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Courage to change 4/4
(Preview)
Today's c2c speaks of how we can become so overwhelmed with worry and responsibility that we forget to enjoy the simple things. As a example, the reading describes how in their earlier life they had loved the stillness of mornings but that living with an alcohlic had tranformed their mornings into ju...
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missmeliss
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5
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527
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Groundhog day?
(Preview)
Is it normal at some point in your own recovery for it to be a struggle? Every day in and out having to be focusing on getting rid of the crazies? Is this is how the alcoholic feels? Its like a perpetual diet. No wonder there are relapses. Some days you want the hot fudge sundae I am hoping that someon...
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Fooled
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5
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438
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Powerless might be my new favorite word
(Preview)
Things have been hard here lately (well, for the past few years) and haven't gotten better. Last night I couldn't sleep, I was so mad and upset and scared that the marriage is over, that I'll never get well enough to leave my room, that my oldest kid will not make it through her medical issues, lots of thin...
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FHP
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9
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452
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Limbo, Stress, Complaining
(Preview)
It's been a couple months since I have gone to a meeting. I had two years though, which felt good. Perhaps I have issues with some of the meetings. While I find some constructive, others are not so. Being that my time is much limited and most meetings require a somewhat lengthy drive, I've found myself le...
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timepress
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6
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7465
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Using HALT
(Preview)
I've been doing really well with not counting AHs drinks. So we'll that I didn't even realize how intoxicated he was yesterday until I found myself smack in the middle of him trying to pick a fight. The last few days I can tell he's frustrated with me about something to do with things I haven't comple...
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KT2015
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8
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720
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AH is the FUN dad..
(Preview)
So after admitting he has a problem last night, my husband apparently kept my daughter home from school (3rd grade) again to go hiking. This is typical behavior on his end. He will do something to let us down as a family: Not pick up a kid after school because he was out hiking longer than he thought he woul...
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LeahLEOWife
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6
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459
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The one-sided house I live in ... and my new resolution
(Preview)
Hello everyone. I went to my first therapy/counseling session a week ago and that was a good thing. I have not made it to a F2F meeting yet but it's on my calendar now. I have been reading al-anon stuff voraciously. I went to the gym for the first time in .... oh well, we won't even say. I made myself a tiny goa...
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Fedora
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3
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318
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At least there was no fighting
(Preview)
Not sure, not even going to guess, but if I were to place a bet I would have to say that tomorrow the sobriety clock starts at again. At first I wasn't sure, so I just kept my mouth shut and watched during dinner. He asked me the same question 3 times!! He tried to keep a physical distance from me so I wouldn...
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Fooled
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6
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542
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feed back on this subject would be helpful.
(Preview)
I havent posted on here for a while but could do with some advice or feedback if possible. I have worked up to step 8 in my workbook and with the help of meetings and my friend and guide the vicar, I am now in a better place having taken time out for myself to heal from my estranged husband. He broke up with me a...
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annie5079
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1
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311
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Courage to Change 6/4
(Preview)
Today's C2C is highly topical for me, as I am in the midst of developing a cold right now!! It begins by likening the symptoms of a cold to the symptoms of alcoholism- such as blackouts and mood changes. The reading suggests that we too display similar symptoms to the alcoholic with our obsession, anxi...
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missmeliss
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2
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370
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Disrespectful
(Preview)
Hi All, It's been a few weeks since I've been active on here - been busy at different doctors and just lots of resting (to my dismay). No new news re the physical illness, but a few updates re ex-A fiancé. The guy I remember made a bit of an appearance (not in person). He called several times and when I didn...
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Jaclyn
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10
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585
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Getting Even..?
(Preview)
So I am new here. Kinda pissed I have to be here, but at the same time I am glad there is somewhere I can go to get a sanity check. Why didn't I come here years ago? My husband and I have been going to marriage counseling after he had an affair. It was very hard for me to deal with - the affair. For years, he has been...
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LeahLEOWife
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12
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446
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Another one lost to addiction......
(Preview)
I'm so very sad. The very first person who welcomed me into program has lost her son to addiction. My heart breaks for her and the family. I don't usually cry when others lose their kids in program but I know this woman. She was the first person I asked to be my sponsor and I always wanted to see her at my e...
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andromeda
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7
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474
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The "Family Disease"
(
1 2 3
)
(Preview)
I'm the alcoholic in the family. I haven't had a drink in 20 years (April 1, 1996), but stopped going to meetings years ago. I've been a dry drunk for the last 15 years. I've recently started going back to meetings, getting a new sponsor, working the steps, and feeling better and better about myself....
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Michael72
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97
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8373
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Ships in the night.
(Preview)
Oh sigh. So the guy next door (nice, super friendly, kind of crazy and obvious drug habit) hasn't been around for over a week and I've been concerned because no-one has moved any stuff out, he took his dogs, didn't ask me to keep an eye on the place etc and hasn't replied to texts..all out of character. Wel...
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missmeliss
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4
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405
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Very weird morning but coping
(Preview)
Today is my day off work for the first day in 6 days. On these days I normally get up when my dog tells me she needs to go out to urinate about 7 AM so I get another hour sleep from my normal 6 AM wake up time for work. This morning at 4:30 AM my dog started barking and growling at the window looking out toward the fr...
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Doves
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10
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448
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Very Sad ****warning - Suicide Mentioned ****
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I know I don't post often anymore, but I still read your posts at least daily (and sometimes twice daily). My life has been amazingly better and my AH has been in recovery for almost a year now. His sobriety date is the 11th, so we are almost there. When he was in the worst place imaginable f...
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Doingmybest
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7
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812
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A mad house, but the good kind :-)
(Preview)
Well, this morning I was meant to have an annoying appointment, which I was grumpy about, and then it was cancelled at the last minute, yay!! Daughter was having some kind of mental breakdown because we haven't been to the gym for a week and today she had friends coming over to stay tonight which was goin...
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missmeliss
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2
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707
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Hope for Today April 5
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Today's reading is about our acronym HALT: are we Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired. For me this has always been such a good and direct way to check in with myself about how I am feeling. I still have difficulty being direct -- especially with myself! I am reminded of my teenaged d...
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yanksfan51
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2
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404
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The Wheels on the Bus... Go Round & Round.. :)
(Preview)
Hello MIP Family... This Last Month has been an Up & Down Roller Coaster.. I Remind Myself Daily that Things can Always Be Worse, and Truly on the Surface they are Really Not Horrible, but still pull at the Heart Strings pretty Regular... My Shining Star, My Son who I was Going to SAVE (Insert Sarca...
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Jozie
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10
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576
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Still confused on something
(Preview)
I just ordered the book "Getting Them Sober" for some answers.. but still in the meantime I am so confused as to what I say or do the next day when he wakes up and says sorry, he is tired of disappointing us and that he just had a relapse and that he is doing his best. (he is trying to get sober) I use to get rea...
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Aerin
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4
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432
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testing
(Preview)
I keep getting a message to say my IP has been blocked, so, just testing to see if I can post  Smooches!!! Looks like it worked but I continue to get the message saying all posts from my IP address have been blocked because of suspect activity. Anyone else experiencing this issue? -- Edited by missmeli...
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missmeliss
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7
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406
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some of my co-dependent relapse signs
(Preview)
Well, thank you school bus driver for bringing some of my sickness to my attention again in order to take action.
I still fear the elephant and close my eyes.
Then I procrastinate.
Then I spend days, weeks, months and years still closing my eyes and panicking because the elephant gets bigger and big...
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a4l
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4
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516
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Sad tonight.
(Preview)
Went to get daughter from my mums tonight (My mum picked her up from her dads). It was a long way to go, on what was meant to be my first day off in ages, but daughter had sent me so many distress calls from her dads telling me that she was miserable that there was no way I could not go. Plus mother had offered di...
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missmeliss
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13
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639
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lost my serenity..when will I learn?
(Preview)
This morning was not awesome. My son gets collected for his autism intervention class twice a week. I have had some issues with the driver, who is rude and not the sharpest tool in the shed. This morning daughter had a dental appointment. I made the time for 9.30. Yesterday the driver was here at 8.50. He...
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a4l
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14
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727
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Detaching With Love
(Preview)
The solution to obsessiveness is to learn to detach with love. Detaching with love doesnt mean that you stop loving the other person. It means that you make a decision to back up and stop putting all of your time and energy focusing on someone else. It means not allowing the drama of someone elses addict...
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LinSC
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6
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529
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Just Wanted To Share
(Preview)
I'm taking college classes online. One of my current classes is "Marriage and Family" for my Humanities credits. In my required reading for this week, there was a chapter about the Social Exchange Theory. Basically, its saying that in a marriage, a person would only want to stay in the marriage if...
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WhiskeyLullabye
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3
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367
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Yoo hoo
(Preview)
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el-cee
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8
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460
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Very Angry
(Preview)
It takes a lot to get me mad. Right now, I'm furious. I mentioned that I live in a very small town, right? I have a friend who works in the HR department at Wal*Mart. I asked him if he could tell me why J was fired. He told me confidentially and I can never prove that he said it and he could get into trouble fo...
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WhiskeyLullabye
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7
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478
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introduction and question
(Preview)
Hi all! I am new to this Forum. My story is an interesting one although it may sound a bit over the top. My husband started drinking in 2009 and finally he chose to go to rehab in March 2015. We have three children. During the last 3 years of his active alcoholism (2012-2015) he was having an affair with his...
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hopeful987
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6
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604
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Courage to Change 4-3-2016
(Preview)
The C2C reading for April 3 Speaks about the fact that at the beginning of this alanon journey, the fear of attending Al-Anon meetings was huge and at times overwhelming . Our biggest fear was that someone we knew would be there and know our secrets. It points out that the principles embodied in A...
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hotrod
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4
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435
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My BF is 3 months sober...and I am not happy
(Preview)
My BF and I have been together for about a year and a half. Most of that time he was a high functioning alcoholic. It really didn't sink in until he moved in with me and I saw that it wasn't just a weekend thing. We had fought about his "heavy drinking" prior to his moving in but nothing changed. I know - I s...
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z88174
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10
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1530
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I need advice
(Preview)
I need advice. I've been with my boyfriend for about 11 months now and we've been living together for about 9 months. I'm not a drinker at all and when I met him, he was like, "Yeah, you're not a drinker and I don't want to drink anymore." He doesn't drink all the time, but when he does, I get concerned about...
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justwondering
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4
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371
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Courage to Change (C2C) 4/1/16
(Preview)
Good morning MIP family! The C2C had no reading for today so no summary...... JK - April Fool's!!! Today's reading talks about Acceptance being one part of the three A's - Awareness, Acceptance and Action. We might be inclined to jump from awareness to action without even pausing for acceptance...
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Iamhere
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2
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431
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Ok is now my favorite word.
(Preview)
At Christmas time before I really knew what I was dealing with in regards to my A, I had already made the decision I wanted to change things and start living the way I wanted to. My A Son had already moved in with his father and I was detaching with love. My A stepson had a home of his own and we were okay with...
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Fooled
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4
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504
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finding the lesson from the chaos I helped create....
(Preview)
I was sitting here typing up the hell-ish day I had with my exABF; each time I type a sentence I erase. Realizing how ridiculous my decision have been to get me to this level of chaos that I am facing right now. I am still trying to control things despite us not even being together. However; he moved out b...
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Crau
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4
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450
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Miraculous half a day. Thanks HP and Al Anon, AA too
(Preview)
Breathing rich, fresh air. What a wonderful half day so far. A is sleeping, waking up sleeping. In between, he is doing v useful things for himself and for me. Took him out for a morning ride when we had wonderful breakfast (at 1/5 the cost. V imp. He usually likes only expensive breakfast.) He was happy t...
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manas
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5
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469
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okay ladies does your mind work this way?
(Preview)
So, I haven't dated in a looong time. I have been asked out to dinner. I consider him a friend, we have known each other for a while. We actually went to school together, so we talked every day. I was very comfortable talking to him. I don't see any red flags as far as temperament.He was very respectful. I wo...
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mjferg
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26
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743
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When It Rains, It Pours
(Preview)
J got fired today. And, it had nothing to do with his drinking. He has not once been drunk at work. I know he hasn't because I was taking him and picking him up. Small towns are a pain. He worked at Wal*Mart. My ex-husband's sister works there. She said something about him to management and they fire...
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WhiskeyLullabye
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2
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438
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mixed feelings and guilt
(Preview)
I am having a rough day today. My mom is in a nursing home and has been having some problems with her feeding tube, she stopped eating so they feed her now. She always took very good care of herself, she only ate very healthy foods and didn't smoke, kept her weight down,etc. Basically a very health conscio...
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mjferg
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4
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623
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Feeling hopeful
(Preview)
J came over last night for a short while. He was completely sober. We spent some time cuddling and talking - basically just enjoying each other's company. I never feel better than when I'm laying next to him with my head on his chest and his arms around me. I think that's why this semi-separation is s...
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WhiskeyLullabye
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5
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482
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First step
(Preview)
I've been thinking about the 1st step a lot lately. To me powerlessness over the alcoholic or his behaviour used to mean defeat so I kept on trying to employ various tactics to gain power over this disease and my sons actions therein. And of course my "tactics " only made the situation worse, escalated t...
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Doves
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3
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422
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Ehe ..
(Preview)
This has been a tough week in terms of emotionally for me, I think there is a lot going on .. lol. Easter, birthdays trying to complete a few things knowing that the attorney still won't be done until May. Last night my boy was the social kid, he did a dance with his "new" girlfriend .. LOL. I did tell him...
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SerenityRUS
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8
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430
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Courage to Change Reading 4-2
(Preview)
The C2C reading for April 2 speaks about being gentle with ourselves in times of crisis. We may be able to push ourselves hard when things are going well, but we invite trouble if we try to do this when we are struggling to manage the basic activities of life. The reading points out that we often feel that...
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hotrod
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3
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2714
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Gah.
(Preview)
Oh what a fun week. Today was the pinnacle. This morning I had a very important exam, in town, so I studied until late last night, slept a little then got up early and went to town. Very hard to concentrate with all of the face-ache drama going on but, I think I passed. After the exam I was desperate to get hom...
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missmeliss
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4
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442
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Last Day On A Miserable Job
(Preview)
I just need to ask for some support if possible. I finally got another job in a new department, same company. I have worked here in this one for 2 years. We order for over 100 clinics and the entire hospital.the ladies are so self centered and being only 4 of us, we have 2 that take off repeatedly, are rude, e...
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TrishaG
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9
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490
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Trying to let go let God
(Preview)
Last night my teen son who binge drinks on weekends with his friends and I can only estimate from what I've seen smokes weed 2-4 times a week came home after school and work and announced that he is probably going to buy a car tomorrow ( which is now today)! He only has his G1 driver license (equivalent to th...
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Doves
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6
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660
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I just knew I could pull it off and it still slays me...April Fooling....
(Preview)
I was sitting at the breakfast table in deep decision as to whether I should do it or not and then...truth is I could not not do it. What was the "it"...and April fools joke with my spouse. Her back was to me washing dishes and so I started, "That was a weird way to wake up this morning with a Mo`o (house l...
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Jerry F
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5
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467
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Alanon Meeting
(Preview)
I am REALLY bad at the whole time zone thing. I live in Missouri, which I think is central time? So if the meeting is 9pm eastern time tonight, that would make it 8 am my time? Right? I hope that's right. I want to participate. It will be my first ever meeting. I told my boyfriend this morning that I wa...
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WhiskeyLullabye
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1
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311
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It finally happened
(Preview)
he got high. I could tell as soon as he answered the phone. so of course I had to prove it by FaceTiming him. I can always tell even just a little. It's that fake pot chemical crap. He lied- he's fine just tired yada yada yada. I just hung up. I face timed back. I asked him why he was lying when we agreed to be ho...
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kspec85
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7
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614
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My boyfriend is an alcoholic
(Preview)
Right now I'm completely heartbroken. I've known that my boyfriend had a drinking problem for a long time. About 5 years ago, he lost his license for drinking and driving. I've been trying to support him and help him through it, but there are some things I won't accept and I made those clear. One of t...
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WhiskeyLullabye
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9
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589
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New and need to find support
(Preview)
Hi all. I'm new here. Not sure where to start, but I guess background first. My husband is 42, I am 40,we've been together 3 years, married for one. I have 3 daughters (18 & 16 y/o twins) and he has one son (13). The girls live with us, his son is in AZ. We moved to Germany almost 4 months ago. This is the s...
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Peaf
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6
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599
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Dear Higher Power...
(Preview)
Thank you for the many gifts I have in my life today. I most likely always had gifts but was too sick to see them. Not physically sick but spiritually and mentally sick. My distrubed and distorted thinking caused by the disease of alcoholism filtering through the generations of my own family acted like...
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el-cee
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4
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395
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Just need advice from people in similar situations.
(Preview)
I have been with my fiancé for 3 years now.. I have a son from before and we have a daughter together. I knew he liked to party when we met and due to me having my son at an early age I was intrigued by this environment. It was not an everyday thing and he seemed fine when we were out. It was a few months into da...
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Layla Marie
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3
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862
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At wits end, don't even want to go home
(Preview)
Hi all My husband's drinking happens everyday. This desease is way bigger than him now. Right now I cannot even ask him a simple question he is out of it. I've gone thru so many apologies, then the very next day BOOM he's at it again. I am going to a depression group, on meds that don't help me calm down while...
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Worried Wife
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5
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508
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Responding vs Reacting
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, I've been working through some disappointment concerning a new job I accepted and have now left. I've been inventorying myself, looking at where red flags might have been present in the interview process. I have found a few and realize I should have resisted accepting this job. Some red...
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tiredtonite
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3
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907
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When an adult child is an alcoholic
(Preview)
Hi, everyone. This is my first time here. My twenty-seven-year-old daughter who works and lives out of the house is an alcoholic. She was diagnosed with OCD and depressive tendencies about eight years ago and was on medication that was no longer working. She said she turned to alcohol to cure her anxi...
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Hope4Healing
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14
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665
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Get up and go still hasnt come back
(Preview)
Even before AH went to rehab in January he came home from work and plopped on the couch and slept. Every household responsibility fell on me. He has always admitted he is a napper. Now since he has been home for about 7 weeks, this behavior has returned. I have to nag him to get anything completed....
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Fooled
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4
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507
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Trying to understand
(Preview)
Since the last ABF last binge, I have lost all feelings of love and respect toward him. I look at him and I am disgusted and I think to myself, what a loser he is. He has nothing worthwhile to give to me and what am I doing with him? I deserve better, not a selfish jerk that only has one thought, alcohol. I am try...
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joker
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6
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664
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High Functioning Alcoholic husband
(Preview)
It's taken me 6 years to realize my husband is a HFA and marijuana addict. 6 years of a rollercoaster and i'm only just getting help for myself - just finding out that i'm not as crazy as he told me i was. I'm so relieved by everyone's posts - to know that it's not just me, but that so many are suffering t...
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jilld30
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6
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2480
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