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New here-help
(Preview)
Hello everyone, Please forgive me and delete this if its not what/where I'm supposed to post. I looked for an introduction board or "where to start" instructions. This is my absolute first contact with forums or 12-step anything. I tried to read all the guidelines and information, but...
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MOF77
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22
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4113
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Hope for Today May 26
(Preview)
Todays reading is about tradition seven and the idea of being fully self-supporting. The page describes someone who learns to contribute to her own retirement. She develops ways to save money for herself and also spend on herself when she considered carefully the difference between wanting and...
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yanksfan51
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4
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526
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Funny Friday
(Preview)
This has been an insane week, I can't remember the last time I was so busy between work and personal life all good just kind of crazy. My youngest has made not only the Varsity Choir as a sophomore however he's made Jazz Choir as well .. yiippppeee ... this is sooo exciting because they only choose the top...
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SerenityRUS
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4
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365
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Couple counselling in Toronto
(Preview)
Hi, My partner and I would like to go to couple counselling in Toronto but we would like to go to someone who has experience with families whose members were alcoholics (my mother). I don't have any addictions, and only drink on rare occasions, but I do know I am inclu the mental damage has been impacted...
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Toronto1
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2
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362
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Update *When is enough .. enough?
(Preview)
So I laugh, because my parents are like raising children which I equate to herding squirrels .. you get the group going in the same direction and look away and someone is hanging from a telephone wire 50ft in the air. What started with my dad and his inability to hear no has now morphed to my mother and her...
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SerenityRUS
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19
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4381
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Courage to Change, May 24
(Preview)
The reading for today starts by quoting Socrates, "Life contains but two tragedies. One is not to get your heart's desire; the other is to get it." The problem with thinking only about our will is that either we get it and are not satisfied, always pushing for more, or that we don't get it and feel deprive...
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Freetime
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5
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537
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Courage to Change 5/23/19
(Preview)
Today's reading is one I refer to often and one that I share about often...referencing the 10th Step. It suggests that at times, the healthiest thing we can do is to admit that we're not perfect - just human and that we do make mistakes. The reading suggests that it's not easy to admit this to others, esp...
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Iamhere
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2
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1896
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12 Signs of a Spiritual Awakening
(Preview)
I don't know the original source of this as it's apparently all over the internet and attributed to many recovery sites, but this really made me smile today. It makes me think in part about the Promises of Al-Anon. Enjoy! 12 Signs of a Spiritual AwakeningAn increased tendency to let things happen rat...
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Aloha
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5
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2920
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Two personalities
(Preview)
I think my A has alerted me to her drinking again by my realization that the anger, mean streak, weight gain, and going to bed as soon as she gets home, is the drinking person. There is a second personality who can be quite nice, helpful, and sincere. Lately, the nice person is seen maybe once a month, an...
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Lyne
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10
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1790
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Courage to Change May 22
(Preview)
Hello MIP! A little late today, but better late than not at all Today's Reading in Courage to Change is about strengths and secret fears. The author shares that they were afraid in the past that if they ever took the time to really look at themselves, they would find that their secret fears were co...
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Skorpi
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4
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628
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C2C Reading 5-21
(Preview)
The Courage to Change r reading for today, May 21 speaks about the seventh step- Humbly ask HP to remove our shortcomings".The reading points out that we only ask for help. We don't demand or attempt to impress. we Are simply accepting our place in our relationship my HP no more or less. we do not need t...
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hotrod
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3
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1499
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"I know that it works if I work it
(Preview)
and remember that it is not about perfection and expectations are future problems". Those are a few of the realities of the program. Acceptance is the solution to all of my problems and like all tools of recovery I must work them 24/7 along side my HP. ..and MIP. ((((hugs))))
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JerryF
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8
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2077
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Went to a f2f meeting...
(Preview)
Hi y'all... ... I tend to go to meetings for 5 or 6 times. I don't tend to need meetings all year round- these days. Having said this- I attend this meeting right here- regularly- every few days. The combined membership here is strong and fruitful. ... There was only one other member at the meeting- so...
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DavidG
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9
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1627
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Hope for Today May 12
(Preview)
Good morning and Happy Mothers Day to all who are celebrating today:) Todays reading is about how the traditions serve as guidelines for us in Alanon and among our family and friends. To consider the welfare of the group, the power of unity in the group first, and how that helps support personal progre...
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yanksfan51
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4
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3592
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C2C, May 20
(Preview)
The topic for Monday, May 20, is obsessive thinking. The author suggests not letting it get started by making a choicerecognize the danger and drop the thought of it. Use all available alanon tools so that the topic does not get locked inside ones head. The author says that once obsessive thinking b...
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Lyne
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6
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2049
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Trying to get rid of this desire to fix
(Preview)
Why do I have to fix everything? I hate in desire to fix which just eats me up inside until I have solve the problem. I know its from being in a chaos environment but I really need to tone it down and be ok.
Its like if I cant fix it then I feel terrible. It too much responsibility to behave this way.
How do I go a...
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Riley3
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6
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1137
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Hope for Today May 19
(Preview)
Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about the power in the slogan keep it simple. The writer describes worrying over whether or not she should contact a cousin whose mother is dying. She is paralyzed by the idea that she has always felt such shame in being the daughter of an alcoholic. She also...
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yanksfan51
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4
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3992
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Needing to go back over my journey and the trails
(Preview)
My wife just got back from having lunch with my daughter-in-law at Subway Sandwich and while I got a copy of my most famous Chinese Chicken Sandwich I also got the news past, present and future. My HP is sitting with me at this keyboard doing it's very best at keeping myself spiritually level and calm. O...
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JerryF
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12
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3387
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Courage to Change, May 17
(Preview)
The reading for May 17 is about living one day at a time. It reminds us of the saying, "When we talk of tomorrow, the gods laugh." They laugh because the future is not predictable. We can make plans, but we cannot determine future results. Circumstances change, and we change too. We can also take hours,...
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Freetime
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7
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599
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there is no time like the present!
(Preview)
Now is the time to focus on me & my needs. I am embarking on a new adventure. Facing my mom again at the assisted care center. It has been over 6 mos.since I saw her last. I am very anxious about it. I guess I will be OK because her birthday is on Sunday & I am going to try to have a mini party for her if they...
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Hoot Nanny
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5
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1596
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need feedback and suggestions
(Preview)
I love knowing that I can come here to all of your for support, encouragement and suggestions. So things have not gone will between me and AH. We are in counseling and so that is helping at least on issues that are not about when he's drinking. So the biggest things have been communication, and taking t...
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Dancer66
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4
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3273
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Not sure if AlAnon can help with all of my issues?
(Preview)
I am in the program now to help with my current problems of learning to live with an AH. Heres the thing though, my problems all started in childhood. I grew up in a very dysfunctional family. My father was the alcoholic. When sober he was ok, when drunk horribly abusive. A monster really. Well the issues...
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Elabella
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15
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4382
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Courage to Change 5/16/19
(Preview)
Today's reading discusses Tradition Eight and suggests we come together as a fellowship of equals, where no one is in charge and no one is an expert. Every member can contribute to the healing power of Al-Anon simply by sharing his/her personal story of experience, strength and hope. No special tr...
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Iamhere
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2
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297
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Why is detaching with love so hard to do?
(Preview)
The other day at my meeting, the topic was detachment. I have to admit that as a newbie this whole concept is beyond me. When my AH does something, usually verbal abuse/rage, my reaction is always hurt first, and then extreme anger. I practice walking away, not getting sucked into the vortex, but I stil...
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Elabella
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23
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5195
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Courage to Change May 15
(Preview)
Hello MIP! Posting a bit early because my tomorrow falls under the "crazy busy" category. May 15th's reading is about affection and the author's response to the hugs they often see exchanged after meetings. The author shares that they used to avoid the hugs - leaving meetings right away. The au...
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Skorpi
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6
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485
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C2C Reading 5-14
(Preview)
The Courage to Change readings for today May14 suggested that recovery in alanon requires a real discipline This discipline is reflected in our diligence,and patience. We can do this program by regular attendance at meetings, working the steps and embracing the basic principles each day so as to...
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hotrod
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5
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350
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Considering attending 1st Al Anon Meeting - need encouragement
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I am hoping someone can tell me if based on my situation Al-Anon is, indeed, the right place for me. They have a meeting down the street tomorrow night, and I'm scared to go. I am 32 and recently ended a 5-year relationship with my fiancé, who started out with a serious cocaine and alcohol add...
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graces7
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7
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3429
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Continuation of Funding Drive
(Preview)
Hello all, we have now paid our "Go Daddy "account in full for the year. Thank you We still need to pay our other vendor, Sparklit and plan on a continuation of the funding drive starting this weekend and intend to cut it off when we get to 1 year @ $17.98/month prepaid. We will turn on Commu...
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hotrod
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14
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5574
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C2C, 5/13
(Preview)
The reading for Monday, 5/13, talks about the difficulty the author had making decisions, and therefore the procrastination that came along with it. The author shared that they never knew what the right answer was, would therefore wait until the very last minute to decide, and never felt confiden...
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Lyne
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5
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607
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Really in need of support
(Preview)
Sometimes I feel like I am holding by a thread. I have my own issues. Today I am dealing w myself & what I need & now my mom is having major issues. Can't catch a break w her. She definitely has dementia. She is still in assisted living. She had an episode after doing great for a very long time. As best...
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Hoot Nanny
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9
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3402
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If I wont work it ...It will work me
(Preview)
like it or not. I got into an argument with my spouse last night. It contained all of the old characteristics from when the disease was raging in my life with the exception of the physical. I hate being controlled and then yet I had no control over my actions thoughts and desires. I was pissed and for...
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JerryF
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9
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3966
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Happy Mothers Day
(Preview)
Happy Mothers Day to all the moms and all celebrating their moms! Wishing you a beautiful day! TT
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tiredtonite
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2
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3420
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Question about the Joy Journal for May
(Preview)
HI ! I have posted on the Joy Journal yesterday and Thursday. They are not showing on the feed. Any ideas anyone? Today I feel at peace and that is joy for me. No matter what the day brings, and it may get tricky later on, I will hold on to my peace and joy, OHAT. Lyne
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Lyne
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2
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2743
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Small baby steps
(Preview)
I am proud of myself today. After a difficult week of me slipping back into stinky thinking and bad reactions to my AH, I stuck to my boundary of not driving him to places when he's under any influence unless it's a health emergency. I was usually very vulnerable in this area when he verbally pressures me...
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wenyuan
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11
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3537
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Courage to Change, May 10
(Preview)
Today's reading points out that in Al-Anon, each person speaks only for himself or herself. There is no one authority and it isn't assumed that everyone has had the same experience or the same feelings. Nevertheless, each one of us can share our unique experience and listen for what we have in commo...
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Freetime
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6
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1018
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C2C Reading 5-6
(Preview)
The courage to change readings for today May 6 suggested alcoholism is a disease and in arguing with the disease is a waste of our time and energy. It suggests that we would not argue with the person that had cancer or diabetes suggesting thatwe could stop the symptoms though fighting.If we accept the...
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hotrod
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5
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2127
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Courage to Change 5/9/19
(Preview)
Good morning MIP! Today's reading talks about self-esteem and self-worth. The writer is complimented by another member of her group, and feels undeserving and awkward! Her reactions to the complement helped her realize how far down her feelings of self-worth had sunk while living with an alco...
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Iamhere
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4
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1531
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Courage to Change May 8
(Preview)
"Yes, but..." In today's reading from Courage to Change, the author reflects on these words, and how they have become a useful tool for identifying times when the author is refusing to accept something over which they are powerless. The author reflects on all the beautiful, wonderful gifts HP has pr...
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Skorpi
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4
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2027
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God's been good!
(Preview)
I have my share of losses I wouldn't change them if I could. Because I have learned that I don't have to be afraid of tomorrow He is already there!
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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2050
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Bit morose.
(Preview)
Lost an uncle to cancer last night. He's in another country and I knew he was dying for the last 2 months. So I've been thinking a fair bit about death and life lately. I know he's got his angels on the other side and that his life was torture due to the family disease of which he was a double winner. I'm glad he...
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a4l
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6
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2429
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Joyful Dream
(Preview)
I had a bit of trouble getting to sleep last evening so got out of bed and came into the livingroom and watched some late night TV with the misses until I was over done on all sides and came in to try the bed again. I opened myself up to relaxing, joyful thoughts and John our founder snuck into my head. I put o...
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JerryF
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2
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392
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wake up to reality
(Preview)
I just had another ah moment. I was reading on line here and I see where I was wrong. An active alcoholic wants to be the center of attention despite what they say is lies and crap and makes no logical sense. The part where I was wrong is despite knowing this, I fall into the trap of listening to them and liste...
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joker
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7
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459
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C2C, 5/6
(Preview)
The reading for Monday, 5/6, talks about feeling intimidated by Step 5 because it means revealing ones darkest secrets to another person. The author feared rejection yet felt isolated and lonely. After sharing what they seemed most shameful, they learned that they are just like everyone else. R...
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Lyne
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4
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2047
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Step 5 posted
(Preview)
Step 5 has been posted to the Step Boardhttps://stepwork.activeboard.com/t65515417/alanon-step-5-5-1-2019/?page=last#lastPostAnchor Please share your thoughts
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hotrod
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4
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3236
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Compulsion of the mind allergy of the body....
(Preview)
Still with me Argggggh! soooo glad the program is also. My hearing aids crapped out totally and I am living now as if my head is wrapped with a pillow and a tinnitus snake. My audiologist is a gift fro my Higher Power. Her name is Mary which could mean she is really a saint. We did the long test again an...
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JerryF
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10
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3452
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Abusing myself
(Preview)
Reading on line here, I just had an AH moment. By being in toxic abusive active alcoholic relationships, I am abusing myself. I allow active alcoholism (the person using) to abuse me because I have low self esteem and do not value myself. I allow their sickness to become mine and I begin to act and think l...
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joker
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11
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2686
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Hope for Today May 5
(Preview)
Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about the power of the slogans we use. The writer states that initially he/she discounted the slogans as too simple, trite and not helpful at all. Then the realization struck that he/she had slogans that had been in use such as you should know how I feel, if yo...
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yanksfan51
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4
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1886
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Online meeting
(Preview)
I looked at the online meeting schedule and it lists a meeting this morning at 10am EST. I just entered the chatroom and there was no host/meeting. Was I looking at an old meeting schedule or did I use the incorrect meeting chatroom link? If so, can someone please share the schedule and/or link for th...
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LiveLaughLove
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2
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2537
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Returning newbie
(Preview)
I visited this site several years ago, due to having a difficult time with my ABF and looking for some much needed ESH. I ended up leaving the relationship, because it was apparent that he was not ready to stop drinking and his addiction and related behaviors were bringing me down with him. I was an emo...
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LiveLaughLove
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4
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2289
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Relapse
(Preview)
My husband left his second stint in rehab 60 days ago. He informed me today that he has had a couple beers since he got out. I guess he felt guilty about lying after we celebrated his 90 days yesterday. I feel so disappointed, not because he had a drink but because he is trying to convince himself and me tha...
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Naomippb
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5
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2950
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Feeling overwelmed
(Preview)
I am doing all I can to do self care. However, I am nearing my breaking point. Since Friday, I have been homeless, living at my sisters home. I am in the process of selling my home and all I have received is negative feedback from the state of my home. Not clean enough even though I have spent hours cleaning i...
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joker
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5
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2521
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C2C, May 3rd
(Preview)
Detachment -- that is the topic of today's reading. The writer has come to believe that detachment might sound cold and heartless, but that it actually is loving, because it recognizes that our loved ones have the privilege to be themselves. By intervening in another's struggles, we interfere wi...
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Freetime
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5
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1544
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When is enough .. enough?
(Preview)
When is enough .. enough in any relationship? I accept things in the name of family I would not accept from a casual acquaintance or stranger. When has that line been crossed by family to the point that enough is enough and I am not obligated to continue to try again? I'm currently looking at that in p...
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SerenityRUS
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19
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957
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Let's focus on US and what we have been doing to make our lives better
(Preview)
I have been reading posts and a consistent theme is "put the focus back on ourselves". I spent some time outside today, planting some seeds, watering, and just enjoying the beauty of this time of year. I haven't done any painting in a while, so today I worked a little on one--added some "movement" to th...
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lgnutah
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8
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2184
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Courage to Change 5/2/19
(Preview)
Today's reading talks about the willingness to let go of our need to do 'it' by ourselves, and instead listen to ESH and our higher power. The reading opens by reflecting on being so busy staring at the problem(s) that we miss the guidance available. We can and do become better able to move beyond our p...
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Iamhere
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5
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707
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I am back after a year of trials and tribulations...
(Preview)
So today I started the day by writing in my journal and crying and begging God to give me a sign, an answer, anything to bring me out of what Ill call a really trying year. My answer was to go to AlAnon meeting which I havent done in over a year. So I did and here I am. Happy and grateful to be back. After my last po...
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Elabella
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16
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6695
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Courage to Change May 1
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading from Courage to Change, the author reflects on the experience they had in an AlAnon meeting with completing this sentence: "If only ___________ would happen, I would be happy." Initially, the author and many group members completed this phrase with things like "The a...
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Skorpi
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5
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656
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Denial...
(Preview)
This was the topic at a meeting I went to last weekend...and the person who did the topic had a very interesting, and very fascinating "slant" or "approach" to the topic of denial. She focused on denial as it relates only to OUR denial, as the loved one of an alcoholic. This had ZERO to do with the denial of...
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Bo
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37
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3596
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Changes...
(Preview)
I have been going to meetings and getting myself back on track. My exbf has decided to work on himself for the better. He left his toxic relationship and is working on himself. Turns out he was being physically and mentally abused in his toxic relationship. I'm glad he is working on his issues. He wants t...
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Wndrwmn
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4
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1859
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ODAT Reading Tuesday 4-30
(Preview)
The ODAT reading for today, April 30 speaks about each of our actions and points out that most people's actions have selfish motives and that people in AA readily admit this.. The reading suggests that we know that offering Al-Anon to those in need of the comfort found in Alanon is actually construct...
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hotrod
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6
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743
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