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Detach, Detach, Detach
(Preview)
I get that the difference between detaching with love and just plain old not caring...and I think about it like the difference between a demand and a request. I been checking myself to be sure my boundaries are more "no thank you" than kiss off . But here is my question....I have learned to res...
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fineline
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5
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1071
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D.E.T.A.C.H.
(Preview)
D on't E ven T hink A bout C hanging Him [or Her] !
I have to keep remembering this one ! ROFL!
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wallsal55
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4
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851
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The Seven Wonders of The World
(Preview)
Thinking:  
1. To See
2. To Hear
3. To Touch
4. To Taste
5. &...
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wallsal55
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1
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630
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Harder than I thought
(Preview)
Well, we got through the first weekend back together as a family. It has been alot harder than I expected I must say. I am so happy that my husband is home and I realize that he has to continue to work his program and think about himself. I am just wondering when the hell an...
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hockeydal
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5
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774
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Workshop Ideas/kits/samples
(Preview)
I have been to some terrific workshops...now our group is planning a one day. They want to have a panel...but I remember some terrific work groups. Where do those ideas and supplies come from? Does world service have resources? Anything on the net? The things I am looking for divided people into group...
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fineline
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1
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5954
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picking wife up from hospital
(Preview)
Tonight I pick up my wife from the hospital where she has been ungoing psych treatment for bipolar and suicide attempts. She is to go back to alcohol treatment facility this weekend for more treatment. I believe it's a 2 or 3 week stint at the facility, back for a week, then back for another...
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AlbertaCowboy
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8
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944
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tooo new
(Preview)
I am very new to everything. I have been reading around on the postings, so I hope I have some idea of what's going on here. I have never been to a meeting or on the net for meetings so I'll need some guidance at times.
I have been with an a for 17 years and the insanity just keeps on rolli...
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victoria
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5
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827
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stress
(Preview)
Hi,
Even with my husband living with his parents, the stress is starting to get to me.
His parents no longer are rude and nasty to me, they say they finally realize that he has a problem, and they want to fix it.
Now they stop by to check on things, bring things for the house, Tpaper, paper towels etc....
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Jeannie
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5
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958
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Hi First Time User (I am broken)
(Preview)
Well I never thought I would ever be on one of "these sites" I am sad and angry.
A little background on me.
I am 26 year sold, I am married to a beautiful woman and we are expecting our first child, a little baby girl Abby.
My biological Father was mean and abused my Mother when I was young. I don'...
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ben
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7
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940
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Quotes for Today
(Preview)
What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us. --William Morrow
............Things to Think About
Other people can't make me feel responsible for their lives. I can turn off what I hear, look past what I se...
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wallsal55
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0
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662
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I'm looking for online sponser...
(Preview)
Hi,
I never had a sponser, so this is new to me. I'm not sure if this even can be done. I really don't want to leave email, since my family can read my email. I don't have long distance on the phone either. I however can type fairly quick for IM. Or I'm not sure of this priva...
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babs
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1
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747
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I need a sponsor
(Preview)
HI everybody.
I live in Alaska and have been in the program almost a year. I really need to get a sponsor. I go to meetings regularly but am having a challenge finding any guys who be interested in sponsoring; it was suggested I try online. I am really grateful for the al-anon program but need some help w...
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alaskamatt
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3
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859
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Set Myself Up for Disapointment
(Preview)
Yes I know better!!! I have no idea why I fell for it but I did. He drank today I guess me believing in him or his word was to much. He asked what was wrong when he woke me up from my nap to go get him and his friend some beer. I mostly avaided it and just told him that I am not going to enable his drinking. I did...
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jj
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5
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807
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thanks for the replies... any for this.
(Preview)
D hasn't really committed to stopping and we are separated now... I told him that I needed a week to myself to clear my head and get my balance back. I asked him not to call and when I was ready I would call him. He got mad and has been making threats to see other people and stuff like that. I...
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Orchid
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4
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835
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Hubby home from treatment
(Preview)
Hello friends,
It was suggested to me that I post here to get some feedback. My husband was just discharged from a 28 day treatment program called Homewood. He told me that he was getting out today (Thursday a.m.)but in fact got out on Wed. evening. It was suggested to me that this is comm...
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hockeydal
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5
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848
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omg he came home on a friday!!
(Preview)
So hubby stayed true to his word and came home.....I am truely happy that he kept his word.
YA
Thought I would let you all know
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jj
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4
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761
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Sponsorship Corner II
(Preview)
This is the place for those who want sponsors and those who want to be sponsored.
Those who wish to be sponsored, please post basic information about yourself and what you want in a sponsor here. Somebody will respond.
This goes for service sponsors and sponsees too!!
Haximon
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haximon
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4
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1012
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Should I let it go?
(Preview)
I was introduced to this site through a friend of mine who says it has helped her deal with her problems. So i decided to give it a shot. I am the daughter of a long time alcoholic. My dad married my mom with a drinking problem she did not comprehend until after their vows were said. When my moth...
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girlofgod13
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5
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921
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A little duality here (long)...
(Preview)
If I do not keep from using drugs like alcohol, etc. what good will I be to my recovering son or me or anyone? Thus, I beseech you to allow me to share with you what is a little more A.A. than Al-anon. Besides in the beginning the whole family got together in folks home to have their meetings, you know. Then of...
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richard
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4
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933
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bursting at seams
(Preview)
OH WOW my Ah came home tonight (drunk) and I am reading on of my books and he says "you reading about me?" I told him no... This is about me.. he was kind of like this is about me isn't it? So I told him no that it is about me and helps me learn about living with an alcoholic and about how I am taking back what this di...
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jj
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9
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975
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thinking alot
(Preview)
So I am working on step 4, putting the focus on me and taking a moral inventory of myself. Right now I am feeling angry. First of all I am not angry at my A I am angry at myself for letting me loose myself. I was so independant and strong willed before this. I was out going and in time I began to stay at home and do l...
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jj
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9
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1124
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Should I be concerned?
(Preview)
I posted this questions on another forum in this website and it was suggested I post the same here...
My wife drinks a bottle of wine a night (25 ounces). Sometimes she drinks a little more. She does this EVERY night. We have heated discussions regarding her consumption, but she continues to consume...
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WilliamH
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8
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993
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love vs. leaving
(Preview)
I am pretty frustrated - if I am working on myself and have no control over the alcoholic then why shouldn't the spouses just leave the alcoholic especially if they do not have children? If I just left than I could work on myself without having the alcoholic to distract me and also knowing that if h...
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estrelladehope
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13
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1297
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Guilt
(Preview)
....when past mistakes come to mind I tend to react with guilt, exaggerating the significance of my errors and thinking very badly of myself.
In Alanon, I'm learning to see myself more realistically. ....... ......But I'm not evil. It's time I stop treat...
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wallsal55
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1
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733
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First time on MB
(Preview)
just trying it out, have to go to work, will be back at a time when i can write my stuff,
Love to all--------------
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Karen KB
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4
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712
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Questions Often Asked About Al-Anon
(Preview)
1. What is alcoholism?
We often refer to it as a threefold family disease affecting the body, the mind and the spirit. For the drinker, one of the symptoms is an uncontrollable desire for alcohol.
2. How can I help an alcoholic?
Ultimately an alcoholic must want help, and often help is res...
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John
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5
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989
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Love Must Be Tough
(Preview)
I just read the posts on staying or leaving. I am on the other end of the leaving and it is tough. My recovering A has said he wants a divorce. He said this relationship takes to much time and he is not going to change. He has taken a job in another state and by summer says he is "outta of here" and he wants nothin...
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nmike
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4
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943
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Please explain how to look at postings
(Preview)
Hi everyone
I'm still fairly new here and still learning so much from all of you. You all are such wonderful special people and I'm so grateful for all of you
I am really trying hard to understand how the posting works. I've tried clicking on different things but I'm still confuse...
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Susanroo
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1
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708
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Suggestion for Mess. Board Users/Posters
(Preview)
I don't know if it's just me and my Middle Age brain-- I have adjusted to this message board as best I can, but am finding it hard to keep up with it. How do you feel? [I am making lifestyle changes--and now my computer is the library's! on M, W, F, and Sat.] Not sure how many...
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wallsal55
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5
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893
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Denial
(Preview)
As some of you know, my A wife has been in Detox twice, has had Mental Evals twice at the Police and Sheriff's stations all in the last month and a half. She's only been drinking habitually for six months and says it is only stress related. Last week after releasing herself early from a rehab...
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Beskem
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8
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908
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when is enough?
(Preview)
Hi all,
Big, huge, heavy dilemma here. Help!
I have had my ex-As cat for a year since we broke up. I agreed to this, knowing she would take him at the end of this month. However, she just got a new job and is commuting. She'll move June 1. And now she has asked me in an indirect way to keep the cat until s...
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jessi
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8
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1009
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bipolar alcoholic
(Preview)
hi, this is my first post so a little history about my situation might help.
I live commonlaw with a bipolar, alcoholic spouse. Each of us has 2 children from previous marriages, although none of them live fulltime with us. Due to her illnesses, we have suffered through 9 suicide attem...
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AlbertaCowboy
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7
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1130
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Hubby HOME from treatment
(Preview)
Hello friends
Well the experts were right. He stayed away for the one night and was with his fellow "a" friend. At his home in his home town. He is home and for now all is well. Thanks for all the prayers
-- Edited by hockeydal at 21:51, 2005-03-17
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hockeydal
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5
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733
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Unsure
(Preview)
I'm 18 and consider myself an adult but I odn't know if i should be in Al-Anon. It seems like its for older adults. Any advice anyone?
Lanchas
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Lanchas
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8
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946
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working towards peace.....
(Preview)
First, to all who have read my post on "I'm perfect, you're not".... Thanks for the replies. It was just how I felt. We all don't have the same thoughts, or feelings. I know what works for some, won't for others. That's what makes us unique. ...
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babs
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4
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921
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Quote for Today
(Preview)
"Excellence is an art won by training and habituaion. We do not act rightly because of virtue or excellence, but rather we have those because we have acted rightly. We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence is not an act, but a habit." --Aristotle
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wallsal55
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2
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805
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Trust, I used to give so freely
(Preview)
Had family program at the rehab center Monday and Tuesday. It was intense, and I initially left with some good feelings, better than the first time a couple years ago. My wife to my surprise did actually verbally accept responsibility for her actions and admitted her dishonesty as well as her assignm...
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Mark S
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12
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1079
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Read below post>>says cdb
(Preview)
Hello everyone,
I replied to the post below titled cdb about how my daughter is doing and about the family meeting we had. So for those that are interested, you need to go to that post for the update. TY your friend in recovery,,cdb :)
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cdb
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1
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695
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Think I just married ANOTHER alcoholic
(Preview)
Hi, after another bad weekend, I thought I would find a site where I could tell my story. I seem to be a magnet for alcoholics! I apologize for this long message ahead of time. Anyway, here it is: I was married for about nine years to a "weekend alcoholic" and the last few years were hell. My ex-husband woul...
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Lindy
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11
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907
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Forum 1987
(Preview)
1.)If you can give but one gift,make it the gift of good example
2.)Love is like gratitude,much better when show it.
3.)The door to a human heart can be opened only from the inside.
(((Group Hugs))))God Bless Angel
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angel123
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1
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622
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The Speaker Tapes
(Preview)
I listened to one of the speaker tapes offered on this site while I was doing my day to day chores.
ajit-s-alltexas200332.mp3
It was not only inspiring, but she is really, really funny and a great speaker.
Just thought I'd share in case ya'll haven't checked them out...
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Christy
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1
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891
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cdb...
(Preview)
Hey cdb I was just thinking about you and hopping that the family meeting went well. I haven't seen you on here and it made me think of you more.
Well I hope that all is well with everyone and you are in my prayers.
Love your friend in recovery JJ
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jj
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2
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595
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thanks TLC
(Preview)
In case you didn't read my reply to you. I really like the idea of using "My A" for my anonomous whoever, instead of My A meaning my alcoholic!!!!!! It means so much more to me. Thank you for that thought. Hope you have a nice day!
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babs
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2
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682
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Thanks to all!
(Preview)
Thank you all for your great responses to my post about helping my daughter. They were, once again, very insightful and helpful. I am so fortunate to get all of your experience to help me with this adventure. I am going to help with the car, but being a mother, I took the opportunity t...
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kathykelly
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1
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526
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Congratulations - To All
(Preview)
Applause, Applause for You, yes You, the posters of This Board
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wallsal55
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2
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673
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Love?
(Preview)
I guess this post is just for me to vent right now. Alot of the time I feel like my husband does not really love. How could he, he is an addict/alcoholic - he still drinks a few times a week and smokes pot - I can deal with this. What I have a hard time dealing with is the way he shows me he love...
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estrelladehope
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6
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928
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amazing chain of events
(Preview)
Today I was feeling unsure about the way face to face was going. As many of you know I go to meetings with my sister in law and I have been feeling that she was uncomfortable with the alanon meetings and knew she was leaning towards naranon and we have been supportive of each other searching for a meeting th...
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jj
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7
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768
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John & all who are my friends
(Preview)
Just now between 10:25 pm and 10:40 pm central time in the room, I felt ganged up on! All anyone has to do is read the transcripts. I know there are a couple people that do not talk to me and tonite they went over the edge! One saying to someone else not me,,,take the cotton out of your ears and put it in your mou...
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cdb
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11
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953
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SEEKING SOLUTIONS FOR OURSELVES
(Preview)
Clearly, a loved ones sobriety does not solve our problems, nor does physical separation or even death. Even those of us who have not been involved with any alcoholics for many years find that we continue to be affected by the family disease. In short, the effects alcoholism----obsession, anxiety,...
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gardengal
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4
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829
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Thank You! And continue to "THINK"
(Preview)
Applause, Applause to You, yes You posters on this message board.
Why? When I am able to POP in, I notice so many responses are:
---------------------
T houghtful
H elpful
I ntelligent
N ecessary
ind &nbs...
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wallsal55
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0
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599
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I'm Here
(Preview)
Well my A found out I was on here and was fine with it. I was . I have been searching for literature but haven't bought any yet. I don't have much I want to say yet. I would like feed back on what I do say though but I'm not getting much feed back. That's all I have to say for now.
Lanchas
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Lanchas
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13
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1081
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Quotes for Today/ depression
(Preview)
What you can do, or think you can, begin it.---Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Sept. 6th
"During acute depresion,....avoid trying to set your whole life in order at once. If you take on assignments so heavy that you are sure to fail in them at the moment, then you are allowing yourself to be trick...
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wallsal55
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2
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571
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Car Repairs
(Preview)
Need to vent. My daughter has had a lot of help from me over the past year, well actually since she turned 16 and dropped out of school. Well, that's ok, I have been trying to help her get on her feet. Anyway, after she got her DUI almost a year ago, I have had to help her even more. I...
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kathykelly
|
4
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947
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I'm perfect, you're not! so we think..
(Preview)
When I realized I was powerless, I wanted to leave him, why stay? It’s not my problem, I can’t fix it, so leave. Then in S4, I looked and saw clearly that I had faults, many faults. I was not, & never would be perfect. Would I want someone to leave me because of my faults?! Without even trying to stand by m...
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babs
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10
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1153
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Daughter getting out of treatment
(Preview)
Hello friends,
It sounds like my daughter may be getting out of the inpatient treatment center this week. We do have a family meeting with her on Tuesday too. She had a home visit today and it went well. She got to see her brother and his girlfriend too since they were here for the weekend. She is activel...
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cdb
|
8
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853
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where can I find braille, tapes, etc
(Preview)
Hi,
I've met in my f2f meeting a two people who's blind. They were requesting the following in braille, or tape, or cd. Can anyone offer suggestions? I've looked, but couldn't find. I would like to help them. Babs
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babs
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2
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958
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pot smoking husband. Any help?
(Preview)
I told my husband that he had to quit smoking pot or I would file for a divorce? He hasn't taken my hint yet; should I try something else? I don't know what to do...
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Orchid
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4
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988
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Worried about brother
(Preview)
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pepodwyer
|
3
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941
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looking for braille, tapes, cd
(Preview)
Hi,
I forgot to mention I was looking for (braille, tapes, cd)
One day at a time in al anon
Courage to change
Hope for today
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babs
|
0
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772
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Painted into a Corner
(Preview)
Last Sunday after a pretty eventful Saturday night for my A wife. Threatened suicide got hauled off to the Sherriff's for Mental Evaluation, etc. I told her I needed her to stop doing three things in order for me to stay in the marriage, Don't Drink, Don't gamble, Don't sleep with other me...
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Beskem
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9
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1081
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