Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Doingmybest · Doingmybest

To begin, I have been married for over 20 years to a very serious AH. He had one (dry) period of 6 months several years ago and has been "sober" for the last nine months (working the program for the first time). He and I had become quite the love/hate relationship with a few weeks of half way d...

Doingmybest · Doingmybest

As I was reading another post today, I saw a statement about having the courage to face the things we have been hiding away. (This is not an exact quote). For me, I find that secrets are like a a slow spreading poison. They damage everyone and I don't do well with them. My biggest issue is that I don't ofte...

Hopefull15 · Hopefull15

This is.the most access/time Ive had to post on here and to take in all of the wonderful shares and suggestions. Ive eluded in previous posts that my AH and I are waring over money right now. He's lost several jobs in a very short timespan leaving me to struggle to keep things afloat for our family of 4. He'...

Jill · Jill

Whoever was the focus of my obsessions and frantic dancing to manipulate the outcome does not matter. I arrived at AlAnon completely in the middle of my own maladaptive behavior. My formula was to try harder doing and thinking my ineffectual way. It is I who needed help here. I am my own AlAnon qualifi...

ChipsAreFalling · ChipsAreFalling

I posted this on another forum but wanted your ESH as well. This is so hard for me to do! My AH is trying to get sober again (supposedly) and is on day 6 I think. I'm somewhat skeptical obviously but trying to support him. My problem is the jerky behavior is still an issue - another shut-down just happened th...

Hopefull15 · Hopefull15

Just had a revelation....When thinking back on the timeline of just the most recent events of deterioration in my family (not including what has transpired over the years in total)...Im am absolutly blown away at what felt like an eternity was really only events that transpired over a 12 month perio...

Theoceancalls · Theoceancalls

So im moving out tomorrow . . My stbexah cheated multiple times over many years. Is begging for forgivenes, bla bla and saying he will change. We are proceeding with the divorce. My 11 yp daughter the love if my life blames me. "why cant you forgive. . What did he do. . ". . Shes knows of his drink...

KennyFenderjazz · KennyFenderjazz

Hi Everyone, The wife had what I hoped was a slip about a month-and-a-half ago. She bought a vodka bottle at the drugstore, and downed most of it a day later. I caught her in the garage trying to get more in the morning. It scared the daylights out of her, she was on the phone at 3 AM trying to raise her spon...

ShellyM · ShellyM

I have been to 5 meetings so far. I know that I am here to stay. Things finally reached the point where I had nowhere to turn but to myself - thank God. I've been working very hard at following the steps and reading the literature and attending the meeting near my home. From what I have learned, a lot of pro...

Hopefull15 · Hopefull15

He keeps coming home (after a full day of drinking) talking sh** and being a jerk. The more I ignore the more he keeps at it with little things like burning my pots trying to cook (for the second time in 24 hrs) Cant call my sponsor right now because I would need to leave the kids home alone with him in order to...

Foothold · Foothold

After six months of increasingly bad drinking and poor responsibility, last month we told my adult son that he could not return to live with us once he had left rehab (his third rehab in 2015). I have a good counselor and a supportive husband and family, but tonight it's late, everyone's asleep, and I'm...

EarlyBird · EarlyBird

My AH has been working to stay sober since April, with a relapse in August. He swears that he hasn't had a drink since I caught him last, in August. I'm trying really hard to believe him. Although, nights like last night is making it very difficult. He will have a night or two each week - usually the sam...

mjferg · mjferg

I will not let this latest news shatter me. I cried this morning,but now I am determined to help my daughter as much as I can.Her husband is going to prison for molesting my granddaughter,there is proof in his text messages. She is left with a terrible financial burden,she may lose her home,it isn't fai...

Joy2flow · Joy2flow

Good morning - my first post here - trying to wrap my head around my situation and not feeling like I'm getting very far. I'm scared and finding it hard to admit he is an AH. I'm angry - really angry that i'm having to deal with any of this. Is that normal? I think I still love my AH but at the same time I feel...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for January 6 reminds us that in between meetings we must keep in close touch with other Al-Anon members by telephone. Sharing Al-Anon recovery by telephone allows me to reach out to someone else and talk things over ton reason things out. .I must remember that the person I'm talki...

KT2015 · KT2015

I really like the just for today poem. I wrote it out and read it often. The part that really gets me is the part about "just for today I will take my luck as it comes and try to fit myself to it". It gets me because it wss such a forign concept to me. I've been waking up each morning and saying this to m...

mjferg · mjferg

As I sit here and type I am shaking,my granddaughter is telling the truth, she was molested.The family is coming together to support my daughter and my granddaughter,my heart is aching for my daughter,what a terrible thing to be betrayed like that by her husband,I can't imagine the pain.She is filin...

Carmel 15 · Carmel 15

My partner has now been out of rehab 3 weeks and I notice his behaviors are very similar as before he went in. He is not attending any meetings or seeing any workers just reading his workbooks he says and making statements he will never drink again as he is now cured of that he is 100% sure. He is going witho...

lounap23 · lounap23

My GF has been in AA and sober for about 19 days. Is it ok to tell her I am proud of her? Or is there a way to communicate that and be supportive to her?

redhead805 · redhead805

I'm very concerned with my live in boyfriends drinking and I feel like I'm at the end of my rope. He's 31 and has been drinking every day for the last ten years, most days around 30 drinks. I'm so sad and frustrated and I don't know what to do. I love him so much...I want to help him, but sometimes I don't kn...

mjferg · mjferg

Just when things seemed to be getting better I get the most shocking news.My granddaughter went to the police and told them her stepfather,my daughter's husband, has been molesting her since she was 10 years old!!!He has been arrested and his statement was released on the news,he said,"It may...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Christmas Day, as I mentioned, ended up being an ABF-free affair. I decided I didn't want to spend hours and $$ going to see his family, he felt I'd stopped him from seeing his family (although he could have gotten in the car with his brother...whom he lives with!!) and things were thus kind of strained b...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

i was sitting in my new but roach ridden apartment tonite and feeling so werid. its like 24 yrs of living with my xah justlike slammed shut,walled up and seems so strange now that im gone from the situation. i dont get any calls from my xah and it feels so unreal or surreal and that is a puzzling and sometime...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- and Happy New Year! I hope 2016 is off to a good start for everybody. Today's reading of a focus on our phrase: "... in Al-Anon we discover that no situation is really hopeless". Like the writer, the first time I heard that spoken at a meeting I thought, 'well of cours...

tortuga · tortuga

Dear MIP i have been off the boards for quite some time, for I discovered the spiritual path that works well for me, and I wanted to be in the present and maybe look into the future, thats why I didn't come back much here to share, for I needed to make peace with the past and be silent about it, i was so happy and...

Jazzie18 · Jazzie18

I lost it on my AH who has been sober for going on 7 months. Found a nip in his jacket pocket. I know I should have stopped and thought before reacting but it just pissed me off so much and I had to show it to him and ask him what this was. His immediate response was that he had been cleaning out the garage and f...

Rinn · Rinn

Also I have been telling my brother about alanon for years. He has seen this crazy change in me... ( you know peace and a one day at a time attitude.) Anyway he calls for advice sometimes and yesterday I told him you know you just need to accept your relationship (a healthy one, after being in an unhealthy...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I started my journey 30 years today! I am blessed to have stuck w/ the program! I don't know how many of you celebrate your recovery dates. I hope this post will make you remember when it was that you started your journey to wellness. This program works. My first meeting was very low-key. I had been to AA me...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Happy New Year to each of you within my MIP family. It's a new day in a new year and I am always grateful to be alive. There is something about a 'new start' that brings peace to me, and I am hoping to hold on to that one moment at a time, one day at a time. So, I thought - what better way to start a new year than a po...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for January 4 speaks about the tools of the program and haw simple. they can be. The reading talks about a person first coming into the program.,seeing everyone with some degree of serenity and asking how can I accomplish the same. The answer is; go to meetings, share when you can, work...

psychszsd · psychszsd

My fiance is titrating off of methadone. He has become very distant and disconnected, depressed and anxious. He seems to just want to do his own thing. I am very supportive but this is really wearing me down. I have been a cushion for him for over a year, never pushing too hard, but lately I'm always upset...

sunflowers271 · sunflowers271

Hi! I am a Pre-K teacher at a Private Center and was working my last day of 2015 on Wednesday, Dec. 29 when my sister called me in hysterics. I am well aware of her issue with alcoholism and how bad it has been for at least 6 weeks. She has had issues with substance abuse in the past and has been in rehab sever...

justme1900 · justme1900

I have been in and out of Alanon since I was 19 years old. More in than out thank God. Though I had a major relapse 5 years ago but got myself back into the rooms. I had relocated to a new state for a Job and started going back to Alanon face to face meetings and I just didn't feel comfortable at...

HopeForJoy · HopeForJoy

Hello. I like reading through forums. I feel much similar issues. I am so confused right now, My AH and I have many children together, he comes home almost drunk every night only to finish off till he fall asleep sitting up then wakes between 2-4 am to grab another beer. It is very strong IPA beers that he l...

Mattie · Mattie

I thought by now that I was an old-timer who knows the ropes. I also got off easy in the alcoholism department, if you call any of the insanity and chaos easy. But I mean that my A has always been a binge drinker, so there are periods of non-drinking in between the episodes, sometimes months long. And he'...

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for January 3 suggests that we should take the time to realize that we are writing our life story with every single second of each day. It suggests that if we want to see the movie (of our life) move in a positive direction, maybe we need to make some changes. We can do nothing to chan...

Bethany66 · Bethany66

I know this is probably a medical question, but I am concerned. Lately my AH is twitching while he sleeps to the point that it keeps me awake. It seems to be shortly after consuming large quantities of alcohol and coming to bed. The tremors last only a second but I watch his body twitch and his hands cle...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

SPENT A WONDERFUL AFTERNOON WITH AN OLD FRIEND. FELT AT PEACE, SO HAPPY AND POSITIVE. FEEL TIRED BUT ENERGIZED. SO GOOD TO TALK FREELY AND FEEL ALIVE AGAIN :]

savannah7070 · savannah7070

Long story made short, I moved myself and our two preteen daughters out of our home last weekend because of AH and all the arguing when he drinks. We have been married 15 years and I am extremely codependent which allowed him to treat me like a doormat and a possession. He could always do whatever it was he...

joker · joker

I have been reading the messages on line and I have come to see I am in an emotional abusive relationship with ABF who is now 3 months sober and I am his cheerleader. I am the one that is there for him constantly, giving him encouragement due to my fear of not seeing him succeed. Its like I am the one holding it...

hotrod · hotrod

Courage to Change reading for January 2 points out that turning to the alcoholic for affection and support is like going to the hardware store for bread.. We may have an expectation that a good parents should nurture us and support our feelings or a loving spouse comfort us and hold us when we are afra...

joker · joker

I will do my best to explain how I feel. My ABF quit drinking 3 months ago and has become very distant emotionally, very self centered and changes plans constantly. My head is spinning not getting confirmation of what is going on with him. Maybe I am finally seeing who he really is now and its not what I wan...

catlover26 · catlover26

It is all so hard to explain how little things I can say to him can make him upset. He also has ptsd so any conflict between us he would rather just not talk about. Last night I just wanted us to sit on the couch together. We have talked about this before but for a few 'intimate' reasons he doesn't want to have r...

Hopefull15 · Hopefull15

Its been a couple of weeks since I last posted and as much as I hate to say it I feel like a broken record ....the on again off again merry go round...just gets exhaustng to the point that I dont even have to energy to get on the boards here or do even an online meeting. I swear every week its something differen...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I can't believe it! I am suffering from a head cold. Not a great way to celebrate...I even had plans for later today... I guess I will be down for awhile. Well...I went to bed earlier than expected. Didn't intend on staying up but life is funny... I woke up just after midnight... right after the firework...

Broken513 · Broken513

hotrod · hotrod

C2C reading for January 1 speaks about living in a society of instant gratification. Instant coffee instant money from the bank machine instant breakfast etc. It's everywhere we look. No wonder many of us arrived at Al-Anon looking for the instant answer to all our problems. Recovery is a process th...

John · John

A great video about being a parent, more specifically a mother and wife... a woman is speaking to her young daughter. I watched it and decided it would be a good fit here for people to watch. Hope you enjoy it. Reply and let me know what you think of it, how it effected you, etc. "How hard is it being a wife a...

mjferg · mjferg

Looking back at some of my posts it was quite a painful year,I shed a lot of tears,There were days the pain was so intense I didn't think I was going to survive it, But I did. I am discovering amazing things about myself,abilities I didn't even know I had.I am starting to really enjoy the changes that are co...

Heisenberg · Heisenberg

Hi all, I've posted once or twice before, but mostly just spend time as a reader here. Hoping others could help chime in on what I'm experiencing (I'm sure many have!) and provide some advice. So...long story short, I've finally made the split from my Fiancee (we own a home together, no kids) and I am sta...

Broken513 · Broken513

Good morning...Long time no write..lol... In the church, I was taught ...If everything is going well in your life, something is wrong.......I was also taught to cast all your worries on Him...which is Let go Let God......and in the last 4 1/2 months I have been doing this. I have also been taught to tru...

Fresh · Fresh

I am new to Al-Anon and I am confused by what my responsibility as the AH's Wife is supposed to be. He is currently at a treatment center. I have promised to stop drinking as well(not because I have a drinking problem but just for support)Well, my best friend and her husband are coming over tonight to spe...

hotrod · hotrod

The Courage to Change reading for December 31 speaks about the end of the year and suggests taking a few minutes to contemplate the progress that we have made.. It asks us to note what we did to contribute to our success. For example: we continue to attend meetings we've reached out to others for fello...

Thorn · Thorn

JADE is a concept I struggle with. I have made vast improvements in this area by minding my business and not encroaching on the decisions of my husband and my 2 20-something kids that live with us. This of course is confusing and sometimes infuriating my AH (sober 20+ years but no longer attends mtgs). M...

KT2015 · KT2015

My mom is not an alcoholic but lately I am struggling the most with my relationship with her. My mom raised me almost completely on her own. I lived with her full time and saw my dad on some weekends. We were extremely close. My mom has a mental illness she has struggled with my whole life. Two years a...

mjferg · mjferg

I have been struggling for quite some time now,struggling financially and emotionally. Life has been a real struggle this past year.I feel like I am in a little rowboat full of holes and i just keep patching the holes, I patch one and another one appears.I have way too many expenses for my income. So a co...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I suggest that no one stays up to ring in the new year unless you want to. I personally need the sleep. Won't go anywhere to celebrate. Sparkling cider & alcohol free egg nog. Maybe some nuts & light snacks. I am actually looking forward to the new year. Let go of the old year & bring in the new....

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for December 30 speaks about the negative things that other people say and do and how not to allow this to destroy our peace of mind. . It points out that we have" choices "and if we do not allow ourselves to respond to the negative words of a sick person, we will not be giving...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

So im grumpy from my cold and there is still lots to be done to whip this place into shape. i had the exterminaters come with no result so taking it in my own hands and intend to seal with caulk every crack and crevice in this whole place and set up with a resort of roach motels lol and attack directly with spra...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

How is everyone going to celebrate the new year? I am considering a very sober celebration of the new year 2016! I am even turning 50 this coming year. I hope you all can cope w/ or w/o the drinking in your loved ones lives. I am hopeful for all of you. I am so grateful that Christmas is over only because I can g...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Over the last year... (Preview) To begin, I have been married for over 20 years to a very serious AH. He had one (dry) period of 6 months several years ago and has been "sober" for the last nine months (working the program for the first time). He and I had become quite the love/hate relationship with a few weeks of half way d...	Doingmybest	5	866	Jan 8, 2016 by Enigmatic
	Secrets (Preview) As I was reading another post today, I saw a statement about having the courage to face the things we have been hiding away. (This is not an exact quote). For me, I find that secrets are like a a slow spreading poison. They damage everyone and I don't do well with them. My biggest issue is that I don't ofte...	Doingmybest	3	1926	Jan 8, 2016 by Doingmybest
	Should I ask him for money ?... (Preview) This is.the most access/time Ive had to post on here and to take in all of the wonderful shares and suggestions. Ive eluded in previous posts that my AH and I are waring over money right now. He's lost several jobs in a very short timespan leaving me to struggle to keep things afloat for our family of 4. He'...	Hopefull15	4	780	Jan 7, 2016 by Hopefull15
	My Qualifier (Preview) Whoever was the focus of my obsessions and frantic dancing to manipulate the outcome does not matter. I arrived at AlAnon completely in the middle of my own maladaptive behavior. My formula was to try harder doing and thinking my ineffectual way. It is I who needed help here. I am my own AlAnon qualifi...	Jill	3	2259	Jan 7, 2016 by Jerry F
	How to detach? (Preview) I posted this on another forum but wanted your ESH as well. This is so hard for me to do! My AH is trying to get sober again (supposedly) and is on day 6 I think. I'm somewhat skeptical obviously but trying to support him. My problem is the jerky behavior is still an issue - another shut-down just happened th...	ChipsAreFalling	7	1275	Jan 7, 2016 by Jerry F
	How time flies when we deal in daily chaos.... (Preview) Just had a revelation....When thinking back on the timeline of just the most recent events of deterioration in my family (not including what has transpired over the years in total)...Im am absolutly blown away at what felt like an eternity was really only events that transpired over a 12 month perio...	Hopefull15	2	517	Jan 7, 2016 by YARNCRAZY
	children divorce ah and infidelity (Preview) So im moving out tomorrow . . My stbexah cheated multiple times over many years. Is begging for forgivenes, bla bla and saying he will change. We are proceeding with the divorce. My 11 yp daughter the love if my life blames me. "why cant you forgive. . What did he do. . ". . Shes knows of his drink...	Theoceancalls	11	996	Jan 7, 2016 by savannah7070
	Relapse (Preview) Hi Everyone, The wife had what I hoped was a slip about a month-and-a-half ago. She bought a vodka bottle at the drugstore, and downed most of it a day later. I caught her in the garage trying to get more in the morning. It scared the daylights out of her, she was on the phone at 3 AM trying to raise her spon...	KennyFenderjazz	29	1127	Jan 7, 2016 by hotrod
	How does the next step work? (Preview) I have been to 5 meetings so far. I know that I am here to stay. Things finally reached the point where I had nowhere to turn but to myself - thank God. I've been working very hard at following the steps and reading the literature and attending the meeting near my home. From what I have learned, a lot of pro...	ShellyM	6	833	Jan 7, 2016 by Taraxacum
	Ready to Explode!!!...My AH is trying really hard to pick a fight (Preview) He keeps coming home (after a full day of drinking) talking sh** and being a jerk. The more I ignore the more he keeps at it with little things like burning my pots trying to cook (for the second time in 24 hrs) Cant call my sponsor right now because I would need to leave the kids home alone with him in order to...	Hopefull15	17	855	Jan 6, 2016 by Hopefull15
	New to forums, and having a tough night (Preview) After six months of increasingly bad drinking and poor responsibility, last month we told my adult son that he could not return to live with us once he had left rehab (his third rehab in 2015). I have a good counselor and a supportive husband and family, but tonight it's late, everyone's asleep, and I'm...	Foothold	6	689	Jan 6, 2016 by Foothold
	I'm Trying - but its getting harder (Preview) My AH has been working to stay sober since April, with a relapse in August. He swears that he hasn't had a drink since I caught him last, in August. I'm trying really hard to believe him. Although, nights like last night is making it very difficult. He will have a night or two each week - usually the sam...	EarlyBird	2	548	Jan 6, 2016 by hotrod
	courage (Preview) I will not let this latest news shatter me. I cried this morning,but now I am determined to help my daughter as much as I can.Her husband is going to prison for molesting my granddaughter,there is proof in his text messages. She is left with a terrible financial burden,she may lose her home,it isn't fai...	mjferg	5	722	Jan 6, 2016 by Iamhere
	Newbie here - scared & angry (Preview) Good morning - my first post here - trying to wrap my head around my situation and not feeling like I'm getting very far. I'm scared and finding it hard to admit he is an AH. I'm angry - really angry that i'm having to deal with any of this. Is that normal? I think I still love my AH but at the same time I feel...	Joy2flow	11	779	Jan 6, 2016 by Taraxacum
	Courage to Change Reading 1-6-2016 (Preview) The C2C reading for January 6 reminds us that in between meetings we must keep in close touch with other Al-Anon members by telephone. Sharing Al-Anon recovery by telephone allows me to reach out to someone else and talk things over ton reason things out. .I must remember that the person I'm talki...	hotrod	2	667	Jan 6, 2016 by Taraxacum
	Taking my luck as it comes... (Preview) I really like the just for today poem. I wrote it out and read it often. The part that really gets me is the part about "just for today I will take my luck as it comes and try to fit myself to it". It gets me because it wss such a forign concept to me. I've been waking up each morning and saying this to m...	KT2015	7	876	Jan 6, 2016 by KennyFenderjazz
	its true (Preview) As I sit here and type I am shaking,my granddaughter is telling the truth, she was molested.The family is coming together to support my daughter and my granddaughter,my heart is aching for my daughter,what a terrible thing to be betrayed like that by her husband,I can't imagine the pain.She is filin...	mjferg	9	827	Jan 6, 2016 by Iamhere
	Partner out of rehab and behaviour appears the same (Preview) My partner has now been out of rehab 3 weeks and I notice his behaviors are very similar as before he went in. He is not attending any meetings or seeing any workers just reading his workbooks he says and making statements he will never drink again as he is now cured of that he is 100% sure. He is going witho...	Carmel 15	6	652	Jan 5, 2016 by hotrod
	New Here and have a simple question (Preview) My GF has been in AA and sober for about 19 days. Is it ok to tell her I am proud of her? Or is there a way to communicate that and be supportive to her?	lounap23	3	518	Jan 5, 2016 by lounap23
	Lonely and Worried (Preview) I'm very concerned with my live in boyfriends drinking and I feel like I'm at the end of my rope. He's 31 and has been drinking every day for the last ten years, most days around 30 drinks. I'm so sad and frustrated and I don't know what to do. I love him so much...I want to help him, but sometimes I don't kn...	redhead805	3	816	Jan 5, 2016 by CoopsMom
	I am devastated!!! (Preview) Just when things seemed to be getting better I get the most shocking news.My granddaughter went to the police and told them her stepfather,my daughter's husband, has been molesting her since she was 10 years old!!!He has been arrested and his statement was released on the news,he said,"It may...	mjferg	14	994	Jan 5, 2016 by KT2015
	I didn't let him eat his noodles. (Preview) Christmas Day, as I mentioned, ended up being an ABF-free affair. I decided I didn't want to spend hours and $$ going to see his family, he felt I'd stopped him from seeing his family (although he could have gotten in the car with his brother...whom he lives with!!) and things were thus kind of strained b...	missmeliss	16	988	Jan 5, 2016 by KT2015
	wondering (Preview) i was sitting in my new but roach ridden apartment tonite and feeling so werid. its like 24 yrs of living with my xah justlike slammed shut,walled up and seems so strange now that im gone from the situation. i dont get any calls from my xah and it feels so unreal or surreal and that is a puzzling and sometime...	YARNCRAZY	3	565	Jan 5, 2016 by Mike B
	Hope for Today Jan 5 (Preview) Good morning everyone- and Happy New Year! I hope 2016 is off to a good start for everybody. Today's reading of a focus on our phrase: "... in Al-Anon we discover that no situation is really hopeless". Like the writer, the first time I heard that spoken at a meeting I thought, 'well of cours...	yanksfan51	2	596	Jan 5, 2016 by Iamhere
	addiction (Preview) Dear MIP i have been off the boards for quite some time, for I discovered the spiritual path that works well for me, and I wanted to be in the present and maybe look into the future, thats why I didn't come back much here to share, for I needed to make peace with the past and be silent about it, i was so happy and...	tortuga	3	715	Jan 4, 2016 by Iamhere
	Flipped out (Preview) I lost it on my AH who has been sober for going on 7 months. Found a nip in his jacket pocket. I know I should have stopped and thought before reacting but it just pissed me off so much and I had to show it to him and ask him what this was. His immediate response was that he had been cleaning out the garage and f...	Jazzie18	6	1061	Jan 4, 2016 by Mattie
	I am greatful and felt like sharing my story and happiness!!! I hope it encourages someone. (Preview) Also I have been telling my brother about alanon for years. He has seen this crazy change in me... ( you know peace and a one day at a time attitude.) Anyway he calls for advice sometimes and yesterday I told him you know you just need to accept your relationship (a healthy one, after being in an unhealthy...	Rinn	3	767	Jan 4, 2016 by KennyFenderjazz
	30 years today! (Preview) I started my journey 30 years today! I am blessed to have stuck w/ the program! I don't know how many of you celebrate your recovery dates. I hope this post will make you remember when it was that you started your journey to wellness. This program works. My first meeting was very low-key. I had been to AA me...	Hoot Nanny	4	601	Jan 4, 2016 by KennyFenderjazz
	Gratitude - It's more than a Feeling.... (Preview) Happy New Year to each of you within my MIP family. It's a new day in a new year and I am always grateful to be alive. There is something about a 'new start' that brings peace to me, and I am hoping to hold on to that one moment at a time, one day at a time. So, I thought - what better way to start a new year than a po...	Iamhere	13	766	Jan 4, 2016 by Rinn
	Courage to Change 1-4=2016 (Preview) The C2C reading for January 4 speaks about the tools of the program and haw simple. they can be. The reading talks about a person first coming into the program.,seeing everyone with some degree of serenity and asking how can I accomplish the same. The answer is; go to meetings, share when you can, work...	hotrod	2	542	Jan 4, 2016 by Debb
	Fiance titration from methadone (Preview) My fiance is titrating off of methadone. He has become very distant and disconnected, depressed and anxious. He seems to just want to do his own thing. I am very supportive but this is really wearing me down. I have been a cushion for him for over a year, never pushing too hard, but lately I'm always upset...	psychszsd	2	2036	Jan 4, 2016 by KennyFenderjazz
	I am new at this and it has been a heck of a New Year so far (Preview) Hi! I am a Pre-K teacher at a Private Center and was working my last day of 2015 on Wednesday, Dec. 29 when my sister called me in hysterics. I am well aware of her issue with alcoholism and how bad it has been for at least 6 weeks. She has had issues with substance abuse in the past and has been in rehab sever...	sunflowers271	4	577	Jan 3, 2016 by Iamhere
	Not feeling welcomed at a face to face meeting (Preview) I have been in and out of Alanon since I was 19 years old. More in than out thank God. Though I had a major relapse 5 years ago but got myself back into the rooms. I had relocated to a new state for a Job and started going back to Alanon face to face meetings and I just didn't feel comfortable at...	justme1900	9	826	Jan 3, 2016 by Iamhere
	Very unsure about the future. (Preview) Hello. I like reading through forums. I feel much similar issues. I am so confused right now, My AH and I have many children together, he comes home almost drunk every night only to finish off till he fall asleep sitting up then wakes between 2-4 am to grab another beer. It is very strong IPA beers that he l...	HopeForJoy	8	806	Jan 3, 2016 by Iamhere
	The craziness that keeps on giving (Preview) I thought by now that I was an old-timer who knows the ropes. I also got off easy in the alcoholism department, if you call any of the insanity and chaos easy. But I mean that my A has always been a binge drinker, so there are periods of non-drinking in between the episodes, sometimes months long. And he'...	Mattie	11	819	Jan 3, 2016 by YARNCRAZY
	Courage to Change 1-3 (Preview) The C2C reading for January 3 suggests that we should take the time to realize that we are writing our life story with every single second of each day. It suggests that if we want to see the movie (of our life) move in a positive direction, maybe we need to make some changes. We can do nothing to chan...	hotrod	2	633	Jan 3, 2016 by Iamhere
	Twitching while sleeping (Preview) I know this is probably a medical question, but I am concerned. Lately my AH is twitching while he sleeps to the point that it keeps me awake. It seems to be shortly after consuming large quantities of alcohol and coming to bed. The tremors last only a second but I watch his body twitch and his hands cle...	Bethany66	7	2434	Jan 3, 2016 by Iamhere
	WONDERFUL AFTERNOON (Preview) SPENT A WONDERFUL AFTERNOON WITH AN OLD FRIEND. FELT AT PEACE, SO HAPPY AND POSITIVE. FEEL TIRED BUT ENERGIZED. SO GOOD TO TALK FREELY AND FEEL ALIVE AGAIN :]	YARNCRAZY	3	433	Jan 2, 2016 by hotrod
	AH is having himself admitted to hospital to dry out...how will this help (Preview) Long story made short, I moved myself and our two preteen daughters out of our home last weekend because of AH and all the arguing when he drinks. We have been married 15 years and I am extremely codependent which allowed him to treat me like a doormat and a possession. He could always do whatever it was he...	savannah7070	14	917	Jan 2, 2016 by savannah7070
	another realization made (Preview) I have been reading the messages on line and I have come to see I am in an emotional abusive relationship with ABF who is now 3 months sober and I am his cheerleader. I am the one that is there for him constantly, giving him encouragement due to my fear of not seeing him succeed. Its like I am the one holding it...	joker	8	753	Jan 2, 2016 by missmeliss
	Courage to Change 1-2-2016 (Preview) Courage to Change reading for January 2 points out that turning to the alcoholic for affection and support is like going to the hardware store for bread.. We may have an expectation that a good parents should nurture us and support our feelings or a loving spouse comfort us and hold us when we are afra...	hotrod	3	2797	Jan 2, 2016 by Debb
	overthinking again (Preview) I will do my best to explain how I feel. My ABF quit drinking 3 months ago and has become very distant emotionally, very self centered and changes plans constantly. My head is spinning not getting confirmation of what is going on with him. Maybe I am finally seeing who he really is now and its not what I wan...	joker	4	862	Jan 2, 2016 by andromeda
	what Alcoholism has done to him (Preview) It is all so hard to explain how little things I can say to him can make him upset. He also has ptsd so any conflict between us he would rather just not talk about. Last night I just wanted us to sit on the couch together. We have talked about this before but for a few 'intimate' reasons he doesn't want to have r...	catlover26	5	762	Jan 2, 2016 by Iamhere
	Every week its something different... (Preview) Its been a couple of weeks since I last posted and as much as I hate to say it I feel like a broken record ....the on again off again merry go round...just gets exhaustng to the point that I dont even have to energy to get on the boards here or do even an online meeting. I swear every week its something differen...	Hopefull15	7	839	Jan 1, 2016 by Iamhere
	happy new year & i am sick... (Preview) I can't believe it! I am suffering from a head cold. Not a great way to celebrate...I even had plans for later today... I guess I will be down for awhile. Well...I went to bed earlier than expected. Didn't intend on staying up but life is funny... I woke up just after midnight... right after the firework...	Hoot Nanny	1	505	Jan 1, 2016 by Iamhere
	To all of my family here at MIP (Preview)	Broken513	4	535	Jan 1, 2016 by Debb
	Courage to Change Jan 1 (Preview) C2C reading for January 1 speaks about living in a society of instant gratification. Instant coffee instant money from the bank machine instant breakfast etc. It's everywhere we look. No wonder many of us arrived at Al-Anon looking for the instant answer to all our problems. Recovery is a process th...	hotrod	3	677	Jan 1, 2016 by Debb
	"How hard is it to be a wife and a mother?" (Preview) A great video about being a parent, more specifically a mother and wife... a woman is speaking to her young daughter. I watched it and decided it would be a good fit here for people to watch. Hope you enjoy it. Reply and let me know what you think of it, how it effected you, etc. "How hard is it being a wife a...	John	5	747	Jan 1, 2016 by Iamhere
	The New Year (Preview) Looking back at some of my posts it was quite a painful year,I shed a lot of tears,There were days the pain was so intense I didn't think I was going to survive it, But I did. I am discovering amazing things about myself,abilities I didn't even know I had.I am starting to really enjoy the changes that are co...	mjferg	6	713	Jan 1, 2016 by andromeda
	Breaking up with Alcoholic GF (Preview) Hi all, I've posted once or twice before, but mostly just spend time as a reader here. Hoping others could help chime in on what I'm experiencing (I'm sure many have!) and provide some advice. So...long story short, I've finally made the split from my Fiancee (we own a home together, no kids) and I am sta...	Heisenberg	7	973	Jan 1, 2016 by Heisenberg
	No expectations....and a little confused (Preview) Good morning...Long time no write..lol... In the church, I was taught ...If everything is going well in your life, something is wrong.......I was also taught to cast all your worries on Him...which is Let go Let God......and in the last 4 1/2 months I have been doing this. I have also been taught to tru...	Broken513	6	807	Dec 31, 2015 by Broken513
	New Year's Eve but (Preview) I am new to Al-Anon and I am confused by what my responsibility as the AH's Wife is supposed to be. He is currently at a treatment center. I have promised to stop drinking as well(not because I have a drinking problem but just for support)Well, my best friend and her husband are coming over tonight to spe...	Fresh	8	742	Dec 31, 2015 by Bethany66
	Courage to Change Reading 12-31 (Preview) The Courage to Change reading for December 31 speaks about the end of the year and suggests taking a few minutes to contemplate the progress that we have made.. It asks us to note what we did to contribute to our success. For example: we continue to attend meetings we've reached out to others for fello...	hotrod	2	807	Dec 31, 2015 by OceanTide
	If I explain am I controlling? (Preview) JADE is a concept I struggle with. I have made vast improvements in this area by minding my business and not encroaching on the decisions of my husband and my 2 20-something kids that live with us. This of course is confusing and sometimes infuriating my AH (sober 20+ years but no longer attends mtgs). M...	Thorn	5	867	Dec 31, 2015 by gingerfizz
	Struggling with relationship with Mom (Preview) My mom is not an alcoholic but lately I am struggling the most with my relationship with her. My mom raised me almost completely on her own. I lived with her full time and saw my dad on some weekends. We were extremely close. My mom has a mental illness she has struggled with my whole life. Two years a...	KT2015	4	702	Dec 31, 2015 by KT2015
	letting go,a real turning point (Preview) I have been struggling for quite some time now,struggling financially and emotionally. Life has been a real struggle this past year.I feel like I am in a little rowboat full of holes and i just keep patching the holes, I patch one and another one appears.I have way too many expenses for my income. So a co...	mjferg	9	891	Dec 31, 2015 by andromeda
	don't stay up... (Preview) I suggest that no one stays up to ring in the new year unless you want to. I personally need the sleep. Won't go anywhere to celebrate. Sparkling cider & alcohol free egg nog. Maybe some nuts & light snacks. I am actually looking forward to the new year. Let go of the old year & bring in the new....	Hoot Nanny	3	671	Dec 30, 2015 by Iamhere
	C2C reading 12-30 (Preview) The C2C reading for December 30 speaks about the negative things that other people say and do and how not to allow this to destroy our peace of mind. . It points out that we have" choices "and if we do not allow ourselves to respond to the negative words of a sick person, we will not be giving...	hotrod	4	556	Dec 30, 2015 by Iamhere
	A BIT BEWILDERED (Preview) So im grumpy from my cold and there is still lots to be done to whip this place into shape. i had the exterminaters come with no result so taking it in my own hands and intend to seal with caulk every crack and crevice in this whole place and set up with a resort of roach motels lol and attack directly with spra...	YARNCRAZY	2	727	Dec 30, 2015 by Iamhere
	celebrating the season (Preview) How is everyone going to celebrate the new year? I am considering a very sober celebration of the new year 2016! I am even turning 50 this coming year. I hope you all can cope w/ or w/o the drinking in your loved ones lives. I am hopeful for all of you. I am so grateful that Christmas is over only because I can g...	Hoot Nanny	7	714	Dec 30, 2015 by Thorn
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.