The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Sometimes I feel like I am holding by a thread. I have my own issues. Today I am dealing w myself & what I need & now my mom is having major issues. Can't catch a break w her. She definitely has dementia. She is still in assisted living. She had an episode after doing great for a very long time. As best as she can. Me I am coping. Need support now more than I have needed for a long time.
(((Kathleen))) - I am sorry you are having a difficult day. Sending tons of thoughts and prayers your way for you and your momma! Hang in there and take good care of you!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Time like this I remind myself and I am actually powerless and so use different tools to participate. If what I use results in anxiety I find something else. Try compassion for her also. I cannot imagine she is having a smooth time with it either. Sending my HP by to give you strength. ((((hugs))))
{{{Kathleen}}} My mom died two years ago in a nursing home with dementia. She didn't know exactly who I was anymore, but just that I was someone she loved. It was so sad watching her slip away. I appreciate what the others said, we are powerless, we need compassion, and most certainly we need to take care of ourselves. Wishing you peace ODAT, Lyne
I don't really know you, or your issues. No matter. You reached out b/c you are in pain, and I could feel it in your words. I will add you to my prayer list. Knowing we are powerless over something is the hardest thing to accept!
Praying that your HP gives you a peaceful day, and that you are open and receptive to it!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
It is really difficult and gets to be very up and down which is so disconcerting. Sending you prayers and hugs.
I found that I really needed to take good care of myself when I was caring for my mum in her final days. I couldn't imagine how to do that but was persuaded to take a day off and I went and spent the day in nature, photographing beautiful things and that helped me to rebuild my energy. It also gave me some nice snapshots to look at and to share with my mum as well. As a friend told me at the time "you can't give from an empty cup, and boy do you want to give." Take care of yourself when you can. (((Hugs)))
Now it is mother's day! I am still a bit dealing w my own issues. It seems like sometimes doing better than I am. I guess I need to get out of self pity & get on w my life! Only God knows what I really need. So I have talked to my mom numerous times since this last poast! She sounds better but is in a wheelchair. All I can say that she in the hands of God. & remember to treat her as I would treat any sick person. More will be revealed.
My wife and I went to visit my Mother at her elder living situation and after a while we were planning to leave which really upset my mom. She wasn't ready to be left alone to her situation and became agitated. We excused ourselves for a couple minutes and went out in the hallway to talk about what it was we could do and arrived at the solution that what was going good for us could be shared and we went back into her room and shared our programs while keeping them anonymous. The affect was so noticible as my mother came into relaxation and acceptance until we were on our way out. My wife and I learned a lesson about the power of "giving it away" and being patient with sharing recovery. I will never forget that incident which is one reason I am so grateful for our program. (((hugs)))
