Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

De Anna · De Anna

I need a little help on boundaries. Could someone further explain this? Or tell me if the following would apply. I am not sure of this. I don't have too many things to set boundaries for because he brings home the $; stays home; helps out; is respectful; isn't abusive.&nbs...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

"Babe Ruth hit more home runs than anyone, but he also struck out more often than anyone." Anonymous

melanieL · melanieL

Horray!!! I finally set a boundary. Sunday i invited my ex-A to dinner, he said he could only come if i looked after his dog for the afternoon while he attended a AA meeting . I knew he was manipulating me , but hey i let it ride. He said he would be back at about 6.30pm so i cooked dinner for then, at about 6.40p...

debilyn · debilyn

NOT you are weird. lol NOW the post is there! I tried to find the post you spoke of but could not find it. There was no private post. Can you email me now? I have been to a few meetings lately. I really love them. We are so fortunate to have this medium. John, bless his pea picken heart, sen...

khadejah · khadejah

hi all feeling extremely overwhelmed since my first post my hubby has been in treatment coming home soon continues to speak to this other woman he has been having an affair with for the last two months . I have so much confusion ny hubby has been struggling with his recovery for awhile now and i have rem...

Busbe · Busbe

Can anyone relate to this my husband and I were having lunch today at this real mexican resturant real mexican people running it it was nothing fancy just good food when all of a sudden this fear emotion came over me and I could not figure out why I was having that emotion and it has came over m...

lin0606 · lin0606

I'm interested in hearing from any of you with some time in the program about dealing with the alcoholic in the life of someone you know. I was recently contacted by the A husband of a friend of mine who is not in the program, but who has been doing some program reading, and thinking seriously about her mar...

abbyal · abbyal

I am just posting this today maybe it will make it real for me. I am focused on the line from our literature that says "What would I be doing right now , if this weren't happening. It has gotten me thru many bad days in the past. Last nite I lost a dear friend, we had just gone to a play in a comunity a f...

Amelda13 · Amelda13

Hi, I'am from the North East and was wondering if anyone had information on Rehabs that will keep someone for more than a day or two. We have a son with Bi-Polar and who is an drug addict but we cannot seem to find anywhere he can go for more than a couple of days. Any information would be greatly appre...

Gault · Gault

Where I live in UK most Alanon members are female. Finding a male sponsor for myself, also male, is proving difficult. Someone told me to try the message board and here I am. I shall welcome all views. I've been in fellowship 5/6 years. Thanks

mastiff · mastiff

Hi all, I am writing to tell all of you that there is a conference here in Yosemite, CA in November. I don't have very much info yet, but am working on getting all the info for those of you that might be intersted in attending!!! What better place to meet f2f then at a conference right?&...

pepodwyer · pepodwyer

 I

AlaMom · AlaMom

Hiya everyone, Just wanted to share my good news today. I mentioned yesteday in the room that I have been working very hard on paying off some big bills and getting out of debt. Well it payed off for me today. As a result of some very hard work, imposing on my mother's hospitality, a...

cdb · cdb

Hello friends, This is not about the alcoholic in my life. This is about me. I had a phone call today from the aunt I am not very happy with. That aunt/uncle are the ones that sold the business out from underneath my son recently and my dad too. She first asked if I was still talking to her and the adult that...

cdb · cdb

Hello whitie, Your reply to suntansuzie's post brought tears to my eyes. I felt so bad for that man and his darned insurance. grrrrr I also want to thank you for working in the area you do. I am sure you are a great asset to those poeple. I can tell from your post. :) My dad currently is suffer...

kerry5 · kerry5

Hi,I posted this on a reply on this site and on the family teens site and i thought i would post it for all to read. Theres alot more that has happened to me but this is it in a nutshell lol. I am 32 years old and both my parents were violent alcoholics. I started to realize thier drinking at 8...

gardengal · gardengal

Tomrrow is my pre trial, once again my life has been turned upside down, and my guts inside out. 31 years married and my husband becoming an A and walking out to what I call his "drinking career". This is alcoholism at its finest. I would have never thought in a million years that my life would be as i...

cdb · cdb

Hello debilyn, My email would not send you anything last night so I sent it through the messages here at this message board. You can check it by looking up above where it says Logged in,,debilyn. Then you click after new messages. If you cannot see that you can click on your name and it should show your m...

search41 · search41

abby, thank you for your reply. when you said 'understanding him still isn't the answer', and, 'just know it is the disease' and 'you are never going to understand him', you know what popped into my head? a comment i will never forget that was one of my biggest revelations of 'fai...

jfoy · jfoy

Hello I am new here. My husband has been going to AA since Oct 8. He had been sober since then. Last night March 29 he bought a 24 ounce beer and said he wanted to prove to himself he could stop at one. He did. He said if he could he was not an alcoholic. My concern is he is and he put me thru h*ll before Oct 8th. He wo...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

"Worry and fear can alter our perceptions until we lose all sense of reality, twisting neutral situations into nightmares. Because most worry focuses on the future, if we can learn to stay in the present, ....we take postive steps toward warding off the effects of fear. ....

worriedmom · worriedmom

hello, i know others have written about detaching and really dont even know what i need to do at this point, so here goes, my daughter has been clean from meth for 6 1/2 mths now- she has been doing fantastic etc. she was living in sober/ recovery for 6 mths and i never worried about her know she has to...

ann · ann

It's to late for my family. It might not be for your's. It's been almost a month now. We still can't believe it happened. We didn't expect it. Although It was a shock, it didn't suprise us how it happened, it suprised us that it did happen. He's gone! We will never see him again on earth. Why? W...

jj · jj

I have been missing Mark.S too!! I enjoy his replys. Come back soon!! Keep smiling

melanieL · melanieL

My ex-husband who I am still very much involved has been going to AA for the past year. I he has been dry a few times has relapses and now been dry for about a week. At the moment he talks utterly crazy things, things that are unbelievable and done really make much sense. Has anyone else experience this or it...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

"Do not dare to live without some clear intention toward which your living shall be bent. Mean to be something with all your might." -- Phillip Brooks [ I really like this one, but I have to remember Easy.....Does It ! ]

suntansuzie · suntansuzie

READ THIS. LET IT REALLY SINK IN. THEN CHOOSE. John is the kind of guy you love to hate. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say. When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would reply, "If I were any better, I would be twins!" He was a natural motivator. If an e...

jj · jj

So most of you know that I have been working on my step 4. Well I got over being mad and delt with all that angered me and began again on the step. I never thought that I could actually see so much great things in myself. I have never had a problem seeing the couragous and strong people around me and have alwa...

cdb · cdb

Hello friends, For me letting go and letting god is a process. I would like to set the record straight on some things that have been typed out in the room to me while others are there that have been hurtful and inaccurate. This is for my recovery. You need not reply or even read this. What I a...

AlbertaCowboy · AlbertaCowboy

Thanks for all the kind wishes and support everyone has extended to me. As for my situation, things are still pretty unclear. My wife got home from rehab on Friday. She did not inform me when she would be back, she just appeared. This was a bit stressful as I had my children for the w...

Jeannie · Jeannie

Hi, I was helping my daughter study and we got to talking. She takes advanced Psycology in school and she had questioned me. I don't know the answer. I told her it was something to either question her teacher about or ask her councilor about. She was reading about Passive aggressive personality di...

Pebbles · Pebbles

Hi everyone. I'm new to this so I have a question. I have been to 5 f2f meetings and I just heard at the last one that we are supposed to work the 12 steps. To show you how new to this I am, I didn't know you "worked" the steps, I just thought you read them daily, or as the need arose. Ho...

melanieL · melanieL

my husband left me three years ago for another women who he has recently broken up with. He is an alcoholic and made my life hell for 12 years after which he left. Despite this I do and have always loved him deeply. He is now attending AA and is trying his best to be sober, but it is so so so hard for him. I st...

richard · richard

My ex-wife had this philosophy: Although she should not have to suffer the indignity of working for a living and thus not have much money, she still should be able to drive a Cadillac car. Scheming was her way of making that come true… always, 24 – 7 scheming. So, my son goes to an accountant and files for b...

bob6502 · bob6502

"We aren't perfect....After a while, you'll discover that though you may not like all of us, you'll love us in a very special way - the same way we already love you. Talk to each other, reason things out with someone else, but let there be no gossip or criticism of one another. Instead, let the understand...

search41 · search41

abby, in a very recent post you said, "A lot of a's dont feel they deserve to be loved so push away the people they love the most". i know this is true, but, could you elaborate on that thought? i am too close to the situation, and am the one being pushed away. i am sure i know the answer somew...

richard · richard

I am sorry that I have not been posting much lately. I have been going out to my favorite and beautiful State park and riding my trail bike and walking for exercise. With my physical medical condition, I do not have much time to spare for much activity. If I do one thing then I have to give up doing other thin...

Lanchas · Lanchas

Last night I decided I should control certain aspects of my life thinking it would make my life easier. For example, how my room looks, which is usually messy, and now I have decided to try and control how clean it is. The next thing I was going to control was my school life, meaning how well I did in s...

jj · jj

To let go doesn’t mean to stop caring; it means I can’t do it for someone else. To let go is not to cut myself off; it is the realization that I can’t control another. To let go is not to enable, but to allow learning from natural consequences. To let go is to admit powerles...

cdb · cdb

Hello, I am just wondering how you are doing. Did your situation with your wife resolve itself? I hope things are going well for you. I have been thinking of you. your friend in recovery, cdb :)

Joat · Joat

"Let go, let God" is often said in Al-Anon. I'm not religious, and don't believe in anything even remotely like God, but I realized something about that saying that lets me get past the G word. The idea behind "Let go, let God" is that the more I try to control situations myself, and the more I try to ta...

Jeannie · Jeannie

Morning everyone, It is amazing how the weather can change the way we feel. It is another pretty day here in NJ. Its about time after so many weeks of rain or snow and gloom! It felt so good to open the windows and only wear a sweatshirt to work this morning. If it warms up even more, I will keep the babi...

cdb · cdb

Is there a general meeting again this Wednesday? And will the discussion and VOTE come up over if we can continue to give hugs, smiles, agrees, etc. during meetings? I got the impression that issue was tabled at the last meeting meaning left for the next meeting to be resolv...

katie · katie

Hi everyone, I am new to posting, but have been reading the forum for some time. My husband and I have been married for nearly 24 years. I have just recently asked him for a divorce and feel terribly guilty over the entire situation. I have concluded I no longer love him and do n...

Jeannie · Jeannie

Hi, One of the things I enjoy at my job is the old timers I work with. Some of our drivers are older retired men from everything from the military to Wall Street. They all now drive a school bus as a way of making extra cash and keeping themselves busy. They also love to talk and tell stories, and I usually e...

megan · megan

Is there any readings you can recommend on this subject? this is exactly what is going on in my marriage. It is even more powerfully important than the booze I think to my husband My husband has again quit drinking and I really think it is because I started spending nights at the local h...

Jeannie · Jeannie

Hi, Not feeling very proud of myself tonight. Boy did I take 100 steps backwards! I went to have the talk with my husband, it started out well enough, and then spiraled out of control. I had myself very calm, knew just what to say, and he was sober and at the begining friendly enough, then he just tur...

chris · chris

Hi i met a man three weeks ago that is 5 months sober. He goes to aa meetings.We are just starting to "date",build a friendship. Is there anything i can do to encourage or help him in his recovery??My moms been in the program 27 years (aa).dads still a drinking alcoholic so i'm not new to any of this. Just...

jj · jj

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, the courage to change the things I can and the knowledge to know the difference. It is my Ah's Birthday and he just got home right lit up, just another day in the life of Stacey!!! Any excuse to go out and it could be absolutly nothing!!! We...

gardengal · gardengal

What we dont do is spend alot of time talkign about the alcholic. Instead, we learn to put the focus on ourselves. At first this approach may not seem to make much sense. After all,,it is often easier to recognize the A's problems than our own. Most of us feel certain that if only he or she would stop drinki...

dori · dori

    &nbs...

cdb · cdb

Hello again,,, I really just want to know if there is a general meeting this Wednesday (which I assume there is) , what time it is and what the agenda is. Will there still be a discussion or vote on etiquette at meetings? That is all I want to know. TY cdb

Jeannie · Jeannie

Hi, I have a curiouse streak in me so I had to do a little research today. I am a little aprehensive about this marriage counciling my husband wants me to go to. First of all, he says he is going to pick the councilor, because he says he doesn't want me turning one against him before we start. He says he wa...

shimo · shimo

wallsal55 · wallsal55

There is a post on the AA message board under "Positively Negative" as to why the alcoholic drinks. Also, while you're there--there's another excellent post "Anger". Just recently attendend an Open AA speaker meeting. The speaker said alcohol was a rocket for him, a feel rea...

jessi · jessi

Hi all, I recently had a very spiritual experience and lesson with going through my feelings with a friend instead of around and want to share it here. I have a very dear friend in program with whom I spend a lot of time with. We just "get" each other and have great talks, laughs, etc. Anyhow, last...

Annie · Annie

Sorry, I haven't posted for awhile. I have to key this quickly as my laptop has been shutting down on me unpredictably. My A was in the hospital with his emphysema in December; then again in January; and again in February. He isn't doing very well w the emphysema--on oxygen--and ca...

New Member in Need of Encouragement · Mad4stevie

Hello to everyone here - I am glad to have finally been able to tap into the support and encouragement offered by Al-Anon via a message board. I don't have an Al-Anon group that is close to my home, so I am looking in this area for some guidance, support and encouragement. I am familiar with the 12 step...

jj · jj

So I had my dental surgery and made it through it fine. I am very sore as it was pretty invasive and I must say my husband has been home everynight keeping an eye on me. Tonight after work he went out which I had expected and I am fine with, however he brought home a friend and they are currently passed out on my...

fiona123 · fiona123

YOU DID IT ! I'm so proud of you ! You DID it ...I am so glad this part is done and only sorry to see you must endure one more ordeal This happened to me to ...007 spewed lie after lie ...I was feeling so scared and desperate ...I needed the support to survive ... I was so...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	please clarify boundaries.... (Preview) I need a little help on boundaries. Could someone further explain this? Or tell me if the following would apply. I am not sure of this. I don't have too many things to set boundaries for because he brings home the $; stays home; helps out; is respectful; isn't abusive.&nbs...	De Anna	7	1114	Apr 12, 2005 by wallsal55
	Quote for Today (Preview) "Babe Ruth hit more home runs than anyone, but he also struck out more often than anyone." Anonymous	wallsal55	3	713	Apr 11, 2005 by De Anna
	i'V STARTED SETTING BOUNDARIES (Preview) Horray!!! I finally set a boundary. Sunday i invited my ex-A to dinner, he said he could only come if i looked after his dog for the afternoon while he attended a AA meeting . I knew he was manipulating me , but hey i let it ride. He said he would be back at about 6.30pm so i cooked dinner for then, at about 6.40p...	melanieL	4	1125	Apr 11, 2005 by jj
	cdb/ weird (Preview) NOT you are weird. lol NOW the post is there! I tried to find the post you spoke of but could not find it. There was no private post. Can you email me now? I have been to a few meetings lately. I really love them. We are so fortunate to have this medium. John, bless his pea picken heart, sen...	debilyn	1	942	Apr 11, 2005 by cdb
	feeling overwhelmed (Preview) hi all feeling extremely overwhelmed since my first post my hubby has been in treatment coming home soon continues to speak to this other woman he has been having an affair with for the last two months . I have so much confusion ny hubby has been struggling with his recovery for awhile now and i have rem...	khadejah	5	1200	Apr 11, 2005 by bob6502
	Fears (Preview) Can anyone relate to this my husband and I were having lunch today at this real mexican resturant real mexican people running it it was nothing fancy just good food when all of a sudden this fear emotion came over me and I could not figure out why I was having that emotion and it has came over m...	Busbe	5	1006	Apr 11, 2005 by Busbe
	Someone Else's A (Preview) I'm interested in hearing from any of you with some time in the program about dealing with the alcoholic in the life of someone you know. I was recently contacted by the A husband of a friend of mine who is not in the program, but who has been doing some program reading, and thinking seriously about her mar...	lin0606	6	1273	Apr 11, 2005 by lin0606
	Gods gift to us is life (Preview) I am just posting this today maybe it will make it real for me. I am focused on the line from our literature that says "What would I be doing right now , if this weren't happening. It has gotten me thru many bad days in the past. Last nite I lost a dear friend, we had just gone to a play in a comunity a f...	abbyal	13	1298	Apr 10, 2005 by De Anna
	Rehab (Preview) Hi, I'am from the North East and was wondering if anyone had information on Rehabs that will keep someone for more than a day or two. We have a son with Bi-Polar and who is an drug addict but we cannot seem to find anywhere he can go for more than a couple of days. Any information would be greatly appre...	Amelda13	8	1109	Apr 10, 2005 by Jeannie
	Sponsor by web (Preview) Where I live in UK most Alanon members are female. Finding a male sponsor for myself, also male, is proving difficult. Someone told me to try the message board and here I am. I shall welcome all views. I've been in fellowship 5/6 years. Thanks	Gault	4	944	Apr 10, 2005 by lildee
	Yosemite Conference (Preview) Hi all, I am writing to tell all of you that there is a conference here in Yosemite, CA in November. I don't have very much info yet, but am working on getting all the info for those of you that might be intersted in attending!!! What better place to meet f2f then at a conference right?&...	mastiff	1	1046	Apr 10, 2005 by david62
	Need help (Preview)  I	pepodwyer	4	988	Apr 10, 2005 by pepodwyer
	HP Working Overdrive (Preview) Hiya everyone, Just wanted to share my good news today. I mentioned yesteday in the room that I have been working very hard on paying off some big bills and getting out of debt. Well it payed off for me today. As a result of some very hard work, imposing on my mother's hospitality, a...	AlaMom	7	1148	Apr 10, 2005 by Diva
	Making a difficult phone call... (Preview) Hello friends, This is not about the alcoholic in my life. This is about me. I had a phone call today from the aunt I am not very happy with. That aunt/uncle are the ones that sold the business out from underneath my son recently and my dad too. She first asked if I was still talking to her and the adult that...	cdb	7	1172	Apr 10, 2005 by DanaAngel
	Hey whitie,,, (Preview) Hello whitie, Your reply to suntansuzie's post brought tears to my eyes. I felt so bad for that man and his darned insurance. grrrrr I also want to thank you for working in the area you do. I am sure you are a great asset to those poeple. I can tell from your post. :) My dad currently is suffer...	cdb	1	893	Apr 9, 2005 by whitie
	My Story (Preview) Hi,I posted this on a reply on this site and on the family teens site and i thought i would post it for all to read. Theres alot more that has happened to me but this is it in a nutshell lol. I am 32 years old and both my parents were violent alcoholics. I started to realize thier drinking at 8...	kerry5	3	876	Apr 9, 2005 by cloud
	Encouragement/prayers needed (Preview) Tomrrow is my pre trial, once again my life has been turned upside down, and my guts inside out. 31 years married and my husband becoming an A and walking out to what I call his "drinking career". This is alcoholism at its finest. I would have never thought in a million years that my life would be as i...	gardengal	19	1313	Apr 9, 2005 by cloud
	Debilyn (Preview) Hello debilyn, My email would not send you anything last night so I sent it through the messages here at this message board. You can check it by looking up above where it says Logged in,,debilyn. Then you click after new messages. If you cannot see that you can click on your name and it should show your m...	cdb	0	921	Apr 9, 2005 by cdb
	thanks abby! (Preview) abby, thank you for your reply. when you said 'understanding him still isn't the answer', and, 'just know it is the disease' and 'you are never going to understand him', you know what popped into my head? a comment i will never forget that was one of my biggest revelations of 'fai...	search41	2	969	Apr 9, 2005 by cdb
	Recovering Alcoholic (Preview) Hello I am new here. My husband has been going to AA since Oct 8. He had been sober since then. Last night March 29 he bought a 24 ounce beer and said he wanted to prove to himself he could stop at one. He did. He said if he could he was not an alcoholic. My concern is he is and he put me thru h*ll before Oct 8th. He wo...	jfoy	11	1440	Apr 8, 2005 by Jeannie
	Fear (Preview) "Worry and fear can alter our perceptions until we lose all sense of reality, twisting neutral situations into nightmares. Because most worry focuses on the future, if we can learn to stay in the present, ....we take postive steps toward warding off the effects of fear. ....	wallsal55	2	849	Apr 8, 2005 by Jeannie
	detaching with love? (Preview) hello, i know others have written about detaching and really dont even know what i need to do at this point, so here goes, my daughter has been clean from meth for 6 1/2 mths now- she has been doing fantastic etc. she was living in sober/ recovery for 6 mths and i never worried about her know she has to...	worriedmom	6	1156	Apr 8, 2005 by Jeannie
	Its to late (Preview) It's to late for my family. It might not be for your's. It's been almost a month now. We still can't believe it happened. We didn't expect it. Although It was a shock, it didn't suprise us how it happened, it suprised us that it did happen. He's gone! We will never see him again on earth. Why? W...	ann	8	1360	Apr 8, 2005 by Mark S
	Mark. S (Preview) I have been missing Mark.S too!! I enjoy his replys. Come back soon!! Keep smiling	jj	2	936	Apr 8, 2005 by jj
	THE CRAZINESS IN EARLY SOBRIETY (Preview) My ex-husband who I am still very much involved has been going to AA for the past year. I he has been dry a few times has relapses and now been dry for about a week. At the moment he talks utterly crazy things, things that are unbelievable and done really make much sense. Has anyone else experience this or it...	melanieL	8	1479	Apr 8, 2005 by wallsal55
	Quote for Today (Preview) "Do not dare to live without some clear intention toward which your living shall be bent. Mean to be something with all your might." -- Phillip Brooks [ I really like this one, but I have to remember Easy.....Does It ! ]	wallsal55	0	841	Apr 8, 2005 by wallsal55
	Choices (Preview) READ THIS. LET IT REALLY SINK IN. THEN CHOOSE. John is the kind of guy you love to hate. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say. When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would reply, "If I were any better, I would be twins!" He was a natural motivator. If an e...	suntansuzie	7	1151	Apr 8, 2005 by mastiff
	Found out more than I thought I could (Preview) So most of you know that I have been working on my step 4. Well I got over being mad and delt with all that angered me and began again on the step. I never thought that I could actually see so much great things in myself. I have never had a problem seeing the couragous and strong people around me and have alwa...	jj	3	993	Apr 8, 2005 by jj
	Gossip: Setting the record straight (Preview) Hello friends, For me letting go and letting god is a process. I would like to set the record straight on some things that have been typed out in the room to me while others are there that have been hurtful and inaccurate. This is for my recovery. You need not reply or even read this. What I a...	cdb	9	1222	Apr 8, 2005 by jj
	an update (Preview) Thanks for all the kind wishes and support everyone has extended to me. As for my situation, things are still pretty unclear. My wife got home from rehab on Friday. She did not inform me when she would be back, she just appeared. This was a bit stressful as I had my children for the w...	AlbertaCowboy	8	934	Apr 7, 2005 by AlbertaCowboy
	PAPD? (Preview) Hi, I was helping my daughter study and we got to talking. She takes advanced Psycology in school and she had questioned me. I don't know the answer. I told her it was something to either question her teacher about or ask her councilor about. She was reading about Passive aggressive personality di...	Jeannie	10	1324	Apr 7, 2005 by Jeannie
	12 Steps (Preview) Hi everyone. I'm new to this so I have a question. I have been to 5 f2f meetings and I just heard at the last one that we are supposed to work the 12 steps. To show you how new to this I am, I didn't know you "worked" the steps, I just thought you read them daily, or as the need arose. Ho...	Pebbles	8	1354	Apr 7, 2005 by Pebbles
	Help with my ex (Preview) my husband left me three years ago for another women who he has recently broken up with. He is an alcoholic and made my life hell for 12 years after which he left. Despite this I do and have always loved him deeply. He is now attending AA and is trying his best to be sober, but it is so so so hard for him. I st...	melanieL	6	1172	Apr 7, 2005 by cdb
	Traits of son's mom in son... (Preview) My ex-wife had this philosophy: Although she should not have to suffer the indignity of working for a living and thus not have much money, she still should be able to drive a Cadillac car. Scheming was her way of making that come true… always, 24 – 7 scheming. So, my son goes to an accountant and files for b...	richard	1	886	Apr 7, 2005 by cdb
	Gossip (Preview) "We aren't perfect....After a while, you'll discover that though you may not like all of us, you'll love us in a very special way - the same way we already love you. Talk to each other, reason things out with someone else, but let there be no gossip or criticism of one another. Instead, let the understand...	bob6502	4	975	Apr 7, 2005 by buzzfree
	abbyal-a question... (Preview) abby, in a very recent post you said, "A lot of a's dont feel they deserve to be loved so push away the people they love the most". i know this is true, but, could you elaborate on that thought? i am too close to the situation, and am the one being pushed away. i am sure i know the answer somew...	search41	10	2074	Apr 6, 2005 by search41
	My son... (Preview) I am sorry that I have not been posting much lately. I have been going out to my favorite and beautiful State park and riding my trail bike and walking for exercise. With my physical medical condition, I do not have much time to spare for much activity. If I do one thing then I have to give up doing other thin...	richard	5	869	Apr 6, 2005 by richard
	Acting Controlling (Preview) Last night I decided I should control certain aspects of my life thinking it would make my life easier. For example, how my room looks, which is usually messy, and now I have decided to try and control how clean it is. The next thing I was going to control was my school life, meaning how well I did in s...	Lanchas	9	1306	Apr 6, 2005 by Maria123
	Letting go, good but long (Preview) To let go doesn’t mean to stop caring; it means I can’t do it for someone else. To let go is not to cut myself off; it is the realization that I can’t control another. To let go is not to enable, but to allow learning from natural consequences. To let go is to admit powerles...	jj	3	1508	Apr 6, 2005 by Pebbles
	Alberta Cowboy (Preview) Hello, I am just wondering how you are doing. Did your situation with your wife resolve itself? I hope things are going well for you. I have been thinking of you. your friend in recovery, cdb :)	cdb	4	928	Apr 6, 2005 by AlbertaCowboy
	Letting Go Without God (Preview) "Let go, let God" is often said in Al-Anon. I'm not religious, and don't believe in anything even remotely like God, but I realized something about that saying that lets me get past the G word. The idea behind "Let go, let God" is that the more I try to control situations myself, and the more I try to ta...	Joat	7	2183	Apr 6, 2005 by Lanchas
	Welcome back sun! (Preview) Morning everyone, It is amazing how the weather can change the way we feel. It is another pretty day here in NJ. Its about time after so many weeks of rain or snow and gloom! It felt so good to open the windows and only wear a sweatshirt to work this morning. If it warms up even more, I will keep the babi...	Jeannie	1	924	Apr 6, 2005 by megan
	Meeting on VOTE for hugs, etc.?? (Preview) Is there a general meeting again this Wednesday? And will the discussion and VOTE come up over if we can continue to give hugs, smiles, agrees, etc. during meetings? I got the impression that issue was tabled at the last meeting meaning left for the next meeting to be resolv...	cdb	17	1358	Apr 6, 2005 by DanaAngel
	Newbie with a long vent (Preview) Hi everyone, I am new to posting, but have been reading the forum for some time. My husband and I have been married for nearly 24 years. I have just recently asked him for a divorce and feel terribly guilty over the entire situation. I have concluded I no longer love him and do n...	katie	6	1112	Apr 6, 2005 by jj
	Talk with a recovering A (very long) (Preview) Hi, One of the things I enjoy at my job is the old timers I work with. Some of our drivers are older retired men from everything from the military to Wall Street. They all now drive a school bus as a way of making extra cash and keeping themselves busy. They also love to talk and tell stories, and I usually e...	Jeannie	3	1225	Apr 5, 2005 by bcanuck
	Power and Control in relationships (Preview) Is there any readings you can recommend on this subject? this is exactly what is going on in my marriage. It is even more powerfully important than the booze I think to my husband My husband has again quit drinking and I really think it is because I started spending nights at the local h...	megan	3	1147	Apr 5, 2005 by cdb
	Talk with my husband (Preview) Hi, Not feeling very proud of myself tonight. Boy did I take 100 steps backwards! I went to have the talk with my husband, it started out well enough, and then spiraled out of control. I had myself very calm, knew just what to say, and he was sober and at the begining friendly enough, then he just tur...	Jeannie	13	1903	Apr 5, 2005 by Merlynn
	new friend is newly sober...... (Preview) Hi i met a man three weeks ago that is 5 months sober. He goes to aa meetings.We are just starting to "date",build a friendship. Is there anything i can do to encourage or help him in his recovery??My moms been in the program 27 years (aa).dads still a drinking alcoholic so i'm not new to any of this. Just...	chris	4	1136	Apr 5, 2005 by abbyal
	Pushing buttons (Preview) God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, the courage to change the things I can and the knowledge to know the difference. It is my Ah's Birthday and he just got home right lit up, just another day in the life of Stacey!!! Any excuse to go out and it could be absolutly nothing!!! We...	jj	11	1902	Apr 5, 2005 by Jeannie
	CHANGING OUR FOCUS (Preview) What we dont do is spend alot of time talkign about the alcholic. Instead, we learn to put the focus on ourselves. At first this approach may not seem to make much sense. After all,,it is often easier to recognize the A's problems than our own. Most of us feel certain that if only he or she would stop drinki...	gardengal	4	1053	Apr 5, 2005 by megan
	a tribute (Preview)     &nbs...	dori	6	951	Apr 5, 2005 by TLC2
	What is the agenda for wednesday's meeting? (Preview) Hello again,,, I really just want to know if there is a general meeting this Wednesday (which I assume there is) , what time it is and what the agenda is. Will there still be a discussion or vote on etiquette at meetings? That is all I want to know. TY cdb	cdb	2	882	Apr 5, 2005 by cdb
	Counceling (Preview) Hi, I have a curiouse streak in me so I had to do a little research today. I am a little aprehensive about this marriage counciling my husband wants me to go to. First of all, he says he is going to pick the councilor, because he says he doesn't want me turning one against him before we start. He says he wa...	Jeannie	5	1257	Apr 5, 2005 by De Anna
	BUS MTG AGENDA - APRIL 6/05 (Preview)	shimo	0	968	Apr 5, 2005 by shimo
	Why They Drink? (Preview) There is a post on the AA message board under "Positively Negative" as to why the alcoholic drinks. Also, while you're there--there's another excellent post "Anger". Just recently attendend an Open AA speaker meeting. The speaker said alcohol was a rocket for him, a feel rea...	wallsal55	4	1217	Apr 4, 2005 by sanddie
	going through, not around (Preview) Hi all, I recently had a very spiritual experience and lesson with going through my feelings with a friend instead of around and want to share it here. I have a very dear friend in program with whom I spend a lot of time with. We just "get" each other and have great talks, laughs, etc. Anyhow, last...	jessi	5	1020	Apr 4, 2005 by jj
	me again (Preview) Sorry, I haven't posted for awhile. I have to key this quickly as my laptop has been shutting down on me unpredictably. My A was in the hospital with his emphysema in December; then again in January; and again in February. He isn't doing very well w the emphysema--on oxygen--and ca...	Annie	5	1115	Apr 4, 2005 by megan
	New Member in Need of Encouragement (Preview) Hello to everyone here - I am glad to have finally been able to tap into the support and encouragement offered by Al-Anon via a message board. I don't have an Al-Anon group that is close to my home, so I am looking in this area for some guidance, support and encouragement. I am familiar with the 12 step...	Mad4stevie	10	1135	Apr 4, 2005 by megan
	confused (Preview) So I had my dental surgery and made it through it fine. I am very sore as it was pretty invasive and I must say my husband has been home everynight keeping an eye on me. Tonight after work he went out which I had expected and I am fine with, however he brought home a friend and they are currently passed out on my...	jj	11	1261	Apr 4, 2005 by megan
	HUGS for Garden Gal ! (Preview) YOU DID IT ! I'm so proud of you ! You DID it ...I am so glad this part is done and only sorry to see you must endure one more ordeal This happened to me to ...007 spewed lie after lie ...I was feeling so scared and desperate ...I needed the support to survive ... I was so...	fiona123	3	821	Apr 4, 2005 by gardengal
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.