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Help
(Preview)
I realize in Al-Anon we dont offer advice. However, Im in crisis mode. I havent slept in the last 24 hours. My qualifier went on a bender last night. Fortunately, it appears he has left (drove his car and drunk because the rest of the whiskey is gone). I am praying he doesnt come back tonight so I can have pe...
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Hopeful11
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27
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938
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the LAST resort!!!
(Preview)
Hi everyone!!!! its been quite a ride since I was last here... just one trial after another and it was starting to make me ill..The stress was eating me up and i was considering helping me outta this world because I am soooo tired and worn out from the unwanted side of life I sat on the couch and I cried about...
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mamalioness
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21
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936
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Courage to Change 2/6
(Preview)
Good morning MIP. Today's reading discusses distorted thinking and forcing solutions. The writer tells about arriving at Al-Anon, and hearing to not make any major decisions for at least 6 months. The writer really wanted to hear, leave the bum instead, so was dismayed. After waiting, the wri...
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Iamhere
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3
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614
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New ODAT Got Me!
(Preview)
So in Reading My Daily today, I Chose to Read the New "50th Annv. ODAT" and I'm Gonna Share it with ya's :) Jan 30th... Most of us come to Al-Anon for help as a last resort. We've tried everything else. Perhaps we've seen its effects on others; it seems to have worked like magic, and we want some of that! Th...
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Jozie
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5
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721
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Just a few minutes to say hi
(Preview)
Doing well these days. Learning to let go & let God. Sometimes it is very hard to do. Patience is a good tool to deal w the frustration I have lately. I pursue daily to have a conscious contact w my God. I hope I will continue this journey & am able to live in the here & now.
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Hoot Nanny
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5
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568
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Courage to Change February 5
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading from C2C, the author reflects on the Zen Buddhist saying: "When the student is ready, the teacher appears." This saying reminds the author of Alanon's public relations policy based on attraction, not promotion. The author reflects that, although they learned abo...
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Skorpi
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6
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502
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Giving ourselves permission to heal...
(Preview)
One of the numerous reasons why I am a member here- is that we read from Hope For Today. And I read today, from that book, the reading for the 3rd of February. The reading is about a member who had a soft toy chimpanzee... which she still had. And it gave her reflections- strongly- about her bod...
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DavidG
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6
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571
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Feeling Lost
(Preview)
I want to start by thanking everyone here for all their kind words of encouragement and hope. My brother is my qualifier and Im at such a lose as to what to do. Hes been struggling for years and been in and out of rehab. Hes Been involved with A.A. for years. Hes done individual therapy, group therapy , out...
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Jnazarieh
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16
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851
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C2C Reading 2-4
(Preview)
The Courage to Change reading for today speaks about timess when we are sure that God is punishing us. the reading suggests that this is because we lost our image of a loving god. we are reminded ts that when faced with difficult or painful situations our loving God is always available as a...
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hotrod
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5
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474
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Do you still love me?
(Preview)
The question set my heart aflutter which can be dangerous at my age but I chanced it..."Yes I do...always have and always will" and I sat back and enjoyed the moment and feelings. The question came from one of the most beautiful women in my life...my daughter who I was separated from when she was near...
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JerryF
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7
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806
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C2C, 2/3
(Preview)
The reading for Monday, 2/3, talks about the gifts and meaning of serenity. The author learned that serenity was not curing the A, paying the electric bill, or sitting on a mountain top. Serenity gave the author freedom to live their life as fully and passionately as possible. It tapped into an unl...
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Lyne
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5
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467
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What Is/Isn't My Business
(Preview)
I've been reading about minding my own business. The truth is,I really am not sure what is or isn't my business,not just with the A's in my life but with everything and everyone pretty much. ESH please on how to determine when I need to(or should) stick my nose in or not. I'm sure it's not as simple as if s...
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SunnyFrogs
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7
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892
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maybe half way through
(Preview)
As some of you know: I have been writing my life story. I have been doing it since last summer. I thought I would be done by July but on & on it goes. I am about half way there if that is possible. I am so grateful for the memories that I have compiled & hope that when I share it w/ others it will have some i...
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Hoot Nanny
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5
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527
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New Things are Hard... But I'm Trying
(Preview)
A Piece from 50th Anniversary ODAT: When I Say to myself that I'm Going to turn all my problems over to God, this does not give me leave to shirk my responsibilities. Todays' Reminder: When I am Desperate enough to ask for help, I will not expect it to come in the form of easy solutions. I must play a part in s...
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Jozie
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3
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502
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Hope for Today Feb 2
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- The focus of todays reading is how detrimental gossip is for us in recovery. There are several sentences that jumped out at me from todays page: Gossip created a judgmental atmosphere in which I did not feel free to be myself. I have thought (often in hindsight, after having co...
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yanksfan51
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6
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2097
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Today's Message 2/1/2020
(Preview)
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PosiesandPuppies
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3
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409
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You don't have to attend every argument you're invited to.
(Preview)
I'm having a big "pat-my-back" moment this morning. Before Al-Anon, I used to always take the temperature of those around me. If you were happy, I was happy. If you were sad, I was sad. If you were grumpy, I'd freak out and think it's my fault, and sometimes I'd even get grumpy and defensive. At the same ti...
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Aloha
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12
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743
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Struggling in Old Habit that Just Wont Go Away!
(Preview)
One thing I Seem to Always Go Back to When I'm Ready for a "Poor Me" Moment, I Tend to Run Head First in Shame & Guilt... When things are Good, I tend to Do OK in this Department...I Stay Strong in my Program, and in Balancing things in Life... The Moment that I Get Overwhelmed, the Moment My Feelings ge...
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Jozie
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15
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558
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Step 12... gossip and criticism...
(Preview)
Hi y'all, I have just been in a deep and intense family situation with my cousins and extended family. I realise that Alanon has taught me good boundaries- "...let there be no gossip or criticism of each other... " ... ... Chinese whispers can kill a family- lies and half truths. Even truths, if...
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DavidG
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3
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565
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Hope for Today - January 31
(Preview)
In this January 31 reading, the author shares an interpretation of Tradition One to mean that "unity" includes coming to meetings even when life is going well. Unity meant that when the author shared irrational thinking, the people in the room offered a hug instead of telling them to shape up. Ins...
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Freetime
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4
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563
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My week...
(Preview)
a space for me... not read by many... like an early meeting, early on the journey... where people sit on the edge of the seat- waiting for their turn to share... and the other stuff seeps in around the edges... ...stimulating the taste-buds for learning... I had to taylor my talks about not bein...
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DavidG
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2
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470
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The Alanon opening...
(Preview)
I have heard it thousands of times, and said it hundreds of time... the regular opening. It is not cast in steel or bronze. Over time it might change- and a lot of things change. Alanon has district assemblies, and right up to WSO. Ideas come forward all the time and they should. Remits can go before co...
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DavidG
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5
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1623
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Hope for Today Jan 26
(Preview)
Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about how our perceptions influence our feelings. Specifically the writer describes feelings of hurt and anger because of perceptions of the A in his/her life. The writer decided to pray about the anger and asked for a reminder about the spiritual reason f...
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yanksfan51
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4
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339
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Progress, or perfection...?
(Preview)
Howdy, y'all... I find journalling to be very healing. I do all of mine on the laptop, really. I am old enough to recall using those dip pens with inkwells- at school. For the first few years ball-point pens were banned. My dream was to complete the 12 steps- and try and do tradition...
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DavidG
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5
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475
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Courage to Change 1/30
(Preview)
Today's topic includes - One Day at a Time, Easy Does It and Think. The reading suggests that living with alcoholism, we learn that plans could change at any moment as well as the rules. Most of us develop a deep mistrust of everything and everyone as we felt we could count on nothing. Al-Anon shows u...
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Iamhere
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2
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309
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c2C READING 1-28
(Preview)
The C2C Reading for 1- 28 speaks to our motives for attending alanon meetings. The reading suggests that many arrive looking for a " quick fix 'only to find a healrhy way of living, true friends and a supportive. spirituAl network so that is why we keep coming back. Make it a great day
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hotrod
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3
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370
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It is easier to act yourself into a new way of thinking than it is to think yourself into a new way of acting
(Preview)
It is easier to act yourself into a new way of thinking than it is to think yourself into a new way of acting I heard this quote today and really appreciated it. Sometimes, when faced with the enormity of alcoholism, I found it helpful to "act as if". Act as if I trusted God, act as if I'll be okay, act as if oth...
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Aloha
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2
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518
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Courage to Change January 29
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading from C2C, the author reflects on the value of self-expression. The author suggests that, while many of learn the importance of self-expression in Al-Anon, there is a difference between self-expression and using words to control others. The author helps themselve...
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Skorpi
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4
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400
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What I Learned From Contacting His Doctor
(Preview)
This is just an update from my last thread about whether I should contact AH's doctor about his prescription abuse... He had a follow up appointment with her. He didn't mention that I had contacted her but it was fairly obvious she had told him. I'm not sure what "really" got said but hubby's version wa...
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SunnyFrogs
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22
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906
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'Why Do I Act as Though He Were Willfully Bad?'
(Preview)
When I found AlAnon I was full of anger, resentment, poor speech and actions. I thought I was justified because the A in my life was not able to control their drinking. AlAnon challenged me to consider the thought in today's (1/24) ODAT reading: 'If I have heard and accepted that I and the A are both power...
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Enigmatic
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8
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762
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Celebrating 12 years
(Preview)
I celebrated 12 years in the program this weekend. It's amazing how far I've come, and the love and support Al-Anon gives me is why I keep coming back. During the weekend I was doing some re-organizing on my bookshelf. I keep my old journals on my bookshelf as I often refer back to them while I do step work....
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Aloha
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10
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709
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Needing support
(Preview)
I was married to an abusive (in every way possible) alcoholic for 15 years. It took a very old friend of mine to help me realize that I was worth more than what I had been told for so long. One of my children ended up being an addict, not only because of his bio-dad's genetics but because of my ex-husband be...
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lynn0628tammy
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11
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1596
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C2C, 1/27
(Preview)
The reading for Monday, 1/27, speaks about alternatives to over-reacting, being a martyr, focusing on being disrespected, and trying to solve everything all at once. The writer talks about learning to take things at face value, and deal with one situation at a time. Reminder: Why do I allow myse...
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Lyne
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4
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400
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Al Anon Service Tool #6 - Cross-Talk & Loving Interchange
(Preview)
http://www.alanon.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/Service-Tool-6-Cros...
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Debb
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16
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2901
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From help into hope...
(Preview)
I look at my old world- and the pointlessness, and the pain... and some of this i still carry with me. The people who understand me best- are people like me. I needed this guidance, and this company- companionship. I look over the message board here this morning- with pride- and relief. Hope and h...
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DavidG
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4
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529
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ODAT for 1/25/2020 -
(Preview)
The ODAT for the day speaks about filling the void left when we remove bad or compulsive habitswith the opposite or good habits. The secret is to replace the I Will Not" with "I Will". The reminder, per the ODAT, is that if we are unhappy and critical, that we should seek out what is good and pleasing in o...
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Debb
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4
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423
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C2C, January 24
(Preview)
The reading for January 24 is about honesty with ourselves. The author has been tempted in the past to smile, make excuses, cancel plans, not make waves -- all in an attempt to please another person. Now, they dare to be their authentic self They will not pretend about their real feelings or about wh...
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Freetime
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4
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504
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Just did it and what a relief!
(Preview)
Just blocked my "qualifier"'s # for calls and texts.
I can't control my qualifier's behavior (sending me repetitice abusive, accusative, blaming texts or calling me when drunk/high)
but I can take charge of my sanity by stopping texts from showing up on my phone,
and I can keep my qualifiers call...
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lgnutah
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9
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2885
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So frustrated: having heart and BP issues
(Preview)
Hello everyone! How are you all? I am doing well except for some heart problems I have been having, mainly high blood pressure. I started having this issue about 8-12 weeks ago and then I had an episode of SVT (supra ventricular tacchycardia....SP?) where my pulse rate was at 180 for about 6 hours. M...
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andromeda
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7
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641
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Grandiosity & Addiction
(Preview)
Been thinking about this behavior and how I had to come to terms with it, in relation to the A's addiction. It was by far one of the more difficult issues, for me, that I had to overcome, because of the demeaning impact it had on my life. I read that ... "It is common for substance abusers to share certai...
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Debb
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4
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557
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"Group Inventory" and "Traditions" for Group Participation
(
1 2
)
(closed)
(Preview)
It was suggested that a group inventory maybe beneficial for MIP by 2HP and so here it is!! I am editing for clarity, that I asked Betty first and she gave her blessings to try this for our membership.The Traditions summarize the Al-Anon principles that have proven to help Al-Anon groups function eff...
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Debb
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41
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6264
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Martyrdom
(Preview)
I'll define "martyr" before I move on with my post. The dictionary defines martyr in a couple of ways, but the way I'm interested in is "a person who displays or exaggerates their discomfort or distress in order to obtain sympathy or admiration." I was thinking about martyring the other day after a con...
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Aloha
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8
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1765
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Worried about finances...
(Preview)
Ugh! i know there is a solution here. It feels like our money is just slipping through our hands. We had no retirement savings- so 16 years ago we set up a small business. This has gone well- gives us plenty of activity. It is old stuff for me- to ever having enough as a kid. This struck me most with our co...
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DavidG
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5
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540
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Courage to Change 1/23
(Preview)
Good morning MIP and Happy Thursday! Today's reading is about Step 3 - Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. The writer shares that before Al-Anon, others were allowed to decide how one should live, where one should go and do! The reading continues...
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Iamhere
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3
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620
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Courage to Change January 22
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on their experience learning "detachment with love" - the alcoholic in their life was a restless sleeper who frequently fell out of bed. The author was in the practice of getting up, and helping the alcoholic back into bed. After several AlAnon mee...
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Skorpi
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5
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418
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The unknown
(Preview)
I am not really sure where to begin. I guess the biggest question is, where do I fit into his whole recovery and treatment. I am not sure if I fit in at all, or what will happen. I am not even sure what I even am to him. I can't even really say what he is to be because his alcoholism made it so our relationshi...
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Katie55
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14
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853
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Just to clarify..
(Preview)
I want to let everyone to know who read & commented on my last post, My bonus mom is no longer living. My biological mom is still alive. I am not sure if you all knew what I meant. It is just that I wanted to honor my step-mom. I guess it doesn't really matter who she was, I love her. Right now I am actually co...
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Hoot Nanny
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0
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384
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My share for today...
(Preview)
Hi y'all... ... I had a bit if a down day yesterday. Was triggered by events from the late 80's. I believed that I was railroaded by a couple of doctors- at the treatment centre I was at- as a family member. Sometimes I think- okay- they must have been right. And other times I belie...
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DavidG
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0
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355
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C2c reading 1-21
(Preview)
he Courage to Change reading for today, 1-21 addresses the necessity of taking care of ourselves even if we are busy caring for others, it points out that we cannot abandon our needs and must focus on our feelings and life The reading suggests that we take time to listen to our body,mind and soul a...
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hotrod
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5
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405
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My live in boyfriend is abuseive
(Preview)
Hi. Trying to make some friends here
My boyfriend abuse is escalating.
I don't have the strength to call the police
Yet. He has a warrent. Easy right.
No. Anyway I'm in shock after more
Of his yelling,and leaveing me ofcoarse.
My worst trigger. He is totally heartless
When he is like this. Reall...
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Beckon2
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17
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4577
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Our dreams, and goals...
(Preview)
Hi y'all... ... I was a brainy kid- with great hopes and dreams. I read and worked and read some more. In the classroom I seemed to daydream a lot. Out side of Alanon i do a lot of research and study- and a lot of it online. I read this morning that having big dreams and plans ahead- is just as healthy as r...
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DavidG
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2
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447
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Our Group Conscience
(Preview)
© Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, IncGroup Conscience: What Is It? Tradition Two tells us that "for our group purpose there is but one authority--a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants--they do not govern." But what is a group consc...
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Debb
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3
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468
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Meetings
(Preview)
Wondering what happened to the meetings? No one is there.
Don't know if it's my phone or what?
Thank you,Silgirl
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Beckon2
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3
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400
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It has been a while!!
(Preview)
Greetings to everyone! Hope everyone is doing well and thriving!! It has been quite a while since I last posted. Not much has changed on the home front other than I am fully retired now and boy does it feel great to look out the window at the falling snow and not have to deal with the car and roads!! Bee...
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Debb
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20
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2054
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Let It Begin With Me!
(Preview)
Let It Begin with Me When anyone, anywhere reaches out for help, let the hand of Al-Anon always be there, and Let It Begin with Me. Saw this and wanted to share! It made me smile! Blessing to all!!
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Debb
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8
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1112
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C2C, 1/20
(Preview)
The reading for Monday, 1/20, discusses the reasons for having anonymity the spiritual foundation of all our Traditions. The author suggests we can put aside what we are and begin to know who we are. The author says we even need to extend anonymity to the alcoholic. The results of anonymity allow f...
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Lyne
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3
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391
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Hope for Today Jan 19
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading describes alanon in terms of the power in hearing shares from others, in being heard when ready to share, and knowing that what we say will be received without judgement and with compassion. As I was reading this page, I thought about alanon being layered in a sen...
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yanksfan51
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5
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428
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An attitude of gratitude...
(Preview)
An attitude of gratitude does change the mind-set over time. And maybe even the body chemistry, which is a bonus. I used to say- "went from the paralysis of analysis to an attitude of gratitude." I used to formulate solutions in the thinking department- but had extreme difficulty putt...
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DavidG
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6
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1062
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Step 10 and gratitude...
(Preview)
Hi y'all... it is sweltering hot here- summer has come at last! After doing the steps 6 or 8 times, I think becomes second nature, in the end... a sort of please~sorry~thanks~ routine. This weekend my SO and I went to a rowing regatta. Well rowing is a sort of elite sport... and yes, we ha...
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DavidG
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4
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499
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ODAT for 1/18/2020
(Preview)
Today's ODAT reading reminds us about the importance of Anonymity, which is in two of the Traditons" of Al Anon: 11. Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio, films, and TV. We need guard with s...
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Debb
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4
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384
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