Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

catlover26 · catlover26

I am new and working on Step one. My f2f group is covering each Step every 2 weeks which I think is fast but I know there is much work I will do on my own. I wish I could find more info on the "Step work Board" but I haven't been able to find it. One forum member did give me some excellent questions on S...

Nightingale · Nightingale

Well....after having my moment of clarity a week and a half ago...I have been to three f2f meetings...started reading my c2c again and tonight dug out my old Paths to Recovery book to read up on step one. It was so nice to go back to my home group and see so many familiar faces. To be welcomed back with open a...

catlover26 · catlover26

I am dating an alcoholic 16 yrs older than me. The age difference I do have to take into account with some of his actions but I don't want to make excuses for him. I think with him growing up with a stern mother and being bullied as a child plus the fact he was drinking from ages 18-42 has left him now at age 71 so...

Herbalist13 · Herbalist13

Please forgive me, everyone. Trying not to vent too much but I can't take it anymore. My partner is one year and two months sober and I am very proud of him and his heartfelt fight for sobriety. We love each other very much despite the bumps in our road (right now they feel pretty huge) but I believe we ha...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

missmeliss · missmeliss

When I met my A, I had been on a strict personal program of "financial reform". After being horribly financially irresponsible in my early 20's I had used motherhood as the catalyst for big changes and I learnt to be very conscientious, credit-free and frugal. I found I'm quite good at it an...

Darcy0408 · Darcy0408

I've only been going great to al-anon for a week and 2 days. I have heard so much about how i have no control over my ah'a drinking. 8 days ago it got so scary that I decided to leave. I've never even threatened to leave before and then there he was wanting to try to make it work. I told him that if he would try to q...

Jerry F · Jerry F

The disease progresses in the next generation with my Daughter in law attempting to handle the emotional, mental, spiritual and physical conflict of our disease as manifested by my eldest son. He is everything I've learned about alcoholism over the past 36years of recovery. So is she yet she is s...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Today's HFT opens with the first five words of the serenity prayer, then goes on to consider what the word 'serenity' means. For the writer, serenity is thinking of self and others with honor, respect, reverence due as a child of God. One of my most common 'steps backward' is w...

el-cee · el-cee

Mirandac · Mirandac

i was doing so good in my new apt the last three nights i can not go into deep sleep my xah is in my brain when i am sleeping. i think of him all night tossing and turning. it must be still be part of the process of letting go. I hope it ends, i am tired of all this emotional stuff with him. i am so use to taking care...

almostThere · almostThere

Short on time, but had to share. Went to dinner with the A. Haven't done that in a while. mid-dinner she announced that in 3 weeks she's going to take a trip. I won't get into the details of where or why, but she takes this trip with a family member a few times a year, it's for a good purpose and I don't objec...

softie · softie

Hi,this is my first time here not sure what to do , my problem is I cannot say no to my son who has a drink problem.If he asks for money I give it to him even though I know he will spend it on drink . Why can I not simply say no.

Annie1 · Annie1

I have a very high functioning AH. He pays all the bills except childcare, my gas, groceries and the garbage bill. He goes to work everyday and works anywhere from 50-60 hours a week. He almost never calls in. When he does he is either actually sick or its due to staying up to late and drinking too much...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for July 13 speaks about not being present in our lives or in the present moment because we are too worried about the past or the future. Al-Anon,helps me to see that I have choices about my attitudes. We don't have to see life as a tragedy or torment ourselves with past mistakes or futu...

Helpangel · Helpangel

My ah has been acting mad at the world lately. He was sober this time two months when in the last two weeks I found out he was drinking again. After another weird fight my ah tells me the reason he has slipped twice in the last two weeks is because he knows GOD is disappointed in him bc he missed his opportunit...

hotrod · hotrod

Happy Birthday my Friend .I pray that this day and the following year brings you joy, peace and serenity.

kwas911 · kwas911

After several years of living with an alcoholic, the decision for inpatient treatment was finally realized. Now that my "qualifier" has been in treatment for several weeks, I am beginning to wonder if it will work. The anger continues and even seems to increase. The blame is non stop....

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for July 12 speaks about Tradition five and discusses the importance of the section that suggests that we attempt to:" encourage and understand our alcoholic relatives." This Tradition also defines the purpose of the Al-Anon program. It points out that in order for us...

Overcome · Overcome

Well, the first thing you don't do is get into a relationship with another alcoholic! LOL On a more serious note though, no one can tell you to break up, or not break up with your alcoholic; that is a decision you and only you can make. For me, it was ten long years of trying to make something work that was nev...

andromeda · andromeda

Among other things, my X is giving my son beer and is using our son as a dumping ground for his emotional problems. He throws me under the bus to our son, he bemoans his life and tells our son how depressed he is and how he's a loser, etc. These are all things he did to me and now he's found a new audience. My so...

Scarlet71 · Scarlet71

Hello, I am new to this forum and am hoping someone can give me some help. I have been with my partner for 3 1/2 years now. We live together and have a good relationship. I am supportive of his recovery and do not interfere with meetings, his recovery is his own. I am not in recovery, I do not drink alcohol an...

el-cee · el-cee

I went to an aa convention last night and im blown away, as always, by the honesty and awareness shared by the speakers. The love and understanding and gratitude shown in the room by everyone is brilliant. I think about this disease as one disease, just alcoholism and how it affects everyone. The alcoh...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

when nothing changes and HOLY COW .. NOTHING has changed. I guess if I didn't know that before I totally get it again and it was a God thing telling me be so glad you are out of that mess. My XAH definitely has the attitude if it doesn't slap him in the face he doesn't need to deal with it. Part of the reason ap...

norasq · norasq

I've had a number of rude awakenings this week, and one big one has to do with realizing how much I still need to work on my own recovery. I've been separated from my functioning alcoholic husband for almost 2 years, after a 20+ year marriage. He continues to deny that he has a problem with alcohol, but at...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Yes he was and I'm here to tell on him. HAH!! surprise surprise I thought he was 45 minutes early and then the room was assembled and the fellowship was handling the issue of recovery and no one...not anyone even took notice or issue of my lateness except me. How the hell did this happen...I can neve...

Iamhere · Iamhere

On Tuesday of this week, a 22 year old young mother of one was shot and killed in a nearby city. She was a classmate of my sons, and has had her own struggles with the disease. The last time I saw her, she had brought my son home from a meeting. Now, she is dead, her parents are devastated and this has thrown m...

likemyheart · likemyheart

Sittin in my favorite spot watching the birds hop around the yard because I just mowed then watered. Hummingbirds flitting around. I've even seen a few American Goldfinches - love those yellow birds! Coffee, birdsong, no roosters crowing, no dogs yapping, peaceful sound of water running - I even ha...

Doingmybest · Doingmybest

Hello all, I'm desperately trying to get into the online meeting here, but seem to be somehow lost. I "think" it should be in full swing now, but I logged in to what I thought was the right thing and I am the only one "chatting"... Under the name Gidget. Please help with instructi...

texasgal · texasgal

I've met a man. We have had a good time talking at dinners. It's been nice. He seems nice. I've only had dinner a couple of times with him. My radar is up and I feel like I'm on guard all the time. I'm always looking for red flags when we text or talk. I want to date but I don't know if I'm ready. I feel like maybe I s...

hotrod · hotrod

The July 11 reading in the C2C speaks about dealing with anger. It points out that many times we simply stuff our anger and deny reality or we go off in a fury, directing our feelings outward. Al-Anon encourages us to acknowledge our feelings, to be responsible for how we express them and stop blaming, j...

Green Eyes · Green Eyes

So the topic of tonight's meeting was "Understanding Ourselves." We talked about our various issues as "Alanoners." The meeting leader shared the issues of the need to be in control and to be perfect. And our tendency to be obsessive. And our issues with anxiety. And how somet...

CountryChicMI · CountryChicMI

His drug addiction spiraled out of control over the course of several years that eventually led him to prison. He has been down a few years and being released later this year. He started out on painkillers then went on using Heroin & whatever he could get his hands onMy biggest fear if he goes back t...

wectmall · wectmall

Hi all. I am new here. My DH is a severe alcoholic. He drinks every waking moment that he is not working or sleeping. He drinks before he goes to work. We have an 11 year old son. My dh was a stay at home dad for 10 years. He did not have money to drink then, so he was so much better. He rarely drank, maybe...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I don't know if anyone else goes through this from the AH in their lives. I know that he means well but sometimes I feel like I can't get past the fact that he has been doing these things like saying "the water is on, you left it on!" Simple to me. Why can't he just turn it off & say nothing? He is...

hotrod · hotrod

Dear Ms.M. I pray that today and every day of this year is filed with joy , serenity and love

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

I've really been giving my power away to other people this week. The calls to interview have been coming and I had three this week. One job was more interesting because of location and salary. I managed to make myself physically and emotionally ill in the days building up to the in person interview....

mjferg · mjferg

So my landlady showed up yesterday with papers for me to sign and struck up a conversation with me,we actually talked for quite some time.Turns out she hates what she does,and she is under a lot of pressure from the actual owners of this property.They want things a certain way and she has to do all the dir...

likemyheart · likemyheart

I come home last night from a board meeting and found my daughter in full panic mode - she had spilled HOT ramen soup on her computer and fried it. simple description eh? but what she'd actually done is spill HOT ramen on her thigh and has second degree burns and THAT is my biggest worry. She's only 20 and he...

Mirandac · Mirandac

I take it back, no i am not filled with self pity but i am still grieving and i know i need to move on. In Gods time I will. i am being gentle with myself as best as i can. It is a process and it takes time. I accept i am a different person after the divorce, it changed something so basic inside of me. i love my ne...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for today 710 is a very important one and one that I found difficult accepting early on. It begins by suggesting that when a newcomer enters the room and explains their situation,it is important not to react because often their view of the situation is highly colored by theri confu...

el-cee · el-cee

I am still living with insecurity and doubt, its a nightmare, sucking the joy out of joy. If someone doesn't text back quick enough Im like, what the hell is going on, do they not like me anymore, what does it mean?? Its driving me nuts. Also, what if they find out about my dysfunctional family and the abus...

therinoa · therinoa

Hello, I am a 29 years old. My mother is an alcoholic and I struggled a lot in my childhood because of this. She was verbally abusive to me and my brother the entire time we lived with our parents. My father is a great person and never left her even after her terrible behavior for many years but I have seen the...

JukuVee · JukuVee

i have always been a bit of a clutter bug, but never to the extreme that my AH has taken it. He has managed to trash our entire house and yard except for a few small areas that I rule like the portion of our yard where my koi pond and chickens live, my side of the bedroom and the kitchen, and he refuses to let me g...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODA T reading for July 9 speaks about self-pity and the ability of this particular emotion to entrench itself in our minds and keep us miserable.The reading points out that self-pity comes from concentrating on the negative aspects of life . It then goes on to dissect self-pity and points o...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Tomorrow, as I may have mentioned once or twice, is ABF and my birthday. So after big plans went south we settled on a smaller plan of a movie and dinner and I was having mixed feelings about it, because yes I want to see him but no I don't want to deal with drunky and he's been that guy a lot lately. So on one han...

beacheemom · beacheemom

Good morning all! Last night I tried something a little different w AH. He was buzzing and wasn't in his hyper mood with it but rather seemed a little frustrated. Not alot but just seemed like if he would've drank more b4 going to bed that he would've been in one of those condescending tone drunks. So ever...

mjferg · mjferg

Well some of you know my ongoing saga with a corrupt landlady.I was renting a mobile home from her and decided to buy one in the same mobile home park,She tells people here to only sell to her because she wants the rent and when they don't she gets mad.my thinking was I wouldn't have any more problems with h...

missmeliss · missmeliss

I really had to shake my head tonight and make a decision to do something differently. I'm not sure what or how, exactly, but...something. There's this ridiculous dynamic of dishonesty and game-playing between my myself, my grandmother and my mother and it's so tiring. Here's today's example. My...

giraffe13 · giraffe13

I am going to go to a meeting tomorrow. I don't even know where to start. A year and a half after breaking up with my A ex bf, and somewhat reconciling and touching base in may, we have been spending time together, while he was drinking. (Not drinking around me now and less in general as he now says he has some...

texasgal · texasgal

My ex ah sent me a heated email abt an old Irs tax. He does not want to pay it. I have been paying this tax on a monthly basis to the irs. He got a letter that said they were keeping his refund due to the tax owed. He wants me to pay him the money he is not receiving. Supposedly the at he was to receive was $1000. I hav...

sweeetr · sweeetr

I am blown away that my EXAH passed on so many behaviour issues to our son. For 3 yrs plus We did family counciling, individual counciling, the EXAH continued to lie and grow in addiction. Became unsafe (to even have him come around) hence why he is ex for over a year legally now. Now my 10 yr old is OUT OF C...

bitche1 · bitche1

HI, I am a mother that has an alcoholic son. I live in florida and he lives in MA with his wife and 2 children. My son is a good man, but he drinks on the weekends, withdraws Monday- Tuesday then when Friday comes he drinks all weekend. He is a mean drink, I just got back from a visit and I could not wait t...

joker · joker

I am just sitting her and laughing as I remember what the active alcoholic BF said last week. He was complaining about the amount of money spend on food. He says I only eat 4 dollars a day as I am not home. Since I work night shift and I sleep all day. I am not around to eat. Quit cooking meals and letting food go...

Yankeerose · Yankeerose

Well if all goes smoothly in the real estate world we will be moving out of our home of 11 years at the end of August. We finally found a buyer after 3 months. I think I'm still in shock. My kids grew up in this house so there were many good times. But for all the good times there were three times as many bad livin...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for July 8 speaks about how our mood and attitudes are expressed not only in our words but in the tone and volume of our voices. I also feel is expressed in how we write. I get the sense of your joy from your email and that cheered me. The ODA T reading goes on to suggest that we really lis...

Nightingale · Nightingale

Well I went. It was good and I'm glad I went and I will keep going. Yep...I see now I have officially turned into a wacko again. But that's ok. In fact it's good in a way. Even though I always knew when I was regularly going to meetings before that the program helped me immensely.... In the back of my mind I thi...

Quakeroat · Quakeroat

What a wonderful meeting tradition 5 gave us. Nobody could answer what it meant without reading the tradition out so we changed our agenda and what a blessing that turned out to be. it was a god led meeting from start to finish which fed the newcomer and old timers alike the traditions are rarely that ef...

Debb · Debb

XOXOXO

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

It's the first big deal since I started dating my boyfriend, but I'm seriously hurt and pissed about it. We have been together 16 months and I knew it was bound to happen. Part of me wants to ignore it or even run from this relationship, but I know that's unhealthy thinking. We had my 2 girls and his 2 girls t...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	When to work the Traditions? (Preview) I am new and working on Step one. My f2f group is covering each Step every 2 weeks which I think is fast but I know there is much work I will do on my own. I wish I could find more info on the "Step work Board" but I haven't been able to find it. One forum member did give me some excellent questions on S...	catlover26	2	353	Jul 15, 2015 by catlover26
	Firmly planted in step one...again (Preview) Well....after having my moment of clarity a week and a half ago...I have been to three f2f meetings...started reading my c2c again and tonight dug out my old Paths to Recovery book to read up on step one. It was so nice to go back to my home group and see so many familiar faces. To be welcomed back with open a...	Nightingale	4	716	Jul 15, 2015 by Iamhere
	Trying to accept my boyfriend the way he is (Preview) I am dating an alcoholic 16 yrs older than me. The age difference I do have to take into account with some of his actions but I don't want to make excuses for him. I think with him growing up with a stern mother and being bullied as a child plus the fact he was drinking from ages 18-42 has left him now at age 71 so...	catlover26	3	676	Jul 15, 2015 by hotrod
	Past The First Year And Want To Rip My Hair Out (Preview) Please forgive me, everyone. Trying not to vent too much but I can't take it anymore. My partner is one year and two months sober and I am very proud of him and his heartfelt fight for sobriety. We love each other very much despite the bumps in our road (right now they feel pretty huge) but I believe we ha...	Herbalist13	24	826	Jul 15, 2015 by milkwood
	The Arizona Sky - I am grateful (Preview)	Cathyinaz	13	624	Jul 14, 2015 by Breakingfree
	Tangible rewards. (A long ramble, feel free to ignore) (Preview) When I met my A, I had been on a strict personal program of "financial reform". After being horribly financially irresponsible in my early 20's I had used motherhood as the catalyst for big changes and I learnt to be very conscientious, credit-free and frugal. I found I'm quite good at it an...	missmeliss	12	703	Jul 14, 2015 by Breakingfree
	How do I detach (Preview) I've only been going great to al-anon for a week and 2 days. I have heard so much about how i have no control over my ah'a drinking. 8 days ago it got so scary that I decided to leave. I've never even threatened to leave before and then there he was wanting to try to make it work. I told him that if he would try to q...	Darcy0408	5	690	Jul 14, 2015 by Darcy0408
	Getting past the family... (Preview) The disease progresses in the next generation with my Daughter in law attempting to handle the emotional, mental, spiritual and physical conflict of our disease as manifested by my eldest son. He is everything I've learned about alcoholism over the past 36years of recovery. So is she yet she is s...	Jerry F	3	561	Jul 14, 2015 by hotrod
	Hope for Today July 14 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Today's HFT opens with the first five words of the serenity prayer, then goes on to consider what the word 'serenity' means. For the writer, serenity is thinking of self and others with honor, respect, reverence due as a child of God. One of my most common 'steps backward' is w...	yanksfan51	10	783	Jul 14, 2015 by maryjane
	True (Preview)	el-cee	4	389	Jul 14, 2015 by Debb
	Three nights sleepless (Preview) i was doing so good in my new apt the last three nights i can not go into deep sleep my xah is in my brain when i am sleeping. i think of him all night tossing and turning. it must be still be part of the process of letting go. I hope it ends, i am tired of all this emotional stuff with him. i am so use to taking care...	Mirandac	24	810	Jul 14, 2015 by Hoot Nanny
	A quick birthday ESH (Preview) Short on time, but had to share. Went to dinner with the A. Haven't done that in a while. mid-dinner she announced that in 3 weeks she's going to take a trip. I won't get into the details of where or why, but she takes this trip with a family member a few times a year, it's for a good purpose and I don't objec...	almostThere	7	620	Jul 13, 2015 by maryjane
	cant say no (Preview) Hi,this is my first time here not sure what to do , my problem is I cannot say no to my son who has a drink problem.If he asks for money I give it to him even though I know he will spend it on drink . Why can I not simply say no.	softie	10	743	Jul 13, 2015 by Jerry F
	Where have I gone? AH high functioning kids lost anger hate (Preview) I have a very high functioning AH. He pays all the bills except childcare, my gas, groceries and the garbage bill. He goes to work everyday and works anywhere from 50-60 hours a week. He almost never calls in. When he does he is either actually sick or its due to staying up to late and drinking too much...	Annie1	13	9877	Jul 13, 2015 by Skorpi
	C2C 7=13 (Preview) The C2C reading for July 13 speaks about not being present in our lives or in the present moment because we are too worried about the past or the future. Al-Anon,helps me to see that I have choices about my attitudes. We don't have to see life as a tragedy or torment ourselves with past mistakes or futu...	hotrod	4	536	Jul 13, 2015 by yanksfan51
	Well this is a new one (Preview) My ah has been acting mad at the world lately. He was sober this time two months when in the last two weeks I found out he was drinking again. After another weird fight my ah tells me the reason he has slipped twice in the last two weeks is because he knows GOD is disappointed in him bc he missed his opportunit...	Helpangel	8	622	Jul 13, 2015 by Mattie
	I just heard that "Almost There "has a Birthday today as well (Preview) Happy Birthday my Friend .I pray that this day and the following year brings you joy, peace and serenity.	hotrod	10	597	Jul 13, 2015 by hotrod
	I thought this would be a turning point, for the better! (Preview) After several years of living with an alcoholic, the decision for inpatient treatment was finally realized. Now that my "qualifier" has been in treatment for several weeks, I am beginning to wonder if it will work. The anger continues and even seems to increase. The blame is non stop....	kwas911	3	669	Jul 13, 2015 by almostThere
	C2C 7-12 (Preview) The C2C reading for July 12 speaks about Tradition five and discusses the importance of the section that suggests that we attempt to:" encourage and understand our alcoholic relatives." This Tradition also defines the purpose of the Al-Anon program. It points out that in order for us...	hotrod	6	608	Jul 12, 2015 by hotrod
	How to Break up with an Alcoholic (Preview) Well, the first thing you don't do is get into a relationship with another alcoholic! LOL On a more serious note though, no one can tell you to break up, or not break up with your alcoholic; that is a decision you and only you can make. For me, it was ten long years of trying to make something work that was nev...	Overcome	13	1226	Jul 12, 2015 by Overcome
	X is giving my son beer (Preview) Among other things, my X is giving my son beer and is using our son as a dumping ground for his emotional problems. He throws me under the bus to our son, he bemoans his life and tells our son how depressed he is and how he's a loser, etc. These are all things he did to me and now he's found a new audience. My so...	andromeda	10	677	Jul 12, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	Dealing with the women in my partner's AA group (Preview) Hello, I am new to this forum and am hoping someone can give me some help. I have been with my partner for 3 1/2 years now. We live together and have a good relationship. I am supportive of his recovery and do not interfere with meetings, his recovery is his own. I am not in recovery, I do not drink alcohol an...	Scarlet71	5	705	Jul 12, 2015 by tiredtonite
	Listening to recovering alcoholics (Preview) I went to an aa convention last night and im blown away, as always, by the honesty and awareness shared by the speakers. The love and understanding and gratitude shown in the room by everyone is brilliant. I think about this disease as one disease, just alcoholism and how it affects everyone. The alcoh...	el-cee	18	1103	Jul 12, 2015 by Debb
	Nothing changes (Preview) when nothing changes and HOLY COW .. NOTHING has changed. I guess if I didn't know that before I totally get it again and it was a God thing telling me be so glad you are out of that mess. My XAH definitely has the attitude if it doesn't slap him in the face he doesn't need to deal with it. Part of the reason ap...	SerenityRUS	8	602	Jul 12, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	A piece of my crazy: still surprised at the lying (Preview) I've had a number of rude awakenings this week, and one big one has to do with realizing how much I still need to work on my own recovery. I've been separated from my functioning alcoholic husband for almost 2 years, after a 20+ year marriage. He continues to deny that he has a problem with alcohol, but at...	norasq	7	537	Jul 12, 2015 by norasq
	What Jerry F late for a meeting!!!! (Preview) Yes he was and I'm here to tell on him. HAH!! surprise surprise I thought he was 45 minutes early and then the room was assembled and the fellowship was handling the issue of recovery and no one...not anyone even took notice or issue of my lateness except me. How the hell did this happen...I can neve...	Jerry F	4	506	Jul 11, 2015 by Iamhere
	Life on Life's Terms.....This Week Has Been A Struggle (Preview) On Tuesday of this week, a 22 year old young mother of one was shot and killed in a nearby city. She was a classmate of my sons, and has had her own struggles with the disease. The last time I saw her, she had brought my son home from a meeting. Now, she is dead, her parents are devastated and this has thrown m...	Iamhere	15	716	Jul 11, 2015 by Iamhere
	Happy Saturday! (Preview) Sittin in my favorite spot watching the birds hop around the yard because I just mowed then watered. Hummingbirds flitting around. I've even seen a few American Goldfinches - love those yellow birds! Coffee, birdsong, no roosters crowing, no dogs yapping, peaceful sound of water running - I even ha...	likemyheart	5	485	Jul 11, 2015 by hotrod
	Need help with online meeting info please (Preview) Hello all, I'm desperately trying to get into the online meeting here, but seem to be somehow lost. I "think" it should be in full swing now, but I logged in to what I thought was the right thing and I am the only one "chatting"... Under the name Gidget. Please help with instructi...	Doingmybest	3	462	Jul 11, 2015 by Iamhere
	ready to date??? (Preview) I've met a man. We have had a good time talking at dinners. It's been nice. He seems nice. I've only had dinner a couple of times with him. My radar is up and I feel like I'm on guard all the time. I'm always looking for red flags when we text or talk. I want to date but I don't know if I'm ready. I feel like maybe I s...	texasgal	8	533	Jul 11, 2015 by tiredtonite
	C2C reading 7-11 (Preview) The July 11 reading in the C2C speaks about dealing with anger. It points out that many times we simply stuff our anger and deny reality or we go off in a fury, directing our feelings outward. Al-Anon encourages us to acknowledge our feelings, to be responsible for how we express them and stop blaming, j...	hotrod	5	389	Jul 11, 2015 by Iamhere
	Meeting Topic Tonight (Preview) So the topic of tonight's meeting was "Understanding Ourselves." We talked about our various issues as "Alanoners." The meeting leader shared the issues of the need to be in control and to be perfect. And our tendency to be obsessive. And our issues with anxiety. And how somet...	Green Eyes	8	513	Jul 11, 2015 by hotrod
	My friend, an heroin addict is getting released from prison soon & I'm scared (Preview) His drug addiction spiraled out of control over the course of several years that eventually led him to prison. He has been down a few years and being released later this year. He started out on painkillers then went on using Heroin & whatever he could get his hands onMy biggest fear if he goes back t...	CountryChicMI	7	485	Jul 11, 2015 by Beatrice
	Advice please (Preview) Hi all. I am new here. My DH is a severe alcoholic. He drinks every waking moment that he is not working or sleeping. He drinks before he goes to work. We have an 11 year old son. My dh was a stay at home dad for 10 years. He did not have money to drink then, so he was so much better. He rarely drank, maybe...	wectmall	6	488	Jul 11, 2015 by Beatrice
	I keep getting "the don't do it agains" (Preview) I don't know if anyone else goes through this from the AH in their lives. I know that he means well but sometimes I feel like I can't get past the fact that he has been doing these things like saying "the water is on, you left it on!" Simple to me. Why can't he just turn it off & say nothing? He is...	Hoot Nanny	3	499	Jul 10, 2015 by Iamhere
	Happy Birthday Ms. M (Preview) Dear Ms.M. I pray that today and every day of this year is filed with joy , serenity and love	hotrod	9	738	Jul 10, 2015 by Iamhere
	Because of Fear I Forgot (Preview) I've really been giving my power away to other people this week. The calls to interview have been coming and I had three this week. One job was more interesting because of location and salary. I managed to make myself physically and emotionally ill in the days building up to the in person interview....	tiredtonite	5	609	Jul 10, 2015 by tiredtonite
	The power of communication (Preview) So my landlady showed up yesterday with papers for me to sign and struck up a conversation with me,we actually talked for quite some time.Turns out she hates what she does,and she is under a lot of pressure from the actual owners of this property.They want things a certain way and she has to do all the dir...	mjferg	4	471	Jul 10, 2015 by hotrod
	handling chaos and panic with grace and serenity (Preview) I come home last night from a board meeting and found my daughter in full panic mode - she had spilled HOT ramen soup on her computer and fried it. simple description eh? but what she'd actually done is spill HOT ramen on her thigh and has second degree burns and THAT is my biggest worry. She's only 20 and he...	likemyheart	8	578	Jul 10, 2015 by Iamhere
	Self pity or grief (Preview) I take it back, no i am not filled with self pity but i am still grieving and i know i need to move on. In Gods time I will. i am being gentle with myself as best as i can. It is a process and it takes time. I accept i am a different person after the divorce, it changed something so basic inside of me. i love my ne...	Mirandac	14	628	Jul 10, 2015 by Mirandac
	ODAT 7-10 (Preview) The ODAT reading for today 710 is a very important one and one that I found difficult accepting early on. It begins by suggesting that when a newcomer enters the room and explains their situation,it is important not to react because often their view of the situation is highly colored by theri confu...	hotrod	2	418	Jul 10, 2015 by Debb
	My insecurity lives on. (Preview) I am still living with insecurity and doubt, its a nightmare, sucking the joy out of joy. If someone doesn't text back quick enough Im like, what the hell is going on, do they not like me anymore, what does it mean?? Its driving me nuts. Also, what if they find out about my dysfunctional family and the abus...	el-cee	14	684	Jul 10, 2015 by pinkchip
	When is it time to leave? (Preview) Hello, I am a 29 years old. My mother is an alcoholic and I struggled a lot in my childhood because of this. She was verbally abusive to me and my brother the entire time we lived with our parents. My father is a great person and never left her even after her terrible behavior for many years but I have seen the...	therinoa	14	933	Jul 10, 2015 by Herbalist13
	Alcoholism and hoarding. how do I get rid of the clutter (Preview) i have always been a bit of a clutter bug, but never to the extreme that my AH has taken it. He has managed to trash our entire house and yard except for a few small areas that I rule like the portion of our yard where my koi pond and chickens live, my side of the bedroom and the kitchen, and he refuses to let me g...	JukuVee	15	2713	Jul 10, 2015 by Herbalist13
	ODAT 7-9 (Preview) The ODA T reading for July 9 speaks about self-pity and the ability of this particular emotion to entrench itself in our minds and keep us miserable.The reading points out that self-pity comes from concentrating on the negative aspects of life . It then goes on to dissect self-pity and points o...	hotrod	7	479	Jul 9, 2015 by Debb
	Oh. (Preview) Tomorrow, as I may have mentioned once or twice, is ABF and my birthday. So after big plans went south we settled on a smaller plan of a movie and dinner and I was having mixed feelings about it, because yes I want to see him but no I don't want to deal with drunky and he's been that guy a lot lately. So on one han...	missmeliss	9	722	Jul 9, 2015 by likemyheart
	tried something and it worked! (Preview) Good morning all! Last night I tried something a little different w AH. He was buzzing and wasn't in his hyper mood with it but rather seemed a little frustrated. Not alot but just seemed like if he would've drank more b4 going to bed that he would've been in one of those condescending tone drunks. So ever...	beacheemom	7	442	Jul 9, 2015 by Iamhere
	I am being blackmailed! (Preview) Well some of you know my ongoing saga with a corrupt landlady.I was renting a mobile home from her and decided to buy one in the same mobile home park,She tells people here to only sell to her because she wants the rent and when they don't she gets mad.my thinking was I wouldn't have any more problems with h...	mjferg	2	361	Jul 9, 2015 by Iamhere
	It'd be nice to just speak plainly. (Preview) I really had to shake my head tonight and make a decision to do something differently. I'm not sure what or how, exactly, but...something. There's this ridiculous dynamic of dishonesty and game-playing between my myself, my grandmother and my mother and it's so tiring. Here's today's example. My...	missmeliss	13	556	Jul 9, 2015 by Janine
	Just need someone to talk to. living with ex abf (Preview) I am going to go to a meeting tomorrow. I don't even know where to start. A year and a half after breaking up with my A ex bf, and somewhat reconciling and touching base in may, we have been spending time together, while he was drinking. (Not drinking around me now and less in general as he now says he has some...	giraffe13	10	539	Jul 9, 2015 by Iamhere
	when does it end? (Preview) My ex ah sent me a heated email abt an old Irs tax. He does not want to pay it. I have been paying this tax on a monthly basis to the irs. He got a letter that said they were keeping his refund due to the tax owed. He wants me to pay him the money he is not receiving. Supposedly the at he was to receive was $1000. I hav...	texasgal	10	501	Jul 8, 2015 by texasgal
	effects on child (Preview) I am blown away that my EXAH passed on so many behaviour issues to our son. For 3 yrs plus We did family counciling, individual counciling, the EXAH continued to lie and grow in addiction. Became unsafe (to even have him come around) hence why he is ex for over a year legally now. Now my 10 yr old is OUT OF C...	sweeetr	6	369	Jul 8, 2015 by sweeetr
	Help me write a letter to my acholic son (Preview) HI, I am a mother that has an alcoholic son. I live in florida and he lives in MA with his wife and 2 children. My son is a good man, but he drinks on the weekends, withdraws Monday- Tuesday then when Friday comes he drinks all weekend. He is a mean drink, I just got back from a visit and I could not wait t...	bitche1	2	877	Jul 8, 2015 by Iamhere
	Unrealistic things the alcoholic says (Preview) I am just sitting her and laughing as I remember what the active alcoholic BF said last week. He was complaining about the amount of money spend on food. He says I only eat 4 dollars a day as I am not home. Since I work night shift and I sleep all day. I am not around to eat. Quit cooking meals and letting food go...	joker	4	532	Jul 8, 2015 by Jerry F
	Accepted an offer on our house (Preview) Well if all goes smoothly in the real estate world we will be moving out of our home of 11 years at the end of August. We finally found a buyer after 3 months. I think I'm still in shock. My kids grew up in this house so there were many good times. But for all the good times there were three times as many bad livin...	Yankeerose	5	400	Jul 8, 2015 by Yankeerose
	ODAT reading 7-8 (Preview) The ODAT reading for July 8 speaks about how our mood and attitudes are expressed not only in our words but in the tone and volume of our voices. I also feel is expressed in how we write. I get the sense of your joy from your email and that cheered me. The ODA T reading goes on to suggest that we really lis...	hotrod	5	412	Jul 8, 2015 by Debb
	Went back to my home group (Preview) Well I went. It was good and I'm glad I went and I will keep going. Yep...I see now I have officially turned into a wacko again. But that's ok. In fact it's good in a way. Even though I always knew when I was regularly going to meetings before that the program helped me immensely.... In the back of my mind I thi...	Nightingale	6	347	Jul 8, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	We did tradition 5 spontaneously because a newcomer read it out loud in her turn and asked for it to be explained. (Preview) What a wonderful meeting tradition 5 gave us. Nobody could answer what it meant without reading the tradition out so we changed our agenda and what a blessing that turned out to be. it was a god led meeting from start to finish which fed the newcomer and old timers alike the traditions are rarely that ef...	Quakeroat	8	494	Jul 8, 2015 by Quakeroat
	Perfect! (Preview) XOXOXO	Debb	3	388	Jul 8, 2015 by Iamhere
	trying hard to use my al-anon tools! (Preview) It's the first big deal since I started dating my boyfriend, but I'm seriously hurt and pissed about it. We have been together 16 months and I knew it was bound to happen. Part of me wants to ignore it or even run from this relationship, but I know that's unhealthy thinking. We had my 2 girls and his 2 girls t...	Breakingfree	14	691	Jul 8, 2015 by milkwood
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