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things are calming down...
(Preview)
Things are finally calming down. My last post was awhile ago because I didn't want to temp fate. My former MSW was in a car accident that killed his son & left him pretty banged up. So, the thing is that I cried the Friday after it happened & was sure that he wouldn't make it. He seems to be doing OK. I...
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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2919
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Hope for Today Aug 18
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about how many of us who have lived with alcoholism have experienced shame and guilt. Shame being more about our inner selves (thoughts and feelings) and guilt having to do with our outer selves (words and actions). This page not only acknowledges how com...
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yanksfan51
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4
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1422
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C2C, 8/26
(Preview)
The reading for today discusses how we could not have known what was happening. Denial is a major symptom of this disease, and one possibility is to just blame the A. We invent ways to survive the constant crises, broken promises, lost hopes, and embarrassments. Sometimes we deny the unpleasant,...
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Lyne
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1
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2876
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Courage to Change 8/22
(Preview)
Greetings all. Today's reading in courage is about what motivates our choices and our discovery process of authenticity in recovery. The writer comes to understand that fear ruled their life - Fear of saying No, Fear of showing hurt/anger, fear of being confused - and more - all held deep inside wh...
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Iamhere
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6
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2940
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New direction ..
(Preview)
So my XAH will not email me back, I literally sent one line about Follow up - Can I get an update, surgeries, child support and so on. Thanks. What I wanted to say was a whole different issue .. LOL. I have a very sneaking suspicion that the whole coming out discussion was not what my son shared .. he's ve...
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SerenityRUS
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2
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2591
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Hope for Today, August 23 - Sponsorship
(Preview)
Today's reading is about sponsorship. The author finds joy and recovery in being a sponsor. It is a privilege to hear what a sponsee shares and to see their growth, which is a reminder of the author's progress too. The sponsee's difficulties also provide an opportunity for the sponsor to do some se...
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Freetime
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4
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1987
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The power of our literature
(Preview)
I did my practice of reading the pages of the day and taking my time with it rather than just scan and run. As I have often been I am impressed with this tool of recovery in my life!! I have often felt that we have an army of gifted mentally and spiritually endowed family members right at my elbow to re-enf...
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JerryF
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2
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1760
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Newbie Here - Adult Child Alcoholic
(Preview)
Hello, I am new to this forum. I am at a loss. I have an adult daughter who drinks nearly daily and doesnt stop until she passes out every time. This has been going on for years and the past year she physically gets sick from drinking, but that doesnt make her stop. Ive helped her financially, emotionally,...
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Irene66
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3
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1318
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Today's Hope August 21
(Preview)
Hello MIP! Today's Reading in Today's Hope is about un-abling. The author shares that it is not helping their child if they do things for him or her that he or she can and should do for themself. By diminishing expectations for the child, the author is diminishing the child's capabilities. Un-ablin...
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Skorpi
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5
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521
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And more is revealed ..
(Preview)
So .. it's been determined that my X is still in crazy land and keeps sending that train to come pick me up .. I'm very grateful for this program that I do not have to pick up the rope. I'm not sad to have missed the train, it places in me in a very weird position of observer to this. There are so many dynamics t...
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SerenityRUS
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8
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608
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Tools for my daughter's wedding needed
(Preview)
HA! Who knew that I would need a tool kit for my daughter's wedding in a few weeks! It has been a year of "stuff" from her future in-laws that she tried so hard to dump on me. It has been a year of growth for me and quite a bit of growing pains as I bloom more into my authenticity. ... as I say "no" if something do...
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bud
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10
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3173
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ODAT Reading 8-20
(Preview)
The ODAT reading for today 8- 20 speaks about minding our own business and keeping the focus on ourselves. It talks about a member whose hubby joined AA who then assigned herself the task OF attending meetings with him. The reading suggests that at this point it does seem like a child thinking t...
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hotrod
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7
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395
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Good focus, good boundaries
(Preview)
My A believes she no longer needs help and that includes our couples' counseling with an addiction-trained therapist. In the past I have insisted her getting help is a condition of our staying together. Today I told her it is her decision. This is huge progress for me, thanks to program. I do not ha...
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Lyne
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8
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739
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Newbie here!
(Preview)
Hi there, I am obviously new here and to the whole idea of Al-anon. I went to a local group (6 people) just over a year ago and attended one meeting. Decided it wasn't for me as it felt like they were implying my friend (It's complicated) was bad and needed to not be in my life (impossible). I felt uncomforta...
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PinkInk
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15
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4007
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C2C, 8/19
(Preview)
The reading for Monday, 8/19, talks about not be able to trust the one you love. It caused the author disappointment of broken promises, contradictions, and outright lies. But they began to realize that most of the heartache came from their own refusal to accept reality. The author started learn...
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Lyne
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4
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1462
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Update :)
(Preview)
Still tired and still adjusting to what's going on. My youngest went back to school and unfortunately I behaved like a responsible adult and not that it's bad that I did that however he heard no and that didn't go over well. That child hears no and OMG you would think the world would end big time. The bi...
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SerenityRUS
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13
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4021
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To my dearest Al-Anon Family....
(Preview)
Been gone 2 months with only my wife's laptop to check into the group and not being able to let you all know I was doing it almost daily and often multiple times daily. I would not dismiss the ESH I get here so I did the best I could with what I had which resulted in me lurking and??? Now I am home late at night...
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JerryF
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6
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1945
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Today's Daily 08/15/19
(Preview)
I am subbing today for Iamhere. Thank you for allowing me to be of service. Today's Daily is from "The Language of Letting Go," by Melody Beattie and discusses Leaving Room for Feelings: "We need to allow enough room for others and ourselves to have and work through our feelings. We are people, not robo...
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PosiesandPuppies
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3
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3920
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Courage to Change, 8/16 -- Self Care!
(Preview)
Today's page talks about the importance of self-care, especially when we are in a crisis and think we do not have time for it. In times of crisis we need to be at our best. That is why we have to strengthen ourselves with good food, sleep, exercise, spiritual contact, emotional support. Reminder: "I am...
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Freetime
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4
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2248
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ESH on boundaries.
(Preview)
Ok lovely family. I don't know how familiar this is so I'd like to put it out there for some help. I am at a stage now where I excitedly feel like I've reached the middle ground between all or nothing. And accordingly I want to try and put the pieces of my puzzle together. Because this is both new and old, I am a...
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a4l
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7
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3988
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Courage to Change August 14
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading from Courage to Change, the author shares that, since coming to AlAnon, they have become aware of choices that they never knew they had. The author now realizes that if the are uncomfortable with something, they don't necessarily HAVE to do it! Of course, the author ref...
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Skorpi
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5
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3474
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The end of a 21 year relationship with an "a"
(Preview)
Yesterday was Easter a day of Celebration for Christians however, I cried so much yesterday that today my eyes will barely open. You see, my husband walked out after 21 years together. He says he doesnt want to fight any more. Yet we werent fighting. He says that he is working on staying sober and I am...
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Tammy
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9
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2019
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i'm sooo tired ..
(Preview)
I think I'm more tired today than I was yesterday we are done with the yearly trek until next year I hope. My X is absolutely in rare form and I am over it. I am trying to stay in my own hula hoop and mind my business I won't lie .. I did break out the bedazzled horns and adjusted them to make sure they still fit .....
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SerenityRUS
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6
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2878
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Did something for me :-)
(Preview)
For years I've been wanting two things: a massage and excercise.
I've snuck in jogs here and there, did a lot of walking with the kids etc.
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a4l
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7
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2849
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Still human still capable of biting.
(Preview)
Good morning all!
I have chosen to embark on a pathway to positivity. Choosing not to dwell on the past, not to always look at the half empty glass, but to focus on the positives and keep looking up.
At the same time, to allow myself to remain positive, boundaries and good people around me are so very nec...
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a4l
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9
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3671
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ODAT Reading 8-13
(Preview)
the ODAT reading for Tuesday 8-13 speaks about dwelling on the past. It suggests that by so doing, we are thereby reopening old wounds. The reading challenges us to slowly examine all that is troubling us today to determine if they have any true validity and suggests using alanon tools to help us...
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hotrod
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5
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738
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C2C, 8/12
(Preview)
The reading for Monday, 8/12, proposes that we can feel relief through the sense of surrender when we truly take the 3rd Step. To turn our will and our lives over to the care of God, we are accepting the limits of our own understanding. We will not always know what is best for other people and even oursel...
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Lyne
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5
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1751
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Group Name
(Preview)
Good evening, I am new here but not new to the program. I'm starting a new group in my town and looking for suggestions on a group name that is appealing and follows the guidelines set out. Thanks in advance for any suggestions!
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mamajo70
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4
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2301
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How much to tell children?
(Preview)
I have two kids, 9 and 12. I have not had a discussion with them about AH's drinking. My counselor (whom I have not seen in over a year now as she was in a different location) told me that "children see and know all". While I don't doubt that, I have not found the guts to come out and talk to them about dad's beh...
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Fedora
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10
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1696
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Hope for Today Aug 11
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about the unique support of alanon. Alcoholism is an isolating disease, so realizing that there is a place where people come together to share their stories is a comfort. There is a sentence on this page that describes the 12 steps as something which, when ta...
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yanksfan51
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4
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1545
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God grant me....
(Preview)
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.... Some days are really hard accepting my A...and today is one of those days, Lyne
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Lyne
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5
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3305
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Out of the blue . . . .
(Preview)
I guess I'm one of those "fair weather friends" here, cause when things are going well for me (regarding my adult son), I'm pretty carefree - I've offered a few thoughts here to others dealing with stuff, and I go to FTF meetings, but I forgot that this Al Anon preparedness stuff is like exercise - if ya st...
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texas yankee
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14
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4065
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I feel so sick!
(Preview)
I am feeling so sick to my stomach! I have to learn that you don't mix certain things together one after the other! I need to practice more self-care. I am not doing things the a way I had been when I reached my goal weight. I had 30 or so lbs. to goal. It was so hard but I tried to use the program & my common se...
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Hoot Nanny
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5
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1997
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C2C, August 9 -- Being Myself
(Preview)
Has the author of today's page been spying on my life? Like me, they always felt they could not be their true self when around other people. Tried to be what others thought they should be, in fear that people would not accept them as they truly are. In Al-Anon they saw that many others shared the same prob...
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Freetime
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7
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426
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Courage to Change 8/8
(Preview)
Good morning MIP family! Better late than never.....Today's Courage to Change discusses Step Six. This step suggests our lives will undergo great change, and many of us fear nothing will be left if we shed our characteristics that helped us cope. Many have fear of the unknown, yet if we've worked...
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Iamhere
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2
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1406
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update just an ordinary day!
(Preview)
I could not ask for a day like today w/o praising my God! I am so grateful. Ordinary fits on a day where there is no pressure! I thought the day would be so difficult because of the nature of my involvement on a particular study. The topic was anger. One of the 12steppers was of the group. It wasn't Al anon at a...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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1688
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Courage to Change August 7
(Preview)
Today's reading in Courage to Change speaks about steps 10, 11, and 12. The author shares that they have often heard of these steps as "maintenance steps," but the author likes to think of them as growth steps- steps that let the author continue to challenge themself. The author tested the theory that...
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Skorpi
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4
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1194
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From HotRod - Courage to Change 8/6
(Preview)
Greetings all. Being of service, and posting the daily for tomorrow from Hotrod! The C2C reading for Tuesday, August 6 speaks about the feeling of being trapped in a burning building. It points out that ae stroing handis . Behind the flames and becons to me beckoning come through the dor. We kne...
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Iamhere
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2
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1959
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A gratitude share.
(Preview)
I am really grateful today for all the love in my life. The alanon program I feel has been like taking a stroll with a wisdom beyond myself, where everything I've struggled with emotionally, mentally and spiritually, has been lovingly broken down for me, into easy to understand parts with practice ex...
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a4l
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2
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1105
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Parenting ..
(Preview)
Ok .. so as we ALL know as practicing parents .. this stuff is HARD. LOL!! One of the hardest not fun moments has been the whole letting go stuff. Letting go of gender expectation, letting go of enabling, letting go of the children I see as I watch them become struggling young adults (that's the hardes...
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SerenityRUS
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0
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2383
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We made it ... LOL
(Preview)
Well the first leg of the trip is done and we will do it again next week. We had such a good time. The kids are where they are suppose to be at the moment. Our trip out involved a trip to Lambert's if you are in the area it's a must go to. After having a great time there we went and met up with my friends and had su...
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SerenityRUS
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5
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3435
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C2C, 8/5
(Preview)
The reading for Monday, 8/5, talks about how resentment can poison all your waking hours. The author could hold resentments for days or years! Since alanon, the author can feel their feelings, but does not have to rehearse and review the list of grievances. The writer tries to use their energy for...
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Lyne
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4
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384
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Sadness amongst happiness
(Preview)
Hi MIP family-Lately I am doing well, happy, coping well, and of course there are ups and downs. Today I have learned that a former colleague and friend is in the hospital. He has pancreatic cancer and was doing well until a tick bite came along. His prognosis is quite guarded. And my 14 year old dogg...
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Lyne
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5
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1982
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Hope for Today Aug 4
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about how many of us have learned not to express our anger, specifically to remain silent (and resentful) instead. The writer describes having grown up in a home with alcoholic parents and violence in the home. Learning that expressing anger equaled abuse...
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yanksfan51
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6
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483
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Awful beautiful life.
(Preview)
It just keeps better & better! My God & i are turning things for the better. I thought it couldn't get better but it has.
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Hoot Nanny
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6
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2886
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How do you gain control with out controlling the alcoholic?
(Preview)
I want to take control of our finances, we are always behind because of AH drinking. We both work full time jobs. AH is the one who brings in the most money. I want to be able to get things caught up, some in savings and start saving for our future, but how can I do that without taking control of AH drinking? We...
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Lindie
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11
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3866
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Step 8 posted to Step Board please join in and share yourESH
(Preview)
Work.https://stepwork.activeboard.com/t65766784/alanon-step-8-8-1-2019/
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hotrod
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2
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1939
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ODAT, August 2 - Live and Let Live
(Preview)
Today's page in One Day At a Time in Al-Anon shows how much wisdom is condensed in the slogan Live and Let Live. The slogan tells us first to Live -- fully, richly, taking joy in what we do. The next part -- Let Live -- is more difficult because it calls on us to accept the right of all other human beings to liv...
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Freetime
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5
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3263
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My Miracle in Progress- An Update
(Preview)
Hi All! I just wanted to drop by here with an update. It's been awhile since I've checked in because I've been a bit busy! I got married last month to a wonderful man who is an amazing partner. We met online three and half years ago, neither of us with a plan to ever get married again. But you never know where...
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Green Eyes
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4
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1561
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A Love Story...
(Preview)
~sigh~ I made this couple my mum and dad... I believed in them. Lois was most likely the better behaved. Bill had feet of clay... not angel's wings... but he rose from this... ... I visited their home once- in up-state New York... and had this tremendous sense of family. That I had sisters and brothe...
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DavidG
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6
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2541
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Courage to Change 8/1/19
(Preview)
Good morning MIP - Happy August! Today's reading is primary about the three C's we learn in Al-Anon. We did not cause alcoholism, we can't control alcoholism and we can't cure it either. The writer, like so many came to Al-Anon to learn how to get a loved one to stop drinking. The writer had hopes tha...
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Iamhere
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2
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2355
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Lies & Deception....
(Preview)
Just a question on how you all deal with the lies and deception from the alcoholic? Im having a very hard time with it. For me its kind of a no brainer that if someone lies and is deceitful with you, then theres really no true relationship, especially in a marriage. How do you continue to be in a marriage whe...
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Elabella
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16
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3374
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I need to find the strength
(Preview)
My AH is changing shifts at work , so now I am going to be around AH more on the weekends. When he worked nights, he would be up until 1pm and get up at 8pm. Now he is going to be up from 3pm until 1 am most likely. I go to bed at 9pm. So there is going to be constant 6hrs around him and the drinking. What am I going to d...
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Lindie
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8
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1536
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God's Timing
(Preview)
Hi, it's Wendy P. I wanted to share about something that happened to me yesterday, and on thinking about it all, I am still amazed at "God's Timing". Even after many years in Alanon, it still can amaze me. On Monday Mornings, I go up town to do my normal Shopping, because I am a planner, had it all worked ou...
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WendyP
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8
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682
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Trying to keep my mouth shut
(Preview)
I'm in process of trying to keep my mouth shut. I am feeling my oats so to speak so therefore have a tendency to speak way more bluntly than necessary. It's a character defect and I am aware of it. Some of it could be the anxiety of the trip. While we planned it out the money is going to be tight to get the ki...
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SerenityRUS
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6
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745
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FOO
(Preview)
hi everyone, im bringing this topic up in hopes i can hear whats helped others in dealing with foo. i did separate myself for a very long time,so that i could heal, im finding that when i talk with foo,i seem to get sucked in like a vaccume, negative talk ,etc,all that goes with being raised in a A home ,no re...
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lookingup
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4
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960
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Courage to Change July 31
(Preview)
Hello MIP! I today's reading in Courage to Change the author speaks about a source of friction that had always existed between the author and their alcoholic loved one: housekeeping. The author shares that they are usually so overwhelmed by all the things that need to be done, that they cannot get org...
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Skorpi
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4
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1621
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C2C reading Tuesday 7-30
(Preview)
Thee C2C reading for Tuesday, July30, my birthday speaks about finding " happiness". The reading suggests that happiness is an 'inside job'and that we cannot be happy all the time but if we are willing to break old habits and work hard to achieve our goal we can change our negative attitudes....
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hotrod
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8
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446
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How do you find a sponser?
(Preview)
I went to my first face2face and left with more questions and left feeling more alone. Do you have to ask for a sponsor, or wait until someone offers to be a sponser? I am going to try another meeting with other people there but that is my question about how to get a sponsor?
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Lindie
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3
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1485
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Our HP works in mysterious ways...???
(Preview)
Howdy y'all, kia ora koutou... Went to my nearest f2f group last night and there were 11 there! last week, there were three of us... This group has a wide catchment of readers- from all over the world. And we do get good quality Alanon here- because of the love and peace of the programme- and because w...
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DavidG
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3
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1412
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