand at biscuits this morning the outcome seems more like a ceramic class fail. I haven't tried one of these rocks yet as my wife volunteered to do gravy when she gets home from work. In the mean time I got a response to a text inquiry I made earlier to my daughter. I got an off handed heads up fro...

missmeliss · missmeliss

OK a little back story first. My ex nuisance is a sneaky sort of person who likes to invade people's privacy, gather information and then store it up in case he ever finds a way to benefit from it. I used to say he'd turn in his own mother for a $100 reward and I'm not even joking; he used to routinely spy on an...

LedfootJenny · LedfootJenny

Where do those come from? If I didn't have any, I wouldn't feel let down or sad - right? So how did they get in my head? I expect the man I marry to do "a", "b", "c" - but why? We never discussed these before we got married. We didn't write up a contract? Yet I hold him to...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for July 20 speaks about some of the destructive ways in which we attempt to control and manipulate others . It points out that wanting to "know" why the alcoholic drinks or when sober why he does what he does is a question or itch for which there is no scratch. The reading go...

mjferg · mjferg

I feel like I am in a very old rowboat full of holes,every time I patch a hole a new one appears.That pretty much sums up my financial situation.Every time I think I can breathe a sigh of relief something else goes wrong.Today I have to miss class because of car problems again,grr!I know I really need a sa...

mericose · mericose

Good Morning! Thanks for taking the time to read.. I'm not sure if this is the right place for me but I'm not sure where else to turn for support. My story is a long one and probably the same as many of yours so I'm hoping to hear from those who have been or who are where I am right now. Wife and I used to drink...

catlover26 · catlover26

We talked this afternoon and I asked him again what he meant by some of what he said to me because some of it didn't make really any sense. Because of his age, health problems and lack of social contacts what he says doesn't come out right. This can be very difficult to deal with because I usually have to ask...

Tashaking18 · Tashaking18

Hi. I'm new to the group. I have a alcoholic mother. She's Been drinking ever since I can remember (I'm 33 now) and still and constant struggle. over the years my family and I have done different approaches at trying to get mother the help she needs But receently I've fought my own battle with my husband...

catlover26 · catlover26

I posted last night but I still have so much on my mind. It is so hard after 1 1/2 yrs being with my A that I think it could all be over. He really knows me better and I felt sincere love from him more than my ex of 30 yrs. But after 8 mos things started being like a roller coaster. He also has ptsd so I never could tel...

Helpangel · Helpangel

Good morning everyone. Just a recap my ah after slipping twice and telling me the reason he doesn't stop is because he knows that GOD is disappointed in him for not becoming a minister. I told him that I understand that since he will not forgive himself for this sin and since it is the reason it causes him t...

joker · joker

I am so grateful today as my Alcoholic BF has left the city to return to his hometown across the county. I feel so happy and relieved not to have his presence around. I feel such relief not having to deal with his selfish behavior. I told him to take his time, even a month to figure out his life and what he want...

el-cee · el-cee

Hi, I'm back in Italy. It's so beautiful, my higher power is right with me here. Thanks alanon for giving me the courage to live and the eyes to see the beauty. I'm so grateful.x

Helpangel · Helpangel

I did it! I told him that he has chose to drink he has chosen to stop therapy and AA meeting but he is not the only one that is "living with his decision". He has lied to his therapist, he has lied to me and everyone else yet want me to say it is ok and now it's not. I told him I need three months to make su...

giraffe13 · giraffe13

I know progressive memory loss is a symptom of continued drinking. I thought that meant blacking out, and forgetting what they did last week. This past week seemed like it is on a 5 minute interval. One minute he is trying to be nice, the next giving me the cold shoulder and telling me how sick he is of us a...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODA T reading for July 19 speaks about Al-Anon membership. It emphasizes the fact that alanon is a world wide fellowship of people who are working for the same purpose; to build better lives for ourselves and those around us. We do this by positive readings, meditation and prayer and support...

hotrod · hotrod

I had a lovely day yesterday visiting my childhood vacation home. Here is a picture of my sister and I at the carousel that we rode oh so many years ago. "MEMORIES"

catlover26 · catlover26

Tonight when I was at my A's place I wasn't going to discuss an issue with him but I decided to anyway. Over the past 6 mos or more the affection between us has decreased on his part really. Not to go into details really but I was uncomfortable around December something we were doing and I decided we should s...

cloverleaf · cloverleaf

Hey everyone. I've been lurking here for several weeks, reading posts and attending online meetings. I've now attended a few face to face meetings too, but feel I am just barely beginning to understand the basics of the program and how to apply it. My struggle of the moment is - I'm having a hard time wit...

beacheemom · beacheemom

I think my functioning AH is losing it. I really do. No need for details but his short term memory loss is getting worse. He sometimes doesn't even remember doing things. Tonight, it was that he forgot he ordered take out by phone. Me and our youngest come back home shortly after he ordered it and he is mak...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for July 18 speaks about Al-Anon recovery as a long-term process of growth and change. That our efforts to speed up this process will more than likely interfere and we will feel frustrated and depressed. "Easy does it " one day at a time , and "Keep it simple" are...

Bluewater · Bluewater

I served my husband with divorce papers last week. Each and every step of the divorce process has surprised me that instead of relief, I actually feel sadder. I have been married for nearly 2 years. I love my husband very much. I think he loves me too, however I believe he has a drinking problem. I k...

joker · joker

Alcoholic Bf is sleeping after a 2 day bender of 24 hours non stop. 1st night was good. I took some sleep medication and slept. He came into the bed a few times and tried to wake me up but I told him to let me sleep. I guess he had none to listen to his drunk talk. He woke up at 9 am and started drinking again. I trie...

Jmunni29 · Jmunni29

This is my first time sharing on any support group, I find it is needed to try and clear my head. I am a 20 y/o female who is now married and live over an hour away from my parents who are still married. Growing up I have always said that I did not want my father in my life is he continued drinking. Now that I am old...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Today is my 16th anniversary. It had been a long road w a lot of bumps & cracks. But today I still love him even though we disagree a lot & sweat the small stuff sometimes. The program both All anon & AA have taught all of us to accept the things we cannot change including people. It is hard when t...

Helpangel · Helpangel

I am trying to figure out if I have been emotionally and verbally abused and need some clarification. My ah is very negative about everything he can complain and I have asked him repeated to stop but he doesn't. He actually comes to my cubicle after bad meetings and complains to me about how bad they are....

missmeliss · missmeliss

I have a friend over on the side of the world where most of you guys live. Anyway I was having a very black time one day a couple of months ago and I caught her for a chat very early in the morning, in her timezone. She lives in Michigan USA and she said that she was going outside to plant sunflowers with her dau...

Debb · Debb

Have a wonderful day everyone!! {{HUGS}}

deacon · deacon

Annie posted below with the heading. Where have I gone? That has stayed with me for several days now. Because it made me look back and see how I have changed over the years in order to accommodate both husband's and son's drinking. When did I become this person who stays at home most of the time. Not that it...

Carmel 15 · Carmel 15

Hello to everyone here, I am new on this site and have come here as a result of feeling overwhlemed with anxiety on many levels and wondered if any one had some advice or wisdom, which I would welcome so much. My partner of over one year is an alcoholic who has been massively in denial despite many losses in...

norasq · norasq

I was going through some stuff today, and came across this list I'd made of the self-help books I bought as I was struggling with stuff in my marriage and coming to terms with the reality of my AH's drinking problem. It's sort of funny (in an ouch/poignant sort of way) how it sums up the progression and I t...

Debb · Debb

Had to share, that I was sitting on my porch just now, thinking about my yearly mammogram coming up this Wednesday afternoon. Of course, not looking forward to Wednesday, it holds a bit more stress for me because I am a four year breast cancer survivor and while I was praying to my HP for strength and goo...

hotrod · hotrod

Courage to Change reading for July 17 speaks about being detached from others and being able to learn how to be happy whether the alcoholic is drinking or not.It points out that is important for us to keep in mind that we have our own life and our own destiny and it's must be separated from that of the other...

joker · joker

I feel pure anger and rage at my alcoholic bf. In fact I can not stand to be near him. I just hate his guts with a passion. All he does is drink, sleep, work. And now that his brother has passed away, he is really drinking. He flies across the country on Sunday for a week. I can not wait for him to leave. Just to no...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

my AH has gotten us in a terrible financial fix..so ive been taking a new tack. here is what happened today urgent notice from our provider of phone/internet past due/shut off possible. im the user of those things mainly but ah wanted to take care of it . he took out a high credit limet credit card and proo...

almostThere · almostThere

...when I'm going to be perfect? 'Cause I'm getting tired of doing the same ol' thing over and over again! I mean, yeah, my general outlook is way better than it used to be, and yeah, my anger is far better under control than it used to be, and I'm not adding to my resentment warehouse anymore, and yeah, I sp...

missmeliss · missmeliss

On my birthday last Friday, daughter asked me to go down to the waterfront with her so that she could take some pictures. It was rainy and extremely windy and cold and yet I felt really content watching her climb up pylons and hang precariously over edges to take her pictures. I was struck hard by how very...

joker · joker

I have started attending AA meetings again. I do not have a drinking problem, however, its the only 12 step meeting I can attend during the day as there is no al-anon meetings during the day. The more I attend the meetings I am truly amazed how powerful, cunning, baffling this disease is as well as how wid...

joker · joker

I am just sitting her and laughing as I remember what the active alcoholic BF said last week. He was complaining about the amount of money spend on food. He says I only eat 4 dollars a day as I am not home. Since I work night shift and I sleep all day. I am not around to eat. Quit cooking meals and letting food go...

hotrod · hotrod

C2C reading for July 16 speaks about the importance of taking the time to relax because of the benefit to our mental health and well-being.The reading goes on to state that society supports the fact that we should be busy all the time, so that it is often very difficult for us to find the time to jus...

Overcome · Overcome

To follow up on my first post, like I said... "the way to break up with an alcoholic is NOT to get into a relationship with another one." And unfortunately that is just what I did. Like I mentioned in my last post, I had started dating a guy that I had met in an Alzheimer's support group. He had jus...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

This is a short post. I am feeling more contentment & even joy on some days. Thanks to God & the al anon program I feel a sense of security my life. I even welcome a new day! That is a miracle & so am I.

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for July 15 speaks about how Al-Anon is an individual program and that each member can work at their own pace. We are each encouraged to keep showing up , use the tools we are comfortable with and move through recovery at our own pace. There are no should's or timetables. The readi...

catlover26 · catlover26

I am new and working on Step one. My f2f group is covering each Step every 2 weeks which I think is fast but I know there is much work I will do on my own. I wish I could find more info on the "Step work Board" but I haven't been able to find it. One forum member did give me some excellent questions on S...

Nightingale · Nightingale

Well....after having my moment of clarity a week and a half ago...I have been to three f2f meetings...started reading my c2c again and tonight dug out my old Paths to Recovery book to read up on step one. It was so nice to go back to my home group and see so many familiar faces. To be welcomed back with open a...

catlover26 · catlover26

I am dating an alcoholic 16 yrs older than me. The age difference I do have to take into account with some of his actions but I don't want to make excuses for him. I think with him growing up with a stern mother and being bullied as a child plus the fact he was drinking from ages 18-42 has left him now at age 71 so...

Herbalist13 · Herbalist13

Please forgive me, everyone. Trying not to vent too much but I can't take it anymore. My partner is one year and two months sober and I am very proud of him and his heartfelt fight for sobriety. We love each other very much despite the bumps in our road (right now they feel pretty huge) but I believe we ha...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

missmeliss · missmeliss

When I met my A, I had been on a strict personal program of "financial reform". After being horribly financially irresponsible in my early 20's I had used motherhood as the catalyst for big changes and I learnt to be very conscientious, credit-free and frugal. I found I'm quite good at it an...

Darcy0408 · Darcy0408

I've only been going great to al-anon for a week and 2 days. I have heard so much about how i have no control over my ah'a drinking. 8 days ago it got so scary that I decided to leave. I've never even threatened to leave before and then there he was wanting to try to make it work. I told him that if he would try to q...

Jerry F · Jerry F

The disease progresses in the next generation with my Daughter in law attempting to handle the emotional, mental, spiritual and physical conflict of our disease as manifested by my eldest son. He is everything I've learned about alcoholism over the past 36years of recovery. So is she yet she is s...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Today's HFT opens with the first five words of the serenity prayer, then goes on to consider what the word 'serenity' means. For the writer, serenity is thinking of self and others with honor, respect, reverence due as a child of God. One of my most common 'steps backward' is w...

el-cee · el-cee

Mirandac · Mirandac

i was doing so good in my new apt the last three nights i can not go into deep sleep my xah is in my brain when i am sleeping. i think of him all night tossing and turning. it must be still be part of the process of letting go. I hope it ends, i am tired of all this emotional stuff with him. i am so use to taking care...

almostThere · almostThere

Short on time, but had to share. Went to dinner with the A. Haven't done that in a while. mid-dinner she announced that in 3 weeks she's going to take a trip. I won't get into the details of where or why, but she takes this trip with a family member a few times a year, it's for a good purpose and I don't objec...

softie · softie

Hi,this is my first time here not sure what to do , my problem is I cannot say no to my son who has a drink problem.If he asks for money I give it to him even though I know he will spend it on drink . Why can I not simply say no.

Annie1 · Annie1

I have a very high functioning AH. He pays all the bills except childcare, my gas, groceries and the garbage bill. He goes to work everyday and works anywhere from 50-60 hours a week. He almost never calls in. When he does he is either actually sick or its due to staying up to late and drinking too much...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Crazy woman in the house (Preview) I was on vacation last week with AH who is currently in recovering and doing well and my parents and brother's family. We were set to all have dinner at my parents house and it ended up getting started late (shocker with four kids under 6 all running around). Well we finally get ready to sit down and eat a...	Jazzie18	6	1010	Jul 21, 2015 by Jill
	Sooo .. LOL .. oh boy .. (Preview) Well it's been a week and rather bore you all with the details of what is and isn't happening in my life .. let's just say .. the kids and I are moving to AZ .. no plan .. yes I'm a little wild that way and yes hoping and praying for the best. This feels so right. I knew when I married my X it was a mistake .. havin...	SerenityRUS	9	857	Jul 21, 2015 by Jozie
	Resisting Change (Preview) We humans don't like change. We like our routines, our ducks to be in a row, and to be secure. Living with an alcoholic rarely gives us that. Even life after the alcoholic has left, rarely gives us that. I have found that I have to be content in the moment. Live for Today. Just for Today. Change is inevitabl...	Overcome	4	604	Jul 21, 2015 by Breakingfree
	What to do? (Preview) AH was sober for 8mos before relapsing. I have forgotten how crazy I get since I went so long. He last few months have been bad. My children and I both afraid of what we may have coming home to us. He likes to argue, I try to not engage and that seems to anger him more. The screaming starts from him, leaving, dr...	Hope2000	14	808	Jul 21, 2015 by Jazzie18
	practice, practice PRACTICE!! (Preview) tried my hand at biscuits this morning the outcome seems more like a ceramic class fail. I haven't tried one of these rocks yet as my wife volunteered to do gravy when she gets home from work. In the mean time I got a response to a text inquiry I made earlier to my daughter. I got an off handed heads up fro...	Jerry F	21	1077	Jul 21, 2015 by Breakingfree
	Gahhhh, so angry :-( (Preview) OK a little back story first. My ex nuisance is a sneaky sort of person who likes to invade people's privacy, gather information and then store it up in case he ever finds a way to benefit from it. I used to say he'd turn in his own mother for a $100 reward and I'm not even joking; he used to routinely spy on an...	missmeliss	32	1084	Jul 21, 2015 by Breakingfree
	Expectations.... (Preview) Where do those come from? If I didn't have any, I wouldn't feel let down or sad - right? So how did they get in my head? I expect the man I marry to do "a", "b", "c" - but why? We never discussed these before we got married. We didn't write up a contract? Yet I hold him to...	LedfootJenny	14	915	Jul 21, 2015 by Breakingfree
	ODAT 7-20 (Preview) The ODAT reading for July 20 speaks about some of the destructive ways in which we attempt to control and manipulate others . It points out that wanting to "know" why the alcoholic drinks or when sober why he does what he does is a question or itch for which there is no scratch. The reading go...	hotrod	4	627	Jul 20, 2015 by vorpal
	money woes! (Preview) I feel like I am in a very old rowboat full of holes,every time I patch a hole a new one appears.That pretty much sums up my financial situation.Every time I think I can breathe a sigh of relief something else goes wrong.Today I have to miss class because of car problems again,grr!I know I really need a sa...	mjferg	10	702	Jul 20, 2015 by catlover26
	New to this (Preview) Good Morning! Thanks for taking the time to read.. I'm not sure if this is the right place for me but I'm not sure where else to turn for support. My story is a long one and probably the same as many of yours so I'm hoping to hear from those who have been or who are where I am right now. Wife and I used to drink...	mericose	4	503	Jul 20, 2015 by Iamhere
	Going to try again with A (Preview) We talked this afternoon and I asked him again what he meant by some of what he said to me because some of it didn't make really any sense. Because of his age, health problems and lack of social contacts what he says doesn't come out right. This can be very difficult to deal with because I usually have to ask...	catlover26	1	448	Jul 20, 2015 by Iamhere
	New to group! (Preview) Hi. I'm new to the group. I have a alcoholic mother. She's Been drinking ever since I can remember (I'm 33 now) and still and constant struggle. over the years my family and I have done different approaches at trying to get mother the help she needs But receently I've fought my own battle with my husband...	Tashaking18	6	515	Jul 20, 2015 by hotrod
	The reality when the relationship is probably over (Preview) I posted last night but I still have so much on my mind. It is so hard after 1 1/2 yrs being with my A that I think it could all be over. He really knows me better and I felt sincere love from him more than my ex of 30 yrs. But after 8 mos things started being like a roller coaster. He also has ptsd so I never could tel...	catlover26	3	386	Jul 19, 2015 by catlover26
	Boundary given (Preview) Good morning everyone. Just a recap my ah after slipping twice and telling me the reason he doesn't stop is because he knows that GOD is disappointed in him for not becoming a minister. I told him that I understand that since he will not forgive himself for this sin and since it is the reason it causes him t...	Helpangel	11	765	Jul 19, 2015 by andromeda
	Grateful today (Preview) I am so grateful today as my Alcoholic BF has left the city to return to his hometown across the county. I feel so happy and relieved not to have his presence around. I feel such relief not having to deal with his selfish behavior. I told him to take his time, even a month to figure out his life and what he want...	joker	2	462	Jul 19, 2015 by Iamhere
	Im serene in paradise (Preview) Hi, I'm back in Italy. It's so beautiful, my higher power is right with me here. Thanks alanon for giving me the courage to live and the eyes to see the beauty. I'm so grateful.x	el-cee	5	411	Jul 19, 2015 by Iamhere
	Follow on to boundary given- we have plans of him moving out (Preview) I did it! I told him that he has chose to drink he has chosen to stop therapy and AA meeting but he is not the only one that is "living with his decision". He has lied to his therapist, he has lied to me and everyone else yet want me to say it is ok and now it's not. I told him I need three months to make su...	Helpangel	3	450	Jul 19, 2015 by Iamhere
	progressive memory loss? (Preview) I know progressive memory loss is a symptom of continued drinking. I thought that meant blacking out, and forgetting what they did last week. This past week seemed like it is on a 5 minute interval. One minute he is trying to be nice, the next giving me the cold shoulder and telling me how sick he is of us a...	giraffe13	10	677	Jul 19, 2015 by Jerry F
	ODAT Reading 7-19 (Preview) The ODA T reading for July 19 speaks about Al-Anon membership. It emphasizes the fact that alanon is a world wide fellowship of people who are working for the same purpose; to build better lives for ourselves and those around us. We do this by positive readings, meditation and prayer and support...	hotrod	1	433	Jul 19, 2015 by Debb
	Yesterday (Preview) I had a lovely day yesterday visiting my childhood vacation home. Here is a picture of my sister and I at the carousel that we rode oh so many years ago. "MEMORIES"	hotrod	16	612	Jul 19, 2015 by Lyne
	My A boyfriend blaming too much on me (Preview) Tonight when I was at my A's place I wasn't going to discuss an issue with him but I decided to anyway. Over the past 6 mos or more the affection between us has decreased on his part really. Not to go into details really but I was uncomfortable around December something we were doing and I decided we should s...	catlover26	4	532	Jul 19, 2015 by hotrod
	overreacting? (Preview) Hey everyone. I've been lurking here for several weeks, reading posts and attending online meetings. I've now attended a few face to face meetings too, but feel I am just barely beginning to understand the basics of the program and how to apply it. My struggle of the moment is - I'm having a hard time wit...	cloverleaf	17	930	Jul 18, 2015 by almostThere
	what is going on w the short term memory loss? (Preview) I think my functioning AH is losing it. I really do. No need for details but his short term memory loss is getting worse. He sometimes doesn't even remember doing things. Tonight, it was that he forgot he ordered take out by phone. Me and our youngest come back home shortly after he ordered it and he is mak...	beacheemom	9	647	Jul 18, 2015 by Fairlee
	C2C 7-18 (Preview) The C2C reading for July 18 speaks about Al-Anon recovery as a long-term process of growth and change. That our efforts to speed up this process will more than likely interfere and we will feel frustrated and depressed. "Easy does it " one day at a time , and "Keep it simple" are...	hotrod	2	452	Jul 18, 2015 by Iamhere
	Divorce process and crazy (not wishful) thinking (Preview) I served my husband with divorce papers last week. Each and every step of the divorce process has surprised me that instead of relief, I actually feel sadder. I have been married for nearly 2 years. I love my husband very much. I think he loves me too, however I believe he has a drinking problem. I k...	Bluewater	13	799	Jul 18, 2015 by pinkchip
	Insane words of alcoholic just do not end (Preview) Alcoholic Bf is sleeping after a 2 day bender of 24 hours non stop. 1st night was good. I took some sleep medication and slept. He came into the bed a few times and tried to wake me up but I told him to let me sleep. I guess he had none to listen to his drunk talk. He woke up at 9 am and started drinking again. I trie...	joker	3	492	Jul 18, 2015 by pinkchip
	Dealing with an enabling mother and an alcoholic father and his rapid decline. Alcoholic father daddy's girl ACA ACOA enabling (Preview) This is my first time sharing on any support group, I find it is needed to try and clear my head. I am a 20 y/o female who is now married and live over an hour away from my parents who are still married. Growing up I have always said that I did not want my father in my life is he continued drinking. Now that I am old...	Jmunni29	6	6159	Jul 18, 2015 by hotrod
	16 years (Preview) Today is my 16th anniversary. It had been a long road w a lot of bumps & cracks. But today I still love him even though we disagree a lot & sweat the small stuff sometimes. The program both All anon & AA have taught all of us to accept the things we cannot change including people. It is hard when t...	Hoot Nanny	7	500	Jul 17, 2015 by hotrod
	Emotional and verbal abuse (Preview) I am trying to figure out if I have been emotionally and verbally abused and need some clarification. My ah is very negative about everything he can complain and I have asked him repeated to stop but he doesn't. He actually comes to my cubicle after bad meetings and complains to me about how bad they are....	Helpangel	3	667	Jul 17, 2015 by Debb
	On a brighter note (Preview) I have a friend over on the side of the world where most of you guys live. Anyway I was having a very black time one day a couple of months ago and I caught her for a chat very early in the morning, in her timezone. She lives in Michigan USA and she said that she was going outside to plant sunflowers with her dau...	missmeliss	4	520	Jul 17, 2015 by Debb
	Strong/Miserable (Preview) Have a wonderful day everyone!! {{HUGS}}	Debb	8	697	Jul 17, 2015 by almostThere
	I think somehow I have lost myself (Preview) Annie posted below with the heading. Where have I gone? That has stayed with me for several days now. Because it made me look back and see how I have changed over the years in order to accommodate both husband's and son's drinking. When did I become this person who stays at home most of the time. Not that it...	deacon	8	771	Jul 17, 2015 by almostThere
	Overwhlemed with anxiety as my partner enters rehab. (Preview) Hello to everyone here, I am new on this site and have come here as a result of feeling overwhlemed with anxiety on many levels and wondered if any one had some advice or wisdom, which I would welcome so much. My partner of over one year is an alcoholic who has been massively in denial despite many losses in...	Carmel 15	10	634	Jul 17, 2015 by almostThere
	History of the decline of my marriage to an alcoholic, as evident from my Kindle book purchases (Preview) I was going through some stuff today, and came across this list I'd made of the self-help books I bought as I was struggling with stuff in my marriage and coming to terms with the reality of my AH's drinking problem. It's sort of funny (in an ouch/poignant sort of way) how it sums up the progression and I t...	norasq	7	824	Jul 17, 2015 by giraffe13
	Just Simple A Lovely Sign (Preview) Had to share, that I was sitting on my porch just now, thinking about my yearly mammogram coming up this Wednesday afternoon. Of course, not looking forward to Wednesday, it holds a bit more stress for me because I am a four year breast cancer survivor and while I was praying to my HP for strength and goo...	Debb	13	669	Jul 17, 2015 by likemyheart
	C2C 7-17 (Preview) Courage to Change reading for July 17 speaks about being detached from others and being able to learn how to be happy whether the alcoholic is drinking or not.It points out that is important for us to keep in mind that we have our own life and our own destiny and it's must be separated from that of the other...	hotrod	1	430	Jul 17, 2015 by Iamhere
	Feel Anger (Preview) I feel pure anger and rage at my alcoholic bf. In fact I can not stand to be near him. I just hate his guts with a passion. All he does is drink, sleep, work. And now that his brother has passed away, he is really drinking. He flies across the country on Sunday for a week. I can not wait for him to leave. Just to no...	joker	8	556	Jul 16, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	Giving away the aggravation (Preview) my AH has gotten us in a terrible financial fix..so ive been taking a new tack. here is what happened today urgent notice from our provider of phone/internet past due/shut off possible. im the user of those things mainly but ah wanted to take care of it . he took out a high credit limet credit card and proo...	YARNCRAZY	4	690	Jul 16, 2015 by Iamhere
	Can anyone tell me... (Preview) ...when I'm going to be perfect? 'Cause I'm getting tired of doing the same ol' thing over and over again! I mean, yeah, my general outlook is way better than it used to be, and yeah, my anger is far better under control than it used to be, and I'm not adding to my resentment warehouse anymore, and yeah, I sp...	almostThere	9	745	Jul 16, 2015 by Fairlee
	Pictures and ponderings. (Preview) On my birthday last Friday, daughter asked me to go down to the waterfront with her so that she could take some pictures. It was rainy and extremely windy and cold and yet I felt really content watching her climb up pylons and hang precariously over edges to take her pictures. I was struck hard by how very...	missmeliss	8	935	Jul 16, 2015 by Hoot Nanny
	Delusions of the Alcoholic (Preview) I have started attending AA meetings again. I do not have a drinking problem, however, its the only 12 step meeting I can attend during the day as there is no al-anon meetings during the day. The more I attend the meetings I am truly amazed how powerful, cunning, baffling this disease is as well as how wid...	joker	3	2831	Jul 16, 2015 by Yankeerose
	Unrealistic things the alcoholic says (Preview) I am just sitting her and laughing as I remember what the active alcoholic BF said last week. He was complaining about the amount of money spend on food. He says I only eat 4 dollars a day as I am not home. Since I work night shift and I sleep all day. I am not around to eat. Quit cooking meals and letting food go...	joker	7	864	Jul 16, 2015 by CoopsMom
	C2C 7-16 (Preview) C2C reading for July 16 speaks about the importance of taking the time to relax because of the benefit to our mental health and well-being.The reading goes on to state that society supports the fact that we should be busy all the time, so that it is often very difficult for us to find the time to jus...	hotrod	4	505	Jul 16, 2015 by Cathyinaz
	How to Break up with an Alcoholic II (Preview) To follow up on my first post, like I said... "the way to break up with an alcoholic is NOT to get into a relationship with another one." And unfortunately that is just what I did. Like I mentioned in my last post, I had started dating a guy that I had met in an Alzheimer's support group. He had jus...	Overcome	4	907	Jul 16, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	finally more secure (Preview) This is a short post. I am feeling more contentment & even joy on some days. Thanks to God & the al anon program I feel a sense of security my life. I even welcome a new day! That is a miracle & so am I.	Hoot Nanny	3	384	Jul 15, 2015 by Iamhere
	C2C 7-15 (Preview) The C2C reading for July 15 speaks about how Al-Anon is an individual program and that each member can work at their own pace. We are each encouraged to keep showing up , use the tools we are comfortable with and move through recovery at our own pace. There are no should's or timetables. The readi...	hotrod	9	594	Jul 15, 2015 by DavidG
	When to work the Traditions? (Preview) I am new and working on Step one. My f2f group is covering each Step every 2 weeks which I think is fast but I know there is much work I will do on my own. I wish I could find more info on the "Step work Board" but I haven't been able to find it. One forum member did give me some excellent questions on S...	catlover26	2	295	Jul 15, 2015 by catlover26
	Firmly planted in step one...again (Preview) Well....after having my moment of clarity a week and a half ago...I have been to three f2f meetings...started reading my c2c again and tonight dug out my old Paths to Recovery book to read up on step one. It was so nice to go back to my home group and see so many familiar faces. To be welcomed back with open a...	Nightingale	4	661	Jul 15, 2015 by Iamhere
	Trying to accept my boyfriend the way he is (Preview) I am dating an alcoholic 16 yrs older than me. The age difference I do have to take into account with some of his actions but I don't want to make excuses for him. I think with him growing up with a stern mother and being bullied as a child plus the fact he was drinking from ages 18-42 has left him now at age 71 so...	catlover26	3	623	Jul 15, 2015 by hotrod
	Past The First Year And Want To Rip My Hair Out (Preview) Please forgive me, everyone. Trying not to vent too much but I can't take it anymore. My partner is one year and two months sober and I am very proud of him and his heartfelt fight for sobriety. We love each other very much despite the bumps in our road (right now they feel pretty huge) but I believe we ha...	Herbalist13	24	775	Jul 15, 2015 by milkwood
	The Arizona Sky - I am grateful (Preview)	Cathyinaz	13	571	Jul 14, 2015 by Breakingfree
	Tangible rewards. (A long ramble, feel free to ignore) (Preview) When I met my A, I had been on a strict personal program of "financial reform". After being horribly financially irresponsible in my early 20's I had used motherhood as the catalyst for big changes and I learnt to be very conscientious, credit-free and frugal. I found I'm quite good at it an...	missmeliss	12	643	Jul 14, 2015 by Breakingfree
	How do I detach (Preview) I've only been going great to al-anon for a week and 2 days. I have heard so much about how i have no control over my ah'a drinking. 8 days ago it got so scary that I decided to leave. I've never even threatened to leave before and then there he was wanting to try to make it work. I told him that if he would try to q...	Darcy0408	5	618	Jul 14, 2015 by Darcy0408
	Getting past the family... (Preview) The disease progresses in the next generation with my Daughter in law attempting to handle the emotional, mental, spiritual and physical conflict of our disease as manifested by my eldest son. He is everything I've learned about alcoholism over the past 36years of recovery. So is she yet she is s...	Jerry F	3	501	Jul 14, 2015 by hotrod
	Hope for Today July 14 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Today's HFT opens with the first five words of the serenity prayer, then goes on to consider what the word 'serenity' means. For the writer, serenity is thinking of self and others with honor, respect, reverence due as a child of God. One of my most common 'steps backward' is w...	yanksfan51	10	724	Jul 14, 2015 by maryjane
	True (Preview)	el-cee	4	337	Jul 14, 2015 by Debb
	Three nights sleepless (Preview) i was doing so good in my new apt the last three nights i can not go into deep sleep my xah is in my brain when i am sleeping. i think of him all night tossing and turning. it must be still be part of the process of letting go. I hope it ends, i am tired of all this emotional stuff with him. i am so use to taking care...	Mirandac	24	761	Jul 14, 2015 by Hoot Nanny
	A quick birthday ESH (Preview) Short on time, but had to share. Went to dinner with the A. Haven't done that in a while. mid-dinner she announced that in 3 weeks she's going to take a trip. I won't get into the details of where or why, but she takes this trip with a family member a few times a year, it's for a good purpose and I don't objec...	almostThere	7	564	Jul 13, 2015 by maryjane
	cant say no (Preview) Hi,this is my first time here not sure what to do , my problem is I cannot say no to my son who has a drink problem.If he asks for money I give it to him even though I know he will spend it on drink . Why can I not simply say no.	softie	10	686	Jul 13, 2015 by Jerry F
	Where have I gone? AH high functioning kids lost anger hate (Preview) I have a very high functioning AH. He pays all the bills except childcare, my gas, groceries and the garbage bill. He goes to work everyday and works anywhere from 50-60 hours a week. He almost never calls in. When he does he is either actually sick or its due to staying up to late and drinking too much...	Annie1	13	9082	Jul 13, 2015 by Skorpi
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