Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Freetime · Freetime

Today's writer in Hope for Today learned that, when listing all persons they had harmed, to put their own name on the list for amends. Making amends would mean changing their harmful behaviors, and it couldn't be done all at once. It had to be done in small steps, and they could forgive themselves for...

Skorpi · Skorpi

In today's reading, the author shares how living with alcoholism is like living through a tornado. Not only do you have to watch out for the tornado, but also for what the tornado picks up and hurls at you! Alcoholism often brings with it other problems, like verbal, physical, and sexual abuse, illnes...

Youknowme · Youknowme

Today's reading speaks of limited thinking, and how we can become lost in our predicted outcomes, and feel hopeless. But we can't possibly imagine all possible outcomes, so when we feel trapped in our limited thinking, that's when it's time to turn it over to our HP. Often, this is when miracles happe...

Tude · Tude

Hi everyone. I did the disappearing act and got bit in the rear. Actually things have been ok till aging parents and not knowing boundaries that let the mind give it an leave it with HP Do y'all think I should be in alanon or acoa? I appreciate the input. Brass tacks is it's me that has to change but not s...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Comments of gratitude at Alanon meetings helped this member refocus by turning away from worry and the business of others to see beauty that is all around and feel the hope of obtaining Serenity. We cannot carry the burden of others; trying to only ensures a decrease in our emotional bandwidth. Remi...

WendyP · WendyP

Hi MIP members, on reading this sharing, it talks about 'working a program", and what we have to do is to practice what we are learning,,,,, and being around people who speak and understand the language to be able to use it, and apply it to our lives. For myself, I know that anyone can be my teacher, if I kee...

Lyne · Lyne

The writer says that confusion can be a gift from God. Often if we feel we need an immediate answer, it may not be the right time to take action. It's possible when we become really ready to act, the information will be presented. Knowing too much about options can drive us crazy. The writer suggests...

Freetime · Freetime

Today's reading in Courage to Change reflects on the actions mentioned in Tradition Five. Practicing the Twelve Steps ourselves can give us the healing of compassionate self-love, perhaps through recognizing a loving higher power. Building on the strength of that self-love, we might be able to...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reflection starts at the end of the page with the Thought for the Day: I tried to get God to listen to me through my prayers. He did, once I stopped telling Him what to do. The writer describes evolution of prayer from: praying not to be punished by God, to praying for specif...

WendyP · WendyP

Hi to all on MIP, I hope this day is good and Serene to all. On reading in my Hope For Today on Feb, 3rd, it brought back memories to me as to how I was back then, and how I am today. I had many questions for myself, some good and some proving that I am a works in progress. The person talks about her Grand Fat...

Youknowme · Youknowme

Today's reading talks of creativity and of using creativity to express and come to know our true selves, as well as a means of replacing negative thinking with positive action. Further, it reminds us that creativity (whether it's building something, gardening, cooking, or finding new ways of doin...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! Today's reading is one for me

The author shares that before they came to Al-Anon, nothing was simple about their life. Work was stressful, time was short, and the author's attention was focused on the alcoholic. As the author shifted their focus from the alcoholic to the program, the...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

First impressions of Alanon from today's writer after seeing more smiles, happiness than 'should' be among those with past or current alcoholics: they must not have had it as bad as me.If we stick around Alanon long enough, we realize that is not often the case, and that does not even matter. What matt...

Lyne · Lyne

The member says that each day one can contribute to their sense of well-being by taking even a small action--you can strengthen a relationship, pursue a goal, or help yourself feel better about you. You cannot dramatically change your life, but you can have a goal to move in a positive direction. Ma...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about the importance of our relationship to the God of our understanding. The writer distinguishes between acknowledging the presence of God and actually finding a spiritual connection. Through prayer and meditation a more consistent relationship wit...

Freetime · Freetime

Today's author in Hope for Today has learned how to find serenity no matter what chaos is going on around them. Small choices can bring in serenity at any time. Examples are waking up early to quietly watch the sunrise, ducking out of a family gathering to go to another room for a few minutes and say the...

Youknowme · Youknowme

Today's reading talks of the writer's initial distaste of the concept of serenity, and how dull and useless serenity sounded compared to useful solutions such as curing the alcoholic, or paying the bills! But after spending some time working through the al-anon program, they came to realise that s...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

The role of intent in the in/action we take toward the alcoholic is considered in today's page. It is an attempt to control if we hope/expect to have an outcome on another's drinking, ensuring continued lack of serenity regardless of outcome. If we follow Alanon's suggestion that we attempt to make c...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Greetings all. We appear to have lost our member who was providing a thread/topic/discussion on Saturdays. If anyone has a desire to be of service, Saturday is open! All that's suggested is that you pick a daily reader from our program literature and then post your thoughts/ESH on it for others to e...

WendyP · WendyP

Hi, it is WendyP, awhile ago I was wanting to send a friend of mine a reading that helped me get through an issue that was causing me great pain, and I thought that it might help them also. I could not remember where I had seen it, and because I am a determined person, and wanted to find it for myself as well, I d...

Lyne · Lyne

This reading discusses how hard we can work our program and still have lapses of self-pity and resentment. It is therefore important to include our Higher Power to overcome these lapses. Reminder: I want to be ready for shortcomings to be removed and I will do what I can to prepare. I can develop a no...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: Todays reading is a focus on the ways we might practice choosing serenity in our lives. The writer describes how many of us who have lived with alcoholism become as obsessed with the alcoholic and his/her behavior as the alcoholic is consumed with alcohol. One of the strateg...

Freetime · Freetime

Today's reading in Courage to Change says that newcomers may be surprised by the number of years that some members have been in Al-Anon. Some no longer have an active alcoholic or a living alcoholic in their life. And yet they keep coming back. The writer sometimes goes through times of doubt, rebel...

Youknowme · Youknowme

In today's C2C reading. the writer recalls being so angry about dishes piling up in the sink that they were ready to end a deeply valued relationship. But after sharing the problem with a friend, they realised that the dishes were symbolic of all of the problems within the relationship which felt over...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shares some reflections on the 12th Step: Having had a Spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to others, and to practice these principles in all our affairs. The author shares that they found real promise and hope in...

Youknowme · Youknowme

Today my baby girl turns 19. Last night she and I went to the movies- she drove us there and back- and today she has gone to get (another) tattoo (insert serenity prayer here). Yes, she is that grown up now, and I couldn't be more proud of her, nor grateful for the magical gift she seems to have for transmuti...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Interesting read today considering the subtle, but important difference between trying to use willpower to suppress and eliminate a fault, versus using the natural but unwanted fault tendency to point to the opposite, preferred quality or tendency.Spoiler alert: the latter is more successful...

Lyne · Lyne

The writer says when they came to program, they thought the drinker could stop by sheer will power. As they learned that the alcoholic suffers from a disease, why did the writer still speak to the drinker as a "bad'' person? The writer knows the alcoholic is a good and sensitive human, but the writer h...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: Todays reading is a focus on gratitude. The writer describes gratitude as a gift received through being part of the alanon program. Before the program the writer thought of gratitude as happiness when life happened based on (the writers) wants and needs. Over time, throug...

NewGirl1717 · NewGirl1717

I tested positive for covid on Sunday. I feel awful physically. I am staying home for the next 5 days from work. It has been awful being at home. My bf has me locked away in our bedroom and doesn't let me out. He says he doesn't want to risk getting infected. I've been drinking water from the tap and I had a hal...

Freetime · Freetime

Today's reading in One Day at a Time in Al-Anon explains that comparing myself, my lot in life, with others leads to self-pity or resentment. Relying on others to applaud or admire me makes me dependent on others for my own contentment. Real contentment comes from looking at myself and seeing that my...

Youknowme · Youknowme

Today's reading is about the importance of anonymity. It speaks of leaving behind labels and everything that comes with them. When I first came to al-anon, I wanted people to hear me and know who I was. I didn't really understand the concept of anonymity, because I was so anxious for people to hear me. I...

Skorpi · Skorpi

In today's reading, the author suggests that letting go of self-condemnation could help us to love ourselves more. It IS important to identify and recognize flaws, but focusing on the too much can be detrimental to progress. Every tiny step moves us closer to wholeness, health, and serenity. Takin...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Many come to Alanon with a desperate desire to help their qualifier, the alcoholic. Upon hearing Alnon's suggestion to keep the focus on ourselves, some conclude, prematurely, that such an approach can only be heartless.One such member waited long enough to consider another possibility: the nat...

Lyne · Lyne

The writer describes murderous weapons towards the alcoholic as: indignation in a strident voice, irresponsible accusations, nagging, tears, hysteria, self-righteousness, etc. These weapons are a killer for the alcoholic to look for a better life, they kill love and respect, they cause unb...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about the importance of humility in our growth. The writer describes having trouble early in the program with understanding how to develop humility. The writer decided to put the focus on being teachable- and what could be changed within in order to becom...

Lyne · Lyne

My A has decided to blame me for her drinking. I know Im not to blame for her alcohol use. Im to blame for 5 yrs of living half-time near my son, which causes her pain. I have apologized several times for causing her pain. However, there are at least 35 years that I either did not know her and did not live...

JerryF · JerryF

I haven't checked in with the board lately David and have cause to do so now as I have heard what is happening regarding sub-surface volcanos in your area. They haven't mentioned anything that I have read about your neighborhood and I am beyond curious for the present. If you get and can read this ple...

Wolfie55 · Wolfie55

Just finished chairing an alanon meeting, on zoom. I mentioned this in one of my shares that when I originally started attending that meeting, I felt like an AA member going to an alanon meeting, but over the past year or so they have made me feel very welcome. One member gave me a little push and I started...

Freetime · Freetime

Today's reading in Hope for Today takes a look at setting limits -- boundaries -- around unacceptable behavior. The author sometimes fears that if they set a limit with someone, they will be abandoned. Sometimes they set rigid boundaries in hopes of eliminating the problem forever. Their most su...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Greetings all. We have an open day for which there is no daily reading/share - Thursday(s). If one or two are willing to do this (split this), feel free to either respond here or send me a PM. Happy Thursday!

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading the author reflects on how a bee hive can teach the lesson of detachment - when a colony of bees is at work, as long as one keeps a safe distance and doesn't poke one's nose into the hive, we will be fine. The author reflects that it is their choice, when they sense that a situat...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's read relates a cautionary tale of a member who held the real and perceived woes of the day in countenance and in any conversation chanced upon. Every opportunity was taken to recount and relive the bad things that seemed to happen and the misdeeds of the alcoholic.Predictably, her encounter...

Lyne · Lyne

The writer describes what happens when we focus on worry and fear: we see terrifying pictures, hear paranoid voices, and have self-criticism. The more attention we give this static,we lose our foothold in reality, and nothing useful gets accomplished. We can break this cycle of worry and fear by...

Alanonpal · Alanonpal

Hi, my name is Frank I am looking for an online chat to help me. I am new to al-anon but need help starting out. I went to #al-anonchat on irc.chat4all.org . I was greeted by a few ppl there but they told me they could not be of help and i should find an online chat meeting. a person named Tahoe asked a lot of qu...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about our reactions to others and about understanding that we are responsible for our own happiness. The writer describes suffering in response to his/her partners alcoholic behavior. When the writer contacts his/her sponsor, the writer is told that a r...

WebHelper · WebHelper

Greetings MIP family. The chatroom feature of our board has been facing repeated problems of late. It would be appreciated if members could check out the link here to help us reconcile those problems and assess the function in general. Thank you!

Freetime · Freetime

Today's reading in Hope for Today takes a look at Al-Anon's beloved three C's about our powerlessness over alcoholism -- I didn't Cause It, I can't Control it, and I can't Cure it. To the author of this reading, embracing this slogan relieves them of the guilty feeling that they could have done mor...

Wolfie55 · Wolfie55

On Christmas Day, I chaired a zoom meeting in my district. Until recently, I haven't chaired any al-anon meetings but one day I put on my big boy pants and tried it. Wasn't too bad. I do it regularly and now I'm beginning to feel more a part of that group. It's not my home group. My home group has not held meet...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's C2C, the author shares about the meaning of "compassion." When the author first arrived at Al-Anon, they thought compassion meant making excuses or covering for the alcoholic. Through Al-Anon, the author learned that making excuses and covering for others is "enabling" -...

MaryFL · MaryFL

Hello, new to Alanon and this forum. Boundaries are something I am still learning and working on. I have a question though, if I set a boundary, say "I will stay at my parent's house if I feel unsafe" or "I will ask you to leave the relationship and house if you are not in active recovery, working steps an...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's writer recalls feelings of loneliness and desperation at time of Alanon discovery, of wanting the serenity that members there seemed to enjoy.The opportunity was not lost as the newcomer absorbed what had worked for others: Attending/sharing at meetings, work the Steps (in order, one at...

Lyne · Lyne

The writer of Mondays reading explores how to make positive changes: -ask, am I moving in a positive direction? -am I going to meetings and practicing the principles?-am I breaking out of unhealthy and unsatisfying patterns of the past? -can I set goals and take small risks on a daily basis? -can I ta...

DM2021 · DM2021

Sending my best wishes to the MIP Family for a very prosperous and enlightening 2022!!

Lyne · Lyne

Whats funny, but perhaps its more ironic, is that I can go for months in a mental state of letting go, live and let live, think, how important is it, etc. etc. etc. Since Christmas Eve, when my As drinking was apparent and in my face, I have not been able to let it go. So the question Im asking myself, after...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning everyone: And Happy New Year! Todays reading is about the power of the serenity prayer. The writer describes this as the first tool used in recovery. Not being able to alter the past, having the power to change our attitudes and resentments and having hope about the potential for our ow...

Youknowme · Youknowme

Funny how things come together. I posted a little while back about how I am writing a book about living through domestic violence and how I wasn't sure if I could or couldn't mention that al-anon was a HUGE part of my way out. That prompted some discussions and thinking about privacy and anonymity that I...

Freetime · Freetime

The December 31 reading in Hope for Today reflects on the consistently repeated phrases heard in the Suggested Welcome and Closing at Al-Anon meetings.No situation is really hopeless, and we can find contentment and even happiness whether the alcoholic is still drinking or notWe can put our prob...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shares that there are times when everything the alcoholic in their life does irritates them. It seems that the alcoholic even pours the breakfast cereal wrong! The author uses this as an opportunity to reflect on what is going on internally. Is there a revie...

Lyne · Lyne

The writer ponders the issue of facing different opinions, and what to do at that point: take a stance that one is right and one is wrong, defend oneself, take the disagreement personally, or be grateful that there are numerous ways of looking at life. The writer goes on to say if we can practice grati...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	February 18 - Hope for Today - Amends (Preview) Today's writer in Hope for Today learned that, when listing all persons they had harmed, to put their own name on the list for amends. Making amends would mean changing their harmful behaviors, and it couldn't be done all at once. It had to be done in small steps, and they could forgive themselves for...	Freetime	6	855	Feb 18, 2022 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change February 16 (Preview) In today's reading, the author shares how living with alcoholism is like living through a tornado. Not only do you have to watch out for the tornado, but also for what the tornado picks up and hurls at you! Alcoholism often brings with it other problems, like verbal, physical, and sexual abuse, illnes...	Skorpi	6	513	Feb 18, 2022 by Youknowme
	C2C Feb 17th (Preview) Today's reading speaks of limited thinking, and how we can become lost in our predicted outcomes, and feel hopeless. But we can't possibly imagine all possible outcomes, so when we feel trapped in our limited thinking, that's when it's time to turn it over to our HP. Often, this is when miracles happe...	Youknowme	4	1214	Feb 17, 2022 by Iamhere
	Hi and lurking again. (Preview) Hi everyone. I did the disappearing act and got bit in the rear. Actually things have been ok till aging parents and not knowing boundaries that let the mind give it an leave it with HP Do y'all think I should be in alanon or acoa? I appreciate the input. Brass tacks is it's me that has to change but not s...	Tude	6	2398	Feb 17, 2022 by Iamhere
	2/15/22 Bonus page: ODAT – Gratitude: Dims the Glare of Our Difficulties (Preview) Comments of gratitude at Alanon meetings helped this member refocus by turning away from worry and the business of others to see beauty that is all around and feel the hope of obtaining Serenity. We cannot carry the burden of others; trying to only ensures a decrease in our emotional bandwidth. Remi...	Enigmatic	7	561	Feb 17, 2022 by Iamhere
	Courage To Change, Feb, 15th. (Preview) Hi MIP members, on reading this sharing, it talks about 'working a program", and what we have to do is to practice what we are learning,,,,, and being around people who speak and understand the language to be able to use it, and apply it to our lives. For myself, I know that anyone can be my teacher, if I kee...	WendyP	3	1616	Feb 15, 2022 by SunnyFrog
	C2C Monday, 2/14, confusion? (Preview) The writer says that confusion can be a gift from God. Often if we feel we need an immediate answer, it may not be the right time to take action. It's possible when we become really ready to act, the information will be presented. Knowing too much about options can drive us crazy. The writer suggests...	Lyne	4	440	Feb 14, 2022 by Iamhere
	February 11 - C2C - Love and Compassion (Preview) Today's reading in Courage to Change reflects on the actions mentioned in Tradition Five. Practicing the Twelve Steps ourselves can give us the healing of compassionate self-love, perhaps through recognizing a loving higher power. Building on the strength of that self-love, we might be able to...	Freetime	8	1199	Feb 13, 2022 by SunnyFrog
	Hope for Today Feb 13 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reflection starts at the end of the page with the Thought for the Day: I tried to get God to listen to me through my prayers. He did, once I stopped telling Him what to do. The writer describes evolution of prayer from: praying not to be punished by God, to praying for specif...	yanksfan51	4	416	Feb 13, 2022 by Iamhere
	Learning To Love Myself. (Preview) Hi to all on MIP, I hope this day is good and Serene to all. On reading in my Hope For Today on Feb, 3rd, it brought back memories to me as to how I was back then, and how I am today. I had many questions for myself, some good and some proving that I am a works in progress. The person talks about her Grand Fat...	WendyP	4	1836	Feb 12, 2022 by PosiesandPuppies
	C2C Feb 10th The gifts of creativity and imagination. (Preview) Today's reading talks of creativity and of using creativity to express and come to know our true selves, as well as a means of replacing negative thinking with positive action. Further, it reminds us that creativity (whether it's building something, gardening, cooking, or finding new ways of doin...	Youknowme	4	436	Feb 12, 2022 by Lyne
	Courage to Change Feb. 9 (Preview) Hello MIP! Today's reading is one for me The author shares that before they came to Al-Anon, nothing was simple about their life. Work was stressful, time was short, and the author's attention was focused on the alcoholic. As the author shifted their focus from the alcoholic to the program, the...	Skorpi	5	1653	Feb 11, 2022 by Iamhere
	2/8/22 ODAT - We Are What We See (Preview) First impressions of Alanon from today's writer after seeing more smiles, happiness than 'should' be among those with past or current alcoholics: they must not have had it as bad as me.If we stick around Alanon long enough, we realize that is not often the case, and that does not even matter. What matt...	Enigmatic	4	1210	Feb 11, 2022 by Iamhere
	C2C, Monday, 2/7, contributing to my well-being (Preview) The member says that each day one can contribute to their sense of well-being by taking even a small action--you can strengthen a relationship, pursue a goal, or help yourself feel better about you. You cannot dramatically change your life, but you can have a goal to move in a positive direction. Ma...	Lyne	4	607	Feb 7, 2022 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today Feb 6 (Preview) Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about the importance of our relationship to the God of our understanding. The writer distinguishes between acknowledging the presence of God and actually finding a spiritual connection. Through prayer and meditation a more consistent relationship wit...	yanksfan51	2	2974	Feb 6, 2022 by DM2021
	February 4 - Hope for Today - Serenity Moments (Preview) Today's author in Hope for Today has learned how to find serenity no matter what chaos is going on around them. Small choices can bring in serenity at any time. Examples are waking up early to quietly watch the sunrise, ducking out of a family gathering to go to another room for a few minutes and say the...	Freetime	6	466	Feb 4, 2022 by Iamhere
	C2C Thursday 3rd Feb- Serenity (Preview) Today's reading talks of the writer's initial distaste of the concept of serenity, and how dull and useless serenity sounded compared to useful solutions such as curing the alcoholic, or paying the bills! But after spending some time working through the al-anon program, they came to realise that s...	Youknowme	4	452	Feb 3, 2022 by Iamhere
	2/1/22 C2C Right Thing, Wrong Reason? (Preview) The role of intent in the in/action we take toward the alcoholic is considered in today's page. It is an attempt to control if we hope/expect to have an outcome on another's drinking, ensuring continued lack of serenity regardless of outcome. If we follow Alanon's suggestion that we attempt to make c...	Enigmatic	4	2454	Feb 3, 2022 by Youknowme
	Saturday Service - Literature Daily Volunteer (Preview) Greetings all. We appear to have lost our member who was providing a thread/topic/discussion on Saturdays. If anyone has a desire to be of service, Saturday is open! All that's suggested is that you pick a daily reader from our program literature and then post your thoughts/ESH on it for others to e...	Iamhere	0	2617	Feb 2, 2022 by Iamhere
	Wealth of Help and Information (Preview) Hi, it is WendyP, awhile ago I was wanting to send a friend of mine a reading that helped me get through an issue that was causing me great pain, and I thought that it might help them also. I could not remember where I had seen it, and because I am a determined person, and wanted to find it for myself as well, I d...	WendyP	4	3547	Feb 1, 2022 by Iamhere
	C2C, Monday, 1/31, still have defects of character (Preview) This reading discusses how hard we can work our program and still have lapses of self-pity and resentment. It is therefore important to include our Higher Power to overcome these lapses. Reminder: I want to be ready for shortcomings to be removed and I will do what I can to prepare. I can develop a no...	Lyne	3	2563	Feb 1, 2022 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today Jan 30 (Preview) Good morning everyone: Todays reading is a focus on the ways we might practice choosing serenity in our lives. The writer describes how many of us who have lived with alcoholism become as obsessed with the alcoholic and his/her behavior as the alcoholic is consumed with alcohol. One of the strateg...	yanksfan51	2	1762	Jan 30, 2022 by DM2021
	January 28 - C2C - Keep Coming Back (Preview) Today's reading in Courage to Change says that newcomers may be surprised by the number of years that some members have been in Al-Anon. Some no longer have an active alcoholic or a living alcoholic in their life. And yet they keep coming back. The writer sometimes goes through times of doubt, rebel...	Freetime	4	439	Jan 28, 2022 by Iamhere
	C2C 27/1 (Preview) In today's C2C reading. the writer recalls being so angry about dishes piling up in the sink that they were ready to end a deeply valued relationship. But after sharing the problem with a friend, they realised that the dishes were symbolic of all of the problems within the relationship which felt over...	Youknowme	6	461	Jan 28, 2022 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change January 26 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shares some reflections on the 12th Step: Having had a Spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to others, and to practice these principles in all our affairs. The author shares that they found real promise and hope in...	Skorpi	4	1734	Jan 28, 2022 by Iamhere
	Gratitude (Preview) Today my baby girl turns 19. Last night she and I went to the movies- she drove us there and back- and today she has gone to get (another) tattoo (insert serenity prayer here). Yes, she is that grown up now, and I couldn't be more proud of her, nor grateful for the magical gift she seems to have for transmuti...	Youknowme	4	954	Jan 28, 2022 by Iamhere
	1/25/22 ODAT – Abracadabra vs Judo (Preview) Interesting read today considering the subtle, but important difference between trying to use willpower to suppress and eliminate a fault, versus using the natural but unwanted fault tendency to point to the opposite, preferred quality or tendency.Spoiler alert: the latter is more successful...	Enigmatic	3	455	Jan 25, 2022 by Iamhere
	ODAT in alanon, Monday, 1/24, why can't you stop drinking? (Preview) The writer says when they came to program, they thought the drinker could stop by sheer will power. As they learned that the alcoholic suffers from a disease, why did the writer still speak to the drinker as a "bad'' person? The writer knows the alcoholic is a good and sensitive human, but the writer h...	Lyne	4	892	Jan 24, 2022 by Youknowme
	Hope for Today Jan 23 (Preview) Good morning everyone: Todays reading is a focus on gratitude. The writer describes gratitude as a gift received through being part of the alanon program. Before the program the writer thought of gratitude as happiness when life happened based on (the writers) wants and needs. Over time, throug...	yanksfan51	4	1183	Jan 23, 2022 by Iamhere
	Trying to care for myself (Preview) I tested positive for covid on Sunday. I feel awful physically. I am staying home for the next 5 days from work. It has been awful being at home. My bf has me locked away in our bedroom and doesn't let me out. He says he doesn't want to risk getting infected. I've been drinking water from the tap and I had a hal...	NewGirl1717	11	1895	Jan 22, 2022 by PosiesandPuppies
	January 21 - ODAT - Comparison (Preview) Today's reading in One Day at a Time in Al-Anon explains that comparing myself, my lot in life, with others leads to self-pity or resentment. Relying on others to applaud or admire me makes me dependent on others for my own contentment. Real contentment comes from looking at myself and seeing that my...	Freetime	3	845	Jan 22, 2022 by Lyne
	c2c 20/1 (Preview) Today's reading is about the importance of anonymity. It speaks of leaving behind labels and everything that comes with them. When I first came to al-anon, I wanted people to hear me and know who I was. I didn't really understand the concept of anonymity, because I was so anxious for people to hear me. I...	Youknowme	5	2209	Jan 21, 2022 by serenity47
	Courage to Change January 19 (Preview) In today's reading, the author suggests that letting go of self-condemnation could help us to love ourselves more. It IS important to identify and recognize flaws, but focusing on the too much can be detrimental to progress. Every tiny step moves us closer to wholeness, health, and serenity. Takin...	Skorpi	3	1672	Jan 20, 2022 by Iamhere
	1/18/22 C2C Best Way to Help Qualifier: Focus on Self? (Preview) Many come to Alanon with a desperate desire to help their qualifier, the alcoholic. Upon hearing Alnon's suggestion to keep the focus on ourselves, some conclude, prematurely, that such an approach can only be heartless.One such member waited long enough to consider another possibility: the nat...	Enigmatic	5	436	Jan 18, 2022 by Iamhere
	ODAT in alanon, Monday 1/17, murderous weapons (Preview) The writer describes murderous weapons towards the alcoholic as: indignation in a strident voice, irresponsible accusations, nagging, tears, hysteria, self-righteousness, etc. These weapons are a killer for the alcoholic to look for a better life, they kill love and respect, they cause unb...	Lyne	2	2592	Jan 17, 2022 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today Jan 16 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about the importance of humility in our growth. The writer describes having trouble early in the program with understanding how to develop humility. The writer decided to put the focus on being teachable- and what could be changed within in order to becom...	yanksfan51	6	479	Jan 16, 2022 by Iamhere
	ESH please (Preview) My A has decided to blame me for her drinking. I know Im not to blame for her alcohol use. Im to blame for 5 yrs of living half-time near my son, which causes her pain. I have apologized several times for causing her pain. However, there are at least 35 years that I either did not know her and did not live...	Lyne	5	1656	Jan 16, 2022 by Lyne
	David G (Preview) I haven't checked in with the board lately David and have cause to do so now as I have heard what is happening regarding sub-surface volcanos in your area. They haven't mentioned anything that I have read about your neighborhood and I am beyond curious for the present. If you get and can read this ple...	JerryF	3	1823	Jan 16, 2022 by Iamhere
	Participation is the key to Harmony (Preview) Just finished chairing an alanon meeting, on zoom. I mentioned this in one of my shares that when I originally started attending that meeting, I felt like an AA member going to an alanon meeting, but over the past year or so they have made me feel very welcome. One member gave me a little push and I started...	Wolfie55	2	1797	Jan 15, 2022 by Iamhere
	January 14 - Hope for Today - Boundaries (Preview) Today's reading in Hope for Today takes a look at setting limits -- boundaries -- around unacceptable behavior. The author sometimes fears that if they set a limit with someone, they will be abandoned. Sometimes they set rigid boundaries in hopes of eliminating the problem forever. Their most su...	Freetime	5	1342	Jan 14, 2022 by DM2021
	Volunteer for Daily Reader/Share on Thursdays (Preview) Greetings all. We have an open day for which there is no daily reading/share - Thursday(s). If one or two are willing to do this (split this), feel free to either respond here or send me a PM. Happy Thursday!	Iamhere	6	1157	Jan 14, 2022 by DM2021
	Courage to Change January 12 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading the author reflects on how a bee hive can teach the lesson of detachment - when a colony of bees is at work, as long as one keeps a safe distance and doesn't poke one's nose into the hive, we will be fine. The author reflects that it is their choice, when they sense that a situat...	Skorpi	5	514	Jan 12, 2022 by Iamhere
	1/11/22 Say Something Often Enough... (Preview) Today's read relates a cautionary tale of a member who held the real and perceived woes of the day in countenance and in any conversation chanced upon. Every opportunity was taken to recount and relive the bad things that seemed to happen and the misdeeds of the alcoholic.Predictably, her encounter...	Enigmatic	5	544	Jan 11, 2022 by Iamhere
	C2C, Monday, 1/10, worry and fear (Preview) The writer describes what happens when we focus on worry and fear: we see terrifying pictures, hear paranoid voices, and have self-criticism. The more attention we give this static,we lose our foothold in reality, and nothing useful gets accomplished. We can break this cycle of worry and fear by...	Lyne	2	1595	Jan 10, 2022 by Iamhere
	Looking 4 online chat help (Preview) Hi, my name is Frank I am looking for an online chat to help me. I am new to al-anon but need help starting out. I went to #al-anonchat on irc.chat4all.org . I was greeted by a few ppl there but they told me they could not be of help and i should find an online chat meeting. a person named Tahoe asked a lot of qu...	Alanonpal	9	3592	Jan 9, 2022 by Tahoe1
	Hope for Today Jan 9 (Preview) Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about our reactions to others and about understanding that we are responsible for our own happiness. The writer describes suffering in response to his/her partners alcoholic behavior. When the writer contacts his/her sponsor, the writer is told that a r...	yanksfan51	3	524	Jan 9, 2022 by PosiesandPuppies
	Member input sought on the business board. (Preview) Greetings MIP family. The chatroom feature of our board has been facing repeated problems of late. It would be appreciated if members could check out the link here to help us reconcile those problems and assess the function in general. Thank you!	WebHelper	1	1916	Jan 9, 2022 by Lyne
	January 7 - Hope for Today - The 3 C's (Preview) Today's reading in Hope for Today takes a look at Al-Anon's beloved three C's about our powerlessness over alcoholism -- I didn't Cause It, I can't Control it, and I can't Cure it. To the author of this reading, embracing this slogan relieves them of the guilty feeling that they could have done mor...	Freetime	4	1881	Jan 8, 2022 by Lyne
	Importance of A Group (Preview) On Christmas Day, I chaired a zoom meeting in my district. Until recently, I haven't chaired any al-anon meetings but one day I put on my big boy pants and tried it. Wasn't too bad. I do it regularly and now I'm beginning to feel more a part of that group. It's not my home group. My home group has not held meet...	Wolfie55	7	2472	Jan 6, 2022 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change January 5 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's C2C, the author shares about the meaning of "compassion." When the author first arrived at Al-Anon, they thought compassion meant making excuses or covering for the alcoholic. Through Al-Anon, the author learned that making excuses and covering for others is "enabling" -...	Skorpi	4	521	Jan 6, 2022 by DM2021
	Boundaries- manipulation? (Preview) Hello, new to Alanon and this forum. Boundaries are something I am still learning and working on. I have a question though, if I set a boundary, say "I will stay at my parent's house if I feel unsafe" or "I will ask you to leave the relationship and house if you are not in active recovery, working steps an...	MaryFL	6	2829	Jan 5, 2022 by Daffodils
	C2C 1/4/22 The Journey of a Thousand Miles Begins with One Step... (Preview) Today's writer recalls feelings of loneliness and desperation at time of Alanon discovery, of wanting the serenity that members there seemed to enjoy.The opportunity was not lost as the newcomer absorbed what had worked for others: Attending/sharing at meetings, work the Steps (in order, one at...	Enigmatic	4	2355	Jan 4, 2022 by Daffodils
	C2C, Monday, 1/3: I can change the past if I stop repeating it in the present. (Preview) The writer of Mondays reading explores how to make positive changes: -ask, am I moving in a positive direction? -am I going to meetings and practicing the principles?-am I breaking out of unhealthy and unsatisfying patterns of the past? -can I set goals and take small risks on a daily basis? -can I ta...	Lyne	3	510	Jan 3, 2022 by Iamhere
	Happy New Year MIP Family!! (Preview) Sending my best wishes to the MIP Family for a very prosperous and enlightening 2022!!	DM2021	3	3280	Jan 2, 2022 by DM2021
	Funny, but not really (Preview) Whats funny, but perhaps its more ironic, is that I can go for months in a mental state of letting go, live and let live, think, how important is it, etc. etc. etc. Since Christmas Eve, when my As drinking was apparent and in my face, I have not been able to let it go. So the question Im asking myself, after...	Lyne	2	2546	Jan 2, 2022 by DM2021
	Hope for Today Jan 2 (Preview) Good morning everyone: And Happy New Year! Todays reading is about the power of the serenity prayer. The writer describes this as the first tool used in recovery. Not being able to alter the past, having the power to change our attitudes and resentments and having hope about the potential for our ow...	yanksfan51	2	2640	Jan 2, 2022 by DM2021
	Back to the drawing board for me. (Preview) Funny how things come together. I posted a little while back about how I am writing a book about living through domestic violence and how I wasn't sure if I could or couldn't mention that al-anon was a HUGE part of my way out. That prompted some discussions and thinking about privacy and anonymity that I...	Youknowme	12	2452	Jan 1, 2022 by Iamhere
	December 31 - Hope for Today - Consistency (Preview) The December 31 reading in Hope for Today reflects on the consistently repeated phrases heard in the Suggested Welcome and Closing at Al-Anon meetings.No situation is really hopeless, and we can find contentment and even happiness whether the alcoholic is still drinking or notWe can put our prob...	Freetime	6	2219	Jan 1, 2022 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change December 29 (Preview) Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shares that there are times when everything the alcoholic in their life does irritates them. It seems that the alcoholic even pours the breakfast cereal wrong! The author uses this as an opportunity to reflect on what is going on internally. Is there a revie...	Skorpi	7	1128	Dec 31, 2021 by DM2021
	C2C, Monday 12/27: Differing opinions? Carry your QTIP! (Preview) The writer ponders the issue of facing different opinions, and what to do at that point: take a stance that one is right and one is wrong, defend oneself, take the disagreement personally, or be grateful that there are numerous ways of looking at life. The writer goes on to say if we can practice grati...	Lyne	4	1328	Dec 28, 2021 by Iamhere
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