Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Helpangel · Helpangel

I couldn't hear anymore about him, I just couldn't. I know I wanted to wait till Bulls got paid but I just couldn't. I just got mad when he was talking the usual manipulation games and told him that I couldn't do it anymore. I actually told him to take his stuff and his money and go on a post it note! Yes folks I...

hotrod · hotrod

We are beginning a new round of the Steps on the Step Work BoardThe first Step has been posted Learn How The Twelve Steps Work. Please join in and share your thoughts Here is the link http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t60562974/step-one-alanon-7-2015

Jozie · Jozie

Funny how when I look back from where I started to where I am Now, I would like to think I have Moved some Mountains I think Growing up under the thumb of active alcoholics & addicts makes me someone at times I cant even understand When I got to Al-Anon almost 7yrs ago, I was Broken I Couldnt tell you wha...

PUPPY · PUPPY

I am new to this, but have been going to Al-anon meetings in my area. We haven't heard from our son since his release from a 3 months jail stent for possession of drugs. This has been going on since he was 15, he is now 30. He has stole from us, lied to us, made up stories about us; yet as his mother I kept givi...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for today, July 23 speaks about developing/ or reclaiming our sense of humor. It points out that when we first enter the rooms we have lost our ability to see the humor in life as we always seem to view it as chaotic and filled with tragedy and pain. The reading goes on to suggest that the...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hi Everyone! Things are still going well for me, and my AW is still sober and working her AA program, and I am moving closer to finding a sponsor in my face to face group. This weekend, we are going north to the small hunting shack my grandfather built. The foundation is sinking on one side, and the shack...

oceanpine · oceanpine

Last time I posted, in Feb, I was just moving out from my house. My AH had done the same bad behavior one more time - secretly drinking and then acting aggressively mean to me. I had told him that I would leave if he did that again. So I did. I haven't posted again because I did have support from friends and my...

holdemfoldem · holdemfoldem

My daughter is 26, is an alcoholic for some years now. She got clean and was staying with friends in a recovery house. She was walking the walk and talking the talk. I was looking forward to meeting up with her, (as I'd done before), at an AA meeting where she was to receive acknowledgement for staying...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I just need some positive thoughts and prayers at the moment. My mom is being extremely manipulative and wants us to come to California. All of a sudden now that she realizes we are not moving to California she's going on about how she can't really help. I was counting on her helping and this really pu...

hopefortoday29 · hopefortoday29

I've been reading the step 4 section of Paths to Recovery recently as I start my own inventory. The four words that keep coming up are love, kindness, honesty and balance. There are a couple of suggestions about using key words as the backbone of our inventory for example managing, martyrdom, manipul...

Debb · Debb

Have a wonderful day my friends! {{HUGS}}

hotrod · hotrod

The ODA T reading for July 22 speaks about the fact that it is a waste of time to attempt to understand the disease of alcoholism by studying books on the disease. It points out that most of us do this because we believe the more information we have, the better we will be able to cope with the disease and...

missmeliss · missmeliss

I worked up the nerve to text my ex, "I am not comfortable with you being in my house and I don't want it to happen again" The reply I got back was "I needed to be sure our daughter isn't living in a scene from trainspotting" Trainspotting is a 90's cult movie about heroin addicts. Odd...

sweeetr · sweeetr

So my AexH is in 1/2 way house for now and then possibly some jail time. I take care of our son, and I got his two BIG dogs, by default..... At the time I didnt mind as I knew they would continue to be neglected and not fed or watered as I was only one that did that when I realized he didnt .. He left them in horribl...

Quakeroat · Quakeroat

last nights face to face was a wonderful thing to behold and feel. The meeting took off as a discussion rather than step 7 and everyone just knew it was right to let it be. the two latest members said more last night than they have said so far in a meeting and we are getting to know them as a group with real unit...

Hopeswims22 · Hopeswims22

if I have learned anything from these FTF meetings, is that life is too short. I get myself wrapped up in who is right or wrong or the insanity conversation that doesn't make any sense. So tired of both. Today I want peace and happiness. Pretty simple stuff but so hard to find each day. It is a hide and se...

astallaslions · astallaslions

I don't know if I believe in coincidence in life anymore, and as much as the word manifestation seems silly, it feels real. I had been having a relapse moment the last couple of weeks after some failed romantic flings inspired me to lament my relationship with my A, and wish that I could reconnect with h...

Jozie · Jozie

The Cycle of Sickness is So Deep in My Family... And I have Slowly Learned the "Carrot & the Stick" Manipulations they have always Strived on.... BUT... I Didn't Bite :D

I had Engaged in Conversation with my Older Sis (Currently Dry Drunk) and tho she does not have a Program, I do t...

missmeliss · missmeliss

A and I seem to be doing a really stupid dance. I invite him to come over and spend time with me when daughter is at her dads. He can't make it, every time and then he wants to come over a dew days later when daughter is home and asks a long, boring and predictable string of questions about "aren't we ever...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I have found myself being rude when people around me start talking about other people around them. Not that they are talking badly of them, just pointing out what and how they do things contrary to their way and blah, blah, blah. I hate it! I don't want to hear about how someone else parents and how they li...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

good morning everyone- Today's reading is about unity and how it applies to our alanon groups and our recoveries. For me the power of unity is felt every time I come to this site and read a post that makes me think 'oh yes I have been there' or ' I have felt just like that'. The strength in unity has been fel...

Jazzie18 · Jazzie18

I was on vacation last week with AH who is currently in recovering and doing well and my parents and brother's family. We were set to all have dinner at my parents house and it ended up getting started late (shocker with four kids under 6 all running around). Well we finally get ready to sit down and eat a...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Well it's been a week and rather bore you all with the details of what is and isn't happening in my life .. let's just say .. the kids and I are moving to AZ .. no plan .. yes I'm a little wild that way and yes hoping and praying for the best. This feels so right. I knew when I married my X it was a mistake .. havin...

Overcome · Overcome

We humans don't like change. We like our routines, our ducks to be in a row, and to be secure. Living with an alcoholic rarely gives us that. Even life after the alcoholic has left, rarely gives us that. I have found that I have to be content in the moment. Live for Today. Just for Today. Change is inevitabl...

Hope2000 · Hope2000

AH was sober for 8mos before relapsing. I have forgotten how crazy I get since I went so long. He last few months have been bad. My children and I both afraid of what we may have coming home to us. He likes to argue, I try to not engage and that seems to anger him more. The screaming starts from him, leaving, dr...

Jerry F · Jerry F

tried my hand at biscuits this morning the outcome seems more like a ceramic class fail. I haven't tried one of these rocks yet as my wife volunteered to do gravy when she gets home from work. In the mean time I got a response to a text inquiry I made earlier to my daughter. I got an off handed heads up fro...

missmeliss · missmeliss

OK a little back story first. My ex nuisance is a sneaky sort of person who likes to invade people's privacy, gather information and then store it up in case he ever finds a way to benefit from it. I used to say he'd turn in his own mother for a $100 reward and I'm not even joking; he used to routinely spy on an...

LedfootJenny · LedfootJenny

Where do those come from? If I didn't have any, I wouldn't feel let down or sad - right? So how did they get in my head? I expect the man I marry to do "a", "b", "c" - but why? We never discussed these before we got married. We didn't write up a contract? Yet I hold him to...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for July 20 speaks about some of the destructive ways in which we attempt to control and manipulate others . It points out that wanting to "know" why the alcoholic drinks or when sober why he does what he does is a question or itch for which there is no scratch. The reading go...

mjferg · mjferg

I feel like I am in a very old rowboat full of holes,every time I patch a hole a new one appears.That pretty much sums up my financial situation.Every time I think I can breathe a sigh of relief something else goes wrong.Today I have to miss class because of car problems again,grr!I know I really need a sa...

mericose · mericose

Good Morning! Thanks for taking the time to read.. I'm not sure if this is the right place for me but I'm not sure where else to turn for support. My story is a long one and probably the same as many of yours so I'm hoping to hear from those who have been or who are where I am right now. Wife and I used to drink...

catlover26 · catlover26

We talked this afternoon and I asked him again what he meant by some of what he said to me because some of it didn't make really any sense. Because of his age, health problems and lack of social contacts what he says doesn't come out right. This can be very difficult to deal with because I usually have to ask...

Tashaking18 · Tashaking18

Hi. I'm new to the group. I have a alcoholic mother. She's Been drinking ever since I can remember (I'm 33 now) and still and constant struggle. over the years my family and I have done different approaches at trying to get mother the help she needs But receently I've fought my own battle with my husband...

catlover26 · catlover26

I posted last night but I still have so much on my mind. It is so hard after 1 1/2 yrs being with my A that I think it could all be over. He really knows me better and I felt sincere love from him more than my ex of 30 yrs. But after 8 mos things started being like a roller coaster. He also has ptsd so I never could tel...

Helpangel · Helpangel

Good morning everyone. Just a recap my ah after slipping twice and telling me the reason he doesn't stop is because he knows that GOD is disappointed in him for not becoming a minister. I told him that I understand that since he will not forgive himself for this sin and since it is the reason it causes him t...

joker · joker

I am so grateful today as my Alcoholic BF has left the city to return to his hometown across the county. I feel so happy and relieved not to have his presence around. I feel such relief not having to deal with his selfish behavior. I told him to take his time, even a month to figure out his life and what he want...

el-cee · el-cee

Hi, I'm back in Italy. It's so beautiful, my higher power is right with me here. Thanks alanon for giving me the courage to live and the eyes to see the beauty. I'm so grateful.x

Helpangel · Helpangel

I did it! I told him that he has chose to drink he has chosen to stop therapy and AA meeting but he is not the only one that is "living with his decision". He has lied to his therapist, he has lied to me and everyone else yet want me to say it is ok and now it's not. I told him I need three months to make su...

giraffe13 · giraffe13

I know progressive memory loss is a symptom of continued drinking. I thought that meant blacking out, and forgetting what they did last week. This past week seemed like it is on a 5 minute interval. One minute he is trying to be nice, the next giving me the cold shoulder and telling me how sick he is of us a...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODA T reading for July 19 speaks about Al-Anon membership. It emphasizes the fact that alanon is a world wide fellowship of people who are working for the same purpose; to build better lives for ourselves and those around us. We do this by positive readings, meditation and prayer and support...

hotrod · hotrod

I had a lovely day yesterday visiting my childhood vacation home. Here is a picture of my sister and I at the carousel that we rode oh so many years ago. "MEMORIES"

catlover26 · catlover26

Tonight when I was at my A's place I wasn't going to discuss an issue with him but I decided to anyway. Over the past 6 mos or more the affection between us has decreased on his part really. Not to go into details really but I was uncomfortable around December something we were doing and I decided we should s...

cloverleaf · cloverleaf

Hey everyone. I've been lurking here for several weeks, reading posts and attending online meetings. I've now attended a few face to face meetings too, but feel I am just barely beginning to understand the basics of the program and how to apply it. My struggle of the moment is - I'm having a hard time wit...

beacheemom · beacheemom

I think my functioning AH is losing it. I really do. No need for details but his short term memory loss is getting worse. He sometimes doesn't even remember doing things. Tonight, it was that he forgot he ordered take out by phone. Me and our youngest come back home shortly after he ordered it and he is mak...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for July 18 speaks about Al-Anon recovery as a long-term process of growth and change. That our efforts to speed up this process will more than likely interfere and we will feel frustrated and depressed. "Easy does it " one day at a time , and "Keep it simple" are...

Bluewater · Bluewater

I served my husband with divorce papers last week. Each and every step of the divorce process has surprised me that instead of relief, I actually feel sadder. I have been married for nearly 2 years. I love my husband very much. I think he loves me too, however I believe he has a drinking problem. I k...

joker · joker

Alcoholic Bf is sleeping after a 2 day bender of 24 hours non stop. 1st night was good. I took some sleep medication and slept. He came into the bed a few times and tried to wake me up but I told him to let me sleep. I guess he had none to listen to his drunk talk. He woke up at 9 am and started drinking again. I trie...

Jmunni29 · Jmunni29

This is my first time sharing on any support group, I find it is needed to try and clear my head. I am a 20 y/o female who is now married and live over an hour away from my parents who are still married. Growing up I have always said that I did not want my father in my life is he continued drinking. Now that I am old...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Today is my 16th anniversary. It had been a long road w a lot of bumps & cracks. But today I still love him even though we disagree a lot & sweat the small stuff sometimes. The program both All anon & AA have taught all of us to accept the things we cannot change including people. It is hard when t...

Helpangel · Helpangel

I am trying to figure out if I have been emotionally and verbally abused and need some clarification. My ah is very negative about everything he can complain and I have asked him repeated to stop but he doesn't. He actually comes to my cubicle after bad meetings and complains to me about how bad they are....

missmeliss · missmeliss

I have a friend over on the side of the world where most of you guys live. Anyway I was having a very black time one day a couple of months ago and I caught her for a chat very early in the morning, in her timezone. She lives in Michigan USA and she said that she was going outside to plant sunflowers with her dau...

Debb · Debb

Have a wonderful day everyone!! {{HUGS}}

deacon · deacon

Annie posted below with the heading. Where have I gone? That has stayed with me for several days now. Because it made me look back and see how I have changed over the years in order to accommodate both husband's and son's drinking. When did I become this person who stays at home most of the time. Not that it...

Carmel 15 · Carmel 15

Hello to everyone here, I am new on this site and have come here as a result of feeling overwhlemed with anxiety on many levels and wondered if any one had some advice or wisdom, which I would welcome so much. My partner of over one year is an alcoholic who has been massively in denial despite many losses in...

norasq · norasq

I was going through some stuff today, and came across this list I'd made of the self-help books I bought as I was struggling with stuff in my marriage and coming to terms with the reality of my AH's drinking problem. It's sort of funny (in an ouch/poignant sort of way) how it sums up the progression and I t...

Debb · Debb

Had to share, that I was sitting on my porch just now, thinking about my yearly mammogram coming up this Wednesday afternoon. Of course, not looking forward to Wednesday, it holds a bit more stress for me because I am a four year breast cancer survivor and while I was praying to my HP for strength and goo...

hotrod · hotrod

Courage to Change reading for July 17 speaks about being detached from others and being able to learn how to be happy whether the alcoholic is drinking or not.It points out that is important for us to keep in mind that we have our own life and our own destiny and it's must be separated from that of the other...

joker · joker

I feel pure anger and rage at my alcoholic bf. In fact I can not stand to be near him. I just hate his guts with a passion. All he does is drink, sleep, work. And now that his brother has passed away, he is really drinking. He flies across the country on Sunday for a week. I can not wait for him to leave. Just to no...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

my AH has gotten us in a terrible financial fix..so ive been taking a new tack. here is what happened today urgent notice from our provider of phone/internet past due/shut off possible. im the user of those things mainly but ah wanted to take care of it . he took out a high credit limet credit card and proo...

almostThere · almostThere

...when I'm going to be perfect? 'Cause I'm getting tired of doing the same ol' thing over and over again! I mean, yeah, my general outlook is way better than it used to be, and yeah, my anger is far better under control than it used to be, and I'm not adding to my resentment warehouse anymore, and yeah, I sp...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	I did it, he is gone! I couldn't wait another second! (Preview) I couldn't hear anymore about him, I just couldn't. I know I wanted to wait till Bulls got paid but I just couldn't. I just got mad when he was talking the usual manipulation games and told him that I couldn't do it anymore. I actually told him to take his stuff and his money and go on a post it note! Yes folks I...	Helpangel	4	701	Jul 24, 2015 by Jozie
	Step One on the Step Board (Preview) We are beginning a new round of the Steps on the Step Work BoardThe first Step has been posted Learn How The Twelve Steps Work. Please join in and share your thoughts Here is the link http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t60562974/step-one-alanon-7-2015	hotrod	2	346	Jul 24, 2015 by The1975jen
	Crazy, Tragic, Sometimes Magic, Awful Beautiful life :) (Preview) Funny how when I look back from where I started to where I am Now, I would like to think I have Moved some Mountains I think Growing up under the thumb of active alcoholics & addicts makes me someone at times I cant even understand When I got to Al-Anon almost 7yrs ago, I was Broken I Couldnt tell you wha...	Jozie	8	554	Jul 24, 2015 by Jozie
	how much detactment? (Preview) I am new to this, but have been going to Al-anon meetings in my area. We haven't heard from our son since his release from a 3 months jail stent for possession of drugs. This has been going on since he was 15, he is now 30. He has stole from us, lied to us, made up stories about us; yet as his mother I kept givi...	PUPPY	7	708	Jul 23, 2015 by Jerry F
	C2C 7-23 (Preview) The C2C reading for today, July 23 speaks about developing/ or reclaiming our sense of humor. It points out that when we first enter the rooms we have lost our ability to see the humor in life as we always seem to view it as chaotic and filled with tragedy and pain. The reading goes on to suggest that the...	hotrod	3	431	Jul 23, 2015 by Hoot Nanny
	Getting Ready for a Challenge (Preview) Hi Everyone! Things are still going well for me, and my AW is still sober and working her AA program, and I am moving closer to finding a sponsor in my face to face group. This weekend, we are going north to the small hunting shack my grandfather built. The foundation is sinking on one side, and the shack...	Skorpi	12	727	Jul 23, 2015 by Iamhere
	overwhelmed with grief today (Preview) Last time I posted, in Feb, I was just moving out from my house. My AH had done the same bad behavior one more time - secretly drinking and then acting aggressively mean to me. I had told him that I would leave if he did that again. So I did. I haven't posted again because I did have support from friends and my...	oceanpine	9	718	Jul 23, 2015 by Mirandac
	Hi, new to this forum (Preview) My daughter is 26, is an alcoholic for some years now. She got clean and was staying with friends in a recovery house. She was walking the walk and talking the talk. I was looking forward to meeting up with her, (as I'd done before), at an AA meeting where she was to receive acknowledgement for staying...	holdemfoldem	11	3602	Jul 23, 2015 by holdemfoldem
	Manipulation (Preview) I just need some positive thoughts and prayers at the moment. My mom is being extremely manipulative and wants us to come to California. All of a sudden now that she realizes we are not moving to California she's going on about how she can't really help. I was counting on her helping and this really pu...	SerenityRUS	5	699	Jul 23, 2015 by Debb
	Love, kindness, honesty and balance (Preview) I've been reading the step 4 section of Paths to Recovery recently as I start my own inventory. The four words that keep coming up are love, kindness, honesty and balance. There are a couple of suggestions about using key words as the backbone of our inventory for example managing, martyrdom, manipul...	hopefortoday29	2	644	Jul 23, 2015 by Debb
	Ultimate Detachment (Preview) Have a wonderful day my friends! {{HUGS}}	Debb	4	1069	Jul 23, 2015 by Jerry F
	ODAT 7-22 (Preview) The ODA T reading for July 22 speaks about the fact that it is a waste of time to attempt to understand the disease of alcoholism by studying books on the disease. It points out that most of us do this because we believe the more information we have, the better we will be able to cope with the disease and...	hotrod	2	434	Jul 22, 2015 by Debb
	It is written. (Preview) I worked up the nerve to text my ex, "I am not comfortable with you being in my house and I don't want it to happen again" The reply I got back was "I needed to be sure our daughter isn't living in a scene from trainspotting" Trainspotting is a 90's cult movie about heroin addicts. Odd...	missmeliss	9	712	Jul 22, 2015 by Iamhere
	Dont know what to do ...DOGS (Preview) So my AexH is in 1/2 way house for now and then possibly some jail time. I take care of our son, and I got his two BIG dogs, by default..... At the time I didnt mind as I knew they would continue to be neglected and not fed or watered as I was only one that did that when I realized he didnt .. He left them in horribl...	sweeetr	4	697	Jul 22, 2015 by Flower49
	Discussion group turned out to be a winner (Preview) last nights face to face was a wonderful thing to behold and feel. The meeting took off as a discussion rather than step 7 and everyone just knew it was right to let it be. the two latest members said more last night than they have said so far in a meeting and we are getting to know them as a group with real unit...	Quakeroat	4	464	Jul 22, 2015 by Jerry F
	Joy and hope gotta have (Preview) if I have learned anything from these FTF meetings, is that life is too short. I get myself wrapped up in who is right or wrong or the insanity conversation that doesn't make any sense. So tired of both. Today I want peace and happiness. Pretty simple stuff but so hard to find each day. It is a hide and se...	Hopeswims22	5	663	Jul 22, 2015 by Jozie
	Seeing A again after months apart--clarity and gratitude (Preview) I don't know if I believe in coincidence in life anymore, and as much as the word manifestation seems silly, it feels real. I had been having a relapse moment the last couple of weeks after some failed romantic flings inspired me to lament my relationship with my A, and wish that I could reconnect with h...	astallaslions	8	582	Jul 22, 2015 by Mike B
	I didn't Bite.... (Preview) The Cycle of Sickness is So Deep in My Family... And I have Slowly Learned the "Carrot & the Stick" Manipulations they have always Strived on.... BUT... I Didn't Bite :D I had Engaged in Conversation with my Older Sis (Currently Dry Drunk) and tho she does not have a Program, I do t...	Jozie	6	643	Jul 22, 2015 by a4l
	Nonsense. (Preview) A and I seem to be doing a really stupid dance. I invite him to come over and spend time with me when daughter is at her dads. He can't make it, every time and then he wants to come over a dew days later when daughter is home and asks a long, boring and predictable string of questions about "aren't we ever...	missmeliss	8	565	Jul 21, 2015 by Jerry F
	Acceptance (Preview) I have found myself being rude when people around me start talking about other people around them. Not that they are talking badly of them, just pointing out what and how they do things contrary to their way and blah, blah, blah. I hate it! I don't want to hear about how someone else parents and how they li...	Breakingfree	6	797	Jul 21, 2015 by hotrod
	Hope for Today. July 21 (Preview) good morning everyone- Today's reading is about unity and how it applies to our alanon groups and our recoveries. For me the power of unity is felt every time I come to this site and read a post that makes me think 'oh yes I have been there' or ' I have felt just like that'. The strength in unity has been fel...	yanksfan51	3	653	Jul 21, 2015 by Iamhere
	Crazy woman in the house (Preview) I was on vacation last week with AH who is currently in recovering and doing well and my parents and brother's family. We were set to all have dinner at my parents house and it ended up getting started late (shocker with four kids under 6 all running around). Well we finally get ready to sit down and eat a...	Jazzie18	6	1043	Jul 21, 2015 by Jill
	Sooo .. LOL .. oh boy .. (Preview) Well it's been a week and rather bore you all with the details of what is and isn't happening in my life .. let's just say .. the kids and I are moving to AZ .. no plan .. yes I'm a little wild that way and yes hoping and praying for the best. This feels so right. I knew when I married my X it was a mistake .. havin...	SerenityRUS	9	893	Jul 21, 2015 by Jozie
	Resisting Change (Preview) We humans don't like change. We like our routines, our ducks to be in a row, and to be secure. Living with an alcoholic rarely gives us that. Even life after the alcoholic has left, rarely gives us that. I have found that I have to be content in the moment. Live for Today. Just for Today. Change is inevitabl...	Overcome	4	638	Jul 21, 2015 by Breakingfree
	What to do? (Preview) AH was sober for 8mos before relapsing. I have forgotten how crazy I get since I went so long. He last few months have been bad. My children and I both afraid of what we may have coming home to us. He likes to argue, I try to not engage and that seems to anger him more. The screaming starts from him, leaving, dr...	Hope2000	14	850	Jul 21, 2015 by Jazzie18
	practice, practice PRACTICE!! (Preview) tried my hand at biscuits this morning the outcome seems more like a ceramic class fail. I haven't tried one of these rocks yet as my wife volunteered to do gravy when she gets home from work. In the mean time I got a response to a text inquiry I made earlier to my daughter. I got an off handed heads up fro...	Jerry F	21	1108	Jul 21, 2015 by Breakingfree
	Gahhhh, so angry :-( (Preview) OK a little back story first. My ex nuisance is a sneaky sort of person who likes to invade people's privacy, gather information and then store it up in case he ever finds a way to benefit from it. I used to say he'd turn in his own mother for a $100 reward and I'm not even joking; he used to routinely spy on an...	missmeliss	32	1129	Jul 21, 2015 by Breakingfree
	Expectations.... (Preview) Where do those come from? If I didn't have any, I wouldn't feel let down or sad - right? So how did they get in my head? I expect the man I marry to do "a", "b", "c" - but why? We never discussed these before we got married. We didn't write up a contract? Yet I hold him to...	LedfootJenny	14	954	Jul 21, 2015 by Breakingfree
	ODAT 7-20 (Preview) The ODAT reading for July 20 speaks about some of the destructive ways in which we attempt to control and manipulate others . It points out that wanting to "know" why the alcoholic drinks or when sober why he does what he does is a question or itch for which there is no scratch. The reading go...	hotrod	4	661	Jul 20, 2015 by vorpal
	money woes! (Preview) I feel like I am in a very old rowboat full of holes,every time I patch a hole a new one appears.That pretty much sums up my financial situation.Every time I think I can breathe a sigh of relief something else goes wrong.Today I have to miss class because of car problems again,grr!I know I really need a sa...	mjferg	10	739	Jul 20, 2015 by catlover26
	New to this (Preview) Good Morning! Thanks for taking the time to read.. I'm not sure if this is the right place for me but I'm not sure where else to turn for support. My story is a long one and probably the same as many of yours so I'm hoping to hear from those who have been or who are where I am right now. Wife and I used to drink...	mericose	4	536	Jul 20, 2015 by Iamhere
	Going to try again with A (Preview) We talked this afternoon and I asked him again what he meant by some of what he said to me because some of it didn't make really any sense. Because of his age, health problems and lack of social contacts what he says doesn't come out right. This can be very difficult to deal with because I usually have to ask...	catlover26	1	480	Jul 20, 2015 by Iamhere
	New to group! (Preview) Hi. I'm new to the group. I have a alcoholic mother. She's Been drinking ever since I can remember (I'm 33 now) and still and constant struggle. over the years my family and I have done different approaches at trying to get mother the help she needs But receently I've fought my own battle with my husband...	Tashaking18	6	551	Jul 20, 2015 by hotrod
	The reality when the relationship is probably over (Preview) I posted last night but I still have so much on my mind. It is so hard after 1 1/2 yrs being with my A that I think it could all be over. He really knows me better and I felt sincere love from him more than my ex of 30 yrs. But after 8 mos things started being like a roller coaster. He also has ptsd so I never could tel...	catlover26	3	420	Jul 19, 2015 by catlover26
	Boundary given (Preview) Good morning everyone. Just a recap my ah after slipping twice and telling me the reason he doesn't stop is because he knows that GOD is disappointed in him for not becoming a minister. I told him that I understand that since he will not forgive himself for this sin and since it is the reason it causes him t...	Helpangel	11	799	Jul 19, 2015 by andromeda
	Grateful today (Preview) I am so grateful today as my Alcoholic BF has left the city to return to his hometown across the county. I feel so happy and relieved not to have his presence around. I feel such relief not having to deal with his selfish behavior. I told him to take his time, even a month to figure out his life and what he want...	joker	2	500	Jul 19, 2015 by Iamhere
	Im serene in paradise (Preview) Hi, I'm back in Italy. It's so beautiful, my higher power is right with me here. Thanks alanon for giving me the courage to live and the eyes to see the beauty. I'm so grateful.x	el-cee	5	446	Jul 19, 2015 by Iamhere
	Follow on to boundary given- we have plans of him moving out (Preview) I did it! I told him that he has chose to drink he has chosen to stop therapy and AA meeting but he is not the only one that is "living with his decision". He has lied to his therapist, he has lied to me and everyone else yet want me to say it is ok and now it's not. I told him I need three months to make su...	Helpangel	3	489	Jul 19, 2015 by Iamhere
	progressive memory loss? (Preview) I know progressive memory loss is a symptom of continued drinking. I thought that meant blacking out, and forgetting what they did last week. This past week seemed like it is on a 5 minute interval. One minute he is trying to be nice, the next giving me the cold shoulder and telling me how sick he is of us a...	giraffe13	10	709	Jul 19, 2015 by Jerry F
	ODAT Reading 7-19 (Preview) The ODA T reading for July 19 speaks about Al-Anon membership. It emphasizes the fact that alanon is a world wide fellowship of people who are working for the same purpose; to build better lives for ourselves and those around us. We do this by positive readings, meditation and prayer and support...	hotrod	1	475	Jul 19, 2015 by Debb
	Yesterday (Preview) I had a lovely day yesterday visiting my childhood vacation home. Here is a picture of my sister and I at the carousel that we rode oh so many years ago. "MEMORIES"	hotrod	16	647	Jul 19, 2015 by Lyne
	My A boyfriend blaming too much on me (Preview) Tonight when I was at my A's place I wasn't going to discuss an issue with him but I decided to anyway. Over the past 6 mos or more the affection between us has decreased on his part really. Not to go into details really but I was uncomfortable around December something we were doing and I decided we should s...	catlover26	4	567	Jul 19, 2015 by hotrod
	overreacting? (Preview) Hey everyone. I've been lurking here for several weeks, reading posts and attending online meetings. I've now attended a few face to face meetings too, but feel I am just barely beginning to understand the basics of the program and how to apply it. My struggle of the moment is - I'm having a hard time wit...	cloverleaf	17	968	Jul 18, 2015 by almostThere
	what is going on w the short term memory loss? (Preview) I think my functioning AH is losing it. I really do. No need for details but his short term memory loss is getting worse. He sometimes doesn't even remember doing things. Tonight, it was that he forgot he ordered take out by phone. Me and our youngest come back home shortly after he ordered it and he is mak...	beacheemom	9	686	Jul 18, 2015 by Fairlee
	C2C 7-18 (Preview) The C2C reading for July 18 speaks about Al-Anon recovery as a long-term process of growth and change. That our efforts to speed up this process will more than likely interfere and we will feel frustrated and depressed. "Easy does it " one day at a time , and "Keep it simple" are...	hotrod	2	487	Jul 18, 2015 by Iamhere
	Divorce process and crazy (not wishful) thinking (Preview) I served my husband with divorce papers last week. Each and every step of the divorce process has surprised me that instead of relief, I actually feel sadder. I have been married for nearly 2 years. I love my husband very much. I think he loves me too, however I believe he has a drinking problem. I k...	Bluewater	13	835	Jul 18, 2015 by pinkchip
	Insane words of alcoholic just do not end (Preview) Alcoholic Bf is sleeping after a 2 day bender of 24 hours non stop. 1st night was good. I took some sleep medication and slept. He came into the bed a few times and tried to wake me up but I told him to let me sleep. I guess he had none to listen to his drunk talk. He woke up at 9 am and started drinking again. I trie...	joker	3	529	Jul 18, 2015 by pinkchip
	Dealing with an enabling mother and an alcoholic father and his rapid decline. Alcoholic father daddy's girl ACA ACOA enabling (Preview) This is my first time sharing on any support group, I find it is needed to try and clear my head. I am a 20 y/o female who is now married and live over an hour away from my parents who are still married. Growing up I have always said that I did not want my father in my life is he continued drinking. Now that I am old...	Jmunni29	6	6571	Jul 18, 2015 by hotrod
	16 years (Preview) Today is my 16th anniversary. It had been a long road w a lot of bumps & cracks. But today I still love him even though we disagree a lot & sweat the small stuff sometimes. The program both All anon & AA have taught all of us to accept the things we cannot change including people. It is hard when t...	Hoot Nanny	7	532	Jul 17, 2015 by hotrod
	Emotional and verbal abuse (Preview) I am trying to figure out if I have been emotionally and verbally abused and need some clarification. My ah is very negative about everything he can complain and I have asked him repeated to stop but he doesn't. He actually comes to my cubicle after bad meetings and complains to me about how bad they are....	Helpangel	3	704	Jul 17, 2015 by Debb
	On a brighter note (Preview) I have a friend over on the side of the world where most of you guys live. Anyway I was having a very black time one day a couple of months ago and I caught her for a chat very early in the morning, in her timezone. She lives in Michigan USA and she said that she was going outside to plant sunflowers with her dau...	missmeliss	4	557	Jul 17, 2015 by Debb
	Strong/Miserable (Preview) Have a wonderful day everyone!! {{HUGS}}	Debb	8	733	Jul 17, 2015 by almostThere
	I think somehow I have lost myself (Preview) Annie posted below with the heading. Where have I gone? That has stayed with me for several days now. Because it made me look back and see how I have changed over the years in order to accommodate both husband's and son's drinking. When did I become this person who stays at home most of the time. Not that it...	deacon	8	804	Jul 17, 2015 by almostThere
	Overwhlemed with anxiety as my partner enters rehab. (Preview) Hello to everyone here, I am new on this site and have come here as a result of feeling overwhlemed with anxiety on many levels and wondered if any one had some advice or wisdom, which I would welcome so much. My partner of over one year is an alcoholic who has been massively in denial despite many losses in...	Carmel 15	10	666	Jul 17, 2015 by almostThere
	History of the decline of my marriage to an alcoholic, as evident from my Kindle book purchases (Preview) I was going through some stuff today, and came across this list I'd made of the self-help books I bought as I was struggling with stuff in my marriage and coming to terms with the reality of my AH's drinking problem. It's sort of funny (in an ouch/poignant sort of way) how it sums up the progression and I t...	norasq	7	873	Jul 17, 2015 by giraffe13
	Just Simple A Lovely Sign (Preview) Had to share, that I was sitting on my porch just now, thinking about my yearly mammogram coming up this Wednesday afternoon. Of course, not looking forward to Wednesday, it holds a bit more stress for me because I am a four year breast cancer survivor and while I was praying to my HP for strength and goo...	Debb	13	701	Jul 17, 2015 by likemyheart
	C2C 7-17 (Preview) Courage to Change reading for July 17 speaks about being detached from others and being able to learn how to be happy whether the alcoholic is drinking or not.It points out that is important for us to keep in mind that we have our own life and our own destiny and it's must be separated from that of the other...	hotrod	1	462	Jul 17, 2015 by Iamhere
	Feel Anger (Preview) I feel pure anger and rage at my alcoholic bf. In fact I can not stand to be near him. I just hate his guts with a passion. All he does is drink, sleep, work. And now that his brother has passed away, he is really drinking. He flies across the country on Sunday for a week. I can not wait for him to leave. Just to no...	joker	8	591	Jul 16, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	Giving away the aggravation (Preview) my AH has gotten us in a terrible financial fix..so ive been taking a new tack. here is what happened today urgent notice from our provider of phone/internet past due/shut off possible. im the user of those things mainly but ah wanted to take care of it . he took out a high credit limet credit card and proo...	YARNCRAZY	4	731	Jul 16, 2015 by Iamhere
	Can anyone tell me... (Preview) ...when I'm going to be perfect? 'Cause I'm getting tired of doing the same ol' thing over and over again! I mean, yeah, my general outlook is way better than it used to be, and yeah, my anger is far better under control than it used to be, and I'm not adding to my resentment warehouse anymore, and yeah, I sp...	almostThere	9	785	Jul 16, 2015 by Fairlee
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.