The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Horray!!! I finally set a boundary. Sunday i invited my ex-A to dinner, he said he could only come if i looked after his dog for the afternoon while he attended a AA meeting . I knew he was manipulating me , but hey i let it ride. He said he would be back at about 6.30pm so i cooked dinner for then, at about 6.40pm he rang and his opening line was "I hope you all have not been waiting for me to have dinner" , Well yes we darn well had. He said he was in a rush and could he have his dinner to take away.
I was quite cross at this point because the sunday before he had done the same thing, only that time he had been invited to dinner with someone else from AA and wanted to take his dinner from me home for the following day.
Anyway I tried very hard not to get angry, I just thought well this is my HP teaching me an important lesson. A's cant be depended on, and not to invite him again. So when he arrived, he knew i was cross but I just said, very calmly that I was annoyed , but I had learned a lesson, his behaviour was not acceptable to me , as he had done this twice , and I would not ask him again on a sunday. I was very firm but fair.
Not sure this is the correct way to do it , but at least its a start.
Going to two Alanon meetings this week as i havent been able to go for a few weeks.
